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Member of South Carolina College Press Association Published on Tuesday of Every Week by the Literary Societies of the University of South Carolina. '$UBSORWTIQ1N VATE-4L50 A YHAR. Entered as second class mail matter at the Columbia, South Carolina Postoffice on November 20, 1908. News articles may be contributed by any member of the student body, but must be In by Friday nigbt before Tuesday's publication. Hand in copy typewritten and donble-spaced. Names must be signed to copy. Articles will be published in the Open Forum as submitted, with the name of the author signed. STAFF LITMLE JUMPE BLAN4ICHEAD . . . . . Editor-in-Thief CHARLES KENNETH GRIMSLEY Damaging Editor FURMAN. ... . . . . .. Ass-social Editor JACK ASSEY . . . . . . .. Ass-ociate Editor JOHN BURTON . . . . . . Ase-ociate Editor WILLIE C. COX . . . . . . . . Associate Editor OPHELIA RUMP . . . . . . . . A.s-ootate Editor CLEMSON . . . . . . . . . Ass-social Editor EDITORIAL, SrAFF ARTHUR MEDLOOK -. - . . . Ping-Pong Editor JOHN BOLT CULBERTSON . . . . . . Scandal Editor COLE L. BLEASE . . . . . . . Alumni Editor W. W. JONES.-... . ..... Fraternity Editor BOB JUMPABOUTSKI . -.. . . . . Exchange Editor U. B. GOOD - .- .-.-. . . . . Joke Editor ' GARDNER TINMAN . -S-.-..... .ocial Editor CO-ED STAFF CLAUDE R. DUNSAR . . . Editor " MAX REVELISE . . . . . . Gossip Editor LUCRETIA BORGIA -. . . . . Society Editor CATHERINE THE GREAT . . . . . . Feature Editor RED TEXAS COOBURN -. -.-.... Ad-Vice Editor BVSINESS STAFF HELEN B. GENTLE . - . . .. Business Manager R. . EA - Business Assistant JOHN M. YOUN -- . . . . Business Assistant BIG DIC DOUGLAS Ciclto aae JOHN 0. YCHARDS, DEAN McKISSICK, EDDIE Managsr PRITCHARD, BILL E. ELLIOTT, HARRY HINOSON . News Boys CAREY GREGORY . -. - ...... Printers Devil MONDAY, APRIL 1, 1929 Mary puts sand in her sanwiches, and Carey eats them like a man. A man is telling a lie when he says that he would hit a man for calling him a liar. Girls are satisfied with "that" as long as they allow the boys to have "it." -.s.. Yellow Journalism What is Yellow Journalism? That is perhaps the question that comes to us at present. Anyway, if readers of The Gamecock believe everything they read in this issue-well, they are fools. AhI this is the first day of April. No-Knock Gas Everybody understands that there is a certain kind of gasoline guaranteed to prevent knocks. We be lieve the correct, or technical name for it is "No-Nox." By the time the Yellow Sheet is read, we are afraid there will be a great many knocks heard about the campus. We wish to suggest that a little "No-Nox" gas be taken before you read and believe everything in this sheet. Companionate Marriage The Yellow Sheet today carries an article on the introduction of companionate marriage at the Uni versity of South Carolina. We honestly believe this fulfills a long felt need at Carolina. Now, there is no need for suppression. There are a great many boys in our school who are not able financially to get married. And all of these boys are dead in love with their co-ed "sweeties." Yet, under the new ruling by Dr. Doug las, they are permitted to cast a chance at the Honor able Judge Lindsay's plan. The only objection is the fact that a decent per centage of the more bashful students are leaving school, in fear that they will be used as targets for the ex periment. As we see it, another dormitory will have to be built right away, to be used exclusively by married couples. It might be interesting to note that not ali of the co-eds approve of the plan. Perhaps they have a. good reason for their opposition. But, anyway, just look what companionate marriage isl -u.s.c.. Etiquette There are many ways in which a student should know how to conduct himself. This also includes girls. But at the present time we wish to briefly speak of the mannerisms in love. There are very few people who get around the age old problem of love. And it has always been a problem as to how and what should be done at exactly the right time. The other day we saw a couple go to the back of the extension building. The purpose was to "love." It was executed in a very good manner. All lovIng should be done in secret places. This couple did the right thing. They thought nobody saw them, but it so happened that somebody was looking through a window. The boy picked up the girl--and he kissed her right in the mouth. In other words, his lips touched hers. We saw a. couple,In class..the other day, loving. The boy had his arm srrpund .the girl. And she had her finger in her mottth'-ba'shful. After all is .said' and done, We believs thie tniversity is a good plae--for the training of boys and girls in etiquette. The girl's pardor in the dormitory (which one?) Is a typical school. We Want A B-.r The Gamecock takes opportunity a' this time to call attention to the dire need of a brewery on the Caro lina campus. While it is. understood that this would save a great many students of trouble, Jt would per baps bring trouble upon a great many. tean Baker's only objection to the introduction of a brewery is based on the opinion that it would lead many innocent boys and girls astray that have not already deviated from the straight and narrow path. The Gamecock would like to see a committee ap pointed at once. And we would suggest that the brewery-be stationed in the canteen. Although Coca Cola is used a great deal by patrons of the canteen, we believe that something like home brew would be a' very favorable substitute. Lets have the brewery! Booze Bumming The Gamecock? No. The Shamecock? No, not 'quitel The Yaller Sheet? Yes. There is a great deal of scandal about us everywhere in the world. The Yaller Sheet is bringing out the truth for once. As we have already said, "the wages of sin ip publicity." We are telling the truth, and we feel like the truth shall make us free. That is, if we tell the truth, we feel like we are at liberty to do so. Carolina has her dances and receptions. They are attended by some of the faculty members as well as students. But we are tired of faculty members bum ming booze off of the boys at the dances. It is a perpetual nuisance. They feel like they can demand this of the students without any degree of restraint. The Yaller Sheet would like to see an end put to this right away. Why shouldn't members of the faculty buy their own booze, same as the students do? Another complaint is raised by the students, based on cigarette bumming by the faculty. Which is the lesser of the evils, we are unable to tell. But there is. time for less booze bumming and bottle belly-aching by members of the faculty. Professors seldom ever dismiss a class any more, without calling a student back and asking him or her for a drink. It is A Shamecockl Ask us for more questions and lnswers and less booze! Then students will stop carrying flasks in their hip pockets. High Cost of Passing Prices of passing grades are going up, says an old grad who saw the staggering poor students nourishing their professors on corn juice at a gym dancer "In the' good old days, when beer sold for $4 a barrel, I often watched faculty members attempting to hide a cask under their abdomens on slipping away from a discipline committee meeting which tried sopho mores for drinking. Bribery was cheap in those days." Now the old disorder has yielded to the new, and ancient gutters are being lined with asphalt. Rock Smith demands at least five gallons for an "A," four for a "B," three for a "C," and the man who cannot pay two bucks a half-gallon is doomed to flunk. Reed Smith, of the famous Smith Brothers hiccup drop couple, no longer takes his plunder by the quart, but does appreciate hair tonic. Large quantities have been given him, and as his hair has shown no improvement there is no doubt as to how it was used. Dean Irene Dillard now drinks hers straight, and pity the dry student who cannot come across. Old Dr. Wauchope, the poetry king, has a hump on his Adam's apple from reading that thing, but he has been known to smoke two or three cigarettes simultaneously to alleviate it. Of course it takes lubrication to do that. And Dr. Douglas actually drinks Coca-Colas. No wonder the alumni are ashamed to listen to his declara tions of the campus purity. The Love Question Co-educational marriages are the curse of this or any other campus. Men and women in their prime, with their best and wildest years before them, get caught by Cupid and are compelled to behave when they have formed habits that hinder such conduct. A search for the cause of this lamentable condition has been conducted by Miss Red Texas Cogburn, Ad Vice Editor of the Shamecock, and Miss Cogburn 4e cdares that she has discovered the instigator of the youthful marriages. The god Hymen is supposed to arouse all marital desires in the human breasts, Miss Cogburn revealed to Kenneth Grimsley, Damaging Editor of the Shame cock, and Hymen has been bearing his torch before many of the co-eds. ' When Judge makes Hymen stop bearing his torch before co-eds the weddings will stop, according to Miss Cogburn's story. "Hymen Is the cause of it all. He' starts thingg going, and then lets them get beyQnd his control. .I don't understand it, and besides, I don't see why all marriage business is important. It never has been so to me," were the Ad-Vice Editor's exact words. We feel thst we are serving a great purpose to Uni .versity students through the Ad-Vice columni. There fore, we believe we have made the understanding clear Iin this editorial. ROSE-MARY TEA RQ M ' OVER WINGFIELDS ONE8207 The Rose-Mary Invites You to Eat With Us We are prepared to take care of your. BAnquets and Parties, large or small ATTRACTIVE MONTHLY RATES What We Say It Is--It Is Russow Jewelry Co. School and College Rings and Pins FRATERNITY PINS, CRESTS CHARMS AND MONOGRAMS ATHLETIC AND SCHOOL MEDALS PRIZE CUPS 1522 MAIN STREET PHONE 7808 FOUNTAIN PEN INKS Sheaffer's Skrip-5 Colors, 15c Sheaffers Skrip--Permanent Royal Blue, 25c Carters, Watermans, Staffords Inks, 15e Higgins Eternal Ink, 150 Higgins Drawing Inks-Assorted Colors 25e THE STATE BOOK STORE 1224 MAIN STREET "The House of Quality" The R. L. Bran 3EOr1 andmpcaltie Bar Candy and Chewing Gum Binding, Office Furniture 3 for 10canSpclte Cigaretts-15c per pkg., $1.19 per Cartoon (Old Gold, Chester- COLUMBIA, S. C. field,' Lucky Strikes) (S. C. Tax Extra) Bos Sainy Pitn A Barber Shop one block from the University for Mon and Women State Barber Shop Ground Floor State Office Building COLUMBIA, S. C. Under Management of Palmetto Barber Shop Wingfield's Drug Store 1443 MAIN STREET ] WILFRED CAFETERIA Sign of Good Food UNIVERSITY STUDENTS ALWAYS WELCOME J Billy Bull's Sylvan Bros. A Meal A Minute JEWELERS and DIAMOND MERCHANTS 1211 Gervais Street Most complete stock of sterling silver prize cups in the Carolinas. SANDWCHES& WAFLE Class rings and pins of the better SADIHESRT WARDERS kind, .made up to suit your ow acquainted. Ham and Egg Sandwich-15c 1500 Main St. Columbia, S. C. CENTRAL DRUG CO. 1204 Nain StreetI OPEN ALL NIGHT "LET ED DO IT" George H. Davis, Campus lRepresentative Tenement 9-Room 11 SUITS OLEANEUD 88o One Day Service in Cleaning PHNEED. ROBINSON POE8187-818b 1017 GrVAmr ST. o