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THE SUN, NEWBERRY. S. C, SEPTEMBER 18. 1942 Kathleen Norris Says: Let Your Daughter Find Freedom Bell Syndicate—WNU Features. My mother suggests that Lee and 1 come to her for dinners at regular boarding rates; but that would mean marketing, and dishtvashing on the old terms, except that we would be paying more than we aan afford. By KATHLEEN NORRIS OW much claim have an old father and mother upon the time, money, youth, happiness of their chil dren? It’s an old question, nev er to be satisfactorily answered, for even when it’s all reasoned out, human hearts will solve it as affection and weakness and filial obedience dictate, and elderly tyrants will cpntinue to have things their own way. Nina is 28; she has been the main support of a family of four for eight years. For six of those years she has been engaged to be married; her husband-to-be is a young doctor with no very bril liant prospects; Nina has no money saved and they are wondering whether they dare take the chance of marrying, with the possibility of obligations to his old people and hers staring them in the face. “My father died last May, after years of invalidism,” writes Nina. “My mother is a strong capable woman of 66, but she has bad eyes, cannot read, and lives in constant fear that blindness will overtake her. My little sister Bessy went to State Normal college as I did, and I ex pected that her salary as a teach er would help out at home, but she married very young and now has three small babies, though she is only 23. Uncle Assists. “My uncle pays taxes and insur ance on our little cottage, amount ing to about $200 a year; I pay everything else. With my father’s insurance money I have turned our two front rooms into a separate apartment, with a bath and kitchen. This is already rented for $40 a month. Bessy cannot help my moth er; Lee, my sweetheart, makes $1,500 a year as a resident at the hospital, and is beginning to have a few private patients; not a very good chance that I could help my mother either, in any crisis. “I am sick with longing for my own home,” the letter goes on. “It is misery for a man and woman who love each other to put off again and again the time of their happi ness together, and we have grown weary and impatient, sometimes to the point of almost breaking with each other, during these long years. I have not had money for pretty things, for the holidays we might have had together; I have worn my cousins’ clothes, schemed and wor ried to make ends meet until I feel like an old woman. “My mother says now that she cannot possibly manage on $40 a month, that I must go on teaching until Lee’s income warrants our leaving her. Lee says that a doc tor’s wife cannot possibly be a teacher, that it is too much of a strain on our nerves. There is no money for a trousseau, and even with the most modest little apart ment, there must be good manag ing on our small income. “I want so to be happy, to be loved and free and able to rest in my home as other women do! I want so to pay Lee back for these generous years of waiting! But on the other hand, there is my moth er, and my aunts assure me that they would not be surprised if she were to be taken ill and die as a result of the shock of my leaving. No Vacation in Five Years. “It is five years since I have had any vacation except the Christmas vacation, for I teach in summer at a woman’s college. My mother is BAD COMPANY The memories of unfulfilled ambitions and lost opportunities make the worst kind of company and are certainly not a desirable substitute for the joy of accom plishment. The woman who faces middle age with only “if’ and “when” and “but” to show for the things she might have done with her youth faces also the prospect of an unhappy old age filled with regrets. That is why Kathleen Norris has written this message to young girls and their mothers who love them but will not let them go. Be sure to read her answer to this letter from a girl who has been en gaged for six years. a good cook, and she suggests that Lee and I come to her for dinners at regular boarding rates, but that would mean marketing and dish washing for me on the old terms, ex cept that we would be paying $60 a month—more than we could afford unless I went on teaching. I am so perplexed between them all I don’t know what to do; I long to get away from everything, and wish Lee could get an offer from some far away city and I could simply walk out on the routine and drudgery, re sponsibility and worry that have been mine so long!” The chances are that the capable, affectionate mother is making quite a martyr of herself, just widowed and with Bessy married and now Nina deserting her! And the chances are also that she would tell you that her whole purpose in living was to make life easier for her girls and contribute, at any sacrifice, to their happiness. Such mothers never look back and remember just how little their own mothers’ plans and desires mat tered to their own youth. They stepped off happily into matrimony; they took it for granted that every young woman has a right to her own j life. And so she has. If Nina’s mother has to take boarders, let them be boarders other than Nina and Lee. Nina and Lee have a right to pri vacy, to the delights of their own home, no matter how small and plain it is. Coming every day to the same old dining-room for din ner, hearing the same old problems of leaking faucets or broken win dow-blinds, what freedom is Nina going to enjoy? She will wipe the same old dishes, answer the old tele phone, sit down to the same two games of cribbage just as she has done for years. Mother Owes Apology. Nina has given enough of her life to her old people. It is her mother who ought to be grieving, who ought to be apologetic that she has man aged her affairs so badly that this splendid daughter isn’t to have a pretty wedding, an outfit of lovely new clothes with which to go to her husband. My advice to Nina is to get mar ried at once, and let her helpless mother, her criticizing aunts, and her generous cousins and uncle set tle all the problems that her mar riage causes at home. Doctors have a way of prospering, and doc tors’ wives are fortunate women, because the incessant tragedies and responsibilities of the greatest pro fession teach a man the value of home life, serenity, affection, child hood. The years ahead will be kind er to Nina than those that have gone; hers has been the sort of girl hood that makes for a happy and grateful maturity. Old/ FOR, Victor: AT Tireslone To < i I the men and women of the Firestone organization, whose loyalty* skill* and efficiency have won the nation's highest industrial tribute* we extend our sincere appreciation of the fine spirit and whole-hearted cooperation which merited these Army* Navy Production Awards. To our fellow Americans, we of the Firestone organization affirm that we regard this high honor as a challenge for the future as well as a reward for the past. 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