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- ADVERTISING RATES. THE Aertise-ens inerted at the ra t $1.00 per square (one inch) for first iertior IS PUBLISH-Dand 75 cents for ea'ch subsequent insertiO' IS PUBLISHED 9Rl oQnaVrieet e e e VEy WEDNESDAY NORNING, trit ~y~j~ WEDESDA MORIN-\ of respect, same rates per square as orilinal) advertisements. At Newberry, S. C. - sre&l Notices in Loeal column 15 een perlhue. BY THO. F. GRENEKER, e".ins*r Editor andProprietor. Terins, $2.1.00 per 1.1panuell, A Family Companion, Devoted to Literature, Miscellany, News, Agriculture, Markets, &c Invariably im Advance. eTpaper is stopped at the e WTEATNEr: ANI ISATC Vol. eoeXIL NEWBERRY, S.JANUARY 5, 1881. No. 1. TERMS CASH Drugs X Fancy articles. DR. S. F. FANT, Wholesalz ari Retail (Ie--s I-oported and Indigenous Lrng.. S: p-e ..._1 Ratre C'hemicnl6. Foreign tnd Domestic Medical PrepAra tions. FinEssetid ils and Select Powders. Ne PharmaceuLdeal 1t-mnedies'. tu.cial attet!tion is ea!led to the low1o% ing Sa1ndatrd Preparaition.s: h FA NT'S Lver Ri't or. FAN TS Elix:r o1Calisaya With Pyrophr-s yunte of Irou. FA NT" CO.-pou- Fluid Extrac of l,i-hu F.a '. -o opourd Extract of Qicen'-. i-bt an San saparilla, with of P'otassimu. F.ANT'S Soothirg Syrup. Fi:NT'S Esse,e of -Tamaca Ginger. FANT'S Ague Cure-well knowtA to everv one in the County, haviog been i thorougbly teated in fever and agne. FA-NT'S 0Ologne. Guratne and Iron Bitters-the great Blood Pnriifier. Sole Agent for Swift's Syphilitic Specific, the Great Eliminator of al Impuritiesof the Blood. The curt- for Scrofula, Rhe.uma tism, Neourailgia ind all Ne'rvous Affections. Buckeye Pale Ointment, a specific !or Piles. I also offer the largest assortment of Lzmps, Soaps, Perfumery, Hair Brushes, Tooth Brushes, and Toilet Articles, of ev ery description, at the very lowcst prices. Call and examine foi yourselves. Prescriptions carefully compounided at all hours of the dav and night. Mar. Z1, 14-tf. . e?iiscellaneons. Ba-J. F. GRArros, SToUr B. LAi)D, IULBEIrT E. PAINE. Late C6inmissioner of Patents. PATENTS. PAINE, GRAFTON & LADD, Attorneys-at-Law and Solicitors of Ameri can and Foreign Patents. 412 FiFrH STREET, WASIHfNrGTo. D. C. Practice patent law in all its branches in the Patent Office, and in the Supreme and Circuit Courts of the United 'States. Pam phlet sent tree on receipt of stamp for post age. Sep. 1,188A 36-ta. NEW RESTAURANT -AND SAMPLE ROOM. The undersigned woind rvpecifollr 1.- 1 form hs friends that he h"s opened THE RESTAURANT In rear of the grocery 5,ore, corner of Richiardson and Taylor Streets. The are beautifi lY fitzed u-. Meais are at a4l hours durin-, the day. HVT LUN0H every dv from 11 to 1 P. M. The best Winp, Liqiors and Cigars, I CiJer ar.d Lager Beei. G. DIE11CHS, Dec. 22, 52--tf . COLUiila, S. G. , TT AGENTS I {J .IWANTED. We want a limited number of active. en ergetic canvassers to engage in a pleasagt and profitable business. Good men will find this a rare chance TO MAKE MONEY. Such will please answer this advertise ment by letter, enelosing stamp fo'r reply. stating what business they have been en gaged in. None but those who mean busi neas need apply. A ddress FINLEY, HARVEY & CO., Nov. 17.180-47-2y. Atlanta, Ga. THE Respeed.ully otYers its servies to those paren.s who desire to secure for tiwir daughters the :horough and symmt2etricanl cultivation of their physienl, int-e'u '!, and moral powers. It is c-ondunctd en what is called the "One-Study" Plan, with a Sm-.Asso. Couts of Study ; and, by a system of Tuitional P're miums, its Low Rates tare made suil lower for m.L who average 85 per cent. No Public Exercises. No "-Receptions." G:aduation, which is always private, may occur eight times a year. For full information, write for an llus trated Catalogue. Addres REV. S. L ANDER, President, Oct. 27, 44-ly Willianiston, S. C. f Yourselves by making money when a golden chance is offered, thereby always ikeeping poverty irom your door. Those who al ways take advantage of the godchances for making money that are oered, gene rally become wealthy, while those wino do not improve such chances remlain ini pover ty. We,*want many men, women. heys anom girls to work for us right in their own lo calities. The business will pay more than ten times ordinary wages. W e furnish an expensive outtlt and all that you need. free. No one who engages fails to make money very rapidly. Y'ou can devote your wihole time to the work, or only your spare moments. Full information and all that is needed sent free. Address Stinson & Co.. Portland, Maine. Oct. 13. 42-1y. HARVEY REESE, IN NEWBERRY HOTEL Belt g desirous. of giving gen '-ai satisfac tion, 1 have spred. 1o paiUS to mnake my shop) comfortable and mgreeabh- to all who visit mue. I will :h conmduct the business. and aoiicit plain and faehionable work. Sat isfaction' guaraaeed. I tiha:.k mny jnmer ous patron1s for their generous support im thne mast. Sep. 22, 39 -f H. L. FARLEY, Attornley at Law REAL ESTATE AGENT, SPARITANBUJRG, 8.0C. PROMPT ATTEETIOM TG ALL BUSINESS. MLar. 10, 11-y. -XIiscellaneous. lew Store! New Stock! 1.tving oreemi,d a iww und contmodious ,ore o:i the .ite of ou O1i St.tud, our fa li:ie '0o C0'onducting Olt- Foreig:n aud Do et-ic Fruit tr-;de ::t*i inow u sr m - Thle aktteti,oi o! ouifr-:,s ami dealersq %er.iy, ik cak1e to 0his facft, al.d also to -r !.'h Iupp;:e5 w iing to-,Iav. I t,; ,arrels Northern .s.PPLES. i boxes Mesina Lt-mtmis. -25 b-irrvi., an-i h-ul b,at reis Peatr 5 pkg.. Delawre a:i.l Guonerd Grape'. 2s b:arrels L, Ro-e Potatoes. .25 1poiiihre l 0L:nio 3. Iw barrels Noi thern Cahe. Peachei ad Grapes i ! ven moing v Exoress. C. 1.\RT & ., 55, -57 .d 5.1 ah t -e . -*p. 2-, :9-4 i t harluton, . C 1880. 1880. 't 1N3 CbiT I 1 TEL, (Formerly the Wheeler House,) COLULMBIA, S. C. 110ROUGHLY HYNOVATED, REFURNISHED AND REFITTED. TERMS, $2.00 TO $3.00 PER DAY. OHN T. WILLEY, Propriet'r. Nov. 10, 46-tf. PRED VON SANTEN, 279 KING ST., C00LESTN, S. 0. anta Das' fl dquArlrs, WHOLESALE AND RETAIL. OW REAM* TO SUPPLY EVERYfB01tf; )OME AND- SEE ME. .NV. 17. 47-6.n. HENRY BAYER, IMPORTER 'OF BANANAS, ZOANUTS AND ORANGES, And Wholesale Deler in pples, Potatoes, Onions, &c., 215 EAST BAY. CiHARLESTON, S. C. [G' Promipt attcntiou given to country re;rs. Nov. 17, 47-Gm. C. C. PLENGE, er aer Broad and Church Streets, CHARLESTON, S. C. AGENT FOR DUNLAP'S FMTH AVENUE HATS. FAL.L STYLES NOW READY! Uie .ik 'atS. t.0. $34 0 . *Ken's Solt 1ats. Sc. to $r.. MnCI's StifT UUts. $1.00 to $:.50. OBY hATS FOR. YOUNG 31EN, A SPECIALTY. U.BUELLAS. Silk Umbrellas, fron $.00 upwards. :.Ia from $2 5v to $4.50. G ing~h " 75ci., $1.00, $1.25, $1.50. Morniug Bands put on 11ats.25 Cents. HatsRecetocked and Triunied. .&y A call is respectully solicited. Nov. 17,47-Onm. rAVI LION HOTEL, CHARLESTON, S. C. Tis poptulair and centrally located House as been entirely renovated during the past ummner and was REOPENED to the travel g public on August 16,1880. Terms, $2 and $2.50 per Day, E. T. GAILLARD, Nov. 17, 47-tf. PROPRIE fOR. HERMANN BULWINKLE, ~actr and General Commissiei Iercbant CHARLESTON, S, C., DEALER IN 3ERMA.N KAINIT, or POTASU SALT, Pernvian Guano. No. 1 and'No. 2, Pure Fish Giuaro, Nova Scotih Land Plas. er, Ground south Garolina Pbosph.ate, and ,her FERTILUZERS. Also, Corn, Oats, Hay, &c. Orders filled with dispatch, and iiberal tdvances made on consignmieras of Cotton td other Produce. Nov. 10, 46-3m. Preserve Your Old Books ! E. R. STOKES, Blank Book Manufacturer GEIR1R BI00KBNDER Has moved opposite the City Hall, where he is fully prepared, with first-class work men, to do alI.kinds of work in his line. BLANK BOOKS RULED to any pattert and bound itn any style desired. Myv facilities and long acquaintance with the bimies. enab'e me to guarantee satisfac. tion on orders for Bank Books, Rairoad Books, and Booka for the use of Clerks of Court, Sheriffs, Probate Judges. Masters it .quity, and other County Ulficialis. Pmphlets, Magazines, Mu-ic. Newspaper and Periodicals, and all kinds of pub!ication: boun on the most reasonable terms and its the best manner. All orders promptly attended to. E. R. STOKES, Man Street, opposite New City Hall, Oet 8, 41-t f. .Colubia. S. C. NEWBERRY HOTEL, -BY A. W. T. SIMMONS. This elegasnt new IIotel is no0w opeu for th retiot:n of guests, and the pro;.rietor wil spare no effort to give satisfaction to thb traveling public. Good airy rooms, com :r ble beds, the but of fare, attentive, ac e.nmdting servants,and modera te charge! Pianos and Organs. C 91 0 CD CD 0 O tic) 0 Z> C+ 0 s'-o p to - r weop o w CIC: *0* fO - NATURE ODN REMEDY A ;VEGETABLE , MEDICINE FOR T',-lE i IBP.0RD ER&KIODYS.I pasA med!icil-al com pnudo nv au Fo3lo iese'E MEDATINE FOR - T h r--" - ,Jir r the e les. For Liver comIplains. Harmles~s in r.ction an<i thioroughi in its effect. E, It is unetxcelled for the TCURAi - cure of atl Blood ble. For Kidr.ey Diseases. uta, Tusa)ora. Bo.Ls, Tetter.Salt Rheu 21. Rheumactin:nl.Mer CUAIENTU u.ialJoion5ng, For Reutuatisml. gh,pJld. In ". 1oach R e entin - CURA TINE, "'''"lftiflo For Scrofuta Di eaees. ASK YOUR DJRUGCIST FOR IT. CURATINE, THEBRFEucaL cOc. ror n'apea,Papo BALTIMORE, Md. Wholesale by DOWIE: & .3o0s$, Wholesale Druggists. Charleston, S. C. 15-ly. NEVER FAILS To Give Entire Satisfaction. A pill th a. has become standard and is having an utnprecedent'd sale throughout the South, is GILDER'S Liver Pills, They are honest, They are certain., They have no equal, And are ree9>mne.ded byv themc.14 asbe ng,ddoing? all ui.w : P 'pe r claim bor them. Tihey have neve'r f.ald to h.ave te de. ii.d effect where other pilb. h,.ve* b- .,n un successfully tried. - --AT W. E. PELHAM'S. SUBSCRIBE FOR THE WEEKLY PALMETTO YEOMAN, COLUMBIA. S. C. It is an 8 page paper, des.ignedi for the peo ple, filled witIh in:eresdt,g matter--Fan ily Reading, News, Mairkets, &c. Subsicription: One Year, si 50: Seveu Months, $1.00; Tree Months, 50O Cents--paya:>Ae in -ad vance. For Six Names. and Nine Dollars an Extra Copy for one year. Specimens fur nished. The DAILY YEOMAN, an after noon paper,% $4 a year. - ~ C. M1. McJUNKIN. 40-tt Editor and Publisher. Clnhhad witht rhe Hama.at $.'125. C,5p. HERE AND THERE A GEM. GATHERED FOR THE N. T. OBSERVER. "When thou hast thanked thy God for eve blessing sent, What time will then remain for murmurs lament." -Archbishop Trench. I Itnow not if or dark or brignt Shall be my lot, If that wherein my hopes delight Be best or not. It may be mine to drag for years Toil's heavy chain; Or day and night, my meat be tears On bed of pain. Dear faces may surround my hearth With smiles and glee; Or I may dwell alone and mirth Be strange to me. My bark is wafted from the strand By breath divine, And on the balm there rest a hand Other than mine. One who has known in storms to sail, I have on board; Above the raging of the gale I have my Lord. He holds me when the billows smite; I shall not fall. If sharp, 'tis short; if long, 'tis light; He tempers all. Safe to the land! safe to the land I The end is this, And then with Him go hand and hand Far into bliss. -Dean Alford. A FORCED. COFESSI0i -0 It bad been a stltry day at Fei Island. All the afternoon the tr< boughs had drooped under t] tropic glow of the sun, the bir had huddled silently it bowei no-.ks, the cattle stood knee dei in the delicious ripples of the lit ped water, and Kitty Crawfor peeping ont from behind the serei of her Madeira vines, had watch< the party of picknickers go by their little pony photons and t huge, covered wagon, not witho a sigh. 'It's all very well to have L thing to do but to enjoy on self, but I have got the litt chickens to take care of, and t gooseberry jam to make, and u own blue muslin dress to iron, i expect to look decent in chur next Sunday. Oh, dear ! oh, des how nice it would be if peoj didn't have to work in this worl. There goes Matilda Emmons, her new lace bunting dress wi the white Langnedoc trimming how pretty she looks, to be surt And Miss Emmons, catching~ glimpse of Kitty Crawford's v let blue eyes behind the Madei vines, drew up her horse witt scientific jerk of the reins. 'Kitty,' she cried, in sweet,i perative tones, 'aren't you going 'To the picnic, do you mean ? -To the picnic, of course.' 'Certainly I'm niot ?' retort Kitty. 'But why ?' questioned M Emmons. Kitty elevated her pretty t tilted nose in the air. 'Because,' said she, 'I doi choose to be looked down upon those haughty city girls and th attendant cavaliers.' 'Nousense !' said Matilda. 'You may say wh:. you pleat returned Kitty, 'but 1 know ti Parke Cameron despises me, cause I have red hands, and fre< led across the bridge of my noc and because I am only a farne daughter. And I won't be spised !' 'You little goose !' cried 11 Emmions, with good-humored periority. 'Didn't be dance w you, and no one else, last night the moon-light frolic?' 'That's because he wanted amuse himae!f,' said Kitty, haug ly. 'Do you suppose I don't< riminate between real, genu respect, and the supercilious[ ronage of a fine gentleman whi l'ughing in his sleeve all time ?' And the indignant dewdr, sparkled on her long, curled e lashes as she spoke. 'You're altogether mistake cried Miss Emmnons, with emp sis. 'But if'you will be so wro headed I can't stop to argue " y. omyl jnump into the p2 carriage and go with me to tb pienic ' But Kitty resolutely shook he head. I'No.' said she, 'I shall stay a home and pick gooseberries fo ry jam.' Eat, instead of picking goose 0..a ." berries she indulged in a hearti cry, when Matilda and her pon2 were ou1t of sight. 'He don't care for me,' said shi to berself. 'and I'm determined - won't care for him ! He shal find out I'm not one of the senti mental damsels we read of ii books who die of unrequite< love.' And Kitty Crawford dasbe< the salt spray off her eyelashes and went out to feed the down little chickens, which were peep ing about the kitchen doorston like so many animated balls o yellow velvet. And there was butter to worl over and to pack down in hug stone jars; and the blue musli dress, with its multitudinous littl frills and flounces to iron ; an then her brother Philo came i with a linen duster that must b mended before he could set fort on his daily walk to the ps4toffice and old Mrs. Dodge sent over t - see if Miss Kitty would make bowl of jelly to tempt the failiu appetite of her consumptiv daughter ; and the brood c young turkeys wondered off int the wheat-fields, and had to b coaxed home again ; so that i was quite dark before Kitty r membered the gooseberries fo the morrow's jamr-.dark wit Is electric masses of purple-blac . clouds piled up against the sk3 and ominous mutterings of that 9 der in the air. n d) '1 do believe its going to rain said Kitty, despairingly, 'and m, d gooseberries are not picked yet And with a quick motion sh caught Phil's hat and duster frot ie 0 at the hatrack, and sped down int the cool, secluded greenery of tb 0. garden, where a neighbor's bug Spear-tree droopod over the stoi wall on one side, and the hedge ,leb be gooseberry bushes grew below. But as the green balls of swee ness rained down into ber baske she became conscious of a rustlin rI in the pear boughs beyond whei ile a huge hammock swung. - Some of Mrs. Peck's city boar< in ers arc there,' said Kitty to he th self ; 'but I won't notice 'er.' __But she colored 'celestial ros; red' under the broad brim of hi abrother's Manilla hat, when st recognized tbe sound of Parn Cameron's low and rather langui a voice. 'Js it you, Philo ?' mKitty picked on, silently ar ?expeditiously, without a sing wvord of answer. But evidently the interlocut< ed was not discouraged. 'So you're like me,' he resum< S-'preferring your own society the gay clamor of the picnic pa ty.' P'Philo,' said Cameron, abruptl s't do you suppose I should flt by your sister at home, if I were ai go up to the house ? She avoit me so systematically that I ci never get an opportunity , speak, to her ; and, for the life lat me I can't tell why.' be The Manilla hat dropped low k. than ever among tbe gooseberi se, tbicketi;the nervous fingers wor n's ed away with redoubled speed. 1e- Kitty Crawford wished hers< anywhere on earth just then b .is on that particular spot. su- 'Do yen think I should have t ith ghost of a chance with her, i. at asked her boldly to become n wife?' said Parke Cameron, plur to ing valiantly into the heart of I ht subject ; 'for, of all the girls I ev is- aw, she comes nearest to my id< in of perfect womanhbood, and I ha rat- learned to love her deeply a is passionately I Don't, for heavel the sake, be so silent, old fellow, t less you- purposely wish to d ops courage my suit I' he added, wi ye- something like impatience in voice. 'Tell me, have I groun n !' for hope?' ha- Kitty was trembling all ov ng- more like a frighted blue-bi 'ith jcaught in a net. Was ever ag ,ypaced in such an embarrassi 3 predicament before. How she wished she had let Philo's linen e duster and broad-brimmed hat: alone! t 'Why don't you answer me?' S'demanded the deep voice, waxing still more impatient in its tone. And to add to Kitty's perplex-; ities, the big drops of rain began r to patter inexorably down, and a zig-zag streak of ligbtning shot crosswise across the threatening sky, a zone of living fire. 'Discretion is the better part of . valor,' said our little heroine to t herself and, catching up the only r 1 half-filled basket of emerald fruit, she prepared for au iguominious - I flight. But Mr. Cameron had no notion of this. With a quick movement - he sprang from the hammock t 5 above, and placed himself direct f ly across the narrow pathway, I thus effectually barricading all re r treat. 3 'Old fellow !' said be, half laugh. I ing and half in earnest, 'you shall a not stir a step from here unless I you tell me whether or not-' I ' will go !' cried Kitty Crawford, a bursting into hysterical tears. 2 'You-you have no right to stop me this way !' > If the thunderbolts even then . muLtering through the Lilight sky had siricken him with their e electric hands, Parke Cameron f could have scarcely been more stupified and amazed. e 'M1iss Crawford ' he exclaimed, t 'Kitty, can it be possible that this a is you ?-that I have committed r such an awkward blunder as-' b But, in the self-same instant, he k comprehended that his suit must - be pleaded now or never-that a i- cowardly lover is never a success ful one. ,' 'Kitty,' said he, still barricading y the way. '1 have told you frankly !' that I love you. You must be e equally outspoken with me.' n 'But-but it rains !' faltered Kit o ty, looking wildly this way or that e for some method of escape. e 'I don't care if it rains a de e lucgel' said Parke Cameron ; 'I >f will know my fate!' 'When we get up to the house,' t- said Kitty, evasively. t, 'Now,' insisted Cameron. g 'Please let me get by,' pleaded -e Kitty. 'Not until you decide one wvay j or the other,' said Parke. r- 'But I have decided,' said Kit ty, cruelly maltreating the buttons r- of Philo's linen duster in her con r fusion. e 'Speak out your decision, then, :e at once,' said Parke Cameron, d niith an imperiousness that some how didn't displease Miss Craw ford at all. d 'I do love you,' blushingly con le fessed Kitty-'that is, I think I do.' >r And then the rain came down in huge cylinders of crystal;, and d the lhghtning blazed overhead, . and Parke and Kitty had to run n- for their lives to the piazza of the old farm-house. 'There l' said Kitty, 'I haven't d picked my gooseberries for the o jam, after all.' ~ I'll help you to-morrowv,' said n Parke Cameron. to And, to the end of his days, he of declared that gooseberry jam was his favorite conserve. .y Experiment has shown that if k 50,000 pounds, once applied, will just break a bar of iron or steel, a fstress very much less than 50, u000 pounds will break it if re peated suffieien tly often. Wrought iron will crystallize anid break beasier thneast ro.It is well known that wrought iron, sub 7 jected to continuoue vibration, assumes a crystalline structure, hand its cohesive power is much er Ideteriorated there by.' a'You can't play that on me !' ,said the piano to the amiateer who broke down on a difficult piece of i-music. 1is A California man has a farm of ds 65,000 acres. It is fortunate for him that he hasn't them in his er, aw. rd ir A may may be headstrong m. withont heing strong-headed. Risallaneous. TO THE LADIES. L Few Practical Words From an Augusta Housekeeper. The following, from a well-known ugusta lady we publish with pleas ire, as containing a few words of im. ortance: 7ditors Chronicle and Constitu. tionalist : I am not sure bat that I should say o the gentleieu that I address my emarks on the very interesting.sub. ect of good eating and home cookery -for after all they are the;ones for rhom, we cudgel our brains, toast.our aces and burn our fingers in ,the arnest endeavor to provide daicties hat will tickle. their palates, win their miles, and, as a matter of course, :eep them in a good humor. To secure this last named result, me of the best methods known is to eat them to a nicely appointed, well repared dinner, and it seldom fails. [t is, therefore evident that the ladies, n this very pardonable desire.and in heir own pride of housekeeping, ueed 11 - the assistance that is to be had, md now we come to the subject un oer discusion to the point to which I ould call attention. The Ladies' Aid Society of the Second Presby erian Church have, through. their abors, supplied a long felt. want in the Issue of a book. -called ."Choice Be :ipes of Georgia Housekeepers,' and .ey are recipes that have been well ried, and that are well known to all, and the very name of the book insures good cheer and the best of living. The names annexed .to the recipes are a guarantee of their worth, and no housekeeper need fear in the use of them the result that hasibeen often known to follow the trial ofa indis criminate recipes, viz: The loss of aterial, time and patience. So I would suggest to all good diners, or those who love the good things of this life. to provide theniselves with a copy of this valuable work, and se cure thereby the smiles of their wives, thd gratitude of tbse workers in a good cause, and last but by no means least, increased satisfaction in the en joyment of well-made dishes. HOUSEKEEPER. Not a few of our anecdotes of wit and humor are connected with the clergy, all denomi.iations of whom are at times represented. This time it is a good Methodlist brother of whom we speak. Through the influence of a presiding elder, who, as he thought, was prejudiced against him, he was appointed to a small and scattered settlement, when he and most of his friends felt that he ought to have been sent to some prominent position. Lamenting the narrowness ofg~he field to which he had been allQtted, he was reminded by a friend that he ought not to be dissatisfied, but rather to pray that he might see the hand of the Lord in his appointment to just such a place. To which he replied, 'I have-I have tried, brother, to do as you1 say ; and time and again I have prayed to the Lord that I might see His band in it, but every time, as I looked up, all I could see wa.s the big paw of that presiding elder." A NEW COMET DISCOVERED.-The chairman of the committee on astron omy heaved a deep sigh and reported as follows : "Dis committee am well awar' of de fack dat a comet has re ently bin diskivered about 60,000, 000 miles on de road to Heaben, an' dat it am now supposed to be ap prochin' de y'arth at a rapid rate, but de comnmittee sees no speshul oc cashun to get excited. it will be a month or so before de said comet eau git here, an' de chances am, dat de 'arth will mash it at de fust bump. Dis commit:,ee advises de members of de club to git dar butes tapped, dar overcoat8 patched an' dar wood hauled up fur winter, an' let de comet biz. ness take keer o' itself."-Free Press. False fronts of shirts, vest and coat are now furnished corpses by the New York undertakers for $10; a saving of $30 on a suit. "Ain't the deceased loss enough without chucking in his clothes, too ?' re marked on of them in defense of the sham. He computes that $3,000,000 were annually wasted in grave clothes, besides being a temptation to grave robhery. A few facts not so generally known as they'- shduld be: - 4wa4ch filed with a second-Ea-ad u&id not'tiepasi. Iy be._-__ -lead-wewhek-BeOWrs v.,nerally. agree about'leeing their patients. Steam - isa .servibt,ithat sometimes blows up iteeasate n 11ngramaAtical judgi:ia apt to?=;n' incorrect sentence. Pouchera who get into prA-erves very-. of&k-.s-fmd themselves in -pickles..- Any foolman wake a wan 'talk,bhb it's hdAo make one isten. 'A -sbarain-the buslh-is worth two im IMhe hauL.d Affectionate wnother,t o:- s)-op 'Why dojou cry, Jolpny- Wj&hs hurt you?' Johnny egg a4re lautily pasagfrecvauege~ll Mother-.Yesterda ! TheAIy4lo you cry to-day J' .iba or,ng at the top of his voice)-,O4A, .'calse you weren't home,yestr4y.' - A droll fell4, 1ised A ric.old gentleman out of amipond,ag re fused the offer of tweng vcets from the rescued miser. 'Oh,-that's too much !" caolzaed he ; "tain't worth it !" andhe4an4ded 4Awen ty-one .cnts, saying. almls." je pocketed .four qen4, isat. about right." The section hands near ,Rock Rap ids, Ill., discovered the head o ef calf' protruding from a snow difi .the other day. Up.qn a2%eligg 0opthe critter proved to be iie afd imme diately began eating. Ielonged to Hoval .Oeson, hadbeen.ihtly buuud up -y the drift fox d 'A Duthan who i dh ee ond wife soon after the funeral he. first' was tisied with a-two hottrs' sereuadein tokn of Heapp 6 -He gxpostulated pathetically t1us: 'I say, poys, you ought to beshamed'of yourselfto'be' making al&dis noise ven dere 'vas a funeral here so soon. -1 - .4 An exchange gives 'a' reewp,for preserving 'the hair.' Bt Bti l the use of wasting 1ugar db sech"6IHff Nobody would eat such preserve." A man who relishes tri'Igfind a pickled chignon palatable, bildre don't believe lie would jake kindly to preserved hair. 'Do you want' to ifl1hcYrMd ?I claimed a gentleman as be sawa oy tip the baby out of itscisrriagon.Ae walk. 'No, not quite,' repTied The boy ; 'but if I can get him to biwl loud enough, mnother will take~care of him while I go and~ wae%thd h A lady want.-"to laio* rh hfle railroad companies do -not 'p:vide special 'cars for' tobaco chewet,''as well as for smokers. 'Bles3oufhn 'rfoeent-heirt! tobec kwers freot so pairticular as that. EnJ ordinary passenger enr is g fd -eEotgh "for them. - A reporter'-eatt brking house and takes notes, a,id it'i a#lright. Along comes. another -fellow, -akes some notes and gets-jugged for'Irc years. This illustiates thd prites enjoyed by the prew. A Westera young lady 'who has been visiting Boston1'saya.the gy.ng men there~ are so vald tha&.they! atas if they thoughtTbe7 wsre -digybu the greatest possible fayer;jspeking The new .governes-'ff yea aa a poor man starvinlg,in the ..#ret, wobldn't you give himz, somoaof popr pudding, Tommy?' Tommj,dFd' give him some of yours, Miss Smith ! - We have just read a.hapdker chief flir tation code andpd~visenal men desiring to-avoid.k.beeof promise suits to wipe t.heiroes with their coat-tails. , [Boston.Post. 'Oh, dear ! I wish .L was degd!' exclaimed a neglected maiden. She had heard that match* are made in heaven. Afamiliar instance of coo-is s is that of a man taking a bro aik ambrella'and Yeat ig a,g~r*n.giggya~n in its place. The Utes have killed five of Ouray's best horses that they migh t accom pany him to the 'happ'y huting