University of South Carolina Libraries
THE NEWBERRY SUN. NEWBERRY. S. C. THE MAN FROM MARS AND THE AMERICAN RADIO Ogwopi, the Man from Mars, had spent a week-end in America and was most anxious to return without delay. Nothing could make him stay longer. It seems he had spent the time listening to the radio. “How do you like America?” we asked. “As the seat of stomach acidity, bleeding gums, scalp troubles, in testinal difficulties and the like it is terrific,” he replied. We didn’t quite follow him. “I had no idea the United States was a place mainly concerned with matters of gastric juices,” he con tinued. “Yours is a distinctly phar maceutical land, isn’t it?” “Pharmaceutical?” we asked. “Yes,” said the Man from Mars. “I devoted most of my visit to learn ing about America from the radio, a most wonderful device, and I nev er heard so much talk about pills, ointments, lotions, seltzers, capsules, tablets, purges, etcetera, in my life. You people must really be in very bad way.” We began to understand now. “One of the chief industries of your country,” continued the Man from Mars, "seems to be handling the bad breath and body odor situa tion, which I take it from the broad casts, are your foremost national problem.” “Now look,” we began. “And you take it all in such a jol ly mood,” he kept on. ‘So many of the radio references were in song. The handling of B.O., as you call it, in a musical mood is quite original. But doesn’t it ever get on your nerves?” “I suppose that to a person from smother planet, totally unfamiliar with our customs, the radio must give a strange impression,” we said. "What do Americans do when not taking vitamins?” he asked. "Oh, that doesn’t take up much of their time,” we insisted. “But it must,” said Ogwopi, the Man from Mars. “I’m a fairly ac tive person but I couldn’t possibly consider all the vitamins, make the essential selection, take as di rected and have a free moment left. And your people’s scalps and teeth must be in awful condition.” “Not necessarily,” we said. “The air is jammed with urgent lectures on what to do about them,” insisted the Man from Mars. “I made a two-hour check. The coast- to-coast discussions of constipation topped everything else on the air, but the advices on anti-stomach acid ity, dry scalp and mouthwashes ran very close. You have my deepest sympathy.” • * * He was reaching for his hat. “Oh, one thing,” he said in the doorway, “what was the name of that beer that wins wars? I want to tell my countrymen about it. We have our disturbances you know. It might come in very handy.” We gave him the name of six beers and three ales. • • • “And that cigar?” he asked. "Which cigar?” “The one the announcer says has been giving people poise, content ment, companionship and the feel ing of brotherhood for 70 years?” At that moment we tuned in on the radio inadvertently. A voice de manded, “Are you over 35?” The Man from Mars zoomed away. • • • Global Croonery. (“I have not hesitated to travel from court to court like a wander ing minstrel. But always with the same song or the same set of songs.”—Winston Churchill.) A wandering minstrel I— A thing of shreds and patches. Of ballads, songs and snatches. Designed for amity! My catalog is long; With special tunes in Russian; Avoiding all percussion I sing of right and wrong! I wander from court to court To sing of understandings (While making three-point landings) To make the battle short! I deftly tune my lyre To keep us all as brothers, And soothe the Poles and others— And not stir Joseph’s iret I’m in the minstrel “biz”— I warble hither-thither. So friendships may not wither— But what a job it is! • • • Frightened Off When critics say, “This play’s ■ ‘must,’ ” I have no yen to get there fust. • • • Rhineland Version. Herr Goebbels has announced that German school children must now work in war factories. Schooldays, schooldays, dear old golden rule days. Welding and drilling and sweat ing, oh! All for our leader, the so-and-so. • • • "Wanted: Young man assist in lamp dept; light work. E. B. La tham, 250 Fourth.”—Herald-Tribune. * It sounds logical. Soil Fertility Is Essential to Food Fertilizers Help to Increase Value of Acre Agriculture, in all its forms, rests upon the basis of soil fertility. What ever renews or increases that fer tility benefits the farmer and those dependent upon him for food, cloth ing and essential articles from farm commodities. War Food administration reports show that the planting of millions CORN PROOUCTIOM ’THIS IS WHERE FERTILIZER. WAS USER. M d!****- Increaie* as much as 57% resulted Irom fertilizer use. of additional acres in crops has been avoided during the war years, by in creased use of fertilizer, resulting in marked increases in yield. It has been determined that two extra bales of cotton were produced per ton of fertilizer; 125 extra bush els of com; 85 bushels of wheat; 185 bushels of potatoes; and 140 bush els of oats. On a group of West Virginia farms, forage production was re ported increased 57 per cent from the use of a ton of ground limestone and 180 pounds of triple superphos phate per acre. Protein content of the forage increased more than 40 per cent. Winter le gume cover crops on which fertilizer was used showed in creased growth, which was reflected in larger yields of succeeding crops benefitfing from turning under the green manure. An average increase of more than 11 bushels of corn per acre was reported from plantings Immediately following the vetch, without the use of additional fer tilizer. Increases in alfalfa hay yields from fertilizing the soil were re ported as 33 per cent in the north eastern states; 25 per cent in the east central area; 40 per cent in the south; and 15 per cent in the north central and western regions. How to Keep Poultry Flock in Good Health Proper location of the poultry house will do much toward keeping a flock healthy. The poultry quarters should be on light, sandy well- drainea soil and should be provided with some shade. The house should face opposite the direction from which storms usually come. Clean, comfortable, well - ven tilated and spacious poultry houses, abundant and nourishing feeds, and clean water in clean receptacles help keep fowls in good physical condition; when these things are pro vided, no medicine is needed to keep poultry well and productive. With out such provisions, no medicinal treatment will insure the mainte nance of'health. It usually pays to kill, not doctor sick hens. New Farm Facts A new apricot developed by Rus sians contains 50 per cent sugar when tree dried. • * • Proper care of tractor this win ter, together with correct adjust ment may mean a saving in fuel of from 13 to 26 per cent next season. Small dried peas, 3,000 years old, taken from the tomb of King Tut ankhamen have been planted in Florida by an army officer and pro duced a good crop. • • . Shortage of certain smaU grain seeds for next year looks possible. Proper handling this year will as sure the farmer of sufficient seeds for planting later on. • • • When ordinary fly sprays have been used in barns or other build ings, avoid breathing the fumes for long periods of time. The fumes are also detrimental to livestock. Calf Vaccination- While calf vaccination for brucel losis is not a substitute for proper management and sanitation, it is recommended by Dr. R. R. Birch of the American Veterinary Medical association. Calfhood vaccination, accompanied by a program of elim ination of reactor animals, has been responsible for the greatest amount of progress in brucellosis control during the past year. The vacci nated calves, however, should be removed from those not vaccinated. Bake Your Christmas Goodies Now! (See Recipes Below) Homemade Gifts Christmas can put a strain on your sugar budget especially if you are baking lots of goodies for your friends. But to day I’m giving recipes that will keep the dents out of the sugar ration and still give plenty of good holiday eating. Sugar savers or substitutes are plentiful in most localities now and answer the need for sweets without sugar. The homemaker can use light and dark corn syrups, honey, dried fruits, etc. If you are giving cookies as gifts, wrap them prettily in small boxes well lined with waxed paper. Cover them in gay Christmas wrappings, and anyone will be happy to get a homemade present from you! Honey, though expensive, will not bring up the price of these cookies which are crispy and well spiced: Honey Crlsples. (Makes 3 dozen) H cup shortening H cup honey 2H cups sifted flour ii teaspoon allspice V4 teaspoon cloves % teaspoon cinnamon % teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon baking soda Boil shortening and honey togeth er 1 minute. Cool. Add sifted dry ingredients. Roll to % inch thick ness and cut in desired shape with cookie cut ter. Sprinkle with colored sugar and bake on a greased baking sheet in a moderate (350-degree) oven. Can died fruit or nuts may also be pressed into the center of the cook ies. Oatmeal has long been a favorite ingredient of cookies. Here the dry ness of the cereal is balanced by the moistness of apricots: •Apricot Oatmeal Cookies. (Makes 70 cookies) 1H cups flour H teaspoon soda 1)4 teaspoons salt % teaspoon nutmeg % teaspoon cinnamon 44 cup shortening 34 cup sugar 1 cup dark corn syrup 1 egg 1 cup mashed, cooked apricots 144 cups rolled oats (uncooked) 34 cup chopped nutmeats Cream shortening and sugar. Add syrup, beat well. Add egg and beat until light and fluffy. Add apricots, oats and nuts; mix thoroughly. Sift LYNN SAYS: % A Bit of Dressing: Varying the dressing in salads helps add inter est to this course. These simple tricks will help: Use lemon juice and sugar for plain lettuce. Or, mix mayon naise with shredded cooked beets, chopp&d hard-boiled egg and pickle relish. For lettuce, cabbage or fruit salads, you’ll like peanut butter blended with rich milk, honey or sugar and salt to taste. To use French dressing for fruit salads, sweeten with honey and add a dash of lemon juice for taste. Sour cream is an ideal dress ing for mixed fresh fruit salads. Add vinegar or lemon juice to sour cream and season with salt and pepper. Chopped apples and sliced bananas may also be added to the dressing. Pour this mixture over the fruit salad, sprinkle with finely chopped nut- meats and top with marashino cherries that have the stems left on. Very pretty, indeed! Christmas Gift Box Suggestions •Apricot Oatmeal Cookies Whole Nuts Candied Fruit •Slices of Regal Pudding Assorted Jellies •Recipes given,. flour with other dry ingredients and add, beating well. Drop by half spoonfuls on greased cookie sheet about 134 inches apart Bake for 15 to 18 minutes in a 375-degree oven. If you frost these ginger cookies with a simple powdered sugar icing, you will have a very dressed up cookie: Soft Ginger Cookies. (Makes 3 dozen) 34 cup sugar 34 cup shortening 1 cup molasses 34 cup sour milk 334 cups sifted flour 1 teaspoon soda 1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon ginger 1 teaspoon cinnamon Cream sugar and shortening and add molasses. Beat well. Sift dry ingredients together and add alter nately to creamed mixture with milk. Let stand several hours in refrigerator. Roll on floured board and cut into desired shapes with cookie cutter. Place on a greased baking sheet and bake for 15 min utes in a pre-heated oven <375 de grees). Thinking about an appropriate pudding for the festivities? Here is an inexpensive one which will serve a large quantity. It has a lot of fruit but re quires no sugar and only a little honey for sweet ening. Serve with a creamy orange sauce, hot •Regal Pudding (Serves 10 to 12) 34 cup shortening 34 cup honey 2 beaten eggs 2 cups chopped dried figs 34 cup chopped dried apricots 34 cup white raisins 1 tablespoon grated lemon rind 1 cup grated carrot 34 cup chopped walnut meats 234 cups flour 1 teaspoon salt 2 teaspoons baking powder 34 teaspoon soda 34 teaspoon nutmeg 44 cup milk Cream shortening; add honey; blend; add eggs. Beat thoroughly. Add fruits, rind, carrot and nut- meats. Sift dry ingredients and add alternately with milk. Pour into a greased and floured 8-inch tube pan and bake in a moderate (350-degree) oven 1 hour and 15 minutes. Serve with the following: Orange Sauce. 3 tablespoons flour 44 cup sugar 34 cup orange juice 1 cup hot water 1 tablespoon grated orange rind 3 tablespoons butter Mix flour with sugar. Add orange juice and hot water. Cook until thick, stirring constantly. Add grat ed orange rind and butter and serve warm over pudding. Oven Tip. When baking fruit puddings or fruit cakes, place a pan containing 2 cups water on the bottom of the oven. This will help give greater volume and shiny, glistening top to either pudding or cake. Making Sauces. Sauces for puddings are best made in double boiler to prevent them from scorching. It will also help keep them warm until time to serve. Get the most from your meat! Get your meat roasting chart from Miss Lynn Chambers by writing to her in care of IFestem Newspaper Union, 210 South Desplaines Street, Chicago 6, III. Please send a stamped, self-addressed envelope for your reply. Released by Western Newspaper Union. IMPROVED UNIFORM INTERNATIONAL S UNDAY I chool Lesson By HAROLD X, LUNDQUIST, D. D. Of The Moody Bible Institute of Chicago. Released by Western Newspaper Union. AND CHECK THE TIRES Otto Klemperer, tall, distinguished looking orchestra conductor, when in the throes of conducting a new composition, has been known to be come extremely preoccupied. One morning, while deep in thought, he entered his favorite bar bershop and took a seat. “Haircut or shave?” cheerily Lesson for December 10 Lesson subjects and Scripture texts se> lected and copyrighted by International Council of Religious Education; used by permission. asked the barber. “Just change the oil,” murmured Klemperer, his thoughts a million miles away. REGULAR MODEL CHRIST IN THE HOME LESSON TEXT—Matthew 19:44: Luke 10:38-42; II Timothy 1:3-6. GOLDEN TEXT—Theze thing! I command you. that ya may love ona another.—John 15:17. The American home faces many enemies and powerful destructive in fluences in our day. At times one wonders whether this most impor tant of all institutions has not 4o far departed from what God intended it to be that it has lost its place and power. In such a time, it is important that the Christian church keep be fore the people, and especially our young people, the Scripture teach ing about the home. We need to revive the old-fashioned home, with its piety, purity and high purpose in the plan of God. We begin right when we note: I. The Plan of God for the Home (Matt. 19:4-6). When Jesus was challenged by the Pharisees, who claimed that a man had a right to divorce his wife, He appealed to Scripture. That Is the sure foundation for right think ing. He referred them to the story of the creation of man and woman in Genesis 2:18-24. There it is re vealed that in all the animal king dom there was no creature suited for fellowship with man. The one who finds full satisfaction in the company of a cat, a dog, or horse, is just not up to normal. Adam must have a “help meet” for him, that is, one suited by per sonality and gifts to be his compan ion. God made woman for that purpose and gave her to man. Thus He established the home and or dained that all through man’s his tory there should be the cdminf together of one man and one woman in that indissoluble union of love (v. 6) which makes the home. We have forgotten God’s law, or have deliberately violated it, and have broken down the home in its very foundation. We had better be gin to think seriously about the di vorce problem if we are not to go the way of other nations. II. The Presence of Christ In the Home (Luke 10:38-42). Christ repeatedly honored the home by His blessed presence. He came to the wedding feast at Cana of Galilee', and there He performed His first miracle (John 2). He should be the unseen guest at every Chris tian marriage. Invite Him, expect Him, honor Him, and He will bless you. One home in particular was a place of rest and refuge for our Lord when He was here on earth, that of His friends, Lazarus, Martha and Mary, in Bethany. He was a welcome guest, always at home in that household. Shall we do less in our households? We see mottoes in homes, “Christ is the unseen guest in this home.” How appropriate! But note that His presence in the home gives Him opportunity to teach and to direCt the life of the home. Mary and Martha had both been busy about the work of the household, but Mary knew when it was time to stop being busy and sit at Jesus’ feet to learn and to be blessed by His presence. She not only worked, but “also sat at the Lord’s feet” (v. 39). Martha went right on working until she was dis tracted, and came to censure her sister. Jones—How many controls has your new radio? Smith—A half dozen! The wife and all the kids! Younger Generation She—How about our going places, big boy? He—-Sorry. Gotta go to bed an’ get some sleep. She—Why? He—Tomorrow’s my tough day. Gotta shave. SeriaUtis Jack—Why do you keep going to the doctor’s. I thought he said it wasn’t necessary. Mac—I’m reading a continued story in one of the magazines in the waiting room. Electronics Teacher—Where is Pittsburgh? Stude—Right between New York and Newark. Teacher—Where did you get that answer? Stude—On our radio! Easier Way Out Woman—I want a divorce. How much will it cost? Lawyer—About five hundred dol lars. Woman—Not for me. I can have him shot for a lot less. Lucky Fellow Brown—I understand Mrs. Jones is suing to have her husband’s will set aside. Blue—Yeah, she can’t seem to realize her husband isn’t alive any more! In Six Easy Lessons Jim—A man offered me $50 a string to stop playing the violin. Jack—Did you stop? Jim—I’ll say. Now I’m learning to play the harp! Sunny England Jones—So you’ra just back from London. How was the weather there? Smith—I dunno. It was so foggy I couldn’t tell. Girl Shy Bill—How do you like stuffed dates? Joe—Not when I have to pay for stuffing them. Same Difference She—You used to catch me in your arms every night, dear. He—Yeah. And now I catch you in my pockets every morning. No Doubt Harry—I wonder who thought of Friday being an unlucky day? Jerry—Oh, some poor fish, I guess! Ask Papa Teacher—How many seasons are there, Isadore? Isadore—Two, teacher. Busy and dull. ONE BIG TROUBLE The answer of Jesus is signifi cant. He did not rebuke Martha, He only told her to get her life into balance. There must be work in a home, but those who make home only a workshop miss its greatest blessing. Home should be a place of sweet fellowship between the mem bers of the family, and especially between them and the Lord. III. The Power of Faith in the Home (II Tim. 1:3-6). Family religion really pays. The home with the family altar, where God’s Word is read as a natural and proper part of daily living, where prayer is made, and God’s good ness is remembered in thanksgiving and praise, that home will send forth children who know the grace of God, and are prepared to heed His call tor service. Timothy had a grandmother and a mother (one wonders where papa and grandpa were) with unfeigned faith. What a precious heritage! That was far more valuable than silver or gold, or farms or comer lots. What heritage are you giving your children? Note the reference to Timothy’s work as a minister of God in verse 6. It was by the Holy Spirit’s call, and was recognized by the church in ordination, the “laying on of hands.” But it is evidently closely connected with that which is spoken of in the verse before—the faith of his home. There is power in that faith to send a boy forth to valiant service for God and to keep him faithful in the day of trial. Give your boy and girl something really worthwhile to remember when they think of home. Put the power of faith in the home back of their lives in public for God. Wifey—You’ve always been a fault-finder, you old grouch! Hubby—Yes, dear, I found you. Some Joke Joe—You’ve got ambitious hair like your father’s. Harry—What do you mean? Joe—It’s sure to come out on top! Close Resemblance Wifey—Why do you persist in re ferring to our folding bed as “he”? Hubby—Well, it shuts up occasion ally, doesn’t it? Smart Girl Stranger—Playing in all that mud, you look pretty dirty, little girl! Miss Moppet—Yes, but I would be prettier if I were clean! Special Privilege Mother—Daughter, why did you let that policeman kiss you? Daughter—It’s against the law to resist an officer! Take Yonr Choice Mrs. Jones—Now that you’ve been married a year, how do you like your husband? Mrs. Smith—Preferably sober! No Improvement Jones—That guy’s a card! He’s a perfect mimic! Smith—Yeah, a jackass couldn’t be more of a jackass! 1J PROTECTS CHAFED SKIN f~5<~L Morolinem WHITE PETROLEUM JELLY J Relief At Last For Your Cough Creomulsion relieves promptly be* - cause it goes right to the seat of the trouble to help loosen and expel germ laden phlegm, and aid nature to soothe and heal raw, tender. In* flamed bronchial mucous mem branes. Tell your druggist to sell yott a bottle of Creomulsion with the un derstanding you must like the way It quickly allays the cough or you are to have your money back. CREOMULSION for Coughs, Chest Colds, Bronchitis When your stomach is qtsessy, un easy and upset, be gentle with it. Take soothing PEPTO-BISMOU It helps to calm and quiet stomach dis tress. Non-laxative. Non-aikaline. Pleasant to the taste. Next time poor stomach is upset, take soothing PEPTO-BISMOL. a Norwich rttoBucr Starts INSTANTLY ta relieva MUSCULAR ACHES-PAINS Soreness and Stiffness For blessed prompt relief — rub oa powerfully soothing Musterole. It actually helps break up painful local i apply i. No • ■"mustard plaster. “No fuss. . with Musterole!" Just rub it on. In3 MUSTEROLE fii aim mki in run it RHEUMATISM neuritis-lumbam MQNEIL'S MAGIC REMEDY BRINGS BLESSED RELIEF Urge Bottled —u um—cl'liS-SmaN Sim » CltTIII: HE lilt It IIIECtn * I IT Ul till me StIKS *> IT IWn linift •! Rkl | Menu mi ei.. tm. Jicisinn.il «. ftnr' STRAINS, SORENESS |£uts, burns A favorite household amtiaeptic dreaa ing and liniment for 98 yeara—Hamford’s BAL3AM OF MYRRH! It contain* soothing gums to relieve the soreness and ache of over-used and strained muscle*. Takes the sting and itch out of burns, scalds, insect bites, oak and ivy poison ing, wind and sun burn, chafing and chapped skin. Its antiseptic action less ens the danger of infection whenever the skin is cut or broken. Keep a bottle handy for the minor casualties of kitchen and nursery. At your druggist—trial sire bottle 35fc household size 651; economy size $1.25. a a HANFORD MFG. OO.. . So/e mmkera of N.Y. £) a,sa 8l-/Mi|rrh Preserve Our Liberty Buy U. S. War Bonds