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r rue Lexington Dispatch. f Wednesday. November 20.1901. "Wise and Otherwise. Usually the newest thiDg in flannels is 3 baby. kThe virtues a woman boasts of she seldom possesses. ? - i r jl r i Street corners are me turmag H points in many lives. The man who invented work ought io have finished it. W g A man is not wholly bad if his dog has confidence in him. I Know One Sure Kemedj for an cbftinate cold. Its name is PyTsy-Balsaox. The hare may be cowardly, yet he usually dies gam?. Elevators lift many a discouraged mortal up in the world. BriL.ant falsehoods dazzle more eyes than gems of truth. Poets are born, but verse writers i grow of their own accord. t I Square dances come nanay wnen there isn't enough to go round. No respectable cat will lock at a king if there is a mouse in sight. Some girls marry in haste and reI pent in a cheap boarding house. ft Speaking of women and folding f beds, a man can shut the latter up. It is easier to protect ones self from an enemy than from a fool friend. a VirinVif mart in Wflnf'Pd for ! ?T Utii Ct 171 'i ?? , actual labor he doesn't have to pass a civil service examination. H. T. Mclutyre, St. Paut, Minn., who has been troubled with a disk ordered stomach, says, "ChamberI Iain's Stomach and Liver Tablets do J ine more good than anything I have ever taken." For sale by J. E. Kaufmann. When a married womaD sits for a v portrait her hnsband has to stand for it. The Texas steer is a pretty tougti customer, especially when you meet him in a cheap restaurant. A pretty girl who wears a perpetual smile may be jolly, but the monotony is something fierce. Deeds rather than words prove an old mane love for a youn? girl?especially deeds for real estate. If a girl omits pickels from the lunch she puts up when a young man escorts her to a picnic, his case is hopeless. More people spend their time in wonderiDg why they are not loved than in trying to make themselves lovable. Many a fool man who is always Bavins that life isn't worth liviner con linues to do business at the old stand just the same way. After reading an account of a man v who had fasted forty days, an Irishman said he would rather starve than fast for a living. Young man, if you have a sister love and cherish her: if you haven't then borrow some other fellow's sister. "Last winter an infant child of mine had croup in a violent form," says Elder John \v. Rogers, a Christian Evangelist, of Filly, Mo. "I gave ber a few doses of Chamberlain's Cough Remedy and in a short time all danger was past and tbe j child recovered." This remedy not : only cures croup, but when given as I soon as tbe first symptoms appear. | will prevent tbe attack. It contains ! no opium or other harmful substance | and may be given as confidently to a i baby as to an adult. For sale by J. E. Kaufmann. Two farmers of Hilleboro, Ga., i had a shooting match with pistols at a short range, with tbe result that one was killed and the other is dying. The man who marries for beauty only is like the buyer of cheap furni f ture?the varnish that caught hi? j eyes will not endure the fireside blaze. If the Baby is Cutting1 Teeth. Be sure and use that old and well ! tried remedy, Mrs. Winslow's Sooth? ing Syrup for children teething. It ! soothes the child, softens the gums, ailags all pain, cures wind colic and is ta[e best remedy for diarrhoea. Twenty-five cents a bottle, f It is the best of all. !' l MrtrdfWH. imrr^nvwr ttt f1 i Thousands Have Kidney Trouble and Don't Know it. Kow To Find Out. Fill a bottle cr common glass with your j water and let it stand twenty-four hours; a ' 0 j sediment or set- | irtS ' tling indicates an unhealthy concirn/( ?if ticn cf thc k?d- I \y/\ i \ '/ neys; " "'l s'.ains i 1 your liner, it is j 11^4 i I evidence of kid- { j?k \ / P tz< ney trou^'e: t0? i ^TuWy r ' -"3 frequent desire to P333 it cr pain in ?the baok is also convincing proof that the kidneys and bladder are cut of order. What to Do. There is comfort in the knowledge so cften expressed, that Dr. Kiimer's Swantpr>__. .i l.:? _ r..i* ; 11 ! 1 r\.UsA, uic giUi ftiuiic;y 1 c*?.cLy iuuuid ? wish in curing rheumatism, pain in the j : back, kidneys, liver, bladder and every part of the urinary passage. It corrects inability to hold water and scalding pain in passing it, or baa effects following use of liquor, wine or beer, and overcomes that unpleasant necessity of being compelled to go often during the day, and to get up many times during the night. The mild and the extraordinary effect of Swamp-Root is soon realized. It stands the highest for its wonderful cures of the most distressing cases. If you need a medicine you should have the best. Sold by druggists in 50c. and$l. sizes. You may have a sample bottle of this wonderful discovery ar.ci a book that teilsI more about it. both sent absolutely free by mail, address Dr. Kilmer &. Home of Swamp-Root. Co., Binghamton. N. Y. When writing mention reading this generous offer in this paper. England's storm. j < London, November 14?The loss ; of a life boat and seven of its crew j , near Yarmouth heads the list of to- j i day's wrecks by the continued gale. ! 1 The life boat was on its way to the j , rescue of a distressed vessel when it was struck by a great wave and capsized. The crew was imprisoned and i . only three of them succeeded in mak- [ ing their escape. Innumerable wrecks continue tc be ; reported on all coasts of the United | 1 Kingdotn, marking the storm as the j j most disastrous that has occurred in many years. Snow i3 tailing in many j 1 parts of the country. , The Xorweigan bark Erratic of Christian Sound has been wrecked in the vicinity of Saltburn, and eight J members of her crew have been ; drowD. An incomplete list of the \ persons who lo9t their lives by drown- j : iDg during the storm already aggregates over 160. j It Dazzles The "World. No Discovery in medicine has ever j created one quarter of the excitement j that has been caused bv Dr. KiDff's ! ; " ?-* I New Discovery for Consumption. J It's severest tests have been on hope- j less victims of Consumption, Pneu- j monia, Hemorrhage, Pleurisy and ' Bronchitis, thousands of whom it has restored to perfect health. For Coughs, Colds, Asthma, Croup, Hay Fever, Hoarseness and Whooping Cough it is the quickest, surest cure in the world. It is sold by J. E. j _ Kaufmann who guarantee satisfaction ; or refund money. Large bottles 50c : and $1 00. Trial bottles free. s To Release Aguii^aldo. Victoria, B. C., November 13 ? According to mail advices received j from Manila by the Empress of China Judge O'Xei), an American lawyer, is engaged in endeavoring to j secuie the relea-e of Aguinaldo by habeas corpus proceedings. Washington, November 18 ?While n 7 i the war department has not been ad- ! vised of the reported step to obtain the release of Aguinaldo from captivity, through writ of habeas corpus, j they were prepared for a move in ; that direction. A few weeks ago the j first application of this kiod was j made in the case of a military pi is- j enor, and as there was some indica- 1 tion of a disposition on the part of ' the Philippine commission to uphold . the right of habeas corpus in that case, the president was obliged to j cable instructions, both to the com- ; > ' mission and to Gen. Chaffee, the re- j ; suit of which was a practical denial ! ' of the writ. ; , As far as Aguinaldo is concerned j it is said that his captivity is only J nominal. The only evidence of it j consists in the appesrance by his side of an army officer when he walks about the town, for he is free to go j almost anywhere. Moreover, it is j s*id that this escort is perhaps necessary to p'otect Aguinaldo from ' attack, as he has been threatened by ! secret socities. Tfl CUFtf-S WHERE ALL ll'Sz FAILS. K| Jtej Best < nuuh Syrup. Tumcs <Ioo<i. Use Rsj m in tiiuo. >. ;a i,y iiniL'uiMs. i i?BMgGBngBMBEg? a^pawm?1^??? BOWSER'S THEORY. A BACK YARD EXPERIMENT IN THE j INTEREST OF SCIENCE. lie Tries to Kstal?Ilv!i n Vow Fact (.'oaccrr.iaff y.v.\?? Ccrrrnt j of the ICsrth. hut For t!u* l'roseiit | Disco vera X<r11* 2:* N c\v. roprr*'.*. z%:, by n. ] Mr. i'ov.TOr ?u!ii" hynie an Ti-ii:r ahoatl <T lime ? he other even he.:. ami he was ;*< -orarnl?y a I .ht-rvr wl.n was set to !iyry.i:itr :i 's ic in the ! :?? h varO. Wiva h.tis':*.;. the vat!' was S feet ionp loot and "J feet loop, and then Mr. Powswr stretch: 1 two olootrie wires the length of it p inn <le the < :v!s fast to pep:. Mrs. Hawser bad a curiosity* to know what "sut jieue is a max who disputes it." ill this meant, but she forbore to ask luostions. The cock's curiosity partook of trepidation. "I'll ask you. ma'am." she cautiously crhispered as she walked around on liptoe and glanced over her shouider, "if that is a ptrave they are dii'gin:^ our there?" "I don't think so," replied Mrs. Bowser. "Then is he borirp an oil well;"' "He can't he." "Is he digging for Captain Kidd's rolOV" "Hardlytbnt." "And it isn't a coal mine:" "No." "That's what scares i:k, ma'am. I've iliought c: this and thought of that and ?an't make it out at ail. and I do believe be'3 going to till the hole with water :md bring home a whale to play with during the winter." During dinner Mr. Bowser's face looked as profound as a pumpkin in i cornfield, and Mrs. Bowser with all tier chatter on neighborhood news failed to interest him. She bided her time, however, and when the proper moment arrived she carelessly queried: "Are you thinking of trying to grow fall and winter potatoes in that hole out there?" i lie looked at her in mingled contempt ami pity for a minute nrd then replied: | "Mrs. Bowse:, it is m>t exactly your i fault that ywi: were created a female, j and so I suppose I should not blame ! you for your lack <>(. brains. I can scarcely hope to make you understand me. but still 1 will make the attempt and at least satisfy your curiosity. Have yon ever heard that there is a j magnetic current passing through the j earth Y' "I?I believe I have." "Put you are not sure. While you hare been reading novels and ehewiug gum the magnetic current has been flashing along under your feet without a thought. In what direction does this current passV" "It dodges around, doesn't itV" vll "V//M' < w THE MAGNETIC (TRKKNT M'A> earth. but iie ' That's th^ woir.n:? ?sf it. of course. ! hiii I wiii l'(> on. Tiio accepted tlii'ory ! l?T scientists fur the Inst hundred years j is thai, this currant passes tliiouah !??> * J earth from nortii to south ?>r l'rom pole j to pole. In other words, the poles are sympathetic."' "Yes." "I say this theory is the accepted one j and has 1 evir been disputed; but, Mrs. ; Bowser. but'"? "Cut what:"' she asked. 'But here is a man who disputes it." ] lie continued as he tapped his breast ; and swelled up with importance. "Yes. j I have not only dared to do it. but I ? hone to mo\e that it is a false theory. Indeed 1 have every hope 1 li:tt I shall ! be able l<: prove to the world before j daylight tomorrow morning chat this i magnetic current passes ihronali the earth frun east to west instead." "And that's what tije lade and the wires are for';" "j'raetiy. if ?l:?re is a current from ea s: t<> the wires will eat eh and tudie.ih* i'. "iti.' Lev; r.;e yet; p-.j.-c t<? know?" "I shall be right there, Mrs. Dowser, right there, with a connecting wire in my hand, and I shall no: miss :he faimesr tremor." "1 don't see what you are to gain if yon do osicbi:-h a now theory," sh<salt: after awhile. "(.heat j-'ecf, woman. hat yon be brninlessl" he exclaimed. "If I ran establish the fact the. the magnetic currents nnes frem oast to west. 1*!! he the most famous man of the day. Mv ;i:>! f and d',: -ov t, v.*.'II no down Jo posterity ah,eg with ihe gr-cUost. J I xh.ail ia.vo honor. fnum. medals, riches. ;i crown of inureis. It's rise one chance of my life. the one groat ( chance. and i hope yon will say noth | iiiir to ilisc-ourare inc." "I- I won't." she said, "out if yon ore going to sit by that hole all night you ought to sucl; a lemon at intervals: or you will get hoarseness." "Ilcavcns above, but suck a lemcrs at such a supreme seieutilic 1110 men.?!" be gasped at her. "Woman, don't run this thing into burlesque. If the world heard that I established inv new theory while sucking a 3 cent lemon. I'd l>c driven to suicide in a month. No; there will be no lemons or catnip tea or bread and butter with sugar on it. You let me alone and don't worry." From that hour to 10 o'clock Mr. Bowser was nervous and uneasy, as all men are when on the point of making a gre^t discovery, lie read tip on magnetic currents in the encyclopedia, and he got down his map of the world and figured out the countries an east and west current must pass through. He was in quite a nervous state when he finally started for the back yard, and the ccok whispered to Mrs. Bowser; "The dear man looks as if he was going to the demht's to have three tnntJi iinilfwl and his ?a\V broke." Mr. Dowser carried a chair with him. | and when he had placed it he attached what he called his circuit wire to tlie main ones and sat down with the end coiled about Ids hand. IIo was pale, but he was dignihed. lie was nervous, hut he was determined. "You are sure yen won't have a lemon?" asked Mrs. Bowser, who had followed him oui, with the eat tagging on behind. lie ^ave her a look of contempt and motioned her to bo gone. "lie's like my brother Patrick," said the cook as Mrs. Bowser returned to' the house. "Yon can never get Patrick to suck a lemon when he don't j know who's going to dodge around and hit him with a brickbat." At a quarter past 10 Mr. Dowser sat stitfly in liis chair waiting for a magnetic tremor. At half past lie was expecting one every minute. At 11 lie felt sleepy and wondered if the current was not taking a night off. At midnight two i>olicemen and a citizen entered the yard by the alley gate, and Mrs. IJowser. who was keepiug vigil from an upper.window, went down and joined them. Mr. ftowsor sat in his chair with his chin on his breast and his hat. fallen off. and he was fast asleep. The magnetic current was playing lag through the earth, but lie heeded it net. "Is he watching for cats or rats, ma'am?" softly asked one of the officers. "No: it's an experiment," she an- j swered. "With a new sort of burglar alarm?" 1 "I think so." "Then I hope it will prove a sueccss. I guess we'd better let hint sleep on. V>?A.^, "V'X ; 1'1-A VI Nf; TAC TilUOl'fJH TI!i: il MilDKJ? iT .\<)T. tliouah hi* m:iy eat eh cold ill the tup of Lis head." es: art llim sleep. Then :i!i tiptoed a W:iV and left hill) to 1 he silent watches of tiie Juaht and tlie new east ais.'l west magnetic current. M. Quad___ ( ('onnul)inlhir.t. Mrs. niUus?.John. you outrlit not to be > > hard on the vountr 111:111 who Cutties To see liessie. Vull wore U j lover otioe yourseif. :im<1 my j recn'ii'-et'ori i< ihat you were some- I times :t very silly cue. .Mr. U.'iies ? SiijyI wa< ;iu Mint, j Maria: 1 was .-tu T I've found it 1 uu: .since. T<?e Sam" and V<-t? .. "1 i::i-i:V>;nnd." said tiie -alone trotter. wii-; had h??en :i 1 ?; ?;:??I for some t'iee. ;! :?! yen and .Mis.- Strong were | leij piiy ? ;.trri -.3 a siiort lime after lay d e.?r;..; - ? \ .t.? i. .<1 Mt* A 11111 * A ff f?r yo*:r ; :? {'!:.* \w wnv ;i:.: rii-.J i ii i??*."*--1"i11!:: i? I':vs.s. | i ! ! * at r Bee Hive Im a arrizrr orroKTrxiT x fflGH GRADE L^DERU ! 554- MAiN STRi !0:io case of Fine Siik Fleece Drawers, tho regular Sic" 1 ease of Woo! Fleece ilea!:! K-iter made, the >'1.00 ki i c?.ch; "i >v unv Ji.unu nw.fi crs. worth Sl.dO, during * ; 4 cases of the regular ~>0, GO ai Double and Single Krea.si out door Workingman's ( oO co!its, all colors. Wc discount to large purchas : Our Clothing Department is We carry in stock all the up to date garments of tl a So.00 bill and see what return in a nice suit or o >r. jprajshh. ? 1554 MAIN STREET | b September _r PharlestonJIOOR,!! MAXUFACT MILL WORK i8 Writs for Estimate. / CA7AI We Save You. 2?oney. Se Our Goods aro the Best.) on Bet Factory Save Mill aud Foud*: Ashley Iiiver and Cumming's Creek. 2] April 24?2 y. B. B. County Bonds. 1 Edgefield, November 14.?The peo- j pie of Edgefield, Wise and Pickens townships especially are more hope- j ful in reference to being relieved from the enforcement at once of the 28 mill tax to pay the railroad bonds now doe. Attorney General Bellin- j ger has given an opinion to the pub- ; lie stating that the county treasurer j has no right according to statutes to ' collect any tax enforced by a manda- j mus from the United States court. The most feasible plan to adopt now is to have one of our members of the legislature in January next to intro- ; duce an act authorizing the county J commissioners to put on the market j i a new set of bonds and let the pro- j ceede ot tne.Donas go towaru payug i the holders of the old bcndf. Great i care is needed in issuing new bonds j so that the payment of them can be i consummated in 20 or 30 years so as j to hit the tsxpayere, now burdened ' with heavy taxes, lightly. It is to be hoped that by the next maturity they will be paid and settled forever. - ... Blown to Atoms. j The old idea that the body somej times needs a powerful, drastic, j purgative pill has been exploded; for ' Dr. King's New Life Pills, which are j perfectly harmless, gently stimulate j liver and bowels to expel poisonous ! matter, cleanse the system and absoI lately cure Constipation and S:ck ! Headache. Oolv 23c, at J. F. j Ivaufmann's New Drug Store. Child Dida't J Columbia K&."ord, Nov. 11. j The Record is glad to report that j the little child who was accidentally j shot in the head last week in Brook- ! land is recovering. The reports were ; | that it had died and it was <juite I natural to believe the statement un- ' der the circumstances. Xe veitheless ' i the child pulled through and is on ! the high road to recovery. To Curs a Cold in One Day Take Laxative Bromo Ouinine Tablets. All druggists refund ;he money if it fails to cure. E. W. Grove's signature is on each box. 25c. VT,. V-,?7.r cUw 4-W4W n . Sb ?How beautifully L'iss Heavyweight (i:?LCts ! She iloe-n't eeem to touch the floor .sometimes! lie [whose feet are still suiiering from the last polku with hc-i;?Ste doesn't !?Punch. | n I K j Price Store, TO BUYEKS IN NEED OF ftlkilWKBH,! EET, COLUMBIA. Linod Shirts :ut(i >') kin-!. IKS cents, i Fnderwear, no nd. at <)2.l cents. Shins and Drawthis sale ?1.10. id 7"; cents Heavy :ed Fleece 1 ned ,'omfort. as a tlycr, make a liberal ers. second to none, high grade and o o ic season. Bring: we can give you in vercoat. i , Proprietox*, \ COLUMBIA, S. C. I j: i ASH AND^y^BEBfJo 'URERS OF m LUMBER. mUZ ( CYPKE5S AND at - YELLOW PINE laest. ( arc 0*ar Specialties. OfEce and 7ard.t: I to 47 Ash!ev Ave.. CHARLESTON. S. C. 2?nst Pay the Esremie. Washington Xjv. V>.?The com* missioner of internal reveuue today decided tlAt beer manufactured in the United States and shipped to the Philippines is subject to internal revenue tax This ruiing is a reversal of the one rendered by the commissioners several weeks ago. Ladies Can Wear Shoes one size smaller after using Allen's Foot-Ease, a powder to be shaken into the shoes. It makes tight or new shoes feel easy: gives instant ? . -11 ? T.?_ ?.l._ renei to corns ana oumons. xi a me greatest comfort discovery of the age. Cures and prevents swollen feet, blisters, callous and sore spots. Allen's Foot-Ease is a certain cure for sweating, hot, aching feet. At all i druggists and shoe stores, 25 cents. Trial package free by mail. Address I Allen S. Olmstead, Le Roy, X. Y. 20-ly. ! When vou come to town either for j * business or pleasure be sure to call at the Dispatch otlice and settle. THE 3 SPIRITTINE i Rl'MWIMS Endorsed by some of the Leading Medical Profession. Xe Quack or Patent Medicine. bat . NATURE'S PURE REMEDIES.i Admitted into the World Columbian Exposition ir. J>93. Spirittine I!al.;.au for Rheumatism, Colds, Lameness. Sprains, Sore Throat Use Spirittine Inluient tor Consumption, Consumptive Coughs, Catarrh, Asthma and La Grippe. Spirittine Ointment is indispensable in tha treatment of JSkin Discuses, Cure Itch, itching PiltS. In consequence of the astonishing success in removing diseases, its demand now comes not alone Jrorn this vicinity but from everywhexe in the United States and Europe. Wholesale and Retail by G. M. HARMAN. LexingJon. S. C. CAROLINA Mil Bill, COLUMBIA, S.C. STATE, CITY AND COUNTY DEPOSITORY Paid up Capital ... $200,000 Surplus Profits . - 00.000 Saving's IJepartment. Deposits o! S5.tX> and upwards received. Interest allowed at the rate ot 4 per cent, per annum. "ft*. A. CLARK, President. Wn.ic JoNits, Cashier. December 4?ly. Parties desiring the Home and Farm sont with the Dispatch must send 25 cent.*, cash in advance.