The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, September 27, 1905, Image 2
DUST IN OUR EYES.
fW> At Time? Collect ( nrloaa Thiaflr*
Without Lookln-f For Them.
Few people nre nwnre, says Fred W.
Hnxby In the Strand Mn-putlne, that
we nre nil constantly "collecting" curi
ous thiugs without looking for them:
In tho very act of looking up at tho
fleeting spectacle of n nery orb the
reader with the big, wide open eyes
may easily receive in ono of hin own
orbs a tiny sphere from nfnr that was
produced in a glowing streak of light
like the one he Is admiring.
Meteoric dust is ever falling and up
on nil parts of our planet. The little
nphcres have been found upon tho
decks of ships far out nt sea, In nil
the deserts of tho earth and on the
tops of snow clad mountains. Dredg
ings brought up from the silent depths
of tho ocean glvo testimony of their
universal prosence. Tho particles all
contain iron and aro easily collected
by the magnet from the roof of any
outhouRe or other placo exposed di
rectly to the sky.
Seafarers aro sometimes petted with
dust of quite a different kind, compos
ed of the microscopic flinty skeletons
of beautiful plants called "diatoms."
These tiny plants live In both salt
nnd fresh water and occur in enor
mous numbers in soino 1centitles. Oc
casionally water courses and inundat
ed areas dry up, and the flinty shells
of the diatoms which grew there are
blown about as dust. Thero are sev
eral instances on record of dlatoma
ceous dust falls at sea. During the
thickest part of the fall tho Bailors
have exporlenccu much pain in their
eyes, the luflnuimatlou being caused
by the little flinty shells.
Almost Too I.nto.
Colonel McSchwartz was telling the
caller how wonderfully tho town had
grown.
"Why, when I moved hero with my
wife nnd daughter twenty-sev"?
"Papa," Interposed Miss McSchwnrtr.,
"there's a mosquito on your neck. Let
mo pinch it off."
"Ouch!" exclaimed tho colonel. "As
I was saying, when wo moved here,
quite a number of years ngo," etc.?
Chicago Tribune.
A DIFFERENCE IN NAME8.
Sonar Order? That Pnaalrri the New
York rieh Dealer.
Tho flsh market man glanced at the
retreating llgure. of a lean, lank cus
tomer and reinnrkcd: "I wish that fel
low would learn to talk United States.
He comes In hore and says. 'Have you
any squlteague?* and after awhile I
find out he wnuts wenknsh. Then one
day he ordered a horse mnckorcl, nnd I
had to send for a Ictlonnry before I
found out that he wanted hluefish.
i Where did he come from? New Eng
land, he says, and culls things by tho
names they do down there.
"Strange that n few miles should
make such a difference in fish names.
Why, when he wants a blacklist) he
calls for tautnug nnd orders quuhungs
when he wants clams. He Is almost
as bad as an Englishman who came
Into n meat market where I workod
once and nnked us if wo had any sa
vory duck, 'llils Is no poultry shop,'
said 1. 'I know It,' replied he. 'Then
why do you ask for duck?' said I.
What do you suppose ho wanted?
Nothing In the world but hog's pluck,
or pig's liver, as tho overreflned call
It."?New York Tress.
Conprriilnn SeM-tlekneer?.
Two congressmen, discussing the dis
comforts of travel, happened to branch
off on to the subject of seasickness.
One of them said:
I "Talk about seasickness, the fellow
that traveled with mo on my last Euro
pean trip beat anything I evor met In
nil of my experience before. I tried nil
sorts of remedies ou him, but without
avail. He kept repeating, 'Oh, I am so
sick, I am so sick.'
"Finally I cried out, 'Can't you keep
anything on your stomach?'
" 'Only my hands, Tom, only my
hands.' "?Harper's Weekly.
Mn'rlmonr nnd Theology.
Matrimony should end all doctrinal
quibbles. If the man happen to be
born a pagan and the woman some
thing else, let them compromise their
differences and become, both of them,
of the same faith. l*et them cast lots
if there be no other way.?From "The
Bishop's Niece," by George H. Picard.
STAGE REALISM.
Why Jo* Jefforaom Didn't Hat? m
Ken i Dog 8ohntM?r.
It wos tho prlvllego of tho writer
years ngo to attend a reception at
which Joseph Jefferson spoke on the
drnma. Ills treatment of tho subject
was Interesting, the utterance of a
man who know tho art of which he
spoko. But tho most Interesting part
of tho hour came after the completion
of the formal address, when an oppor
tunity was given to the audience to
ask any questions they wished of Mr.
JefferHon. Soon the familiar topic was
introduced, tho effect of tho modern
elaboration and realism In stage set
ting. Mr. Jefferson at once rose to the
question. He spoke somewhat rapidly,
with n quaint humor and sympathetic
charm that were Irresistible. He clmr
ncterticd the modern fashion of Stage
Hctt.iig as "a tribute to the weakness
of the human Imagination." "I am of
ten naked," he went on, "why I do not
have a real dog Schneider. But If I did
none of you woulu l?o satisfied. You
would go home saying, 'Well, Schnei
dtr never looked like that dog!' You
love Schneider because you have made,
him out of a piece of ynr.r own heart.
And then," meditatively, "If I bad a
real Schneider some one In the gallery
would probably whistle to him at the
critical moment, and he would hark
and spoil tho play. While if he know
his part perfectly and did Just what
(Schneider ought to do"?pausing and
with his delightful smile -"Schneider
would bo the hero and not Itlp!" Then,
with a twinkle of the eye, he summed
up the wholo matter with the quiet re
mark, "Realism with a tall to wag lu
the wrong place Is a dangerous thing."
-New York Post.
Comtnjr Around.
Mrs. Cuff roy?And how Is that pret
ty young widow? Is sho reconciled to
her loss yet? Mrs. Malaprop?No, she
nhVt exactly reconciled yet, but they
do say she's got tho man picked out.
And Wnr Continued.
Miss Goodley -Hess says she's ready
to make up If you are. Miss Cutting
Tell her I'd be ready to make up too
If I had a complexion as muddy as
hers.?Philadelphia Ledger.
Does Appearance
Count With You?
Do you desire that exclusive quality in tailoring attained only by big city
style creators who are in touch with the newest ideas in fabrics and fashions?
This indescribable element of style, richness and exquisite taste is
shown in every garment we produce.
We are an extensive and well-known firm of merchant tailors, making
to measure only, with representatives all over the country.
The scope of our business permits the carrying of a stock of more than
500 varieties?the newest importations and the highest grade of domestic
goods. It also permits the employment of expert cutters and tailors. Cut,
fit and finish are irreproachable.
If you desire the highest quality of tailoring service at moderate price,
it will pay you to investigate the Hays System?the "Modern Method."
Our new Fall and Winter styles in suitings and overcoatings are
unusually attractive.
If we have no representative in your city, write us direct.
L. E. HAYS & CO., Cincinnati, Ohio.
Hard, Soft or Shop
COAL
Brick and
Draying
Wanted?1,000 Cords of Oak and
Pino Wood on cars your station or
delivered at Laurens.
J. W. Eichelberger.
Laurens, S. C. 'Phone H. Terry's
Charleston & Western Carolina Railway.
(Schedule in effect April 16, 1906.)
No. 2
Daily
Lv Laursns 1:60 pm
Ar Greenwood 2- 46 41
Ar Augusta 5:20 44
Ar Anderson 7:10 "
No. 42
Daily
Lv Augusta 2:35 pm
ArAllendale 4:30 "
Ar Fairfax 4:41 44
Ar Charleston 7:40 "
Ar Beauford 6:30 14
Ar Port Royal 6:40 44
Ar Savannah 6:45 "
Ar Waycross 10: 00 44
No.i
Daily
Lv Laurens 2:07 pm1
Ar Spartanburg 3:30 44
No. 62 No. 87
Daily Ex. Sudday
Lv Laurens 2: 09 pm 8: 00 am
Ar Greenville 3:25 44 10:20 44
Arrivals:?Train No. 1, Daily, from
Augusta and intermediate stations 1: 45
pm; No. 52, daily, from Greenville and in
termediate stations 1:35pm; No.87,daily,
except Sunday, from Greenville and
intermediate stations 6: 40 pm; train No.
2, daily, from Spartanburg and interm
ediate stations 1: 30 p m.
C. H. Gasque, Agt., Laurens, S. C.
G. T. Bryan GenM Agt. Greneville S.C.
Ernest Williams, Gen. Pass. Agt.,
Auguata, Ga,
T. M. Emerson, Traffic Manager.
Times in South Carolina are Showing Itself in Fleecy Cotton Staple
at 10 cts per pound and a bright outlook for higher heights in the
near future, in the face of all this we now own our stocks of
Merchrndise on a basis of 7^cts cotton which we will give our
customers the benefit of in this season's Goods. We have
Worth of General Merchandise now Ready for Your Inspection consisting of Clothing, Hats, Caps, Shoes, Hosiery, Underwear, Pants, Shirts,
Collars, Cuffs, Ties, Suspenders, Work Shirts, Overalls, Dry Goods, Millinery, Ribbons, Laces, Embroideries, Dress Goods, Flannels, Jeans'
Calicoes, Ginghams, Bleached Muslins, Ticking, Cheviots, Plaids, Sea Islands, Shirtings, Drills, Curtain Scrim, Counterpanes, Quilts, Blankets, Window Shades Lace
Curtains, Curtain Poles, Table Covers, Pillow Shams, Handkerchiefs, Gloves, Umbrellas, Towels, Napkins, Chair Tidies, Bureau and Mantle Scarfs, Crepe Paper, Sta
tionery, Jewelry, Watches, Clocks, Spectacles, Silverware, Cutlery for Table and Pocket, Ladies' Underskirts and Dress Skirts, Jackets and Cloaks. Full Line of
Standard Patent Medicines, Notions and Novelties, Laundry Soaps, Toilet Soaps. Perfumes, Brushes, Ball Cotton and Spool Cotton, Etc. ------
Don't Hiss Seeing Bargains in the Basement!
Tin, Glass, Crockery, Chinaware, Enameledware, Lanterns, Lamps, Earthware, Novelties and Racket Goods, Trunks, Suit Cases, Table Oil Cloth, Buggy
and Team Whips, Rugs, Matting, Art Squares 9x12 feet, Wall Paper, Bibles and Testaments, Sugar, Coffee, Rice, Soap, Soda, Hatches, Baking Powders,
Gold Dust, Cigars, Chewing Tobacco, Candy, Chewing Gum. Visit our Store, Inspect our Stock. We have Nine Sales People now ready to wait
on you, and if it should be necessary we will put on nine more to wait on you. Come, bring the whole family along and see through Bargaindom.
Six Special Bargain Days Each Week at Burns' Famous Department Store
Red Iron Racket
WHOLESALE AND RETAIL