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THE LEADER USC’s master disaster plan In a brilliant move that shows the administration is in tune with the needs of students, faculty and staff, the university is taking out parking spaces along Sumter Street to add green space. It’s called “streetscaping.” USC drivers will know it as “adding another level to parking hell.” The university has long shown a disregard for the cries of students, faculty and staff who can’t find parking spaces day after day. The university’s contention that there is enough parking on campus is laughable; all one has to do USC says It has a t0 figure out hpw laughable is uMaster Plan ” t0 watch the Parkin£ patterns .... . .’ at the lots behind the but its plan is „ less than Coliseum. Arguably among the worst on campus, the lots are masterful. often filled by 9 a m with cars circling for several minutes before either finding someone pulling out of a space or giving up in frustration. Parking lots around campus show similar problems: from the spots behind Bull Street Garage to the small lot across from the P.E. Center on Sumter Street, parking spaces across the campus are filled from dawn to dusk. But the university is pursuing a plan that will take out more spaces. And Sumter Street is just the beginning; other streets are also set to be “streetscaped” in coming years. The university once promised — with much bravado — that the Strom Thurmond Fitness and Wellness Center would include 15 acres of parking and exercise fields (while never giving a specific breakdown). But city/county planning director Rand Jorgenson told The State last September that the new parking is “just adequate for that facility.” University officials also say there will be a better transportation system that will help parking. This shows outright ignorance of the actual problem. Better and more available shuttles would fix the problem—if the problem were the availability of shuttles. It isn’t. The problem is that students have nowhere to park in order to board the shuttle system. USC says it has a “Master Plan,” but its plan is less than masterful. Indeed, if the university continues down the road of tearing out existing parking spaces before replacing them with new ones, the roadmap for the university’s physical future might as well be known as the Disaster Plan. GAMECOCK CORRECTIONS If you see an error in today’s paper, we want to know. Write us at gamecockviewpoints@hotmail.com. ABOUT THE GAMECOCK Martha Wright CONTACT INFORMATION Editor in Chief „ Offices on third floor of the Russell House. 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Additional copies uukes, Katie smitn, Barowsky, Denise Levereaux, may be purchased for one David stagg Jackie Rice, Stacey Todd dollar each from the Department of Student Gamecock Community Affairs Media, crystal Boyles, B Baugh. Karen Yip Corey Garriott. Jason 7 & Harmon, Jill Martin, Carolyn Rowe Why I’m on the road to hell those attacks happened because we have taken prayer and the Ten Commandments out of schools. They believe those attacks happened as a result of women and homosexuals fighting to obtain equality. And they believe those attacks happened because of our liberal and leftist ideals. For them, if you ain’t on the right, you ain’t right with God. Someone needs to take the Bibles away from Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson and smack them upside their heads with it. Or maybe they just need to read them properly. Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson are perverts. They have perverted their positions in Christianity irreparably. They are truely men of the devil in that they have used their positions of power, not for the betterment of humanity, but for their own personal political propaganda and self aggrandizement. Isn’t that what the devil did before he was ousted from heaven? Since when did these people gain the authority to tell the world what God’s will is? They have no more ability to determine that than you or I have. Furthermore, I never heard God himself say these attacks were an act of vengence. All I heard were the misinterpretations of some crazy old Christian fanatics who took a tragedy and twisted it around to make it tie in to their own personal agendas. But, since Jerry and Pat read the Bihle 10 times a day, I guess they must be right. The beliefs I hold so dear are probably evil and will send me to hell. In a lame attempt to save my hellhound soul, I would like you all to say a prayer with me. Let us pray: Lord, please forgive me for believing that homosexuals are human beings too, and, therefore, should be treated humanely. Lord, forgive me for believing that women should be treated as equals. Forgive me for believing that women should not be subservient to men. Lord, forgive me for believing that it is wrong for the children of Muslims and Hindus to be subjected to the Ten Command ments. Forgive me for respecting their religion. You see God, 1 have known some Christians who are far more evil than my Muslim friends. Forgive me for having respect for my fellow man, irrespective of his or her religion, sex or race. After reading the Bible, 1 thought that was what Christianity was all about. I guess I was wrong. And Lord, please accept me into “Pat Robertson heaven, ” where only undersexed, cranky old white men carrying overused Bibles are permitted to enter. But I guess it’s too late for praying now. I will probably go to hell for my tolerant views. I can’t wait to see Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell there, so I can tell them how wrong they truly were. The false hype about college CHARLES PRASHAW CEPRASHAW@YAHOO.COM Life here is not the drunken demon hell ride we were led to believe. This column is strictly for guys, so please, women, don’t read this. It’s bad enough I’m slowly earning a reputation as the foul-mouth, rude and offensive Gamecock columnist. So please, ladies, read something else; the rest of this column is mostly BS anyway. All right, guys, I think I have figured out the biggest problem of all time when it comes to college. It’s not what most people complain about: parking, dining services, washing clothes, housing, class, work, class-work, money or freak flag football injuries that end in broken collar bones. No, it’s the hype of college, stupid. It’s the movies, the mythology of college, and the kind of shit so many guys were sold on by Hollywood. It’s that crap that every pinhead that owns the poster of John Belushi downing a bottle of Jack was sold on. I have a little cousin who is a sophomore in high school and for some reason him and his little friends think college is some drunken demon hell ride filled with parties and random women. They also think that I’m holding out when I tell them I have no great, fantastic, unbelievable stories to share about college. Basically, you go to class and you work all week and at the end of the week there is a football game. Sprinkle in some beer every now and then, and VOILA, that’s college. I’m sorely disappointed; college is not turning out to be the Animal House they think, or, for that matter, I thought it was going to be. Where’s the massive 15-kegger house parties, the massive orgies, the panty raids (I believe I was promised a panty raid) or the classic moving of the provost’s furniture outdoors for a big school prank? Hell, I haven’t even seen Provost Odom's furniture before. Hell, I haven’t even seen Provost Odom in a good year, now that I think about it. I know what most of you are thinking: We have a provost? What does he do? Never mind — here’s another perfect example of college not being like the hype; have you seen the previews to the new Fox show Undeclared? There is no college in America like this — you can believe that. I’ve been in college for two years now, and stuff like that doesn’t happen. It’s not one sex scene right after another, as the previews would lead you to believe. Oh, no, quite the opposite; you’ll probably be studying physics tonight, not making out with some really hot blond chick with big boobs. While I’m on it, what the hell is the deal? College needs a lot more slutty girls. In high school, there were tons of girls who were sluts. I say screw recruiting more National Merit Scholars; I feel this university needs more sluts. By the way, I’d love to kill that guy who said, “You’ll never be surrounded again in your life by so many young, hot, single women.” Yeah, brother, that might be true, but half of them won’t give you the time of day. Also, after doing some calculations based on USC’s web page, there are 3,554 more females on campus than males. But, somehow, I know way too many guys that don’t have girlfriends. What are you girls waiting for? Look, ladies, you better pick one now, while you’re still in college, because, unfortunately, this is the cream of the crop. Crap, I’m out space for this week. I could wax philosophical about this kind of stuff, but I got to go. At least I didn’t mention the terrorist attacks. IN YOUR OPINION Lou Holtz should apologize to USC I think Lou Holtz should apologize to USC, and to others, for coming onto the field in the first quarter of the Mississippi State game to yell at his player, #91. Let’s put football aside for a moment and consider Lou Holtz’s actions: A young collegian apparently made an error, so Mr. Holtz deemed it appropriate to humiliate him in front of millions of viewers. Sadly, nobody seemed to care. Such despicable coaching manners are so common place that the commentators did not even seem to notice Mr. Holtz’ horrific temper tantrum. Could a university debate coach get away with this? How about a music professor? What would happen if a math teacher humiliated a student in front of just a few of his or her classmates as Lou Holtz humiliated this player? I am sure Coach Holtz is a great man, and he is undoubtedly a great coach. However, he’s great despite his lack of civility, not because of it. A great coach does not have to berate his players. The rules that apply to the rest of the University’s officials need to apply to football coaches, too. GREG SMITH, ESQ. SALT LAKE CITY. UTAH Columnist’s view racist, unwelcome Reading the article, “To Get Bin Laden, Bomb the Innocent,” by Taylor Marshall-Green, in Friday’s issue of The Gamecock, was extremely disturbing. His entire article is focused upon hateful rhetoric towards anyone of Arabian decent. Patriotism for the USA does not mean the isolation of an entire group of people based specifically on their skin color and ethnicity, yet lies in us using our collective energies to overcome this horrible tragedy. His “viewpoints” were utterly tasteless and, to put it bluntly, were RACIST. If this journalist doesn’t recognize it—and obviously he doesn’t—this article isolates more than just people of Arabian background, but also people of other nationalities including many AMERICANS. Everyone is concerned about what has happened to our nation, but hateful rhetoric vowing reverse acts of terrorism is not the solution and only breeds contempt from those races that were slandered. The Gamecock may De a place where social common tary is welcomed, but this was an all-out attack on anyone who may have ties to the Middle East. Therefore, it served no purpose but to incite racism towards Innocent people who did not commit these acts of terrorism against our nation. Remember, hate only breeds ignorance. CEDRIC WEST SECOND-YEAR STUDENT. COLLEGE OK JOURNALISM AND MASS COMMUNICATIONS Editor’s Note: Mr. Marshall Green 's column was meant to be sarcastic, and we apologize for any confusion caused by the piece. Submission Policy Letters to the editor or guest columns are welcome from the Carolina community. Letters should be 250-300 words. Guest columns should be about 600 words. Both must include name, phone number, professional title or year and major, if a student. Deliver handwritten submissions to Russell House room 333, or send e-mail submissions to gamecockviewpoints@hotmail.com. The Gamecock reserves the right to edit for libel, style and space. Anonymous letters will not be published. Photos are required for guest columnists and can be provided by the submitter. Call 777 7726 for more information. DARRYL GREEN DRGREEN22@HOTMAIL.COM If Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson say it’s so, it must be true. I’M GOING TO HELL! If I don’t change my views quickly, I am going to be kissing the hoof of the devil himself. What is my sin? Well, I believe that women should have the right to pursue their dreams without any sort of abatement whatsoever. I believe that people should be treated with respect no matter what their sexual orientation is. I believe that it is wrong to subject the children of Muslims and atheists to the Ten Commandments when they go to public schools. And I believe that just because a person practices a religion other than Christianity does not necessarily doom that person to hell. All of these views will send me straight to hell, according to Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell. They are the two religious leaders who believe the attacks on Washington, D.C. and New York occured because God is angry with us. They believe