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LOTS WERE M S FOR A MAN TO EAT. TRAGEDY AMONG SHIP WRECKED SAILORS. ONE OP THREE SACRIFICED. Special to The State. Charleston, Sept. 2-Shipwreck, cannibalism and ravieg lunacy form the fabric of a harrowing tale of the sea brought to Charleston today by Capt. Robert Milburn of the British steamship Woodruff, boona here from Himburg. * The story of tbe terrible suffering was rendered all the more thrilling by the presence of two of the actors in the horrible tragedy They are Maurice Andersen and Goodmund Thomassen, survivors of the crew of the Norwegian bark Drot, which sailed from Pascagoula for Baenos Ayres on Aug 3. The men were picked up from a raft by the Woodruff 250 miles south of Charleston on last Thursday, 31st ult. They were in a condition worse than death, and they were but a lit tle, if any, better when brought up to the city on the towboat Waban this morning from the quarantine station and sent to the city hospital Andersen is a raving maniac, with but little chance of ever becoming a 8&ne man, while Thomassen is so weak and exhausted that it will be a marvel if he regains strength and recovers his health. Andersen is a Swede Thomassen bails from Stevanger, Norway. The story of the shipwreck and the suffering of the men was obtained from the survivors by Capt. Milburn in moments, which were few, when the men could be gotten to talk rationally The Swede can speak but little English, and the Norwegian stiH lesa. The story that was told is probably the worst of the kind that bas ever been unfolded by the actors themselves to people of Charleston. Stories of the kind are found often in fiction, but seldom in reality, and probably never before have been told to a Charleston public direct. THE SHIPWRECK. ) The Drot sailed from Pascagoula with a lumber cargo for Buenos Ayres on Aug 3 last. Her crew consisted of a master, whose name is believed to have been Seren son . and a crew of 15 men The Drot en countered the hurricane of several weeks ago and was carried some what out of ber course. The storm increased in fury and obtained its greatest height on Aug 15. The master was swept overboard und the mate, whose name is not known, succeeded in command of the vessel. The Drot was then off the coast of Florida, but the exact bearings are not known Things became worse, and finaliy when the vessel had been well stripped and it was certain that she was going to pieces, it was de termined to make a raft of the bark's deck and trust to being picked up by a passing vessel The raft was cut and the mate and seven men boarded it What became of the rest of the crew is not known, but it is presum ed that they were swept overboard and drowned, or perhaps killed in the launching of the raft THE RAFT PARTS. The raft had not besn io the water many hours before ihe fury of the wiud and water had its effect and the float parted. Oa'oae piece were tbe mate and a seamen, while the remaining six were on the other piece of thc raft. The two rafts became separated and seither party knew the fate cf the other. Anderses aod Thomassen were of the rafe wbiob bore the six men. The storm abated io its fury aod fia ally eeased entirely. When the sun shooe a few days later the seamen appreciated their helplessness of the condition more than e?er. A flag staff improvised of a man's shirt was hoisted as a s'goai of j distress, bat ttje signal fisted IQ the | Metz2f hoseen by passing vessels. Hunger and thirst began to tell. The men were wi.hout a particle of food, . aod the several days' lack of food was cow appreciated ali the more because the excitement attendiog the storm was over. There was plenty of water, bat it was sal;. The men endeavored to driok it. They were getting desperate. To make the situation all the more hor rible, man-eating sharks put io their appearance aod they swam all about the raft, hungry for the prey The situation became worse than had been thought of dering the first hours of the life upon the raft. Man must be fed As ravenous as were tbe sharks, the seo grew to be more so, and finally it was resolved that ooe should give him self to be eaten by his companions. THE LOT DRAWN. It was decided to draw lots. It was a eas of ooe sacrifice or six sacrifices aod the lot was drawn. It fell co a young Ger mao. He was a cheerful victim. He was frail and s ai ali, but bis life's blood was worth having, and OQ tbs deck of the raft his veins were opened aod his companions sucked his blood Every man took bis place and drank of the yoong German's blood. The day that the lot was drawn coold OOt be learned. The body was carried 00 the raft for several days. Three of the seamen lost their minds aod overboard they jumped to feed the sharks. The body of the yoong Ger man W19 i*:0 ' rows ovhoard. , I There were DOW left hui two men, Andersen and Thomasssn. Thursday Cap . Milibarn saw the craft and resoued the survivors and brought them to Charleston. He reached quarantine this morning, and as the vessel was stopped for inspection the towboat Waban took the two men aboard and brought them np to the oity. An ambulance met bern and they were sent to the city hospital, where, accord ing to late reports, they were resting as quietly as could be expected. The men are in a very oritieal coodition,. as is to be expected from their 19 days of sufferiog OD the water, each days's suffering being worse than the day previous. The meo are io good hands, and will be given proper attention HIS FLESH BITTEN. Thomassen's breast, shoulders and face are badly bitten, chunks of flesh having been taken out He accuses Andersen of having done it. Reports received from Philadelphia state that the mate, who was oo the other raft, committed suicide daring the s term, but his comrade was picked up oo the 20:h of August by the German steamer Catania and carried to Philadelphia. He is also under treat ment. Reports of the wreck was made to Mr. C. 0. Witte, consul for Norway and Sweden, aod he took charge of the case and bad the men sent to tbe hospital. He has communicated tbe matter to the governments he represents and will act oo their instructions. Rev. Dr. Wm. M. Grier Dies at Due West. Special to The State. Due West. Sept. 3-D.-. W. M. Grier died of apoplexy at 3 o'clock this afternoon. The burial will be at 5 o'clock c n Monday. College presidents E.od prominent Associate Reformed Presbyterians have been invited to attend. Dr. Grier preached at Bethlehem, three mites from town, in the forenoon, aod was strickec dowo on reaching his bom*, dyiog io 40 minutes. Yellow Fever in New Orleans. Mobile, Ala , Sept 1.-Owing to the reported death by yellow fever io New Orleans aod two other cases declared there, Mobile County authorities pro claimed tonight a quarantine against all persons, baggage and freight from New Orleans entering Mobile County. Tbe mayor issued a proclamation of quarantine also against persons, bag gage and freight from New Orleans under such restrictions as are made by the board of health. The night train from New Orleans due at 12 10 o'clock tonight was pro hibited from discharging New Orleans passengers or baggage here. A detention camp will be established tomorrow. Quarantine is also pro claimed against New Orleans. Jacksonville, Fla , September 1. Communication with Key West by the rest of he world has been cut off by the orders of Dr. J. P. Porter, execu tive oifioer of the Florida State board of health, on acoount of two deaths and several cases which have been diagnosed as yellow fever. The order was issued Thursday evening by Dr. Porter on the report of the existence of the dis ease in Key West from Dr. Chas. B. Sweeting, agent of the board at Key West and sanitary "^spector of the port. Dr Porter, who ieft Key West one week ago ou a brief vacation, was reported to in Virginia and left imme diately for Florida, wiriog his orders to quarantine the island oity. He will reach this city at noon tomorrow and will immediately leave for the South, arriving at Key West OD Sunday afteroooo Meantime oo one will be allowed to have the island until he shall arrive. -Ma *- - * mt 11 War in Transvaal Inevitable. Loodoo, Sept. 4-The Morning Post publishes the following dispatch from its special correspondent now io New Castle, Natal : "I left Johannes burg OD ascertaining that it was the intention of the government to arrest every one who bad takes a leading part inj advocating the claims of the Out landers. There were a hundred war rants out. ft was an exciting journey. Boer policemen twice boarded the traio. At every station I saw truoks loaded with commissariat stores and ammunition ready to start. The Boers deoiare their intention soon to rush the Natal border. The chief officials at Pretoria consider war unavoidable and they have prepared to strike before the British are ready. "The following gentlemen escaped with me: Mes3rs Mooeypeooy, Hull, Hosken, Niven, Quinn, Orr, Ferguson and Carrie." The Daily Telegraph correspondent also considers war inevitable. There's always hope while there's One Min ute Cough Cure. "An attack of pneumonia left my longa in bad shape and I was near the first stages of consumption. One Minute Cough Cure completely cured me," writes Heleo McHenry, Bismark, N. D. Gires in stant relief.-Hughson-Ligoa Co. For wounds, burns, scalds, eores, skin dis eases aod all irritation ruptions, Lotbing so soothing and bealing as DeWitt's Witch Hazel Salve. Mrs. Emma Bolles, Matron Englewood Nursery, Chicngo, says of it : "Wheo all else fails in bealing our babies, it will cure."-Hugheon-Ligon Co. THE BOERS REPLY IS OMINOUS OF WAR. Withdraw Former Conces sions and Agree to Con ference. Pretoria, Sept. 4.-The reply of the Transvaal republic to the demaods of Great Britain increases the term of years residence necessary io order to obtain the franchise. In the coime of an interview today, State Secretary Reitz said the Trans vaal government was waiting until Sat urday's dispatch reaohed the imperial authorities before making itc contente public. Without, however, enteri g into details, he could say that io his judgment the proposal of the govern ment offered Mr Chamberlain an opportunity of comiog to a settlement regarding the franchise tod other outstanding questions. He could also say that the Transvaal would take part in the suggested conference and was now awaiting the imperial govern ment's reply io order to arrange the details as to a place of meeting. Loudon, Sept. 4 -A dispatch from Johannesburg to Renter's Agency de finitely announces that the reply of the Transvaal republic to the British communication withdraws the franchise proposals and agrees io principle to a conference at Capetown. The afternoon papers take the view that if the foregoing dispatch is cor rect, President Kruger's reply is ominous, as it was palpably made to gain time. Sir Alfred Milner's sug gestion of a farther conference at Capetown was instigated with the sole purpose of considering details and for the enforcement of the concessions offered by the Boers. If these conces sions are withdrawn there eau be no object from a British poiot of view for the parleying longer. The only infer ence to be drawn is that the Boers have taken Mr. Joseph Chamberlain, the secretary of state for the colonies, at his word in the broader sense than he intended, and that they now want to begin negotiations over again on an entirely new basis. The shrewdness of this reported move is not likely to save it from being interpreted by the British government as a thinly veiled* defiance ; and unless it is accompanied by a vague agreement tc farther confer, it would generally be taken as sufficient cause for immediate hostilities. Regarding the exact terms of the reply io question, reports continue mystifying io contradictions, bat all agree that the excitement io Johannes barg is unabated, aod that the exodus from that city is continuing and that distress there is increasing. Cable grams from Boer and British South Africa detail war preparations on ali sides. The Johannesburg correspondent of The Standard says : "I iearn from an official who bas been earnestly striving for peace that the matter is now hope lees The Boers will probably declare war at 48 hours notice and will try to raid Natal before the British troops arrive. I believe the Orange Free State will join the Transvaal, but that the B^ers io Natai and the Cape Colony wili remain quiet at the outset, unless irritated by the dismissal of the Cape Colony cabinet. "The Boers have the fallest confi dence in their magazine ride and their skill in marksmanship. State Attorney Smuiusisthe chief inciter of the war party. Thirty thousand men in the Transvaal and twenty thousand io the Oraoge Free State will take the field." The Times prints a letter from the bishop of Pretoria, appealing for funds to relieve the terrible distress oaused by tbe protracted tension and the fears of war. A dispatch to the Daily Mail from Delagoa Bay says the refugees from Barbarton declare that they ware ffar d io leave, as the Boers intended to cordoo the district. The seoretary of state for the colo nies, Joseph Chamberlain, arrived in London this afternoon and st ooce proceeded to the foreign office. It is understood that he will remaio here until the end of the crisis. The war office refuses to confirm the rumor that a proclamation will be issued calling out the reserves. Treasurer E. D. Free, of Barnwell county, who has recently appointed to the office to succeed bis father who bad been tresurer for a number of years prior to his death, has notified Gov. McSweeney that he finds a shortage of $8.700 in his father's accounts He states also that his fathers estate, valued at $10,000 or more will be turned over to the bondsmen to reimburse them. A Good Memory. "Excuse me, sir, but haven't we met before? Your face ls strangely famil iar." "Yes, madam, our host introduced us to each other just before dinner." "Ah, I was positive I had seen you somewhere! I never forget a face." Harlem Life. CUBAN OIL cures Cuts, ' Burns, Bruises, Rheuma tism and Sores. Price, 25 cts. Sold bj KugbEOQ-Ligon Co. GRAM1 CALMED THEM AN INCIDENT OF JOHNSON'S FAMOUS SWING AROUND THE CIRCLE. A. Painful Spectacle "Which the Gen eral Brought to a Close hy Forcing the Tumultu os Crowd to Listen to tho President. There is nothing in history that cor responds to that wonderful swing of President Johnson from Washington to Chicago by way of Robin Hood's barn. Mr. Johnson planned the trip with in finite cunning. He prided himself on being a commoner, and he believed that he understood the people and that if he could meet them face to face he could convince them that the presi dent was right and congress wrong. To get the love of the people he carried with him General Grant, Admiral Far ragut, Secretaries Seward, Welles and Randall, General Custer and other men well known to the people. He reason ed that, accompanied by the popular idols of the day. he would be sure of enthusiastic reception everywhere. That was all that he asked. Give him a big crowd, and he was confident that he could win them over. The president started from Wash ington with a chip on his shoulder. The very fist crowd he met knocked it off without ceremony. It soon became clear the people were in a resentful mood, and after two or three clashes some of Mr. Johnson's best friends recommended a change of programme. Many believed that the president, see ing the mood of the people, would yield, but they didn't know the man. I had seen him face all sorts of crowds while he was military governor of Tennessee. I had heard him scold the leading citizens of Nashville as he would a lot of school children; had seen him, when a mob threatened his life, stride out into the street and march the full length of the city at the head of a procession, carrying the stars and stripes, and 1 knew that he would relish keenly a scrap with those who defied him. At one point a crowd of 0,000 people nad gathered, mainly to see Grant, Farragut and Seward. There was tre mendous enthusiasm over the party, and the president was elated. But when he rose to speak the crowd hoot ed and hissed and set up a great shout for Grant. The people had seen through the president's scheme and were turn ing the tables on him by using Grant and Farragut to humiliate and punish him. The president saw the' strategy of the move, and he was as furious as he was helpless. In every interval of quiet he would attempt to speak, but every word he uttered would be lost in the thunder of the shouts for Grant. It was a painful spectacle, and every ! body was embarrassed. The crowd would not listen to the chairman or any other local celebrity. General Custer, then at the height of his popularity, stepped forward in his dramatic, imperious way, believing that he could quiet the tumult. The crowd was friendly, but it howled him down, and the dashing cavalryman took his seat, with the remark that he would like to clear the grounds with a brigade of cavalry, Johnson, looking down on the tumult, saw smiling, contemptuous faces, but no hatred. He turned to Grant, who had retired to the rear of the platform, and said petulantly, "General, you will have to speak to them." General Grant said decisively, "I will not." * Then the president said, more gra ciously, "Won't you show yourself, general?" Grant stepped forward, and, after a round of cheers, the people were as quiet as a church in prayer time. Wait ing an instant, Grant raised his hand, made a gesture toward Johnson and said clearly, "The president of the United States." The incident was a simple one, but it spoke volumes. Grant's face was full of indignation and reproach, and the crowd, accepting his rebuke, listened to the president for an hour. And the president did not spare the people. He scolded them to his heart's content, re plied to all their taunts, talked back to every man that opened his mouth and seemed to enjoy the performance as a war horse would a battle. The people took the scolding in good part and re alized that they had come in contact with a new sort of president. They heard him in respectful silence, but they disapproved of him, as the presi dent knew when the votes were count ed at t h eel ec t i o n. t ha t fa II. Seward's "face af "such meetings was a study. The wound in his neck was only fairly healed, and the people took a deferential attitude toward him. But still everybody wanted to see him and shake hands with him. Farragut, In crossing the rotunda of the capitol, came upon a group of la dies, one of whom turned toward him and eagerly inquired, "Are you Mr. Seward?" Farragut answered without a moment's hesitation: "No; I am a handsomer man than Seward. My name is Farragut."-Chi cago Inter Ocean. Where Butter Is Blue. "What was the most striking thing you saw in India?"' was asked of a woman who has just returned from a tour round the world. "Butter,'* she replied. "That seems strange, but it's a fact that in India butter mado from the thin milk of tho native cow is blue instead of yellow. "When I came across this azure sub stance. I vowed I would never touch it," but others did so, with evident enjoy ment, and, curiosity gettiug the upper hand, I tried the butter and to my sur prise found it- delicious. You who see the golden pots of fresh butter used in America can hardly realize what it is to see bread painted blue. "The blue batter of India is prefer able to the stuff tliey serve M butter iu Norway and Sweden," continued the globe trotter, "for there we had noth ing but oleomargarine."-Philadelphia Times. SHORT WORDS. ELere Are Some, and They Are Righi to the Point. The following paragraph on "The Use of Short Words'' is attributed to Horatio Seymour. It practices what it preached therein, since there is no word in it with more than two sylla bles, save such as are quoted for pur poses of illustration: "We must not only think in words, but we must also try to use the best words and those which in speech will put what is in our minds into the minds of others. This ls the great art which those must gain who wish to Teach in the school, the church, at the bar or through the press. To do this in the right way they should use nie short words which we learn in early Life and which have the same sense to all classes of men. The English of our Bible is good. N v and then some long words are found, and they always hurt the verses in which you find them. Take that which says, 'O ye generation of vipers, who hath warned you to flee from the wrath to come? There is one long word which ought not to be in it namely, 'generation.' In the old ver sion the old word 'brood' is used. Read the verse with the term, and you will feel its full force: '0 ye viper's brood, who hath warned you to flee from the wrath to come?' Crime sometimes does not look like crime when it is set before us in the many folds of a long word. When a man steals and we call lt a 'defalcation,' we are at a loss to know if it is a plunder or a crime. If he does not tell the truth, and we are told that it is a case of 'prevarication,' it takes us some time to know just what we should think of it No man will ever cheat himself into wrongdo ing, nor will he be at a loss to judge of others if he thinks and speaks of acts in clear, crisp terms. It is a good rule, if one is at a loss to know if an act is right or wrong, to write it down in short, straightout English." A Vindictive Reptil . The fer-de-lance is found on the Is lands of Martinique and Santa Lucia, where the natives counteract its virus with a decoction of jungle hemlock, and the basis of its grewsome reputa tion seems to be the fact that it does not warn the intruders of its haunts, after the manner of the cobra or the rattlesnake, but flattens its coils and, with slightly vibrating tail, awaits events. If the unsuspecting traveler should show no sign of hostile intent, he may be allowed to pass unharmed within two yards of the coiled matadore, but a closer approach is apt to bc construed as a challenge, and the vivoron, sud denly rearing its ugly head, may scare the trespasser into some motion of self defense-he may lift his foot or brand ish his stick in a menacing manner. If he does, he is lost The lower coils will expand, bringing the business end, neck and all, a few feet nearer; the head "points" like a leveled rifle, then darts forward with electric swiftness, guided by an unerring instinct for the selection of the least protected parts of the body. And the vindictive brute is ready to repeat its bite. For a moment it rears back, trembling with excitement, and, if felled by a blow of its victim's stick, will snap away savagely at stumps and stones or even, like a wounded pan ther, at its own body.-Popular Science A Silent lebnke. A curly haired small boy sat in a Fourteenth street car just at the time of the day when the cars are most crowded on Thursday afternoon. A worn looking woman, evidently his mother, sat beside him. At Fifteenth street a particularly buxom woman of middle age crowded into the car. There was no seat for her, and she stood glar ing at the boy. Later her displeasure vented itself in words, and she express ed herself freely to the woman who stood next her about women who let their children occupy seats while ladies are standing. The worn looking wom an flushed, but made no move to have the boy surrender his seat The buxom woman still glared and still expressed herself with extreme frankness. The boy sat still. At X street the mother rang the bell. As the car stopped she put her arms around the boy and lifted him to his feet, half carrying him to the door. "Won't you take this seat?" she said to the buxom woman. "I am just tak ing him home from thc hospital." And as the car rolled on the buxom woman looked warmer than the weath er warranted.-Washington Post Tcxfli' Old Name. Probably the ff ct is not generally known that Texas was at one time and for many years called the "New rkilippines." The first settlement iu what is now Texas was made by French emigrants in 1GS . During the next 25 years there was an intermit tent struggle between the French and Spanish far supremacy, resulting in favor of tflt latter, and in 1814 the name of the New Philippines was given to the country. This was its offi cial name in Spanish records for many years and until the name of Texas, from a tribe of Indians, gradually came in vogue.-Indianapolis Journal. A H nscheid Hint. Don't throw away the trimmings from your new tablecloths. Those long linen threads you will need when your tablecloth begins to break a little. With them you can prolong its span of life many days. Also try in ironing your tablecloths to have them folded in different ways to vary the creases so tha; the wear will not come always in the same place. A Good Explnnntion. "Papa, I know what makes some petrie laugh in their sleeves," said lit tle Harry. "Well, my sou, what makes them?'' asked the father. " 'Cause that's where their funny bone is," was the reply.-Troy Times. \ A FEAT IN GLASS BLOWING. The Trick Which a Russian Sprang on thc Experts. Emperor Nicholas wished to illumi nate theAlexander column in a grand style. The size of the round lamps to be used for the purpose were indicated and the glasses ordered at the manu factory, where the workmen exerted themselves in vain and almost blew the breath out of their bodies ic the endeavor to obtain the desired size. The commission must be executed, that was self evident, but how? A great premium was offered to the one who could solve the problem. Again the human bellows toiled and puffed. Their object seemed unattainable, when at last a long bearded Russian stepped forward and declared that he could do it; he had strong lungs; he would only rinse his mouth first with a little water to refresh them. He applied his mouth to the pipe and puffed to such purpose that the vitre ous ball swelled and puffed nearly to the required dimensions, up to them, beyond tl^em. "Hold! Hold!" cried the lookers on. "You are doing too much. And how did you clo it all?" "The matter is simple enough," an swered the long beard, "but first, where is my premium?" And when he clutched the promised bounty he explained. He had retained some of the water in his mouth, which had passed thence into the glowing ball and then, becom ing steam, had rendered him this good service.-Chicago Inter Ocean. \ Locking? Up at Gibraltar. Perhaps the favorite sight of Gibral tar is the daily procession at sundown for the locking of the town gates. The keeper of the keys, looking very like a prisoner despite his uniform, marches through the town in the center of a military guard, preceded by a regi mental band, which plays inspiring and familiar tunes. The keys, of enor mous size, are borne aloft before him as an outward and visible emblem of the vigilance of Britain in guarding her prime military treasure. On arriving at the gates the guard salutes, the martial strains strike up with a redoubled paean of triumph,' while the great doors slowly swing to and are solemnly locked for the night: Then right about turn, and the pro-1 cession marches back to the convent to j deposit the keys in the governor's keep- j ing, conveying by its passage an assur- i ance to the people and garrison that; they may rest in peace. Once the gates are shut, it were eas- ' 1er for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for any unauthorized .person to go into Gibraltar. Eyen a be lated officer returning from -pig stick-, ing beyond the lines would be con fronted by so many formalities and the necessity of inconveniencing so many high personages that he would prob ably prefer to encounter the discom fort of a Spanish inn without Countess Ito's Bravery* Many years ago, when quite a young man, during a rebellion, Count Ito was hiding from his enemies, who, having tracked him to his house, sent a band of "sohsis" to assassinate him. On hearing his enemies approaching and trapped like a rat in its hole, the count drew his sword and prepared to die, but the countess whispered, "Do not die; there is hope still," and removing the "hibatchi," or firebox, and lifting up the mats and the planks beneath, she induced her husband to conceal himself in the hollow space which ex ists under the floors of all Japanese houses. The murderers broke Into the room just as the firebox had been replaced I and demanded of the countess their victim. In vain they threatened and cruelly ill treated her, dragging her about the room by her long black hair. But it was of no avail. They could not shake her resolute fidelity. Thanks to her courage Count Ito escaped and has lived to give to Lis country a new con stitution and become one of the great est statesmen of modern Japan. I often wonder when I see the countess, now a delicate, gray haired, little lady, at the courage and presence of mind that she displayed at that critical moment of her life.-Cornhill ^Iagazine. Almost Criminal Xegrlect. "Here," said the statesman who had been temporary chairman of the con vention, "I'd like to know what kind of a party organ you're running anyway." "Why." the editor asked, "what's wrong?" "In your account of the proceedings you have not once referred to my speech as 'a ringing address!' Chicago Times-Herald. Xo G host* Could Fool Him. A naval officer who held a civil em ployment at Rhode Island during the American war of independence and who was of a remarkably spare, skele tonlike figure was stopped by a sen tinel late one night on his return from a visit and shut up in the sentry box, the soldier declaring that he should re main there until his officer came his rounds at 12 o'clock. "My good fellow," said Mr. W-, "I have told you who I am, and I really think you ought to take my word." "It will not do," replied the soidier. "I am by no means satisfied." Then, taking from his pocket a quar ter of a dollar and presenting it, "Will that satisfy you?" "Why. yes; 1 think it will." "And now that I am released, pray tell me why you detained me at yocr post?" "I appreheuded you," said the soldier, "as a deserter from the churchyard." Mirror. A Bine Gran Definer. The applicants for teachers' certifi cates iu Cnlloway county were asked at examination to define "bric-a-brac." One teacher answered that "bric-a brac is something to throw at a dog." -Louisville Courier-Journal.