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f^iftiliiCKEgAY M t . REPORTER future Great Novelist Jy?t the Mini U Enjoy Such Bplcy Repartee ?? the Fallowing. T.if'J, ? ' ? Thackeray ojace acted ?? police r*. ./ Porter for the London Diogenes, and performed his work la no perfunctory way. How the future novellsi muit hart enjoyed observing and recording > > this bit of courtroom bumor: Pat Fogarty went oil tbe way from Manchester to London , In order to thrash Mick Fltspatrlck, which he did. V ' winding up tbe performance with the assistance of an "awful horseshoe/' He was detected and brought before Mr. Justice Slmpleman. "Well, sir," began the court, "you came here from Manchester, did youT" "Your honor baa. answered correct." "You see the complainant's bead; It waa cut by a sharp Instrument. Do you know what out It?" " "Ain't your honor after sayla' that a sharp Instbrumlnt did?" "I see you mean to equivocate," said the court, becoming restive. "Now, air, you cut tfeat head; you came here to cut It, did you not? Now, air, what motive brought you to Ixmdon?" "The locomotive, per honor .H "Equivocating again, you acoun drel!" said the court, waxing warm. Raising up the horseshoe, and holding It before Pat, he said, "Do you aee this horseshoe, sir?" "Is It a horseshoe, yar honor?" "Don't you see it Js, sir? Are you bHnd? Can you not tell at once that It Is a horseshoe?" > "Bedad, no, yer honor," "No?" angrily. "No, yer honor;.' but can yersllf telir ; v , "Of course. I can, you stupid Irish* nan/' "Ob, glory be to goodness, see what education 1st" soliloquised Pat, aloud. "Sure, yer honor, a poor, Ignorant creature like mesllf wouldn't know a horse'* shoe from a mare's." ? Youth'* Companion. LIKE THE WAIL OF BANSHEE Mournful Cry of the 8oreech-Owl Hoard In Youth, plainly Recalled * In Aftor Year.. From the orchard, too, on an autumn midnight, comes the mournful whistle of a screech-owl. Most of ua who hare heard the screech-owl at .all have heard Its call drifting down from an old orchard on a frosty October night The chill of coming winter, the cattle stamping in dark stables, a dim and ghostly world stretching over garnered fields to the mystery of the woods, and a gnarled, ancient orchard up the elope seem phantomlike under a wan ing moon ? these are the setting foi the screech-owl's mournful whistle. 1 ...can at this moment shut my eyes, re produce that whistle In my throat, and bring back to memory as if it wore .yesterday, the scene as my boyhood eyes saw It from my chamber win dow, whence I peeped with frosted breath before diving Into bed, and 1 can actually smell (for all the tobaccc smoke In my present study) the po cullar odor of the cold October night air, and feel again a vague, almost terrifying melancholy chill in my heart as, in the darkness, I heard from the orchard that reiterated whoo-oo oo-oo. Like the whip-poor-will on the pasture rail on a hot evening of July, this other night-singer of New Eng land seems to dwell just on the skirta of human habit at ion a and to keepoui souls reminded of the sadness of the world.-? Walter Prichard Eaton, iv \ iarper's Basar. *? s <*"> ' '' ' ' p. ; London aa a Frenchman 8eee It. Tho little Frenoh boy has every op portunity of getting an engaging ldoa of London, tlnja recent volume of French and general geography, whlob * baa run Into several editions, the com piler give? an Engllah reading from the works of M . Knault, whoever he may be. And the little French boy la * told concerning the London of this century that there are In the beat parts of our unhappy ctty "whole streets formed of dens dug oat of the soil, which Itself waa only a mass of ? rubbish." And again: "A little further on, bands of half-starved men without fire or abetter take refuge In gypey vans, which vana are bnried up to the axletree la mud." People also sleep la wheel leas cabs, for which they pay a rent of It ^4 cents a week. We Lon doners should not have known any thing about this if M. Bnault bad not told us! ? London Chronicle. Seep Bubtriee. The an*3ent Britons Invented soap. The Romans, two thoneand yeara ago, carried the invention back to Italy. They manufactured soap in Savona, whence the French rrerd for it ? ?* von. There are natural soaps ? the soap root of Spain, the eoapberry of Chill and the bark of the Peruvian soap tree. At Quartetare, In Mexico, soap takes of copper coinage. eat soap, nourish say they like tho taste, > V S>? ,1.1 J yon tn aald ?ngry. In tho **^F? ** . ' '^1 ? i : ? """ "v^ Among Friends "Well. well, look who's berel" cried MIm Connelly, gayly, " she teetered across the lunchroom toward the Xmr bio About vbloh sat her particular cir cle of friends, "Move over, klddo," she adjured little Jfiss Hoffman. "Make room (or your aunty." [ Mis# Hoffman obeyed, giggling. "Bay, Hoffy," aald if las Connelly, warning!*, as she set down her tray, wbleh contained a hygicnlcelly paraly sing collection of foodstuffs, "you bet ter be careful with them ingrowing wbeeses df yours. One of 'em's li able to strike i?*. Well, Mame," she continued after she had begun a; de termined attack on a large plec^ of roast pork, "how's the pink crepe da chine and the blue mesaallne com In' oaf* "They're aU right," replied lftlas V> terson. "I' was to ths dressmaker's last evening- The crepe de chine fits ?legsnt, but th# meesaline klnda book* lee around ths waist." "Say, ain't that too badr cried Miss Connelly. "Don't, for goodness sake, tell me there's anything wrong with the pink net tunic with the Jewel em* broidery. With my weak heart I don't believe I could atand the shock." Miss Peterson locked at her suspici ously. "1 don't know*s you need to bother about it." : ?til', ' ' t _ -J- ' L. ' ' ??? 4 Miss Connelly Included the group In ft comprehensive wink. "Girlies," she said, "ain't it funny bow hein* in love nukes some folks get sore so asy? Now, I thought when. Mame really got her hooks on Joe she'd be so tickled that she'd be sweeter'n pie. My! I'm disappoint* ?*?" W Miss Peterson bit her Up angrily. Miss Frlzkie broke into the conversa tion with the laudable object of smoothing the troubled waters. "Say, girlies," she cried, eagerly, "you'd ought to see the couple of ?well willow plumes Mam* got off the sale up In the millinery today., Peach es!" ' . "Willow plumes!" ejaculated Miss Larson, who up to this time had been giving her undivided attention to her luncheon. "Say, you are goln' some, ain't you, MameT Who's goln* to get Joe's supper while you're settln' round In your pink net tunics and willow plumes?" "Why, ain't you ashamed of your self, Stell Laron?" broke In Miss Con nelly. "Where did you get such com mon ideas? Didn't you know Joe's took a suite at the swellest hotel In town for the winter? You don't sup pose he expects Mame to do anything so unladylike as ? her own cooklh'? You'd better confine yourself to mak In' noises like a deaf and dumb party If you don't know no better'n that." "Oh, pickles!" sniffed Miss Larson. "You talk like a fish, Nell Connelly. But, on the square, Mame, I should think you'd rather wait a while on the chance of locatln' a fellow who could, maybe buy you some clothes after twenty years or so. Instead of ?tockln' up for the rest of your life." "Well, if it comes to that, Stell Lar son," said Miss Peterson, tensely, "I don't know as that pluhead I see you comln' down on the car with ever day looks like he was goln' to be able to buy swell clothes any more than Other folks' friends." "Oh, cut it, folks," Interrupted Miss Frirkle. "S eeins like this bunchid ought to bo able to get together once in n* while without scrappln'." Miss Connelly nodded appro* ingfr. "That's where you soaked the tack on the bean, Jen," ahe said. "Merry lit* tie sunbeams like us ought to be able to have a quiet, friendly meet without end in* up in * aluggin' match. Bat on the level, Matte," she added, turn ing to Miss Peterson, 'when are you ?nd Joe plannin' to pdll off that little matrimonial celebration?" '1 don't know** yon need worry about it!" snapped Miss Peterson. "Oh, I ain't goin' to bother none/* returned Miss Connelly. "But it hurta me to see a nice, industrious girl like you work so hard to land a fellow and have such awful poof luck. There ain't anything I wouldn't do to heijp yonl Norn-, If you get a strange hop on him some time and don't dare tot go for fear he'll ditch you,1 yon send me a hurry up call and HI be tlokled to come around and hang' on to blit while you run Miss Peterson rose so suddenly that her chair fell oyer with a crash. "Look here, Nell Connelly," ahe said, furiously, "some day youll find you're altogether too smart. I want you to understand that 1 don't pick fights with nobody, hsnsnsi that aln*t my nature, but whsn 1 do scrap I scrap to a finish. It's abo^t time for you to quit ' thla fuanfr business. I suppose yon thfnh yon make a terrible hit with Voor am art remarks, but I could tell you sows different! "Anyway, when * get as old as some folks maybe 111 have to call In some body to help land * fellow. When I get as old as tone folks I hope Hi know enough to mind my own bust hess." With this luminous speech Miss Pe terson gave the prostrate chair a kick and flounced away. ererrt^ft excepted except plresent^ompany,^ remarked iftss Con nelly, calmly. **OlrlS, pass m$ Mame'i fs that shs forgot to eat** ^ r7 ' ' ft" ~~ ? ~ " -f < ' "BROUGHT DOWN To HSLL." Maftthaw k L 20.?0? ??,*. 16. . "Ooms u*t? U?. at ( th*i fetor ??4 ?r? hrarp Mm, 0*4 I t?MI fi40ltam 9. M / CODAT'g 8TUPY tell. of tw? 0?r Lord upbraided the city wh?n? most o f Ills mljcbty work* bad beeo <looe, becrtuM th?; repeated not, because they did not note the power of God lo their midst and gladly receive tbe M?mk^ Such. Jesus declare^. will be fe*i pre pared to appreciate the Klugdom In the future than will <, tome who bave never known Him. Tyre and Sldon. beatbeo cities. would bave repented with far lees preaching, It ts bat In harmony with Divine Justice, there fore. that' when tbe Great Day of Ood'a favor and of tba Messianic Kingdom aball dawn, the people of Tyre and Bldon shall have things still more favorable than the people of Ohorasln and Bethsaida and Caper uautu. Jesps declared that Capernaum bad been exalted up to beavai|?-hiKh ly lifted op In point of privilege uud Divine favor j^nd blessing. This lng true. It meant that lp Justice Cm. pernaum'a fall would be proporttoapf e She would fall from the heights of heavenly privilege and favor down to MU-*o the grave. ' listen further to tbe reason for rlil? denouncement: 4,If the mighty work* which have been done lp thee fu??l been done in ?odom. It would have re (oalned unto this day; but'l say. 11 shall bo more tolerable for Sodom In the Day of Judgment than for thee." Let us not mistake tbe lesson: While only those who fully accept Christ und consecrate tbei* Hvee to pis service wilt ^ It- begetting, or /my shard In the Heav enly Kingdom, all the remainder of mankind who come to any knowledge of the Lord and HI* mercy and bleaalng, and who refrain from rendering hom age and from strW? Ing to walk to God's way. will DroDor "Not many great or rich kMf the go* pel not*.*' tiouateiy disadvantage themselves In respect to the future life and the great blessings and privileges and opportuni ties to be brought to all mankind through Messiah's -Kingdom land its reign of a thousand years. "I Thank Thee, O Father." it was in Jesus' day as It baa ever since been, that not many of th* great or rich or wise or learned ^sd ears to hearo the Gospel Message. The diffi culty with this claas la that tht things of the present life so fill and aatfsfy that they have no hungering .?r, the better things. Thus It has been that the majority of the followers of Jesus In every Age have been chiefly the poor of this world, rich In faith. But hearken again to the words of Jesus? how peculiarly they read: "1 thank Thee. O Father. Lord of heaven and earth, because Thou bast hid these things from the wise and prudent and has revealed them unto babes; even so. Father, for so It seemed good in Thy eight" How strangely those words once sounded to us, wh^n we supposed that all who failed to receive the Message of Jesus, all who failed to make their "calling and election sure" to membership in the Bride class, would suffer an eternity of torture! | How strange It seemed that Jesus should thank the Father that these things were hidden from some, of the grandest and noblest and most brU liant of our race! But now, how clear! how plain! Jeans wss preaching the Kingdom, and all who rejected , l?ls preaching rejected the Kingdom, and will lose it. This does not mean that they may not receive ultimately a blessing under that Kingdom, when it ahall rule the world* and when all that are In their graves ahall come forth to receive thoee very blessings which Jesus died to procure for them?the blessings of s trial, or judgment of a thousand years to determine whether they will be accounted worthy of ever lasting life, or $f everlasting ^eeth. | Few Knew the Father or tlie 8 on. All m?n are to be brought to a knowledge of God. The Scripture* df* clare. The knowledge of the glory of "tW'M God shall All the whole earth. '"Je aoi declared that W OO! caa know the Father exoept as be knowai>i$e Bob, or u the Son rereaje tbo Fatter &&*?8 failed to recogufa Jeetu aa the' Bon o? God tati ttot yet come to the foil appreciation or tMir pnru?fM. biiwh are our eyes, that now the; aee, and oar ear* i that now they hear, that Wo may fcitow toeealah, att<l through Hli know tho' FefS*^. * We are glad that *1! mankind In due tl?^ wfo U btoitfcht to a *l?*t knowl edge and full opportunity. But oh. how motif greeter to our bleoalng, be aldee the privilege of now being the eone o f God. and Jotnt-Wlel** gMooa Klntfomr Thetpeda Oo4 tttroctfi JMtu, therefot*l1 poor. tho - ttrokoh-honftoi; ? 1 laden* tboanoatWhrf:MOomt_ S&Sf&KiXSr y. ? fc wijMrw #j t \tr\ \ *< Yi ?*i|* r.or ; -. v'-'v ?.*|. ft, % . % '?&?: >' ?? jfj; t ? _ ? .? . ? W IS the kind that attracts favorable Hotice. To attain the desired re ' suit appropriate type is $s necces sary as proper workmanship and material. We have the right kind. r M-r ?'?> ;"*V-V .( -ri Give Qi jronr next order for Job printing. To Our WE are pleased to an nounce that we are now better prepared to serve you with anything you may need in the grocery line. o ? We are constantly adding to our grocery stock, which is always of the choicest se lection. ' - 1 1 ' -**Y ?'-.v r . "V ? ? v ? ' # Telephone 37 and *11 order* sent 1) us will reeaiva prompt attention, j ? Kirkwood Grocery ' ? jCOMPANY J. T. Burdell Surveyor Mid $nfineer Camden, S. C* * broke can W ma new at a nominal cotf. . Bring i and let ul give fo tf a pn*? on it anything in rea?on? rtone# re?e tered to suit your l|UM|? mnm t