University of South Carolina Libraries
The Conscientious Candidate By JAMES J. MONTAGUE V Sitting by himself In a-hotel room I found an old friend of earlier da. a, chewing a toothpick,' and gloomily regarding a cheering crowd outside the open window where a man was standing In an automobile and ad dressing an obviously approving crowd. M I8 that your candidate?” I In quired. “Not any more^ ’ was the surly reply. “I thought you were one of his managers.” “Listen. That lad hasn’t got any managers. I was one, but I ain’t any more, and moreover, I won’t be. I’m. waiting for the next train that will take me back home.” “What was the trouble ?" “It would take more than between now and train time to tell you. That fellow hasn’t got any political brains. I was up all night last week, writing him a speech—the regular speech that used to go big In all the cam paigns I’ve been in. When I showed it to him, he read It, believe it or not, read every line of it, and then he said: “ ’But you’ve made a lot of prom- CREOMULSION ises here that I can't carry out No body could carry them out Don’t you realize that I’d be expected to carry them out if I was electedT “‘Listen, 1 * I said, ‘you’re new In this game, but you’re smart, or any way I think you are, and you can learn. Nobody pays any attention to campaign promises except a ^few cranks, and they woVt bother you after ^election day. You’ll have secretary to keep them from bother ing you ‘“What you’ve got to do Is to let us old hands tell you what kind of promises will get votes, gnd then go and make them, and take the bows. You just attend to the. talking— you’re good at that—and we’ll get somebody up from headquarters to hand you the speeches. The ones "What are you going to do about it?" I inquired, as he paused to catch his breath. “Well, the trouble is, we can’t do nothing about it We ain't got noth ing on him like we'have with a good many of the men we nominate^ He ain’t made us no promises, which mebbe was our fault, for we thought he’d be so~ glad to have us tell him what to do that he’d come in askin' for advice every day. “It’s too late to head him off now, and the worst thing about it is, he’s makln’ headway, and maybe will get elected In spite of all we can do to stop him, an’ that’ll be a lot, believe me. “Look at him, out there, tellin’ ’em he won’t make no promises unless he knows he can carry them out, he won’t have no boss directin’ him in the discharge of his duty to the peo ple, an' he thinks the mandate of! ^ Favorite PreKription . No alcol It for granted that he’d be a good boy and do what was right. But we have learned our lesson. He’ll prob ably be elected, for he goes good with the crowd, an* he may get re nominated—such fellers do, some times. But when he quits* an* we put in another -man, that man is goin’ to be our man, 0 an’ he’s goin’ to admit it in writln’ before he gets his name so much as mentioned In the convention hall.” A sound of loud cheers came through the open window. The old politician grinned. “He’s bad busi ness for us,* he said. “But I can’t help admirin’ his nerve, at that” <£. Bell Syndicate.—WNU Bervlca. Eloquent Silence Men’s silences are more speaking than their smiles. RECORD PILGRIMAGE Nearly 60,000 men, all ex-soldfere of 15 nations, recently took part in the largest pilgrimage ever made to the shrine of Our Lady of Lourdes at Lourdes, France. Three former enemies stood guard pver the fa mous grotto, they being, st the re quest of the popfe, a German, a Bel gian and a Frenchman. Among the countries represented were the Unit ed States, Canada, Great Britain, France, Belgium, Italy, Germany, Hungary, Austria, Czechoslovakia. Poland, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania and Brazil. the people is more important than the orders of all the political bosses by druggists that ever put their heads together in a back room. weak women strong. No alcohol. Sold in tablets or liquid.—Adv. A Scientists Find Fast Way to Relieve a Cold Ache and Discomfort Eased Almost Instantly Now ,.j In Retrospect ear .own druggist b as cad to cheerfully refund M l L j. Agutl sw aa^ea •MV lf)vf If yOT Jfm by Crtocvwlsaoii COUGHS (&NEED A TONIC? Mn Marie Dean of 209 Perkins St, Augus ta, Ga., said: “I had a general breakdown in health, felt weak and tired out had headache and backache and was ▼cry nervous I had no desire to eat I had hardly finished one bottle of Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery when I noticed a great difference. I felt so much stronger and soon picked up again.” New rise, tablets 50 eta., liquid $1.00. Lsrge rise, taba. or liquid, $1.35. M We Do Oar Pars." FEEL HIED, ACHY- “ALL WORN OIT?” Get Rid of Poisons That Make Yon 111 I S & constant backache keeping you miserable? DO you suffer burnlnjgr T scanty or too frequent urination; attacks of dizziness, rheumatic pains, swollen feet and ankles? Do you feel tired, nervous —all unstrung? Then give some thought to your kidneys. Be sure they function properly, for functional kidney dis order permits poisons to stay In the blood and upset the whole sys- tem. ' Use Doan’s Ptttt. Doan’s are for the kidneys only. They help the kidneys cleanse the blood of health- destroying poisonous waste. Doan's Pills are used and recommended the world over. Get them from any druggist. BOHN’S PILLS —-nawds mora than cosmatics Beauty of skin comes from with in.When con stipation clogs the pores with intestinal wastes, CLEANSB INTER- NALLY with Garfield Tea. Helps relieve the GARFIELD TEA Are pee ell In, tfcwri end ns , - WM rid yen ef MALARIA end build you up. Used for 65 years for Chills. Fever, Malaria and A Genaral Tonic I0e end $1.00 At All Drawgiata you’ve been writing ain’t sound. You keep talking about not being able to perform Impossibilities. That won’t make you any votes. Now, don’t worry. It will be all right; you Just leave that speech with me and IT1 leave In It anything that ought to be there, and let one of the bright lads I’ve brought along fix the rest of It for-you.' “ ‘But,’ he says, T wouldn’t make a speech that somebody else wrote for me.’ “‘You wouldn’t, hey,’ I says. •WeA, smarter guys than you has made ’em and grabbed off big Jobs by makln’ ’em, and after they was elected they managed to squirm out of ’em, like they all do.’ “ ‘But that wouldn’t be honest,’ he says. “ ‘It wouldn’t be stealln*, -or bur- glarin’, would it?* “ ‘Pretty much the same thing, yes.’ “Now, what could you do with a bird like that?” “Well, what did you do with him?” “There wasn’t nothing to do, of course, but just let him take the bit in his mouth. And a terrible mess he’s made of It. “Why, do you know the very next day he told a crowd out In front of the hotel that when he was elected he wanted ’em to come down to the Capitol and tell him If there was anything wrong with the way things was going, and If they had any coin plaints, and so forth. What do you think of that? After he was Elected mind you. He’d listen to ’em after he had the job and didn’t need to listen to ’em.' # “I sat down then and tried to have a serious talk with him, and explain that nobody ever took campaigns se riously, and that he was to leave what happpnpd after hp wan alaefad to older and wiser heads that had grown gray In politics. “He was a little huffy at that, but I thought he could take his medicine, even if it didn’t taste good, and set to work tellin’ him, as I would tell a little child, what It was all about. And what does he do but turn on his heel and walk off! “The next morning I went up to fils room, where he was makln’ a lot of party leaders—poor old boys past fifty—chuck one of them medicine balls at each other just because he liked to get exercise that way., “He was all smiles when, he see me, and chucked the ball at. me, meanln’ to be playful, and it hit me on the ear and hurt. But I. was so pleased to think he’d come around to my way of thinking that I didn’t say anything till the other boys had gone. “Then I said: ‘Well, I see you ain’t mad any more, so I suppose It’s all right.* “‘You suppose what’s all right?* says he. . * -v . • “‘Why, the quarrel between you and me. I knew gjou wouldn’t take that serious.’ “’Nb^he says, T didn’t take it se rious. Here’s another speech I wrote this morning.’ He handed it to me, and I put on my spectacles to read It, and found he’-d said again that when he was elected he was going to be the people’s man, and that the first professional politician who came to him to give’ advice -or offer Instructions would be chucked out of the g^ndow. ' . , —“Well, 1 just turned on my heel and walked away. Here am L out there is he, givln* a talk to the people about the danger of trick pol iticians cornin’ into the offices an’ tryin’ to Influence elected officials, and how. If he was elected, the first thing he’d do would be to try to get to ask for a law makln’ attempts to Influence an official a felony. A felony l Think of thatl" “I suppose we got It cornin’ to us. We nominated him, because we took Many of one’s “good times’ 1 only s<^ In remembrance. Airship to Bring About r Closer Bond of Union? Beginning - next July all of the United States and all of Europe will be connected by a maxiraunTair service of 72 hours. That Is less time than It now takes the best steamers to go from New York to Liverpool. Plans are being laid for extending air transportation from our Pacific coast to Hawaii and Aus tralia and soon to Asia. Not long thereafter regular air lines will traverse Asia, just as has been shown to be possible from England to Australia by the recent race, and regular round-the-world mall and passenger service will be In full swing. How soon this will be con summated is uncertain, but as air development is now progressing it is safe to predict a maximum limit of five years, with three and even two years as a possibility. What effect such a dose union of the world by transportation and transmission of Intelligence will have upon universal peace must await developments. Theoretically It should be a strong bond of union between the nations and tepd to ren der them common-minded. That has been the effect of Improved trans portation and more general distribu tion of news and greates personal contacts between residents of differ ent sections of the United States. Personal acquaintance la the great- 1 Take S BAYER Aspirin Tablets. •* Make sure vow fst the BAYER Tablets you aril Mr. est antidote for belligerency;^ It Is fair to assume, that better acquaint ance among the nations .and a clear er knowledge by the peoples of all countries of those of all other coun- trles will make for less hostility and suspicion, and thus remove the great est fundamental cause of war. But It is possible this Influence will not develop rapidly enough to avert an other great struggle. So far from promoting the psy chology of peace, expansion of air navigation has until now produced the opposite effect Every nation In Europe has had its fears and sus picions magnified by the increased I»osslbilittes of hostile invasion by air. This Is Inevitable so long as mankind continues to cling to the theory that force is the right and dominant Influence in settling inter national differences, and also domes tic differences, as we see in Russia, Germany, Italy and Spain. With such a mental attitude, every in crease In offensive power must add to apprehension and stimulate greater preparation for defense. Yet that does not negative the fact, that more mutual knowledge and under standing Is the gateway to world peace, and that this new element, at present arousing fear, will eventual ly make felt Its Influence for peace —SL Louis Globe-Democrat m Drink a full (las of watar. Repeat treatment In 2 hours. «»IRK€TI«llt MCTaait" The simple method pictured here it the way many doctors now treat colds and the aches and pains colds bring with them I It is recognized as a safe, sure, QUICK way. For it will relieve an ordinary cold almost as fast as you caught it Ask your doctor about this. And ■ when you buy, be sure that you get the real BAYER Aspirin Tablets. They dissolve (disintegrate) almost Instantly. And thus work almost in stantly when you take them. And for a gargle. Genuine Bayer Aspirin Tablets disintegrate with speed and completeness, leaving no irritating particles or grittiness. BAYER Aspirin prices have been decisively reduced on all size^ so there’s no point now in accepting other than the real Bayer article yon want 3 lf thioat k acre, crush and stir S • BAYER Aspirin TaMets in a third ef a glass of water. Gargle twice. This throat sorsneas almost instantly. i on Genuine Boyar Aspirin iadlcally tori weed on AN Slant How Calotabs Help Nature To Throw Off a Bad Cold Millions have found in Calotabs a most valuable aid in the treatment of colds. They take one or two tab lets the first night and repeat the third or fifth night if needed. How do. Calotabs help Nature throw off a cold? First, Calotabs are one of the most thorough and de pendable of all intestinal elimlnants, thus cleansing the intestinal tract of the germ-laden mucus and toxlne* Second, Calotabs are diuretic to the kidneys, promoting the elimination of cold poisons from the blood. Thus Calotabs serve the double purpose of a purgative and diuretic, both' of which are of colds. Calotabff needed in the treatment •re ouite economical: only twenty-five cents for the family package, ten cents for the trial pnpkAft!. (Adv) METROPOLITAN GRAND OPERA direct from its New York Stage 3-Hour Broadcast by Li S T E R i N E announced by Geraldine Farrar Every Saturday • all NBC stations PARKER’S HAIR BALSAM D—dn»ff-Stop* Hair VriHnf Baaaty to Grav and Fadad Hair Mcaad 11.00 at Drantota. CimcuRA SHAMPOO-Ural for um la connartion with Parker’a Hair Balaara.Makeatha a raft and fluffy. M canta by mail or at < l Hiaaox Chemical Worka. ~ •LB Att PENSION INFORMATION HNCLOSB STAMP JUD«M UCHMAM, HUMBOLDT, MANS. WHY WORK? — Stay ta your home and receive $10 dally. Send two dlmee tot particulars. Carrell, S5S W. IMh St.. Mew Vdrk City. Bathe the affected parts freely with Catlcura Swap an<Uiot water,dry gently, and anoint will Catleara Oiataaeat. Pore and healing, thcae super-creamy emollienta bring qukh relief and aoo “Cutlcura,” Dept. Msddmnf huwo* ‘heard the news/ the REGULAR PRICE Of CALUMET BAKING POWDER IS NOW ONLY A POUND/ 'tm. AND IT SAK€S 6€Tf€R-rr ACTJ TWI«/* v °*Cf, V , m poet cnni\ &*T;,'TTg$ To make your glassware thoroughly dean and bright : wash it in a solution of our Baking Soda JW-EBp*... A Soda solution effectively deans beverage bottles, jelly glasses, preserve jars ? and keeps the baby’s nursing bottles safely dean $ I • • • Our Soda sprinkled on a damp doth deans bathtabs, wash- stands,' porcelain fixtures e a • Keep an extra package in the bathroom cabinet • • .your grocerJbaii itior just aiaw cents . . • Mail the coupon today.