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Farmers for the By Ward Borden Qam?cocK STaff Writer "About all I do around here is es and help out when I can," said Eai Mathews. Mathews makes it clea that his wife Doris Mathews run the show, explaining that a heat attack a few years ago has limite his activity in the business. The couple manage Doris' Produce, a retail produce stand a the State Farmers Market. S many fresh fruits and vegetable in one place makes the stan i racuiuic <111 u a sib in a uesen i fast food, frozen to death, an microwaved back to life. In tha oasis, sitting behind the produc scales, Mathews, a somewha chunky man with short croppe hair and a dark tan, begins t -J9P MichaeH^/ Mart By Mark Platte Steve Martin is a passir novelty. First you want to hear h jokes, then you want to see him concert and on television, and th< you want to act like him. He appear on "Saturday Night Liv< one night, and the next day evei person and his brother is imitatii him Tf vnii'vf* "dvpnco rrw ^ V/AVUOV nn once, you've heard it a millii times. Steve Martin is too commerci< By making himself so accessible Vug market, a i best prodi explain the workings of the market as he eats a cheeseburger, it "We sell anything the farmer "1 needs here. We've got drinks and r canned goods, Vienna sausages is and candy. Whatever a farmer *t wants while he's here, we can sell d him," said Mathews. He added that many farmers who set up ~?1 ~ -A. *- -fA ? s men wiiuicsaie suiiius are unen it hungry or thirsty and come over o for a drink or snack. He explained s that Doris's Produce and most of d the other retailers at the market >f buy their fresh produce from d farmers or wholesalers, and adds, it "Some of them will tell you they're e farmers but I don't consider a it backyard garden a farm." d The farmers market is o segregated into areas for retail enjoys an apple in's 'Cc the public, he is crucifying his chance to make himself last in the lg ail-too-fickle world of en is tertainment. Obviously it's hard tc in create jokes which appeal to mosi ?n everyone, which Martin does. Bui '11 by being bombarded with his i" omnipresent "crazy" personality ry you tend to become immune to his lg thin, sometimes ridiculous fillei material. )n Steve Martin is a tremendou! money-maker. He is supported b} il. fans who shell out money for hi! to amums, posters and concerts, it % ^iflP' IHiMiMllfcf'ifiii iniiiiii 111 diV ' way of life ice price stores and wholesale stores. Ac 1! ? If ^ 11 ^ ...U/v coming iu mauiews, a ituiuei wnu is set up in the wholesale area can sell produce in quantities no less than half a bushel. The retailer can sell as little or as much as he wants, distinguishing him from the wholesaler. People who set up shop in one of the stands, rent the space from the state. They also pay SCE&G for utilities and Southern Bell if they have a phone, like any other business. Who Doris's Produce buys from depends on the time of the year. "We get most of our apples from North Carolina, and some from South Carolina, Virginia, and Tennessee. Most of the pecans come from Georgia. The season here is roughly May through August, we Duy produce irom me local farmers (South Carolina) during that time. In the other months we buy from wholesalers, "We get a lot of fruit from Florida," said Mathews. During the South Carolina growing season, the retailers in the market are not the only ones to buy from local farmers. Wholesalers from all over the Southeast come to buy fresh produce. A graphic example of the laws of supply and demand exists, in which wholesalers from different areas buy and sell produce according to their different climates and seasonal peaks. Virginians need South Carolina okra (sometimes called okrie), and South Carolinians need * Virginia apples. If one pictures a j lot of mind-boggling wheeling and s dealing they are getting warmer. * It is a big business. "This is the weakest year we've I had in six years," said Mathews. | "The weather caused problems | and the quality of the produce 31 hasn't been as good this year. Gasoline is part of it too." >medy' i no joke when Martin announce: ; during a performance that "If yoi appeal to everyone, it's more .. ) money." t His last two comedy album L were classic successes. Let's Ge 5 Small and Wild and Crazy Gu , were typical Martin, with all th 5 routines that made him famous r The problem was that withou seeing Martin, you'd find it hard t 5 relate to some of the "corned / gags," but the rest of the joke s were funny in some spots an s hilarious in others. Those two albums gave us sue humorous hits as "Excuse Me, "Mad at My Mother," "Ramblir Guy," "Cat Handcuffs," "Yo naive Americans," as well as hi first hit single, "King Tut." Ui fortunately, after the first fe< listenings, you disregard the joke and begin to pick up all the ii significant details so you can recil them while you're playing th album for a friend. Let's face it, if you're a Stev Martm tan and you teel compellc to watch him on every show Y appears, which is about twice week, you will inevitably ha\ heard every joke on his album. H inability to create fresh, ne material for his albums is aided t his laziness. His latest effort, Comedy is N Pretty is the best of the thn albums so far although some of tl bits are overdrawn and uninspire The album begins with "Born be Wild" in which Martin rush< through routines about having h face removed from the inside of glass, having his name changed Gern Blanston, changing h r ; .. giggjf v /;vvJ3 mm IM1MB11 mi ffipjfi Dmf v ;. :>>^PRP^ { ^SS"S' ' :^B^--'. '' ^M^"':'> Ear Food co-ops, groups of famili who pool their funds and buy lari quantities of produce fro wholesalers, have also hurt reti business according to Mathews. < course farmers and wolesale rlrtn wiin/4 n ki4 uuu i iiiiiivi <x mi. In addition to the co-ops and tl poorer quality produce this yet Mathews had another complair "pinhookers." "Pinhookers set in the farmers area over there a sell any amount of produce th want. People think that they' wholesalers. They set up for thr months of the season, while we' is not s lifestyle by buying a house li getting married in every city tours, and wearing loafers to wl he responds by singing "Born t< s Wild." t The second section, "The y Being" is one minute and e seconds of Martin telling the cn at the Boarding House in it Francisco, "1 don't try to set Y _ i_ if ? ? u goais ior mysen ? 1 only wan y be the all-being: master of ti s space and dimension. Then I w d to go to Europe." "McDonald's/Men's 1 h derwear'' opens with the comec " telling how he was thrown out < r McDonald's by accidentf u starting a grease fire by throw is a match in the cook's hair. T i- Martin relates his sexual fanta w buying and wearing men's is derwear. i- "Drop Thumb Medley" is te refreshing break from Mart ic humor. It is a two-minute b? piece which adds something to re dullness of side one. >d Perhaps the best cut on side le is "Googlephonics," in wl a Martin is totally unsatisfied \ re the quality of a stereo with is speakers. He advances to four w and 1,000 speakers before he b >y the "googlephonic" with 4 highest number of speakers be: ot infinity." se Side two opens with le ingenious "Cruel Shoes" from a. dook of the same name. It i to gruesomely funny story of a pa es shoes. The pair consists of two for feet. One with a right angle 1 a which has the toes turn in to possible directions, the other, is inches long, shaped like a cur v ?MM I Mathews es here ten to twelve months. I hope ge someone puts an end to it.'' m Mathews has worked at the lil produce stand for six years, but Of has known the produce field much rs longer.4'I was born on a farm and I spent 25 years hauling produce." hie While Mathews speaks his wife ir, moves about selling vegetables, it: drinks, and fruit. Two men come in up looking at various bushel baskets. nd Mathews starts over to them but ey turns and says, "Glad to help you re out," then sensing my thoughts ee adds, "Oh, and grab an apple re there." jJi^LLy and rocking chair with a vice and razor he to hold the foot in place. lich "Comedy is not pretty" and :>be "How to meet a girl" are useless and "Rubberheads" would be fine All- if you could see Martin throwing a 21 fish, but the visual part hurts this i _ i n 3Wa SKU. San "Jackie O and Farrah FM and ligh "You can be a Millionaire" are the t to same jokes Martin has told on me, television shows and aren't too 'ant funny to begin with. Even though this is Martin's U n - best, it is hardlv a landmark effort. lian New material would help for Steve of a but his audience doesn't care. As illy long as the fans take Martin, ring Martin will take his fans. >sy: I _ ! un- 9 in's injo one [;- J >? :: iH'ij turn six I | %Sfi|i?Sll|a 'ved |:?:,lf" Hr " i