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Will not blow out or thumb screws, so ths detached. Throws a Extra large red danger It is equipped with handl good hand lantern. Strong At Deale STANDARE i (Incorporat Newark, N. J. If You Have t i Advertise in I * i????????? i . ? || SEE For the Gardener, Truck . ii?" ready to fill orders for a seeds. WE SELL SEEE grow, eat and sell vegefe cost of living. While in You will be pleased wit] * -* J 11 ? garaen seeas we sen iur Seed Irish P( eties. Special price to s for 25c in coin or stamps generous package, each garden seeds: Cabbagi cucumber and mustard. tORICK & U SEE COLUMBIA, jpTH 1730 MAIN STRE1 '{"f Ib where you can fin< ^ PAI i p OP A] DOORS, S BLINI | t.tmfi an | cabinet || Call or write for Prices i atosT proof ; /r. GUARANTEED TO 1 iff ' FROM THE ORIGINAL I ; 7 i Two" Established 1868. Paid ' We grew the first ntOSTHHOOFPUU fied customers. We have ro*? sad sold mot Stat*? c?*blae<l. WHIT Because our plants mi :i It is time to set these plants in your section to j sell for the most money. WE SOW THREE Earn Yonr PicMs for a Slight Postage Paid 30 cents per 100 plants. By exj special rate Is very low, 500 for $1.00; 1.000 thousand; 10,000 and over 01.00 per tbousu ' # ,WM.C.6ERATY,CO? B HgMpppNnB H^Forthe ^ Rn?d TO DRIVING LAMP nost compact and efficient :e for all kinds of vehicles. ' jar out. Equipped with at it is easily attached or clear light 200 feet ahead. signal in back, e, and when detached makes a ;. Durable. Will last for years. rs Everywhere ) OIL COMPANY wd m Njw Jersey) Baltimr s. Md. Inytiiingfo sen The Dispatch. ? t :D&! ~ = ET7 er and Farmer. We are now 11 kinds of field and garden >S THAT GROW, therefore ibles and reduce the high i Columbia visit our store, h the qnantity of reliable the money. iIaIaaa We offer the lTOTalOC" nticDDinn "PoH naiuoo bp ^ sack buyers. Special offer: 5 we will mail, postpaid, a i of the following reliable 5, Tomato, Radish, Beets, iwance, Inc. DMEN. SOUTH CAROLINA. j WN & BRQ? ET, COLUMBIA, S. C. 1 one of th6 best stocks of ilj INTS^ uL KINDS | i ? j'k >S& GLASS D CEMENT. | MANTLES. ! CABBAGE PLANTS * SATISFY CUSTOMERS 1\ MBBMS rUNI CKOWBtS || erorasfirox " AOCCSTAtaljcixs* ~~ ?BOH? " FLVTDCTCB / / ftallMdVaii^ . Cua&ioetrM*. ,^gatt^ LtuOy J ^COP-o--^ j in Capital Stock $3Q,000.00 4m^jy HTSlnlSSS. Now have over twenty thousand satis' eabbag plants thao *11 oth^r prrtoni la thr Southern ut please or we send your money back. Order now. get extra early cabbage, and they are the ones that TONS OF CAB BASK SEED PEN SEASON. Service?Ask Us How ?i??-i*1lK5 iress, buyer paying express charges, which under to 4,000 $1,50 per thousand; 5000 to 9000. $1.25 per ?d.^r "?*?" ** tox, 22 Yonges Island, 8. C. BOWSERDIES HARD But His Mother-in-law Wins From Start to Finish. SHE COMES UNEXPECTEDLY. And Proceeds to Put Her Rampageous Son Through His Paces?The Lawn WilJ Not Be Planted In Hollyhocks; Neither Will the House Be Painted. By M. QUAD. [Copyright, 1913, by Associated Literary Press.] 1AM Mr. Bowser's mother-in-law. I am glad he married into the family. He's just the kind of a man that needs taking down a peg or two every few days, and I'm just the woman to do it. I believe he would poison me if he saieiy coum, ana i aamit that some day I may break bis neck. . I packed my trunk and took a little journey the other day. I gave him no advance warning that I was to arrive, but reached his home from the depot about C o'clock in the evening. He happened to be in the front hall and answered my ring himself, and for a moment after catching sight of me he looked like one who was staring at a ghost. "If you have not lost what little sense you ever possessed," I said, "you will pay the driver and get my trunk upstairs. How is Amanda?" "She?she?she is well!" he stammered. "We L.dn't expect you." "No, probably not, but it's my little way of dropping in when I'm not expected. Get a move on you!" Bowser's Plans. T Tirn<a <arwm fn thp firms of IT1V dfinch ter, and after dinner she took me up to ber bedroom and told me bow glad ! she was that I bad come. Mr. Bowser j I ML" I "I AM MB. BOWSER'S MOTHER-IJf-LAW." was od the rampage, and my arrival was opportune. After questioning her at length I discovered the following: That he was planning to repaint the bouse, although it had two fresh coats last year. That he was intending to plant the whole back yard to sunflowers next spring. That the whole front yard was to be i given up to hollyhocks. That he was going to clean house and be three weeks about it That he was going to attend an auction sale next day and buy $500 worth of antique furniture. That he had raised a row about the gas bill and charged his wife with having got up at midnight and turned on every burner in the house. That she had hunted up a dressmaker for $2 per day and he had called it highway robbery and said he would stay home and do the sewing himself before he would pay any such extortion. There were a lot more things, one of them being that he had borrowed a gun and was going out into the country next night to stay ail night and shoot snipe, and, of course, I felt it my duty to tackle him as soon as possible. At the dinner table he was sullen and scowling, and the only time he spoke was when he said: "I see by the papers that this has been a great year so far for the old women to die off." "Yes. it lias," 1 replied, "but I'm left on earth yet. aud I can manage cranks as well as ever." He Stays Home. Directly after dinner I heard him telling Amanda that he'd drop over to the What Is It club for an hour or two and give us a chance to talk, but I crooked my finger at him and said: "Mr. Bowser, that What Is It will wait for you in vain ton^ht Your mother-in-law has arrived, and there are a few things she would like to say to you." "But I don't care to talk," he gruffly replied. "But you will talk just the same. If you want to talk to me here, all right; if you want me to follow you to the club, just put on your hat" He hung in the wind for a minute on/1 +V>r?n oof f^riTcn onH Kocon "crhienpr ing to himself to show that he was not - afraid. Mrs. Bowser motioned me over his head to spare him all I could, but it did not soften my heart. Mr. Bowser is a man who cannot be spared. The only way to deal with him is to crush him. True, he will only stay erusl ed as long as I am in the house, but it has a moral effect afterward. "Mr. Bowser," I presently began. *wfcat Is tbta I bear about tbe gas bill?' "Your daughter has wasted $2 worth to spite me," he replied. "You know better, sir! The idea of a baldheaded man weighing 200 pounds telling any such story as that looks like boy's play. Don't you it some bread and butter with sug~r oil it? You never go down cellar that you don't leave a blaze of light behind you. That's where the gas has gone. You are the most careless man in the world around the house. Let me hear no more about Amanda's extravagance. Now. about this repainting?" ' The house is to have two coats, and I am going to do the work myself, i calculate it will take me two weeks." "Well. I don't calculate it will take you two minutes! The house doesn't need it. and no painting will be done. If you were to daub around here for two weeks your own wife and half of the neighbors would commit suicide." "What! I can't paint my own house if I want to!" he shouted as he got up and began to prance around. His Mother-in-law Scores. "My language was plain, sir! Sit down before you get a crick in the i. . _ rm : 11 - i oacK. JLiiere win iiul um.v ut: uu punning done, but if you want to raise sunflowers and hollyhocks, go and hire a piece of vacant ground. I do not ad mire them, and as I may be here all summer 1 object to having them around." "She may be here all summer!" he groaned to himself. "Having disposed of the hollyhocks and the sunflowers, we will take up housecleaning." I continued. "Amanda will see to that and take about three days, and while she is doing it you can either eat off the kitchen table and sleep on the floor and behave yourself or go to some hotel." "By thunder, woman, I?I"? "That will do. Mr. Bowser! Don't swear at me and don't call me 'woman!% You are red in the face, and your ears are twitching, but it will do no good to get mad. I am the motberin-iaw. I am It!" "Woman, this is too much, too much! I'd like to know"? "Yon will know all as we go along, Mr. Bowser. If you are not very careful of your emotions you will tumble down with apoplexy some day. And now" about the dressmaker. 1 shall go after her the first thing in the morning. Her prices are veij reasonable, and if they weren't it is not up to you to kick. If you want a seven dollar box of cigars, you order them without a qualm. It will be $2 per day for about two weeks, and she won't need your assistance with the darning needle! Me is wuiezea. "1 am told that you have borrowed a gun and are going to the country to shoot snipe at night In the first place, you couldn't hit a barn at ten rods; in the nest snipe don't fly at night; in the third, that gun will be trotted borne in the morning. If there is any running around nights you can run to the theater with Mrs. Bowser. What were you going to say?" "I was going to say, woman." be thickly replied as he flailed his arms about?"I was going to say that my name is Bowser." "Yes." . "And this is my house." "Yes." "And I run things to suit myself. What right have you to come down here and?and"? "The right of the mother-in-law, sir. and that's the best right in the world. One more thing this evening. You were saying you'd drop over to the What Is It club for a coudIo of hours. Well. you won't drop. They will miss you. and they'll be inquiring why is it But let 'em inquire. Your place is right here, and here you will stay. "I am going up to Join Amanda dow, who is a bit nervous, and if you go to banging doors, rattling the furnace or stamping up and down you'll bear from me. You may think it a good time to mend the water pipes, fix a door, experiment on the gas meter or drive nails, but let me assure you to the contrary. These few words this evening are only a sort of a prologue. Tomorrow we will get down to real business and have a thorough understanding." I vanished upstairs, and Mr. Bowser shook his fist after me and tramped around for the next ten minutes like an angry lion. He didn't know whether to burst out a window or break three or four chairs, but at last he flung himself down on the lounge to think It all over. An hour later his wife and I came creeping softly upstairs. We found him asleep and a tear on his cheek. ' - * - * ? -3 ~ Willie llie fin ocrupiru u. ueuiuy cuau and regarded him with looks of sorrow. Rampageous Bowser had been quieted. J A Sign. j iWhen a man asks you for ad- + vice it is a sign that he believes X you will recommend the course + be has decided to take.?Chicago 1 Record-Herald. T Not a Genuine Sport. Old Gent?Gentle disposition! Why, be wants to bite the head off every dog he meets. You've swindled me!" Dealer?Lor" luv yer, guv'nor, you didn't oughter keep dogs at all! Agent with your temperament ought only to go in for silkworms!?Tit-Bits. Up and Down. "That would be great at home when the baby is peevish," remarked Mr. Youngbusband. as he watched the ship's heaving deck. "What's that?" "That deck's a regular Belf walking floor."?Exchange. I Lameness I $ Sloan's Liniment is a quick ^ ft and reliable remedy for lame- 0 'I ness in horses ana other farm p ft " Sloan'3 Liniment surpasses any- nj a thing on. earth for lameness in horses H S and other li<>rso ailments. I would gfl g not sleep without it i:i my stable."? ^ 1 432 West liitli St., New York City. tA Good for Swelling and Abscess. # Mr. if. M. Gibus, of Lawrence, Kan., $5 R. F. L>., No. 3, writes:?" I had a mare m with an abscess on her neck and one ra rj)c. bottleof Sloan's Liniment entirely || cured her. I keep it ail the time for Pp galls and small swellings and for every- r? thing about the stock." & SLOANS LINIMENT is a quick and safe remedy S fnr Lnor rVinlpra 89 Governor of Georgia u?e? ra Sloan's Liniment for Host Cholera. s " I heard Gov. Brown (who is quite a i farmer) say that he had never lost a B hog from cholera and that his remedy fl always was a tablespoonful of Sloan's H Liniment in a gallon of slops, decreas- H ing the dose as the animal improved. fl Last month Gov. Brown and myself [B were at the Agricultural College fl building and in the discussion of tne j? ravages of the disease, Gov. Brown B gave the remedy named as unfailing." fl " Observer." 9 Sava>ttah Daily News. H At All Dealers. 25c., 50c. & 81.00. fl Sloan's Book on Horses, Cattle, ? HogB and Poultry sent free. jS Address Dr. Earl S. Sloan, Boston. |& IRMO NEWS. ' J. H. H " Writes Interestnigiy from that Crowing Town. It is a hard matter to write anything that has not already been written or that everybodjijjDes not already know, unless flragLlras been a fight, or. a killing, o^PRething else sensational and we have had nothing of the kind recently, so that it is plain from the outset that I cannot interest the readers very much. If I write the truth they will not believe it; if I lie, they will catch me in it, and if I write trash they will not read it. It is no use to say anything about the weather, for everybody know9 it behaves like a spoiled child. It is hindering some of the farmers from preparing that brag corn patch to beat the enviable record of Jerry Moore. They have all attended the corn show, and now watch some of them take the belt from Jerry, even if they have to slip around the hill and get some from the other patch. People have been saying for the last fifteen or twenty years that Irmo V _ 1.1. Tl _ J A _ wouia never de anyunng. .due it is still Irmo and growing some. "Uncle Sam" has two R. P. D. routes out from here. Harbinson Agricultural college for negroes is here, and there is considerable business of a mercantile nature. The price of land has advanced to $100 per acre and lots in town that can be bought at all, are very high. The railroad does a fine business. The passenger travel is heavier from this point than from any other station of the same class on the line. All this is something, and, like Micawber, we 8re always waiting for something to turn up. We voted a two mill special levy in this district and now have the best school we have had for years under the principalship of Prof. Stuckey with Miss Eva Bookman as his assistant. We hope this is the beginning of greater interest in education in our community, and, in the near future we may have as good a school as - found in any nine wuuujr tuwu. Miss Leora Hook is teaching in the graded school at Scran ton, S. C.; Prof. J. B. Koon, is Superintendent of the Holly Hill schools; Prof. L. M. Bouknight, is Superintendent of the school at Latta; Miss Eula Mathias holds a position in the Little Mountain school; Miss Shuler and Miss Smith assist at Chapin. The Representative branch of the General Assembly had song services and took a recess of a few days and the hall was disinfected while vacant. Fine idea! Taft says Washington' is a fine place and he had a pleasant time there, sure? Mr. Wilson doubtless will be likewise impressed with the place, There are many others who would be "de-light-ed" to live there as President of the United States. We hope that Mr. Wilson may be overjoyed and that his spirit may in ecstacy rise," and his influence and Dower in behalf of the laboring masses of the people envelope onr nation. Under past administrations the rich have been heaping np wealth and the poor could not live. What we need, and what we hope for, under Wilson's administration is the shutting up of some of the channels through which the rich oppress the poor and the opening up to the toiling millions avenues that will enable them to earn a decent living and arrest their children from the arms of ignorance. J. H. H. ' i Avery THE JEWELEB , ' 1508 Main St., Columbia, S. C. REPAIRS LCJUJL X11IIU WATCHES AND JEWELRY Makes Them Goad as New MEDALS AND BADGES ?- a... n maiiuiaciurei iri uur uwn Shops for Schools and Other Purposes AVERY, The Jeweler 1508 Main St., Columbia, S. C. AM MASTEROF THE OPTICAL BUSINESS My motto is painstaking conscientious Optical service. I have one of the most completely upiiuai uuiucs, xu v/ulumbia. Let me do your optical work and show you how I can serve you. Spectacles and ' Eye-glasses repaired and lenses matched in 30 minutes. Three graduate opticians of many years experience to serve you and we can promise you the highest de- ' gree of accuracy, reliability and satisfaction in all cases entrusted to ^ me. Come and see us, we make no charge for our examination. B. H, Berkman ESTABLISHED 1879. 1418 MAIN STREET, COLUMBIA. S. C. BEAR IN MIND C. D. Kenny Co. Is Headquarters for Sugar, Coffee, Teas, Rice, Etc. Fresb Coffee roasted daily. Don't pat off buying your coffee' and sugar. They're going Higher. _ C. D. KENNEY CO. 1639 Main Street, Phone 157. Columbia, S. C. r , A Watch is \ Valuable When it Keeps Time. If you want your watch to keep Correct Time, see M. WEISS, Watch Repairing a Speciaty ! Also Dealer in Watches and Jewelry. Iioob Assemoiy St., uoiumDia, 5. t.ll FARMS! FARMS! If you want to buy a good farm at right price anywhere in South Carolina, call on or write me. If yon want to sell your farm quick for cash, make your price ^ right and I will sell it for you, no matter where located. I sell choice city nrnnprtu tnr>. r-w( *~j ? Hope A. Dickert, 1507 Main Street, Columbia, - South Carolina, Always Hustling" *4