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Fable of the Criminal Outfit 86 By GEORGE ADE ?. 1111. Bell Byndlocut*. ? WNU Bervic*. ONCE upon a Time a Business Man named Kingsbury Gilpin was riding on top of a Bus. It was a bright, snappy Day, with an early Harbinger of Frost in the air and Mr. Gilpin had just booked a large Order, so he was feeling top high and Aces. It happened that there was seated alongside of Mr, Gil pin a Bird of stern Countenance who didn't look as if he had a Smile left lu stock, so Mr. Gilpin thought he would try to cheer the lugubrious In dividual by Chatting with him pleas antly In regard to the Weather. "It's a swell Day, ain't It?" asked Mr. Gilpin, as he turned and faced the Stranger. "Aim ! J u st as I suspected !" ex claimed the Party thus addressed. "You have Llcker on your Breath. You have been defying the Constitution and By-Laws. I am a Special Officer, assigned to the Department of Sniffing. Come with me I** "Nothing has passed by my Lips to day except Cherry Phosphate," pro tested Mr. Gilpin. "What you smell Is a Special Preparation which I use on my Hair. It contains a Percent age of Alcohol." "I never knew a Violator who didn't try to pull an Alibi," said the Enforce ment Officer. "Furthermore, you have acknowledged your Guilt by owning up to Possession. This is the most important Capture I have made in Weeks," Now it happened that while Mr. Gilpin was being taken to the Uoose gow, his elder Son named Wilfred was only two Blocks away, with a Brief Case under his arm. He was taking a set of Contracts over to a Lawyer to have a few Jokers Inserted. He started to Whistle and a Cinder blew into his Mouth. Perhaps it was a Judgment from Heaven. Chip of the Old Block. He spat it out. There Is no Law against Whistling on a Public High way, but any kind of Spitting, Cinder or no Cinder, is Just the same as rob bing the Ice Box in an Orphan Asylum. Wilfred felt a pair of Strong Hands gripping at his Wing-Pipe. "Arrest this Man !" shouted one of those Bystanders who is always ask ing to have some one arrested. Then a Policeman came ponderous ly and struck Wilfred over the Head with his Club, after which he inquired as to the Facts in the Case. As sev eral excited Spectators pieced together all the Details of the Outrage, the Mob which had collected, ' became uneasy and then turbulent. "Hang him! Hang him I" shouted the furious Citizens. "No!" exclaimed the Policeman, fighting back the Crowd. "His Life belongs to me." Within a few Minutes after Kings bury Gilpin had been chuckled into a dark, subterranean Cavern reserved for the more hardened Type of Offen ders, the Steel Door clanged again and Into the dark and suffocating Gloom came another Prisoner, hurled with great Force by the Rough Attendants. Mr. Gilpin crawled over to wipe the Blood from the unhappy Wretch and recognized ? his Son ! "To what do you nttrlbute your Downfall?" asked Wilfred of his Father. "Lax Discipline and unpardonable Negligence on the Part of my Par ents," replied Mr. Gilpin. "Same here," said Wilfred. Just then they heard the Chains dragging again. A Key turned in the cumbersome Lock. The bobbing Light of a Candle showed the Skeleton Bars in painful distinctness. A stumbling Football and a dark Figure was thrust Into the Dungeon. The Newcomer felt his way along the Wall and came Face to Face with Mr. Gilpin. The two Men peered at each other. "Eugene !** "Master 1" It was Eugene Wellington, the Hired Man. "Yon here, Eugenn?" "Yes, Master ? I!" When Girls Leave Home. "Speak, man! Be brave. It may relieve yon to Confess." "They've had Spotters at work since Spring and at last they nabbed me. I forgot to separate the Garbage from the Ashes." Two Honrs passed. The Gllplns were trying to sleep and Eugene wns weeping silently. It was the letter who aroused his Companions. "I^ook!" he said, "a Woman!" Sure enough, the Guards were drag glng down the Stone Stairway a fash ionably-clad Young Woman whose Hair would have been hanging down her back In Confusion, except that It had been Robbed. "I didn't see It !** she shrieked. "I was looking the Other Way." "Tell that to the Judge," replied the Turnkey, and pushed her Into the Cell. She saw the Men back In the Semi Darkness and shrank from them in Terror. "Fear not,* *<tld Kingsbury Gilpin. "We are Enemte* of Sdclety, hut w? do not harm defenseless Girls." "Father P "Leonora lH It was the Only Daughter of Kings bury Gilpin, recently returned from*^ Finishing School on the State Road leading from New York to! Boston. After she had calmed down she told her Story. It seemed that a Green Light was showing and the Traffic Cop had his Right Hand up, bo she made a Left Hand Turn, whereas she should have waited for a Blue Light and a Left Hand Signal and then gone Straight Ahead. When she had concluded her Father was convul?cd with Grief. "I blame myself as much as 1 blame you," he said, brokenly. "I heard all of those. Stories about Finishing Schools, but 1 wouldn't believe them." It must have been along toward 8 p. m. when Mr. Gilpin was aroused from an uneasy Slumber by Leonora, who whispered to him : "Father, are you strong? Are you brave?" "Speak !" "Who do you think Is here?" "The Pastor of the Presbyterian Church?" "No, Anthony !" A Terrible Night. "My little Boy? My prattling, laugh ing. innocent Anthorfy?" "Yes, that is He lying on the Floor over by the Doorway. They used the Militia to bring him in." "And what has he done to merit this awful Disgrace?" After they recovered from the first Shock they discussed among Them selves as to whether Mr. Gilpin should put in a Plea of Insanity or have the Chamber of Commerce, the Rotarlans and other Organizations name a Com mittee to call on the Governor and ask for a Pardon. It seemed that Ages had passed and then the Guard brought them some Water and Dry Bread. In Hotels and Restaurants it often happens that Pa trons are compelled to eat heavy and Indigestible BVead, fresh from the Bakery, but the Inmates of Penal In stitutions always get it Dry. Eugene Wellington had rolled up his Coat and put it under Anthony's head and the Boy was moaning pitifully. All of the Others were silently crouched about, immersed in mel ancholy Reflections. Finally there was Silence. "He sleeps," whispered Eugene. "It is well," said Kingsbury Gilpin, softly, "for it will be a sad Awaken ing." "Hush ! What was that?" "I heard naught." "Yes, it Is the Shuffle of Feet and the metallic Clangor of Prison Gates. Another Soul Is doomed to Torture." Enter Madame. All of them listened. They heard the Muffled Curses, the dull Reson-* nnce of Steel against Steel and Words of harsh Command. Then a Scream. It was the hysteri ca^ Cry of a Woman In Agony. "Ruffians!" exclaimed Mr. Gilpin. "They send a weak Woman to a Liv ing Death and gloat over her suffer ings." He sprang to his Feet and shook the massive Bars with the Fury of a Madman. "Brutes! Cowards!" he shouted. Anthony awoke and began to Sob with Fear. It was a dirty Lay-Out, all around, no matter what you say. Two Guards staggered to the Door way. They dragged between them a Woman. She had fainted. ' In with her !" cried one burly At tendant, hoarsely. The Door opened and the reeling Woman fell Into the Arms of Kings bury Gilpin. Tenderly he lifted the stray Locks concealing her Face. "My Wife!" he shrieked. It is as the Reader has surmised The new Prisoner was Mrs. Gilpin. "Where am I?" she asked, faintly as she opened her Eyes. Here, with your Husband, and Wil fred, and Leonora, and Anthony and a so Eugene Wellington, the Hired Man." It all comes back to me now," she said, in a weak voice. "I would have compiled, at the first Request, but the Woman who made the Complaint had been using Henna and Wore Gold in her Teeth and I wouldn't let that Hussy get away with Anything. The next Thing I remember, I was in the Bine Wagon." "What was It all about, Honey?" asked Mr. Gilpin, tenderly. Just as I told you. I was at the Movies and failed to remove my Lld.H MORAL: Those who have not yet got it may do so nt nny Moment. Long-Standing Dispute Over Discovery of Tea The discovery of tea seems to be hidden In the mists of conflicting leg ends. China places the discovery back in 2700 II. C. ; Japan credits it to a pious disciple of Buddha ; the monks In Thibet were said to have discov ered tea when they noticed the good effect upon their goats from feeding upon a strange glossy leaved plant. Tea, after the people of the Orient had enjoyed Its restful qualities for many centuries, gradually found its way to other sections of the world. The Dutch brought ten to Europe In 1010 and the English beenme acquaint ed with It In 1015. However. Arnhla wan familiar with the beverago about 850 and the Venetlnns learned of it In 1559. Ten for a time sold In England for from ?.10 to $50 a pound. The leaves reached Russia In 1018 and ar rived In America In 1050. Accounting for Stuhblo **Why does Stubble sit around all day and never do any work?" "When he wns a hoy his teacher admonished her pupils: 'When In doubt, don't'-- and Stubble being nl ways In- doubt, Just don't I" ? 1 ? , ? ? " " ' Indistinct Memge That \ Had Daddy "Sitting Up" An Indianapolis man was accus tomed to receiving a telephone call from bis ten-year-old son each after noon. The call came as usual on a^ recent day. ' # "Hello, son, how Is everything at home?" he began. , ' The reply was Indistinct, but sounded as If the boy bad said: "Mummy's bad sick." Startled, the man held the receiver more tightly. "She is? What's thje matter with her?" ,v **I don't know. She only ate half a carrot and now she's eating grass." This information was more star tling' than ever. The man had suddeD visions of his wife having lost her mind and parading through the yard, gnawing at grass. "Listen, son, talk louder. Did you say mother was sick?" "Naw," came the disgusted reply, "qot mother ? bunny." ? Indiana polls News. DUcouragiag tha Kicker The mechanical farrier has ap peared In the western states of Amer ica for the handling of vicious steeds brought in to be shod. The animal Is placed In a rugged wooden frame and haltered there. A sling operated with a winch and rope cable then lifts the horse until his feet barely touch the floor. In this position the outlaw Is practically helpless and much of the fight already taken out of hltn. A metnl clnmp ntnched to n pipe arm Is then fastened around the fetlock of the hoof to be shod, and by means of gears controlling the movement of the arm, the foot Is raised to the position desired. In th? Family Cap ? Did you get his number? Victim ? No-no J Cop (to himself) ? Saints be praised I Twbb my brother Mike in th* car ! ? Brooklyn Eagle. Her Shortcoming "I can't get along with my wife. All she does is ignore me." "Ignore you?" "Yes. And if there's anything I hate, it's Ignorance." MercolizedWax Keeps Skin Young a?t ea eenee eed ?w s? dirwtwl . Fine pertlelee e# e*wl skin ixil oS unill *11 defoolo *uoh mm pimples, lire* w>u. UB mod freokla* dluppur. Bkln U tK?a sols Md Telrety. Your ItM look* ntrtnoi*. H?nollii< *11 brU?a oat tte hiddaa bitaly of your skin. Te M WrlnklM UN OM UUflM Fowdorod Buolit* rred la o?? hi If pU> wifrsfc b?? 1. il dru? Mora. Girls ll*ve Pun, tell your own and friends fortune*. Horoscope and full directions with Kuaranteed beautlfler and ihampoo. Bend birt h date and 11. A. Lee. Bos SJ8. Sturgeon. Pa. BOOK OF TEN ONC8CAL RECIPES. Mc. Book of little dinner*. 60c. Formulas of any kind. He. J. KELLY. 6 53 DIMS BANK BUILDING. DBTHOIT. MICHIOAN. THE WAY TO KEEP BUSINESS GOING BETTEK. send for "Your Task and Our Task." It's free. Writ# Chamber of Com merce, Midas, Nevada. Halcemcn sell merchants Aluminum Cam* palcn Emblei.is for Automobiles. Write for namplen and Information on other Items. HANOVEK SALES CO.. HANOVER. PA. t? PROPERTY OWNERS TODAY a letter came to my desk that deeply impressed me. It was written by a woman ? the mother in a typical American family. Her little home had been saved from foreclosure by a coat of new paint, for which a part of their meager savings had been paid. Those few gallons of fresh paint had so revived the appearance and enhanced the value of the property that the mortgagee had consented to renew the loan . . . and the little home was saved. I could not help thinking of the thousands of homes and buildings that are shabby and unattractive today due to several years of neglected painting; of the millions of home owners who, because of reduced incomes and enforced economy, have been obliged to sacrifice painting for taxes, in terest, assessments, to say nothing of food, clothing, heat and other essentials of com fort and health. You have seen these paint-starved houses and buildings, as have I. They are every where about you. Perhaps your home is included. Do you understand what they signify? Do you realize what will happen to wood or metal that is literally naked of paint if these houses and buildings face the attack of another season of rain, snow, ice, and frost? Never in the history of our country has the situation been paralleled. Property owners face an added burden of expense amounting to millions of dollars for repairs and replacements next spring. And the crisis, in my opinion, will be reached this coming winter when paint of four, five, and even six years exposure to the weather will be unable to resist the elements ? when badly weathered wood and metal will be easy prey for rot, rust and decay. T oday the big question facing thousands of property owners is plain. It is " paint or pay . " Either you must invest a little this fall in new paint or you must take the risk of paying many times the cost of paint to repair the damage done by rot, rust and decay this winter. Even at the sacrifice of other things, have your house or buildings completely repainted now. No investment you can make will pay better dividends. And nothing you can buy will make you and your family feel so uplifted and cheerful. If you cannot arrange to do a complete repaint ing job now, at least give the badly weathered places a coat or two of protecting paint . Look especially, to the window sills, thresh olds, outdoor porches and steps; the joints of porch railings and palings; the bases of pillars; the edges of eaves; the roof; the gutters and down spouts. These are the vital spots where water lodges ? where ice and frost settle ? where rot and rust attack first. A few dollars' worth of good paint, applied now, will protect these vital spots ? will tide you over this crucial winter. And it will probably save you a much greater expense for repairs and replacements next spring and summer. Under existing conditions, you may be tempted to buy a cheap paint because of its low price. I hope you will not make this costly mistake. Even on sound lumber, inferior paint is a goor bargain. But on weathered wood, which is very porous, such paint is worse than useless. It gives you a false feeling of security and leaves you without protection. Prices of well-known, established brands of paint are now the lowest in fifteen years. Enough good, dependable paint can be purchased for a few dollars to protect all the badly weathered surfaces on your building. Again I repeat, do a complete job this fall if you can. But at least do the vital exposed places before it is 44 too late.*' PrtiUtHt TUB HHHRWIN W1I.I.IAMH CO. This message to the property owners of America is spon sored by the following paint manufacturers and their dealers: t ACME WHITE LEAD AND COLOR WORKS DETROIT WHITE LEAD WORKS W. W. LAWRENCE A CO. w LINCOLN PAINT & COLOR CO. THE LOWE BROTHERS CO. JOHN LUCAS & CO., INC. THE MARTIN -SENOUR CO. PENINSULAR PAINT A VARNISH CO. THE SHERWIN-WILLIAMS CO. \