University of South Carolina Libraries
< > ., J Humor and Philosophy V . By DUNCAN M. SMITH , , i REFLECTED GLORY. ' 1 . Somehow we like to touch the edge Of greatness and to feel That we're acquainted with the chap "Who pulled off some big deal; To tell our neighbors that we met The man at some resort Who first imported elephants Or something of that sort. . It makes us feel important quite And swelled in every way 1 To know when witnessing a piece The man who wrote the play; If we have ever met the one Who plays the title role A common person couldn't touch Us with a fishing pole. - I -"> - When down a list of candidates We spy a friendly name, A man who once lived next to us, We feel the breath of fame; We think that is sufficient cause, . Although his claims are slim, Why every person that we know Should cast a vote for him. P< When riding in a trolley car To know the motorman Is quite sufficient in a way Our self esteem to fan. And 1f we have acquaintance with The copper on the beat The man who saw us would be sure We owned bpth sides the street. Different Points of View. ||k; V . "He is the father of twins." jfesf! "He must have had the stork bribed." "No; the trouble was he didn't have i Fitted the Name. "There is great excitement among ; the members of the Sore Thing Mining iAampany" "Whaf 8 the matter with them." jp "Their prospect isn't panning out" < "What are they going to do abont it?' , "That is what they would like to hnow. The board of directors is just ttorw sitting as a committee of the hole." Ably Assisted. It's good Intentions, 'so they say, ^ ~ Which pave the road that goes astray, But had Intentions, I should guess, Help in the process more or less. Had Seen Something Like It.* r '"What are they all piling up that for?" asked Uncle Hi. who was Ife watching his first football game. * "The ball Is underneath." explained ?fevT his niece. is that all? 1 thought some ; fakir had throwed a handful of jewelry Into the crowd." Just a Suggestion, y. v When calling- on a lady and '' She says: "No more for you. jSjgiv. I do not like your style or shape, ' Dear sir, and we are through. I wouldn't have you If you owned A million and the mint." Then if a gentleman is bright R&g: v V He's apt to take the hint " Jewelry Preferred. x"He is a.man with a past." "I prefer the other kind." "The coming man. eh?" necessarily. The man with a KHp(tv' Meant to Let It Work, plfc - "How can he get into business again? I beard he is broke." "Well, he says he has a large workNeeds Warming. When cash is fitted out with wings !?%?', And dollars hence go humming, \ Then love grows cold with other things is' When coal Is not forthcoming. Bfe PERT PARAGRAPHS. fOgS. J.- v ______ Consistency may be a jewels but we / haven't noticed any mad rush to pos aees and wear it SSi; i ( A B^0018? ra*?ly begins work until its prS" cause no longer bears pleasant fruit like a soft snap, A but still there palates that prefer the ginger a S / 5Tb 18 no evi" m /1 am I dence of a big | jm . i heart that a man ^ v- X7S\\ A m weare * wide mQ wal8tcoat Thp tronble with the courage of some men Is that its source is both volatile and liquid and too apt to be heady. ? It is not only absolute waste of good material, but is extremely painful to ^ ' the man to hand him an idea seven sizes to big for his brain. A thing that is lucrative enough and asay enough is apt to attain to some degree of respectability. ? i Circumstances altering cases aren't a circumstance to lawyers employed at the same task. m' The good some people do consists mainly In their being perfectly harmless. ' , ? Often we would be happier If the rest of us would Juat let us alone. N.V' * m ' ' ?#% -/ . r . >, I Ga.rd.nl FEEDING SHEEP. Satisfactory Device For Holding H?y. Silage or Grain. In describing a h;:\\ and grain rack a well known sheep feeder writes in National Stockman and Farmer as fol lows: The best kind of a device will depend upon what is to be done with the sheep. If for fattening sheep or those being wintered as stores I have never u hottpr rank than the single one S.1 OLiE BACK. shown in the cut for a side rack or to stand so that the back side of it will form an alley fence, or it may stand out in the pen so sheep can go all around it It can be made double, as is also pictured. In either case the posts should be thirty inches high. The flat part of each side of bottom should be ten inches wide. The slanting pieces of double rack should each be ten inches and put together as snown. in tne single rack the slanting board should be fourteen inches. The bottom strip on both racks should be eight .and the top strip four inches wide respectively. This will make the .uprights between sheep fourteen inches in the clear, and they should lap on both the bottom and top strip far enough to be "nailed firmly with clinch nails. These uprights should be three inches wide and planed so as to,be smooth, and the distance apart will depend upon the size of sheep. Lambs will do welLwith them one foot from the centers, but larger 9 DOUBLE BACK. sheep should have them far enough *- ? _jii ?/vam #ai> ohoan apart SO UltJrtJ Will UC 1W1U LVi ouvv^ to come up and eat without crowding. These strips allow the sheep to come straight up to the rack and eat, but prevent one sheep from crowding all the others out of the rack, which, a stout sheep is sure to do without these crosspieces. .The slanting boards on the bottom have their lower edges slanted off so as to fit tightly upon the bottom board and be well nailed. These racks may be of any convenient length, but if no more than eighteen feet long they will need only three sets of posts or legs. In these racks can be fed hay, silage, roots and grain by being cleaned of soiled or dirty food, which is very easily done with a wooden shovel made on purpose or by a stiff broom. Roots For Farm Animals. If roots are stored in a pit in the field a high, dry place should be chosen. If the ground is clayey the roots should be placed on top of the ground. If it is gravelly and drainage is good a shallow pit about five feet wide and of necessary length may be shoveled out The roots should be carefully placed in a gable shaped pile about five feet wide and as long as convenient A thin layer of straw should then be laid over the pile and this covered with six to eight inches of earth. Another and thicker layer of straw and a final layer of earth will com: plete the work. Ventilators should be placed at intervals of ten or fifteen feet which should be closed when sweating has ceased. The pit should not be opened on warm days in winter. A ditch for drainage should be cut around the pit Roots stored in this way do not keep as well as when stored in a good cellar; therefore the; should be' fed out as early as possible. ?New York Cornell Experiment Station. Celery Stored In Cellars. Where celery Is stored in cellars the temperature should be kept low and plenty of ventilation maintained. The warmth and dampness of the ordinary cellar have a tendency to cause the celery to decay, but these conditions can frequently be overcome. Celery will readily absorb any odor that may be present in the atmosphere of the storage place, and care should be tak en to provide sanitary conditions, xne plants should have most of their roots attached, and a bed of moist sand in which to set them should be provided Apple Paring Machines. Paring machines are made for op erating either by hand or power. The more recent patterns have two or ever three forks for holding the applet while they are being pared. The at tendant puts an apple on one of the forks while one on another fork is bo Ing peeled.?H. P. Gould. i I A il Humor and Philosophy By DUNCAN M. SMITH 4 , ,J. PERT PARAGRAPHS. An eye to the main chance should I tee to it that a hand is kept on the main brace. Some people imagine they are great who are only conspicuous. Lots of people are eating frappes who would prefer pumpkin pie. Jin active slipper makes an obedient child. There is just so much need of saving the world as there are people who think it needs saving. Nothing aids digestion so agreeably as a good meal. , Some people get very angry with good cause, while others are able to dispense with the cause. It is too bad, but some of us are most busily engaged in acquiring painfully the things that we don't want The presidency isn't worried half so much as some near presidents are. People who do their duty obviously are such an intolerable nuisance to others who don't do theirs. Wanted to Know. "Don't you believe that woman should be emancipated?" asked a large female threateningly as she brought her fist down on the table. "From what?" asked the little man, first peering around cautiously to see if his wife was in sight Somewhat Egotistical. "She has beautiful eyes. They are so large." "I noticed the same thing In her escort too." "Beautiful eyes?" "Well, large and profuse I's, anyway." * * iy wf Footless Run. "Gets a run for I . his money." Il J^^Hk \ Putting Him Next. Oh, Aunt Jemima, What ; A sight! Was It A train wreck . ? * Or A fight? Or was The wight Run over By An automobile On The fly? Or Possibly U~ +,w,b Alight Helped by ' A stick Of Dynamite? No. It was nothing Of That sort. Alas. The market Caught Him short. And when He came Accounts To square He hadn't Any Margin there. And now He stands Outside the Jam, A sample Of N A Wall street lamb. Handsome Is, Etc. "Girls are pretty anyway," said the [ pretty girl conclusively. "So are puppies," returned the blase young man. "Not unless they keep still and don't tnik hack." returned the pretty girl. Has to Be. 1 "Why Is It that the bystander Is always innocent?" "He can't help it" "I don't understand." "He doesn't know enough to be any| thing else." Ought to Make It Good. "Did you get the right remedy?" "I guess so. The druggist said it was correct" "Was the name blown In the bottle?' J "No, but my money was." | The Sport 8poiled. > "I suppose autoing Is an old game to 1 you." 1 "No; I have Just had my machine a few weeks." ? "Pshaw I That's too bad. You have * missed all of the fun. The people have learned to dodge them now." gDENMAI It a riTv nc m ^ H VII I VI VI ft A RAILRO^ Served by Three Trunk Lines, Sea and Southern Railway. Magnifice joyed to All Points East and We the Very Heart of the Best Ag lina; Cotton, Corn, and Pots Truck Farming, Watermelons, 5>y^/ Growing Industries. Large i ? Machine Shoos and Mercanl ^ ?g?g ployment to Skilled and U (raj) tributing Point and Locati( it Has Special Advantage 8 <ji Miles from Savanah, j||j 55 Miles from Augusta, J jp^ The South Bound Land a (?J) of Savannah, Ga., have r< ket 350 Business and R< 5^) are selling upon easy ter apply to ?C. H. D< j||j President, . . . CURE "MAD DOGS" WITH SALT, Hold Them and Force it Down Their 1 Open Throats. i A large crowd held by the fascinat- a XI ing interest of danger, and at the AIL same time ready to retreat in panic, ? t watched a "mad dog" in east Sixty- ? ; - - t> i j y fourth street, between rant aim ^ Hotel Madison avenues, lateyesterdayafter- * and Third i noon. Finally the spectators were 2 Z June 18th. rewarded by witnessing a marvelous I; Z of the "cure" for whatever ailed theanimal. * ? A small fox terrier was led to a ? f m { chain by a well dressed woman. V William Wolf of No. 360 east Fifty- ? loflfl sixth street accompanied her. Sud- 3? 41111111 denly the dog began to run about *? Sulllva the woman's skirts and froth at the ? L?? mouth. Several times he darted to- r$f ward her, as though to bite her, but she picked him up by the chain and held him. Edmund Lysaght of No. 201 -east Sixth-third street grabbed the terrier by the scruff of the neck. J The captive tried to bite him, and w Ladj Lysaght found himself holding the (2, anin&l with no chance of safely let- 7 ting him go. A great crowd had j ^4. 0 nof0 dictanpp and m> ^II16rtiU ttt A OOXV WMWUXVr ? Frank Bernhardt, a truck driver. Jk prescribed common table salt as a Tj remedy. '*W A maid from a neighbbring house w supplied a small sack of table salt, Jt 1 and every time the dog tried to bark 7 a handful of salt was thrown into his ^ HAT mouth.. m 1 1 ^ 1 The dog\was fed several ounces of ? salt and befcame very sick. When he Y i recovered he trotted off peacefully at . his owner's heels. A veterinary said w ] that the terrier did not have the rab- J, ' bies but an old-fashioned dog stomacl\- J i ache, and that the salt was as good a W 1 remedy as could have been prescrib- 4 1 ed.?New York American. J, / Statement on Acreage. mar Memphis, Tenn., June 1.?At a *? if IF S meeting of the State presidents of Bam be the Farmers' JUducation ana uooper- m> i ative union, who began the sessions here to-day. the total acreage of cot- ^TTTTi ton planted, May 30, was estimated at 28,832,000 acres as compared with 31,311,000 acres in 1907 (government estimate). This estimate is comput- I lAff ed from reports received from all of I mMkM E the cotton growing States. I Wf^y F The reports show, the growing crop I WW Hi rronomiiv to he in an unsatisfactory | 6^'" J condition. Lands subject to over- ^ flow, it is shown, are among- the I m most productive and it is considered I Si that hundreds of thousands of bales I * G< have been lost to the planters. I ar According to the reports the sea- I son is on an average of 15 days late, I less of the area is chopped and work- B f?I ! ed to-day than was the case in 1907, B and weather conditions have retard- B TELEPHONI ed the growth of the plant. 1 "5? . ^ ==================^ ' RK, S C. | PPORTUNITIES > 1 ' kDCENTRE 8 board Air Line. Atlantic Coast Line ; j nt Service and Low Rates Are En-. 1 st, North and South. Situated in ^cultural Section of South Caro- )| itoes are Standard Crops, and , Poultry, and Fruit Raising are tSB^g Saw Mills, Oil Mills, Ice Plants, ? tile Establishments Give Em- (11^ Ptnskilled Labor. As a Dis- gjggj >n for Manufacturing Plants' ^ ' ^ es. It is :::::: : 51 Miles from Columbia^^Kp ^2 Miles from Charleston nd Improvement Company, ecentlv out upon the mar- ((Still esidence Lots, which they vps| ms. For plats and terms . (jgJI - . . . Savannah, Qa. |=i s gf sstigf sifsitsrt '* * < * * #? * ? ***" ** * SULLIVAN'S ISLAND} S. C. ? ANTIC BEACH HOTEL I OPENS JUNE 1, 190S W will be headquarters for relatives and friends of Second 9': egiments, N. G., S. C., who go into camp on the Island ffi Daily and nightly amusements will be special feature W^ggp el for military week. Secure your rooms. ?gf RATES $10* $12} and $15 PER WEEK; S* $2.50 and $3.00 PER DAY. APPLY TO X Jay Cohen, Jr., Manager 1 n's Island, South Carolina 9 ,i 1 '9 . ies we call your attention to our ? . cial Summer Sale ? >f new, stylish, up-to-date goods, at very low ^ ^ inces. uur stock oi ?^ rs AND FLOWERS t ias been replenished, and we have bargains ^ x> offer yon. Our line of Silks, Laces, Em- ? ? y,jjM jroideries, Collars, Gloves, Hosiery, Corsets, jT s the best to be found anywhere. We also f lave a full line of Parasols to suit all ages and w . ?} aurses. Our prices are the lowest ^ K. I. Shuck & Co. Ilpp rg, South Carolina. ^ ^ |.' y&"" ' ' '?3$ : HAVE IT!| q up-to-date drug store with a choice assort- *?->/.; ent, of Drugs, Patent Medicines, Paints, Oils, 8 ationery, Cut Glass. Combs, Brushes, Rubber 8 xxds, Cigars, Etc. We can serve you promptly ' 8 id at right prices. Give us a share of your trade ^ ver's Drug. Store | ;;|5 I 44 ? BAMBERG, 8. C. M?bb????? '. vV. -'- ?-" " ...- v^?a?3!0P$NfeS