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*'l i. ? ? Sjiummmts ?rj?rfownt. \v^Unanswerable.?Army officers in Washington tell how the cleverness of a,,newly appointed officer xm General Wood's staff once saved the newc,9rn,er from a severe arraignment. The general has always liked young men, but not when they were "fresh." Now he chanced to overhear the boyW. (." officer referred to say to a group of frfends: UfWood? Mighty fine fellow." The general joined the group amid profound silence. Turning to the lieutenant he said sternly: .Vfij-'I. think, sir, you might have said 'General Wood.'" . .."Why, sir," answered the youngster with' happy presence of mind, "did you ever near or General .pennies or General Julius Caesar?" Curtesy. ? Four old Scotchmen were seated around the tab^e in a Glasgow clubroom. It was in the wee sma' hours and Dougald looked across at Donald and said, in a thick, sleepy Voice: ' "Did ye notice what an awfu' peculiar expression there is on Jock's face?" "Aye," said Donald, "I notice that. He's' dead. Been deed these four is An hours. s .; ' "What? Dead! Why did ye no tell me?" '>Ah, no?no," said Donald. -"I'm Tto '^hat kind o' man to disturb a conveevial evening." ' '-v. , ^ _ s A Bit Too Severe.?"I have come said the angry man to the superintendent of the streetcar line, 4to g?t justice, sir. Yesterday, as my wife was getting off one of your cars thiel conductor stepped on her dress and tore a yard of frilling off the The superintendent remained cool. "Well, sir,1" he said, "I don't know that we - are to blame for that. What do ^oii expect us to do? Get her a new dress?" '"No, sir I do not intend to let you oft so easily as that," the other man replied gruffly. Kki brandished in his riiglit" hand a small piece of silk. "What I propose to have you do," he said",'"is to,match this silk." U-Xlrie Sergeant's Recipe.?Most army stories cannot be printed, but here is one .of the mild ones: A hungry 4.oughboy approached the grouchy iiiess sergeant long after mess was over and doubtfully asked how the qhan^ces were for a little something to-'eat. . The sergeant smiled upon him with cjfufte unprecedented favor and asked seriously: "How would you like a jam sandwich?" "Fine," said. the. doughboy, loosening his belt in anticipation. "Well, here's two good slices of bread. Jam 'em together." Preaching and Practice. ? "For .heaven's sake. Martha," the Rev. Dr. Preachley called to his busy wife: K%-of /->,!< come ana uihf uus ^ miui v?. of,my hearing1! " ' "Why, how cross you are," the wife and mother protested, hurrying to remove the offending infant. -Cross? Who wouldn't be cross?" waV-the peeved retort. "That brat keeps pulling at me to play with it, and" yelled when I only slapped its hands. How do you expect me to ever finish writing my sermon on "Suffer little children to come unto me'?" i i.. vToo Exact.?An American politician!'who at one time served his country in very high legislative place,, passed away, and a number of newspaper men were collaborating on an obituary notice. 'V^Vhat shall we say of him?" asked one. of the men. ^Oh, just put down that he was always faithful to his trust." "Yes," answered another of the group, "that's all light, but are you going to give the name of the trust?" Enough Said.?The farmer was met by .a seedy-looking individual, who called out: "Is that your pork on the road down there?" '"."Pork?" repeated the farmer. "What do you mean? There's a pig of mine there.".,,. ' tSOWOMT.n XtSTum xrwiw urnoh ' ..i... THE CIRCUS PARADE. "We are to lead the parade," said the members of the band, "and we ' will play fine mu?? sit' to make evte eryone' feel happy. . "They will be so glad that they jCZSWA are at the circus p and will say, yr*v?rTfi xU <1 wn?,?../v to nnt-h. t''" C'rCUS charmer tind the m/m [ eryone will say ^JK7 vV 'l?W (1Ueet' W(i are" r**1^ "Aud tlioy will "We Amuse." wonder how I can g w a 11 o w t li e sword," said the lady sword swallower. "Then we will coine," said the cam- ' els, "and we, will have fine looking shawls upon our backs. and humps: We are the Bactrian camels if nuy. one should want to know and there are probably many who want to know this." t'Then we will come," said the elephants, "and beautifully dressed ladies win rule upon us. "They will ride upon us too," said' the camels. "And we will niurcli in the parade," said the clowns, "and as we go about the . ring we will make funny jokes. We amuse the people and make them laugh. Last j\ear we had some visitors with us. There was a great tall man who had made pictures and a very short man who made pictures too. "That is, they drew funny pictures, and they knew that visiting us would help them to make still funnier pictures for we are so funny." "Ah, but we will bark anff shout, "'Bow-wow,'" the dogs said. "And we will wear fine ribbons on our collars and lobk very much dressed-up." - "We will march too," said the horses, "and after that we will run races and a man with a big rope will see If he can capture us all at one fling. "We pretend to lie very wild. That is to make the cliKus exciting, but we aren't really wild at all. We're gentle and kindly and friendly, but it is our nart to act wild so we do." . ,"\Ye fly abqut an<l come back to the lndy',s arm who trains us," said the pigeons. "It is true, she has two arms, and some of us will fly t,o one arm and the rest to the other arm. But we who are telling you about what we will do will fly to her right arm and so we only spoke of the lady's arm." ' "In the olden days," said one of the elephants, "the circus used to travel by road. They didn't come by trains arid my great grandfather told how he and his friends used to swim the small rivers when the rest of the circus was travelling over the bridges 'they came to, for if they had gone over the bridges, the bridges might have gone through with their great weight. "That is an interesting hit of family history." "When the circus is over the peopie" wiil come and look at all of us," said another elephant. "Yes," said one of the other camels, "they will all come and admire us." "They will see me," said the Nubian Lion, "with ray handsome big inane and my huge body." "And they will see me." said the "Ah," continued the tramp, "out there's a motorcar just been by." i-An Ingenious Thing.?Mrs. Mason, who had just had installed an electric cooking* stove, asked her maid, Norah what she thought of it. i, "To me, mum," said . Norah, "it seems like a great invintion. When you and Mr. Mason was away for over Sunday, mum, 1 burned it all the time, mum, and there seems to be pliaty of electricity still left!" i 1 To Make Them Pay.?Hacon?"My wife is working on a new kind of a slot-machine which she expects to make a lot of money out of." Egbert?"Really?" Racon?"Sure thing; it is to be at tached to a trout uooi\ ana wnen a 1'eJlow comes home late at night he "/ doesn't get in unless he puts in a $5 note."?Yonkers Statesman. ve ^ No Admission.?The senator was back home, looking after his political fences, and was asking the minister about some of his old acquaintances. 'How's old Mr. Jones?" he inquired. "Will .1 be likely to see him to-day?" "You'll never see Mr. Jones again," said the minister. "Mr. Jones has gone to heaven."?The Non-Partisan Pender (Minn.) Why the Editor Left Town.?Miss B. M. D. sang sweetly and effectively "Just as I am, Without One Plea."?i-'airmont West-Virginian. lSable Niger Antelope from Africa. "They will be told ' that I Jo not 1(1 II it l| IT] make a nice pet but am rather t J cross. Still I am > worth looking at. \Jtyr -hit even if T'w not \Jw rp\ much?'on being a , | t pet." ^ "T hey will ' * speak of my beau- ^rf/. i ty," said a beauti- , ful big spotted 'j h Bengal Tiger. h h / | "They will come Vi 'fr ( to see us," said PN 'At the Russian jf Brown Bear, "and |K .,Jff I will stan d U 11 ^ rrrikf IJ up on my hind "On My Hind legs and look at Legs." theiu out of the bars of my cage. Of course I will look at them with my eyes but I will look through (he bars Of my cage all the same."- * "And they will feed us peanuts," said the elephants, "and they will lnmrh as thev see us wave our heads. The peanut man will tell them that the elephants can he fed at this time, and then he will make money selling his peanuts and we will be fed." But it was time for the parade to start, so they followed the bund, and all the people who saw theui clapped their hands. One Way Out.?"Father, 1 need a new riding hal>it." "Can't afford it," he growled. "lint, father, what ;mi I to do without a riding habit?" "Get the walking Imhit."?Boston Transcript. The Time Limit.?'Miss Toots, will you marry me? 1 would gladly die for you," offered the wealthy, but aged suitor." "How soon?" queried that practical twentieth century maid. MURDER AND SUICIDE Grandmother Kills Self and Grandson Rather Than Be Separated. "When Mrs. Susannah Kish, 70. heard that her son, Frank, who lives in Chicago, wan preparing to sue for divorce and take unto himself a new wife it instantly flashed throifgh her mind that Frank would be sending for his 6-year-old son, Sammy, who had been making his home with her, relates a Detroit, Mich., dispatch. And she loved the youngster even dearer than she had ever loved any of her own children. She decided to garnish the last hours with her grandson with a round of pleasure. First, she arranged an elaborate party. The house was gaily decorated. There were numeroustoys, bright colored favors, gifts for each of Sammy's little guests, candy and a big white frosted cake. The children of the neighborhood were invited. At the party Mrs. Kish announced that Sammy was soon going "upon a long journey" and his playmates "must make merry now, for they would never see him again." Her statement was interpreted as meaning the child was preparing to join his father in Chicago. There was a general feeling of pity for the grandmother, whose very life seemed wrapped up in the boy. The day before the party she bought Sammy a new suit of clothes and herself a new dress. They were all black, but little Sammy didn't think anything of this/ The grandmother didn't let him wear the suit at the birthday party, for she said that was for his trip. For two days after the party no life was noticed about the Kish home. Neither Sammy nor his grandmother had been seen. Neighbors knocked repeatedly at the doors, but received no response. Becoming suspicious, they notified the police. When the latter broke in they found the house filled with gas. The grandmother was* lying on the bed' with her grandson tightly clasped in her arms. Both were dead. ''The crevices about the doors and windows had been carefully stuffed with rags. The new dress and suit had been carefully laid out?for their long journey. THEY TAKE THE PLEDGE Real Snakes Used to Cure Otd Liquor Heads. McKee's Rocks moral tone, long classed as low, is on the uplift, because Chief of Police Street has tacklrt'i Y\\rr Vtnn/?i/"?nn I "hootch chasers." Immune to every punishment, blandishment or promise of future welfare, they have succumbed to the chief's latest ruse of incarcerating: them in a "terror cell" Vith six big Mexican snakes of the i pine and bullhead varieties says a McKee's Rocks Pa., dispatch. Chief Street's' unusual experiment came only after he had exhausted every known method for curing perpetual drinkers. Reformers and sociologists were appealed to. Fines and jail sentences had little effect. nFo the chief, on the suggestion of a western friend, procured six Mexican pine and bullhead snakes. Although quite harmless they are terrifying in appearance, measuring six feet in length with the thickness of a man's arm. Whenever one of the old whiskyteers heeds "real persuasion" he is placed in the cell with the snakes. When awakened he sees his cellmates 1 j It Is Comi 2 S We Are Going to I 9 Weather Now and J die Dresses Will Be COME IN AND LE' J Our Organdies and Voilci ? made up early. ? FIGURED i In all of the best, patterns i son as high at $2.50 a yarc j 19 CTS., 45 CTS., 68 CTS 1 SOLID COLUJK A 9 In all the wanted shades? i 9 WHAT IS I 0 i) Than a nice White Voih ' goods tluit yon want?Pvi 5 25 GTS., 39 CTS., 49 5 Next we will show yo 9 WHITE OR ? Priced at 25 CTS, 9 Very select quality and bi 1 IMPORTED C j In Colors?Maize, Orchid A Nile and Copen?Special 1 l KIRKPATRK 3 Sells It For Less and ivariably "cuts lip some real didoes," to use the words of Chief Street. t A nicely scrolled "pledge," hanging on the door, bears the tremorous signature of several dozen "old-timers" who have spent the night in the "terror cell" and awakened there the next morning. GREEK PRINCE KILLED Brother of King .Con&tantine Loses Life in Battle. Prince Andreas, of Greeec, brother of 'King Constantine, has cfied from wounds received in fighting near Brusa, according to a Constantinople dispatch quoting' a Turkish announcement. The Turks also assert that General Vlachapalos in command of the Greek attack against the- Turkish nationalists on the Brusa front, has been killed in action. Prince Andreas of Greece was the third son of the late King George. He \vas horn in Athens on January 20, 1SS2, and served in the Greek army during the Balkan war in 1912. Following the flight of King Constantine from Greece in 1917, it was reported he aspired to the throne, hut this move was reported to have been1 blocked by M. Venizelos, then premier of Greece. REAL ESTATE AGENCY FOR SALE Fifty Acre Tract?Near New Zion church and school; three-room house and barn; lot of good saw timber* The J. W. Dobson Property?Corner of Congress and Madison streets. Good nine-room dwelling and store. Lot faces on Congress and Madison streets, with room for more buildings. Attractive bargain. Cottage on Wright Avenue?Five rooms and commodious sleeping porch, electric lights, water and bath; Lot 80 feet front. 280 feet back. Nine Room House?Between residence of C. F. Sherer and Carroll Bros.' Store. If you are looking.for a fine location and a bargain, see me quick. Five Room House?Off King's Mountain street, Yorkville. Lot 90x200 feet. Thirty Acres?One mile of Yorkville, on King's Mountain road. Tract of 142 Acres?Two miles of Clover. Has a first class neatly painted eight-room hous^, with good barn and outbuildings; also a well'finished four-room house with oiitbuildings. Entire place is good level, land with practically no waste. Will'' sell as a whole or divide so as to leave settlement developments on either tract. New four-room house?bjear Yorkville Graded chool. Residence Phono 111 and Office Phone 74. C. F. SHERER, Real Estate This Store IS HEADQUARTERS FOR FINE FURNITURE, MATTINGS, RUGS AND TAPESTRIES. WE CARRY A LARGE STOCK OF COOKING STOVES, RANGES AND HEATERS. Automobile Accessories, Gasoline and Oils. M. L. FORD & SONS Licensed Undertakers and Embalmers. Automobile Hearses. CLOVER, S. C. I ing? j o 1 L lave Some Warm $ e Voile and Organ- ? j : What You Want J r US SHOW YOU I 5 and get. those Dresses ? f VOILES 6 ? 5 that you paid last sea- J [ for?Arc here today at f 75 GTS., 98 CTS; Yd. ? IED VOILES J -Priced now at ' 49 CTS, Yard J 'RETTIER 2 ? e Dress? We have the ? ccd at CTS., 98 CTS. Yd. 2 u our jf GANDIES , 68 CTS., 98 CTS. Yd. ? .'antiful new patterns in V )RGANDIES i Vf I , Harding Blue, Grey, ?! .Meed at p $1:98 Yard ? j ;K-BELK CO. { Sells It For Less (f Following the return to .Athens of Constantine, Prince Andrews was up pointed a general in the Greek army and late last month was said to he in command of a division at the front. He was married to Princess Alice of Battenberg on October 7, 1903. LEAVES LARGE ESTATE Property of Late Cardinal Gibbons Valued at $100,000 The will of Cardinal Gibbons was filed in the Orphans' court in Baltimore this week, disposing" of a personal estate of about ?100,000. )u i^iaiiujj \j. i ?. \??u i aiuiiiii- I istrator, of the Baltimore Jiooe.se; I Refrigi | , YES, QUITE TRUE, | eariy to think about Rcf a but really it is not too e | one of these home neecs 5. summer. We can supply | we may not be able to d | that you look at our Rcl 5 now while tlie "getting i | You'll find our prices = V\*il 1 find that our Rcfrigi = 0. K. as to quality: Loo U REFRIGERATOR S| ICE BOXES?75 and | YORK EUR fa > NEW LOT OF CHOICE \ Wc hare a choice bin now?arrived a few day? for a jNTnlc or two come a exchange and give you ; MULES JAMES B j YOU NEED .THE DOC! s \ CALL NO. 65, CLOVER, ; OUR PRESCRIPTION DEPART,' J rharmacist. ! WE KEEP?Fresh Candles.nil tin I and WRITING MATERIA therexall. CI" I PE ; store i Prompt and Accurate Servic I OIL MILL PRODUC See lis for n good ex We liavc nice briglr OUR GINNERIES ARE THAN THEY HA I We can handle 125 bale charge is 60 CENTS per ROLLER MILLGrinds Wheat, Corn a Feed, Chicken Feed, I 11 ay, Flour "and Corn money. I DEALERS IN COAL ANI | YORKVILLE COTTO the Rev. Louis R. Stickney, rector of < the cathedral, and the Rev. Eugene I J. Connelly, chancellor of the diocese, is left the hulk of the late prelate's estate. Under a codicil drawn in November 1010, all the property owned by the cardinal in Virginia and West Virginia is bequeathed to Bishop Donis J. O'Conncll, of Richmond, Va. in a private memorandum left for the guidance of his executors, he designates the disposition of certain funds for Catholic educational purposes in the archdiocese. Personal legacies ranging from $3,000 to Bishop Carrigan, down to $100 for the servants of his household, also were spec I iried in the memorandum. erators , | it may seem to be a little | rigcrators aiid lee Boxes; 5 arly if you4 expect to buy E s'itics tli is year?for next ? ' you now?next summer ~ .0 so. Hence, we suggest = 'rigcrators and Ice Boxes 5 is good." E quite interesting and you E erators and lee oBx-cs are | k at once. ' ? ?25 to 100 lbs. capacity. . | 1100 lbs. eamcitv. = j. ? j SS5 NITURE CO J MULES? ncli of grilles at our barns ? ago. If you have a need nd see us. 'We will sell or , i fair deal. [(OTHERS H0RSES hi u.ay ,a iati n ^ UJ& !? ' \ and we will get one for you. * WENT is in el large of a Licensed ' . j time.? See us for STATIONERY \ LS, Magazines, Perfumery, etc. [ARMACY J- E. BRI80N, | ' Proprietor } :c CLOVER, S. C. ; r 1 TS I change of Meal for Seed. | t Hulls. ; . | , IN BETTER SHAPE J , VE EVER BEEN. f j is in 12 hours, and the | Hundred pounds of lint. | i .ml Oats. Sells Flour, Hog I ^ lorsc ami Mule Feed, Oats, S Meal. Try us and save 2 | ) ICE. | ( ? OIL COMPANY | | c OLIVER / CHILLED PLOWS" WE ARE OVERSTOCKED ON ONE HORSE AND NO. 10 OLIVER CHILLED PLOWS AND WE ARE GOING TO SELL THEM. IF YOU ARE IN THE MARKET FOR ONE OR MORE WE WILL SELL.YOU CHEAPER THAN THE OTHER FELLOW?NO MATTER WHAT HIS rmue. MAYBE. COME BEFORE THEY ALL GO?COME NOW. r Wc have Orange and Amber Cano Seed. CARROLL BR-OS. y . DOUBLE THE LIFE f t / Of Congoleum, Linoleum or Any Similar Floor Covering By Using? COS 10 LAC |f?|? THE I3E&T all use Varnisfi; For your Spring Cleaning use "jap-a-lacA .'>? We have a good line of both of the above and also a line of 1 HOUSE PAINTS Second to none. See lis for Pure Linseed Oil, Turpentine, White Lead and Colors. See us and get prices that will ^ surprise you. ' white wash and paint brushPEOPLES FURNITURE COMPANY -? .V ' \ R. C. Brockington . ' F. L. Hinnant W. M. Brown r??' Palmetto Monument to. YORK, -v- s.e.: / 20 CEMETERY STREET' J. G. SASSI'S OLD STANDNear Southern Depot'hnd Rose Hill ' Cemetery. . We make the location of our yafde plain so that ybu may know where to lind us when you start out to find the PALMETTO MONUMENT CO. / Come down East Liberty Street to Cemetery Street,, at the Southern Passenger Depot, and turn to the left?you will find us at the Corner of Rose Hill . . Cemetery. - N \ FINISHED MARBLE We hav$ just received a handsome 'line of Monuments, etc., in finished marble, and can supply what you want on very shori notice. We specialize in , the best Granite Work. PALMETTO MONUMENT.CO. "Honor Them With a Monument," PYRAMID PAINT SHOP BOCK HlfcMre? AUTO PAINTING? ' ; * / ; -f' ', ' ' ' ' SPRING?the season of thtfyear that makes you want to be out in the bpe'n as much as possible?is here, and now is the time to have that Automobile of your's painted.. Painting?rightly done ?will add much to its appearance and much to its life?}ve do it right. Scores of our customers will gladly testify to the quality and workmanship of our Auto Painting. ' ~ . Think it over. Come and see us. .The cost isn't so much and you'll be more than pleased with the .job we do. / AUTO TOPS? ? To be sure we make Auto Tops?real / . Tops?Tops that are as good; as the /' original builder made?better if you de- , si^-e a bettor top. See us about it. JAS. A.- JOHNSON, Prdp. PAINTING? i / .* . If you are thinking of do ing any painting this spring or sunnncv, either your house on the outside or inside work see us before you buy your paint. We:sell DEYOE?it is reeoghized as top-notch in covering and " lasting quality.' FLY SCREENS? .. Insure your comfort .this . summer by screening your residence. Our screens last. LOGAN LUMBER YARD DORSET. PS HARNESS AND SHOE ? HOSPITAL ? Corner Congress and Jeffersons Sts. v We wish to announce that! we have 1 deled to our force an expert shoe ' \ -Repair man? Capable of doing any Shoe Repair ,vork. Your repair work solicited, and t' you will let us know we will call for t in town. w e ask our farmer friends to bring us their harness for repairs. Prompt Service and Good Work and At Fair Prices. A. D. DORSETT, Prop. Seville enquirer Dno Year by mail ? $3.00 Six Months by Mail ? ? 1.75 !>ne Year by Carrier ? 3.50 Six Months by<Carrier ? 2.00 ifi/ Extra postage for delivery by Vllarge Letter Carrier, one cent a copy. ?apers delivered at the postoffice to be tailed for by subscriber, without extra :harge for postage. Three or more annual'subscriptions eturned and paid for at one time, $2.50 , ?ach by mail, or $3.00 if delivered by :arrier. . . . ... '