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I Special Reauests h Ib writing to thia office on basinee^ elwnje giro your name and Poet office I - addreee ^ 1 Business letters and commnnica- tiona to be published, ahoald^bewritten on separate sheets, and the object of each clearly indicated by necessary note when required. 8. Articles for publication should be written in a clear, legible hand, and on only one side of the page. 4, All changes in adrertisements must racb us on Friadr. r VOL. VII. NO. 41. BARNWELL C. H., S. C., THURSDAY, JUNE 26, 1884. 12.00 a Year. l A PLEASANT STORY. T8|iw in ye pleasant olden time; ffh, many years ago, When husking bees and singing schools Were all the fun, you know. The singing school in Tarrytown— A quairil’bld town in tliune-^' *— * Was wisely taught and grandly led By a young man named Paine. A gallant gentleman was Paina, Who liked the lasses well; Bnt best he liked Miss Patience White, One night the singing school had met; Young Paine, all carelessly, Had turned the leares and said. “Well sing On page one-seventy.” “Sec gentle patience smiles on pain." On Paine they all then smiled. But not so gently as they might; And he, confuted and wild, Searched quickly for another piece, As quickly gave it put; The merriment, suppressed before, Bose now into a shout. - i These were the words thst met his eyes (He sahk down with a groan), “Oh, give me grief for other's woes, And patience for my Own !” —Alice M. Hobcrlt, in Gocl Cherr. X A SURF-STATION NO. 9. BY REV. in WARD A. RAWD. There were two persons sitting on the doorstep of a station of the life-saving service. One was Will Plympton and the other liked to write down his name and calling as “Bam Walker, Surf man, Station 9.” They were looking across the white, chilly sands to the sea, that under the tearing, exasperating strokes of the wind hourly grew more and more violent. The clouds had a scowling look. It was not a disturbed sky simply, angry hero and there, but everywhere its face was one of settled, ng)y, morose- ness. “Mischief brewin’," said Sam. “Yes; the wind has been busy at some thing fof the past twenty-four hours,” replied Will. “How white and ngly that surf is ! Looks to me as if it was all full of sharks’ teeth, white and hard.’'/ “Somebody will feel them when the, storm breaks—at any rate, before it is over." “Yes; I s’poao the vessel is on the water that has been quietly movin’ on to meet its doom in this storm, and didn’t know it more than you and I know the future." All this time sea and sky had been growing blacker. Keeper Joel Barney, the official head of the crew at Station 9, stepped out of the station, and the conversation was interrupted. When Sam and Will wfcre alone again, Sam said: “That sea and me feel alike, I guess.” “Why?’’ “Oh, I am not at all easy.” Here Sam’s face seemed to darken like the sky. “What are you thinking of?” ‘Tin thinktn’ of somebody that wronged me once. That was in old England. We were both boatmen and there was an extra chance at work we both wanted, and Payne Chesley set on foot some stories that lost me my old place and kept me out of a better one. Lies! lies!” said Sam, vehemently— “all of them.” “Well, didn’t people sec thrtt ?” “Yes, but too late to help me. If it had been the truth, it couldn’t for the tune have hurt me mews.” “What’s false will wash off like mud. It’s only what is true that sticks in and stays and hurts.” Bnt Sam was not disposed to dwell on this side of the subject He arose, strode off grumbling, and sat down in the station doorway. “What makes mo think of Payne Chesley, I don’t know. / I feel ngly as that sea looks, and I don’t know but I could put Payne Chesley under the water if I had him. Seems to me ’twouldi -be just sweet to do that. Bnt that isn’t the thingf for an old chap like me,” he said, meditatively. “We’ve got to swal- Icr those feelin’s.” Still blacker grew soa and sky. A very savory odor of old Java, fried potatoes and biscuit now came from the station kitchen, and the crew gathered for supper. “Storm broke,” said Keeper Barney, amid the rattling dishes; “I see the rain on the window near me.” Just then Silas Peaslee came in from the beach and his dripping “sou’wester” told the story of the arrival of the rain. “A bad-night,” said Silas, “if a vessel gets oo Howlin’ Pint.” But no vessel was so foolish as to do that fatal thing. The men on duty patrolled the beach ss the regulations require. Four times between sunset and sunrise they tramped from two to four miles each side of the station. Each patrolman earned his Coston signals, which could be lighted st once, burning with a red flame and warning off any vessel that might be discovered —iling too near the shore, at Announcing to any wrecked vessel thst help was near. But, though keen eyes watched and quick ears listened, there was no'sign of vessels in danger or dis tress. There was only that near and in- j oesaant thunder in the darkneaa, that awful tour of an invisible anger which "ynaniieatcd Hadf in an occaatonal throw o4 cold surf abont the fast of the patrol men venturing loo near the edge of the sea. The morning lighted up a confused moss of white, struggling billows under block, heavy masses of storm cloud that swept the sea with pitiless discharges of rain- The men at the station were at breakfast’ when Arnold Rankin rushed in shooting: “There’s a wreck off here 1" “Boom—m—m 1” came the report of a gun from the sea. Keeper Barney, springing from his seat and npsetting the chair in his eagerness. “Our sorfboat cannot live in that sea. Open the boat room doors. Man the beach wagon, boys.” Ont npon the sands the cart was quick ly rushed, and a wreck gun and other apparatus taken from it The gun was placed in position, and a shot carrying with it a light, strong line sent over the wreck. “They’ve got it!” said Sam Walker, looking toward the vessel, around which boiled the white surf. “They have made it fast 1” “Take two half hitches with the shot line round that whip,” shonted the keeper, soon rignaling to the wreck tc hanl on board. The “whip" was a larger line donbled through n single prillcy-block, and It was patiently hauled ou board, followed by a hairser. These two lines were made fast, the hawser being secured above the “whip” or endless line. “Send the life-car, boys,” said Keeper Parnoy. “Quick!” Every moment the storm seemed to be gathering more force^ as if to resist the breve "men in their work of resene. More heavily rolled the waves upon the shore; the wind charged np and down the beach, and ronghly the rein splashed the faces of the snrfmen. And yet how the crew worked, springing from duty to duty and cheering heartily when they saw the life, ear ruling along the hawser and hauled ont by means of the whip ! “They’ve loaded her up," was the news that Sam’s keen eyes enabled him to communicate. “Four men have got into her.” ••Mam asnore , snouten the Keeper; <|ud safely across that turbulent sweep of surf came the life-car. The hatch was removed, and four men sprangnpor the ben$h. “Haul out!” was the keeper's ready command, and back to the wreck went the car. “It s a steamer, the men say,’ was Arnold Rankin’s announcement to his mates. “She’s in a bad fix and will break np afore night, they think." Again and again went the life-ear on its jonrney of mercy to the wreck. At last arrived those who said: “Nobody else on board.” “Look here !” exclaimed one of the steamer’s crew, coming fromttfe station, where the rescued men had found shelter; “there was one sick man. Has he come ? He is not at the station. ” The keeper looked around npon his little circle of helpers. “Boys,” he said, “there’s a sick man al>oard. Are you sure, though, he did nor come ?” he asked, suddenly turning to his informant. “Sure as I am here. Payne Chesley is not at the station, and he is not on the beach.” “Payne Chesley 1” Will Plympton heard the name, and instantly looked at Sam’s face. He saw Sam’s startled, intent gaze, and then Sam said to the keeper: “Somebody must go and get him. I’ll volunteer.” “I’ll go! I’ll go I” said sbverel. “Your ropes out there are weak,” said one of the steamer’s crew; “there has been so much strain on ’em. One will be enough to go in that car; send your strongest man. No easy thing bringing a sick man to it. Whew I If he ain’t np 1 And be signals, too 1 I’d go if I wasn’t braised so.” Upon that wreck the sharper eyes ot the company oonld make out the form of a man waving something—waVing a plea for life on the edge of that horrible ghostly ocean-pit of water. “I’m the strongest,” said Sam Walker; proudly, and in proof he raised his heavy, moscular arm. i Everybody knew it was as Sam as serted. ~ Into the ear ho went and the Batch- was closed after him. Keenly every eye watched the passage of the oar to the steamer. “I hope the ropes will hold,” mut tered the keeper, looking off in the face of the driving storm. “Hurrah 1 He’s theqp 1” shouted the men. , ' ^ V * There was a season at anxious wait- in S- j • • 4 “Hatfl kshore 1” shouted the keeper. “Ker—r—ful, boy* f” The oar was near the beach, when suddenly the ropes gave way and over in the surf helplessly rolled the ear. "Form a line, boys. Look close and wade ont as far aa you can,” shouted the keeper. ■* And, so, reaching out into that hungry, grasping sea, they snatched from it the food that the “sharks' teeth” in the surf had almost won. “Hurrah for Ham Walker.!” waa the bidding of Keeper Barney to his men. Bat 8am Walker did not need the pleaaats afforded by that ovation. He made this onrrfaarinu to Will Hymptoe. “I thought it would be sweet to pot Payne Chealey under the water, but I tell you, Will, it waa a good deal sweeter to pull him out.” A TRAGEDY RECALLED. DEATH OT OKO. W. CONKI-ING, THB BLAYKK OF W.U. HAVBRMTICK. The Hoea* la (be “PnrU” Flat-An Krrlaa \Vn«an’« Mulrlde-A Wronged ilmtbnnri’n Feraiveaeon. b [From the N. Y.-Telegram.1 The news received from San Francisco of the death there of George W. Conk- ling recalls the terrible tragedy of March, 1883, which took place at the “Paris” Flat, No. 341 West Twenty-third street; With Conkling’s death the throe princi pal figures of the tragedy have passed away. Conkling died of consumption, his erring sister, Mrs. Uhler, committed suicide by taking morphine; the man who led her from the path of dnty, Wilbnr H. Haverstick, died at the hands of her brother; and the only person connected with the tragedy left is her husband, J. Clement Uhler, a resident of New Jersey. STORY OF THB TRAOKDT. Mr. Uhler lived in San Francisco, Cal., and did bnsinesa as a mining broker. In 1871 he met Emma H. Conkling, a beautiful girl, fell in love with and married her. As a business man he was moderately successful, and when the tide of mining speculation set back eastward he traveled with it So, too, did Wilbur H. Haverstick. He was also a mining broker in San Francisoo, and though only thirty-two years of age he had achieved a marked success in his business. Uhler and his wife came to New York about three years ago, and Haverstick canf^doeut the same time. Both became members of the New York Mining Stock Exchange. Haverstick was one of the original members of the American Mining Stock Exchange, and was the first to leave that for the New York Exchange. Uhler and Haverstick l>ecame partners in business, and had their office at No. 18 Wall street, under the firm name of J. C. Uhler k Co. Haverstick became a frequent visitor at Uhler’s home, at No. 913 Seventh ave nue, where he dwelt with his wife and two children. _ THB BBTARATIOB. Mrs. Uhler’s estrangement from her husband followed and the matter reached publicity through a suit which Uhler brought against Haverstick. This was about two years ago. On her side, Mrs. Uhler brought a suit against her hus band for having refused her access to her former home. Both these suits were pending when a pistol in the hands of George Conkling entered a nolle pros. Uhler and Haverstick separated in busi ness. Haverstick had a brother and a mother living in San Francisco. The report of this social scandal of course reached the ears of Mrs. Conkling, the mother of Mrs. Uhler, in San Francisco, and it was at her solioitation that Conk ling, her son, came on here from Nevada in the latter part of February, 1883, to do what he could to save the family honor and spare the family pride. a brother’s sbaroh. Conkling, who was a government sur veyor, and nntil shortly before the shoot ing engaged in making field notes of the State of Nevada, left his headquarters at Reno early in February, 1883, and came to New York city on the 28th of that month, with the avowed intention of dis covering his missing and erring sister. He finally learned that she was living in the “Paris.” He endeavored to effect a reconciliation between her and her hus- and, but after days of parleying the young woman npset all negotiations by declaring that as she had been untrue to Uhler she would never live with him again. She, however, consented to abandon her paramour and return with her brother '<o his Borne in the West. She agreed to meet her brother on tb# night of the shooting. Ho came to the “Paris” flat for her and met Haverstick, who knew nothing of the arrangement The young surveyor told him, when Haverstick flew into a rage and, seizing a china statuette, threw it at Conkling. The latter thereupon drew a revolver and shot Haverstick, who died shortly after. Conkling waa arrested, acquitted by a Coroner’s jury, but afterward waa placed under bonds for trial. The in dictment against him was dismissed in -February last With his sister, ho soon after left for Reno, Nevada. The next heard of her was on the morning of Feb. 14 last, whan she was taken in a dying condition from the boose of a woman named Adams, but known as “The Water Queen,” at 38 West Twenty- ninth street. She was taken to the New York Hospital, where she died in a few hours. She had left her brother and friends hi the Wfst, and going to New York oity, entered npon a life of dissipa tion. Often to the women with whom she aseooiated she expressed her abhor rence of her brother for killing the man she loved. She was arrested several times for disorderly conduct but never punished. She became very poor and on the nfght of February 13 took mor phine with suicidal intent Her body was saved from a pauper’s burial by her husband, who had it interred in a New Jersey Cemetery. THE LIME-KILN CLUB. WORDS OF WISDOM FROn FARADDMt y HA1X. The PreaMent DlabaaSa aa A at I afar aa4 Bel* Ilia Adrift. A LANDMARK OOKK. “I BOLD," is the way the oowboy bo gins hie i [Tran tho Detrojt Fra* Trass., By actual count there were forty-three members of the club coughing and sneezing at the moment the triangle sounded, and it was not until four aoia- ntea after the echoes died away that fee President arose from behind hh desk and said: “If Socrates Spikeroot am in de hall dis evenin’ I would like to see him out heah in front of do desk.” Socrates had just crowded himself in between the stove and the wood-box, calculating to get warmth enough to last him nntil the next meeting, and he didn’t look over-pleased at bejpg dis turbed. When he had limped along to the desk, one hand in his poeket and the other digging into his wool, Brother Gardner con tinned: “How long have you bin a member of dis club?” “ ’Boat six months, sah.” “Urn I It has been ’boat three months since I fast had my eyes on you, so’ to night you seber yonr oonnexon wid dis club. Misser Spikeroot, it waa under stood when you jined dis club dat you was a barber. Has you barbed anybody or anythin’ since dat date?” "I—I—no, sah.” “On de oontreryf yon has loafed aroun saloons an’ policy shops an’ queer places, an’ no man has known you to do an honest day’s work. We doan’ hanker artfer giob members as yon. When a ;x)o’ man kin lib widont labor people have a right to be snspiahus of him. Brudder Giveadam Jones, you will escort dis pnsson to de doah. If, when he gits dar’, he should utter any remark deroga tory to de character of de Lime-Kiln Clnb, yon needn't put de Bogardns kicker at work. Let him go in peace. What he kin say won’t hurt us, an’ you might kick too hard an’ break a leg.” After the late deceased had been shown ont and order restored, the President said : “Gem’len, if dar am any mo’ agita tors in de hall I want ’em to listen close ly. Socrates Spikeroot need to be a hard-workin’ man. All to onoe he got de ideah dat /apital was oppreasin' la bor. He quit aimin’ $12 per week be- kase he didn’t want to be oppressed. In a month he became a dead-beat While it am a serious offence fur capitalists to oppress labor, it am all right for a kicker to go aronn’ borrowin’ money, ninnin’ in debt, an’ stealin’ .his wood. A few weeks ago Mister Spikeroot got lone some, an’ began to agitate. He went to var’us laborin’ men an’ convinced ’em dat de man who aims his $12 or 114 per week or tor turn ont and mob de capital ists who furnish him de chance. “He am now an agitator. He has got facks an’ Aggers to prove dat de work- in’ man who owns his cottage and kin aim a good support fur wife an’ ohiU’en am de most oppressed bein’ on de face of dis airth. When a saloon turns him out he threatens to boycott it. When a man refuses to lend him money he am called a bloated monopolist. When his wife wants shoes or his ohill’en cry fur bread, he comforts’em wid de statement dat America am buildin’ up an aria toe- racy to lord it over de poo’ men an’ grind ’em to powder. If Misser Spike root has left any friends behind, an op portunity will now be giben ’em to pick np deir hats an’ feet an’ trebble.” There was a deep silenoe for a minute, and as no one traveled the President signed for the Secretary to prodfeed with the regular order of business. Thad. Stevens’ Strong Individuality. * — * % 7~— His whole life was shadowed by a de formity in the foot, which cansed slight lameness and gave a morbid sensitive ness to his nature. While in New York he desired to join the lodge ci Free Mreons, but this physical defect rendered him ineligible. He was ranch chagrined and became a most violent and pro nounced opponent of the order, never losing an opportunity to denounce it in n ns pairing terms. Thia hatred took a strong political bias and from that time he was one of the most bitter and unre lenting anti-Masons. His strong individ uality impressed every one who ever met him and his sayings and doings am still remembered in many characteristic inci dents. Judge Durkee, who, like Stevens, was a Vermonter, and waa an Hdant and devoted admirer of that gentleman, told he was once engaged in trying a with him and received a letter which was positively unreadable. He gave the letter to i friend promising a liberal percentage of the prospective fee if she would translate it. She earned her reward after some hours’ hard work on the epistle. ~Hti writing consisted at two or three letters in the beginning of a word, followed by an irregular aeroarL He was onoe asked" to mad a letter of advice which he bad written a client He glanced over it, found himself quite unable to read it, and handad it baek with “Humph, I don’t write letters to read myself. I wrote it far jfoa to read.” A gentleman onoe wrote *~V'rg aa opinion, but neglected to ineloee the cu* tomary fee. With grim homer 8te> ver.3 returned a blank sheet of paper fag belt pbat.—PhilmdelpMa Frtm. me The rtaeef,Where thi Befere the Battle el Tree tee. An interesting landmark has just been demolished in Trenton, N. J., to make room for a Masonic Temple about to be erected. It.waa.a low briok building of considerable aim, built at King and Second, now Warren and State streets, in 1708, by Abraham Hunt, and occu pied by him as s store and dwelling. In 1778 Mr. Hunt was postmaster. His was said to be the wealthiest man in a wide circuit. His store was especially noted for its abundant stock of good liquors. He was called a Tory, although the imputation is denied by his descend ants. When the Hessians occupied Trenton, Colonel Rahl, their command er, and his officers, quickly discovered the excellence of Hunt’s liquid supplies, and his store became their headquarter* when they had leisure. On Christina* night, Colonel Rahl, Lieufenant-Oolonel Lehofer, of the Losaberg Regiment, Major Von Decchow, of the Kinphauaen Regiment, and other choice spirit* gathered at Hnnt’s for a oarouse in honor of the day. At eleven, when the merri ment was at its height, s Tory fanner from the surrounding country dashed np to the store and sent in by a colored servant a letter to Colonel Rahl, which the latter thrust into his pocket Not long afterward the soopd of firing waa heard in the street, and Colonel Rahl rushed out in time to find Washington in possession of the town, and to reoeivo his death wound in King street, within s hundred yards of the store. Von Deeohow was shot dead at the same mo ment, Rahl lived a little while alter be ing carried back to Hnnt’s. The letter which he had no time to reed, would have told him thst Washington was crossing the Delaware and wonld attack him be fore morning. Mr. Hunt continued to be postmaster and carry on the business in the old store for many years. After the building was used ss s hotel—the Washington House —for many years, and was then devoted to business purposes. Its reputation as a place for obtaining good liquors never deserted it. At the time its demolition began a fashionable sample-room occu pied a part of its ground floor and a drug store the rest. The uppir story had long )>een delapidated and untenanted bnt on account of its location the lower story was one of the most profitable pieces of property in the city. Dip Poor Boy. A dejected and forlorn boy of about 10 years old confided in the cook the other day; he told her if hit mother asked tot him to say that he did not care for any dinner. Aa he expected, his mother came to look for him just before the dinner hour, and was surprised to find that, although there was company and some extra dishea of which the boy waa fond, he did not wish for any din ner. When closely pressed as to the reason, he said, in an embarrassed way : “Because I haven’t any manners.” TYie poor, self-conscious boy wss certainly “under conviction” of his sins, and his mother wss impressed wife fee thought that too much fault had been found wife him at the table. I suppose it is a fact feat there is s period in most boys’ lives when they are honestly awk ward; that is, they are naturally so, and scolding or fault-finding, in the common sense in which feat term is used, is cot fee remedy; it is rather to be found in a kindly explanation, and above all things in that strong incentive which a good example frequently supplies. The Beet Culture. IB LIFI WORTH UTINffl Quarterly, wuri-ai . tracts asadeoa liberal i Outrsct advertising is Jays after fret tuwrtkm, wise stipulated. - Mo coaaaaaieatioa will he paMsshsl mlsss scc'impaafed by thei '.revs of fee writer, not nrceawrtiy tor ibiicatlm but ass tuaran*j .vf good T.1F. PEOPLE, CstnwHl C. II. 8. G. Farmers in England are taking to bee growing. In Norfolk they have under taken to grow this season at least 900 seres of sugar beet from selected seed, and on the faith of this an association has been formed, which, long before fee beet is reedy, will have $100,000 worth of plant on fee ground reedy to make sugar as fast as fee roots oome in. - The fanner will get $5 a ton for the white beet delivered st fee works, and ss he can grow from fifteen to twenty tons to fee acre he will, after allowing for heavy manuring and all coat of land, labor, seed and transportation, be able to reckon, even in an indifferent season, upon a re turn of at least $7$ an acre, which most seem to him, after recent experience, “wealth beyond the dreams of avarice,” se Dr. Johnson said of fee revenue of Barclay’s brewery. A Batter Adveeate’s Walk. Ralph Beaumont, of Elmira, President of fee Knights of Labor, will make a tour of this continent on foot, from Maine to Oatifomk. He will start from Bangor on July S, and upsets to make upward of twenty miles a day, detrearing a lecture every Mgkt at boom town on the roots oat the labor end anti-monop oly questions. Ha will sdvosata the akims of Bader ss a Presidential candi date. Mr. Bsenmnnt expects to reach California before fee okas of the cam- P®»C»- Thu New York Sun publishes an alphabetical list of oil dwtingnkhed who attend slagging ehioksn fights, etc., la that city, Dr. Talwaa* naja That H Itapaada Ratlrrlr aa (he Ktad al l.lfe Data Ltvaa. Dr. Talmege preached on Sunday on the question “la Life Worth Living?” If we leave to the evolationiati to gaeas where we oome from, said he, and to the theologians to prophesy where we are going, we still have left for oonskleration fee fact that we are hero. I am not surprised that everybody asks the ques tion, “Is life worth living?” Holonsoo _ says it is not, but Jeremiah snyaTit is. A j diversity of opinion exists in oar time | also. A young man wife great prospeeta will say “Yes;” a man forty years of age, whose every step has been s stum- j bio, will say "No.” If you ask me the question I answer, It depends on fee ' kind of life you live. In the first piece, I remark thst s life i of mere money-getting is always a fail ure, because you will never get ss much ss yon want. The poorest people in feb country .ore the millionaires, and next to them those who have half a million. There is not a scissors grinder in New York or Brooklyn so anxious to make money aa those men who have piled up fortunes for years. The disease of aceu- mnlationhaa eaten into them. That is not a life worth living. There are too many earthquakes in it, too many shipwrecks, too many perditions. They build their castles and open their picture galleries and make every inducement for happi ness to come, but she will not , Bo also a life feat chiefly strives for worldly approval fa a failure. The two most unfortunate men in fee United States for fee next six months will be the two Presidential nominees. Two great reservoirs of malediction have been gradually filling up, and aboat midsum mer they will be brimming full, and a hose will be attached to them aad they will begin to play on the two noariaeee, and they will have to stand and take ti the falsehood, the oaiieatore, the veanm, fee filth, and they will be roiled over in it and choked wife It To win that priv ilege a hundred candidelea are striving. The same thing fa aeon on a rmnllir scale in the strife for social position. Good saorafa aad intelligence era not necessary; bat wealth, or the show of wealth, fa absolutely indispensable. It don’t make, any difference how you get yonr wealth, if you only get it Per haps you get it by failing four or five times—the most rapid way of aootxmufa- tion in thia ocontry. If a man fails once he is not so very well off; bat if he falls twice he fa comfortable, and by fee time he foils ferae times he fa affluent Bat when you. really lose your mousy, how quick they drop you I High social Ufa uT constantly in a change—insecurity dominant, wretchedness eatferoMd sad a Ufa not worth living. A Ufa of sin, a life of pride, a Ufa of wurldUaem, a Ufa of indulgence, a Ufa consecrated to fee world, fee flesh aad the devil, fa a fail ure, an infinite failure. Now I will show you a Ufa that fa worth living. A young man says:—“I am here at twenty yearn ot ago. I have sixty years to live. How assay kind words can I say and how many kind deeds eon I do? I will fay. I will de velop this body by all good habits and keep this etml swept aad garnished. Thoti I mast rsasmsbsr that years are only a brief chief existence.” That young ten life, fa buffeted and perplexed, falls but rises again. The main eoone of his Ufa fa in the right direction. You can chisel on his tombstone the words:— “His life was worth living.” A Ufa for God, a useful Ufa, a Ufa far others, fa always worth Uving. Whether year Ufa be oonspieooas or innoeepiisnias. it fa worth Hviag if yon tire aright Bern am ber feet this Ufa if only introductory to an eternal Ufa. The lost letter of the word Time Is fee first letter of the word Eternity. THE HUM0K0US PAPERS. WHAT WR FIND IN Tfll* * #YEE THIN WKKK. mtmmm Oils De Smith imagines feat be is the best solo singer in Austin, bat else thinhs so. Whenever he is _ at a social gathering, he bribes body present to enll on him for a and then be warbles forth a that has a depressing effoot even on the real estate ia that aeighborheed. Affat a performance of thia kind a few afghfa ago, Mrs. MeSpUIkins, who duos Ml livsf happily with her husband, remarked to Goa, wife whom she fa quite famftfar: “Oh, how I wish my husband could ring like that” “Ah r responded Gas; “I expost you would Hke it. There would be more harmony in the family.” —-i.— , .. “It’s not feat, but if he sung Hke you, I’d have no trouble getting a divoree on the ground of cruelty and brutal treat ment” Then Guo ceased to aaaile aad — —Texas Siftings. n HAD TO LA win. Old Dan had used hie neighbor’s fence as firewood and he was aooordlagty brought before the court to answer for the same. “Have you any lawyer for defense?” asked the judge as Don took his pioaat “No, sor, I hob not,” replied the negro. “Ease yo’ know, jedge, taint de fanes what needs a lawyer, hit am dfa po’ niggah dot am in for it; I apes yer better pint one for him. "—CHneinnaH ComtnercUU. Tain age’s flew ot the Poaie. “There fa one very mean thing about human nature,” said Dr. Talmage in his Friday evening talk, “and feat fa the disposition to jump on a man when he k down. Ever and anon fee community must have a scapegoat. At the present time fee soepegbet fa Ferdinand Ward. §y denouncing him mm Ot large expe rience hope to have their own foolhardi ness alleviated. He baa no doubt wronged others, bat no more than othesn have wronged him. Yoa wrong nay when yen neeeasarily potoa tions greater than he oaa hear. Put into a young man’s hands $1,000,000 be longing to other people aad ha wife taking your three per cent, without asking how he gats it and yoa have sinned against him mors than he can ever sin against you. “Put the beet phase you eaa on every men’s misfortune. Do not call it ras cality when it may have been’ only a mistake. Divide up among many the condemnation which yon are templed to pat upon two or throe. By calm faith in God, heq^oooi down the panto. Soro all indiscriminate excoriation. Bsmsm ber feat if a man loses mousy hi atoeks he deserves just os much soadolsacs ss if he lost H in selling dry goods or gro ceries. Be careful in your anathemas af Wall street to draw the line those who do a legitimate those who make it the sacking down the fnrtuam of We hear « groat deal of euritfas, bat the only of the name are TBomus Struggling Burgeon—’’No, deer, I cannot go calling with you to-night,” His Wife—“But you promised that yoa would.” “I know it, deer, but oar finances an very low and I must not loss a chance to get a fee.” “Bat what chance will yon lose ? No patients have sent to yon for a week ” “I know H, deer, hat I expect to be far a very important sargiea! i, perhaps a broken leg, before the evening is over.” “Where lor “Across the way. Mrs. Brown over feme fa honae nfantng, and I just saw Mr. Brown going boaM wife n step lad der. "-P/Wfa. Poll He noun. ~ A farmers' mntaal hwaronee maspaay, doing boainsas ia Virginia, had a meet ing ot directors the other day, and after the transection of routine of the Board rose op and said: “I notice among fee bills of < one for $B for printing o meat on 4,000 pastel cards.” “That’s all right,” expiafawd fee Frso- ident “How all right? Don’t a secretary at a salary of yearr “Yes, and the aeoretary the copy and eonlraeted far Umjariat- “I don’t say he didh’t, batroHHe fa know what basin ms ha had toi for any snsn printing him psM and ink. It was Ms duty la m ends, afar, and I, for one, kick egoinet any ana — Wail Streat News ereoiAL rath worn sncuLATono. A Brooklyn man who hit wheat for a few thonmnil dollars last week rushed around and rented a brown-stooe front, sod then sought fee services of a furni ture mover. ' “I’ll fake it by the joi? nod do fee fair thing by you,” replied the mover. “Weil, how fair r ’Til say Ifty dollars for the two.” “What two?” “Why, fee moving this weak into the brown-stone, and the moving, hi about a \ month, from that into a cheep frame bouse in the suburbs | I always job the two moves together in the ease of a groin speculator I” Mr. B.—“Hen fa snmsihing in this paper that yon ought In know.” Mrs. B.—“What fa their Mr. B.—“A recipe far getting rid of rote and mice. It says that wild mint scattered about the bourn will soon aiaar Mrs. BL—“Mint? That fa what yon an oa awfully food of, isn’t it?” Mr. B.—“Well, yes, I rather like mint Bat I woodr.- why it < Jk—“Probably . usn they i Hm —they: or.etud • feel fete man al fee boon herd drinker. Mi that therefore the eapboerd is empty.” Mr. B. changed fee subjeot—PMJs» delpMa Cbtt. A blly htat Knurr. Mrs. Blank—‘ Whets silly statement 1 Hme fa a Mow York paper attyffiff feat ot ftv.Iuuooblefadfa* ban thok own milUoery r ■ay it waa.” “Anybody might know