The sun. [volume] (Newberry, S.C.) 1937-1972, March 19, 1948, Image 9
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THE NEWBERRY SUN, NEWBERRY, S. C-
Grandma
SPEARIN'...
ONT5 THING everybody learns
easy Is that home is never closer
to the heart than when ye’re far
away from it.
S5 paid Mr,. J. Guinn. Pukenbnrr, W. Va.*
JUr>
AIN’T NO TWO WAYS about it
If ye’re lookin’ for a margarine
you kin be proud to set on the
table, then ye’re lookin’ fer Nu-
Maid TableXJrade Margarine . ..
made 'specially fer the table. Jes
taste it n see!
dko
FOLKS who are always itchin’
fer something oughta try gettin’
out and scratchin’ fer it*
* t5
will be paid upon publica
tion to the first contributor of
each accepted saying or idea for
"Grandma Speakin’.’’ Address
Nu-Maid Margarine, Cincianati
2, Ohio.
JU*
Tired of coloring your own mar
garine? Write your Congressmen
and Senators and tell them to re-
psal the 10c per pound "Spite
Tax” on colored margarine.
BOBBY
SOX
Mart]! Links
“I feel sorry for her—knowing that boys just flock
around because she’s got a car!”
CROSS
TOWN
Bv
Roland Coe
“People I bought it from said they had so many invita
tions to dine out they never had a chance to use it!”
NANCY
"watching a
THREE-RING
CIRCUS IS
TOUGH WORK
By Ernie Bushmiller
To b/e-Grade
MARGARINE
TEA for the
The Immortal Alamo
Maxwell House is
specially blended to suit
the Southern tea lover.
Fragrant, hearty, true
tea flavor in a blend of
choice Ceylon and India teas.
Mellow, delicious!
Ask your grocer for
Maxwell House Tea today.
A Product of General Foods
UTTLE REGGIE
By Margarita
JITTER
By Arthur Pointer
t/STEN.SUSIE, I'LLBE LATH
HOME- THE BOSS JUST
DUMPED A LOT OF EXTRA
WORK ON /AY DESK.
REG’LAR FELLERS
By Gene Byrnes
YOU .SAID YOU
WERE THROUGH
WITH GAMBLING
FOREVER/
f I PROMISE. YA *
IF I LOBE THIS TIME V WBLL
I’W DONE FOR GOOD/ 1 OKAY —
TM THROUGH / / JUST THIS
I'M WASHEDA1P/ 1 ONCE/
CROSS MY HEART' ,
VIRGIL
By Len Kleis
Fair Settlement
U P IN Minnesota Mr. Olsen had a
cow killed by a railroad train.
In due season the claim agent for
the railroad called.
“We understand, of course, that
the deceased was a very docile and
valuable animal,” said the claim
agent in his most persuasive man
ner, “and we sympathize with you
and your family in your loss. But,
Mr. Olsen, you must remember
this: Your cow had no business be
ing upon our tracks. Those tracks
are our private property and when
she invaded them, she became a
trespasser. Technically speaking,
you, as her owner, became a tres
passer also. But we have no desire
to carry the issue into court and
possibly give you trouble. Now then,
what would you regard as a fair
settlement between you and the
railroad company?”
“Vail,” said Mr. Olsen slowly,
“Ay bane poor Swede farmer, but
Ay shall give you two dollars.”
SLIP OF TONGUE
Boss — do#s your wife know
you’re bringing me to dinner?
Clerk — does she know! Why,
it’s taken me six months to talk
her into it
Artful Dodger
At the breakfast table a young
broker was relating an incident
which had occurred the night before
at his lodge meeting. The president,
he said, had offered a silk hat to any
member who would soberly declare
that during his married life he had
never kissed any woman but his
own wife.
“Dear,” he marveled, “do you
know, not a single man stood up.”
"Why didn’t you?” the wife de
manded.
“Oh, darling,” rejoined the wily
one, “you know I look terrible in a
silk hat.”
Small Fry
The youngster having found a
cute little brown mouse in the flat
his family occupied, was all for tak
ing it to school with him. His mother
tried to talk him out of the idea.
"It’s all right. Mother,” said the
youngster. “We got lots of mice in
school.”
“Yes, but tho*e are white mice,”
the mother argued.
The kid looked at her in disgust.
“Aha,” he said. “Race prejudice,
huh?”
•PASS THE MUSTARD’
"Yes,” said the cheerful one, tell
ing of a harrowing experience, "we
had reached the place where we had
eaten the last dog.”
“It must have been terrible!” ex
claimed the fair listener.
“It was,” he said; “they didn’t
even have mustard to put on it, and
it was at least 20 miles to the next
stand.”
The Judge Knew
“You are charged,” said the
Judge, “with throwing your mother-
in-law out of the window. Have you
anything to say?”
"Yes, your honor, I did it without
thinking.”
“I realize that, my good man, but
don’t you see how dangerous it was
for anyone who might have been
passing at the time.”
Misunderstanding
Asylum inmate (to man driving
by with a load of fertilizer)—What
are you going to do with that?
Driver—Put it on my strawber
ries.”
A. I.—That’s funny. We put sugar
on our strawberries.
Rasie in Salary
Under the community-property
law a husband is entitled to half his
income, which is a big increase for
most married men.
‘MARCHE MILITAIRE’
A little piano pupil who had
learned her music lesson very well
was told she could choose her next
piece.
“Oh, please, may I learn ‘Marsh
mallow Tear’?” she asked.
“I don’t believe I know that,” an
swered the teacher. “Could you
hum a few measures of it for me?”
The child began to sing, and pres
ently the teacher recognized the
melody of Schubert’s “Marche Mill-
taire.”
Million Irishmen Attend
Largest Political Meeting
Probably the largest political
mass meeting in history, says Col
lier’s, was that called at Tara, Ire
land, on August 15, 1843, to hear
the Irish statesman, Daniel O’Con
nell, demand the repeal of the
union between his country and
Great Britain.
It was attended by more than
1,000,000 people, a number equiva
lent, at that time, to one person
in every family in Ireland.
Beware Coughs
from common colds
That Hang On
Creomulsian relieves promptly be
cause it goes right to the seat of the
trouble to help loosen and expel
germ laden phlegm, and aid nature
to soothe and heal raw, tender, in
flamed bronchial mucous mem
branes. Tell your druggist to sell you
a bottle of Creomulsion with the un
derstanding you must like the way it
quickly allays the cough or you are
to have your money back.
CREOMULSION
for Couchs, Chest Colds, Bronchitis
"7/re //artc/Zes/ Too/..
/'BUSHMAN SAW')
V With Swedish Steel Blode^/
Thousands of progressive farmer*
know and appreciate the numerous
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cutting firewood, fence posts, tree
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Razor sharp blade cuts smooth »t
high speed, stays sharp longer. 24.
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"Iniiston Buihman,”nothing comport*.
AT LEADING HARDWARE STORES
GENSCO TOOL DIVISION
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just send 15^ and one Rice Krispies box
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MAKES YOUR BIKE SOUND
LIKE A MOTORCYCLE
COPYRICHT >»4». »T KELLORR CO. j
[riceI
MlSPIfst
(HAS YOUR DOCTOR SAID:^
U
REDUCE SMOKING”?
Then ask him about SANO #
the safer cigarette with
51.6%* i-ess
NICOTINE
<
Vi
Not a Substitute—Not Medicated t
Sano’s scientific process cuts nico
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row DOCTOR KNOWS ABOUT SANO CICAUTTtS
How to help your sick child
GET WELL FASTER
. as recommended in the interest
of child welfare by
ROSE G. ANDERSON, Ph.D.
Dinetor of The Psychological Sarvica Cantor, Now York
1. The after-effects of
your child’s illness are
often more important
than the illness itself.
Pampering, catering to
whims, oversolicitude
teaches a child to dom
inate through weakness.
Such well-meant kind
ness may prolong his
convalescence.
2. You’ll be smart to help
him amuse himself. Give
him something which
doesn’t require an adult’s
constant attention. Give
him your "Eveready”
flashlight... or get him
one of his own. If he
tires of flashing the
beam, or flicking out
imaginary signals, then...
3. Show him how to cut
designs or figures from
stiff paper and how to
throw their shadows on
the ceiling or wall. Mov
ing the figures will make
them dance. Watch his
pride in what he’s done.
Watch him get well fast
er because he’s happier!
Proof!... In tho laboratory... in your own flashlight...
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ALL OTHER BRANDS P
• Brighter light, longer life! That’s what you
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The registered trade-mark‘'Eveready”dIstingul8hes products of
NATIONAL CARBON COMPANY, INC.
30 East 42nd Street, New York 17, N. Y.
Vmit of Union Carbide and Carbon Corporation
CH3
* According to the "General-
Purpose 4 - Ohm Intermittent
Test" devised by the American
Standards Association, which
most closely approximates aver
age use.