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- TIIK CAMDEN JOURNAL 1 VOLUME 3. CAMDEN, SOUTH-CAROLINA, JUNE 25, 1852. NUMBER 51. | r?saw? i .. THE (LAMDEN JOURNAL. rjr-a _ ? published semi-weekly and weekly by THOMAS J. WARREN. t = ! / TERiHS. ^ The Semi-Weekly Journal is published at Tliree ' : Dollars and Fifty Cents, if paid in advance, or Four tf Dollars if payment is delayed three months. / The Weekly Journal is published at Two Dollars j , - . if paid in advance; Two Dollars and Fifty Cents if pay- I . - meat be delayed three months, and Three Dollars if not : "** Tvais tfu3l tlm nvninition of the vear. ADVERTISEMENTS will be inserted at the follow- [ L,^ lag terms: For one Square (fourteen lines or less) in the j P*"~ ~ semi-weekly, one dollar for the first, and twenty-five j f , cents for each subsequent insertion. In the weekly, | J; seventy-five cents per square for the first, and thirtv-se- j ? vea. and a half cents for each subsequent insertion. Sin- 1 iinsertions one dollar. Seini-monthly, monthly and j f. j/v " quarterly advertisements charged the same as for a sin'' V gle insertion. ?; S3T"The number of insertions desired, and the edition to be published in must be noted on the margin of HF all advertisements, op they will be published semi-week- ! ' ly uaXil ordered discontinued and charged accordingly Bom the Register. ONE HOUR WITH THEE. I' * One hour with Thee, Creator! when at morn ' The crimson beams illume the eastern sky, I?... " J__-| <"-"J>eioce me aauy wcigm ui >.uic jo UUiw<-, Grant that to Thee my longinging soul may fly, I And with an humble faith to Thee may bear j S Its morning sacriiice of praise and prayer. ; One,hour with Thee, O Saviour"! when at noon, 1 - ^ The weary pause to rest from toil and care, I My thoughts pray tuin from scenes of grief and ' gloom ] ' ' To rest on Thee, who once the weight didst bear 1 Of human woe, that man might iearn from Thee j To reach Thy home, from sin's dominion free , One hour with Thee, O Holy Spirit! Night j Brings calmness, thought, to all the race of man, , Descend, I pray, on dove-like pinions light, >v Dwell in my heart, that when this narrow span * . ' Of life is o'er, my soul may rise above, 1 To dwell forever in a Heaven of Lovei \ S ? r ***" * J P THE HOURS. 1 'Qt BT WILLIAM C. BRYANT. The hours are viewless angels 1 \ . And still go gliding by; sk. ./ And bear each moment's record up S^- To him who sits on high. v*-";' The poison or the nectar, v':_ ' Our hearts deep flower cups yield >. ' A sample still they gather swift, And leave us iu the field. And some fly by on pinions Of gorgeous gotil tMwl t?Sufl And some fly on with drooping wing ~s fcv Of sorrows darker hue. c v. - And as we spend each minute n That God to us hath given, The deeds are known before his throne? 'n The tale is told in Heaven, a ' < And we who talk among ?hera, f As one by one departs, ( Think not that they are hovering c Forever round our hearts. , < Like summer bees that hover t Around the idle flowers, They gather every act and thought, 1 These viewless atigel hours, s ] . And still they steal the record, < And near it far away; J This mission flight by day or night, , .... , No magic power can stay. Rn toarh Ifpavenlv Father, * To spend each Hying hour, I That, as they ?o, they may not show 1 My heart a poison flower. ] L- w. The Penitent malefactor. ' BY REV. THOS. SCOTT. . ft The narrative of the crucifixion abound with 1 I interest. Putting aside the mighty eveut itself, j B the sufferings of Messiah, the viearous sacrifice? t the narrative abounds with collateral circuinstan- i 9 ces well calculated to fasten the attention?cirH cumstanees at once interesting and profitable.? pf Omitting the transactions in the garden of Geth- j semene?in the palace of the high priest,and bcf fore the tribunals of Pilate and Herod let us on[. ly glance at the facts connected with the actual i crucifixion. How remarkable are many ofthem! : The compiling of Simon to bear the cross after I Jesus, with the mystical lesson taught thereby? , iiTr "*?ll nftpr me. let him deny < r r "II nuj lllnn mil iv.<. ? , Lj'vhimself, and take up his cross and follow me."? The lamentation of Jesus over the Jews?"I)augh^ . ters of Jerusalem, weep cot for me, but weep for ^ft yourselves and for your childn The cominending of the virgin to the beloved John. 'Die fulfilhnent of the prophecies in the division of the raiment. The miraculous darkness. ThedreadB ful taunt of the scribes and priests?the taunt yet containing in itself- a blessed truth?"He saved E others, himself he cannot save." The hitter cry ?. ?"My God1! my God! why hast, thou forsaken me?" The voluntary death of Jesus?voluntary k' even in the last article?"When Jesus had cried ft with aloud voice"?unexhausted?in full strength ft ?"When Jesus had cried with a loud voice, he said, I Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit;and P having said thus, he gave up the ghost." The I # mysterious reeding of the veil of the temple, the haL. way into the holiest being now made manifest. FThe first Gentile confessor?" When the centurion saw what was done, be glorified God, saying, truly this was a righteous man;" what or under ^ i the circumstances, was implied in the former. "Truly this was the Son of God." The open'ng of the graves?the rising of the bodies of the saints, and their appearing in the holy city?the coming forth of the timid Nicodemus, and the 1 i < Trtc^nh These area few of fl.? S Deiore uiiniiv?"?v~r? . E circumstances which arrest our attention in the I several'narratives ot the crucifixion. These, it is L frtlfi y'"?or circumstances, and may appear m "*"S^wlutely unw^K^y of notice, as compared with the mighty sacrifice^jd the infiuite atonement; I *\ yet it is there in every one of tliem, and that without force or fancy, matter for the most profitable reflection; and well it is for us, and a mark of a state of heart much to be desired, if we gather benefit from tiiese smaller and less prominent facts recorded in Holy Scripture, f ancy and frivolity in interpreting the Scripture are always to be shunned; but well is it for him who remembers tW oi-hpv cr>nt<i?if>A lins ifs annrnniinlft mid ilTl- I porlant meaning, and that "by every word"? every narration, as well as every doctrine?"by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of the Lord doth man live." In our enumeration of the interesting circumstances connected with the crucifixion of our Lord, we have omitted one, and thatoneof the most remarkable?the narrative of the two malefactors?the blasphemer and ' the penitent. A narrative is this, of great sim- . plicity and great brevity, and yet are there shadowed out in it many of the most important doctrines and deepest mysteries of the Gospel. In a certain degree I would consider the whole narra- J tive as my subject, though I have only read to you a few words as my text. These words how- ( 6ver appear, perhaps, the most important of the s whole, and will, accordingly, receive the most of i my attention; and after explaining the history, ( with a few practical remarks in passing, I would t dwell more fully on the prayer?its extended < meaning?its universal application?its never- s failing success?and may God, the giver of re- r pentance, and of every other good gift, grant us t both to understand this portion of his word, and s to imitate the repentance, andt o utter the pray- a jr, and to receive the pardon, "Lord, remember me, when thou comest into thy kingdom." The i narrative calls for our first attention; the narra- t hit?i wifK o noccMinr r?Ammfint Wlinn r?iir T,nr/1 t was crucified, lie was not crucified alone; there o were crucified with him two thieves?the one on v ;he right and the other on the left. Our Lord, o brsooth, as the greatest criminal, was placed in ( ,he midst. The Scripture was fulfilled, "he was lumbered with the transgressors." The sons of t Sebedee had besought him, that they might be s ilaced, the one on his right and the other on his ti eft. "It is not mine to give," said the Saviour, h ' but to them for whom i,t is prepared of my fa- F her." But of that post, whom did the Jews g Link worthy? How unfathomable is the depth S| >f human depravity! In the annals of nations 0 ve seldom find an instance in which the great- S| ist malefactor, when led to execution, receives my thing of insult. In almost every case his 't] xime is forgotten in his punishment; and the nultitude are rather disposed to pity than to in- ti ult. But well may be put into the mouth of p he Saviour the words of Jeremiah with regard vi o Jerusalem "yn ??nvun- la*--? * ** orrowT1 All the spectators, as if by common a onsent, made our Lord an exception to this gen- tl ral rule; they added mockery to his sufferings, tl 'he scribes and priests, the professors of learning j> ind religion, united with the populace to revile g ind taunt. Nor was this scorn confined to tliem. |; )ne of the malefactors could forget his own suf- a fliA AAmmAn nrr 1 WO of the I illlU JViii cuu vvuiiiivii v.j. - -- - - - . jvangelists appear to assert that such was the i I :ase with both, but there seems reason to doubt p .vhother this is necessarily implied in their words: ti 4one of the malefactors" one of them at least, p 'railed on him, saying, if thou be Christ save 0 .hyself and us." What depravity, we naturally o lay, was here! what dislike of the Saviour!? * [Brethren, remember how different have been our p iircumstances from those of this unhappy being, [t is probable?far more probable, from his cha- I acter and occupation, that he had never been ^ ivithin the sound of salvation?that no kind in- c struction?no pious warning?no blessed invita- t :ion had ever reached his ears. And yet, per- c naps, there may be found among us those who love our Lord and his gospel little better than v he did! Such then, was one of the malefactors; f hut were both alike ? Divine love made a differ- c mice: God, as one has observed, is the only being who can gratuitously love; from his gratuitous love comes all our hope. Repentance was t given to one of the malefactors. He rebuked j his follow, saying, 44 Dost thou not fear God, see- ( ing thou art in the same condemnation ? Arid a we indeed justly; for we receive the due rewards j of our deeds; but this man has done notb- t ing amiss." And he 6aid unto Jesus, "Lord, ) remember mo when thou coinest into thy king- ( dom." Hero, on the cross, was repentance and its fruits?conviction of sin?application to Je- ; sus, and proofs of a renewed heart in glorification [ of the Saviour, and reprbof of evil. There was j conviction of sin?"we indeed justly, for we re- ( coive the due reward of our deeds." No exteuu- ( ation?no denial?the sinfulness of the penitent* } contrasted with the holiness of the Redeemer? t "we, indeeJ, justly, but this man hath done no- { uiing amiss." brethren, without this conviction } of sin, this confession of the justice of our sen- \ tence, there can be no real penitence?1 say not ( that it is necessary to understand this justice to | be able to explain why God's sentence against sin is just, but yet we must allow it, and receive j it meekly, without a murmur. " We, indeed, j . * ' -> e. justly." MarK iurmcr?mere was a coiiii-roiyu of the divinity of Christ. For what was the alleged crime of Jesus? It was blasphemy. Now, if Jesus were not indeed God, the accusation j against liirn was just. He was a blasphemer, j and deserved to die. But no, said the penitent, " this man has done nothing amiss." He is no blasphemer, and therefore he is God. " Whosoever believcth that Jesus is the Christ, is horn , of God." A true, real, and practical belief in this tilth must spring from divine illumination. Such belief had the penitent, and it brought him to Jesus in earnest prayer?"Lord remember nie when thou comest into thy kingdom." The penitent was at the point of death?the Saviour too, was just giving up mortality. Earthly king-i? :? .,.?D ninur that, there was none: what the UUJil H n <vo vivi?> v...? t penitent knew of the real kingdom we cannot tell?certainly he knew enough. And oh! what a holy boldness was there in his prayer! The Saviour in the agonies of crucifixion?his soul racked with anguish, and shall he think of the poor malefactor even then? Still less we might suppose, shall he think of him when he enters into his kingdom?when he is surrounded with his angel-guards?when he is seated at the right hand of Power. Yes) true grace is full of wonder. It is a beautiful union of contraries; it unites humility with confidence,?debasement with exaltation?"We, indeed, justly," and yet " Lord, remember me." A REVOLUTIONARY RELIC. The following interesting document was recently found among the papers of Maj. John Jacob Scluuefmyer, a deceased patriot of the Revolution. It is a discourse delivered on the eve of the battle of Brandywine, by Rev. Jacob Frout, to a large portion of the American solliers, in presence of Gen. Washington, Gen. Wayne, and other officers of the army: Revolutionary Sermon. " They that take the sword, shall perish by the noord." Soldiers and Countrymen: We have met this iveuing, perhaps for the last time. We have shared the toil of the march, the peril of the fight, md the dismay of the retreat alike, we have enlured the cold and hunger, and contumely of ,he internal foe, and the courage of the foreign >ppressor. Wc have sat, night after night, beide the camp fire; we have together heard the oil of the reveille, which called us to duty, or he tattoo, which gave the signal for the hardy ' leep of the soldier, with the earth for his bed 1 ina the knapsack for his pillow. i And now, soldiers and brethren, we have met n the peaceful valley on the eve of battle ; while < he sunlight is dying away beyond yonder heights, I he sunlight that will glimmer tomorrow morn m scenes of blood. We have met, amid the rhitening tents of our encampment; in thft time ( f terror and gloom have we gathered together? Jod grant that it may not be the last time. f It is a solemn moment. Brethren, does not f be solemn voice of nature seem to echo the Lax. 7 Tl,a?aa.af ?? j ii j.'ciLuiua \jl uic nuui r xuc nag v/i uui uuuu- ^ ry droops heavily from yonder staff? the breeze r as died away along the green plain of Chadd's urd?the plain heights of the Brandywine arise . looniily and grand beyond the water of yonder s Iream, all nature holds a pause of solemn silence, N n the eve of the uproar and bloodshed and j trife of tomorrow. t " They that take the sword, shall perish by r lie sword." And have they not taken the sword ? Let , le desolated plain, the blood sodden valley, the urned farm-house blacken in the sun, the sacked ,3 illage, and the ravaged town, answer?let the jlong the fields of his homestead answer?let r le starving mother with her babe clinging to f le withered breast that can afford no suste- s anee, let her answer with the death rattle min r ling with the murmuring tones that marked the ) 1st struggle of her life ; let the dying mother nd her babe answer. t Now, God of mercy, behold the change! r 'nder the shadow of a pretext, under the sancti ( y of the name of God. invoking the Redeemer j their aid, do these foreign hirelings slay our eople! They throng our towns?they darken ur plains?and now they encompass our posts n the lonely plain of Chadd's Ford. J " They that take the sword, shall perish by J be sword." Brethren think me not unworthy of belief when tell you the doom of the British is near. Think ' ne not vain when I tell you that beyond the ' loud that now enshrouds us, I see gathering 1 hick and fast, the darker cloud and blacker storm ' if Divine retribution. They may conquer us tomorrow. Might Mid I erong prevail, and wc may be driven from the ' ield; but the hour of God's ouu vengeance will J ome! Ay, if in the vast solitude of eternal space, ( f in the heart of the boundless universe, there "i hrobs the being of an awful God, quick to avenge, ! md sure to punish guilt, then will the ruan ieorge Brunswick, eailed King, feel in his heart ' md brain the vengeance of the eternal Jehovah ! 1 V blight will be upon his life?a withered brain '< ind an aocursed intellect; a blight will bo upon < lis people and on-Jniwhildren. Great God, how * lread the punishment. 1 A crowded populace, peopling the dense towns it-- " iKnfiic wtlilo 1r- I I'nCTC lilt; IIlclll Ul uiuucy Uimv^ miiuv >orer starves ; want striding among the people n all its forms of terror ; an ignorant and God- 1 lefying priesthood, chuckling over ttfl miseries , >f millions, a proud and mercilesss nobility, idding wrong and heaping insult upon robbery md fraud ; royalty corrupt to the heart, and iristocracy rotten to the very core ; crime and .vant linked hand in hand, and tempting men x> deeds of woe and death ?these are a part )f the doom and retribution that will come upon :he English throne and the English people ! Soldiers?I look around upon your familiar Faces with a strange interest. Tomorrow morning we will go forth to battle?for need I tell you that your unworthy miuister will march with you, invoking God's aid in the fight?we will march forth to battle! Need I exhort you to fight the good tight, to fight for your homesteads, for your wives and children ? My friends?I might urge you to fight by the rr.qllinir memories of British wrongs.?Walton? n~-yr> I might tell you of your father, butchered in the silence of the night on the plains of Trenton?I might picture his gray hairs dabbled in blood j I might wring his death shriek in your ears. Shelmire?I might tell you of a butchered mother, and a sister outraged; the lowly farm house, the night assault, the roof in flames, the shouts of the troopers as they dispatched : heir victims, the cries for mercy and the pleadings of innocence for pity. I might paint this all again in * " 1 :* T the vivid colors ot ternuie reamy, u a muugui, your courage needed such wild excitement. Hut I know you are strong in the might of the Lord. You will march forth to battle on the morrow with light hearts and determined spirits; throughout the solemn duty?the duty of avenging the dead?may rest heavy 011 vi ur souls. And in the hour ofbattle, when all around you is darkness, lit by the lurid glare of the cannon, and the piercing musket flash, when the wounded strew the ground, and the'dead litter your path ?i 1.1:.?. .i... n u ' ?tiivii iciiiciiiu^i auiujcra, mat vjuu is ilii juu. The eternal God fights for you?he rides on the battle cloud, he sweeps onward with the march of the hurricane charge?God, the awful and infinite, fights for you; and you will triumph. "They tliat take the sword, shall perish by the sword." You have taken the sword, but not in the spirit of wrong or ravage. You have taken the sword for your homes, for your wives, for your children. You have taken the sword for truth and justice, and to you the promise is?be of good cheer, for your foes have taken the sword in defiance of all that men hold dear, in blasphemy of God?they shall perish by the sword. And now, brethren and soldiers. I bid you all farewell. Many of us may fall in the battle tomorrow. God rest the souls of the fallen ! Ma ny of us may live to tell the story of the fight tomorrow, and in the memory of all will rest and linger the quiet scene of this autumnal night. Solemn twilight advances over the valley ; the wood? on the opposite heights flinging their long shadows over the green meadow ; around us are the tents of the continental hosts, the suppressed bustle of the camp, the hurried tramp r>f the. snldinrs tn nnrl fro .nmnnrr fho fonts, the itillnoss and awe that marks the eve of battle. When we meet again, may the shadows of. twilight be dune over a peaceful land. God in heaven grant it. Let us pray. PRAYEIl OF THE REVOUUTION. Great Father, we bow bef >re thee; we invoke hy blessings we deprecate thy wrath ; we return thee thanks for the past, we ask thy aid for the 'uture. For we are in times of trouble, oh, Lord, ind sore beset by foes, merciless and unpitying. fhe sword gleams over our land, and the du$t >f the soil is dampened with the blood of our leighbors and friends. Oh ! God of mercy, we pray thee to bless the ! American arms. Make the man of our hearts ; trong in thy wisdom ; bless, we beseech thee, vith renewed life and strength, our hope, and thy nstrument, even George Washington ; shower hy counsels on the Honorable the Continental ' Congress; visit our host, comfort the soldier in 1 lis wounds and affliction, nerve him for the fight, 1 >repare him for the hour of death. ( And in the hour of defeat, oh, God of hosts, ' lo thou be our stay ; and in the hour of triumph I K? thou our ryiideLnrrcmin L) ' ? J y of galling wrongs be at our heart, knocking 1 or admittance, that they must fill us with the de- ' ire of revenge, yet let us, oh, spare the van|uishcd, though they never spared us, in the lour of butchery and bloodshed. And in the hour of death do thou guide us o the abode prepared for the blest; so shall we eturn thanks unto thee through Christ our ReWiner. God nrosner the cause.?-Amen. -### The Bride's Departure. The St Louis correspondent ofthe Cincinnati, Alias, relates the following incident, which occui ed in the boat in which ho embarked from Lousville: "After I had got on hoard, a few moments before we started, my attention was attracted :oward a group of friends with whom I became rery much interested. It was a family parting with a daughter and sist.er, who was a bride, and was leaving the home and friends of her childhood; to cast her lot with the one she loved, and seek another home in the far. far West. She appeared to be an only daughter?at least there was no sister there?and the parting of the mother and child was one ofthe most-affecting scenes I ever witnessed. They sat for an hour side by side in silence?the heart was too full to speak? waiting for the boat to start, and appearing anxious to remain together as long as possible. At length the last signal was given; they then arose, and with a look of grief, that I will never forget as long as I breathe, they regarded each other for ? ? * ?!*"? nnnlAciiu* tin nnnli I U lUUllltlll, ituu IIIVII unvniov . . V" > v?v other's arms, stood for a while trembling in parting anguish, as if in fear least to sunder that pmbrace, would tear every heart-string loose.? But at hist, summoning strength, they bade each other the sad farewell, in a tone and manner be yond the power of words to describe, such as told"all the depths of a mother's and a daughter's love, and such as subdued the whole company who saw it into sadness and tears. The fat he t then came and gave his parting blessing, and bid his sad farewell, and then took the mother, and they moved sadly away. When they had got to tiie cabin door, she turned to take that last, long, lingering look that the heart loves to and will take, when parting with some dearly loved object, though we feel that in doing so, the tide of grief and woe, and anguish, will pour with tenfold force around the soul. Their eyes met, and if they should never meet on earth again, that lingering look will be remembered till both hearts are cold and still in death, till they meet again in heaven. The brothers, two of them, remained on board to take their parting at the foot of the Falls. The eldest brother, almost a man, tried to part with manly dignity, but the last embrace was too much?he quivered for a while like an aspen leaf, and then bade tarewell in tears. The youngest, a small boy,gave loose to his anguish, and sobbed as if his very heart would burst?and after kissing her ngaiu and again, left her as though he had left the sweetest and dearest friend on earth, as though he had met with his first sad, great loss?and I doubt not that amid all the storms of life, that parting hour will be remembered forever. After they had got on shore, they stood on a point and waved their last adieu till they were lost sight of in the distance. Then, no doubt, a full sense of her loss coming home with till its powoi to the young girl's heart, and feeling that she was aloue in the world with the - - _~r'C man she loved, (who stood by her with his arol . v?| around her,) she hid her face in his bosom, and gave wily to all the .agony of her gricij Then I thouglit what will woman not do when she loves with all her heart? And what a treasure that man could call his own, when he held that young . ^ girl in his arms, and knew that she suffered all. . that. Anrrimli fur lmr l/%vo Mn" ?> t r . ? .v. xvi .viv ivi in in, auu uieu thought what a base heart his must be if he could v. abuse that love, and betray that trust and confidence. Yes, base he must be, if he does not lotfe her more than his own soul, and if he would not saerafice every selfish joy he has on earth to make A Good Reply.?John Bunyan, while in Bed- " ford jail, was called upon by a Quaker desiroua ' of making a convert of him. . Y- , 'Friend John,' said he, 'I am come to thee with a message from the Lord; and after having search-' . ed for thee, in half the prisons in England, I am glad I have found thee at last. V.S 'If the Lord has sent you,' returned Bunyan . 'you need not have taken so miwh noino An tPvm me out, for the Lord knows I have been here "Scm Snwix."?About a week ago, Mr. Isric Barber, cf Guildford, killed fifty-six black snakes in a ledge or pile of rooks near his house. They were from three to six and a half feet long.?~ y J j&m Under one of the stons which were upturned in search of the reptiles, were found fifty eggs of the same loathsome race, which were also demolish-* -'^8 ed. We begged hard to be excused from belie-" ving the whole of this story, but our informant wouldn't throw off a single snake/ Mr. Barber certainly deserves well of his country. * Bratleboro ( Ft.) Eagle. / " Diseases is Various."?The Boston Post man says he pullpd the following from Mrs. Part- ^ ington's carpet bag: " Diseases is very various," said Mrs. Partington, as she returned from a street door conver- ;:y =ation with Dr. Bolus. "The doctor tells me y that poor old Mrs. Haze has got two buckles on her lungs. It is dreadful to think of, I declare. ^ The disease is so various! One way we hear of 2&)w people's dying of hermitage of the lungs, another way of brown creatures ; here they tell us of the elementary canal being out of order, and * about there tonsors of the throat 5 here we Hear rf necrology in the head, there of an embargo} one side of us we hear of men being killed by- iV- clare I don't know how to subscribe for any disease now-a-days. New names and new nostrala... takes the place of the old, and I might as well throw my old herb bag away."?Fifteen min- " utes aftenvards Isaac had that herb bag for, M target, and broke three squares of glass in the cellar window in trying to hit it, before the old lady knew what he was about. She didn't mean ' *> r exactly what she said. 'Snipes if I were in your place Fd go and hang v " myself.' So would I, Snarl, if I were as big a ? fool as you are. "r ^ Husband Hunting.?"Heigh ho! I must havea - .,11 husband!" said Miss Crooks, "what shall I do! .' % Here I am hard upon my twenty-fifth year and they say I am homely as a hedge fence to boot !* - What shall I do? Woman's wit is Botto be j, sneezed at by those who do not take snuflj and being bent on getting a&husband, she would leave no stone unturned, ohe bought a ticket ' in the lottery. It drew a handsome prise. "My deaf Mi?s Crooks, is that you?" cried a lawyer of tho village one evening. "How' dare you go home alone this dark night ?" Oh! I am used to ' ? ; ? it," said she slily. The young man never let . her go home "lone afterwards. He married the gold, with Miss Crooks thrown in. A poem in a western paper begius, "Pve lived upon thy memory." That is about as bad as .Tiiri-v 'Rrrnnf'a hr?!>rdinnr hmioe feed where thev had nothing for dinner, and had it warmed over for supper, and what was left served up the next morning for breakfast , r "Bobby, what is the highest latitude known!" "The highest latitude known,is that which Bill Jones allows to his feelings when waltzing with our Kate." It is unnecessary to add, that Bobby was immediately marched off to bed, . ^ r-. . . An Tnclimun lioin-r nekod whv he Ipft his COtin * -J > ' -v try fur America, replied, "It wasu'e for want; I had plenty of that at home." "Wife," said a man, looking for a bootjack, "I have places where I keep my thiags, and you "ought to know it." "Yes," said she, "I ought to know where you keep your late hours." Do unto others as you would that others should do unto you, said a young buck, soliciting a young lady to kiss him. ^ " "Give us only one trial," the queck advertisers to invalids. "Walks into my parlor only once," "aid the spider to the fly. Obediah thinks the "tree of knowledge" was the birch tree, the twigs of which havodone more to make men acquainted with arithmetic than all the other members of the vegetable kingdom combined. A married lady, who was in the habit of spending mo*t ofher timein the society of her neighbors happened one dac to be takan suddenly ill, and I ?? k,,ohand n urpat haste for a ohvsician. I Sl'UV UC1 MI.OVC...V. ~ ^ _ 4 ^ 1 The husband ran a short distance, but soon | turned, exclain rip, ''My dear where shall you whcu I come backf" 0 B 0