University of South Carolina Libraries
tumorous department. JOKING WITH A JOKER. fi Jones was watering bis grass when H Robinson, the funny man, came along | and stepped on the bose. Jones turn- it ed around to see what bad shut off the | water so suddenly, and Robinson stood hs and laughed at him. 0f "Get off that hose!" exclaimed the | gardener. 8U "Oh, don't mind me," said the fun- t0 ny man. "Go on and water your grass." * Then he noticed that the nozzle was carelessly pointed in his direction. m' "Here ! Point that the other way !" 1 he cried. 13 Jones glanced down at the nozzle, OE and his face lighted up with pleasure. I "Amusing to shut off a man's water, Gi isn't it ?" he asked. th "But, my dear sir," expostulated | Robinson, "I didn't " so ILTmtAnoaln " coirl TnnOQ 11 O llibcugvij tuuujf >JUIV? V VMW J VU "you'd better get off that hose." I "But I can't," said the funny man. ac "Don't you see the nozzle pointed m right at me ? And if I do " I "Oh, well, I'm in no hurry," inter- ^ rupted Jones. "If you enjoy it, I ^ don't know that I have any reason to object." * He leaned easily against the wall, still keeping the nozzle pointed toward c 1 Robinson. * "I say," said the latter, "if you'll PD turn that the other way, I'll get off." 1Di "Oh, I wouldn't put you to so much ac trouble. Enjoy yourself." I Jones held the nozzle between his an knees while he took out a cigar and lo' lighted it. The funny man watched se him puff for a moment; then he said : f "Look here, old man, my leg's get- $5 ting stiff." " sa "Why don't you shift legs?" asked ca Jones, disinterestedly. m< Robinson tried it, made a slip, and j the stream almost reached him before rei he could get his foot on the hose again, th Jones chuckled. W( "I'll smash you for this 1" cried the an funny man, excitedly. g "All right," returned the other, aQ carelessly. "But be careful, or you e may slip off the hose again." fjj Robinson tried to walk along the hose to get farther away from the nozzle, but the water spurted out a little . with each step, and he stopped. Then W1 he got desperate, stepped off, and star- ex ted to run. The stream caught him Wl in the middle of the back. When he ca got out of range he turned and shook * his fist at the impassive Jones and m( made some terrible threats. And Jones muttered, as he began watering the grass again: "e "Funny that a funny man can't take f a joke I" ' ca . as! "Now Kiss Me."?A funny incident "I occurred in a neighboring city, says an vi< exchange, a few day since, and one too f - ? J * t. ? 1 ?.~4 /~\? r. ?r rtftl AKkq f A/3 Tn guuu l/U UK lusii. uuc ui VUI uvicuiovvu ou composers has written a song enti- ag tied, "Kiss Me." A very pretty, blush- te< ing maid, having beard of the song, an and thinking she would get it with g some others, stepped into amusicstore mi to make a purchase. One of the clerks, SCJ a modest man, stepped up to wait on tr{ her. The young lady threw back her 0f veil, saying : , "I wan't 'Rock Me to Sleep.' " be The clerk got the song and put it be- jn fore her. be "Now," said the young lady, "I W( want 'The Wandering Refugee.' " a "Yes,.ma'am,"said the clerk, bowing, and in a few minutes he produced the ? "Refugee." SD "Now, 'Kiss Me,'" said the young J?, lady, of course meaning the song above mentioned. Wl ? * ' ? - .1 /* _1 ft The poor ciers s eyes poppea nre ai- most, as he looked at the young lady P? in utter astonishment, for he was not aware that a song by that name had t0 been published. J? "Wh?what did you say, miss ?" "? " 'Kiss me,'" said she. ? "I can't do it; I never kissed a young lady in my life," said the clerk, Ju And about that time a veil dropped, ye a young lady left in a hurry, clerk felt nu sick, and dealer lost sale of his music. ^ I 'TWAS a Cinch Bet.?They laugh- th< ed right merrily at him. tu "Aud so," they said, "she promised ha to be your wife if Bryan was elected ?" m< The news of the bet had just come thi to them. re "It is true," he replied. g "Poor fool!" they continued. "She st? was just haviug fun with you." sa, "Perhaps," he answered ; "but you frc haven't noticed me weeping any veiy pj bitter tears, have you ? I'm satished." p0 "You didn't want her. then ?" ?a "Well, I'm satisfied that she should at win the bet." ^ "What does she win?" they inquired* Sh "Me," he answered, with considera- a( ble satisfaction. "I was to be her hus- fefj band if McKinley won, and she was ut to be my wife if Bryan proved victori- Qf ous. Perhaps some of you gentlemen mj can give me lessons in the art of betting, but I don't believe it." ? And there was a general disposition ' to agree with him. J Couldn't Stand Prosperity.?"Are tl1 your parents living?" an Arkansaw a school teacher asked of a boy. ru "Mur is, but pap ain't." ? "That's bad." Pp "What's bad? That mur's livin'or d'? that pap's dead ?" m? "It's bad that your father is dead?" "Yas ; the man that had a mortgage |01 on the crap said so." in "What was the matter with your S father ?" pi' "He couldn't stand prosperity." \vl "Why, how did prosperity kill him ?" tic "Wal, old Bill Simmons giv' pap a H( whole jug o' whisky, an' it was mor'n co he could stan'. He done his best, but ro< Bhe downed him." gii gST A young lady who was blamed cii for allowing her glove to be discovered sei in a young man's pocket stated that an she had no hand in it. de ? -Wayside ?nthmngs. fe?" Twelve letters comprise the 1 awaiian alphabet. ' 8F A dollar is respectable because represents somebody's bard work. Teacher?how many months e tve 28 days in them ? Tommy?All v 'em. , b W Over 1,250,000 acres of the earth's , rface is devoted to the cultivation of bacco. W Marrying into a family does not rry with it the right to criticize its 1 embers. 8 6T It has been stated that a murder ' committed id Italy every iwo aours i the average. a Fully one-third of the land in d reat Britain is owned by members of a e house of lords. t Anthracite coal, from China, is ' Id in California, und is crowding out 1 e Pennsylvania product. &" Wisconsin has 2,000 creameries, c id produces one-sixth of the cheese c ade in the United States. f 6T Saturn is 906,000,000 miles from e sun, and it takes nearly 30 years complete its revolution. j 6T When terrified, the ostrich trav- t 5 at the rate of 25 miles an hour, and' e 3ars 12 to 14 feet at a stride. j, 6T" George Washington's plantation 0 i the Potomac river, south of Washgton city, originally contained 8,000 fc res. d 6T If thou woulds't find much favor a d peace with God and man, be very v w in thine own eyes. Forgive thy- J If little and others much. ii ST A lady in Bath, Maine, carried g 6 in her stocking, deemiDg that a v fe place. While running for a street y r, her garter broke, and she lost the 9 sney. v &" The Lord made the world and 3ted; he made man and rested, and * 1 - - ? ?. anil O t. CD au mauc a uiiab^&c?auu umuv ? )man. Since then nobody has bad ? y rest. f Spain bas more sunshine than j y other country in Europe. The arly average in Spain is 3,000 hours ; at of Italy, 2,300; Germany, 1,700; . igland, 1,400. gl When a real New York boy sbes to say that a man is extremely 8 travagant, be expresses himself this ly : "He has money to burn, and u rries matches." n Of the 64 who graduated in jdicine recently, from the University d Buffalo, three were women, two of 0 em being in the honor roll and one Q ading the list. A Negro preacher who has been n rrying on a protracted meeting, was si ked how he got on with the meeting, tl ^irst rate," said he ; "I made 70 con- e 3ts the first night." Lulu and Flossie Sleppy, of St. y seph county, Michigan, are sisters, o ed, respectively, sixteen and fourm years. Lula weighs 435 pounds, a d her sister 425 pounds. h &T In Brazil at the funeral of an un- ^ irried woman, the mourning color is irlet. The coffin, the hearse, the w ippings of the horses, and the livery v the driver, are all scarlet. P &T In York county, Me., is said to h a tree that grew up through the hole ^ the centre of a grindstone, and now ars the stone aloft, hanging, as it ;re, about the neck of the tree. . 6T When Morocco's sultan decides g] marry, the whole country becomes ^ rouded in gloom, as every subject 0 ast contribute a wedding present. a le sultan is about to take a second ^ fe, and much discontent is reported. ST" Bigamists in Hungary are com- ft lied to submit to an odd punishment. Q le man who has been silly enough a marry two wives is legally forced a live with both of them, in the same p use. si ST" The war with Mexico com- fi ;nced April 24, 1846, and ended ly 4, 1848, haviug continued two a ars, two months and ten days. The e; mber of United States troops en- tl ged was 112,230. h The home of Mrs. Mary Lease, ft e noted populist politician and lecrer, will be sold under the sheriff's y miner, January 6, to satisfy a $1,100 jrtgage. If the money is paid before a at time, the house, of course, will be -leased. ST Three policemen in a Brooklyn * ition-house had a quarrel about a a tidwicb, which one of them stole j* n >m another, and surreptitou9ly ate. " sts and clubs were freely used. The 11 lice commissioner 6ned each of them t( 0. They want no more sandwiches that price. ?| An untamed swallow, which had nest in a farm near Chetwind, in ropshire, was caught and taken in , :age to London, where it was releas- ? . It returned to its nest in 80 mines, having accomplished a distance 145 miles at the rate of nearly two les a minute. SF" "Well," remarked the wife of p e man who had changed his mind e| out going to congress, "you have a a ;ar conscience, anyhow." "I know at," was the comfortless reply, "but clear conscience isn't what I was p uning for." ST" Gallium is worth $100,000 a d und. It is a silver-white hard metal ai scoverea in 1010. it is sumcwuai u illeable and capable of receiving a d e polish. It is remarkable for its B v melting point, melting when held o: the fingers. T ST" Of all women she is most to be si ;ied who has a hesitating admirer, V 10 boggles about popping the ques- ai >n. He is worse than a bold one. iw perfectly satisfactory was the v nduct of that brave old Puritan, who tie up to the door of the house of the ti :1 of his choice and having desired her be called out to him, said without li cumlocution, "Rachel, the Lord hath at me to marry thee!" when the girl tl swered, with equal promptitude and b voutness, "The Lord's will be done 1" b! She jjfomj ?tiler. rHE WRECKER S REVENGE. Id the '60s many parts of Australia, ven near to the towns, were in a very vild state. Railways had not long teen established there, and as they vere mostly used for conveying the ;old from the mines and the men who tad made their piles to the nearest arge towns, it is not to be wondered it that many attempts were made by vild characters to wreck the trains. It got to be altogether too common t thing on our line for these desperaloes to put sleepers across the track .nd tear up the rails to throw the rain off, and some of the villians who vere caught got pretty severe sen ences. It so happened that in an especially loteworthy case it was my evidence ibiefly that convicted two of the most ?recious rascals that ever lived?Tom 'ackson and Jack Parker by name. Tbey were sent to prison for 15 ears, and I was glad to serve as an 'humble instrument" in the case; hough sometimes I did feel rather unasy wheq I'd repeat to myself the ast words Parker said as he was taken ut of court: "As for you, Joe Townsend," and le shook his fist significantly in my lirection, "all this comes of the cowrdly lies you've sworn to; and I k'ant you to understand that Tom ackson and me ain't the men to stay a prison for 15 years. We're goin' to it out, and you may depend upon it /e'll be keerful to pay our respec's to ou. We've invented a new kind of leeper to throw trains off the track nth, eh, Tom ?" He leered horribly to his crony, as hey passed through the door, and as he prisons in those days were not so ifficult to get out of as they are now, could not, as I have said, help feel ]g a trifle nervous when I recalled 'arker's threat. I turned the words over in my mind good many times during the next wo years. Somehow or other they tuck by me: "We've invented a new kind of leeper to throw a train off the track." I felt as though he meant something nusual by that, although I could not lake out what. My house, where my wife and cbilren liVed, wa3 about three-quarters f a mile below the station, and quite ear the track. At 10.30 I was at liberty for the i ight, and it didn't take me long to hut up the station and start off down he road for home; and a lonely < nougb tramp it was. Well, the night I am going to tell ou about was as black as the inside i f a tunnel. When I started down the track, I lmost wished I'd gone around by the ighway, for I had to feel my way alf the time. However, I knew the path tolerable i rell, and could tell where all the culerts and dangerous places were, i retty nearly. 1 So I held up my lantern like the eadlight of a locomotive and stumled along, making pretty good time, < n the whole. I must have been about half-way ome, when all at once, without the < lightest idea on my part that any I uman being was within half a mile i f me, I felt a pair of arms clasped 1 round my waist with a strength it ras impossible to overcome. 1 Then I was thrown down, the light om a more powerful lantern than i line fwhich had fallen from my hand nd become extinguished) dashed I bout me, and by its glare I saw three i owerful fellows, who, in spite of my iruggles, proceeded to tie my hands I rmly behind me. < I.did not recognize them at all till, I t length, as I lay there on my back, 1 ntirely helpless, one of them snatched ae lantern from his companion and < eld it near me, while he brought his 1 ice close to mine. "Well, Joe Townsend," he said, "do ou know me?" i "Yes, I know you, Jack Parker," I I nswered, as coolly as I could. I "I thought as how mebbe ye would. 1 didn't mean to stay in prison long. I 've b'en thinkin' 'bout you, Joe,'most I 11 the time while I was there gittin' i p my muscle breakin' stone. And i ere's anuther feller you might recolember?leastways, he hain't forgot- J m you, eh, Tom ?" I And I now recognized Tom Jack- I >n, the other prisoner of two years i efore. The third man I had never seen. < "This place'll do as well as any, I pose," Parker went on, presently. 1 What's the time, Jem ?" Jem consulted his watch, and proounced it to be about 11. 1 "All right; he'll have jist about 50 linutes to tbink things over and re- i ent having lied about two such ex- 1 mplary gentlemen as Tom Jackson nd myself?eh, Tom ?" And Tom chuckled approvingly. "Now git out all of them ropes," { urker went on. "Do ye know what we're goin' ter r o with yer, Joe?" he added. "We in't goin' ter throw no trains off the ( ack. Oh, no! Tom and me wouldn't 1 0 nothin' of that kind, eh, Tom ? I ut we're goin' to let you throw one QT. I told ye, ye know, that me and 1 'om had diskivered a new kind of eeper for throwin' trains with, t i^e're jest goin' to tie you down here t cross the track awhile, that's all." j So their fiendish purpose was reealed at last. 1 They were going to tie me to the 1 ack and let the train pass over me. 1 confess that at that moment my < mbs shook with fear. It was not only death within less j lan half an hour that I was to suffer, ut death in a most violent and horri- 1 le form. t For a moment I thought only of myself. c Then I groaned aloud as I remem- t bered Jennie and the little ones. , I don't know why I should be t ashamed to tell it?I doubt if there t are many men who would not have done the same in my place?but I struggled to my knees and begged 8 those heartless villians to forego their desperate purpose. c I might as well have gone on my a knees to the great iron monster that would be along in so short a time to c crush me. 1 They only laughed mockingly over t my despair, and began their work. c You'll acknowledge that it's rather a dismal prospect for a poor fellow to ? be gagged and bound, aud then tied fast across a railway track, with his neck across one rail and his feet over the other, and to know that in half an hour a train is coming down that very track; and this in a dark, drizzly Dight, and in a lonely spot where no . human .being is at all likely to find him. And that's the way the scoundrels left me?they tied me there fast and firm?they mockingly bade me goodnight and pleasant dreams. And yet I could not cry out in my agony nor curse them in my desperation as they- moved otf. No words of mine can describe the horror and agony I felt during the time I lay there. There I was, in a most painful position, bound by the neck to one rail, and by the ankles to the other, my hands tied beneath me, and my body fastened to a sleeper.. Oh, Heaven ! how I did struggle to free myself! how I sought to wrench away my legs; how I tugged at the cords which bound my wrists; and then, since I could not get them free, " as I thought of the fearful death so soon to come upon me, how I strove to throttle myself with the rope that held my head to the rail! How I prayed that I might suffocate there as I lay! I have heard that men have died of terror, but I don't believe it. If such a thing were possible, I think I should have perished in those ^ dreadful moments. ^ But I did not. Oh, no ! The murderers were have their fullest revenge. And now, suddenly, I grew strangely calm. I philosophized with myself. I said, resignedly, that a man could die but once; and, after all, what would it matter an hour hence? Besides, in reality, this was an in- 1 stantaneous and almost painless end. 8l But my wife and children ! Oh, I Jjj would like to live for them. And ti could I not? I was not dead yet. ^ If I could only move myself a few ti feet! Oh, so very few feet! Yet I 11 could not stir. a Now a thought struck me. Could I not signal the train in some a* way, stop it before it passed over me ? P Alas, how ? They would never ? hear my cries. They would never " see me in the darkness. a No one would know until the mor* v * !?/?? T nk AIIM KO QIqc I < IUWj auu tucu I OUVUIU UV} UlUg ]( crushed, mangled, dead ! ? But my lantern ! where was that? h I turned my head slightly, and A could just see it a few feet away, ? where I had dropped it. h If I only had it on my breast, I s could draw up my pocket with my teeth, I thought, and somehow get a match from .it and so light the u lantern. ^ But all this time the minutes were v flying by like lightning. ^ Horrible as that hour was to me, I w could have wished it was all eternity. ? Every instant I dreaded to hear the n train coming. I knew it must be well nigh time for it now. p I will not dwell longer on my suf- ? Ferings. I did not free myself. I t could not, if the salvation of the race bad depended on it. Nor did any- ii oody come to free me. * No one would ever pass that spot - ?! ?t- i- 1:1- - .1 or. J LI U IJIgUl ilftu luui, auu at ou^u uu bour. Nor was the train behind time. n No, I heard it at last; first, a faint, ^ rumbling sound that seemed to come v from deep down in the earth ; then * ihe ground seemed to thrill and trem- cl Die ; then the rails rattled a little, ^ iben more and more; then I heard 'he whistle, and then, oh, Heaven ! mother minute and it would be upon me! ? I tried once more to cry out; I o struggled again for an instant with all * ;he power of my being; then I felt :hat my time was come, and I shut my eyes and lay quite still. And the great train came rushing jn and on?it was close upon me. v I saw it not, yet I felt it to be direct- J; y above me. P Great heavens! what was this? * Was it passing over me, and I still iving and feeling it not ? w I opened my eyes ; I saw the carriages G lashing by above, and within a few ? eet of my head. si Then the truth flashed upon me. Jj] The train was upon the other track. st The reaction was too much for me, ind I fainted. e< When I came to, I found myself in ?t ny room at home. I had only a confused recollection )f the events which had so lately beallen me, but they told me gently all p hat I did not know of the story. M I had been very ill, they said, of p )rain fever. ,r They had found me on "the morning )f that terrible night, bound fast?not C ,o the railway tracks, but to a tree, ust a few rods from the track. I was very delirious, and was taken lome raving continually, and I had jeen ill for a fortnight. jS Then they asked how it was that I T< ;ame to be tied to the tree. 01 Rut. alas! I knew as little of that 1 >art of the story as they did. I told them how I had been seized )y Parker and his companions, and ,ied to the track. My lantern, found near the spot, and listinct marks of a struggle, confirmed he story. The question was. how did I escape he train, and bow did I become tied o the tree. My theory is this: Parker and Jackson were not,' after l11, so bad as I took them to be. Their revenge had been, not to murler me, but to frighten me terribly, ind they certainly had succeeded. I could see nothing, tied as I was, lould hardly move my bead, and they >ad easily persuaded me into the idea hat I was on the down track?that >f the passenger train. After the train had passed they had BIG PAY-LI HERE ARE SOM OFFERS TC \I amItttiII A lUIKVUIC FOR Valuable Premiums i Who Send in am BUGGY, 2-HORSE B Special Inducement! IV avtt wci new isuifsun Inducements scribers to READ CAREFULLY AND BETWEEN this date and the MIDDLE OF MARCH, It Is usual for the people of this ection to select their reading matter for the blowing year. Being one of the cleanest, lost, enterprising and reliable newspapers In tie state, It Is natural, therefore, tnat THE 'ORKVILLE ENQUIRER should also be ne of the mftst popular. Ninety per cent, of lie families In the county desire It as a regu-1 ir visitor to their homes, and all those who an afford It, may reasonably be looked upon s probable subscribers. One of the most selous drawbacks, probably, is the Inconvenmce of writing letters, sending money and ttendlng to the matter of subscribing at the roper time. It is this fact that makes It esecfally desirable for us, Just at this time, to scure the services of a large number of intelgent and energetic assistants, and to make it orth their while to give the matter their ttentlon, we are making the liberal offers rhich we will presently explain. The price of a single subscription one year s TWO DOLLARS. This is to the individual rho does not give his name to a clubmaker; ut sends it direct to this office. In clubs, owever, the price is only ONE DOLLAR .ND SEVENTY-FIVE CENTS. That is the rice which the subscriber pays the clubmaker, nd the price which, under all circumstances, oisATwctwi to nnv us. Now to our dtodo Itlons: THREE BIG PREMIUMS. This year we offer three big premiums. One i a .SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLAR BUGGY. , not her Is a SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLAR ORrAN. and the third is a FIFTY DOLLAR TAG( >N. The Buggy will go to the clubmaker 'ho gets up the largest list of subscribers, new nd old. The Wagon will go to the clubmaker ho gets up the second largest list, new and Id; and the Organ will go to the clubmaker hose total list shall show up the largest umber of NEW NAMES. Theorgan contest, owever, will be separate and distinct from tie other contest, in that the winner of this remlum will still have the right to count his ntlro club. Including both old and new ames, in the contest for the Buggy or Wagon. 0 be more explicit. It Is possible that the lubmaker who gets the Organ, may also be he winner of either the Wagon or the Buggy. 1 is also possible that the Organ may be won it h less thnn 30 names, together with one f the smaller premiums. FULL PREMIUM LIST. But this is not all. In addition to the preliums offered for the LARGEST ANDSECND LARGEST CLUBS, and the largest club f NEW SUBSCRIBERS, we also offer other aluable premiums for a given number of subbribers. This, it will be seen, ensures that the lubmaker who starts out for one of the larger lubs and (tills short, will not fall to be paid >r his time and trouble. Here is the list in ill, followed by the conditions below: $75.00 BUGGY. To the clubmaker who returns the largest umber of names, will be awarded the BEST UGGY manufactured Dy ine uakolina m;uy Company of Yorkville, S. C., for $75.00. he Buggy may be taken out of stock or lanufactured to order at the option of the nccessful Clubmaker. $50.00 WAGON. To the clubmaker who returns the second trgest number of names will be awarded a t'HITE HICKORY TWO HORSE WAGON, alued at ?50. The wagon is the equal in rery respect of any other to be bought at the rice named. 75.00 "LA BELLE" ORGAN. For the largest club of NEW SUBSCRIBERS e will give one WILCOX A WHITE ORAN. known as "La Belle." and worth $75.00. his Is the same instrument that is being sold y Mr. Geo. T. Schorh, and which is giving ich perfect satisfaction to all who have purmsed it. It has five octaves, two complete ;ts of reeds and octave couplers, and nine ops. The case is of black walnut, ornaraent1 with bevel plate mirror, and in tone, worklanship and durability, the instrument is inul to any reed organ ever sold on this maret. With the organ will go a handsome ool, for which there will be no charge. For 60 Subscribers, We will give the clubmaker his choice of the Bowing premiums, each valued at $25: A OUR DRAWER "ENQUIRER" SEWING [ACHINE, together with all.attachments ; "HOUSEKEEPERS SET OF KNIVES. ORKS AND SPOONS made by Rogers; a 1VALTHAM" WATCH in coin sllver.dust roof case; a NO. 6 AUTOHARP, a BANJO, UITAH. MANDOLIN, VIOLIN, or Ebor Bb ORNET. T/v-m Ad nnj T nan Til n n CA i' Ui IV anu ucoo niau vy CBSCRIBERS, we will give the clubroaker Is choice of the following, each valued at S15: , rALTHAM WATCH, in open face silver ise; set of hall dozen ROGERS BROS'. NIVES and FORKS Oil PIECES); NO. 4 AUDHARP, BANJO. MANDOLIN. GUITAR, LOW ARM SINGERSEWING MACHINE. VST Our Propositions are Open to For further information, address L. M. GRIST Yorkville, S. C., November 2,1896. * come to release me before the up train should be due. They had fastened me to the tree so as to get fully away before I could give any alarm. This is the only way that I can account for the facts. And though I certainly don't owe the rascals anything for what they did to me, I never think of the affair without feeling a kind of gratitude toward them, and thanking Heaven they were not as j black-hearted as I thought they were. I6T "Bobby, was papa pleased when yon told him that graudma was here ?" I "I guess so; he said 'gee-whiz J" TTLEWORK. E LIBERAL CLUBMAKERS. Enquirer 1897. to Be Given to Those (1 Pay for Names. ????? * r AftAW APBAV T?Tf! xm.VA Vii5 uiv# 4 s For Clubmakers to bers and Special for New SubSubscribe. $ GO TO WORK TODAY. For 30 and Less Than 40 SUBSCRIBERS, choice of the following, each valued at 810: NEW YORK STANDARD 7-JEWELED WATCH in dust proof case; 14K GOLD FILLED WATCH CHAIN, HALF DOZEN TEASPOONS, HALF DOZEN TABLE SPOONS and BUTTER KNIFE (13 pieces); or an EXTRA FINE ACCORDEON. For 20 and Less Than 30 SUBSCRIBERS, we will give a NO. 2% AUTOHARP, valued at 87.50; or THE ENQUIRER and any monthy magazine or weekly , newspaper published in the United States, for one year. For 10 and Less Than 20 SUBSCRIBERS, a CONCAVE WARRANTED RAZOR, 8ILVER PLATED GRAVY LADLE, or an extra quality FOUR BLADED POCKET KNIFE, with name and address on the handle. Any of the articles mentioned would be a bargain at 82. For 6 and Less Than 10 SUBSCRIBERS, an extra quality THREE BLADED POCKET KNIFE, GENUINE FRENCH BRIAR PIPE or CHILD'S SILVER PLATED TABLE SET. Good values at $1.50. For 3 and Less Than 6 SUBSCRIBERS, "Siren" pattern BUTTER KNIFE, or 2-BLADED POCKET KNIFE, with name and address on the handle. And to Each Old Subscriber, The Yorkvtlle Enquirer?TWICE-AWEEK?filled with bright, fresh news from the COUNTY, STATE, NATION AND WORLD, Interesting stories, Instructive miscellaneous matters, and humorous selections, explanatory editorials, etc. The paper will be held up to its present high standard, and will continue prompt, explicit, reliable, and, In short, the Dest. To Each New Subscriber. The same as above except that if the paper Is COMMENCED NOW, IT WILL BE SENT UNTIL JANUARY 1. 1898, without any charge for that portion of the time between now and January 1, 1897. It Is understood, however, that If the subscriber falls to par the clubmpker the subscription price, he will be due him for all papers that he may have received. By new subscribers we mean those whose names were not on OUR BOOKS ON OCTOBER 1st, 1806, except we will not count as new subscribers, cases where the subscription mav have been chanced from the name of one member of a family to another. This is intended emphatically to mean new additions to our subscription list. > Note the Conditions. TWO SIX MONTHS SUBSCRIBERS at 81 each, will be considered the equivalent of one yearly subscriber at 81.75 and so counted. A , subscription paid for two or more years In advance at 81.75, will be counted as one name for each year so paid. Clubmakers will be held personally responsible for the payment of all names returned by them. After a clubmaker has returned and paid fo'r any name, he can, at anytime there- -y, after, discontinue the sending of the paper to the person for whom he has paid, and transfer tne unexpired time to any other person, provided the person to whom the transfer is desired was not a subscriber at the time the original name was entered on our books. No name will be counted in competition for a premium until the subscription price has been paid; nor will any premium be delivered until a satisfactory settlement has been made for all names returned by the clubmaker. Persons who commence making clubs will >< not be permitted to transfer their club to another clubmaker's list after the names have been entered on our books. It is not necessary that the names on a club should all be at the same postofflce. Names may be taken at any number of places. Clubmakers are requested to send in names as rapidly as they secure them after November 1,1806. All subscriptions must be forwarded to us at the expense of those sending them. We will be responsible for the safe transmission of money only when sent by draft, registered letter or money order drawn on the Yorkviue postomce. In sending names, write plainly, and give postoffice, county and state. All subscriptions will be discontinued at the expiration or the time paid for. A separate list will be kept for each clubmaker, who will be credited with each name sent, so that the number sent by any one person may be ascertained at a moment's notice. In case of a tie for either premium, two weeks will be allowed in which to ''untie" The time in which names may be returned under our propositions will commence now, 1st day of November, 1806, and expire at 4 o'clock, p. in., on Wednesday, the 10th day of March, 1897. Everybody. Go to Work Now! 1 & SONS, Yorkville, S. C. *