University of South Carolina Libraries
f IE WEEKLY iH UHIOH TIMES. gci'Otrd lo ^grirullurt, gjorliniUure, Jlomcslit Gkonomg, f)olitr JTilcraturr, politics, and flir (Turrcnt Oleics of the gaj). VOL. XVII.?New Skhies. UNION C. II., SOUTH CAROLINA, FKUKUAUV 12,1880.. NUMBER 0 School Commissioner's Report mit Tim M VU 1^.^ I AM) I ii Ji'MSVII.I.i:?NO. 1. S. W . Talley $ oC (Hi W. It. Lemons 84 (H) T. 1). llcynohls M <H) B. J. Foster 48 (H> A. (!. White 52 50 It. T. Foster 35 00 Miss It. A. Carlisle 52 25 Miss Anna Hhineliart if) On Miss Nannie I". (Liutclock SO 25 Mrs. M. A. Mitchell 40 00 Miss 11 at tic K. Wooil 8-1 00 K. J. Foster 21 00 F. It. .Scott 25 (Hi ML... I* * ' .?i ip* i/tir.i lltllOCK l'i I'il Renjamin Kennedy 1 'Jo (H> T L. Haines !- '> 00 Wm. Webster inot paid l>y Treasurer)... - ">0 Total $9*0 ot? l>l\ A VT<> X V I I.I.K ? SO. 'J. II. F. Foster $ 40 00 Miss Kiln Wood 10 t'O .1. L. Alexander ^0 <H> .1. W. Spears 00 tut Miss Ollio II. Waynes 00 00 Miss 1'. Carrie Williams do 00 R. C. Sarratt 1'Jo 00 Miss lint tic L. Campbell... 40 00 II. A. Stewart .VJ .">(? Miss .lane l'ryor "(I Op II. R. Tate 00 00 J. CJ. Spencer l'JO 'Ml N. (1. Liltlcjohn 10 00 Total *SO? 6<> oownr.vsvii.i.F.?no. '>. Miss Leah Tessicr S JJ .*i0 Mrs. Mary A. Lcne M '?" .1. C. Moorehcad " J "0 J. A. Lindsay 7;! (Mi C. I',. Spears 7o 00 Jatncs Ij. Strain 7A (M> Miss Ma White 10 <mi Klijali I'.eil 7A DO M. D. Muuly AO W. II. Spears 77 7 A Miss r.tnnta Kcmlrick AO (Ml Miss Kate McOowan "'0 0< Jaiucs I?. Walker AO Oil Dusky Hamilton -A 00 Alice Littlejohn AO ini Klvira I.itllcjoiin IS 7A J. A. Campbell A7 AO Mi?? llacliacl Macotnson 7A CO Miss Nannie C. Kemlrick -7 AO Miss Alice D. McCullouglt 7A 00 Miss Hi I'.. Tucker 2A (Hi F. W. I.itllcjohn '-'A 00 K. C. l'atrick Si Total rl 1A7 00 I I Sl'KVKV- NO. 1. .1. .1. Kinar.l son 00 C. l'. Dogan I" "0 C. II. Jones 00 (Mi J. (!. l>ailey As AO \V. D. Demons '0 M 11. II. Co-ter 00 (Ml J. I). Dai lev 'JO 00 C. M. Mcl\i?sick ^1 Oil A . (W liitc 0 iO Miss M. I'. Iinriingion CO M. S. FnUCCtt '.'II (HI M. I,. I.cmnster HO 4Ml Miss Auric'!, 1711 in IS 00 T. N. Koiley .Mi oO 11. M. Latimer '.'() (M) Total ?H8H 'J:'. I NIIIV ? Nit. ">. I Miss Li/./ic llreor $1"0 Miss M iry Mel'rhlc '?I 70 .1. II. Hoilgor .">0 HO C. C. Jeter 10 00 1'. I!. Nichols In oo Miss'leiiey.a Wilson OO (to J. M. Foster ".() 00 Lucy A. I.ipscy '?" no Miss Auria (1. l'.llis 'Jo no M. A. l'ruitt 1 00 OO II. L. (loss JO OO Miss Carrie Hawkins .'0 JA Miss Lorcna Hawkins 7~? 00 \\. 1>. Lemons 8 7"> Lucy Nicholas JO (Mi Total ?717 0?i "WlTO?NO. 0. Miss Sue II. Carlisle * '.'0 00 II. I' rown 'J"J Mi |i. II. F.nit HO oo .1. ti. 11:1 i 1 cy *>" l la Tucker 7 "> (Hi f. Jeter 7 "> 00 Mrs. M. ti. Humphries ! "> 00 Mis?. M. M. P?u?8el 7 "> oo Miss Mary McUriJe 1"? oO Mis? Sue IS. .Icier... 7"> 0" Mrs. I.. < . Jeter 1"0 oo Miss Auric ti. I'.llis )o 00 J,<\ Swygarl .v t'o 10 .70 .1. 0. Stephen? . ... It) -*>0 M. (. liApin I "> 00 Total ?7H 10 I .Sit IMM ?NO. 7. Merry Tucker $ 10 0?? Prusilla Tucker 00 00 Mr*. M. <i. 11 umphries. I!7 ."?0 J. i . 1*. Jeter !()."? oo Mi?i? \gnus M llicc 1(H) Od .loini ii. ii>??i r?o <mi II Krow ii 1"> (Mi Mrs. M. I.. Sinm KHi on A. 1'. Wilson !/ "? (Ml M;?r.v M M .ibly I "? (H) I. \V. .laincs !( 'mi Tot :il ")0 i;i>i.a\svim.?:?so. 8. John l>. N?riss *G0 .1. II. U Ijior U J. II. >tlllliKT iJ. 1*. Shiuuls Ill F. V. Foster I'll T. H . (in,.* *JC J. B. Lane aster I'll I.Ji\ Gee 'HI A. I.uli Walker ''U 1 Klisii Itobinson 4?? < A. 15. Smith 00 i II. (!. Johnson *'0 I W. II I.<>nions 1 I Fannie Kodgess :>0 < M. C. Novell 10 t Total ?0:iij ." < (1811 KN III I.I. - X<?. 0. William Ityrd ? ' .1. II. Thomas < *> KvaSclmppaul ?*0 t A. W. llice CO i Addi<^V. Hison Ill*' t Julia Kison "it) I Total S 11 *? ( CK'i.-S KKVS? M?. K'. John I). Norria ^ - "> C Ii. M. llicc I*? t Anna (losseit ">0 t C. 15. ltobo T"> ( W. ('. Will.uro *'0 i Sallic 1.. Hay " "> < 11. F. Kison ( Lizzie T. llrcjjrtry lot) < Jonuic ''unniugliant ,ST " II. I.. Hunter Ob 0 Total >*7"o 5 rorp.T hoi si:?so. 1 1. E. I). Uritton ?1M <7 M. K. No well r_'i> (i A. 1'. Wilson M) H J. II. Ilmwn *?7 i' J. II. Iloilger - i"' S. J. Hay li 0 II. W. Tinsloy 1 " J. K. Young ii il H. T. (.ice 1 h Francoiile Wagner 'JO 0 Itutlcr Sheldon 1" 0 B. F. Bailey 'J o Total s J'...*, *) Respectfully, W. M. Fi?>TEH. School Commissioner l.'uion County. Cauk nh' I'ltKSEttvKi) I'm;it.?Keepin fruit or any provision depends on t li re things. It must he sound to begin, speck of decay or acid change will develo ferment in a kettle of fruit. Second, th jars or cans mu-t be air-tight. The objei of steaming the fruit is to expel the air an arrest the change in the juice, which wou! naturally proceed to ferment. Air none trates in liner ways than we can iliseori and needs much less than the crevice of hair or a pin's point to enter and spoil tl coutents. tl lass that is free from cracl or air bubbles, well-glazed stoneware, Ire from Haws, yellow ware, or strong, dar earthen jars will keep the fruit from th air, provided it is sealed with wax. putt; or bladder, soaked and left to shrink on tli mouth of the jars. Cans with screw toj and rubber rings are apt to have slight dt loots which prevent perfect scaling, an cannot be depended on without wax. Third, the jars must be kept in a dr dark, cold place, very little above frcczinj A shelf in a furnace-warmed cellar or slor room opening from a kitchen, is not t! place to preserve fruit. It may he put tl in the best manner, and yet spoil throng kcnniiif* in I ho lh'hf or u-horo if is i? cool. (Ilass cans should ho wrapped in p: per, buried in sand or sawdust, or kept in dark closet. Packed with plenty of clial oats, dry sand or sawdust, or dry, siflc ashes, most preserves will stand I'rcezii weather without injury, hut each can nec< at least six inches of non-conducting mat rial about it on all sides, for protection, pit on one side of the cellar, dug below tl reach of frost, and lined with boards, wi straw or ashes between them and its wal will keep preserves from heat or frejzin A pit dug in the cellar, four feet below tl level of its floor, well drained and lined above, will prove the best place for keepii small quantities of preserves enough for single family. Tilk Aiim?ii:i>.\<. < \-i.- Atlanta, February The trial of Or. Armstrong. Kpiscopal clerg men, charged with immoral revelry and ct duel unbecoming a minister of tIte < t??pel w cmtinued before ilic Kcclesiasticnl < ourt. \*iti roootivencd this Mlernoon. The evidence now nil in and I be case will probably be de ded to morrow night as counsel have beg their arguments and evening sessions will held to hasten (he close of (lie long and di greeahle trial. No church ntlair in (Jeorgia li ever caused such a profound sensation as th and it is the topic of the hour in every hor | in the State. ? I'.orn: 1>\\. Ilaster day this year falls the 'J*?th of April, which is the latest date winch it can fall. It hns not come on this ( in over one hundred years and will not ag come later than April 'J'J until 1 Thee liest day on \vh icli Master can fall is March 1 It lias not fallen 011 that day since IMS. t will not again until after 111# year '2,0(Mi. \ ii would be all the same to any of us that yi if it fell on the 4th of July. THE MOTHER-IN-LAW. Dere vis ninny qvcer dings in dis land ofl' dcr so free -,() 1 neflor coulJ qvite understand : (M( Der peobles dliey nil seem so dcefrent to me As dhosc in my own faderland. W Dhey gctB b'enty droubles und into unships 00 Mitout dor least hit ofl' a cause ; 00 l"ud. vould you pelief id? dhosc mean Yankee [)0 chaps, Uhey lights mil dheir modcr-in-lawg. IMI ? OO Shust dink of a vhite man so vickcd as dot ! [)(l v ny not git nor olJt la>ly a show Who van it gels oup, ven tier uighdt itl vas hot. Mil mine baby, 1 shunt like to know ? !*-"? I*ml dhen in tier vintor. then Katrine vas sick, id Und der mornings vas shnowy tintl raw. |() Who made right cvay oup dot lire so tjvick ? Yhy, dot vas nunc moder-in-law. Id vas von off dliosc voman's-rights vellers I been : Where vas noting dot's mean aboudt tr.c ; Vlicn der obit lady vislies to run dot niasheen, Ml Yhy. I sliust let her run id, you see. id l'nd, vlien dot slily Yawcob was cutting srme ,, | <lricks, (A block oil' der old! chip he vas, yaw !i Kel' she goes for dot chap like some dousand M) off bricks, _ Dot's nil right ! She s mine moder-iti-law. 111 Yeck oudt und veek in. itl vas nlvnys tier same Dot voinnn vas boss off der house : hi lludt, dhen, neffer inindt I vas glatl dot she IQ came: She vas kind to mine young Yawcob Strauss. Und vhen dherc was vater to get vrotn tier spring. K) l'nd firevood to sphlit oup und saw. onv tus veicotnc to iio it. micro s not unyding I tot's too good for mine tnoder-in-law. '' ?I! o* 11 >n (it I'll". id ii EBENLZER'S SLEIGH RIDE. it) Twos in the Suite of Indiana. Farmer ? Sproggins and his wife, l.izy Ann, set out to u market quite comtorlablc-likc and snug. They were going to the town of Kattlcroot. They 0 took along with them two dozen cliiekens and (I six dozen eggs. >o This had been a great winter for sleighing in u Indiana, especially around the town of Rattleil root. 0 " Hitch libencz.er to the sleigh this morning. ii Sproggins, said Lizy \un. il Sproggins blessed 'lie signs in the almanac .j for sending such gao l wheat-growing winter 0 weather, and obeyed. ii libcnc/.cr was not a horse : lie was a mule. 0 He was white, with fair long cars, and a tail of remarkable intelligence. Over a good feed of hay libencz.er whisked his tail softly, to show his gratitude and peace. Wlion Sproggins gave j the caudal member a brisk twist, libencz.er | knew as well as his master that that meant - Git up ;M When a hoy came fooling around, there was a e j sudden upheaving of the appendage, a storm \ Mguai, as u were, in indicate tliat hereabouts wns the earthquake end of Kbenezer. Farmer Sproggins was wont to say : That there mule's got more sense in his one tail than the town council of Kattlcroot have in their heads.'' The farmer and his wife had raised their i? Kbcne/er trom a gawky, quavery-legged colt, i) Me was born the same 3'car their eldest son was, and Simon is old enough to vote for the next President. This family mule was crowned 10 with years, dignity and faithfulness. ; S , ' lie's the stidiest crcctur, hbenezeris. ' said c l.izy Ann. "Von couldn't starkle hiin no more'n k you could (Iran'ther Sproggins' family hihlc," e That market morning they sledded on over the y, snow in happiness and peace. Khcne/.er, Sproggins. Lizy Ann, tlie chickens and the eggs. At ^ the top uf l'igeon 11 ill there was a rough place. The sleigh jolted slightly. It struck the rheumatism in the oi l white lien's knees, and site gave a squawk. An egg or two croaked. Iiuddap. Kbcuezer." said Hproggins. y? Kbcuezer looked around ami winked, anil g. then he lookeil ahead. L>. l'igeon Hill was half a mile long and very steep. P.eforc the snow came, there had been to 1 a heavy rain. The ground had froze still and 'P icy. Then the heavy snow fell. i'1 Splendid bottom fur sleighin'.' Sproggins at sail. :i- The wind had blown the snow oil the hill, and left not much else than icy coating. There ip wasti t much of anything to sleigh-ride on except j the splendid bottom. Kbcnczer slid slightly. 'o Slow it up, Kbcnczer." said the farmer. Is The mule shook his tail vigorously. He o- planted bis fore-hoofs into the ice. They began A to B?|(C Hack, Kbenez.er. ba a-nek !" shouted Sprogth gin9Ity that time I be sleigh itself was like the old '' lady's tongue in meeting. It bad ' got a going n- and coubln t stop.' lie It shot forward and louche 1 the mule's hind as leg-' Kbenezcr was surprised, lie, a dignified, gray-haired family inule, who had never in his life kicked over the traces, had been hurt and 1I18UHQ i in ins icmieresi spot. it wa > too much, lie lifted his hind legs to kick, y. Then he wasstill more surprised. In point ol ,n_ fact, if a gallon of io lizc 1 horse radish ii.-id been poured up his nose he couldn't have hcen cl, more astonished. He fore he raised his respect" i? able heels, he had been a thing with a leg al cj. each corner. Hut affer that fatal moment, lie nn was a thing with legs only at his two front j,c corners. nft. The instant his hind legs were lifted oil the ins ground the -leigh shot still further forward jj, The shafts snapped oil quicker than the cords ne ?' RrMil't'lc. Sleigh. Sproggius, I.i /.y Ann ami the chickens went under the mule. I'.bcne/er was on top. on Then the strangest thing of all happened, on The sleigh struck the mule s front legs. After lay that he had no more legs at all any more, bul ain only just corners. The sleigh knocked him of ar. his balance and scooped hitn in bodily. U'J. Kbenezcr sat down with the folks to take i ind sleigh ride. ind lie w:b a big mule. Part of hitn sat in l.i/t ear Ann's lap. Some more of hitn spread itself ot the basket of six dozen eggs. There followed a ?lo*!met? !? tint was pitiful to see. Ilcautiful 1 "vj po<sihiliti>'.: of t'liristmns cake an>l otnrl.n lay s.mmere I along that icy liill in a way to draw tears from y -nr eyes. Kbenr/er s tail. Snriggins' feet and I.izy Ann's spare-r nun coverlet were all blended together in that dazzling true sulphur-orange tint which fashionable milliners '.v >uM give at least half of one eye ! ? catch. Still there wasn't enough sett to hold all of Kbenezcr. He lai l the rest of himself upon the chicken-coop, lie didn't look around very long about it, either. .\c\t followed a cjasii mi<1 splintering ait<l a sound like the su Men wreck of senatorial hopes in Ohio. The ohl white hen, in spile <>f her rhemnatic knees, escaped In the roadside, ittnl lay a moment fluttering upen her hack. Then she gave otic flop atul all was over. She died of heart disease. With a wild scrteeh the Shanghai rooster darted out front the other side. Sproggins Shanghai had been a beauty in his day. Its the year lssti he had been selected to head the triumphal lleinocratlc proeessi >11 that was to celebrate the presidential electim. Hut the election went t'other way. and tin- Shanghai was left in inglorious retreat. The disappoint, nient struck in on hint somehow, from that day lie drooped, or mostly lost the use of his wings. For a year he had been loo down-hearted to fly upon the roost. In moments of violent shoek the dumb have been knowu to talk, the blind to see. F.?cu so. in this supreme instant, old Shanghai tlew out of that doomed sleigh ns spry as a spring chicken. Far o'er tin* wide expanse of snow, from field to field lie flew, shouting to all the worid as lie went : "Kooklc, kookle, koo-koo 1 " Still the sleigh shot madly on. The rest of the feat here 1 crew that were not crushed were set free, lvieh in-tani one nod another made its escape : now lro:n the top of Sproggins' fur cap, now from i.izy Ann's shoulder, and now front this side and that, like shooting stars, each shrieking as it got out of that : Quackle, quackle, quack-quack ! * * it was the most expressive hen tail; ever heard tit those parts. It roused the country. Take it in nil its features, the animate I picture was a scene for a great American climmo. T.hcnczcr's nerves were not soothed by these proceedings, lie made frantic struggles to get free. And here was the tip-top net of the circus. Sproggins brain had whirled around I r half a minute, mid then settled itself unilicruVy upon the conviction that the mule sitting right tloro it: 'J?e slcrgh with hitn was running away. To his creadit, be it said, that, true to bis duty as a man and male protector, lie held fast by the rains throughout. Whenever a chicken flew Irom this side or that he jerked the lines, and called Ebcne/.cr frantically to "tvo!" A3 IIIC Slctgti sliov .v?.... Mam ..no m.ihi, pale but determined, the blessed old idiot still grasped the helm and shouted: "Wo! Ebcnczer! wo! I'da-t ycr pictcr. yon old fool, wo !" Once Ebenezer looked arn un l with nn expression of infinite disgust, as if to say : "Maybe you'd like to wo your self, wouldn t you'.'" They reached the bottom at last. Nobody was hurt. F.bcnezer s dignity had been milled beyond redemption. Ho looked not around, lie gave a bound and snort and disappeared down the road. 11 is head was up. and his tail was standing out horizontal. Thus he vanished front human ken. lie has never boon heard of. For two weeks after there was seen in Thf Iiiittli-mot JkOiinr the following "ad," to wit: SiKAVfo?.\ white mule, mxIooii hands hi^lt, u;-ly oil the liilhl lejrs. of course, it was nnexpectinglikc to himself. said Fanner Sproggirts. - No ClIANt'E Foil TIIK PltKS!l?KNCY.? 'Mauiurn,' said a little Fifth ward buy lugubriously the other day as ho laid down a volume of biographical sketches of the Presidents, 1 don't believe I'll ever be a President. 1 ain't got the chance; 1 wasn't brung up right.' 'Why, child, you have the same chance that other little boys have.' 'No, I ain't; I wasn't born in a log cabin, nor 1 ain't drove a team on the canal, nor had to read the spelling book by the light of a pine knot, nor had to split rails, nor nothin' like the rest of the boys who got .1 r . It .1 l >--- I a: uiuir. i ii'ii \"?i. iiiuiuur, i in n;i imj icuf)pcd on this Presidential business.' From tbe stress laid on the hardships endured by some of the Presidents win n hoys it is not strange that the juvenile mind should draw such a deduction. l.ittlc Jenny Vs big sister is entertaining Mr. Skibbcrs, and thinks she can get along without any assistance; so she pats the little one on the head, and says. 1 'Come, little pet, i'.'s time your eyes were closed in sleep.' iuess not, said .Jenny; Mother told uic to keep my eyes open when you and Mr. Skibbcrs were together! I Didn't Nkki? t<? i;k Tkkatkd.?Hood morning, Mrs. Hiiligan. How is Patrick this morning? Sure, lie's no hotter, sor. j [ Why don't you send him to the hospital to be treated? 4 To be treated, is it? Faith, and it's the delirium trillionim he has already. t , Pol. Ashbcl Smith, a veteran of the war for Texas independence, died in Houston. Ij.WVVKKS ami I. VW-makkus ?JUSt 0110 hundred yea:> :??. in 17SG, there was nn ;i:nusinj ?* > ?:i vor>v in Massachusetts over the grave oue>tion whotlicr lawyers were a benefit <>r an injury to the community. It was not a simple debate. which was to lead to nothing. M my people were, in fact, greatly excited over the miestion, and sonic of the Mas- iehuietts town* voted to instruct their representatives in the Legislature to endeavor to pass an act abolishing 'the order of lawyers.' One propo- i;ion was to limit the number of lawy rs in die .-'tale to twenty-live, and to have them elected by the people. It was also sui:u >ted that no member of the profession should 1>'> ? lecto?l to t'<> I turo ; lor it w is trh:?r_r?'-1 they swarmed iu tho House of 11 preoent itives, and exercised a sort of autoeratie power in framing the laws upon execution of whieh they were to fatten. A> a in alter of fact, there were then less than ninety lawyers in the whole State and tlu re were only fifteen members of the profession in the House of Representatives, of which they formed only one-sixteenth part. It was therefore a high compliment to their talents to say that they ruled the Legislature. There has always been, and there is now, a popular feeling that our national and State Legislatures contain too large a proportion of lawyers. If it he an evil, it is greater today than it ever was before. There arc delegations in Congress front some even of the larger States, which are almost t^tclusivoly e >tnp >u: 1 of lawyers. Massachusetts, for example, s nds almost as many members ot the profession to represent her in Washington at she put. a century ago, into her own Legislature. pi - - * " * i no proportion in Congress, nl which more than two-thirds arc lawyers, is much larger than it. is in I ho 1 ?r it ish Parliament. The House of Commons lately elected contains one hundred and ten barristers and twenty-throe solicitors. The two branches of the lonn 1 profess'.'n thus furnish almost exactly otic-fifill of all the members. Yet even this is a bug" ; ropoition than is contributed by any other pr -.V.-.-ion or calling. It appears, then, that whatever objection there may be to lawyers as law-makers, the people generally attach but little imports nee to them. We uiust conclude that experience shows the members of this profession to be peculiarly fitted by their mental' training for legislative duties. No doubt familiarity with practical business is useful to a member of Congress ; but even in this respect the merchant's knowledge is apt to he more narrow in its scope, it may he more thorough, so far as it extends, than the lawyer's. It will be found on looking through our political history that almost every statesman of the first rank, whether President, Senator, Representatives, or Cabinet Minister, was a lawyer or an editor. Kven Andrew Jackson was a judge before ho was a general. beginning with the year 1800, the He* publican and I emocratic parties have had in all twenty-seven canidatcs for President and Vice-President. Nineteen of thetn were lawyers, three were editors, and four were generals, (iencral (iraut is the only person not a lawyer who has occupied tiie chair of the President since 'iencral Taylor died, in 1S50. It is a mistake to think that any considerable part of the laws passed by a Legislature belongs to the class of laws which make cases for the courts, an i bring fees to members of the legal profession. It is a slander upon the lawyers who sit in our Legislatures to say that they favor bills which will increaso the number of suits, or the cost of litigation. The truth is, that great legal reforms have been effected, and are constantly making ; and these reforms are not only suggested by lawyers, but find in the profession their most intelligent and efficient advocates. A Legislature wholly composed of lawyers no Slate should have, of courseHut it is well that this calling furnishes usually the largest contingent to our lawmaking bodies. A Siikkwk Hoy.?A gentleman who was visiting one of the public schools in a Texas town asked a bright-looking boy: 'What profit is thcr* in the study of ancient history?' 'About fifty cents' 1 reckon,' was the rcply. 'What?' Well, the teacher makes ui buy the books of him, and we have to pay 81. 1 think he gets them for fifly cents apiece; so he has a clear profit of fifty cents, according i to my calculation.' The boy went home at recess, hence he could not comply with the request of the teacher to stay in after school. Six million, niuc hundred thousand bales is estimated to be last year's cotton crop! DOMESTIC) RECIPES. 1)kef Stew.?To make an appetizing beef stew, take out the bone an ! bind tbo pieces of boo! tightly, putting a lemon, pared an<l cut in two, and Home herbs in before binding, l'laee it in as small a stewpan or kettle as will allow ol its being covered with water. Let it cook slowly and gently ; do not add any water unless absolutely necessary. Slice a large onion ami fry it htown, and add to the water also any sliced vegtables you choose, or cook the vegetables in a kettle by themselves, and serve on the platter with the beef. I f you do n o add any water, you will have a very rich gravy and a portion of it may be reserved for soup stock. II \m ('<?okki> in Cider.?Put a pint of eider and a ettpof brown sugar into enough water to cover the ham; boil three hours, or until the skin will peel oil* easily. l\euiove the skin, cover tho ham with a crust of sugar, and b.ik6 in a slow oven throo hours. 1 lissolve a enn of Rii<?ar in _ ? ninf of cider, ami baste the limn frenqently while baking. If the cider is very sweet, use lesb sugar. To Waiim Ovkii Coi.ii Hkkk.? A dish which is liked by the hungry and the hearty, is made in this way : Take some thin slices of cold roa-t beef, brown them in butter warm some cold boiled potatoos which you have chopped line and seasoned well. Heat also cold boiled oabbajro chopped tine. When these are all hot, place a layer of meat in a warm vegetable dish, then a layer of the potato, then of the beef, then of the cabbage, and so until tl-.e dish is full. Ho this as speedily as possible, so as to send it hot to the table. ClIH'KKN L'kiuji kttks.?Take a good size chicken, and one pound of lean veal. Cook meat and chicken together. Save the liquor, hash up the chicken and veal finely together ; season with milk, pepper, salt, parsley, and half a tablespoonfnl of grated onion. Take a loaf of bread, stale, rub the bread into emmbs until you have equal quantities of crumbs and meat. IMaee over tho fire as much of the liquor as will moisten well tlie crumbs, into which stir tho milk, and a piece of butter the size of an ogg. When it boils stir in tho cru- ^* until they stick to the spoon. AddMhc meat and, when cold, two wcll-bcaten eggs. i n _ a _ ii- M i r. i ii - rorin mm runs wim your nanus, roil mem in crumb.", and Cry in hot lard like dough^ I UUtl*. Potato CuoqijKTTF.s arc nice lor supper, and arc preferred by some people to the much-praised Saratoga potatoes. Take two cups of cold mashed potatoes, two eggs, a lump of butter the size of an egg, salt au<L popper to taste, and half a cupful of line cracker crumbs. Mix well ; roll with your hands on a kneading-hoard in round cakes or long ones ; scatter a little flour 011 the board ; drop the cakes in hot hrd and fry until they are brown. TltU JlOMAXOF. OF A CoAI. SfOVK.? One day last fall, after talking until his throat was sore, a Detroit stove dealer succoeded in selling a widow a eoal stove, hut it was with the proviso that if everything didn't work satisfactorily, he was to make it. Two days after delivering the stove he got his first call. A hoy entered the store and said: 'Mrs. wants you to come up and fix that stove. The house is full of smoke A man was sent up, and lie found the trouble to be with the chimney. Only three or four days hail passed when the boy came in again and said : That stove is pulling and blowing and scaring the widow to death. She wants the same man to come up again. He was scut, and it was discovered that she didn't know how to arrange the dampers and drafts. Everything seemed to run well for a week, and then the boy walked in to announce : She sent inc down to have you send that man up again. The house is full of coal gas. The man went up and applied tho remedy, but inside of three days the stove got to pulling; two days after that the fire wouldn't draw ; then it drew too much ; then gas escaped again. At length the dealer went to the house and said: Madam, you gave me for the stovo ; how much will you take for it ? I wouldn't sell it. Hut I can't be sending my man up here every two or three days all winter. You won't have to. I've concluded to marry him in order to have some one hero , in case of an accideut. And tlirop iUvk firm tliev nurn niliet.lv ; ?J" ~r>~ J l J and happily married.?Detroit Free Frets. i , The discovery has been mado that tho world doesn't revolve with tho same uion tncutuin it did a thousand years ago, but it i still swings around fast enough to satisfy i the nun with a heavy note coming due.