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TRI WEEKLY EDITIG' WINNSBORO. S.C. MAY 8, 1900, ESTABLISHED 1844. ASIGN OF SPRINGv t( When skies are dull and dreary, h And spring seems far away, There cones a token cheery ve, p To ease the sad delay, I hPard the sounds et laughing. Which seemed 'rill sighs to grope; p The tones of childish chafing a While TMy jumped the rope. t] -1er voice is far from mellow: t She wears a gingham gown; Her hair in braids of yellow Goes bobbing up and down, ibut eveyry tone she utters Thrli3 with a vernal hope, t No more the ice-wind mutters c When Tilly jumps the rope. Be joeund! Spring is nearing. 0 The omens do not fail. 0 The wind is southward veering. The breeze supplants the gale. - The sunshine's golden fingers Caress the meadow slope; The sparrow cn!rps an. lingers 0 And Tilly jumps the rope. -Washington Star. t 00000000000000 0 t BY GEORGE GIBES. C 0 SSING with the young of ficers of Com modore Pre- I ble's squad- t ron before Tripoli there I was a tall, dark, melan choly looking t fellow of' V about twenty- t five. His name was Richard Somers, and his command was the Nautilus, a little t schooner of twelve guns and a hun dred men. He had been, with Deca tur and Stewart, a junior officer or Commodore Barry's United States in t one of the wars in the last century, a and the friendship formed in those early days had been cemented by a score of thrilling adventures. The difference in their tempera- t ments was marked. Decatur was bold, s dlomineering and impetuous. SomersA was quiet, mild, and ever avoided the el which Decatur too often ght. But under the quiet exterior en had found a will like iron and the t willingness to dare and do anything that caie within the province of his profession. In the old days on the United States there happened an affair which imme iately established his reputation as .officer and a man. At first he was 1kaoi understood. His brother midship- t - non, mistaking th.- reserve of his t rfor weakness, did not hesitate, s re they had been aboard with him 1 take advantage of him in i e ySomers stood it for a while am silence. As the weeks went by and the bantering continued, Somers be ae more and more quiet and self contained. Decatur, ever humorous and mis chief-making, had himself been one of t the worst to chaff his comrhde, but he know what Somers's silence meant, and he desisted. Somers went about his duties quiet ly, nevcr giving a sign that there was anything upon his mind until the day 1 before coming into port. Then he went to Decatur and said; "Stephen. to-morrow I want you to go ashore with me, for I am going toh 4 meet three men." The next afternoon a cutter contain-~ ing Somers, Decatur and three mid 'shipmen with their seconds went. ashore and found a secluded spot upon 1 the beach where they would be free -from interference. Somers had chal lenged all three to fight, and was to, tak~e them in su'ccession.] 4 In the first two duels Somers re ceived two shots in the body. The latter caused him to sink upon the sand, as though dangerously hurt; but he rallied quickly and, seeing that the third midshipman was standing wait Sing to see if the battle could be con tinued, tried to struggle to his feet. He found he could not get up, and De-K catur offered to take his place and re ceive the fire of the third midship man. But Somers, though suffering greatly, was not to be deterred, and bade Decatur prop him up in sitting posture, in which position he ex changed shots with the third man. Fortunately none of the injuries re sulted fatally, and in a few weeks Somers was on deck again. He went* about his duties as before, but never after that did they call him a milksop. .It was Somers who led one division of the gunboats to attack the Tripoli tan fleet while Decatur was leading the other. Finding that he could not _- -ieaoh-them by the eastern entrance, he sailed into the northern entrance of the-harbor, and, single-handed, boldly sent his little vessel into the midst of five of the enemy. His gunboat was smaller than any one of those of his adversaries, but so well was his long gun served and so true was the fire of his musketry that not one of them succeeded in getting alongside of him to board. They were all bearing straight down upon the rocks, and Somers could not spare enough men from the guns to man his sweeps. But Preble, on the: Constitution, saw his danger and, coniing up in time, sent a broadside of grape among the pirates, who got out their sweeps and retreated when one united attack would have made the victory theirs. As they drew oft; instead of return ing to the Constitution, as Preble wished, Somers pursued them until1 within .ess than a cable's length of a twelve-gun battery, which had not fred before for fear of damaging the< feigTripolitans. When she opened< fire at this close range the destruction inevitable; but''by a lucky chance a bombard exploded in the battery.. blew up the platform,. and drove the< Tripolitans to cover. While tes many attacks were be ing madei upon the gurboSats and bat-,2 I1 ries, the latrepid, in which Decatn ad recaptured and destroyed the hiladelphia, was being rapidly pre ared as a fireship. The plan was to >ad her with a hundred barrels of owder in bulk, with bags of grape. ad solid shot, and, under cover of ie night, explode her in the midst of ie Tripolitan war vessels. Somers,* ho had been frequently in the har or of Tripoli, and knew its rags and. cks so well that he coul( readily iread his way through the narrow hannels, asked for the command. I It was an honor that half a dozen ther men sought, and not until the Id Commodore had weighed the hances fully did he at last agree to At Somers go. Before consenting, 'reble repeatedly warned the young: ficer of the desperate character of le work, and told him that on accoun , f the Napoleonic wars the Tripoli ans were short of ammunition, and f hat so much powder must not fall i ato the hands of the enemy. But p omers needed no warning. A day d ,r two afterward, when the prepara- tl ions were nearly completed, Preble lS ,nd some other officers were trying a S use in the cabin of the Constitution; fr ne of the officers, watch in hand, w entured the opinion that it burned T Do long, and might enable the enemy put it out before it exploded the e iagazine. Hearing this, Somers said s nietly: n "I ask no fuse at all." tl When volunteers were called for, it be desperateness of the enterprise a1 ,as fully explained, but the crew of Le Nautilus, Somers's own vessel, I topped forward to a man. Midship- h iau Henry Wadsworth (an uncle of n he poet Longfellow) was chosen as d econd in command. Midshipman a oseph Israel, having vainly pleaded a ith Somers to be allowed to go, at Nv lie last moment smuggled himself t, board the Intrepid, and, when dis- a overed, Somers had not the heart to end him back. As soon as the night fell, the In- s eepid cast off her lines and went h lowly up toward the harbor. The c rgus, Vixen and the Nautilus fol- b )wed her, and shortly afterward ii Itewart, on the Siren, became so anx- t aus that he followed, too. A haze N hat had come up wl -i the sun went a own hung heavily over the water, r ad soon the lines of the fireship be- s' ame a mere gray blur against the 8 ark coast-line beyond. I Midshipman Ridgley, on the Nauti- e is, by the aid of a powerful night- b lass aloft, managed to follow her un- f3 Il she got well within the harbor, and b [Len she vanished. The suspense ti on became almost unbearable, for a ot a shot had been fired, and not a u ound "came from the direction in 'clock a half-dozen cannon shots a ould be plainly heard, and even the a nowledge that she had been discor- h ed and was being fired on was a re ief from the awful silence. About n en o'clock Stewart was standing at t he gangway of the Siren with Lieuten- m nt Carrol, when the latter, craning s is neck out into the night, suddenly 0 mclaimed, "Look! See the light!" p Away up the harbor Stewart Iaw a' peck of light as from a lantern which~ I noved rapidly as though it were be-'I nv carried by some one running along t ideck. Then it paused and disap. o >eared from viewv. In a second a tre- I nendous flame shot up hundreds of' eet into the air, and the glare of it fi vas so intense that it seemed closey bord. The flash and shock were soy tpendous that the guardships, t hough far out to sea, trembled and b hivered. a That was all. The officers and the: a nen looked at one another in mute a iorror. Could anything have lived in c he area of that dreadful explosion? l ['he tension upon the men of the little a eet was almost at the breaking point. I The vessels beat to and fro between' u he harbor entrances, firing rocket' i ud guns for the guidance of possibleA ugitives. All night the fleet kept c igil, but not a shot, a voice or even' t splash came out from the harbor. With the first streaks of dawn the ~mericans wvere aloft with their:a lasses. On the rocks at the northernd utrance through which the Intrepid t: id passed they saw a mast and frag- s nents of vessels. One of the enemy's t agest gunboats had disappeared andn wo others were so badly shattered il hat they lay upon the shore for re >airs. I The details of the occurrence were x ever actually known, but it is hought that Somers, being laid a aoard by three gunboats before actu. ily in the midst of the shipping, and eeling himself overpowered, fired his agazine and destroyed himself and c As own men in his avowed purpose 2t to be taken by the enemy. ti Thus died Richard Somers, Henry i Wadsworth, the Midshipman, Josephk [srael and ten American seamen,whose f< >ames have been inscribed on the b Kary's roll of fame.-Saturday Even.- t] .ng Post. The Bull attd the Cyclist. From Texas comes a report of a hi- 1 syclist who got mixed up with an etive bull to the rider's physical ir ury and e verlastingechagrin, He car- i ~ied one of those old-fashioned bicycle ja orns on his handle bar instead of a ell. He overtook a large herd o1 attle on a back road, and, aftec sev-' ral vain attempts to work his way f :hrough them, he gave a loud blast on f, :he horn. There was an instant comn notion in the herd, and the immense ull at the head of the column paused and turned to listen. There was ight in his eye as he sought the causer >f what he probably fancied to be a j hallenge from sonme rival of the )lains. Unfortunately the cyclist f ooted his tooter again, and the bullj nade a mad charge at him, goring t mini horribly and wreeking his mna hine. It was with diliculty that the nan was rescued and carried into j [a~llr where 1:e was piaced in the 1 moseal-.New York Press, TALES OF PLUCK . AND ADVENTURESK Terrible Crawl For Safety. HIS very modest account of what A must have been an -1 extremely hazard ous undertaking, with most severe suffering attend ing it-the horror of the dark night and the prowling mountain I i o n s addiug to the aw ilness of the situations-gives one an lea of the courage required in pros ecting for gold in Colorado, and the anger encountered by the hunter in ie lonely mountain places of the outhwest. It was sent to friends in t. Louis by Mr. Clyde Hitchcock om the mining camp in Colorado, here he is wintering with friends. he story is told in his own language: "While at Del Norte we procured tough hickory timber for one pair of iow shoes and red spruce enough to ake another. The hickory cost irty cents per foot. Just think of ! We wanted one good pair of such toes at least, so that we may have no tore accidents such as I had on my ay home from our last hunt. But I aven't told you about that. I re ained down at the Halfway House a ay longer than the rest of the party, s I hated to give up without getting deer. Next morning I left the Half ay House at about 9.30, walked elve miles uphill to Summitville, rriving there at 2.10 p. in. "T took two hours' rest ond then arted for the camp on my sBow 1oes, made of pine. As it gets "'ark ere now a little atter 5 p. m. I hadn't overed more than half the distance efore it was pitch dark. After cross ig South Fork 'hiere is a steep hill > climb up through the timber. Ibile going up that hill one of my now shoes broke squarely in two. I alized right away that I was in bad ape, as I was tired out when I arted and had a gun to carry to boot. didn't regret having.the gun, how ver, for the mountin lions have een seen in that vicinity recently. I rst tried getting along on one shoe, t that wouldn't work, for every ime I took a step with the foot minus shoe I would plunge int6 the snow p to my hips. "I then cut the other shoe off, now-shoe pole to rest my hands- on, d started for camp on my hands and nees. In that way I wouldn't sink o deep into the snow. With two ilos ahead of me I felt this at least > be a discouraging method of loco totion, but in it lay t'he only hope of aving myself. I was so nearly fagged at when I started that I was com elled to rest every rod or so. If you avent an idea what a fearful task I ad on my hands and knees crawling tboriously through the deep snow in e dark, try passing over a half mile f bare ground on your hands and nees. "After leaving the timber I began ring off the rifle. About every 200 'ards I would fire two shots to see hether I could wake any one up in e camp, but not a sound could I ar except the echo of my own rifle ot. Thea I would grit my teeth d start on again. Nor did I get an swer until I was within 100 ya rds of r cabin. Then I turned the old gun ose, just to see if any one was still live within. When almost home Mr. etterman came down and helped me p the hill, aud the Lord knows I eded his help. I learned then that udrew was visiting at the Chambers ain, and that Mr. Fetterman was e only person at home, and as he id not know what to make of the ooting, he became s'omewhat timid bout investigating the cause. I an't suffecr much with the cold, as e exercise of crawling through the nw kept me warm, with the excep o of my feet and hands. My Ger nn socks and overshoes were frozen ito solid pieces, but I wore a thin air ol socks inside of them, and they aved my feet. My hands I could aaage better. We depend now on owshoes made of hickory, and spruce udl pine no0 more.' Striking Incident of the War. "To see a squad of nine naked men oss a stream on a small raft and ri out an intrenched force or ten ies their number in broad daylight, hiere their number mu~st soon become own. is something not soon to be rgotten. History does not relate a raver or more striking incident of ie war. This description of a small detail of mrican troops charging upon an en y four times their number and cap iring trenches, while the Americans cr clad in an undress uniform not vided for In the army regulations, taken from a report just received the WXar Department frem the 'bilippines. The report is made by Captain 'J. P. ~atcellor, of the Twenty-fourth In intry, on the results of an expedition om San Nicholas to Aparri, in juzon. Catain Batchellor had orders to ross the mountains of southern Ben net and prevent the insurgents from etreating into the valley of tce Rio ~rade de Kagayan. The troops cr "to live upon the country," a iilitary phras3 which means that the oldiers were to forage for every ing. Captin Batchellor had with him ieutenant Castner, commanding the: 4omes scouts, andl Lieutenants Mc laster and Miler, of the Twenty-4 2,,.t, Inary. Twan anndr4 wi.J tes and a 'pack train made up the olumn. The command marched linety miles in six days. There was fight with the elusive Filipino ou tearly every one oi the six days. Con. erning the march Captain Batchello' ays: "By the sixth day the men were nostly barefooted, their shoes having >cen cut to pieces. There was a hot ight at Fuerte San Luis, and then :ame the successful and certainly re narkable attack on the insurgents at saguilan. The remnants of this part >f Aguinaldo's army were strongly in ;renched beyond the San Luis River, i wide mountain creek. "Lieutenant McMasters asked per nission to swim the river with some nen of Company H. "The men stripped and crossed the iver, some swimming singly and oth ,rs with horses. All arms were lost, owever, in the struggle jarth e-water. Dorporal John H. Johnson was Irowned, sinking without asking for 2elp, for fear he would delay hiz omrades." "Lieutenant McMasters sat down n the bank," continues Captain Batchellor, "and ordered three men t ;o back for arms. Sergeant Wilcox ani ;wo men, with b amboo poles, shelte) :ents and canteen straps,: fixed up a razy sort ->f a raft." ' The insurgents were firing at them meanwhile, the bullets zipping around hem. When the raft was completed' Lieutenant Miller, Sergeant Wilcox nd one man succeeded in recrossing. rhey got the arms, but, in the mean while the insurgents wer'-popping iway at them from ti'eir trenches, and lthough Company A had arrived on the opposite bank and was attempting to ferry men across the river to Lieu tenant McMasters's aid, the process was too slow. As a last resort Lieu. tenant McMasters mustered his sevea aked infantrymen, and, moving %round, he struck the insurgents on the left, driving them out of their trenches, through the town and into the jungle. "I saw Uiller and two naked men," :oncludes Captain Batchellor, "charge the main trench, from which forty in surgents ran out." Sailor Adamson's Ttescue. A tale of adventure and rescue thai is like a leaf from the most excitin2 pages of the nautical novelists is told by those on board the British shir Glennesslin, whic. recently arrived at Honolulu. Last Sunday morning, at 2 o'clock, William Adamson, one of the sailors, was washed overboard f0om the b",w anchor chains. Though it was pitch dark at the time an ie vessel wa making nine 4nots ( stormy seg stroke and was in r or an hour, he is now sa, Uhip, none the worse for his ex er ee. HiS rescue was due to the deti ion of Captain Pritchard to wake e , y possible effort to save the man, and t the brave work of a rescue crew ol volunteers in the ship's lifeboat. CapA tain Pritchard gives the followjfugac count of the incident. "I had just gone to fed, leaving the mate in charge 'of that deck, when I hea d the cry of 'Man 'overboard.' A fresh wind was blowing with a nasty head sea and we were making about nine knots an hour. I rushed on the poop~ and was told by the steersman that lho had thrown a life buoy, he thought pretty near where the man was. i. re duced sail an ddrove the ship to the wind at once and in avery short time, though it was night. I had a lifeboat equipped and provisioned hanging to the davits. I consulted the officers and some of the men and found that the lost sailor could not swim a stroke, and all surmised that he was dro wne d. But I was not going to leave without an attempt to save him if he was still afloat. So I wore ship and sailed back to the place whore he had fallen over, as near as I could. I called for volunteers to man the life. boat and a crew came forward, led by the steward, William Griffin. I set all hands to watch and listen for the missing man. "The lifeboat was immediately lost sight of in the darkness, but from time to time we could hear the vcices of the men till the sound died away. A right rescue is differelit from one in the (day. There is something dread fsl about leaving a ship at night in a small boat. After an anxious wait I was rewarded by hearing three faint cheers from the direction in which the boat had gone. The sounds were beard by no one else, but soon the boat returned, guided by rockets and blue lights whsich we were sending up, and bringing the rescned man." IlescuedI by a Woman. Andrew Swaney, Deputy Sheriff of Flathead County, a former member of the First Mont:"a Volunteers, had a miraculous escape from death a few days since. His life was saved by the heroism of a woman. Swaney, in serv ing some papers in the Clark investi gating case at Washington, ha d crossed Swan Lake on the ice in the morning, driving a double team. Returning in the evening, he agai'n tried to cross the lake, when without warning the ice gave way, precipitating horses, carriage and driver it' fourteen feet of water. Mrs. David Carpenter, who heard Swaney's cries for help, appeared just as one of the horses had pulled the Deputy Sherigf under the water. Swaney clung to the horse's leg and rose to the surface with the horse. Mrs. Carpenter lay flat upon the ice and after a tedious struggle managed to get Swaney out. Bot~h horses were drowned. Live Stock in Sahara. TM Sahara is not a barren waste, as is p paiarly supposed. Not long ago there were 9,000,0)00 sheep, 2,000,000 goats --.d 260J,000 camelY 'the Alger ian Sahara alone; and t sea furn ib a msiUioni and a half e-palms. "APPL. SAYINGS." the King of Fruits Was Not Always in the High Favor It Now Is. Apples were at one tima underesti mated, says a writer in Youth's Com panion; they were scarcely considered a fruit rare enough for the considera tion of the epicure, unless, indeed, they formed a part of some elaborate dessert, compounded and cooked by a skilled housekeeper. Apple jellies, puddings, pies and cakes might do, but plain raw apples were fit only for school children, vegetarians or the poor. All this is now changed, and the apple has come to its own again. But if its flavor has been at various times slightly esteemed or discredit ed, at least its wholesomeness has been steadily recognized. "Apple sayings" are frequent, both in our country and in England, all of which testify in favor of the fruit. In the "west coonntree" there are four such: An apple a day Sends the doctor away, is the first and briefest. Then follow, in the order of their vigor, three mores Apple in the morning, Doctor's warning. Roast apple at night, Starved the doctor outright. Eat an apple going to bed, Knock the doctor on the head. A little less aggressive is one of the Midlands: Three each day, seven days a week Ruddy apple, ruddy cheek. Bat more interesting than these is an old orchard verse which used tobe recited on certain ancient farms on the plucking of the first ripe apples of the crop. Misfortune was supposed to follow its omission, and its utter. ance was quite a little ceremony, the first apple over which it was spoken being presented to a young girl, whc halved and bit it before any farther fruit was gathered, or at least tested. Thus it ran: The fruit of Eve receive and cleave. And taste the flesh therein; A wh Aesome food, for man 'tis good That once for man was sin. And since 'tis sweet, why, pluck and eat, The Lord will have it so; For that which Eve did grieve, believe Hath wrought its all of wog Eat the apple! WISE WORDS. No just law harms the law-abiding. Manly work grows out of child-like faith. True patriotism always begins at home. Constant confession is the secret o! constancy. Restraint is the secret of happinesi in pleasure. Regeaerations is the only cure foi The time you spend with your chil. dren is never wasted. * Men may save money but money will never save them. The man who does not know is al % the- readiest to tell. tlumes for the flow of mercy. The knowledge of sin does not al ways lead to its acknowledgement. The man who is but an echo in th eity may be a voice in the wilderness The advantages of good habits ar as great as the disadvantages of ba ones. He who buys popularity at the pric of character is robbing the world o manhood. If the stars went out of business be cause they were not suns the nigh would be drear.-Ram's Horn. Character in tihe Tongue. IGlossomnanciecis a new "science" iu troduced by a Miss Erbere No, o Paris, consisting of reading the char actar by the form and size of th tngue. The guiding principles ar as follows: If the tongue is long iti an indication of frankness; if it i short, of dissimnulation; if is is broad of expansiveness; if narrow, of con centration. When the tonguei both long and large it implies that th possessor is a great gossip, frank t disagreeable:::iss and thoughtless. I the tongue buu long and narrow. it owner is only half-frank, thinking a much as is uttered but not always ut tering all that is thought. If the tongue be short and broad, therei promise of plenty of gossip-and false hoods; it talks a great deal, bat say little of what is really thought. I short and narrow it indicates dee1 cunning and lying; imnpenetrabilit; and great prudence. This tongue be lngs to those persons always read; to make mistakes but eager to inspir confidence. So, then, not the physic'an alonei to be guided by the tongue, but be fore vou become intimate with any oe, ask him or her to put out his o her tongue, that you may be certai whether they are to be trusted or not Pacific Tidal Waves. A tidal wave was seen lately at Vic toria and along the North Pacifi coast, doubtless caused b~y one of th many earthquakes that afflict Japan Fishermen on the river in boat noticed soon after noon a series o waves coming into the river, increas ing the volume of water considerably The waves continued to grow unti they became dangerous. Between:i nd 3 o'clock they were from three t< six feet high. The disturbance laste< all the afternoon, but graduall; diminished by 6 o'clock. A numbe of the largest waves were timed. an< it was found that they came about mile apart and traveled a mile it three minutes. News is received fron Honolulu that the western coast e Hawaii was visited by tidal wav'es o great force about the same time. A Keanhou the water reached point: thirty-five feet above the sea. Th shocks of the earthquake were, it ap pears, registered by instruments i' Italv THE MERRY SIDE OF LIFE, STORIES THAT ARE TOLD BY THE FUNNY MdN OF THE PRESS AUore Desirable-No Longer a Mystery Not Such a Loss-Another Supersti tion Punctured-An Accurate Conjec ture-Help Wanted, Etc., Etc. She tells me that an EnEglish lord She never means to wed, And whyphe thus makes up her mind Most plainly must te read. Instead of one who drops his "h," This maiden hard ta please Would muh pret.er a yankee swain Who likes to drop Us "v's." -.Tudge. No Longer a Mystery. "I have discovered that Bunks is thoroughly unreliable." "Then you know just what you can rely on."-Chicago Record. Not Such a Lots. She-"Borrowby can't dine with us to-morrow. His father-in-law hqs just died. What a sad loss!" He-"The loss is :ully covered by insurance."--Life. Another Superstition P'unctured. "Horseshoes bring good luck, it is said." "Did you ever have your wifo take a fancy to a gold one act with dia monds?" An Accurate Conjecture. Minister-"What do you think of that, Jane?" That couple only gave me a dollar for marrying them!" Wife-"Well. I k:iew the moment they came in they had both been married before!"-Pack. Help Wanted. Mistress-"How did you happen to let the fire go cat?" New Girl-"I'm sure I don't know, ma'am, unless you happened to forget to tell me to pat cot.1 on."-Chicago Ne ws. Just Bis style. :Dudeleigh-"It may be the latest style and all that, but, ah, I don't think it quite suits ny head." Hatter-"Ah! Let me show you some of these soft hats."-Chicago News. The Price of at Umbrella. Tomkins-"That's a handsome um brella you've got theve, Gibbs." "Yes, Tomkins." "About what does t cost to carry an umbrella like that?" "Eternal vigilance." Fares lHetter Tba-2 His Master. "What do you feed your dog?" "He lives on the 'at of the, W Nothing that the neighbors can lur ish is any too good for him. The fact is, he lives Uk uhan -we do." 'Clerelaud Plain Dealer. Words and Phrases. "My reason was almost 4ethroned by the excitement." That is an unre s Sion.say that your rea ou w as alm ost gerrym andered out o office. "-Chicago Record. A Place to Avoid. Walker Round - "That's a nice house; let's git somethin' to eat in there." Old Hand-"Not at all, me boy. The lady w'at runs it keeps a cookin' school."-Detroit Free Press. Willing to Becomie a Victim. Willite's Mamima-"Too much pastry is not good. for people. Poor Unce George, who was very fond of it, diet from the all'ests of an internal growth.' Little Willie-"Was it a pie planu, ma?"-Phxiladelphia Record. A Conversational Artist. IShe-"Tom called Easel a conver sational artist." He-" Why, I thought he was portrait painter?" I"So he is; but 'he makes speaking likenesses, you know. "-Yonkert Statesman. Again the Fatal Number. "How many girls caid you make loy to before you met me?" demande< Vick-Seun, at the close of hcr long tirade. "Twelve!" groaned her husband "But I never counted~ themn up unti it was too late!" An Unconventicit ali Centnry. -"The first century began with the year one; the second ..entury with th< Iyear one hundred aud one, and s< on." "Admitting that, wvhy should thi -twentieth century be bound by preee dents?"-Pack. lisually tihe Case. Timkis-"But is your income sul ficient to justify you :n marrying?" Simkis-"I'm afraid not." -ITimkins-"Then what reason hayi Iyou for taking such a step?" Simkins-"I h ave nto i-easlon at all I'm in love. "-Chicago News. The Femninine Standard. "What is your waist measure? asked her dearest friend. "Really, I've forgotten," repilies the demure little maiden. For a mc mnt she was burica in thoughi fThen, turning to her escort, sh asked: "Harold, how long is a man's arn ayway?"-Chicago :Post. A Young Strattegist. Freddie (whose pa is a strict dis Sciplinarian)- 'Ma, can you have rman arrested if you :hink he's goin to kill you?" L .~-"Certainly, nmy son. Freddie-"Then I m going to gi out a warrant for pa.' Ma-"You shock me, Freddie What reason could y~m possibly has for any such action against yotm father?" Freddie-"Why, I heard him te the lumberman this miorning to brir Shim a cartload of s'ainglep."-Ricl and IDisnateh. HOUSEHOLD MAT ILK** A Lanp Crame. The craze for lamps of* every de4 scription has led to the utilization of almost every old piece of silver or pottery in one's possession. Even water-coolers have been called into play; but the extreme of bad taste has been reached when the reservnir of the lamp is shown resting on top of a vased intended for flowers, and fitting so badly es to look as though a careless jolt would send the whole affair over. A lamp is altogether a failure when it' does not suggest stability, and the in genions housekeeper or decorator has missed a good point when, in strain ing aftcr novelty, all sense of fitness has been lost. rroper Way to Lay the Tablecloth. If tablecloths are handled carefully when laying and removing them, a con siderable item will be cut from the laundry bill, besides giving the table a much better appearance. After a meal the tablecloth always should b laid away in its own folds. It keeps it smoother and enables one to handle it better in laying it the next.tim. When ready to do so unfold the table cloth down the entire length on the table, taking care to put the fold thai marks the centre 'of the width down the centre of the table. When that is ready unfold the tablecloth in the width, and it will be sure to hang evenly without any pulling about to make it straight. Shelve* For China. A cl !ver idea has been carried into effect in a New York house, says Har per's Bazar. Narrow shelves three inches wide have been put on the ja which forms the frame of the bay win-. dow. These 'shelves are enclosed in glass with leaded panes. The glass might be omitted when economy must be practised. One set of these shelves is fitted with cups And saucers, the' other with bits of silver, old spoons, porringers and small pitchers. A window seat runs around the bay. The two side sashes have been trans formed into a window garden of ferns,. like those built out of many houses. Only the central sash has been left free, since fro:n that point only is there a good vie v. When one does not want window seats flowers might be put on shelves running from the floor up to the win dow panes, so that the small ferneries are made to seem part of a plan ex tending up fron the floor, and all green. On the central pane, if the view is lbad, coats of armr and other designs might be stencil or e placed, the aim light %u shelf might brass jar holding a branch-something its arm over the break the line. manl Md.L r 'ttle daughter is about to move from the nursery into a roota of her own here are a few suggstio aa to its furniture: Have a dotted Swiss curtain at th window, tied back with forget-me-not blue ribbons. Let the little bedstead be painted with white enamel an4 draped with a canopy of white Swiss, through which a blue silk lining should show. The bureau, which must correspond in size to the bed, should also be white, and, if one's bank account will allow it, decorated IThe latest washstand for a child's room is of willow, painted in white, - with a deep hollow in the center to - hold the dainty bowl and pitcher. In this room all the appointments of the washstand should be of white china, strewn with forget-me-nots. In the corner of the room have a baby diva! covered with light blue chintz and banked with white linen-covered pile lows, ornamented with a blue silk frill. A little willow rocking chair is another requirement. It should be. painted in white and have the seat cshioned in light blue plush. Cover the walls with a paper which looks like a pompadour silk. It may be cream white in color striped with lines of forget-me-nots. Hare plenty of pictures on the walls, and a carpet of blue felt on the floor, half covered by rugs, and the small girl who owns this apartment cannot fail to be happy. St. Louis Bepublic. Recipes. Cream Cookies-One cupful of crem, one and one-half cupfuls of sugar, two cupfuls of flour, one-hal teaspoonful of salt, one teaspoonful of soda, if sour cream is used, or two teaspoonfals of baking-powder sifted into the flour if the cream is sweet. Add safficient flour to roll lightly. Marbled Veal-Remove all skin and. fat from cold roast veal, season with spice and pound to a paste; skin a cold boiled tongue, pound it to a paste, then add to it nearly its weight. in butter. Put alternate layers of the veal and tongue into a jar, press it down firmly and pour clarified butter on the top. Berlin Toast-Beat together one 1tablespoon ful of flour, two tablespoon fus of milk, one egg and a little salt; cut stale b:-ead into slices, soak them Sin milk, but du not let them get soft enough to break, then cat on both sides with the batter and fry in but ter until nicely broaned on both sides. Sprinkle with sugar and a lit-. te cinnamo:' and serve hot. Cheese Ramakin-Put one large cupful of sweet milk in a saucepan with three heaping tablespoonfuls of bread crumbs and let them come to a Ltboit; remove from .the fire and add three tablespoonful.ofibatter and the beaten yolks of twp eggs, then add six heaping tablespoonfuls of grated ceeone-third of a teaspoonful each of salt and mustard, i little cay enne and last of all the whites of the Ueggs beaten to a stiff froth. Bake in a bttered dish fifteen minutes. Serve