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ff/^//]f s> f/iS&mff// the tcfror ?* 8tron? oer HUM? (/// takes the joy of life awaj lillKBK/H/ ?pen *? (^a*sse* ////JflflrJj strong purgatives and drugs jaSB j if leave you in a worse conditio* Hi B*? WWn&m wbich be]p ***natural forcc \\\mk\\\ the oIood *** paint \\\\m\l pooklet ati free sai Vv Complete treatment BROWN 7 The Lexington Dispatch. | f-"~/ Wednesday, November 5,1902. i WAS TELLING IT MILDLY. * It Was a Thrilling Recital, but Perfectly Credible. The man from Montana had been Selling a story of a .landslide, how he ^and his cabin .had been carried two IgHimles and escaped all injury, when one EHbf his listeners said: jgfrYon don't mean to say that you BfeBere rushed along with rocks, dirt and jjSISees for two miles and escaped scot 1|?I said so. stranger," was the reply. mm "But it doesn't seem possible." Hp "Were you ever in Montana?" Hb "No." KlF "Got any relatives out there?" 18 "N?." mm "Going out there some time your"Perbaps so." Then you'll find out that any other man in Montana but me would have had that cabin hustled along twice as fast and carried at least ten miles farther!" M. QUAD. Entitled to the Fifty Cents. "When Parson Brownlow was in New York lecturing," remarked a mem-{ ber of one of the posts from that state at Camp Roosevelt "many people grumbled about the high price of ad| mission to hear him. A rich but stingy man, who had been all tbe time profuse with expressions of his patriotism, exclaimed in a crowd: ** 'Give Parson Brownlow half a doli lar? No, sir-ree. I'd a great deal L sooner give it to some- poor soldiers.' "'Oh,' said a bystander, 'then keep Nwour half dollar, for youYe about the JP^poorest soldier I ever knew of.' "The rich man skulked off and didn't hear Brownlow."?Washington Star. His Texisg Problem. The boy was greatly troubled. "Is it true, father," he asked, "that they have whipping posts In some states?" The father assured him that it was. "And they whip grown people?" asked the boy. "When they deserve it," said the fattier. "Well," asserted the boy, with convletion, "if that's the ease I don't see what's the use of growing up."?Chicago Post. A Plunge? In Candy. "Oh, Henry, did youse ever love?" "I did onct, an' it cost me nearly 35 cents.''?New York Journal. An Expert Opinion. "Yes; he started a matrimonial agency and expected to make a lot of money." "Why didn't he?" "He married his typewriter girl inside of a week, and she wouldn't let him go on with the business because it was too dangerou*."?Cleveland Plain f ^Dealer. A little three-year-old wisX.while her vnAthov wo c* tevi rwr tA t- j. . . i.. l and delicate women, I and makes the system \?B?Am jist Nature; do not take \\\^H^k\\\\ t which act for a time, but \\\\ fj?Ba\\\\ i than before. Use a gentle jm I Hm|| LIVER PILLS I IC PELLETS jm is to restore perfect healtit, I//ImaSM/lll the roses on the cheeks, jf J MjEEBj /// I sgMp^y Explanatory. "For a first attempt in public," said her friend encouragingly, "I thought you sang with a good deal of feeling." "I don't wonder at that," replied the i ambitious young vocalist. "My heart was in my throat all the time."?Chicago Tribune. A Common Complaint.. "Now then," said the teacher, "you've heard the explanation of heat and cold. Can you tell me what is light, Tommy?" "My ma says that most everything a that you buy by weight,"?Philadelphia Press. I"-' Making: a Name. Wigg?As a painter do you think he will be able to make a name for himself? *"* A- XT 1,A>? ? wagg?jtie UUgUL IU. 1VU arc, 1JC-o u. sign painter.?Philadelphia Record. Unsteady* Dinkelslosber ? Mike aind't vorking steady now yet, is he? O'Brien?Sc-hure he is. Three days he worrks nights an' three nights he worrks days.?New York Times. * 1 i The Influence. Jerry?How do good clothes make a man a gentleman? Joe?They make him feel as if he was expected to act like one.?Detroit Free Press. A Different Species. "I thought you said. Brown was a i regular bibliomaniac?" "Not on your life! I said he was a bibulous maniac."?Baltimore News. Too Tame! With a disgusted expression the plutocrat steps from his aermobile which has just been steered to the mooring station. "How do you like it?" asked an interested observer. "So good." growls the plutocrat. "Why. the blamed thing goes so high yon can't even scare the pedestrians, let alone run into them."?Baltimore American. Wa? Helpless. "Hey, hey!" yelled the excited neighbor, "there's a robber in your house." "Tou're right" said Mr. Fudge; "I saw him enter." "Did you? Well, you don't seem to be excited over it. Wanter call a policeman and nab the robber?" "No use. It's the man who examines the gas meters."?Baltimore Herald. Probably. "What would you do if you had a million dollars?" "Oh." answered the philosophic citi| zen, "I suppose I'd be like the rest of i humanity. If I were worth a million, U1V/IU<C1 Tf an ujiu^ iv nrtATg Sl?t?p became Interested in a peculiaV^noise *nd asked what it was. ' A cricket, dear," replied lier mother. ''Well," remarked the little lad v. "he. ._ui. v x' J utigUL iu gri niuii^ru vnru. ?auuilg People's Paper. Hit Theory. "There's no doubt that colored men often make good soldiers." "Course dey does," answered Mr. Eraetus Pinkley. "You put a cullud j man along of a pucession an' he's } gwine to foller it to de finish, no matter whut de danger is."?Washington Star. <9 . This signatory if on ererj boa of the genuine 1 Laxative Bronto-Quimnc the remedy fJar t cures * in one ttmj E I'd probably worry myself into dyspepsia trying to make it a billion."?Washington Star. Logical. ' The manager always keeps back a portion of the villain's salary." "Why does he do that?afraid he'd skip?" "No, but he always acts his part better when he's mad."?Boston Post. Softened Grief. Wilson?I lost that fine silk umbrella that 1 carried in town today. Mrs. Wilson?Oh, what a pity! Wilson?Still, there is one consolation. It wasn't mine.?Somerville (Mass.) Journal. In the Jangle. j Lteu?YVbat are you trying to do? Monk?I just want to dust the bric-abrae.?Scrlbner's Magazine. Brrakiif It to Him. "Wei]." asked the anxious young hus- j band. "Is it a boy?" , "Yes, Henry," replied the new grand- j mother: "one of them is."?Chicago Tribune. Practically all the exports of Africa i | are natural products, while her imparts are exclusively manufactured articles. A woman's whim is often a man's fate.?Boston Transcript c ' I CORN Di I Fond Recollection* of the Days of the Hoecake nnd Flapjacks. With good meal and a cook following the lessons and traditions of the oldregime delicious bread may be baked of Indian meal. But we have grave doubts whether it can be baked as well in a stove as in an open fireplace; but, alas, of the latter only a few remain. The ashcake, of course, must have ashes. They are indispensable. As well try to produce a mint julep without mint On the other hand, "flapjacks" need oDly a well greased frying pan, but skill is required to turn them. That is done by pitching them out of the pan into the air and making them come down flap on the other side. The corn pone may be cooked in a stove or range. The hoecake was originally cooked o v?/-ua in tho fields flnfl m the necro VU U AJVV ??? ^ cabin. A skillet will do well enough for it, but must be well greased at the bottom. So, too, with respect to egg or batter bread. As for corn muffins, the appliances of a range are admirably adapted to them. We wish some millionaire would fit up a Virginia country home in antebellum style and among other things have in it a big open fireplace, a black cook in a gingham dress, with a red bandanna on her head, and also have a half acre mint bed. an icehouse and an old time garden filled with raspberries and gooseberries, thyme, sage, currants and all the ordinary table vegetables. . When one of those old time homes and gardens and kitchens is restored and the host and hostess have entered into possession, we desire to be listed as a frequent guest, with a reserved seat in the chimney corner. Then all we shall want will be the zest, the apfVia vnrjir?inn<snpss WP Possessed ? ' - sr r when we could eat eighteen rolls and six eggs for breakfast and consume a whole watermelon between meals. But, alas, it would be easier to restore old walls and open fireplaces than to bring back the digestion and storage capacity of a youth that's gone, of a time that's past and never can return.?Richmond Dispatch. THE COOKBOOK. Put a pinch of bicarbonate of soda in the water when boiling salmon. This makes it a beautiful red color. When roasting fowls, put them into an intensely hot oven until carefully browned: after that cook slowly, basting frequently. When gravy is being made from roast veal, lamb, beef or chicken, use milk instead of water added to the brown drippings left in the pan after the fat bus been poured off. Knl-inrp n Klnafloh +VlQ r>vnrvl A OCiUtC ua&uj^ U uiutiiou IUI. <.1 wib cooks pour over it a sauce made from fresh or canned tomatoes in which garlic is chopped. It is then baked until the flesh of the fish flakes, admitting the sauce. For a quick cake beat until thick four eggs; add four tablespoonfuls of sugar, half a cupful of flour, a little cinnamon and lemon rind; beat well and spread on a baking pan; bake in quick oven and cut at once. Cooking teachers say that the ingredients for pancakes, fritters and the like should be mixed fully two hours before the batter is needed. This, they explain, gives the flour a chance to swell, and the batter is better and more wholesome. A Clerer lior?e. , A great many horses are fed on the streets rrom "catDags' arawn up ever their noses and wabbling about in a manner which must make it very uncomfortable to eat one's dinner in that way. The Boston Herald tells of a bright horse down in "Pie Alley" which had uearly reached the bottom of his bag. It wabbled awfully, but the oats were sweet and he was hungry. In front, of him stood a wagon, and the wagon had a wheel. Happy thought! He walked up to the wheel, rested his canvas bag on the top of it j and finished his dinner to the last oat : in a comfortable, leisurely fashion and ' with a twinkle in his eye. If that was ! not a triumph of mind over matter, ; what was it? , Bor to Keep Young*. One of the secrets of keepiug young, J vigorous and supple jointed is to conj tinue to practice the activities of youth I and to refuse to allow the mind to I stiffen the muscles by its suggestion j of age limitations. If men like I jter j Cooper and William E. Gladstone, who j kept up the vitalizing exercises of robust manhood wben far into the | eighties, bad succumbed at forty to the thought of approaching age, bow much of their valuable life work would have remained undone!?Success. ___________ A Snnetj. "Somehow," said the girl ta blue, "I can't help wishing I had accepted him." "Why, dear?" asked the girl in gray. "Why, he swore that he'd never be | happy again, and I'm afraid he is." I "Ah, yes." commented the girl in I gray reflectively. "As matters are now I you can't be sure that he isn't, hut If | you'd married him you could make ! sure of it"?Chicago Post r Depends on Clreonastsnces. j She?Do you regard marriage as a | necessity or a luxury? | He?Well when a man marries a i cross eyed girl who says silly things, | whose nose turns up at the end and | whose father is worth about $2,000,000, I should say it was a necessity.?Chi! cago Kecord-Herald. I A MttUr For Wonder* Mr*, Teck irrho has returned from ' ? - - - , ' Niagara i?I stood speee&iess? Mr. Peck?Wonderful, wonderful! (To himself)?I wonder how Niagara did it;?Detroit Free Press. _?rL_ ^fflEDFORo^ BUCK-ORJUfGffln ^NST?patic''? Constipation is nothing more ?ijj L|||| than a clogging of the bowels and nothing less than vital stag- ji ^ nation or death if not relieved. ftj bbf If every constipated sufferer 1 ft could realize that he is allowing fij ag poisonous filth to remain in his R system, he would soon get relief. R B Constipation invites all kind of contagion. Headaches, bilious g ness, colds and many other ail- u ments disappear when consti- I I pated bowels are relieved. Thed- I ford's Black-Draught thoroughly | ft cleans out the bowels in an easy fi I and natural manner without the purging of calomel or other vio- I ft lent cathartics. ft Be sure that you get the origi- 5 & nal Thedford's Black-Draught, M ? made by The Chattanooga Jledi- ? W cine Co. Sold by all druggists in rj| 25 cent and $1.00 packages. Morgan, Ark., Mar 2o, 1901. ffl } I cannot recommend Thedford's Black- fi| Dranghttoo highly. 1 keep It In my house jn all the time and hare used It for the last : :; ten years. 1 nerer gare my children any other laxative. 1 think 1 could never be able to work without It M on account of being troubled with m constipation. Your medicine Is all that keeps me up. C. B. McFARLASD. By resoluti on tbe Joint Council o* Bethel Pastorate will be held at the parsonage at White Rock each Thanksgiving Day. Dr. George B. Cromer, of Newberry College, has promised to be one of the speakers. Others will be invited. All the members and friends of Bethel Pasi??i? ??? inTiifo^l tr\ ottond until IUIU to &1 C 1UTUUU IV 14 WbVUV* T? * VM baskets. Come ever, Mr. Editor. S. C. B. A HILTOIT'S Lough cure, U A SYRUP. Unique?unlike any other cough preparation. The quickest to stop a cough and to remove soreness from the lungs. 25c. THE MUBBAY DBUG CO., COLUMBIA, 8. C. For Sale at THE BAZAAB. Aug. 18?ly. ZIIZZZZZIZIIZZZZilZZIL <! m frcit trees ] mhS? That Grow and Bear Prnit. Write (or our 80 page 11W&* lustrated Catalogue and 40 nacfA rmmnhlet. "HOW to ^ |f*lant and Cultivate an Orchard," Gives you that in/ajsSjRfc. formation you have so long wanted; tells you all about ''MB those biff red apples, lucious peaches, and Japan plums with their oriental sweetness, all of which you have often wondered where the trees ^me *rom tbat produced EVERHHINQ ^ GOOD IN Unusal fine stock of SILYER r>K MAPLES.young, thrifty trees 4smooth and straight, tho kind that live and grow ofT well, ; ^^^r^V^No old, rough trees. This is i ^p^c^^the most rapid growing ina?^ l)le and one of the mostbeau^E^f^fejtiful shade trees. Write for prices and give i list of wants. J. Van Lindley Nursery Co.. Pomona, N LIFE HID FIDE INSiiNCE IEEH COUNTRY RISKS CONSIDERED. Only First Clsss Companies Represented. See my List of Giants: Assets. NEW YORK LIFE, of New York 293,743,38G ' GLENN FALLS, of Glecn Falls, N?w York 3,605,602.23 PHILADELPHIA UNDERWRITERS. Phil.. Pa.. 15,541,066 CONTINENTAL (Fire), of New York 12,0 5.723.72 iETNA, FIRE, of Hartford, Conn $14,071,948.37 My companies axe popular, strong and reliable. No one can give your business better attention; no one can give yon better protection; no one can give you better rates. BEFORE YOU INSURE 8EE ALFRED .T. FOX, . General Insurance Agent, i LEXINGTON S. C. November 27, 1901?ly. Parlor Restaurant 1336 MAIN STREET. COLUMBIA, - S. C., The only up-to-date eating ' House ot its kind in the City of Co- i lnmbia. It is well kept?clean linen, prompt and polite service and get it quickly. Quiet and order always prevail. \ou gtt what yon order and pay only for whnt you get. Within easy reach of desirable sleeping apartments. OJ?JEIV ALL NIGHT. B. DAVID, Proyiietor. be .a a rl eg +3 O Q I " s S aBa 0 ? I ?3 tsa ^ 53 * ea ^ 0 tQ JC -p "gw f? *"""' "*' ' \ HrH rj J _ IB * legs S IX. M SamagMMMIi ^ O gg ? ? K 3 a Si W 2 g (J jj^ hi* s s isL _5 ?T (fl Cu A a ?3? ? P^Hg / OQ O Soil Carolina Marble f orb; 17?7 MAIN ST., COLUMBIA, S. C. -ipggaag^A The Largest Betail S MARBLE AND GRANITE Dealers South. We use the best grade material in manufactnriug Monuments and Headstones and guarantee our work ?b4 flinish to be the best. When you hear a man oomplain- a' ing that he can buy so much cheaper from some little fellow who is anxious to sell anything, you can put it down that ha will get cheap stock, cheap work, and of course a cheap job. We can compete with any fair dealer in this country, but we cannot say we will sell as cheap as some as we do not care work. IRON b WIRE FENCING, GRAVE LOT COPING, ETC., for sale. Write to us or see our MR. P. B. EDWARDS, LEXINGTON, S. C. and we will see that you are treated fair. SOUTH CAROLINA MARBLE WORKS. September 1J. 44?tt HUSEMANN'S GUN STORE WE HAVE Parker, Lefevers, Smith, Ithaca, Fore hand, Fieper, Baker and Winchester Repeating Shot Guns. rhe Ithaca Guns are guaranteed to shoot all kind* ot Smokeless Powders; Dever bee?*?loose or shaky. Price* from $21 np. We keep the best makes of Single Barrel Gnus. Ill kinds of Kihes and Air Guns, Powder, Shot, Wads, Primers, Shells, Loaded Shells ru all 6i-7.es. Edison Phonographs, and Graphaphones. We do all kinds of Bepair Work. Head-quarters for Hunters' Supplies. W. F. STIEGLITZ, PROPRIETOR. I 508 MAIN STREET, COLUMBIA, S. C. September 17, 1902?16w. i _