University of South Carolina Libraries
BOWSEF $ $ P/ IF Troublej- He Had 1 V Front ^Ttoop oj[Copyright. 1903. by C. B. Lewis.] Mn. HOWSKli loft for till' office th?? other morning at the usual tlino without a hint that ho would ho homo hoforo the illnnor hour, hut shortly beforo noon he reappeared carrying a pot of ronily mixoil paint anil a now brush. In reply to Mrs. Bowser? look of inquiry he explained: "When I went out this morning I noticed that the front steps needed painting. and heing it was a pleasant day I thought I'd cotne homo and do j tho Job." "I was going to speak nbout it in n dnv or two and ask you to got a pnintor," alio replied. "There is no call for a painter. I got this much paint and this brush for a dollar and a half, and that will bo nil the cost. A painter would have 1 I "r CAN DO TilK WORK IN TWO HOURS." charged :it least ?<>. I can ?lo the work i In two hours, and he would have dawdled around for three days." "But you sot out to varnish the front ' door two years ago and"? ^ "And I va r n I shod it nd- I ed painter toldjflfj^o Ullx in ca8tor oil. j nn<* didn't dry for a month, * was not my fault." "And last year you painted the front fence and"? "And I made a good Jolt of it too. EverylHHly brushed against it and 1 j hud three or four lights, but it's the i best looking fence on the street to- j nay. us no use your trying to dis- I .|jgp||CT I ' '* * FOUR TRAMPS WERE SITTING ON courage me. I can save $5 and liave a little play spell at the same time, and I'm going to do It. I'll show you a set of steps up which a king would bo proud to walk." That settled it. Half an hour later lie had got into an old suit of clothes rnd was ready for business. Ills first iivir u ?n IU 1 fit IIII il Nlgll OI "1'JlIIll" \ and stick it tip on flic gate, and ho had hardly begun on the stops when a |^r man came along and halted to say: "I do not exactly understand. I see no paint on tids gate. Is it that you Intend to paint it later on?" "Iton't yon see paint on these steps?" asked Mr. Howser as lie rose up. "I do, but the stops are not the gate. T am naturally of a eonliding, trusting disjiosition. sir, hut this is going too far ?too for. If you really intend to paint the gate I have nothing to say, hut if, your object is to deceive people, then, sir then let me say that you are an old scoundrel and pass on." Mr. Itowser got down to the gate as fast as lie could, hut the kicker had too much the start of him. fie took down the sign, however, and nailed It up on the steps, and after brushing nway for fifteen minutes he entered tho basement for a drink of water. He came out to find a knife grinder about to wring the front door bell, and after one look lie yelled: "t'iet out of this, you Infernal idiot! Didn't you see the sign and the paint*'" "You gotta no shears to sharpen; eh?" durrlpd the man as lie made new tracks in the fresh paint. Mr. Bowser grabbed for him, but ho tttistrd nnd dodged and made a bolt for the gate. The work then went on for half an 4>our without interruption, and it was a man and a dog who broke In upon ?he harmony. The Bowser cat had i the ? WINTER n Embellishing the His "Residence come out of doors for n sun bath. As tlio dog came trotting along lie espied lier and pushed open the gilte. The eat ran up the sleps and the dog afVu* her. and both slid and slipped and came rolling down again as Mr. llowsor rose up and eried out at the man leaning on the gate: "I'.y 1 bunder, but If you let that dog in here you ought to be rolled In the road!" "1 didn't let him in." replied the man, "but you needn't get huffy about it. lie hasn't hurt vimr ntil eat nnv " "Hut look at tin* front stops!"' "Ami look at my dog. It'll tako two hours to cot tin* paint oT him.** If a poliooman hadn't come saunterin;: along there would have l>-en a grapple, hut lie kicked the dog and ordered the owner to move on. and Mr. Itowser put in the next half hour pit-king hairs out of the paint and smoothing over the tracks. Then he went around the corner to the paint store to get a pinch of putty, and on his way back lie saw a man open the gate and walk up the steps and ring the bell. That man was marked for destruction. lie had rung for the second time, when he heard a great clatter and a hoarse breathing behind him, but before lie could turn around ho was yanked backward down the steps and mopped over the grass. lie was a man who was canvassing the street In the interest of a home for old eats and had been told that Mrs. Bowser wouldn't give less than $10, but lie didn't stop for the subscription. He wriggled loose while Mr. Bowser was trying to get a better hold, and he didn't stop to say goodby as lie fled. "Hum my hide if I don't dabble my hands in human gore," gasped Mr. Bowser as Mrs. Bowser came to the door to ask him not to kill any one. "I'm going to paint these steps If we have earthquakes, cyclones nnd/catjfT rlysms by the dozen, aurt" the next thing 011 legs tjiy.t, Valks up 'em has gid to diaf" - ? iff was dinner time before the work was done. Then a board was nailed ncross. the siirn "Paint" was hoisted Into a conspicuous place, aiul Mr. Bowser retired from the field with a feeling of complacency, lie changed his clothes, nte his dinner and nnuntered out for an evening view of his work. What he saw struck him dead in his tracks. The board had l?een removed and four tramps were sitting on the freshly painted steps in attitudes of deA ?, . . 0$ " -..v - ' -- > ? THE FRE81ILY PAINTED 0THP.&. Jection. As he appeared one of thenj arose and said: "I'lcase, kind sir, could you assist four worthy but unfortunate men who are on their way west to grow up with the country?" * Mr. Bowser couldn't. lie leaned up i against 1110 notise, and ins cigar wont | out and tin* night came down, and L when Mrs. Bowser and the cook finally coaxed Id in inside ho glared around him and his lips moved without uttering words, and it was plain that some awful shock had upset his mental system. M. QUAD. V Pleasant. "Why does that sentimental Miss Moody waste her time so with that worthless young drug clerk? ' "She considers him an ideal lover. She says it's so comforting to think if any one should hit -rfere with their love hew easy it would he for him to get the be t poison with which to end their sufferings." Philadelphia Press. A Mnltsr of Time. "My pre-.! lias been accepted," said the poet, "but I'm in some doubt about it. a t! inuga::hie only pays 011 publtcation." "Well, wh n is It published?' "It-cry e.n' ntii.tl!" Atlanta Constitution. InI nmprrHon. "I cm a fnid tlr t yeili ? man who 1? constantly trying to say bright t' I I i :i '-.Vlllc." Yes." nnnvi red Miss Cnj'enne, "and lie's afraid li" Isn't." - Washington Star. Xone tllKlirr. "Well." snid the gambler ns ho raised the pot on a royal flush. "1 am certainly currying ou things with a high hand." - -Cornell Widow. * '*ry- ., SELF INDUCED AILMENTS. The Folly of Noi-vlntc the Habit of Not Feeltnic Well. Fow people realize that their ailments are largely self induced, says O. 8. Marden in Success. They get Into n habit of not feeling well. If they get up In the morning with n alight headache 01 tome other trifling Indisposition, instead of trying to rise above this con dltlon they take a positive pleasure In expatiating upon their feelings to any one who will listen. Instead of combating the tendency to Illness by filling the lungs with pure, fresh nir they dose themselves with "headache tablets" ot some other patent specific warranted to cure whatever 111 they think they are sufTerlng from. They begin to pity themselves nnd try to attract pity ami sympathy from others. Unconsciously by detailing nnd dwelling upon tbelt symptoms they re-enforce the first simple suggestions of illness by a whole army of thoughts nnd fears nnd Images of disease until they are unfitted to dc a day's work in their homes or oflleos. There Is greater danger that young I girls who are delicnte while growing up and lounge around the house nnd lie down whenever they feel,the least bit out of sorts will form a habit of invalidism when they reach maturity. IIow often do we see such girls "brace up" at once when anything happens which Interests or excites them! An Invitation to a reception or n ball or any other pleasant social function acts like a thnic. For the time being an in stantaneous cure Is effected. They arc ns well as anybody until after the enfrvrfn Inntatif Indulgent mothers are frequently to blame for this physical and mental laziness. for It Is nothing more, on the part of their daughters. A lounge or sofa is a positive curse In many a home, because It Is such n temptation to lie down and succumb to trifling suggestions of illness or the least Indisposition. A habit of giving in whenever you "don't feel like it" Is fatal to all achievement and ruinous to self discipline, self poise and nobility and dignity of bearing. THE AURORA BOREALIS. A Spectacle Thnt Is MnarnlAcent In Itn ImiirFMlrrnriK. It wa* a trifle past the afterglow o' sunso^; and the sea was a d-^ep rich Purple, with long flowing swells. The sky. a line light turquoise blue at horizon. gradually deepened into a rich cobalt. In wldcli a few stars twinkled. A majority of the men were absorbed In various occupations below when a call of enthusiasm brought all up on deck. At a point low on the southwest horizon a faint film had arisen, which quickly, silently assumed the form of a curtain, waving and mounting upward In two stately columns past a group ol finely shapqd clrrostratns. In a few pcconds it was across the zenith, displaying beautiful pale yellows, greens and delicate pink and blue lights, witli edgings at Intervals of faint purple and red. The columns descended rapidly In ever varying spirals of jierapectivo until the avant garde was lost behind the far northwest horizon. We were altout off the Danish i>ort ol Godthaab, Greenland, a sufficiently southern latitude at this season for the alternation of day and night, and as tli? heavens darkened the stars shon? wltli Increasing brightness through tl>U great shimmering veil of light. The lienvens and the sea grew darkei and darker, and the aurora hrigbtei and brighter In lightning changes oi form and color, with the green and yol low and blue rays predominating and the delicate sheen from the aurora'* light writhing In fiery serpent form* over the face of the moving waters What lmpresslveness, what magnlflcenec! It held the soul as In a spell There was not much taIking. Splendid as it was, I afterward witnessed auro ras which produced a deeper impres slon, due doubtless to the presence of the long night of the far north.?Cen tury. Arizona Snnnhlne. To one who has been there, says Caspar W. fjodgson in Sunset Magazine, the name Arlzopa, first of ull, suggests sunshine and plenty pf It. Nowhere or the globe is sunshine more nhundaqt, more appreciated or more harmless. Indeed, a sunstroke has never been recorded In this territory. Though ai| good Arlzonians have crossed the ffassnyampa river, which not, According to tradition, divests one of the power to tell the truth, I believe their records are accurate as to sunstroke. The explanation is found In the fact that beat Is not so much a matter of thermometer ns of humidity. The dry, hot air of the Arizona desert Is Invigorating to the initiated. One can learn to love the desert. There the sunrises and sunsets are Intensely beauti* ful and nowhere ou earth richer In color. This Is sometimes called Sunset Land. It might also be called Land of Sunrise.?Sunset Magazine. Retraction. "Look here, Mr. Editor," exc!alme<] an Irate caller, "you referred to me yes terdny as a reformed drunkard. Yov must apologize or I'll sue your papei for libel." "Very well, sir," replied the editor "I'll retrnct the statement cheerfully I'll say you haven't reformed." Their (Tinner. Jasper?Young Scadsby has enough Why doesn't he keep out of bnslnesi and give others a chance? Jumpuppe?But It Is by going Intc business that rich young men like hlro give smart young men a chance tc make money.?Life. Flo Wonder. She?My pnrrot saya some nwfollj clever things. He?And who taught It to talk? She?Ob, I did. > T-i:_ ^ ^a>??, iFARMORCHARD^j ^^TR'GG; I i It takes nature n hundred years to i , produce n tree which a man with a sharp ax can destroy in fifteen minutes. The wise cook will hake the crust for ' 'nor lemon ami custard pics before slie < . ' makes the plo; then tbe bottom crust won't look ami taste like balf cooked , macaroni. i Tlie robin builds a pood, Inrpe, substantial nest and could seemingly care , for six or eight young birds, but we have never found a robin's nest with , over four eggs In It and usually only three. Some women are so set in their way i that they will not allow modern con- < venienccs which would ease their 1 J household labors to be brought Into the house, preferring to do their work In < the hard old way. It will cost about $1 to give the home farm a name of its own and have a batch of note heads and envelopes printed with the name of the farm and its owner on them. It Is a question If $1 can he spent to better advantage. We took up some white cedar posts recently which bad been set only six years and found tliem dooayod to tho 1 l>olnt of wortblessness. A willow post will Inst four years and be grown for 3 cents, while the cedar post costs 14 cents. Tbe farm separator is not only an economic blessing, but if tbe old motto, "Cleanliness Is next to godliness," Is true It performs a theological mission as well. The dirt which will be taken from the milk Is dirt which you do not know Is there. Where n farmer of standing and ln? tluenee Is wheedled by some swindler or fakir for a consideration to furnlsli the prestige of his name to rope his , neighbors Into n scheme the sooner he , moves from that community the better, L for his neighbors will never forgive and never forget. , Not one country sclioolhouso In ten Is kept up as it should be. While It may ; be all right inside, tbe exterior sur. rouudlngs are enough to make a child , hate to go to school, when If the direct , or mid tlio patrons would get up a little i enthusiasm and patriotism it might bo > made a pretty and Inviting place. Itocognlxlng the Hot tliot locality and soil have much to do with the e*? ; cellence of any gkx-ti variety of strawberry, we say that with us the Unndy I gives us the l>est flavored berries, the i latest berries and the largest ones, bnt i not the largest yield. From our point of view It seems like a sin to sell Gnndy berries so long as a man can stand , it to sit up nights and ent them. I The men who held over the onion crop or bought stocks last fall for the ? expected better spring prices have been most grievously disappointed this year. There was during April a perfect glut of this esculent on the market, and the prices were such as to bring tears to the eyes of the owners. In fact, hun> dreds of thousands of bushels were 1 dumped to get rid of them. A man takes chances in holding this crop over. During IJie snowy and wintry week the last fit ApriJ we passed on our way U) work every morning the nests of lit'# robins anil wondered why these birds did not have sense enough tP Pitt off their courting and family cares until later In the season when there . .would have been more pleasure and fun In the business. These birds reminded us very much of those young fools of our own race who get married on wliat they think Is love aud $2.73. Quite n little Is being written about the agricultural possibilities of Alaska. It is said that wheat, barley, rye and 1 ninny kinds of garden stuff are being very successfully raised well up toward the arctic circle and that there are Immense summer ranges of good grass I land for stock. Still, we hardly look to see settlers making n rnce for that seci tlon to take up homesteads Just yet. Nine months winter is too much even If the summer days are twenty hours . long. The difference between Just common things nnOthe best tilings Is well Illustrated in this Item from Florida: The , strawberry growers of the common l fruit during April were getting $4.30 per crate for their berries. One grow er of tiro Klondike berry, n very supoi rlor variety, could not All the demand I I for the nmdiK-t nf 1<I? iwnnin patch at $11.25 pel crntc. There in always sure to ho enough of the cheap and common things produced to supply ' the demand for such things and very often too much, while the very best products for which rich people will pay 1 fancy prices are almost always short. HnthonyI 0 :By TEMTLE HA.ILEV i O '.'opuritfhl. 190l*i by T. C.'JfeCkire O The Misses Ilildreth never spoke of \ Anthony's pedigree. There was a cer- ; tain flavor of the stables about the word whleli offended their nice taste. I "His ancestor was Antonio I.," Miss Anne would say proudly. "The blue ribbon winner at the bench shows." ' Anthony had never won a blue rib- ! bon. In fact, he had not been entered. Charles, the butler, had advised against ' It. "He'd never stand It, nia'nm, his nerves are that shaky," he had said to Miss An??nlltir? But when lie took Anthony for n walk he met Tnm the trainer. "What cud lie git with tlint nose?" he had asked disdainfully, and Tnm had nodded wisely. 1 "But, there, I wouldn't toll the old ladles that there wasn't any chance," Charles had said. For the world of the Misses lllldretb revolved nroutul Anthony, and they fought off the monotony of their gray lives by an absorbing devotion to the little Skye with the banged lialr. One inoruing In front of the brown* stone Ilildreth mansion stood a modest cab, while before an upstart yellow brick apartment house across the way waited a victoria, with a crest on the door and cockades on the hats of coachman and footiuan. Charles helped Miss Angcllne Into the cab. She was going lo visit a cousin at Newport. 8he embraced Miss Anne and kissed Anthony on the tip of his unnrlstocratlc nose. "Take care of hlni, Anne," she said ns she was driven away. As Miss Anne turned to go in the bouse there swept Into the victoria opposite nil individual?a lady, the unthinking might have called her. But in spite of the Imrrowcd crest and stolen cockades, Miss Anne knew that nowhere in the blue book of New Tork was there the name of a person who wore a ring on her thumb. The fat, red face of the person peered out eagerly. "That's a darlln* dog," she said. Then the good nntured creature bowed effusively to Miss Anne, but Miss Anne looked calmly over her head. iiu ih tunc person i" sne asked Charles. Cliarles did not know, and Miss Anne, with n shrug of her sloping shoulders, trailed up the stairway. All that day Miss Anne and Anthony snt by the window In an upper front room. Miss Anne embroidered and Anthony lounged on his white covered table and was bored to the point of extinction. Outside the sun shone and the wind blew with ullmiug freshness. Within all was darkness and quiet and Inaction. And Anthony was young! What rebellious plans raged in his bosom will never be known, but that night the Illldretli mansion was the scene of a tragedy. llodtlme came, and Miss Anne, with her soft, gray hair in decorous curl papers, laid hersojf down in the stillness of tho big rooip. Anthony's basket was in a dressing closet close adjoining. For hours everything was very, very still. Miss Anne slept soundly, with her little, soft, old face 011 her little, soft, old hand, and dreamed the dreams that come to such sweet snlnts. "Anno! Anne!" Wide awake In a moment, Miss Anne groped for the matches, and ut once a faint glow showed the wonder In her old fnce. "Who called?" She slipped out of bod and went to tlio floor fri?i% li?ll mm?u ?? ?. ?..mi tio ovim n liu blackness. She listened?enly the far atvny hum of downtown noises. In the ominous stillness came the thought, Why hud not Anthony waked? 81ic pushed the door of the closet open and listened. Hut no gurgle of contented doggish sleep came forth. Anthony was gone! For a moment the little lady stood dazed. Then she ran through her room to the hall and down the stairway. As she reached the bottom a square of grayls)) white light faced MeFfront poor >yn? ppei)l Miss Anne's nervous fingers playcp across the buttons on tho walj, app lights flared up ull over the house. Then the bell connected with Charles' room whirred In the distance, and presently Charles came down in a limited costume of slippers aud long coat "Authony's gone," said Miss Anne, and she wept. Charles examined the door. "That Mary came in last. It's her careless ncss," be declared. There was no more sleep for the household that ulglit. Only a weary vigil, ami all the next day Miss Anas wandered from window to window until ut last she crept to the door to welcome her sister, and the slender little women fell on each other's necks. "I woke In the middle of the night," sobbed Miss Angellne, "and called you." "( lieard," said Miss Anne solemnly, "but It was toe late." Charles looked over the heads of the little ladles at Mary, the housemaid. Then he winked and tapped his foredead significantly. In the ghostly stillness of the old parlor the tale was all told, and the two lonely little women sat down to face the loss of the one Interest In their barren lives. But meanwhile?Anthony ? By morning he was miles away from the brownstone front The days went > on, and gradually the glory of his yellow white float departed, AX times hs 1 ?n?M? ??wmmmr ft?* went hungry,, and his round sides bo- -v came mere hollows, but In his eyes was the sparkle of a care free spirit. Back of him was the dim room with Its confining white covered table, ahead of him sunshine and freedom. But dark days came when he was driven, lnmc and thirsty, from place to place, and one morning the light went out of his eyes, and he lay on a path in the park, his ears alert for the sound of ' menacing footsteps. All at once there came down the road n Victoria. In It was the Isdy with the red face, who motioned the driver to stop. "There's that dnrlin' dog." She held out nn open box of biscuits. "Come, doggie," she pleaded. And the prodigal, tired at last of the husks, trotted forward. The* footman lifted him In, and he sat with his dirty paws on the fawn cushions and ate of the fatted calf. When the carriage reached the familiar street the footman was ordered to hold Anthony tightly. "It would kill them sweet old darlln's to see him so dirty," said the kind hearted person. So the small dog was f-arrled Into the gorgeous npnrtment and scrubbed and perfumed and decorated with a distracting pink bow. Then the red faced lndy hied herself to the brownstone front. Charles took her card up. -J.lie person irom over there," lie Bdiil discreetly. The backs of the two little ladies stiffened. Charles hesitated. "She said she had some news." The eyes of the old Indies centered with one accord on n black draped basket on a white draped table. "Anthony!" they exclaimed and fluttered downstairs. When they reached the drawing room, however, nnd the vulgar nwfulnoss of the^fcrson was revealed, they itlffcncd again. But the red faced lndy swept forward nnd put lnitli of her fnt hands on Miss Anne's protesting, patrician shoulders. "I've found your darlin' dog," she said. What was n thumb ring or distinctions of caste at such a moment? The frail blue veined hnuds of the little women clasped the pudgy digits of the red faced lady, nnd their well bred voices were almost shrill ns they asked their breathless questions. Presently Charles was sent across the street to meet halfway the cockaded footman, nnd between them they brought in a perfumed and prodigal canine, who barked excitedly nnd licked the faces of the old ladies as they hung over him. At Inst Miss Anne sank down on a sofn, her cheeks flushed, her eyes bright, her gray hair flying about her ears. "<?et him a chop, Charles," she commanded. The red faced lady Interposed. "He's J stuffed already," she said Inelegantly. The little Indies shuddered. "He ought to get out more," advised tne portion. "You let me take him. I'm that lonesome sometimes that It seems n? If I couldn't stand It." In her voice was all the wistful longing of the once busy woman to whom wealth has brought unwelcome leisure. Before the eyes of the little ladles flashed a vision of Anthony In the victoria beside the vulgar, red faced lady. But with their other line qualities they possessed the gentle ^>ne of gratitude, and without apparent hesitation Miss Anne responded: "We shall be glad if you will take him." Then Miss Angellnc made another effort: "My sister and I will give ourselves the pleasure of calling on you soon," she said. The face of the person shone with delight, for a calling acquaintance with the IIIldreth8 was a consummation to he desired. But that night when Anthony was snoring In his basket Miss Annie bent over him and sniffed: "Musk!" she said, with a shiver of disgust. "And a pink bow," quavered Miss Angel Inc. They opened their windows, and the fresh night nlr blew In, Then they crept Into ImkI to listen blissfully to the deep drawn breaths that Issued from the depths of the little closet. Canine Conrle?y. "Dogs have their captains and commanders In the chase, and they follow their leaders In a way that shames the prncticeo pf men af times," ?al(l tfop man who Is fond of the hunt. I have often thought that man could profit a great deal by going to the idog for examples of rirtuous conduct, and I'm still Inclined to believe that his civic virtues would be strengthened somewhat by a closer observation of the good there is In the dog. 'Going to the dogs' Is used In reproach. Living as some men live Is Infinitely worse. Some men have all the dog's faults without showing any of the dog's virtues. But I was thinking of the captains and commanders In the chase. Hogs pay each other fine courtesy If they are good dogs and well tralued. The dog who would ran ahead of the dog who Is the accepted and acknowledged leader of the pack or who would show him the discourtesy of crossing the line of pursuit ahead of him would be disgraced, damned and shunned by lta fellows. The leader Is to be followed. Do? h*. hind him may be fleeter of foot. But he ! the leader, and that settlea It. And, my, how sensltlro some of these old dog leaders are! How jealous they are of their rights! I hare seen them quit the chase because some green member of the pack crowded in ahead of them. They would simply quit the ^ trail, get in behind their master, and ^ that would be the end of their frolicking that day. Hogs are great fellows when you come to know them."?New Orleans Times-Democrat.