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Quigxnans ♦ By Buddy Hickmon "WHy DO you PlRAT<?5 ALWAYS HAve T«e on& bum eye ? ” " 7He. parrots Peep 'cm out ’ Fishbowl ♦ By Robert Witchger I'too yt*ov<TXiS tioo v: ' to &^ov) Op t^6 v^oK’X &c- nvjeH A *4 kxt^-kctao»4 v*w»* we's * &\*t-\T , <£uottfee*V*G», Ft€»t- vn^srrefc fr\ i rVi f^\ \ i \'n— W.\c.VC OvlX oNTo T>\£ , Go ^M-V^ To T\ve <s^\«crer«L Ger a» Hew oN & . \J\CBUo-f, 'fov* A,u-e <iv»CH A. ... A • • • ... Sv»Ct\ vjs/ONb£«ffML u*fc ow'l Po^ v.e'ino^e, ^►NWiG s*ctf , fM h- cU^Tfr t>o<i . _ \ rr\ \ The Family Monster ♦ ByjoshShaiek THE PRESIDENT (wqrctas on.) —~ii—-' f'ty'Y dots eve/-yfkWq'> kWe. to Mq4 o^'l Paul ♦ By Billy O’Keefe www.fnrbilly.cotn «£</, THEBE’S SOHETHIN6J ON VOU^jMO^y--f / /T'SAHEABT. CM AS KIN6 VOtl JO******- • DINNEB VIA A 6BAND BOMANTIC 6ESTUBE.|j AND VOU'RE ANNOUNCING IT AS A 6RAND ROMANTIC GESTURE, WHICH OF COURSE HURTS THE 6RANDNESS OF IT ALL. VBAH. PBOBABLV SHOULDN’T MENTIONJ TUB Z^fOK - IJ.OUPONJHBN.JT-^^^ NOT OUT LOUD, NO. You are Here ♦ By Aaron Warner Everyone thought Bill Junior had a lot of great ideas, but actually he was ju&t too cheap to buy a lampshade. CROSSWORD ACROSS 1 Restaurant greeter 8 Diplomatic envoy 15 Improve 16 Prime cut 17 Canted sheds 18 Away from land 19 Beaver project 20 Clever trick 22 Increases gradually 23 In a melodious manner 26 Like earlier LPs 29 Repentant 30 Wise man 34 Foolishly imitative 36 Zaps in a microwave 38 Moray_ 39 Sweet, undiluted juice 41 Holy 43 Wrath 44 Leavening agent 48 Stability 49 Senior citizens’ grp. 51 Conclusive evidence 53 Woodlands ruminant 54 Down Under 57 Grave robber 60 Work on text 61 Verve 64 Oven-cooked 67 Slant 69 Fiery hot spot 70 Level of command 71 Note or letter 72 Wallflower’s affliction DOWN 1 Restrained 2 SSS classification 3 False front 4 Summer color 5 Doorway 6 Removes by scrubbing 7 Congressional sitting 8 Mooncalf 9 Draw 10 Use a dragnet 11 Forever 12 Wheedle 13 Add employees 14 Terminates 21 Buff color 23 _and found 24 Flood haven 25 Soap ingredients 26 Craze 27 Word with soap or horse 28 More pleasant 31 Eaglet’s abode 32 Gaggle members 33 Mormon leader 35 Dry feed 37 Maple drippings 40 Workout figs. 42 Closing measure 45 Fine work 46 Tender 47 Fawning sycophants 50 Temporary stops 52 Draw back 55 To the extreme 56 Irritating 57 Joyless 58 Sharpen 59 Blockheads 61 Stack 62 Son of Seth 63 Writing tools 65 H.S. subj. 66 Rabbit mama 68 Novelist Deighton © 2005 Tribune Media Services, Inc. 03/25/05 All rights reserved. Solutions HOROSCOPES . Aries You’re smart and strong and very cute, but you still can’t bi-locate. Don’t try to cram too much into the day. You’ll wear yourself out. Taurus It’s not a good day to gamble or take risks of any kind. Focus instead on your paperwork. There’s plenty of that to be done. Gemini There are still a few raw nerves on edge, but they’ll calm down as the day continues. If the matter hasn’t been resolved by tomorrow, don’t worry about it. They’ll soon forget all about it. Cancer You can retain most of what you learn, in detail, now. Take on a complicated subject just for the fun of it. Leo The more you learn, the more you realize you don’t know a thing. That’s not a reason for concern. Your life’s getting more complex. Virgo Unpleasantness at home could put you into a foul mood. Don’t turn a molehill into a mountain by making a big deal of it. Forget about it. Libra Everything you read in books won’t work. Be prepared to think on your feet when necessary. Imagination is required. Scorpio Postpone a shopping trip. If you wait, you’ll have less tendency to spend on things you don’t even want or need just because they’re on sale. Sagittarius Life should be rolling along nicely, but it’s not a good time to take risks. Keep your arms inside the windows and your attitude optimistic. Capricorn Bad news is good news, in a way. Finding out one more thing that won’t work narrows it down. Now all you have to do is test everything else. Aquarius You’re very involved in making sure other people have what they need. Don’t give away more than you can afford, however. First, take care of your own. Pisces Discuss with your partner what you’ll do with all the money. Don’t do that while you’re on the job, however. Minimize distractions. CALENDAR Evergreen Terrace With Casey Jones, She Walks in Beauty, Holden Caulfield: 4 p.m. New Brookland Tavern. 122 State St. $10. All ages. $7. “Postmen in the Mountains”: 7, 9 p.m. Nickelodeon Theatre, 937 Main St. “The Passion of the Christ”: 8 p.m. Russell House Theater. SATURDAY Evergreen Terrace with Casey Jones, She Walks in Beauty, Holden Caulfield: 4 p.m. New Brookland Tavern. $10 advance. All ages. Hype Night with Gram 21, Billy Pilgrim, Twindividuals, The Eyes of the Elders: 9:30 p.m. New Brookland Tavern. $5. Jeff Lucero of Name Dropper with Berg: 9 p.m. Jammin’ Java. A pay-what-you-want show. “Jesus Christ Superstar": 9 p.m. Headliners. $7. Confederate Fagg Reunion: Art Bar, 1211 Park St. “Postmen in the Mountains”: 3, 7, 9 p.m. Nickelodeon Theatre. “The Passion of the Christ”: 8 p.m. Russell House Theater. SUNDAY TODAY Jam Room Showcase with The Jones (formerly Smokey Jazzbah), Roni Zagoria and the Whole Lotta Man Band, Fastest Steed on Earth, Xilcoy: 9 p.m. New Brooklana Tavern, 122 State St. $5 over 21, $7 under. Scott Ivey with Adam Whiting: 9 p.m. Jammin’ Java, 1530 Main St. A pay-what-you want show. “Jesus Christ Superstar”: 9 p.m. Headliners, 700 (Jervais St. Viva Voce with Damn. The Sun, Kings of Mexico: 8 p.m. New Brookland Tavern. $6. “Postmen in the Mountains”: 3, 7, 9 p.m. Nickelodeon Theatre. “The Passion of the Christ”: 3 p.m. Russell House Theater.