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Th* Man In The Moon. f James Whitcomb Riley.] 0 the Man in the Moon has a crick in his back; Wheel Whim! Ain’t yon sorry for himl And a mole on his nose that is purple and black; His eve* are so weak that they water and run If he dares to look at or even dream of the sun,— Bo he just dreams of stars as the doc tors advise— My! Eyes! But isn’t he wise— To just dream of stars as the doctors advise? And the Man in the Moon has a boil on his ear— Wheel Wiling! What a singular thing!, I know; but these facts are authentic my dear, There's a boil on his ear, and a corn on his chin— He calls it a dimple,—but dimples stick in— Yet it might be a dimple turned over, you know; Whang! Ho! Why, certainly so?— It might be a dimple turned over, you know! And the Man in the Moon has a rheu matic knee— Gee! Whiix! What a pity that is! And his toes have worked round to where his heels ought to be; So whenever he wants to go North he goes South, And comes back with porridge crumbs all round his mouth, And he brushes them off with a Jap anese fan, Whing! Whann! What a marvelous man! What a very remarkable marvelous man! "My Grandfather's Clock.” (Jerome K. Jerome.) Well, I was going to tell you about our clock. It was my wife’s idea, getting it, in the first instance. We had been to dinner at the Bug gies’, and the Buggies had just bought a clock—“picked it up in Essex,” was the way he de scribed the" transaction. Bug gies is always going about “picking up” things. He will stand before an old carvea bed stead, weighing about three tons, and say: “Yes—pretty little thing! I picked it up in Holland;” as though he had found it by the road-side, and slipped it into his umbrella when nobody was looking. Buggies was rather full of this clock. It was of the good old- fashioned “grandfather” type. It stood eight feet high, in a carved oak case, and had a deep, sonorous, solemn tick, that made pleasant accompaniment to the after-dinner chat, and seemed to fill the room with an air of homely dignity. We discussed the clock, and Buggies said how he loved the sound of its slow, grave tick; and how, when all the house was still, and he and it were sitting up alone together, it seemed like some wise old friend talking to him, and telling him about the old days and the old ways of thought, and the old life and the old people. The clock impressed my wife very much. She was very thoughtful all thp way home, and, as we went upstairs to our flat, she said; “Why could not we have a clock like that?” She said it would seem' like having some one in the house to take care of us all—she should fancy it was looking af ter baby! I have a man in Northamp- topshire from whom 1 buy old furniture now and then, and to him I applied. He answered by return to say that he had got exactly the very thing I want ed. (He always has. I am very lucky in this respect.) It was the auainte. t and most old-fash ioned clock he had come across for a long while, and he inclos ed photograph and full particu lars; should he send it up? From the photograph and the particulars, it seemed, as he said, the very thing, and I told him: “Yes; send it up at once,” Three day# afterward there came a knock at the door—there had been other knocks at the door before this, of course; but l am dealing merely with the History of the clock. The girl said a couple of men werq out side, and wanted to see me, and I went to them. I found they were Bickford’s carriers, and, glancing at the way-bill, I saw that it was my clock that they had brought, and I said, airily; “Oh, yes! it’s quite right; bring it up.” They said they were very sor ry, but that was just the diffi culty. They could not get it up. I went down with them, and, wedged securely across the se cona landing of the staircase, I found a box which I should have judged to be the original case in which came over. They said that was my clock. I brought down a chopper and a crowbar, and we sent out and collected in two extra hired ruf fians, and the five of us worked av. ay for half an hour and got the clock out; after which the traffic up and down the stair case was resumed, much to the satisfaction of the other ten ants. We then got the clock up stairs and put it together, and I fixed it in the corner of the dining-room. At first it exhibited a strong desire to topple over and fall on people, but by the liberal use of nails and screws and bits of fire wood, I made life in the same room with it possible, and then, being exhausted, I had my wounds dressed, and went to bed. In the middle of the light, my wife woke me up in a great state of alarm, to say that the clo^k had just struck thirteen, and who did I think was going to die? I said I did not know, but hoped it might be the next-door dog. My wife said she had a pres entiment it meant baby. There was no comforting her; she cried herself to sleep again. During the course of the morning, I succeeded in per suading her that she must nave made a mistake, and she con sented to smile once more. In the afternoon the clock struck thirteen again. This renewed all her fears. She was convinced now that both baby and I were doomed, and that she would be left a childless widow. I tried to treat the matter as a joke, and this only made her more wretched. She said that she could 860 I really felt as she did, and was only pretending to be light hearted for her sake, and she said she would try and bear it bravely. The person she chiefly blamed was Buggies. In the night, the clock gave us another warning, and my wife accepted it for her aunt Maria, and seemed resigned. She wished, however, that I had .lever had the clock, and won dered when, if ever, I should get cured of my absurd ‘craze for filling the house with tom foolery. The next day the clock struck thirteen four times, and this cheered her up. She said that if we were all going to die, it did not so much matter. Most likely there was a fever or a plague coming, and we should all be taken together. She was quite light-hearted over it! After that, the clock went on and killed every friend and rela tion we had, and then it started on the neighbors. It struck thirteen all day long for months, until we were sick of slaughter, and there could not have been a human being lefi alive for miles around. Then it turned over a new leaf, and gave up murdering folks, and took to striking mere harmless thirty-nines and forty- ones. Its favorite number now is thirty-two but once a day it strikes forty-nine. It never strikes more than forty-nine. I don’t know why—I have never been able to understand why— but it doesn’t. It does not strike at regular intervals, but when it feels it wants to and would be be ter for it. Sometimes it strikes three or four times within the same hour, and at other times it will go for half a day with out striking at all. He is an odd old fellow! I have thought now and then of having him “seen to,” and made to keep regular hours and be respectable; but, somehow ; I seem to hqve grown to love him as he is, with his daring mock ery of T4iae. He certainly has not much re spect for it. He seems to go out of his way almost to openly insult it. He calls half past two thirty-eight o’clock, and in twenty minutes from then he says it is one! Is it that he really has grown to feel contempt for his master, and wishes to show it? They say no man is a hero to his va let; may it be that even stony- face Time himself isbptgshort- lived puny mortal—a little greater than some others, that is ail—to the dim eyes of this old servant of his? Has hs, ticking, all these years, come at last to see into the littleness of that Time that looms so great to our awed human eyes? Is he saying, as he grimly laughs, and strikes fives and forties: VBah! I know you, Time, god like and dread though you seem. What are you but a phantom—a dream—like the rest of us here? Ay, less, for you will pass away and be no more. Fear him not, immortal men. Time Is but the shadow of the world upon the back- ground of Eternity!” A person is prematurely old when baldness occurs before th« fortv fifth year. Use Hall't Hrui Itonewbr to keep the scalp healthy and prevent baldness. A Fine Old Men. (Mark Twain.) John Wagner, the oldest man in Buffalo—one hundred and four years old—recently walked a mile and half in two weeks. He is as cheerful and bright as any of these older men that charge around so persistently and tiresomely in the newspa pers, and in every way as re markable. Last November he walked five blocks in a rain storm, without any shelter but an um brella, and cast his vote for Grant, remarking that he had voted for forty seven presidents —which was a lie. His “second crop” of rich brown hair arrived from New York yesterday; and he has a new set of teeth coming—from Philadelphia. He is to be married next week to a girl one hundred and two years old, who still takes in washing. .They have been engaged eigh ty years, but their parents per sistently refused their consent until three days ago. John Wagner is two years older than the Rhode Island veteran, and yet has never tast ed a drop of liquor in his life— unless—unless you count whis key. “Canst thou minister to a mind diseased diseased?” asks Macbeth. Certainly, my lord; the condition of the mind de pends largely, if not solely, on the condition of the stomach, liver, and bowels, for all of which complaints Ayer’s Pills are “the sovereignest thing on earth.” So Simple. Nine timet out of ten whenwe are of sorts our trou bles can be removed by that re liable old medicine, Brown’s Iron Bitters, which for more than 20 years has been curing many people of Dyspepsia, Biliousness, Ma laria, Impure Blood, Neural gia, Headache, Liver and Kid ney doubles. It’s the peculiar combination of iron, the great strength-giver, with' selected vegetable remedies of true value that makes Brown’s Iron Bitters so good for strengthen ing and purifying the system. It is specially good for women and children—it makes them strong and rosy. •■wwa'i Iron Bitten to pleasant to take, end It will not etftln the teeth nor caiun constipation. See the croamed rad limed am tea wrappar. Our book, "How to Lie* a Hundred Vann," Ulto nil a boat it; free for Be. stamp. 60 Bwwtt Chkmical Co. Su.timou.Mb M 1U, |L25. -AND- CiM Wort ol olT" undertaken, an d satisfaction guaranteed JNHH SISKROH'S SHOPS: and Undertakers’ band at low prices. supplies always on T. C. Jeffords, Jr. SOUTH CAROLINA COLLEGE. S ession begins sept. 24th. Ten Regular Courses. w(th Dtp: lomaa. Special Cotp-sea, with Uertlfl- cates. Retard, fa a month. Total necessary expenses for the year (ex clusive of traveling, clothing and books), from $113 to $1M). Women admitted to all Classes. For farther information, address the President, JAMES WOODROW, Aug. 1 - Columbia, S. C. iim M. NORUT, Alt. DARLINGTON, S. C. — :o: — Mrs. Norment begs hereby to express her sincere thanks and gratitude for the very generous, and highly appreciated, ernnort accorded to her in the contin- daS-e the Fire Insurance department of ’t"- 1 !e husband,s lusiness:—With much saasfaction, she calls attention to the prompt and liberal settlements, which hare been experienced by those having sustained loss under policies Is sued through her Agency;—and as she represents only first-class, high grade Companies she feels assured of a con tinuance of these valuable business ad vantages, as connected with transactions through her Agency; and therefore takes great pleasure in requesting continuance of like generous support. f fee Mm. The first of American Newspapers, CHARLES A. DANA, Editor. The American Constitntlon, the American Idea, the American Spirit, These first, last, and all the time, forever. Daily, by mall, • • - - t« a year Dally and Sunday, by mall, fiS a year The Weekly, $1 a year The Sunday Sun is the greatest Sunday Newspaper in the world. Price 5c. a copy. By mail, $2 a year Addrees THE SUN, New York- Position Wanted. K Y a young man, in a shoe, cloth ing, hardware, music, or de partment store; has had ten years’ experience in one of the best depart ment stores in Darlington; is a ‘‘hus tler” for trade; is steady, sober and reliable; moderate salary expected. Addrees, “X," care The Dahlino- tox News. Aug. 1—2t. Town Ordinance. Council Chamber, ) Darlington, 8. C., April 26, 1885. J B E it ordered and ordained: That, for the purpose of electing five members of a Board of Health, as re quired by an Act of the Legislature ol the State of South Carolina, En titled, "An Act to Establish Local Boards of Health in the Cities and Incorporate Towns of the State and to Define the Powers Thereof” Ap proved January 5th., A. D. 1895; It is hereby Ordered and Ordained: That the Town of Darlington shall be and hereby is divided into five wards, designated as follows, to wit: Ward 1. Shall compromise all the territory lying to the West of Rail road Street, beginning at the crossing of the C. B. and N. railroad , extend ing down Railroad Street to Pearl Street, orcssing Pearl Street down through Earle’s Avenue to Orange Street, down Orange Street to the East and down the Street dividing the Factory grounds from the resi dence of G. W. Dargau to Swift Creek —the same being the Town limits. Ward 2. Shall embrace all the ter ritory lying between the Eastern line of Ward 2 to Ward’s Lane, in a straight line from Swift Creek, through Ward’s Lane to thsTown limits towards the South. Ward 8. Shall embrace all the ter ritory lying between Ward’s Lane and Main Street, the Ka'tern bound ary of which shall begin at the cross ing of Swift Creek by Main Street, ex tending to the crossing of C. S. A N. railroad on Main Street, so that the said ward will be bounded on the North by Swift Creek, on the Sonth by C. S AN. railroad, East by Main Street, and West by the Eastern line of Ward 2. Ward 4. Shall comprise all territory lying to the Sonth and South-East of C. S. and N. railroad to a straight line designated by Ward’s Lane on the West; said Ward to be bounded North by C. 8, A N. railroad, on the East by Swift Creek and the corporate limits, and on the West by Extern bound ary of Ward 2, Ward 5; Shall compromise all the territory lying North of C. 8. A N. ■ ailroad and East of Main Street, bounded on the North by Swift Creek, 011 the East by Swift Creek, on the South by the C. S. A N. railroad, and on the West by the eastern boundary of Ward 8. f By Order of Council: J. W. EVANS. Ma\ 23-fit, Clerk. FIRE The following Companies aye represented by the undersigned, and are prepared to transact current business at lowest possible rates which guarantee security of policy holders. LIVERPOOL AND LONDON AND GLOBE, AMERICAN OF PHILADELPHIA. BRITISH AMERICA OF CANADA, NORWICH UNION OP ENGLAND, WESTERN OF CANADA. AETNA OF HARTFORD, f pQENIR OP LONDON, ROYAL OP ENGLAND. Mrs. Lucy M. Norment, Agent, DARLINGTON, 8. a u WOODS & “ desire to announce to the people of Darlington County in general, and to the ladies in particular, that they are now opening, at their handsome establishment on the east side of the Public Square, a large and varied assortment of SPRING Which for STYLE AND PRICES is not to be excelled in this section of South Carolina. Give them a call and examine their beautiful stock before decid ing where you will make your Spring purchases. THE COMPANY, whose place of business is at their new warehouse on Russel Street, near the C. S. & N. Depot, offer to the retail trade, as well as to consumers, in original, unbroken packages, FOR SPOT CASH, a full line of choice family groce ries, at the very lowest wholesale prices. Housekeepers are now re minded that they need not send off to buy their usual barrel of sugar or barrel of flour, and the like, for they can get them just as cheap at their very doors, and , save freight.^ TTART8VILLE RAILROAD. ** June 8, 1894. „ MIXED TRAIN. Leave Harteville 4.30 a 3 Jovann 4.45 a iu Floyd’s 5.05 a m Darlington 5.25 a m Palmetto 5.40 a m Arrive Florence 6.00 a in Leave Florence 9.00 p m Palmetto 9.15 p in Darlington 9.25 p u. Floyds 9.45 p m Jovann 10.00 p m Hartsville 10.15 p m J. F. DIVINE. Gen. Snpt. c. A D. and C. & S. RAILROADS. In effect Jane 3, 1894. MIXED TRAIN Leave Wadesboro 2.00 p m Bennett's 2.25 p m Morven’s 2.40 p m McFarland 2 55 p m Cheraw 8.45 p m Cash's 4.10 pm Society Hill 4.40 p in Dove’s 5.15 pm Floyd’s 5.30 pm Darlington 6.05 p in Palmetto 6.20 p m Arrive Florence 6.45 p m Leave Florence 8.15 a m Palmetto 8.40 a m Darlington - 9.15 a m Floyd’s 9.40 am Dove's 9 55 a m Society Hill 10 35 a m Cash’s 10.55 a m C be raw 11.40 am McFarland 12.20 p m Morven’s 12.35 p m Bennett's 12.50 p m Arrive Wadesboro 1.10 p m Local Freight. Leave Darlington 4 30 p m Palmetto 4.42 p m Arrive Florence 5.00 p m Leave Florence 8.15 a ra Palmetto 8.40 a ra Arrive Darlington 8 55 a ra A. F. KAVENEL. President. N ORTH EASTERN RAILROAD. In effect Noy. 18,1894; SOUTH BOUND. .No. 85. Leave Florence...., 4. i0 a m Lanes 4.20 a m Arrive Charleston 0.10 a ra No. 28. Leave Florence 7.85 p m Kingstree 8.46 p m Lanes 6.07 p m Arrive Charleston 11.13 p ra No. 58. Leave Lanes 7.05 p m Arrive Charleston 8.40 p m NORTH BOUND. No. 78. Leave Charleston 4.12 a m Lanes 0.80 a us Kingstree 6-49 a m Arrive Florence 7.65 a in No. 82. Leave Charleston 4.80 p m Lanes 6.08 p m Kingstree 0.23 p ra Arrive Florence 7.15 p in No. 52. Leave Cha le ton 7.00 a m Arrive Lanes 8.35 s m No. 62 runs through to Columbia via Central R. R. of 8. O. Train Nos. 78 and 14 runs via Wilson and Fayetteville—Short Line—and makes close connection for all points North. J. F. DIVINE, Gen. Snpt. VY ILMINGTON, COLUMBIA * AUGUSTA RALROAD. In effect May 20, 1895. SOUTH BOUND. No. 55. Leave Columbis Arrive Sumter.... Leave Columbia Arrive Snmter Leave Wilmington *3.30 p m Leave Marion 6.24 p in Arrive Florence 7.05 p m Leave Florence *7.30 p m Arrive Snmter 8.88 p m Leave Sumter 8.38 p ra Arrive Columbia 10.00 p m No. 51. Leave Florence *3.15 a m Arrive Snmter 4 19 a u No. 52. Leave Snmter —.... *9.48 a m Arrive Columbia 11.00 am No. 62 runs through from Charles ton via Central Railroad; leaving Lanes 8.38 a m, Manning 9 15 a m. NORTH BOUND. No. 58. • *5.20 am ■ , 6.43 a m Leave Sumter 0.48 a m Arrive Florence . 8.00 a m Leave Florence 8.25 a m Leave Marlon 9.06 a m Arrive Wilmington 11.60 am No. 58. *4.25 p m 5.48 p m No. 50. Leave Snmter *6.05 p m Arrive Florence 7.15 p m •Daily. tDaily except Sunday. No. 58 runs thicugu to unarleston via central Railroad, arriving Man ning 6.21 p m. Lanes 7.00 p is charleston8.40 pm. Trains on Sonth and North Caro- Jlna R. R., leave Elliott 7.02 p. m., ar rive Blshopville 7.39 p. in., Lucknow 8.10 p. m. Returning, leave Luck now 6.30 a. in., BUhopville 7.00 a. m., arrive Elliott 7.38 a. m. Daily except Sunday. Trains on Wilmington A Conway R. K., leave Chadbourn at 10.20 a m, ar rive at Conway 12.85 p m, returning leave Conway 2.30 p m, arrive Chad- bourn 5 00 p. m., leave Chadbourn 5.85 p m, arrive at Hub 6.20 p m, re turning leave Hub 8.15 a m, arrive at Chadbourn 9.00 a m. Daily exepet Son lay. Trains leave Pregnalls 8.15 p. m., Summerton 4.47 p. m., Sumter 5.50 p. in., Darlington 7.20 p. m., Ben- ■ettsville 8.19 p, m., arrive Hamlet 9.15 p- m. Returning, leave Hamlet 6.15 a. m., Bennettsville 7.11 a. m., Darlington 8.11 a. m., Snmter 9.45 a. m, Summerton 10.40 a. m., arrive Pregnalls 12.15 p. m. Daily exoep Sunday. JOHN r, DIVINE, Genl Sip*,