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l .--~ 'j1t EEKtLstY EDITI1O WJNNSBORO, S.C., JANiUAR Y 24 1899, ESTABLISHED 1844. A LULLABY FROM THE WEST. H!y. baby: Ho, baby! what 's all the row? -Ciose up them peepers an' go to sleep now' Papp's here with him an' no un 'll hurt if tirree is, som4 galoot 's got to eat dirt! Juaiv n' Jibo;ophatt hear bow he yells! Wors"e'n a herd that's stampeded corralt' Soun.s likV Avaebes a-hantia' a muss Hey, baby! Ho, baby! dry up yer fuss! Rev, baby! Ho, baby! look out down there! That's ycr Pap's six-shooter-better take Baby 's too little to handle a gun; Wien yer in trous--rs yer Pappy '11 get one, Learn ye to siwot it, too. Bully fer you! Yer a true son o' West.through an' through! Loo; like a tenderfoot yet, but ye ain't Hey, baby! Ho, baby! sleep like a saint! Hey, baby! Ho, baby! Gosh! see him screw Up his kid face worse 'n coyotes '11 do! Dry up that noise, er yer Pappy 'It shoot, Thinkin' he 's trapped by a band o' Pimte! 31ammy'll come in a minute! Now quit! Panthers fer yellin' ain't in it a bit! Wha:! her ye quit? put an end to yer fuss? Hey, baby! Ho. 1:aty! cute little cuss! -Roy Farre.1 Green, in Puck. I& 9 I&9A& : ABIJAH BLAISDELL'S HEN. It Was Not the Widow Who Gave Way. 0 - BY SUSAN BRowN ROBBINS. "She's the most remarkable hen in the coantry. I know she doesn't look it. No,she'd never take a prize at the cattle show. She ain't, so to speak, pure blooded. Some folks would even call her mongrel, but I think it's more respectful to refer to her as a compos ite. Why,she knows more than some men and most women," and Abijah would gaze admiringly at his solitary. fow% l. "You'd think she'd be lonesome, wo!ld you? Wl, how about me? 0, no! we keep each other company. I don't waut any better companion than Belinda, and she never finds a bit of fault with me. -'Did I ever tell you how it came about that she was left here all alone? You know I used to keep hens. I had those three houses full. They didn't do well, somehow,.and one wi ater when grain was extra high and the hens didn't lay an egg, I got disgusted and vowed I'd sell off the whole lot of them. "Well, a hen man came along, and he and I went out and caught the hens, and an awful squawking and dust they made, too. When the man had paid me and gone off, I felt pretty good. "But just as I turned to go into the house I heard a little noise, and there came Beiinda picking along as nice as you please. I was mad, and I told her then and there that she needn't thmk she could get the best of me that way, and just as soon as I'd eaten np.a iess of -corned beef I'd just got, .kill her and have a chicken pie. 'She looked up at me and craiked, the way she hat. She gives two or thrLe craikes like an ordinary hen, and then her voice kind of breaks in a long, Pitiful wail. It sounded just as if she said '0,0,0, don't!' if you'll believe me, I said out loud to her, 'All right, I won't. ".:ince then she's had things about her own way. I was going to tear down the henhouses, but Belinda she likes to use all of 'e:n, so I didn't. She always lays in the first one. The second one she has for a dining room and living room, and she sleeps in the third one. "Yes, it's some trouble to take care ei them all, but as long as Belindla is satisfied I don't find any fault. "LP.y? You never saw a hen that wou1. lay as she does. She hasn't mis.sed .a day in six months. "And it's a funny thing, too. My aunt Nancy came here on a visit and stayed a month. Now, she hates hens, but she likes eggs. Well, what do you think? All the time she was here, Belinda didn't lay a single egg! But ,she began again the very day aunt Nancy went away. She knew what aunt Naney was just as well as I did, *and she wanted to spite her. "Why. I don't know b'.t I should have got married before now if it hadu't becen for Belinda, but I don't supp :se she'd like to have any other womian around." Thus would Abijah Blaisdell run on -about his hen, as long as any one would listen to him. TIhe widow Millett, Abijah's next _door neighbor, talked a good deal about ' hen, but in a differentstraiu. She addressed her remarks to herself or' to the hen, so no one was the wiser. She hated hens in generai, and Beliuda in particular. "If you'd mind your own business and keep on your own side of the fence, I wouldn't say a word, but I won't have you in my flower beds. Shoo! seat!" and she would shake her skirts at the intruder, and with a frown on her usually placid face, chase the hen off~ her premises. "It isn't alone that you are a hen," she would say again, as she sat at her wind(ow and looked over across at Abi.a h's yard where Belinda could be seen. 'But it's your being his hen, and matking him the laughing stock ot the neighborhood. He acts just as if you were a person, and he seems to have forgotton my existence. "To he sure, he never did take much notice of me, hut there was a time when I thought-" here she would b:eak off and blush a little; "well, any way, I should think you'd be ashamned to make a grown man act so sillv." As time went on her hatred of Be linda ine: eased. There seemed to be an irresistible fascination for the bed in Mrs. Millett's garden, and nearly every dahy found her scratching there. "I never did see a hen that knew anything," the widow would say wrathifully, "and I believe you know the least of any of the:n." She spoke to Abijah about keeping his hen at home, and he fixed up the fence with that object in view, but fnce were nothingr to Belina. She was light of weight, and could fly over anything constructed of laths. One day the widow found the hen busily digg;ng a large hole in the midst of her pansy bed. Thereupou in the heat of her anger she gave vent to dire thr-ats. "If I find you over here scratching again, you, Belinda Blaisdell, I shall kill you. Do you hear? You think I wouldn't do it, but I just would.. I have had to kill hens before now and I didn't like the job, but I alcost think I'd en'oy killing you, you mean old thing. Now remember! I'm a woman of my wor'd and I shall keep it, if I have to chase you all the way home to catch you." As she went into the house, she be gan to repent of her threats. '"I sup pose I should hate to kill her," she soliloquized, "but I said I would,and, yes, I will, if she scratches any more, But I'll keep a close watch of her and keep her away s3 that I won't have to do it. And I'il get Abi*ah to build his fence higher." After that Belinda was on Mrs. Mit lett's mind most of the time. She was driven home many times a day, and never got a chance to have a good scratch. But this thing could not go on for ever. As cold weather came on, and the frost hal talen most of her flowers, Mrs. Millett's vigilance began to relax, and one day Belinda came over and found a nice sunny place in a grassy banking, where she scratched 1 and dusted to her heart's content for half an hour before she was dis covered. There she lay her feathers full of dirt and her eyes blinking sleepily, whea Mrs. Millett came along an"; saw he. The widow pounced upon her, bui Beli.-da wa- too quick for her. There upon began a chase which only ended in the middle house, which Belenda had alvays used for a diwing room and living room. The next day there was news foi the gos-ips. Abi.a Blaisdell hadlust his heu. "You see, I was awav from home all day," he said, "aud I didn't get howe till dark. But I'd left feed eu-ugh for Belinda's dinner and supper, so ] didn't worry about her. I went out and shut the door of the third house, be cause I supposed she'd gone to bed, but I didn't look in, as I was in a hurry to get to my supper. "Well, this mo-ning I went to let her out, and she didn't come. The house was empty. The other two houses were empty, too, but in the seco-! one tnere were some feathers. Now, i suppose for some reason she took a nction to sleep in the second house, and as I didn't shut that, some var mint got in and ca ut her. It was a fox most like:y." For a day or two Abijah was low spirited, but he was of a philosophical mind, and he decided to make the best of it, so he began to tear d6wn the heahouses, as there was no further use for them. It was the fourth day after Belinda's disappearance that A bij- went to do so ue whitewashing for Mrs. Millett. "You'd better stay to dinner,' sh4 had said, "then you can work longer,' and Abijah had agreed. The widow was up early that moen ing and had her dinner started be times. Only a few minutes before Abijahi came she removed the covet of a ktle whichi was si ging on the stove and lo.,ked in anxiously. "I expect you'd a-b)een us tough as a biledt ow.l if I hadn't kept you se long. she said. "As it is. I guess you'd better bail pretty steady til] noon. Abijah worked baisi'y and cheer. fully, anid as the savory smells fromr th Li kitc in ca ne to lim, his spirit a rose and he whistled his favorite tunes. W hen dinner was announced he d'ropped his brush instantly a id came without delay. He e joyed his dinner immensely, and as hae took a seco1d helping of the central dish he said, lo.>king across ai the wimdow. "I believe this is the best chicket pie I ever ate." "I'm glad yo.u like it,"she answered, and he n iticed that she blushed at his cotapliment. They say that the way to a uman 's heart is through his slo.nach. If this is true, that chick:n pie must hav< been the e itering wedge in the case of Abijah Blaisdell. Be this as it may. he and the widon~ were marri.ad last June. --Bostor Herald. A Dog Stops' a IKuna.wa'. A butcher boy in Chicago, foni years ago, taught a Great Dane pur to sit on the seat of the delivery wagon, hold the reins in his mioutl and pull back on them if the horsE started while the boy was away. It was a pretty trick, and has been the pride of the butcher boy even after he got a shop of his owr and. had o'her boys to deliver for him. A few days ago, as the Great Da-e was trotting beside the wagon, the horse shied so~ violently as to throw~ the driver fr.omi his seat. The horse then ran away nyi the street, the reins dratgging on the g:ound. The dog wa, puzzled for ten seconds. , He looked at the boy scrambling to his feet, half dazed. He looked at the runaway horse tearing down thme street. He looked at the dangling lines and he decidedn something was to be done. Sprinting after the runaway he caught him in a block, seized thme r ins,whbich were luckily buckled, in his teeth, and settled back, an animated, seratching. bouneing~ anchor. The horse was not so very badly scared,after all,'and the dog was a big dog to carry on the bit. The horse stopped presently, the Great Dane grudting with joy of the struggle. and thme boy came up. All which shows the value of ently edu cation. -New York Commercial A dver - FOR FARM AND GARDEN VVVV V 1W' IF VV V What Calves Want. If a calf has a ration of half oats and half corn and half a fee1 of it or a little more-that is, a little more than half of what it would eat up clean if it had a chance-and if the place of the grass is taken by good ciover hay, with shelter from storms and protec tion from excessive cold, with plenty of salt and pure water, the ca:f will pay for it all, evea if corn were 40 cents a bushel. We would not feed an all-corn ration, blcause the calf re.juires muscle-forming material, and oats and bran are the cheapest fcods of this kind. We would not feed all oats or bran, especially in severe weather, becanse corn is nueeded to k.eep up the heat and round out the muscies.-Wallace:s Farmer. Fattening Foods. Buckwheat is v-ery fattening and seems to have a whitening effect upon the flesh. It is much fed by the French, who are quite successful tar key growers, and it is thought by them that this grain imparts to the flesh a delicions nutty flavor much liked by their epicures. Barley is also a fattening food, but should not be given ia as large quan tities as corn, nor fed as often, as it is not so easily digested, but it is very useful to feed occasionally for a change. Sweet potatoes coatain sugar and are conseqnently fattening and are a valuablenlditionto the fattening ration when fed in Moderate qanti ties. Wuen fed in large qnaLati,ies it is -aid they will impart a yellow tinge to the flesh. Warm th. M11lk. At this time of year it is often a dif ficult matter to churn cream and ex tract its butter fat. Warming the n.iik to 140 degrees is an effective iemedy for this. It will a!so enable the dairyman to get a greater amount of cream from the same milk than he otherwise would. But the milk should not be allowed to become much warmer than 110 degrees or it will make the butter soft. As the warmed milk is cooled pretty much all the cream will rise at once. It should be skimmed before the top hardens into a crust, as it speedily will. When put away to await charuing at this season cream sho.ild be stirred once a day,so as to mix all its parts togetber and prevent mould forming on the sur fac.e. Colt Training. The trai.ing of colts should bigia when they are quite young, when they are easily handled and submit more readily than when left until older. I keep small halters which I put on them when they are from one to two years old, and begin by leading them about; or, if working the mare, I tie them beside her and it is very seldom that they fail to go along without any tronble from.the first. The e is no trouble about their getting behindand running batck when meeting other teams. A colt broken to the halter when young never forgets it, and is half broken to work. After it becoines acenstomned to the halter a bit can be tied to the halter and the colt will soon become bridle-wise before it is old enough to work! This will save trouble for both man and beast. -J. W. Shup in the Epitomist. Sewers anid Farm Drains. 'While the underdrain on the farm 'if deeply laid is seldo.n liable to get out of order, it is very diff'erent with the city sewer. Yet in the latter the greatest care is taken to fit the pipes into each other, so as to allow no water in the soil to get in. The city drain pipes are always glazed for the same pupoe We think this is a nmistaken policy in thjse who lay the sewvers. T'hey cannot keel) dirt from comning into the sewer through the gratings in the streets, and nless this has enongh water to flnsh the pipe frequently, some of this material will remain and obstruct the flow. The idea seems to be that a connected and glazed pipe is necessary to keep the water from comiing out at the joints if the pipe is full. WVe hatve had ex perience with many underdrains, and are sure that there is no such danger so long as the sewer has a fail through out its entire length. Where the fatll is greater the tile will not be full. When it comes to a small fall the pip)e may be full, but it wvill not ran out through the cracks, as there is a strata of soil or gravel that holds it back. If there were such joints between sewer pipes wait:ri would flowv into them at other times than when the sewer is flushed, and it would bring with it enugh air to help punrify the sewvage, whlich, as it contains the refuse of houses in cities,is often very offensive. If the city sewers were made p wrons they are de?p enough to drain much land on each side of them. -Boston Cultivator. Is we'et Clover Valuable? To answer this question somiething must be knowun of the character of the plant. It grows sp)ontanieously along trampled roadsides, even to the wheel ruts in abandoned road ways, and in tramped or sodden land anywhere. When fond in meadow lands it ap. pears not to 'cent except whlen the ground has been tramped byV sto:-k whie4 wee. It grows by preferene i:i old brick yards. It mamy be grown in fields by prope tillage. Yl n i: in no other light we thusi. see that swee -. clover grows iuxuri::utly .in i e where few or no other Dlan.ts flourish. But it belongs totihe great class of iegu minou~s plants, which avm capabi-, by the aid of other c.rgraismns, of fixinr the plant tissues , !Ohio experiment tation). It belongs with-the clovers and it may thus be used to improve the land upon whicli it grows,fand this appears to be its mission.'It oe-upies lands that have become unfitted for good growth of other firage plants. lts rank then is as a -iseful plant, capable of increasing fertility of land. How shall sweet clover be treated? The plant is the farmer's friend, to be utilized and not to be outlawed. The plant g.ows and spreads rapidly. So do red clover, white clover, timothy, blue grass and other forage plauts,but sweet clover grows whe're they do not. Its presence indicates lack oi con-1i lion for the others. Viewed in this WAy it is to be treated.' as preparing untted lands for otherrops. It may be mowed a short time tlefore coming into bloom and enred for hay. Stoi-k wi.l thrive upon it if confined until acenstomed to it. The. roadsides, if taken when free from Anst, may be made almost as profitable as any other area in clover by cttiig the sweet clover and curing for hay. If this is regalarly attended to *hile stock is kept from other lands th:t it invades, sweet clover will be found doing al ways the good work.for which it is adapted. -American Agriculturist. Advantages of Dishorning. The losses froin A 'u directly and indirectly caused by t useless and dangerous horns, is enormons in the aggregate. The lessening of dan ger to the attendants is tn important factor in favor of dishorning. Scores of accidents have occurred where per sons have been badly injured or killed by cattle, not always balls either, but young cattle and even- milch cows have been known to turn on their at tendants and injure them seve-ely. It is unwise to run any risks when the instruments of danger can be so qnickly and easily removjd. In the Imatter of saving of space in stabling there is much in favor of- dishorned cattle. Milch cows need no stalls, even when fastened with-chains, and certainly not if fastened with stan chions. As they do not quarrel, they can be placed closer together. Yonng cattle can be turned ia:o a stable loose, and willbe as peaceable as so many sheep. The same may be sqid of fattening cattle. I have seen over a carload of fat cattle, averaging 1700 pounds each, eating peacefully together at mangers, all loose. Stockmen are beginning to see the advantage in handling di-horned cat tle. Dishorned.feeders and fat cattle sell higher than horned cattle of like quality. While it is advisaule to have all cattle dishorned, it certainly is much more necessary to have all bulls dishorne. Wheia thus disarmed there is no daiger in handling. them. They becure db dent and .c6able. )k horned bull is a dangerous animi, al ways liable to be treacherous. He mav be safe one moment, but angry and furious th,- next. Calves can be I dishorned very easily when a week or two old. Trim the hair from where the horns are beginning to grow, wet it, and apply caastic potash. This will blister it and kill the embryo horn. If carefully done, no scar will be noticed afterwa: d. The potash comes in sticks,and should be handled carefully to prevent in ury to the hads. If the blistering is done dur' ng the summnner, apply pine tar to the wound to heal it quicker and keep the flies from it.-O. 3. Vine in Practical Farmer. A Winter Attack on the Bugs. The winter months afford a good oportunity for the busy fruit grower to give his orchard a sort of "house cleaning." And unless he wishes to be overrun with all sorts of insect vermin, this should not be neglecte 1. First, sharpen the ax, and use it freely in cutting out all peach trees that have s.iown signs of yellows, which trees should have been marked before the leaves fell; plum trees af fected with black-knot, peach trees tnneled by bores, andi any trees cov ered with the guonmy exudations of the little fruit bark-beetle. Upon old trees it w.ll be well to give the bark a good scrapiag and in this way catch many of the chrysalids of the Codling moth, hibernating pear psyllas, oyster shell and seurfy scales. When pruning, all the cuttings should be burnt, as the crotehets and buds of the smiall twigs harbor con,t less eggs of the plant lice, espe i:slly the apple aphis on apple,and the hop louse on plnm trees. The eggs of several orchard pests are quite conspicaOus in winter and they may be easily picked by hand and then burnt. The hard, g-ay mas' of the tent caterpillar's eggs, the pien dat cases of the bag-worms, and the flat, white cluster of the Tussock mo:h's eggs, may all be readily seen, and these pests are best controlled by such attention in winter. If any trees are badly infested with the oyster shell, senrfy or San .Tose sale in.scets, the winter is the best and ailmost the only time to advan Itageously destroy them. Spray the trees thoroughly with a solution of potash whale oil soap, two pounds to the gallon of hot water. . Remnember that the scales will not be killed un less they are hit, and the trees should therefore be carefully sprayed from all sides. Lastlv. don't forget to rake up all tme leaves and rubbish around the or chard. Many an iasect, like the plum eurculio, hides in such refus4 over winter and could be easil3 Icaught. I:o'n't wait until they are upon you, to do battle with the bugs; but steal: umeh o'n the:n and clean them out b; a winter attack. --E. Dwight Sander sou, Mairyland Agricultural College. CutSoms receipts of the Unite< -tats treasury department nov a out to one-half the ordinary ex. peniur of the government. iN OUEAC N -ICE BREAKE. A RUSSIAN -SHIP THAT KEEPS WIN TER PORTS OPEN. A Powerfnt Vee That Looks Like a j%kitt1eshi) - Can Carry Passen-ers and Cargo and Could Plow a Way Into the Arctic *ea- It Convoys Merchantmen. At Neweastle-on-Tyne, England, there has been launched the pioneer ship of pelagic ice-breakers. The em ployment of large ice breakers had been conined to the great lakes of Cauada until the direction of the si berian railroad ordered a powerful vessel of this class, which is being built on the shores of Lake Baikal, n Cloella. Admniral Maakoff drew the atten tionof the Russian governmieat to tie expe:ience gained in tho-e inland s-las, and induced it to place an order tor an oceal-going vessel larger, heavier and inure powerful than any ice breaker vet built. The work which sh is to un(lertakhe is much more am bitions than anything that has hitherto been considered practicable, a:i. it is held by many men of expe rieuce in navigation amid frozen wa ters that tbere will be no great diiji culty in keel iug open many, it not all, of the principal trade routes of the world which now are impassable every witer. The ice-breaking ferry steam ers vf the Canadian lakes succeed in maintaiiing practically unbroken con nection between their stations through ice four feet in thickness, and they a:e Often calt.d upon to face what are actualhy known as windrows, wben the drift ice has been piled up by the efYect of the wind to a height of soaetiies twenty feet. The greatest thickness of field ice reported! ny Dr. _ausen is twe!%e feet and this was in latitudes where even co.uluercial enterpri.e has not ye. made for it. e.f an oatlet. Within the luits to which t;ade has hitherto been couifiled no such thickness of ice is to be Lun. Tn di:nensions and appearance of the ve,sei wou!d suggest a battieship were it not that the how is cut away and forms an exceedingly long over hang which serves the double purpose of breaking the ice with which it comes in con tart by concentrating tho "vis viva" of the vessel and of pro teeting the forward propeller. The eari,er ice breakers were designed on the principle of breaking down the ice by brute force. Tho cutaway b ,w enab!es the vessel to be run partiaily up on to the ice, and if th eight thus appied was not sufficient to break tue ice, the icebreaker went astern until she came off and tried rVMin. The principle upon which the new vessei attacik tie isalso bO -t3 force, bat it is ang-iented by Science. The forward propeller, by disturbing the w.iter under the ice, deprives it of its support and then renders it n co:nparatively easy task fur the heavy ves,el to break through it. The pnnipal di.iensions of the ship are: Length. 305 feet; breauth, 71 feet. and deth, 42 feet 6 inches. When fully loaded the draft will be 25 feet and the corresponidinlg displace ment abou't 800 tons. The propel ling m:achinery has been divided into four sets, or which three sets are aft, each dris ing its own propeller, and one set forwvard. The comnbined i.ower of these foar sets of machinery will be 10,003 horses. There is accommno dation for thirty fir st-class passen gers,ten second-class and fifty third class p)asseingers, besides that for the captain, officers, engineers and crew of the vessel. There is ample capacity for cargo, so that the v-essel, in addi-. tion to convoying mnerchatnt vessels throngh the ice, is capable of carry ing a ~heavy cargo herself. The stein of the ice breater is cat to form a re css, into which the stern of another veset can be securely lashed and thus obtain the tutmost protectionl from her powrtul consort. Ad.nral Marakolihas also in view the possibility of augmenting the ice brea king capiabi.ities of this ves%el by having the assistance of a se -ond 'es sel pushin14 her-, as to which he has alread y muade experiments. The con voing of merchant steamers is, of course, the priary ob'est of the ice breaking stea ner, and it is contident lv expccted that in a very short timae te Drincipafl trade routes wvhich de pendl on .Baltie jo: ts will be kept open in winter, and thus provile contian o:ts emiploy.nenit for a large coman The hull is divided into no less than foryeight complartmienits, each one of ' hi:h is absolutely water-tight. Wa ter-tight iu!kheads are, of course, comm:ioly talked of, but no wvater tight buIlaheads have been siub)ected to such severe tes:s as those itn t his ves 521. Every co.npartment has been filled with water and ptut under a pressture due to a column of water extending to the upper deck. In the case of the lre eunpartments, sneh as the en gine and boiler roomis, this repr esent edl a v-ery serious operation. as tue capacity of each boiler room is nearly 2000 tons. I Entirely Too Per'onal. During a Scottish t:mr which the Pot Wadsworth took with his sister le was greatly struck by Kilchurn IjCastle. aind~ aldressed a solemn poem on it Thee vese hat penedl to fall uder the eve of a boy who had been aske iby *adies t o read something j .a. In a '"tuCcent uf its character I '. they he begya. ii a tone intended to e :uresi y soleaa, "Skeleton f nnitesed un:.ml!ity!" unt the ef a t .t a nd '.: :: il:er thian anyone -o'. hr in:i'n-.i E, oile of the aw listeners :1! 1h ...s certainly rery ti'n, lcand t.o her fet an ex 9il:ed. idi. r.ally: --We\. I amth :h inest wom an i:1 I.reland, Int I can .t approve of pjersonal remarks" m it hrg TDar,atch. - SHE SET 1000 KUSSU--S. A Young Woman's Confidence in -Jerry simpron's Election. Kansas,with her usual reputation of producing many strange and wol-derful things, is again at the front %ith one of the most peculiar election bets that has so far come to light. Out in Grant county, which is one of the 36 counties that go to make up the big Seventh Congress d:strict, over which Jerry Simpson and Chester . Long haveso bitterly contested for the past few vears, there is situated at the junction of the noith fork of the Cim niaron river and Prairie Dog creek the little town of Golden, a "short grass" hamlet, inasmuch as it is situ ated in that part of Kansas known as the short-grass region. Golden is not what might be called a prosperous village, nor was it expected it would be when first settled. It consists of one general merchandise store, pust office and a few dwellings. The in habitants of the surrounding country are mostlyranchien and cowb.ys,who centre at Goldea for the purchase of sapplies. It was Mi;s Lucy Withers, a resident of Golden, who brought tuis. isolated prairie town to the attention of the public, relates the Sun. Miss With ers is a comely woman of some 20 Kansas summers, a school teacher and lives with her widowed mother. She has always been a great admirer of Jerry Si:pson from Medicine Lodge and never loses an opportunity to champion his cause. A few evenings before election there was a social gatheringin the neighbor hood, and it was during this time that Miss Withers and a young and well to-do rancl'man by the nane of Har old Owens ;ook opp.ilng views on the politicsl sitiation. The youug teacher questioned .%Ir. Owens as to the depth of his faith i2 his candidate's election and whether or not he was willing to wager some cf his possessions to show his canfidenc. This was somewhat cf a set-back ior the youtg ranchman, but he iaformcd her that he had 30 of the finest steers that ever graed in Grant county, all of which he valued at $1000, and which ho would bet that Mr. Long would be elected to Con ress. "What have you, Miss Withers, to show your faith in the return of SimDp son to Congress"" asked the ranch man. Now, the teacher owned no steers, neither had she anything ejuivalent to 30head of cattle,bat sie determined not to be outdone. She hesitated a moment and said: ". will wager you 1000 kisses at $1 estch against your steers that Jerry Simpson wins." The youlng ranchian had civilized bieking bront o,:, mastered the lariat and many other difinlt feats in a ranchman's life, but this offer was the most perplexing proposition that had crer b<en handed him. There was something fascinating about the col lateral ofered, and he replied: "I will accept with the understand ing that in case I win you allow me to collect my winnings on the install ment plan." "You may suit your pleasure abont that." "T hen it is an agreement, and our listeners are the wit nesses." - The election resulted in a bad de fet for Mr. Simpson. Harold Owens says he will collect 20 kisses a week util the obligation is cancelled. An Emperor Who Liked a Scoldling. The Emperor of Russia, whose pas sion for pease was his most distin gnishing characteristie, was much at ached to the iate Queen of Denmark, his~ mather-in-law. Never having )een educated for the throne, th'T burdens and care of autocracy sat heavily upon him. The late Queen of Demark had a shrewd tongue, and was wont to exercise it on her numner os andi powerful connections. As a mother-i n-lawv she was not deficient in those qualities attributed by bar barian and civilized nations alike to the mother of a man's wife. The Prince of WVales has not visited the Danish court e scept at rare interva's. WVih the late Russian emperor it was different. He enjoyed his annual visit to Freienborg as the happiest period of hais year, and his zest was enhanced by the way in which he was taken to task by his mother-in-law, who vigo ously scolded him when his actions did not, in her opinion, achieved the standard she laid down for her sons-in- law. I was told on one occasion, when the T.sar was in Copenhagen by a high fnne tionary at the Danish court, that the late Russian emperor wvas probably the only man in Europe who looked for wad to his mother-in-la's annual scoling asone of the keenest pleas. nrso is life.--London Letter in Harper's Weekly. ea Robbers Who Extart Blackma.il. "Wreckers is but another name for sea robbers," said a prominent ntaval oticer, when discussi ig the casting away of the Maria Teresa. His re mars were directed toward those wvh( tried to obtain some title to the vessel in order to get salvage. "Every mar. iner knows,'' lie continued. "'wiat these wreckrrs are like. If a vessel is discovered in the leatst-iistress they at once put off and try and b,oard her. If they get their feet upona her deck, no mattLr what is afterward done,they at once claim salvage and libel the vts se, comnpelling her owness to go int< court at great exi ense. These pirates are little better than blackmailers, fu: many seafaring :nen prefer to pa; something rather than go into the courts. Thnere a-e u.any capta ns o vessels who, as s:on: a' they sð wreckers apmachinug. arma t :e.:r reeta Iwith handspikes an.d be.t them oT i they atte:nypt :, lbo.tra in orde. to avoit Ithe blackm:sil or the expeuse of die fenditg a case in the eonrs."~'-Wash. FIFTY iM-K TM-Azr Ive wandered to the city, Tom, rve hunted up thespot Where von and I drowned chipmunks out, An High bee's meadow lot. The lot is in the same place, Tom, and yet it doen't grow The rosin weed and grass we knew, just flfty years ago. That same old patch of ground, Tom, where Kirkbride kept his cow. Is in a business centre, and you wouldn't know it now. Two sixteen-story houses, Tom. are stand ing there to show flow things have changed since we were kids, just fifty years ago. A pair of worn-out breeches, Tom, would on.:e have bought that lot. I had the breeche.--could have bought it just as well as not. And go-d and hard I kicked myself because I didn't kn6w Enough to pound sand in a rat hole, fifty years ago. -Chicago Record. HUMOROUS. A Kansas paper, referring to a fatal accident which befel a prominent citi zen, says he "met death at the hands oi a horse." "I don't believe in being affable to inferiors." " ou don't? Just think how lonely you would be if everybody felt that way." ":obby, won't you give a penny to help build Lafayette a monument?" "No'm, not unless we git his birth day fer a hollerday." Miss Totling-Miss Sincoe was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. Miss Dim i-g (after a glance at the mouth)-Tabespoon? Priscilla-What are young Win. th ro and his wife quarrelling about so bitterly? Priscella -Oh, about which of them loves the other most. At Sunday school a little girl was asked, "Way should y..u not hide your light under a bushel?" '.he re ply came pat, "For fear of setting fire to it." Crawford-How is it that those de falcations are always by trusted clerks? Crabshaw-.3ecause the ones tha, are not trusted never get a chance at the money. Kaiser Wilhelm (watching a sword. swaliower)-Faugh! I couldn't do that. Court Fiunkey-Ach! Yes. Your Majesty already has done every thing except that. AMistress (angrily)-See, Bridget, I can write my name in the dust on this - mantelpiece. Bridget (admiringly) There's nothin' like eddication, after all, is there, mum? Parker-One place is just as good as another for a man without money. Taeker-Yes, and it's- fortunate, too, for a man without money can't stay in the same place long. WNhy, Frankie," sid. his imoth#r1 "what are you reading in that book about bringing up children?" "I'm just looking to see whether rm being properly brought up." "I know Miss Longsince isn't real ly handsome any moze, but she has a dear little mouth." "She has, in deed. I happen to know that her last dental bill was $87.50.',' Mrs. Newlywed (with evident sur prise) --Aren't you the very man I gave some cake to two days ago? ?nodding Pete (in explanation) Yes'm. Y'see, I didn't eat it. Maud-My mamma says she can re member when your mamma kept a grery store. Marie-My mamma says she can remember how much your mamma owes for her groceries. Professor-TOO bad ! One of my pupils, to whoam I have given two c.rses of instruction in the cultiva tion of the memory, has forgotten to pay me, and the worst of it is I can't reiember his name. "And, resibrJ igt there are two things I must jnt. upon: truthfulness and obedience'" '"s mu; a.id when you tell me to teIl the laidies you're out, when you're in, which shall it be, mum." Mrs. Upjohn-Our minister is a highly learned man. I believe he knows every word in the dictionary. .'a rs. Dvownlieigh - That's nothing. Our preacher uses lots of words that ain't mn 1he dictionary-at all. "It's a conundrum-to mehow a man can keep his seat in a street car when there's a lady standing." "Well, if he is really polite, it must be a hard con undumtohim, too." "Why so?" "Jcase he gives it up." son-i-la w, a young lawyer)-I'm not oiug to give my daghter a cash lory, but I have some doubtful c.ims for $10,000 that I will make over to you, and you can sue on Little William was standing at the window watching the approaching storm. Great black clouds overspred the sky, when suddenly a bright flash of ligtning parted them for an in stant. "Oh, mamma," he said, "I saw that funder wink." A Marriage Test. Both in the northern and western Iislad's of Scotland the -natives~ have some peculiar castoms unfamiliar to the dwellers on the mainland. One of these, known as the "marriage test," is racti'cd in the Island of St. Kilda, where the population barely exceeds 10'. Evcry man, before he is deemed suita:e for a husband, has to perform an volution attended with -no little Jbodily risk. The-St. Kildans are, of coure, adept rock-climbers, and the - as)iut for ma'rimony is therefore subjected to the t.est of balancing him self on ouie leg on a narrow ledgi overhaging a precipice, bending his ,od at the same time in order to holdI he foot of his other leg in his hands. If found lacking in . courage the mien wiithdraws from-ber betrothal, Iand sacald the man fall over the leMe~ ' it is p:exmed that in that case h.