University of South Carolina Libraries
/ / / aTai/topsy is held Body of Younr \Ventz Found to Be Perforated B) Pistol Ball # MANY THINK BE SffOT HIMSELF An Err,r.:v 22-Caiibre Pistol was FOv nd Near the Remains, While a Bali of ^ the Sstic Calibre Was Found in the Body. Bristol,Va., Special.?Tbc .shrunken tud decayed body of Edward L. Weutz was Jiu-raJly taken to pieces Tuesday afternoon by physicians and detectives, in the course of the coroner's inqufeot. which was begun at four o'clock in the dark cavern of Black Monte ain, and wjis closed without a verdict by the coming of night Ar 7.30 the jury was adjoruned until &.30 Wednesday morning, when the session will likely be held at Stoncga, and many witnesses were heard. The startling feature of the inquest was the discover}- of a 32calibre pistol ball in the body, which might have been discharged from an empty pistol of the same calibre found eighteen feet from the remains. The ball had passed through the fifth rib. entering in front, had penetrated * the heart, a back rib and lodged in the mumscles of the back,one and a half inches from the spine. Several bol<?s were found in the clothing other than where the bullets entered, but beneath them the body was found intact. The right hand was found missing and was probably borne awar by wild beasts. A white pearl button, which could not have belonged to the murdered man. was found near. There is little doubt but that the hall penetrated the heart, as the physicians found evidence of hemorrhage in that portion of the body, and an .mmeuse amount of blood congested back of the lungs. Detectives on the jcene niado careful examination of ?e pistol, finding it to be a Smith k Wesson, No. 85-0-50. Two cartridges were on either side of the hammer, but the chamber under the hammer contained an empty shell. well as the two lower chambers. A loaded cartridge of 32 calibre was found several feet from the body. Many articles in his pockets wer? %>und intact. Honors Simonton. Ki hinond Va.. Special?Chief Justice Fuller of the United States Supreme Court, sat with the other judges in the ?pc ial session of the Federal Circuit Court of Appeals held here Tuesday in memory of the late Judge Simonton. The judges, other than the Chief Justice. sitting during the memorial meeting were Judge Purnell, of North Carolina: Judge Brawley. of South Carolina: Judge Morris of Maryland: Judge GofT, of Vv'est Virginia, and Judge Waddill, of the District Court of Virginia. Resolutions from the various districts in this circuit and from various bar associations, city and State, were presented, with appropriate remarks. the chief justice being among those who paid tribute to the departed Jurist. The flag on the Federal building was at half mast during the memorial exercises. T Arrested for Fraud. Berlin, Special- Die Post publishes a news agency dispatch from St. Petersburg which says that General Schwedoff lost over half million dollars through speculation In stocks anil took the money from the Red Cross trpasi>rv Tn order to avoid a scandal the Empress Dowager, who Is the protertress of the Red Cross Society, and \ friend of Gen. SohwodefT. reimbursed the sums. The dispatch further says the Prince Garlltzin and Count Lansky also have been guilty of irregularities in connection with the Red Cross mantromant May Give City to Chinese. New Cbwang. By Cable.?Of the five Russian regiments which were in garrison here, four have left and the other received orders to go today, but this order was cancelled an hour later. The Russians are strongly entrenched at An Ping. where the guns from the New Chwang fort3 have been sent. Colonel Muenthe, the military adviser of Vicetov Yuan Shi Kai. commander-in-chief ef the Chinese forces, arrived here this afternoon. It is believed he came to New Cbwang to confer with the Russians regarding the proposal to turn New Chwang over to the Chinese. The Russians are known to be communicating with the Chinese brigands and \> be stirring up a state of terror among the natives. Removed From Office Macon Ga.. Special?United States Marsha) J. M. Barnes was removed from office on telegraphic instructions from President Roosevelt. The cause or the removal is thought to be a tilffieulty which took place a short time aso at vaiaosia. ua.. ueiweeu Judge Emory Spoor aud the marshal. Judge Specr left here for Washington last Sunday. ^ Henry M. Stanley Dead. London. Special.?Sir Henry M. Stanley. the African explorer, whose death was announced in these dispatches early Tuesday passed away peacefully shortly after 6 o'clock. He was quite consc ious to the last and able to recognize his wife. Before he died Sir Henry expressed a wish to he buried at his country seat. Furze Hill. Pirbright, Surrey. The question, however, is being discussed of burying him beside Livingstons, in Westminster Abbey. NEWS THROUGHOUT THE COUNTRY Paragraphs of Minor Importance Gathered From Many Sources. Through the South. 1 Afirr vaiioas attempts lo hold together the Italian settlement at New Palermo. ;>(J mile* north of Mobile. Ala., it has gone to pie res. The leader, Salvador? Comglio Pompatielll. is said to have left. The colonists are from New \ork and other Eastern cities and are ir." peed of assltr.ncc. The battleship Missouri steamed into Hampton Roads Tuesday afternoon at | 2 o'clock anu nn hour later dropped anchor there. J-ast night Captain ! Cowles came ashore and met his wife < and child. The Missouri will be docked i at the shipyards to receive whatever , repairs are needed. It is reported from Mexico City that last week over a million silver dollars 5 were shipped from her? to Japan via < San Francisco. Japan paying a small ? premium over the London quotation for { dollars. i Wshington Happenings. Secretary of the Navy Moody arrived 1 at Havana. 1 Formal steps are being taken at c Washington to recognize the Morales ( Government in Santo Domingo. j The trial of Jamee N. Tyner and * Harrison J. Barrett in connection with i the postoffiee investigation was rc- ? sumed. The Court of Claims upheld the collection of duty on goods sent from this country to the Philippines during the military administration, thus saving the Government about $7,000,000. Secretary Shaw held a conference with J. P. Morgan's partners to arrange the final details of the Panama canal payments. In the North. A tornado swept portions of Iowa. Kansas and Missouri. Plans were-discussed at a meeting in New York for establishing a great Jewish university. The Republican National Committee will decide contests among delegates at Chicago on June 15. Mrs. Mary A. Powell, at Dover, told in court of the killing of Estelle AlbiD and declared it was in self-defense. An immense, missionary exhibit was opened at the Methodist General Conference at Los Angeles. Three whites were hanged at Winchester. Tenn.. and one white and one negro at Pittsburg, all for murder. James F. Hale and T. H. Leary. brokers, were expelled from the New York Consolidated Exchange. Directors or tne ,\ew Yors uentrai Railroad complete<l arrangements for iBSuing $30,0000,COO four per cent, bonds. * Queen Lilioukalani, deposed ruler of | Hawaii, and her son. Prince Cupid, ar- , rived in St. Loui6 to see the World's Fair. ( Circuit Attorney J. W. Folk carried ' It) out of the 11 counties in Missouri < that held primaries Saturday, and his nomination for Governor by the Democrats seems practically certain. Trustees of the McKinley Memorial i Association fund decided upon a limited paid competition for an architect at a meeting in New York and passed resolutions eulogizing the late Senator < Hanna. " i T? T If Dk.'1A/lAlnkU in J Airr. .j. m. mug, ui i uuaucijuuu, introduced a resolution attacking the 1 Catholic position as to public schools in the Northern Methodist Episcopal General Conference in Los Angeles, but after Chief Justice I-ore, of Delaware, 1 had defended the Catholics, the resolution was referred to a committee. Foreign Affairs. The birth of an heir to the Italian throne is expected in September. The Japanese were busy landing troops to the northeast of Port Arthur and on the west side of the Lono Tung peninsula. There were a number of unconfirmed rumors of a great land battle in Manchuria, in which the Japanese were deleated, and of a sea fight off the Korean coast. Miscellaneous Doings. It is denied that there is danger of a rising in Haiti. American financiers agreed to tak? one-half the Japanese loan of $50,000,000, the British taking the other half. 1 Maurus Jokai. the Hungarian novelist, died at Budapest. "?ncral Vaolifslinul'i- rcnnrtpd offi clally that his losses ;n the battle of Sunday last were over 2,000. The Venezuelan Congress conferred dictatorial powers on* President Castro lor one year. The Davis bakery, at Norfolk, was operated under guard. The Railway Auditors' Association is in session at Old Point. Peru agreed to evacuate the disputed territory in Acre pending a settlement with Brazil. The late Solomon Loch left about $100,001? to charitable and educational institutions, mostly Hebrew. It was stated railway earnings had decreased *10.0f?0.000 since April 1. as compared with last year, and the roads are cutting expenses. A motorman was killed aud five passengers hurt in a rear-end collision on the Third avenue "L." ip New York. There is a movement in Manchester in favor of annexation to Richmond. The body of John Proudfit. son of the late Rev. Alexander Produfit. of ' Baltimore, and whe was drowned November 3 last, was found floating in the river near New Castle, Del. The annual meeting ->f the Meat Cutters and Butchers' Union of the United States and Canada began in Cincinnati. James Shay, engineer Cf Blue Ridge Colliery, near Peekville. Pa., standing in a biasing engine house, hoisted 13 miners to safety, himself being badly burned. SOUTH CAROLINA CROP BULLETIN Conditions Reported by Department for Past Week. The week euding 8 a. m.. May 9th, had a mean temperature of G9 degrees which is slightly less than one degree below normal, due to cool weather during the first, and warm during the lasj of j be week. There w?.:j more than the normal amount of cloudiness, and the deficiency in sunshine was harmful to rice and cotton. The rainfall was below normal, and I panged from a mere trjco to over an inch aiid fl half. Tho western, and the second tier, from the coast, of eastern counties had "the largest amounts, the north central ones the smallest. The showers were local in character.. and argely insufficient, but it is safe to as:urue that in onc-thir.-l of the State the Irought has been relieved, or nearly ;o. although more rain would prove jeneficial in all sections. Hail occur ed at a few places, doing no damage. The week was favorable for the rapid regress of farm work, and staple crops lave been planted with the exception )f bottom lands and late rice. As a rule ultivation has kept pace with the growth of crops and fields are free 'rom grass and weeds. Cut worms, bud .vonns and birds continue to damage stands of corn oti bottoms, and Col>rado beetles have appeared on white potatoes. There Is a general improvement potcd in corn where showers occurred, n stands, growth and color, but where he rainfall was light, or where none 'ell. it remains small and yellow. Most pf it has received its first cultivation md some its second. Considerable replanting is being done. Cotton is coming up better, and itands have improved materially durng the last week, and generally the plants have a healthier look, but on ed, and clay lands germination and growth continue slow and unsatisfac:ory. Early cotton Is being replanted n many sections, while later plantngs are coming up to good stands on sandy lands. Some have received its irst cultivation and has been chopped n the southern counties. Sea Island %otton was greatly benefited by the showers and humid, warmer weather. Tobacco transplanting is finished, but rrowth has been slow. The acreage is jnly from one-fifth to one-half that of last year. Oats are poor, and are heading low in all sections, except on moist bottoms. Wheat is more promising, ind although low. is heading well, and I is in bloom. White potatoes hre poor ! in the coast districts, and promising in i the interior. Shipments have begun! from the former sections, also of beans, rruek Is late, except strawberries that ire hearing exceptionally well. Excesive dropping of peaches is noted in j all save the "ridge" sections, where from three-fourths to a full crop is in- | 3icated. Early peaches and plums are j ripening along the coast. Apples and i -1 ?'In tlio ll'OOt orn i i.'uriiurg aitr iu iuv I counties. Sweet potato.sprouts are i srarre. Minor crops are 1? normal con-; ilition. J. V.'. Bauer. Section Director. { THE FUN-FLOWER CARNIVAL. Columbia People and Visitors Will ; Have a Great Entertainment. j Columbia is preparing for a spring carnival which will exceed in attract-1 iveness anything before attempted at at this time of year by the capital city. The Chamber of Commerce is: back of the undertaking, and has re-1 ceived assurance from a number of towns in the State which indicate that the attendance will be as large as the crowds which gather in Columbia fair week. The day of attractions on the streets will be one of the best carnival shows that could be obtained, and the great night attractions will be the fireworks?the fall of Pompeii ?by the Pain Company, presenting a ! ballet of COO people. But the great, feature of the week will be the iloral parade Thursday, afternoon, May 20.?There will be two ' miles of vehicles gaily decorated, the procession being led by the king and ijueen in State. The coronation will , take place at the State rapito? just before tho gorgeous caravan proceeds up Main street. This feature alone will ottro/.| mnnv tvn/tnln tr\ fnliimhlfl for I he most beautiful feature of a reunion week last year was the floral parade. Thursday night there will 1>e a grand ball, which will equal in pomp ar' c ircumstance the State balls of fair weeks. Indeed it is proposed to make the Fun-Flower carnival an annual fete, and tho ball will be as much of a feature as the State ball is fair week. The chamber of commerce has secured reduced rates on railroads, and has procured two of the best hands in the Slate. There will be a grand tournament Wednesday, and knights from all over the State will participate for the prizes in gold, aggregating $150. and for the silver cup for horsemanship. Another feature which will draw many people to Columbia is the gathering of the Elks. There will be a meeting or an tne rouges m m? State, and a numbw of other secret orders are preparing for a like celebration. Columbia is prettiest just at this time of year, and the people of that city think that a spring floral carnival Is just the proper thing 10 give pleas-, ure to the people of the State ai a big spring jollification. To Build Oil Mill. Walhalla, Special.?Capt. W. A. Strothor, of Walhalla. and Mr. James Phinney, of West Union, arc preparing to build a 20-ton cotton seed oil mill at West Union. They have purchased all their machinery and expect to be ready for this year's seed crop. Mr. Robert H. Jackson, of Anderson, is here making the brick for the oil mill. Strother & Phinney's store room at West Union "i* rthcr enterprises. ' ?1 ' I PALME TTO POINTS | GIViEN IN BRIEf ' -A ' State's New Enterprises. I The Chattanooga Ul "Pr Revelopmec I i ompanv of Georgia file* 1 PaPers of dc I rustication .with the sOf!\ ^ry,?^18^t' 'tiiC company has a caplU 1 of'10,0U and the principal nlace of l Citvton. in RaW county.^\Tolln ii'gai representative in "*>mn tx ^ j is Jos. F. Neville of West Ufllo* \t Oconee Ao.mty, just across the .Scliue. The Anderson Telephone company which manufactures instruments, has increased its capital stock. This company was organized in 1895 with $1,000 capital. In 1900 an increase was made to $10,000 and the present increase is to $30,000. The directors are: G. W. Kvans, W. R. Osborne. E. S. Moorer and R. L. Hill. The Builders' Supply company of Oaffney received its charter. The capital stock is $5,000 and the officers are Kenneth Baker, president; L. Baker, vice president and general manager, and Walter Baker, secretary and treasurer. The Reliable Jobbing company of Charleston, mercantile in character, is capitalized at $12,000. It received a commission yesterday. The corporators are: M. J. Hornik and B. C. Bellinger cf Charleston and S. Harris of MayesTille. Another Charleston concern is the Ashley Improvement company of Charleston. The capital is $3,500 and the corporators are W. H. Richardson of Summerville and B. C. Bellinger and M. J. Hornik of Charleston. The Carolina Construction company is a a Anderson concern. It received a chatter yesterday. The capital is $60,000 and the officers are: Geo. L. Cough1 in. president; R. L. Ligon, vice presiT dent, and J. A. Brock, secretary and treasurer. This company will build an interurban' electric railway, which meais to the Piedmont an era of increasing prosperity. The road will run from Greenville to Anderson and on its line will be Piedmont, Pelier and many other of the manufacturing towns of the northwestern part of the State. Grand Lodge Elects Officers. Anderson. Special.?The Grand ]x)dgc of Odd Fellows last week elected officers to serve for the ensuing year. These officers were installed after which the grand lodge adjourned sine die. The body meets in Greenwood next year. The following are the new officers: Grand master, J. J. McSwain, Greenville: deputy grand master, L. M. C. Oliveros, Aiken; grand warden, C. R. D. Burns. Watlhalla; grand secretary. S. F. Killingsworth, Abbeville; grand treasurer, H. fendel. Greenville; grand chaplain, H. A. Hemrick. Xew Brookland. The retiring grand master. Cole L. Blease was elected representative to the sovereign lodge which meets in San Francisco in September. Homicide Near Seneca. Seneca. Special.?Walter Mills was shot and killed near Seneca Thursday. The coroner h*ld an inquest and the vel'dict of the jury was that Mills came to his death by a gun-shot wound at the hands of Earle Rochester. Mills was shot in the head with a shot-gun mini Vn t chnt There were ivau\;a mtu v -- ? were 60 shot in his head, face and neck, crushing his skull and penetrating his brain. AM the parties were young white men and farmers. The trouble is supposed to have arisen over a cow. Mills claiming that Rochester had shot his cow. Rochester Immediately went to Walhalla after the shooting and gave himself up to ^Sheriff Moss and is in jail. Both are 'married antl have families. Mills leaves a wife and two small children. Boy Drowned Near Columbia. Columbia. Special. ? Raymond Brown, ihe 14-year-old son of Mr. D. F. Brown, the keeper of Elrawood Cemetery, was drowned Thursday afternoon in the canal near the C. N. & L. railroad trestle. At the place where the unfortunate lad was last seen the water runs swiftly, and though there were earnest efforts made to recover the body it is probable that it has floated far down towards the Gervais street end of the power stieam. Out on Bond. Wash Kinsler. of Columbia, charged with attempting to pass counterfeit money, is out on bond. The United States commissioner, on the recommendation of the district attorney, reduced the amount of his bond from $1,000 to $500. This Kinsler was able tc get. Trolley Line to be Built. Union, Special.?It nas ben semiofficially announced that W. J. Oliver has singned the contract for constructing the electric line from Neals Shoals on the Seaboard, to this place, and that between this and June 1 work will begin on it. Santuc, which has a knitting mill, is trying to get the line to com? by that town and two of its best busii ess men are securing rightof-ways through the county. The town also offers other liberal inducements. The promoters of this line say it will run both electric and steam cars, the latter probably for freight, it being a broad gauge road. Constable Released on Bail. Constable M. S. Davenport, who shot and kil ed Will Williams, a negro, at Greenwood on Saturday night, was granted bail Thursday in the sum of $2,000. Mr. F. Barron Grier of Greenwood, representing the constable, and Assistant Attorney C&TTeral W. H. Townscnd. representing the State, appeared before Chhjf Justice Pope at chambers. Davenport will be tried for murder at the August term of court for Greenwood county. PLACE WILL BE HARD TO FILL 1 Although the Trustees of South Caro* College Have 39 Applications for the Chair of History. Columbia Special.?The trasteees of the South Carolina college met SaturL| day and?as one of the members ex> pressed it?had a "talk-feast." The s* ob;ect. of the meeting was to discuss fillinz the chair of history made va 13 ~ " e cant by the death of the lamented a Prof. R. Means Davis. This is a much n hauler undertaking than the unine formed public might suspect. The . ^a ?her of history and political econoJ ^ ">ust have many qualifications. embers of the board will re, who knows general hisqu.'ro a man ? , .. . , . . ory of the State; who tory and the his.. . . . . / , , ory but has an innot r nly knows hfsv acquaintance timate and personal . . . ... .. , . . Nstory and with the characters in u . CDtirsc* who not only can tell of these fjve ter3 in a pleasant style of narra. , but can impart that knowledge anu can get the classes to do all the work required of them in a manner which shows that they are interested In the course. It will take no small man to fill the place left by Means Davis. There are 29 applications before the board yesterday and other names were suggested informally, all of which shows that there is good material from which to select. The members of the board present were: Gov. Heyward. Supt. Martin, Mr. August Kohn, Mr. Jno. J. McMahan, Mr. Robert MacFarlane of Darlington; Mr. C. E. Spencer of Yorkville. Senator G. W. Brown of Darlington, Dr. W. T. C. Bates of St. Matthews, Mr. R. P. Hamer, Jr., of Marion, and Mr. James Q. Davis of Winnsboro. There, can be no election of a professor except at a stated meeting of the board .and the members had met just to talk over the situation and to eliminate from the list those names .which could not be considered. While some of the members of the board have about decided upon a plan of action, there was no formal motion made and no ballots taken. It Is probame that there will be other changes at the college as there are rumors that big universities are trying to get some of the teachers. The board also discussed the matter of electing an assistant to the head of the department of English. There were 14 applicants for this position which was created by the legislature at its last session. The board did not |ake any definite action on this matter. As stated, this was not a meeting to elect, but just to discuss the situation in general terms and to talk of the outlook of the college. The mem! hers of the board are very much gratified at the prospects, and hope to have ! the vacancies filled at the regular | meeting on the 7th of June. | Thirty-Nine Physicians Licensed. j All but three c/ the candidates who stood the examifltions for licenses to ; practice medicine in this State were successful. The examinations, it is said, were more difficult this year than in several years and the percentage of j successful men is larger also. The ! names of the new doctors are as folj lows: Ej C. L. Adams, Columbia; Wm. i J. Beasley, Ashland; M. P. Burnham, I GafTney; F. L. Carpenter, Latta: J. T. J Carter, Mars Bluff: F. L. Clark, Florj ence; H. C. Dozier. Columbia; A. G. ! Eaddy, Timmonsville; W. K. Fish j burne. Walterboro; F. B. Johrron, Co! lumbia; T. C. Johnson, Mars Bluff; T. G. Kershaw, Youngs Island; J. H. I Miller. I.aurens; C. H. Pate( Stokes ! Bridge; J. L. Powe, Dovesvllle; T. W. Reynolds. Charleston; L. B. Salters. Salters; D. H. Smith. Rook Hill; L. J. Smith. Ridge Springs; B. B. Steedley, Gaffney; L. C. Stnkes, Manning; H. R. Tison. Augus'ta, Ga.; G. A. Taylor, McCprmick; A. P. Traywiok. Lake J City: W. P. Turner. Jr.. Carroll; G. H. Walters. Charleston; S. P. Wells. Wells; T. S. Westmoreland. Woodruff; W. B. Young. Charleston, and J. G. Edwards, Abbeville. Convention Closes. Buffalo, Special.?Two mass meetings. one for women and the other for men, services in several churches and an evening meeting at City Convention Hall Sunday ended the thirty-fifth international convention of the Y. M. C. A. of North America. At the meeting for women Miss Helen M. Gould read the lesson of the day. - U-I-J M*?t!nn SIOCKriUIUCrs viu Anderson, Special.?The stockhold- 1 ers of the Orr Cotton Mills held their annual meeting Friday and re-elected all the old directors and officers. The report of the president, Col. Jas. L. On-. showed that the affairs of the mill are in splendid shape and the company is making money. The mills are doing good work and turning out a beautiful product. The help is firstclass in quality and sufficient in quantity. The officers and directors are as follows: Officers?Col. Jas. L. Orr, president; and treasurer; Dr. S. M. Orr. vice president; Calhoun Harris, secretary and assistant treasurer. Five Men Eaten by Cannibals. Vancouver, Special.?Mail advices by the Australian steamer are that five men were killed and eaten by cannibals of the Admiralty Island3. South Sea. The British warship Condor was sent to the scene and set fire to the village where the cannibals lived. The Condors' officers threatened to annihilate the village if it aid not surrender the cannibals. This was done and the cannibals were shot. . . [OURBudget "? v#- OF HuMOK. 1J The Wife .No One Went*. T fl There was a young lady at Bin&liam^ -:" E i Who knew many songs, and could sing '?awH J'>nt she couldn't mend hose, I ' And she wouldn't wash clothes, ^ I Or iielj) her old mother to wring 'cm. \ fl 1Vl?e Man. '1 Guest iin cheap restaurant)?"Hess. I waiter! This food is vile, and I don't jj ( propose to pay for it Where's the .II proprietor?" 'titilfl Waiter?"He's gone lioine to li^uch, A sir."--Philadelphia ledger. fl . > ^ An ?*eeptlonal Cu?, "* "' v *. Smith?"You wouldn't take Bocksfey^lj iui a stwi-iuuue man, wouia yonr' Rogers?"I should say not! WhjrfM be usos go?d English and doesn't 1 weigh more than one hundred and jl oi-'iiry pounds .'"?Town Topics. ^ I Taking Chances. I "That land." said the city nephew, >15 "Is vaIuo(I at $800 a front foot." ( , ' iSS "Thau/'erationJ" exclaimed the old j j farmer, basely moving back on to tlit^H sidewalk. "Ail' I rtood on it mosi*flT> | minutes! r>o you vockon they'll charg^^H me rent?"?Chicago I*Ost. Lucky. "I dislike to keep you In after school," said the teacher. "Aren't ydc sorry you were naughty and have "No'm," replied Johnny. 'Pie-face' Jj is waitin' out there to lick me.**?IiK ;j dianapolis Sun. "vfln ' 7' Torn About. Aunt Mary?"Nora, you'ra a cruel* child. Let thaf cat go at once." Nora (banging the cat)?"But ahe'n ^ been naughty. Annty, an' I'm punishin*' *31 her. I told her it was for her own J good, an' it hurt me more'n it hurt ? her."?Brooklyn Life. Judge'* Regret. "Yonr Honor," said the young law- ' yer, "I demand Justice for my client.'* 1 KI'd be only too glad to accdmmo* S date you," answered the Judge, "but as the law won't allow me to give him J more tha^ six months I am practically helpless."?Chicago News. ? .di Proper Reverence. 'Jj Mamma?"Now, Willie Jones likes tn '] go to Sunday school, I'm sure." : A Tommy?"I guess he does, the way he talks about it." Mamma?"Why, what does he say?* 2 Tommy?"He calls it '9abbath? ,^| school.' "?Philadelphia Press. . < She Knew Hlm. "You say you don't know Mr. Bock* very well." "Only slightly. Let me see. I be- . lieve we were engaged once."?New York American. Man'* Modesty. "Do you believe," she asked, "that * genius can possibly be a good hnaband?" "Well," he modestly replied. "I would prefer not to answer that question. But ray wife ought to be abl* to tell you."?Chicago Record-Herald The Next Beet Thine. "I thought she was determined never., to marry any man whose ancestor* had not come over in the Mayflower." "Yes, but she changed her mind when she met this fellow whose ancestors went to California in a prairie schooner."?Chicago Record-Herald. ! ' ' ^ . Parental Wisdom. "I shouldn't think the Smiths would name their now baby 'John'?there are so many John Smiths." "lliai S a goou ining one way. 11. his nanio ever gets in the 'police reports' folks won't know whether ifs he or some other John Smith."-* Puck. The Girl* That Buy 'Em. American Girl?"We haven't been over long, you know. I suppose your people always lived here?" Augustus?"We came to England with the Xormans. don't you know." American Girl?"Oh, indeed, the Normans! I'm afraid I don't know them." -Tit-Eits. U?e of Syuonymi. A teacher in one of the Brooklyn schools, wishing to enlarge the vocabulary of her class in English composition, asked each member of it to write a sentence containing synonyms of the word "ran" and "tale." One little fellow having laboriously looked up the definitions in his small dictionary, submitted the following highly descriptive result: "A .dog trickled down the street with a tin can tied to his narrative."? Brooklyn Eagle* , ~~ t ....