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THE OUTSIDE DOG. tYon may sing of your dog, your bottom dog, Or of any dog that you pleaso: 1 co for thu log, the nico old dog lhiat knowingly takes his oanlo, And wagging his tull outsido the, ring, J(eoping always his bono in sight, Caros not a pin ein his Houlnd old hund For either dog in the light. Not his Is the hono they aro fighting for, ,And why should my dog sail in* I- Ii nothing to gain but at corain chance To loso his own precious akin? 'T"hero may ho a fow, perhaps, who fall 'I'u so'. it eiite in this light; hiut whoe thu fur fills I band rather bo '1ho outsid dog In the light. I know thero are dogs, Injudicious dogs, 'haut think It Is guite thes thing 'o tako thu part of one of thu (logs, Anei go yolplng Into the ring. hiut i enr p not a pin what all may say in regard to the wrong or the right, Iy lonoy goes, ats woll as lny song, For tle dog that keops out of the light. -Philadulphia Call. TOM'S FLIRTATION. | The Love Story of a Tease. "And so you Positively refuse to give lil this intimacy'?" "Really, you ask too mic'i, aunty. What else can I do it) this stupid place? I am1 deIooted to achting, you kcnow, and besides, Mr. Trevor is the only man here Who has a iloto' ear."' "Iht, my ch ild. you are engaged to ie married! Vhat would Tomn say if he sbould hear of it? And what welutl Youi do if he followed your ex " h, w I .w ish he w ooul d! Ilis devo til111 wear!1ie's mlle somiletimes. lie used to be u(lite i tcase, hut sine our en Yaii:e!n-Iit 'le s5'eems to have foI'esw\or'nI e''veryhin e:xciting."' Flossie tossed her pretty head until lier ilione curls fell over hreyes i 11r(tl w1\'i gleamed a spirit of ili: ehIlef. The fir:;t speaker w\as Aliss Tread way, the girl's aunt, a wealthy vomnl of, lorty yea cs. who Ihal adopted her afler (Le death of her parents. l"los si's haice, a young doctor of good fa'lily anild some iieaniis, was coiml llh- ling a iiledi(cal course inl Geri'm'an1y, am;i I hcy were lto e niarriecd as soon 4 1 he r(e('ived his foreign di)loait. di'. 'Trevor's Smmerlie)' 1om.', a ile Si ltn' itan ;i(n1 ' otv'I)lking ilie harbor, w\a; the 51 (in( of many1) 1 .T:ti1itics. Hie had already giveIn 1wo dinn(1ers ill l'h( s:i( e'si hot)nor, 1 l atwhch funci tions . i';"Tr<'1dway had sei vedl as anl unl viiliig chapeerorn. lo she realized ihat ii,- briilaittt (omp;ny invited to meet ihen rvearded her niece as the I'euture Airs. ''revor. Now we find her reprov ing her young relative, With indil' f'rent snlecc ss. "Flossie," said Aii; ''read\way. "i tilink yOu1 ougihi to 'onsiderle \I. Trevor's feelings. It is not. fair to l'iml; he does not. know ahoul Tom. 1'e'rhaps you had better tell himl'?" "And spoil all my fun? Wiy, auniti'', wiat a fuss you are aillkinlg about. a trifle! I cannot. 11ope here without. men1's sor-iety', TPom 1s in Germiany, tIle sea dlivicles us, and lie is welcome to en jcoy himiself in like manner. I lowevr itere is 1no prospec't of his cdoing any hling so senlsibIle. \Vhy, I verily believe he spendics all his leisuire time wvriting to me. I get sco many letter's that I do nlot reaed half of them. And that r'e minds1 mle, 0one came yesterd(ay whenix was gettiing r'eady3 to go out in the yae lt. I haven't. read it yet; r'eally, I hlad forgotten it." When she was alone Flossie eurlod he-r dlaint y' self in a large ea.sy chair an;d laughed softly as she0 recalled( heir aunt.11's wordIs. "'I.ose Tloml,"' she repeat ed. "No daIngeir of t hat ; couldnC' t get rid of himn ' vni ii I wvantedl to.' TPheii she fell to musi'g ande a tender01 look came into hert dceep blue1 eye.(. "D ear 'Tom,"' sile n amlcred. "'I do love him. I wouldn't .g ive iml up1 for twent y Mr. Tri'eors!" lie wt. toi her desk, found tIhe let ter,. naml having a line sense0 of' personal ec:nfort sank back inIto the soft dlepths tof the chlair, and with- a b)ox of choco lates In one handc, the let ter' in the oth-' eir, b)eganl to munchl sweets and lead. At fIrst hecr expriession wvas slightly bored, then astonished, andi finally she thIrew the sweets andI letter' on tihe floor fhcing heriself face dlown on a couich antd comnmenced wveeping. Tile portion of Tomi's letter which had produced such dIre results ran as follows: "[ had such a strange and excIting adventure that [ feel it my duty to stell you all about It. You know that my hotel Is In one of the best streets here, and that from my wIndowsI can see muich of the beauty and fash ion of Berlin. However, I never dreamt of such a visIon of loveliness as the piece of feminInIty whose ac quaintance I madte yesterd(ay." At this hlossie's blue eyes opened wide, she sat up,) loosed her' h111oldn tile tchocolates, andt read on: "Tile object of my admniration sat in hera carrIage alone andc ulnatten('dedl just below my window. Suddcenly heard the ruish of a runaway horse from tihe opp)osite direction, and set' Iing 1her alar'm. I hastenedci dowvn the steps5 andt assisted hertoIIc the pav'e .ment. She smilled sweetly3 and waa a bout to speak when her' attendlant r'eturnedCt anid she r'e-entIeredl thle enar lingo al wa's rapllidly driven away; not, for'gei ting to Iltrow ime a kiss Just as she was lost, to view. "Thle wvold seemedt a blanik with Iut her" (her'e I"lossio's expression caeindignant) ; "'I found. Oil inluiry3 habt, she1 was staying at my hotel, andc '.had grounads for' hope of a speeCdy .ncc"ting. Trhat nlighlt, for' the fIrst time ~years, my deamnis were not of you 'alone, the beatiful blonlde appe)aredl to w.i' moire than once, always withl that <harm'ning smile!" "Fancy!" exclaimedl Flossie. "Today tile lot has thickened and,'i howvever' painful it may be0 foeI .*c' to hear' it, I feel it only honora ule0 thlat y'ou sholdk kniow all p)ar tieullars, and thenlc judge for' yoursnelf if I am 10 blame. 'This morning wvas seated near tile front wvindow i'eading. Keeping one eye on the street-you can easily imagino .why whien thlere camie a gentle tap at my "Thlinkinlg it was tile walter, shouted, 'Come in!' Thei (door o'pened and, to my uitter amazement, thoe atoodi the beautI ful b)londe, -all smilet and bislhes. After I had recoveree from the delicIous shlock, whlicl: thrilled me from hena to foot, I I vited her to a seat on the sofa, and then endeavored to enterta.n this fairy guest to the best of nm ability. You must not be shocked, dear, when I con fess to you that we soon becarne great friends, and that she came of her own accord and sat on my lap--" It was here that ilossie flung the obnoxious letter away from her and began to weep wildly, and was so ab sorbed in her grief that Miss Tread way entered unobserved. "Why, what Is this?" exclaimed her aunt. She bent over the prostrate form and said: "Flossie, dear, toll aunty." The girl only cried the more, but at last wailed, "That man; that wicked, false man!" "Who do you mean?" asked the be wildered woman. "'T'om! See, the letter on the floor!" Mrs. Treadway picked up the letter, put on her glasses and began to read; at first she looked puzzled, then amused, and finally she laughed out right. ilsossie raised her head and gazed at her reproachfully with tear-stained eyes which looked like wet violets, and said: "Oh, Aunty, how can you laught? The false villain! To let a strange woman sit on his lap! And I loved him so!" "Why don't you finish the letter?" asked he' aunt, with a quizzical ex pression in her kindly eyes. 'hecause I won't!" cried Flossie, springing to her feet. "Never mention that man to tme again. Where are my hat and my jacket? I am going to ride with ar. Trevor at five, and if he asks me to marry him I will say 'yes.'" At. this Miss Treaday oaly smliled. "'l'here, there! Sit down and listen to your old atnty. Nay. I in'ist, If I amal not mitaiaken you left off ,ju:4 whle she sat on his h:1Ip?" "Yest." c rird I''lo:=:e. "Ilow (-an you b):at' to speak of it?" "..itten," interr.-.ted Miss Tread way. Flossie, awcd by the uanareus loitcd severity of lone, obeyed. "She catmte down of la0a' own CeIor'<l and sat on my lap. "ortunatIely I had a box of sweets and I was offer inlg her some whenl there 'amel( IIn other tap at the door. I'uIt ing her hastily down, folr I did not. wish to Ie ('auglht with a young lady in my arts, I opened the door, and there stoad a sout i-'te;anh atur1se wit a high whit cap and apron, who asked anlxiOtsly i' "' l)Ptite \ladetmoiselle Ii'le" was w\"ithint. Ad ilossie, she sternly reprimamlted my armar for (Ilte'ing a statange gent l' maan a laltmil) m; ain it'e .:. :'t,., rha !t'd 'ih len- tI bilhondie aw :. I tar'' v;,:t. by th N: ay, was just ihrce y'ear's oitd, at( it w\: as'(I11 a (a1tby carriage th!at I :ussistl' he' the (lay befaore!" 1ly Ihis l iit i l!orie lad ('n:sed1 to weep and. ,aaought muctth abl)ash:edl, she could not r'eta'ainl fr-ol joii,ing intl her anit's laugh. "I.Flossie," said Miss Treadway, later on, 'how dot you like the idea of Tom's fliritig? Ant I to believe 1 heard a tmaidlent say not lonlg ago t hat site wvishaed he wouald tease het' as he tused to do. HIow dio you enijoy it?" "Spare tme!" cried F'lossie. "Y'oua knowv I dont't like it. Oh, I wish we cotuld go away fr'om haere. Ma'. Ta'e vor's attenitionis are so tmar'ked, andc thte worst of it is I nowv realize that I am toa blame." "Whlat do you say to a tr'ip to Gea' mnty, for inlstanlce?" said Mliss Treadi wvay. "'The veray thlig," cr'ied Flossie, all smltIes. And thec next wveek founad them a boundt for' thte Fathaerlamia.-Ne w York Newvs. Whena thte 20th c-eatutry (Ipenled thter" was a genecral tnotiota amontg tihe v'a r'ious tbhua'ches of the wtor'ld thIatI a spte 01ia1 jubalilee funatd shtould h(ie r'aised to marktl(I a the new na'a. Thtis ha~nsrinc(e orystallizedi into ( ('ontcerted actiota. thea t'estults of whbich aare astontirlhng. 'Thle sttmf agreed uapotn was $50,000,0)00, thte lame to expire with the year' 1902. The Methtodist Epiascoppl church'Oi Nor'th has securted $17,000,000, thte Cana aeani Methodists one and one-fourtth millions, the EnglIsh Congr'egational ists over' $3,000,000, the several Met ho dist commnunions of England over five and a half, and the English flaptists and Canadian Presbyterians each a mil lion and a quarter'. These great riums have ben raised ovet' iand abocve thte uasual expenses andc inlcomes of these churct'hes, ando wvill be devotedl to e:rtra fields in the churcht work. If the true meanintg of tihe worda jutbilee, "joy," be comtmensuaate wvlith tIle purchlasinlg power of these great sums, the "jubilee millions" will ('ause many a jutbilate to thrill uap fronm thou a:andls of sad hear'ts long atnmb Ito suc'h sta'ains of gladniess.--Newv Yotrk flea InI an ar'ticale by: llene IBa'ite ittn the D)ecembe lae'I'ear'son''s maagiaate, enltit led "Unaclie' Samn's Pocrkel taook," t hac r :aa*ione soutt'(s atndttE(t a utt os (tthe itncomet aad ex pedlittt''CIiture- the Uiteat Stes governmltlenlt tate expainhed, atnd amaonag themt are naltat ally sotae odda e:pens~es whtIh it is dli ficualt to c'lassify; fot' ina stantt('e, th "te''xpense ofSC Oth e It'easuryI duraaintg thie sattme yeua' intcludeId $1 2,1)20 f'or' c'atchllig couterotfeiter's, $59-i5 fot' prtotectintg thec salmnon fisher'ies of Alas Ikit, $14',950 fot' suapplieos fuarnishied to keep Alaskan anatives fr'om starvintg, $75,388 fot' tile suppaort of thte Nationtal Zoo ait Watshtington1, $414, I4 fotr hatch ing fishes at'tIfial ly, $21,517 for' htead-. st toes for' soldler's' gr'aves anad $10a3, 083 fot' -ar't ificlal I libs. Ever'y soldiier' or sailor' whio htas lost anarm ortl 1 leg in war', whten flghtintg for Utncle Sam, Is enltit led to a wooden limnb of the best paattetrn, Or' ani equaivalent of its coset itn atotney, ontce in thraee years.'' An Outy ChIl. it ts mote difficualt to br'iang uap an only chtildl thani a lar'go family, 'how ever wvise the mnot.her' Is. Too mutch cat-e is inavar'iiably spent upjonl It--caro that wouald go r'otamd attIn he more~ than enouitgh for' htalf a dozeat wee brother's and sisteras. If possill an on11y 0110 shtould go early to schtool to letan to find Its owni levol, or It wvill be apt to gr'ow uap with ideas fat' to mnatutre fot' Its years. Never let stuch a child hear Itself I discussed or its ailents taiked abouat, tor it wvill, ten to one0, grow uip a litt-lo .hvnneh.rndra nnd a mas of nerve.. PIIILOSOPI1Y OF CROWDS ADVICE FROM AN EXPERT ON HOW TO GET ALONG. Good Nat uro IM Alwnya Eontal n1 - Tbile Propor Way to Iiasi to usa 1 sn,itta si ue to Cn?troe I tIl \ aot Troi,la - C<r. root Iotlt1o i- of I'tatin ; ana t .1.1bleiag. Crowds furnish nourishing food for philosophy. It takes a philosopher to appreciate them to the full. Take a sup posititious case: Suppose that you are tightly wedged in a sharp-cornered mass of struggling humanit-y, a musician of the Wagnerian school playing the anvil chorus on your right ribs, an able-bod led pantomimist performing the )evil's Tattoo on your left ribs and a stren uous anatomist taking liberties with the small of your back. Unless you can view life from a broad aspect, you will revile fate. If you are a philosopher. however, you will congratulate your self that you are there and proceed to square the score against your fellow men by taking it out. of the man in front. If youl are ingenious you will even have a little balance left. to your credit, provided you go about it in the right way. In a crowd, the man in front is fair game. Those in the very front row alone are helpless and it is only right that they should pay the penalty of their sulprior position. It is not gi\ en to any class of men to have thinl;s all their own way. It has often been remarked that crowds are good nattred. They are. A crowd will break every cigar ill a man's pocket and laugh good-naturedly while doing it. A crowd will step merrily over ta select. collection of reluctant. fect with the happiest good nature. A (lOwd will tear Ia m1an's clotties. carry away his parcels. squeeze the la:;t gasp ofl breath out. of his body and Ilien black his eye, all withl the utmlost good nal tire. 'The man who suddenly :top.; In a1 crowd':led procession has a ni c hot. pla' e below picked out. for himI. I will get a warl reception fromll his victims who have gone before. It is a curiots fact in the phc'nomena of crowds that the man who suddenly stops in front of yol invariably carries an 11mb1hrella. They are without a doubt the d('scencd anho of ihose knights of (u(i who travel ed at'ottnd the cotntry with couched lances. It is even mote curious 1( note that thc' sharp s? (el end f I he stop per's utbrella is always io;inted at sote vtlnerable par of V,me povrm1 , preferably the face. The stopper stops. The umbrella is diiven home with a deft handed jab, Irai ned t rough iong experience. 'Tihen the situation becomes ('Ven 1nr01e ctriols, and the enstuing language might. be called quaint with its black letter text and illuminated cal,itals. As had as the man wy h1o ips is the m1.an woic ilsis:F noon proceeding. 'Th'is man is always behind you when tihe anatomist is absent. lie is evidently a man accustomed to overcoming insup erable obstacles. lie is an irresistible force. Nothing can stop him. Ile will wvalk up your hack as calmIly as though it wvere his own front stepls. le wvill br'eathe noisily dowvn your (colltar. WVhen you turn around to remonstrate with him, lie will squirm in front of you with a joyful ejaculation. Then all is well. 1He leartis experience from tihe stopiper wvhiRe y'ou p)laiyfuilly labor tin (der the impreC'ssi t hat his batck is your front steps. Yotu have himu there and it is yotur own fault if yotu do not. give tilm ai mlemorab)le lesson. The mani whlo steadily Ipushles is an other titne ch ant cr. tIe places hiis shioutlder agaist yourit hack. uillIs his hat (down ovesr his eyes, grits his teeth, gets a gocod hold( with htis feet, and putsheCs. Ju lst. pushesi. 10verlast ingly andc intexor'ably pushes10. Whetieverc you get a womtiani in frot of(I you ini a crtowd you wilt get a pttstier btindt. 'Thle wom1ani w'.il t Iearfully3 cobje'ct. "hiey, thlere, biehiictndte! you wvill say, "I..ady in frcnt Cheese It ! Alt the re51spos you wvill get wvitl be a reniewved pressutre. There is only one0 thitng to do and(1 that. Is to swing your 1hee1 hack andc let the pusher have it hot andr heavy on the shinis. You mlust do this good naturecdly, buit. not the less emphatically. 'The putsher will al ways tretaliate, not necessarily for pur 1)oses of revenge, but merely as evi dlence of recip)rocal good nlature. He will probably knock your hat over youtr eyes or flip it far away with a polite "E0xcuse me." He wvill be sure to do one of these thintgs, so if you are wvise you will oper'ate upon his shins thoroughly wvhile you are about it. Thte nman wvho smokes in a crowdl has a hard time of it. "'Phew,"' the man11 ont the right will say. "Rot1tell, isni't. it ?" the mani don the1 left wvill r em ark. If' you ar'e sensible you wvilt wiggle beindi a onte of 111011 atnd pusht thle hot endc (if Itie cigar agaitnst hiis neck, l:caug goodl-natutredly meanwhile. That wilt tecach tiim not to he so ftree with htis (<'ll icismis in thce ftutre. AtI ihe' ame i'li.nr yout mulst the car'e itt or 01ye. when'f y.out have' tput th1e ciitar Suddenllily j''rk his head Iback ani d ram sideraible distancce. .\lanyl smo(ers have lea(dtlld to chewc~ in isl way1. You5 are.t not to be cnit idc if youl have friends in a crowvd. 'Thlis i; on ar1utt oif the untconilVetionial style' in whlich Itiey will reea (ithlbeirI iden'tit y. Yottr friesnd wilt edge ltp un)1 tilh is just, beh 1)in the iman behind1 yout. UnI cder or'd inary cir5cut51tanice lhe wvould( say, "lIellIo, t here, 1ltill!"' Ilt. thiis is not prope(r etiquIet te itn a crowd. Ytourt fiend wvilI rill his ptapri tip hard. Hie willI then recht ove'r thle tman iln front Iof lit) and1( good -tnatutredly3 swat. you 0one 01) thle side of their facd--a regul Jar Itooth-shaker. Thien tie will humor ouily hide himself behitid the'manit ini fronlt of hilm, whto will smiile widely at this delicate little ph asantr'y. The lhani(Ces are that you will qilckly turn at.mndlc atic 5o catch tis strannger re miilscent ly gr'inning. Noatuiral ly, you will swat him) 0110 back for' luck. Many iterestt intg little col1loquiles have been1 sitrteId ilht his maltnner. Not wvit hstand(ing the dtrawbacks clue to thle e'xerssive goodt natture of the0 criowdts, a phtilosopherCi (an alwvays fInd much pleasure' thecreini. Ire should go armed withI an tumbtrelta. A tIlh.uthtfl man can do muc14h with tin urr birella. When the stopiper In frot suitdenly atona. a trueo jhilosophter Wilt. mnakn~ no bones about it, but will simply boro a hole through the stopper with his um11 brella. 'l'his feat is poptIlarly called, "stopping the stopper." \When the maln behind waxes objee tionahle the philosopher should ilpar tially bore anot her hole through Iitm. When boring holes hecomes mlonoton o1s diversion 111ay be had by reaching over witl the umbrella and lknocking hats off. A high hat, properly cotisid ered, will furnish much quiet amuse mcnt. To all r('m11onStr'aic'es the philoso pher shoul(d make one reply: "I beg your pardon, my dear sir. Perfectly unconscious of it, I assure you." 'I'hat good-natured remark will carry a manl far in a crowd.--New York Evening Sun. "WATCH SICKNESS" IN CITIES. HO w Many W'tchoen Aro Afrectedl by Ele-ctricity. Watches, especially those of the higher grades, are suffering to nlo small etcnt. fron an1 up-to-date mal ady, magnetization, and the service:: of the doctors for their ailments are neei'd in proportiot: to the itroduce (ion of electricity for light, and trae tion. Doctors in watc'hes of the lin (st make, say that it it1has happened tha't a dozen timtcepieces Imve leen brougtiht to their re'paitrlug couiterS in one dlay, "knocked out" by electric cir'rents. Of late much of this has 'een ascribed to the in(rod tc'ti o of eleC('trie traction onl the system of the .\lanhattan railway compay. 'I'lTe in flience of such traction on withes 'ni the surfac' rota<ls hccain appimr eilt as soon as the cable systen was supplantted by ov!'rheadc and unider grouncl trolleys. ''he inuinc'nce of electricity on Iilmi'pieces vats discovered about 15 yea's ago, whiehn so-caillc'd noi(n-m1an netIIzable watc'hes were ml ade for electrical engineers and other. who we'(. brought into coilt8 withI pow\' crl'ul electr'ica.l mac'hinery, and :t was usual to ask a i::itor- to such idactes to leave his watch catsile the huili ing. Such wtlc'hes had heit Ian11ice of silver or platinum alloy, aitl the )imlnce spring' of ';old or patl!aliu11n. the 11se of steel i any part of the watch being avoitled. llt such watch es wi' indifferent recorder:; of ilhro nology, and tioon1 wore Ouit. InI this city 12 yeatrs aigo the aIvamc . in the utili'ation of eleiicityv was millied by "watch siciknc-ss," and l tis 'aime to be estahpli.liiti beyond a dt,lit iiih'i- w\,trcs out of gear were Iak rn to be leaned or relaired anid noth ing ws f<.lunl to be the matter with the11 except mag-netization1. 'T'his led at first to the trale em liy!nt" anl explrtr inl elec'tririty and (hion(gtirapils to treatt all w'atches ule mlnorali'e(d by electriity, but. tw yetirs later the princital firms found it mor 1e ad)vantage ouiS andl eroinomic1(al to in :tall a dettiagnetizinig device tl acljtinct to their repairing and clean itig Ilatts, intler the charge of an ex per. Tihe demagnetizer is a simple sei"nutitl apparatis, to whliich he siel wat%.1h-1 is exipoised. Whlten thte w.ate is (d.raw%n away firom it, the evil inftu eneie is left with tiIhe mach(lineC, atnd tht t timeipiece is restoired to hietalthi. "'I do ntot btel ieve," said tan explert il thte emptloy3 (If onte of tIhe 1110s1 linpIot tant ('ellneerns Int the Uinied State: '"that anfy onet 1not ini il busintes kntows how~ capiriecius watches are it tegar'd to1 elect ricity3. Womtteni atr ntt 'in it' withi wiatchtes when it ((ome: to freakishneni. T Viu mui uma M (tut together wvith wvatenes of thll samte gradle, an11d (Inlly one of the timtte pieces will 'catch' mattgneti/.t ion., wtchel ma gnet ized and1( cdemagnletize<i wiil develotp the tailmi. somietimie the next. day3 it is won. No watilel n-agntetized ever' lituhy ireciovers n~ ilh (lit demtagnet iz'at ion. 'lThe unmaIlIgnlet izatible wthel otft hgIh grade tand( ftautlt less perftormantce has1: not yet beet mtadie. Suchl wtatches exist, anid ills 'do: ' thIey ar te not good t imekeepers Of (coursA a sc('l,t ible watch ma: le kelit. i;ut otf electii intliences it til 1udin ra ubber bag, biut wheni i ecmes to thtat better do wvithlou watches. Devices to priotect watchel es, suich as hard rubber cases, at' many, but no wvatch is thotrough I; protectedl by thetm, event without chain. And a watch wvith a stee chain in such cond(itionls would get a 'sick' as one laid on a dlynamc There's nothing to be (lone, outtside a tustinig to street clocks, or suecl chanee information about the fleetin, houtrs, bitt to watch your watch clos( ly atnd when it dlevelopts the tup-to-dlat, malady to take it to the dloctor. Som day a nGn-magnetiztable wvatch of hlig grade that will keep goodl tine will b prodluced.--Newv Yor'k Times. l'nperll Shimuperm for'C iueto . A queer ltiprovemtent Is being ix tr'odueed in hotels in Europe. It is I ftrishitl ever'y guest (on his atrrival wit sli ppters madice of ll apetr. Th'le soles ar or past eboarid and the r'est. is mlad of whl ite otr brown paperch, st itchled wit hecavy cot toll prieventItig te(aring, Thet ptensive is4 madlie of ant ext itt goi:d qua ity' of wh'lite pa11pet'. The c'heapstCt mttdie ofI (oWoo br1)1I owni strtaw~ ppir. i'v: ry gtuest. An aIttemputt 1i bing it puitblic instItittionis, as tey wioulit: !lrevenlit e of ointaglit.l sinice cacti i:i as8 siton as tIle wearer has donie wil heam. Itiin Aunuwer Waii l'ecly. It is related that a wit it Wat ervilI college (tnow Colby), of' thle c'lass of 'di onte moint'ifg r'ead iln te class;roomt spar'kling essay. Pr'ofessor' Alatin Antdersonl, afterwaird thle faled priofC snir of lRoihester' lJiIver'sity, kn towil or suispecting it to htave been eibb ftrom 50ome pubi pIIIrii asked as r'eader sat down: ''Is thait essay ori~ nal, Mr. Jlones?" "Whty, yes, dr," a Jotnes, wit h imtper'iturbable eoolne'ss u41 that. pastebtoard look whticht Ite alwa wore; "I suppose(t5 It is. It hadl 'oigln over' it in the ntewspapeir I took from."-Argonautt. A D)istinction. "Our son is always needIng moncg said the youtng man's mother. "No," said the precise man, doesn't needl it. Hie merely wants il .-Washington Star, A Y Captain Leonnrd. Oh. I will be a sailor hold. Anid sail the stormty sea I'll be an adniral, i ihintk, 1'11n Sure it woumld suit mne. I'erhlaps I'll lie i pirate it o, And hoist a flag so black; 0', p'rtps, I'll staind and hold the wherl, And "bring her round" or "tck." Of course, i'll find some hidden gold In one far desert isle; .I'll often "seud before the breeze" .in itite tihe prouper style. Then,iii wheni I've inaden fortuitti great, Isharll, of c"turse, r'etire, Allid *. ;i long y:at.' a titt nlly lieit a roaring ire. l'erhaps you'd b;e to i:-'on ju't r w.l:: I'tn going to do all this? It's 'cause l'v got at nIte boat l'ronin riiv dear 'neic" Ch iis. And it l've .ut-h n sp'.itl shi;, \\'hy, then. it stent.I ttn'. T1hat I umst he a sai:or hl d \\ hen I'mn a manl. youl m.. --'hicago Ierord Il^":ai"1. H0WTh EY QUAR R MD1 llety ttt Joan ludulnatu're!e:l :ttti matdr up :iid wie r now loiking ;t o:i h ( ther with glow"ing: f'ates. "Isni't tinaking upl nw I'ut ti th-':" ::ih! .Jo:tu, giving her f'ritnl : ralptut~!u: kIss. "Isn'I it, thou gh. .inst':" i -tre tl I:M I'. reltrtitlag tlt' kiss entuItsiistittlly. TIhe"n the"y .tod l me"k ::t-l g:ized :tt each other'. Sinbtleny .lu:+u t :Intltd herht'llllds softtly _I,tthtr. "W\hat is it':" askewd 1-tty. Missing ilusband Ani Amrit'enn: i wonin jprotectZs the sistt'r'. "Leti''s quarirel and1( then amake up ago in Itf's hot s!im.re l'un Itu:n 'Ctchl nu', Itoinu.' and11 'Itun lHound, 110osy.'" "G(oodi! good'"' cied ieltyt. "It is JItst sI)ltild! ti ut wha t'l11 we ulunrei'I '"Oh, 11' ayhing. Coll names, and. oilwi mu lst stait eveii. I'll dro01 my1 hand-ii Ser'chiief."' Tlhtey x (teped bac 'k axnd maOde thlir 1 facets as ser'ious ais possIlile. As ithe i han idkerc'hie I t ouchied thle ground they .)began I to ('en li e most1 teril name111 lts I they !oulld thinik of'. lit, enhrliously entouigh, neither of themi appeared l('t to get v'ery aingi'y; one coubil almo1st iam n glne they were usIng all theIr self 3 con.trol to keep from iaughing. S"WVhy don't you get mad, Betty Law e con?" asked Joan at last, despera1'ftely. "Why don't you? I only said( 'cat' wheni you got reaflly and1( trutly mad1(."' "'And I only eniled yout '8pltflre.'" .. "It's awful hard to get sur'e enough a mod, lsn't It?" asked Betty, as they bjoIned hands and( raced nertoss the S Anid J1onnt's sweet face(' grewV a lIttle h serious1 ais she an isweredit'. "Some1tlime(s." e -liengo Itttordl-1 liraild. Rtain JLore'. TIhe wea'i ter Is ai most importanmt conisideram'tIon, bit, owing to I te foci t hat scine ha'ls not y'et dIiseov'eretd the4 P lows of' r'ain. men(1 ore unhit:te to fore 1 telI It for aniy co n siderablhe piodi'0. I llentci' thiert' aret in lise manyui lIsts of d we'aither' w Irlomi 1by wlh t' rail of d rin j is l lupposedt to lie gov'erned,. 'r "Thelu f st'r thle r'aIn, t he pmuleki'r the ni' hiold IupI'' is ai piec'(e of weauther lore I datin lg :is farii back as5 Shaokespmeare's h rily. for ini "'tic'hard I I." (net 2, scent 1), .'tiihn0' of lunt ls repriesenIted ns ?1ay'mig: "l'or v'iolent firies soon buirn out t hem he selves. Smiali shoiwers last long, boutI sud -,, deni sltrm.. arei' shior't." a A futhieriti idl:gei' Othell subhject re s."'Thie shariper thle blast, boein fromi lim hu iiuii'iial aisso'lated' sh diiny3 shower'.'' Althoiughi it is iald tohle of shorltui darn tlonm, It Is ani indlent Ion Iliat It will ri'xr on' th Ile foll owinlg d1ay x aot 1the so im houri. A tnong~ te11 numeri'1 rhyme llts, thIei one' Is (urren ''4in some00 of' thle mtidlamui counti'es oif Engla'nd: ''A smtiishiny shoer' Never'c Inst ball Ian hiour.'" Theire Is ai popmuh te funecy thait r'a I on Fi"i'i 103 uIsures ai wet Slunday,' super(st ition-emb)odie'd In the famlla rogmanet "A rainy Fri<lay, a rainy Sunday; A fair' Friday, a fair Sunday." Another Version of this rlyme saylS "As the Fricla.cl, so the Sunday; As the Sundat, so the week." Sitlday's raiu Is in manuiy places re rarded as 1 he foi eruulner of a1 rallty week. In Norfolk it is coinonly said: "Raini afore C4hutch (churh ) liain: ill the weel:, Little or" ntchl." Ran lin sIr1igtime is leglded :IS !t "'A wet tpring, a <lry :irvest. The possibility of forel'lling ]-,ilt Iby )lb$erVation of Ile sky is re'rre'd to n the following rhylies: "1:\v :Iing red amid bnlIiing sr:' Will cpi eed t he t rave|er nil his way; Ev, -ning; gray and muorning re<d WNill biring downi rain upon)r his heatd." "A redl night s th icc r' chl"ighl : .\ re<l in rning is lIe id.iilr. . w.i4iig.'' "A 1":rcnh, \w at Inighn is th' >ichhenl': de. hb;ht: A r:aliblc)w :t; ,n"nulingt is ther shit-pilivnt " Iiin l .- s v :I. cuil he t ' 1ieren.". \Iaiy ofI Ihl.- chi::rn:s u edl by c"hibdtrc'n c :tl'c rta ) : 11'1re e 1.'i nS . ThI; win . is ajll .t4 'l cc ' l . t:tt 1 i" r lr 44 l41 1 1 trrt44 I ill c'.4 ' .1 \""j.h ;l I i l i c 't. ;l'r : i.. . :' .* .:c '. . c c w ' A 11 . .1 4 n 1.h rl :, \\ hen:,: lc i : :': lc.' \: lc l tihc i b il l = : 1 4.4 il 1!, I.c1 il.c4l4:t "I,cS4ti In~~~~ ;1t11 hi h en u '111a" hea d p . , 1 :n.\ : i:: I W a I t icllows: . nl :\ Il i. :r b in , . li i44n;:444 :4 '14:424n pre':ih-nii to ini Ii' at c l14cl . aI clIes i i i cblliini twr1 and Sister Pnzzle 1'} \n.44eien.4n flag. F'hnd her husband and narVy hoops44 1is (evident, says3' thle Nov Yor'k II('rald(. but how'. they enn4i 14h4 an4 lsr i n3 )1144P Iit Iluis long been apu zi'eh to ima ny olf their p ehlers. Tlrue. II r'e piit'e 4 sein(1e sk Ill to kee swerv'iniVlg frin th Ile r'i.ght pathIi, bu11t sue1( s4kIll is rath1141 easIly n4e<'(1ired,1 :1 4 therefore(l44 It 1s s4)4iewha144I t stranige i hn chl4(4ir wh ar ~4e experts in thle nr shiolild ('jitontie to) ioll hnops and44 4p pariiently enjoy4)3 theiinS'Ieve (jInite 44 much1444 as lhiri le'ss 4k illed1 brolthr I an5 41 44ister's. Whleltheri th~ey will 11hal equ444 enjoymnent r.ol)11ing a4 hoop31 441milar1 1 thle one shown in th Ile :i(e0ompany43'in A novel' a ffair it 111s, since ((erta1 synees'4 4 'l are hrred' off inl it, am4( lies I) contaIn lIttle ball11s or tr'inketsq, wll mahike a1 pI'leasant jinigle whenever'4 Ith hoop41 Ia set 14n moItlon. Here, at an;1 ra4te0, Is at geuinie toy', not a mere cir(41 of w'.ood1. lIn a Imniter' of' this kind1(, howevel ch141(1ren ar ie thle 44014 airiters1, nnd( ('0r s4'leluetly3 with themi(I rests the fate U wVomen Elevator opeiratorn. Fromiii Ilistonii (comes14 the n1ew..s of n: imiiova:tilon ini th form 10f4 th' le woma0i44 4'4lev 444 (j or '4 praor'. An 44(illn ini 4 ('(4n if 144 hiouighit 1 ihere1 was4i any43 likeIlihoo o)f ele'.ntor34 girils 1(or New Yor'k. "'I' Tere 44rien't an y1e43' h'''le said1(, "hu)4 lhe. Of )course a'('4 giril couin4't ruin thi sorit (of ('ari thait. hias to lbe haul41ed u 4444( dlown 1by iiini stirengthi with rope44, b44t 4nnoy of3 th 4le ('arIs the(se (144 Ira vel Iithroghi(444 (h.ienn' wll 41( (4t more4'( storie4s 11i4nIhT 4l !0 oi'(441rol of ny. 1.\4444 'win i! l4 clos th wor .'(4k, a41 '441 hIbt '4onhi 414 41he phys'~ienH1 part of' .4' wei 445 ::'ybody13. The4I opera'ti e.imply3 1hs to) have' a lev'.el head4(, m4 L.4' he 'he:l's 44 girl's, It. 4 ,Isj st '4s **( as5 4 hou1ghl it wer'4" a4 man44's, isn'tI it? New'. York News. I1ia InIgnaition. ''Aren'4't you1 sonesimes4404 a little 00 41dvaning1st yo('u' iti of44 the44 pul' ?" gbumRl. '"Look at4 the n40n (of geit the 14114 pub i hs p4erilled'( 14) 4414ar I ,oek att thle heroes w.vhose sneiile 44re( nOt ne(kno0wled1ged even(4 biy a talbi (If stone1. An4y lie iing I 'nn4 (10 t ward4i'( gettIng even04 w..ith thRe 1u)11) gives 1m1 slucer'e muoral satisfactIon," WnshIngtnn Stinr. To purify large quantities of water in case a tilter is not obtainable it is a good plan to use alum, for this will cause all impurities to sink to the bot tom, when the clear water at the tol) may be poured off and will be fit for use. One tablespoonful of alum will be required for four gallons of water. It must be stirred in thoroughly and then ' allowed to settle. (rnstto Ie'i TicklnC. 1'ach season sees the addition of new and more elaborate designs in bed tick ings. It is said that the vogue for this material in such ornate patterns was originally occasioned by the pub lieity of bed chamber paraphernalia, which the arrangement of the modern alpartment rcn'enrs almost unavoidable. lieds and pillows cannot. always be guil1ed and shammed, and the simplest thling was therefore to render them artistic ('Ven In (eshalt1bilit. Some of the ilew designs in I ickling hear the names Allit', l.vanogeline. I The Baroness, while the Kate (reenaway has tiny land set"'. eatit'red abult ovet it ill Japan 'se fashioln.--New York TribInie. 1.am1p 5hrntles ('trc i n sa 1tti ty. ('henille is everywhere this season. :ven h1im11) shades are now garnishe'1l with it, or evin maeto of it. Some dain ty eancdelabtra shades atre of pinked and pleated white china silk as foundation, wit , (1n(111le entds of pink falling over it ;() closely as to w\'holly cover the silk. Each length of chtnuiile is finished with a tilly sil v r or gold head or button It( give it s:;lli("ieti weight to keep it ill place. e head:; reach just below the 1inlled tlge of the white silk, and the top ends ot the chenille are caught alouit I th neck oI the shade with a rope of wisted strr,nla knot.ted on the outer or "show " side. The effe'ct of the wholo is hic and lainty. ant gives inl espee ially -(oft <quality to the light. diffused through it. TEl :t lUntistrs .i ('irt. The h t th1ooml closet is usually (11wded wit It hout los and packages, hut it, does not often have exactly the as sortnllent Oful''ldicines anld appiiatesc calledi for itn emievgeicies. Clear out th' ol sttuff, half-emptied bottles, ete., Once in a while, says the New York I'( st, and see that there are always to handt it e simple remledies most often necledtd in the fa ily. Ammnonia, witch hazel, sweet. oil and 1ime water shoult4 he there. and a onie per vent solutiea of carbolic acid with which to hat'o wounds and scratches. If a cut. is first hathed in calholle and th1en1 painted with collodion there will be little bleedi ing. The sweet oil and lime water, which the druggist. will mix in exactly the right. proportions Is the best of remedies foir a bunrni. Add to these a tteet. box of absorhlent. cot.ton, a roll of anltisei)tic haandages and a hot water bag, and1( thel closet will be ready for ordinary accidIents. A Tasle for then Conk. Thle followving table snotuld be pasted inl everly housekeeper'"s cook book: Four (een fenspoonifuIs lIquid miako 'lThree e'ven teaspIoonf uis dIry material 1m1ake (11e1'even tabhlespoonfu(tl. Six teeni tabllesp)Confuils liquid mlake Tiwelv~e tallspoont'uls dry material Two culis m1akie one0 pInt. - One' dozenP i'ggs should( wveigh 011e and( t'se-One teasp)oonlful sodait to one iiupIul molasses50. SOne teasp(oonf ul soda to on1e pint1 sour1 1:1milk. Thrlei'e t easpoinfuls bIaking p)owder to 1 (italart of tlouri. SOne-hatlf (lupfull (of yeast or one-quar ter enk(e c.omparessedl yeast. to one pint liquid. One teaispoonIful extract to 0on0 loaf pIlainl (!ake. One teaspoonfual salt. to two quarts of floutr. 0110 tealsponfuil salt to one quart of One scant cupful of liquid to two full cuplfuils of flour for bread. One scant cupful of liquid to two ftull cuplfuils of flourl for muffins. One scant cupful of liquid to one full cuipful of flour' for batters. One quart of water to each pound of meat andi bone1 for soup1 stok. Four pepper corns11, four cloves, one teaspooniful mixed herbs to eachu quart of wvater for soup1 stock. Tist IBarnanas-Put four tablesponfuls iof sutgar in an aigate pan (aver the fIre; 3when It. is hot, slice in six peeled( ban -anas, ('ook1 IIlive mites andc ser'vo with Ssplonig ([ake( or ligers. Panned Oysters wvith Celery--Put in-~ to thle (haflig di1sh onie abalespoona of tbuttter', and whleni allt ed add one( 1heap1 ting tablespoon 01 (chopped( (clery', half a teaspoonu of plapika, half a teasp)oon of salt, andl the juice of half a 10em(on: when very hot add( 0110 init of oysters picked over and cold1 watIer poured0( over them (a oo0(k unt11il the edges curl; add 01one 01u1 of cream11, and( whenO hlot serve ton toast. \tAlayle BiIscuit-Measurel' a quart of .I sifted flouir add to it three teaspoon fls iof hakinig polwder and( a little salt ail i sijft a ':l'heni rubh two table spoon 1fuls oIf huat t er wvelI through the flour withtl a spatutla or flexible knife; ' 11 he 10uces (of tIhe iscIIOt depends(1 onl th lac(are witht whuich thIs is (1011. StIr ~. In (enoughl sweet 1rich mil1k, about.a pint, 'e to make11( a(11oftdough. At this point i did a cup1 of 15aaple suiga' emut into r- )peces about thle size of p1e11. Turn is out the dough on~ a floured board, ', dredge J.t lightly with1 flouri, roll out 's quickly until aboult an1 inch1 th110k; cut it oumt with a. smiall biscuit emtter, two -inches In diameter, and place thorm in Ie a greased pan so they will not touch. - Bake for fifteen mninutes in a quiclc I oven. Serve 110t.