The sun. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1937-1972, August 10, 1951, Image 7
We WALLOW in mud,
But I'm tellin'you, bud-
By POSEN
k- v
We're still just as homely
as SIN."
1 ssorinu^ly doubt that Bonton.
the town from whence came i. is
blessed with any greater number
of characters than any other town
its size. Still, it certainly has had
its share of unusual personalities.
Tor instance, there was the old
storekeeper I remember. After
being a holdout for many years,
this old gent finally bought him
self one of those new-fangled con
traptions they came to call the
automobile- He learned to drive it.
but he never accustomed himself
to traffic rules. He was more or
less a free-style driver and so his
conduct in traffic was at best un
orthodox.
One day, the story goes, he
drove down to Memphis and was
cruising down a crowded street
when he suddenly decided he Was
going in the wrong direction. So
what did he do but stop and start
turning around right in the mid
dle of the street while traffic piled
up for several blocks in all direc
tions. Within a few seconds the
area was crawling with cops.
‘Don’t you know you can’t turn
around in t h e^ middle of the
street?” bawled a burly bulk
“Well, n o w,” the old gent
drawled in a voice that twanged
like a loose guitar string, “I be
lieve I can make it!”
Another time he had driven to
St. Louis and there he created
quite a disturbance in that nar
row-minded city by trying to drive
on the wrong side of the street
Once again -the cops appeared as
if by magic.
“What’s the matter with you?”
screamed a red-faced policeman.
“You drunk?”
‘No,” need the unruffled driver,
‘I ain’t drunk yet—just got here!”
THE ELASTIC FEE
OftSON/ PONT VOL) \
KNOW IT'S WRONG 70J
STEAL? GIVE. “
ME THAT
•ILL
IT//
Bv NICK PENN
MUTT AND JEFF
By Bud Fisher
JITTER
By Arthur Pointer
WYLDE AND WOOLY
By Bert Thomas
WHY IN THE WORLD ARE
YOU HITTING VERSELF
OYER THE HEAD, BUD?
'Got a spore 'Mickey Finn' on you, mister?'
■Bf
The lawyer surveyed the tattered
client as he listened, and decided
that he would be lucky to obtain a
ten-dollar fee. He named that
amount as necessary to secure the
prisoner’s release. Thereupon, the
client drew forth a large roll of
bills, and peeled off a ten. The law
yer’s greedy eyes popped.
“What jail is your son in?” he
inquired craftily.
“In the county jail.”
“In the county Jail, not the city
jail!” was the exclamation in a tone
of dismay. “That’s bad—very bad.
It will cost you at least fifty dol
lars.”
Put In His Place
Magnate (to poor suitor): “Young
man, do you know how I made my
money?”
Young man: “Yes, but I can’t
permit that to stand in the way of
Muriel’s happiness.”
AMAZING!
A man was discovered by his
wife one night standing over his
baby’s crib. Silently she watched
him. As he stood looking down at
the sleeping infant, she saw in
his face a mixture of emotions—
rapture, doubt, admiration, despair,
ecstasy, incredulity. Touched and
wondering alike at this unusual
parental attitude and the conflicting
emotions the wife with eyes glist
ening arose and slipped her arms
around him.
“A penny for your thoughts,” she
said, in a voice tremulous. He blurU
ed them out:
“For the life of me, I can’t see
how anybody can make a crib like
that for three forty-nine!”
DISTINCTION
A new system of memory train
ing was being taught in a village
school, and the teacher was be
coming enthusiastic.
“For instance,” he said, “sup
posing you want to remember
the name of a poet—Bobby Burns.
Fix in your mind’s eye a picture
of a policeman in flames. See—
Bobby Burns?”
“Yes, 1 see,” said a bright
pupil. “But how is any one to
know it does not represent Rob
ert Browning?”
"Bernhard is SO kindhearted. He wishes there were
more of him so he could date ALL the girls in school!"
Poor Service
After several hours’ fishing little
Patty suddenly threw down her pole
and exclaimed, “I quit!”
“Why, Patty, what’s the matter?”
asked her mother.
“Well, Mother,” she answered,
“I just can’t seem to get waited
on!”
FIRST AID to the
AILING HOUSE)
BY ROGER C. WHITMAN
Question: I just finished the
staggering task of removing some
casein paint from a bathroom ceil
ing, by using a strong water sof
tener solution and a scraper. I am
now down to the plaster. Do I treat
the bare plaster the same as when
new; that is, by using sizing, un
dercoat and then paint? I had to
remove the casein paint because
it started to peel and let go of the
ceiling.
Answer: YoLi did all right, for
you succeeded in doing what, you
started out to do. But the water
softening solution should all be
thoroughly washed off, for if you
let it stay on the ceiling, it will
continue to work on your new
paint and spoil the job. Use plenty
of water for the wash-off. When
the ceiling is quite dry, apply two
coats of enamel undercoater and
a finish of enamel following the
directions on the label. Where you
made your original mistake was
in putting casein paint on the
bathroom ceiling. The steam loos
ened th% paint and caused it to
peel. Enamel is the right kind of
finish for bathroom and kitchen
surfaces (unless you are going to
use other hard finishes for the
walls). Flat wall paints are not
supposed to be used for these
rooms.
Coal Was Created
Before Human Advent
What is coal? How was it made?
Well, it all started many millions
of years ago, in what is called the
Carboniferous Period. We some-,
times call it the Coal Age. The
cjimate was very warm and moist
all over the earth. There were
heavy rains. Plants grew fast and
luxuriantly, especially in swampy
areas.
In our country, these great
swamps extended in all directions
to where we find coal today in
what is now Pennsylvania and
the whole Appalachian range, the
middle Atlantic states, the Rocky
Mountains, and even the far away
Pacific Coast. The forest trees
resembled giant ferns, reeds, and
mosses, rising to heights of 100 to
120 feet, and many feet in diame
ter. Other trees looked much like
enormous ferns, climbing 50 feet
into the air.
Everything was green and lush
in this strange world. The giant
trees, ferns, grasses, insect life
and other creatures, died, fell into
the swamps and became part of
the sea life buried there. Heavy
rains washed soil and sand from
high places into the swampy low
lands. Land gradually sank. The
great inland seas advanced and
covered up these peat-like bogs,
keeping out air and bacteria that
cause decay. Again conditions on
the earth changed. The land was
raised up and once more forests
grew, flourished, and died. Again
the land sank and the seas ad
vanced.
This process continued over and
over through untold thousands of
years. The sunshine, whose
warmth and magic made these
forests, was buried with the vege
tation. Slowly the forests piled up
one atop of the other, the peat
layers began changing into some
thing we now call lignite, and the
enormous deposits of dead leaves,
branches, tninks, insect life, and
sea life were transformed slowly
into coal and other minerals.
The quality of legume and grass
silage can be improved by letting
the green material partially wilt
before putting it into the silo, and
by adding 60 pounds of molasses,
or 150 pounds of ground shelled
corn, or 200 pounds of ground ear
com to each ton as the silo is
fiHed.
* * •
Coal of the Samchok basin, larg
est fuel source in South Korea,
is poor anthracite hard to bum un
less mixed with bituminous, but
its use reduces expensive imports
of other fuels.
Pruning and dormant sprayftig
of trees and shrubs may be done
any time when the temperature is
45 degrees or higher.
' • • *
The typical raindrop shape is
produced by air pressure. The
raindrop would be a sphere if it
were floating free in space or
falling in a vacuum.
• • •
Bowling is believed to have
originated as a rite among early
Christians in Germany.
dividing vour attention
S/7/r
MULTIPLY YOUR TROUBLES
m.
ill
Vi
•••
■w®
w
AtmHJTE
■ SPARK PLUGS
Oraotor Oat Savings—
Auto-Lits Resistor Spark
Plugs offer cor owners new
advantages found only
in automotive type spark
plugs with built-in resistors.
VJ
Unsurpassed Qualify—
Auto-Ute Standard Spark
Plugs offer outstanding
quality and have long boon
recognized for
beatable |
Cost Pur Mil* of
spark plug operation • . •
Auto-Ute Transport Spark
have aircraft type
electrodes
for heavy duty.
SEE YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD AUTO-LITE SPARK PLUG DEALER NOW
SPCRTSCOPE
By Je«
MAHONEY
sly the best compliment that
BE PAID RAPID ROBERT TODAY IS
^ SAY HE HAD POOR SEASONS IN ,
»Q48/4Q AND'SO. DURING THOSE*POOR
SEASONS HE WON 19, 15 AND 16
GAMES RESPECTIVELY. IN
1950 HE WON THE LAST
6 GAMES STRAIGHT AND
HIS 3.43 EARNED RUN
RECORD WAS THIRD BEST
IN THE AMERICAN LEAGUE. .
t
OF THE ATHLETICS
FART1CIRATED IN 194 DOUBLE
PLAYS IN 1949 FOR A MAJOR
LEAGUE RECORD.
LEATHER
OR RUBBER
StLBNCe HUM OP SCREEN DOOR.
SPRING BV INSERTING PIECE OF RUBBER
BETWEEN THE HOOKS AND SPRING*
MweDocfms
SmoteCWs
“ffatotcuy dfot
cigafidfe,!
according to a repeated
nationwide survey of doctors
in every branch of medicine!