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ALL IN THE FAMILY Seth Huggins brought his dilapi dated flivver to a noisy halt before the village store, and shouted up to the proprietor sunning himself by the doorway, "Wall, Si, you said I » couldn’t dew it, but, by cracky, I done it.” “You done whut?” asked the storekeeper. "Sold that there old bag-o-bones mare of mine—that’s whut I done.” he shouted exultantly. “Gosh amighty, but you air a smart one!” cried the amazed Si. "That there critter wam’t wuth a dime. Whut did you sell her fur?” “Nope, she wam’t wuth nothin,’ ’tis true,” agreed Seth. "But all the same I sold her fur a hundred dol lars—got the money right here in my wallet, too.” “Seth, I got to hand it to you,” de clared Si. "You shore air a slick trader. A hundred dollars! Why that there mare wam’t wuth even five dollars. She wuz 20 year old if she wuz a day and blind in one eye and spavined and wind-broke and all petered out. Who, in the name of St. Peter, did you sell her to?” "Who do you reckon?” exulted Seth. "I sold the critter to ma!” VOICE FROM THE REAR "Ruth,” moaned her long-suffer ing husband, “you promised you wouldn’t buy a new dress. What made you do it?” "Dear,” replied the modern Eve, “the devil tempted me.” "Why didn’t you say, ‘Get thee behind me, Satan’?” the poor man inquired. "I did,” the little woman replied sweetly, "and then he whispered over my shoulder, ‘My dear, it fits you just beautifully in the back.’ ” Shocking News The village dead-beat, returning to town after a long absence, was grati fied to find a new shop had sprung up on the main street during his travels, and that it bore the invit ing sign: "Come in and have it charged!” •Hoping that the new merchant’s ignorance of his bad credit reputa tion might enable him to get some thing without paying for it, the prod igal hastened into the new establish ment and eagerly inquired, “What do you charge here?” "Nothing but batteries,” was the obliging reply. Trimmed the Loss The man who always looked at the bright side of things had the misfortune to suffer from burglars who raided his store. "But it could have been worse,” he said philosophically. “You see, I didn't lose as much as I might have, for I had just finished marking down things for the month-end sale.” Not Root of AH Evil “Would you marry a man for his money?” asked one chorine of her girl friend the other day. “Not exactly,” replied the girl friend. “But I’d want my husband to have a lovely disposition, -and if he didn’t have money he’d very likely be worried and ill-natured.” STUBBORN, EH? The jury had been locked up for hours. One of the jurors had refused to agree to the view of the others. At last the officer of the court was instructed to provide refreshment. "Shall I order 12 dinners?” he said to the foreman. "Make it 11 dinners and a bale of hay,” replied the weary foreman. Wait Its Torn "Yo sho does look worried.” “Boy. I’se booked up solid on wor rying. I’se got so many worries on mah mind that if sumpin happens to me today. Ah won’t get time to worry about it foh two weeks.” Poor Old Pop Father — Be careful with that money. Son. Remember a fool and his money are soon parted. Son — I know, Dad, but I want to thank you for parting with it Just the same. THE- NEWBERRY SUN, NEWBERRY. S. C. NANCY LITTLE REGGIE * By Margarita MUTT AND JEFF By Bud Fisher REG’LAR. FELLERS Rv Gene Bvmes SILENT SAM THEY RE LINED S OP POR THE I START - / By Jeff Hayes A COMMON FAILING Passing by a small negro church recently, a traveler was attracted by the organ-like .tones of the par son’s voice coming from within. He paused to listen to the morning prayer, and learned a new term to describe sin, which was expressed in the following: “Oh Lord, dis yere little flock ob mine am prone to gossip! Oh Lord, dis yere flock ob mine am prone to bear false witness! Oh, Lord, dis yere flock of mine am prone to steal! Oh Lord, dis yere flock ob mine am prone to do things which ain’t fitten to mention in de house ob de Lord! Oh Master, deliver dem from de prone!” NO ADVICE WANTED Smith's legal expenses had been running high, so when he met his lawyer on the street, he said: "Nice day, isn’t it? Remember, I’m not asking you. I’m telling you." Executive Type Jeremiah agreed to cut the grass for two dollars, but when Mrs. Ste phenson returned home from a shop ping tour she found him lolling un der a shade tree while another man was painfully pushing the lawn- mower over the grass. “Shame on you, Jeremiah,” the lady admonished. "Hiring someone else to do your work for you. How much did you agree to pay him?” “Two dollars and fifty cents, ma’am,” was the lackadasical re ply. “Why, Jeremiah,” exclaimed the startled Mrs. Stephenson, “that’s 50 cenjs more than I agreed to pay you!” "Ah know dat, Miz Stephenson,” was the calm rejoinder, "but it am wuth 50 cents to be boss all after noon.” Why Work? The famous psychologist had just delivered a most interesting lecture, and was now conducting a question session. A timid little man down front held up his hand, and was recognized. “Doctor,” he said most respect fully, "did I understand you to say that a good poker player could successfully handle any sort of ex ecutive job?” “That’s exactly what I said.” was the confident reply. ‘Tell me. Doctor,” asked the little man, "what would a good poker player want with a job?” Played it Safe An astrologer who had foretold the death of one of the mistresses of Louis XI of France, which pre diction had been fulfilled, was sum moned into the royal presence to hear his own death sentence pro nounced as a consequence of his wicked prophesy. "Seeing you know everything,” said the King, "tell me, when will you die?” “Three days before your maj esty,” replied the astrologer. He kept his head. WILLING TO WAIT “How dare you swear before my wife,” demanded the indignant hus band. T am very sorry,” replied the in toxicated man, “I was unaware that your wife wanted to swear first.” Vacancy Coming Up There’s a tale going around a col lege campus of a certain English professor who went over to a local apartment house and asked to see the list of people living in it. He didn’t have to go through very many names before he found the one he was looking for, and said, “Put my name down for this man’s apart ment, please. I just flunked him, and he’ll be dropping out of school any day now.” Worth the Trouble “I believe you are thinner than the last time I saw you, Mrs. Jones. Are you taking treatments or diet ing to lose weight?” "Oh no, I’m losing weight be cause of all the trouble I’m having with my new maid.” "Why don’t you fire her?” "I’m going to just as soon as she worries me down to 140 pounds.” Night Golf Wife—Well, what excuse have you for coming in this time of night? Hubby—Well, my dear, I was playing golf with some friends and. . . . Wife—What? At 2 a. m.? Hubby—Sure; we were using night clubs. Old Red Eye "I hear the sergeant drinks some thing awfuL” "Yeah, I tasted it” SEWING CIRCLE PAHERNS 'lAJarm 'lAJeath er flor ^Jots (J3ullon-^Jrimmed 8138 12-42 1605 1-6 yri. Practical Outfit A DAINTY little trio for sunny weather playtime. Your young daughter will look adorable in this wing sleeved dress trimmed with colorful ric rac. A pert bonnet shades her face prettily — brief panties complete this practical outfit. • • • Pattern No. 1605 comes in sizes 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6 years. Size 2, dress, IVa yards of 35 or 39-inch; bonnet, & yard; panties, yard. Cap-Sleeved Frock CO SIMPLE and charming, you’ll ^ want several versions of this cap sleeved frock that opens down one side. Buttons arranged in threes make a stunning finish—a narrow belt ties softly on one side. Wear it everywhere with pride. * * • Pattern No. 8138 is for sizes 12, 14, 16, 18, 20; 40 and 42. 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