The Bamberg herald. (Bamberg, S.C.) 1891-1972, July 25, 1901, Image 4
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*. .
mm " *VHY
DO,YOU
i
j^gr; ?- Uh man with eager eyes '/\ . ^ 1
V; Why do you hurry so?
In vour haste to gain the prize ? i
\ou miss much as you go; *You
hear no song birds sing.
^Nor stray in flowery places;
You never stay to bring
Glad smiles to weary faces? '
Whv do vou hurrv so?
-- Oh
star a little, stay! 1
Why do you hurry so? ' .
There are blossoms along the W3J
That never again shall blow;
The grave is at the end
Of the way that you are taking? T
Stay a little, friend, ? '
And soothe some heart that's aching?
Why do you hurry so?
Bg|b: *
I 1 Mrs, Lati
? ?yT N SCONCED in the depths of <
==/ her big arm-chair, a smile
~~^ lighting up her line old fac? <
that her white hair framed j
with a crown of snow, Mrs. Harmon
was considering her nephew Andrew, <
a good-looking young fellow of tweq- '
ty-eight, who, for his part, was consid- <
ering the timepiece on the mantel, i
whose hands were already well past ;
fhree o'clock.
"Well, Andrew, do you. find my clock '
: - very interesting?" * t
In some confusion the young man <
1^:: stammered an excuse, but she went \
on:
"Now don't deny it, you naughty fel- i
low. You wanted to know If your visit 1
had lasted long enough for you to take i
S&v- your, departure decently." 1
"Not at all, aunt. Your guess is quite ]
r T 1 u ..I . .
wrong, ior j. iia\cui ixie siigmcsi uiKntion
of going yet But why do you 1
j&f keep a regular sun-dial like that in i
j?i your drawing room?"
"Perhaps because I was born so long ]
jj|- ago that it is 1 and not the clock that 1
v. . is behind time. But come?instead of 1
; ; criticising my drawing room, tell me i
If. what you are going to do when you 1
^ leave here."
"In the iirst place, I am not going to i
:.: leave here for some time; but when I
| have wearied you with my presence 1
g > until you cannot stand it any longer, 1
it will be tigie for me to go to Mrs. i
Bp* Baton's tea." 1
"Mrs. Laton?Pauline Laton?" 3
^ "The same."
"Ah, yes; I used to see her some
time ago. I remember her vaguely?a 1
Ipfci; large woman, dark " 1
"She is a blonde, aunt."
"Indeed? She used to be a brunette. 1
And so you are sighing at the feet of <<
||^ Mrs. Laton?" i
Wv- "We are all sighing at her feet." ?
? "She must enjoy it." i
- *Well, I rather think she does."
Ipt/ "Is lt fun?" 3
' "Yes. after a fashion. We are nlways
the same little circlfc of friends, (
< . and then, beside Mrs. Laton, there's a t
sister, a rather good-looking girl, and
a few other young matrons and bache- i
%' elor girls."
"And what do you do besides look at *
Bfppi^hese women?" ~ ^
? f "We take tea, we gossip and we c
gp-f flirt"
"Oh, oh!"
f ' "But my dear aunt, one must do I
something between 5 o'clock and din- I
fejp ner." - t
"Evidently; and flirting is what you *
Sglt^ have found to do?" 1
Bp/ "It's a way to kill time." 1
"I scarcely know just what you ?
mean by the term. Explain it to me." s
j| ^ "Oh, impossible. A definition for the *
1, word has long been sought, but it has 1
? not yet been found. But, given a ?
? young woman tete-a-tete with a young
man who Is not a fool, and I warrant | ?
you It won't be long before you have *
' a practical demonstration. Flirtation *
; Is a manner of becoming discreetly in- ^
' ; discreet. To know how to flirt is no 1
: ? , common accomplishment. It is a veritable
.science." d
"And is love a science, too?" t
JSt - "No; it is rather an art."
"And marriage?what is It?"
"Oh, that is philosophy."
g "Indeed? At what age does one at- s
tain this philosophy?" f
"As late as possible." I
"It seems to me that at twenty-eight ^
"Aunt, aunt!" cried Andrew, spring- *
1 ing from.his chair, "confess that you a
are concocting some terrible plot. You ?
look as guilty as a conspirator." i
Mrs. Harmon smiled a fine smile and c
enjoyed for a moment the consterna- I
tion in her victim's face. Then she
answered, after a pause: a
"Yes, you are right I wish to get
Sj|irv you married." t
"In heaven's name, what have I done
to you?" gasped the young man. with *
comic seriousness; and as the oldjady d
still smiled, he continued. "See here,
aunt, I should never have suspected *
you of such a thing. You, a woman of
Intelligence, a superior woman, de- i
scending to the-ro!?*&f 'matchmaker! a
fe?sfterrible shattering of my ^
fp Ideals." i
"Come, come, my poor boy, do not s
be so cast down. The girl is charm- J
ing, I can assure you."
"Of course," Andrew burst out, "the t
girl is always charming. Oh, 1 know c
hpr; I can see her now; she may not *
~ be exactly pretty, but as you have said,
she is charming. She dresses admira- c
bly, and makes all her own gowns, f
She stood at the head of her class in ^
school, and attends lectures now.
Moreover, she has taken cooking les- 1
sons and can put up preserves. She
plays the piano, she sings, she paints, t
and she has a tidy fortune in her own 1
right. Bah! No, a thousand times, no! <
I do not want this miracle of perfec- 1
tion. I know a thing or two, aunt, ?'
even if I don't look it, and if I marry i
I shall marry a woman who suits me. 1
But I know girls?they are all alike, i
and I know what they are and what
they are worth. There isn't one who s
suits me, or can suit me, and I shall i
remain a bachelor." <
"And you go to take tea at Mrs. Laton's,"
murmured Mrs. Harmon, be- <
tween her teeth, while a disturbing 1
expression came into her clear-seeing j
old eyes. <
Under this ironical and even in- 1
quisitorial look Andrew lost counten- 1
ance .a little; he could not deny that <
to matrimony he preferred flirting J
with Mrs. Laton. t
He was pulling himself together to s
reniv. or rather to defend himself,
when the street door bell was heard. i
"A caller, eh? Is this your reception 1
daj% aunt, or do you. too, give your 1
friends tea at five o'clock?" 1
"You arc impertinent, nephew. At 1
my age a woman does not give five
o'clock flirtations. It is not even a <
caller. I am sure it is my little friend *
Kosamond, the 'charming girl' I spoke J
^ of." i
"I shall flee, then." 1
*- you not wish even to see her?" <
"Never! Or,-if you insist, I shall go i
into this little ante-room and look at
her through the crack of the door. That
is the only concession I shall make," ]
E and the young man stepped quickly <
I into the next room as the opposite <
imflrm t ? - <
HURRY SO?
Oh inRidcn -with deep eves,
Why do you hurry sot
A world of sorrow lies
Out where you long to go;
You put your books away
And coil your braided tresses,
And. turning from wild play.
Are stately in long dresses ?
Why do you hurry so?
Oh stay a little while.
Why do you hurry so?
I see you sweetly smile. * *
And heaven is here below;"
But oh you long to flee
From youth and maiden glory,
To grieve too late and be
The pathos of the story?
Why do you hurry so?
?PluVaco Tvfvnrd.TTerfllA
3n'S imJ
iloor opened to admit the visitor;
through the slit Andrew could make
out the graceful silhouette of a young
girl.
"How do you do, Mrs. Harmon?"
said the girl, as she entered the room.
"I have brought back the little books
on the orphan asylum that you lent
mamma. May I stay a moment with
rou?"
She continued to keep ber back toward
Andrew, and he, now beginning
o get tired of the game, had about concluded
that^ she must be frightfully
ugly.
"Sit down here, dear, beside me,"
and Mrs. Harmon easily contrived to
place the girl just opposite the small
room; and the young man, approaching
his eye to the crack, was struck by the
orettv face he beheld.
"Well, Rosamond, what are you doing
nowadays? Are you going out
much ?"
"Xo, very little. I had a card for
Mrs. Laton's tea this afternoon, but I
wrote her I was ill. You will not betray
me. will you?" and she laughed a
merry laugh that set Andrew's heart
to vibrating.
"Do you not care for such affairs?"
isked Mrs. Harmon.
"Sure, Mrs. Harmon, you do not
hink it would be amusing to spend an
iour or two watching Mrs. Laton's
flirtations, with no one to talk to, but
:he insipid women and stupid men of
ler set?"
"You are severe, my child."
"Severe? Well, with a woman like
Mrs. Laton I do not think, one can be
:oo much so."
Instinctively Mrs. Harmon raised
ler eyes to the door that concealed
Yndrew, and, under pretext of arrangng
the portiere, she crossed the room,
ind, as she rearranged the drapery,
whispered to her nephew:
"It's nearly five?you'll be late for
rour tea."
But ler warning was unheeded; AnIrew
did not budge. As for the girl by
he fire, she was still full of her idea.
"Do you know Mrs. Laton, Mrs. Harnon?"
she asked.
"Yes, yes," the old lady hastened to
eply, and to turn the conversation she
vent on. "But you are wrong to deoil
OT?a TLnrn
Mlir till* I ail 1UCU U1U ClU^/tU. XUV.1V
ire some who are quite sensible."
"Sensible? Well, I don't know* them.
. do not mean that they are all stupid,
>ut they think themselves so superior
hat they are wearisome. They are
*ain, insufferable bores, with their
>lase airs and their ideas that they are
rresistible because they can flirt with
drs. Laton, who has bleached hair,
:mears paint on her face as if it were
i palette, and whose brains are good
'or nothing but to devise outrageous
fowns."
Again Mrs. Harmon cast an uneasy
fiance toward the little room, in which
Lndrew was fast waxing angry. He
vould have liked to strangle this girl,
vhose superb health, and triumphant
>eairty irritated him.
"And when will you get married, my
[ear?" suggested Mrs. Harmon, again
browing herself into the breach.
"I shall never marry."
"Indeed? Why not?"
"Why not?" repeated Rosamond, a
hadow of melancholy coming over her
ace that Andrew admired in spite of
limself. "Because I am a little fool
vho cannot do as the rest do. I would
vish to love my husband and to have
lim love me. I would wish to marry
i man whom I should single from
imong the re^t for his goodness and
ntelligence. I would wish to have a
onfidence in him, and above all to be
>roud of him."
A ? />? ?! fnAl'A oV*/1 lvo/l KnOATltn
no liic l opvac ouv uau MCCVIUW
mimated with a gentle exaltation,
vhich was not without its effect on
he young man behind the door.
"Well, Rosamond," said Mrs. Har on,
"why do you not realize your
[ream?"
"Because there are no young men
towadays who care to look for a girl
vho pleases them. Marriage for them
s a matter of business, nothing more,
tnd vhe woman herself does not count.
Chey marry when they have lost their
noney, and the little heart they posessed
has been frittered away on some
irs. Latou or another."
Again Mrs. Harmon arose, and preending
she had an order to give, excised
herself and hastened to her
lephew.
"Well, aunt, she has given us a nice
iressing down, eh? For a 'charming
jirl,' I would back her against the
vorld."
"Hurry, Andrew; it is late, and you
lave almost missed your tea."
"My teaT' he repeated. "Bother my
ea! Is there nothing else in the world
>ut my tea? Now, you must lind an
?xcuse to bring me into the room and
['11 show that young shrew whether
ill men are fools. Oh, she need have
10 fear, I shall not try to marry her,
.'or I still have all my hair, a little
noney and a heart still intact."
Mrs. Harmon could not restrain a
anile at the young man's vexation, and
ivp minutes Inter Andrew entered the"
lrawing room.
But contrary to all expectations, the
?onversation did not become a war of
ivords; on the contrary, the girl's fresh
jayety disarmed Andrew's anger at
)nce. His preconception fled before
ier dimpled smiles and her gentle
roice, and he soon fell under her
;harin, forgetting his anger in his admiration
of her graceful movements,
he penetrating timbre of her voice, the
?parkle of her wit.
The hour for the tea had long passed
md Andrew was still there. He had
lost all desire to run after Mrs. Baton,
[hat faded doll whom Rosamond?as
tie was forced to admit to himself?
lad portrayed so truthfully.
And esconced once more in the
Jepths of her arm-chair, Mrs. Harmon
smiled a kindly smile, and silently regarded
the young people, who for their
r>art, looked at one another with looks
that do not deceive and in which the
}id aunt read with joy the hope of a
happy union.?Waverley Magazine.
News paper has advanced seventy
per cent, in Germany in two years. A
German trust controls ninety-five per
[rent, of the production.
/
/
ETHICS OF ADVERTISING.
Ridicnlonsness of the Code Which Got- !
erns Doctors and Lawyers.
A writer In Publicity, presumably a
lawyer, writes entertainingly on the
ethics of his profession in so far as it
relates to advertising, and taboos the
professional man, be he lawyer, doc- (
tor or clergyman, who advertises.
It would appear that he argues
from a premise contradictory in its
statement, only to reach, as he neces- I
sarily must, an illogical conclusion, '
not warranted by the Intermediate ;
syllogisms. It is false logic, and needs
must fall.
The fact that he admits advertising
has practically become a science and
"that the advertiser?the one who has,
perhaps, maae a life study of the ben- J
efits of his own system or those of ;
other equally broad-minded men?is i
justified in assuming that every man !
has his own interests at heart, and i
that with every business man of am- j
bition the advancement of his own !
business occupies the same position, j
If, then, the advertiser believes ad- j
vertislng to be one of the most im- j
portant stages on the high road to j
business success, why is he not jus- ;
titled in his endeavor to persuade tlu !
physician or the purist that unless he |
advertises he pursues a phantom in
the fornl of legitimate personal and ;
professional fame and marked finan-!
cial benefit?"
Of course he is justified, and it is |
only the hide-bound rule of the years j
when newspapers and other vehicles
of advertising were nou-existent that !
trammels him to-day to outer into j
competition with his mercantile j
brother.
The writer assumes that there are j
many members of the legal profession
who would advertise, to the detriment
of their more conservative brethren, j
Possibly that is true. This is not the*!
age of tho tallow dip or stage coach, j
and he who falls in the race need not i
start on crutches.
The etiquette and morals of the bar
are high-sounding and sonorbus 1
phrases, but the average newspaper j
reporter with any court experience at
all knows what a sham the ethics of
that profession are, and that free ad- j
vertising is eagerly sought for by the
highest counselor or by the police ,
court solicitor.
The suggestion has been made, and [
an admirable one, too, that the papers
refuse to print the names of lawyers {
or physicians in prominent cases uu- ;
less they advertised.
Lawyers furnish their briefs to
newspapers; often prepare interviews;
physicians write their own account of
difficult operations, and clergymen;
synopsis of their sermons, and the
newspaper publishes it in choice posi- j
tion without reaping a penny of profit.
The enterprising lawyer or physician
who casts aside the so-called
ethics of the profession and advertises |
may incur the ill-will of his laggard j
competitor, but he will have demon- j
strated that this is the twentieth cen- j
tury, not the sixteenth.?Fourth Es- !
tate.
WORDS OK WISDOM.
Seek happiness for yourself, and you |
will lose it; seek it for others, and you 1
will find it.
Books without the knowledge of life i
are useless; for what should books i
teach but the art of living?
It is by presence of mind in untried
emergencies, said Lowell, that the na- ;
tive metal of a man is tested.
Good counsels observed are chains
to grace, which, neglected, prove halt- I
ers to strange undutiful children.
Imprudence, silly talk, foolish van ;
ity and vain curiosity are closely al- j
lied; they are children of one family.
If one always takes a short cut
through life they sometimes regret !
they did not go the round about way. j
Life is to be fortified by many i
friendships; to love and to be loved
make up the greatest happiness of ex- i
istence.
There are two things in wmcn we ;
should thoroughly Train ourselves?to |
be slow In taking offence and to be i
slower in giving it.
Habits, soft and pliant at first, are
like some coral stones, which are l
easily cut when first quarried, but
soon become hard as adamant.
No man can tell whether he Is rich
or poor by turning to his ledger. It is ,
the heart that makes a man rich. He j
is rich or poor according to what he j
is, not according to what he has. j
How Women Met an Emergency.
A curious outcome of technical edu- j
cation for women was shown during
the past year in the case of a man
who by failure in business was re- j
duced to poverty. He had a capable i
family, and his daughters at once j
sought for situations as dressmakers j
and milliners. In the latter trade j
there was no prospect of immediate >
remuneration, as it is customary for .
the beginners to give three months of i
service, both spring and fall, without j
receiving wages. The second daugh- !
ter got a place to sew in a dressmak- |
ing establishment at small wages, and I
the father's efforts to make a living
were hampered by his advanced years, j
Then the mother took a hand. She I
had been raised on a farm and sought i
and found employment tying up vege- j
tables for market. In this industry !
the chief requisites are careful count- ;
ing and honesty, early rising and in- j
dustry. She actually made enough j
money to keep the family for three ;
months, but then she did not have to j
spend money to dress up to the si tun- ;
tion. and was paid for her work at the J
end of each day.?Philadelphia Record, j
Heard in an Open Car.
People talk in open cars with a wonderful
appearance of security. Nobody
seems to think anybody can hear in
the seat in front, or the seat behind, j
especially in the evening, and if elec- !
trie light were not as good a conductor '
of private conversation as daylight, j
Two women were running down a mil- ;
tual acquaintance volubly in an open
car the other night, when one of them I
summed up the case in these final j
words:
"He is a selfish, cynical pig."
A cynical pig would have been eag- !
orly advertised by Barnura, if he had j
had such an animal in the greatest j
show that used to be on earth.?New j
York Mail and Express.
.
Prize Fish Story.
The fish story record stands sliat- i
tered. This is the latest, and it is |
vouched for in all seriousness: In 1S73 !
a fisherman took some trout through !
the ice in Central Wisconsin. The !
largest trout was placed in a cold storage
warehouse, and afterwards for- '
gotten. Eleven years later the warehouse
was burned, and, to save the !
ice, enough water was thrown on to
fill up the water-tight cellar below. '
Three years later 447 trout were taken
out of the cellar, in addition to the
original one, identified through lack j
' of an eye and a broken tail, which had j
evidently fallen into the water when |
the. warehouse was destroyed, thawed !
out and spawned.
OUR BUDGET OF HUMOR
LAUGHTER-PROVOKING STORIES FOR
LOVERS OF FUN.
And That Settled It?A Hint?The Mighty ,
Dollar?Abstruse and Catchy?Keasonable?The
Vaudeville Dip?An Odd Cane
?He Immediately Supplied One. Etc.
The queen was in the counting house.
Counting out tier money;
The king was in his iron room,
Looking scared and funny;
The maid was in the garden,
Hanging up her clothes;
Along came a bombshell
And blowed off her nose!
?Indianapolis Sun.
A Hint.
Iler Admirer?"Love lives on hope,
you know."
She?"Yes; and one wonders, sometimes,
how It finds any!"?Puck.
The Mighty Dollar.
"Do you think the acquisition of
great wealth is a good thing?"
"I know it. Why, It makes us love
our enemies."?Detroit Free Tress.
Abstruse and Catchy.
"Here's a new book called 'If.'"
"How absurd; what are you going
to name your exhaustive work on languages?"
"I thought of calling it 'Say.'"
Reasonable.
Mrs. .Tones ? "They say bachelors
should be taxed, but I don't think
they are always to blame."
Mr. Jones?"Certainly not! No man
is always to blame until he gets mar
riedl"?ruck.
The Vandevlllo Dip.
"Daughter, perhaps If you take
more time "with your liair it wouldn't
look so rough ;?ad baggy over your
left eye."
"Time? Why, pa. It took me two
solid hours to make it look that way."
?Chicago Record-Herald.
An Odd Case.
Nearpass?"I see that a man committed
suicide because he thought -:
had outlived his usefulness."
Bennct?"That's strange. The average
victim of that complaint keeps
right on outliving it."?Tuck.
He Immediately Supplied One.
"It takes a clever man to think up
a good proverb," remarked Mrs.
Twiccwed, and then for once her
worser one-eighth plucked up courage.
"Oh, I don't know," said he; "how's
this, 4A11 grass widows are notgreen.'"
?Philadelphia Press.
Scientific.
Tadpole?'Ta, what's the difference
between a mushroom and a toadstool?"
Mr. Frog?"Oh, sonny, when a toadstool
tries to poison somebody and
can't these botanist men up and say
he's a mushroom."
________ 4
Impoverishing Family Ties.
"Yes, my little sister was a good
stenographer, but I had to get her
another position."
"What was the trouble?"
"Oh, every time I left the office she
would call out: 'Bring me some candy.'
"?Chicago Record-Herald.
Moral: Don't Drop Your G'?.
"Mamma," said little Bertie, "do ravens
have headaches?"
"Why, no, my dear," the child's
mother answered, "what makes you
ask such a question as that?"
"Well, I heard papa say this morning
that he had a raven headache."
Shrewd.
"I insist that my daughter shall
play nothing but classical music,"
said Mr. Slriups Barker.
"For what reason?"
"None of the neighbors know a
thing about it, and she can murder a
piece all she wants to, without their
daring to say a word."
Much Cleverer.
"Don't you think a woman is clever
enough to do any work that a man
can?" inquired the lady with a resolute
jaw.
"Oh, she is much cleverer than that,"
answered Miss Cayenne. "She is clever
enough to make the man do the
work and give her the benefit of it."?
Washington Star.
Meant Well, But Made Him JiervouB.
Mr. Fijjit?"Please don't send that
messenger boy who stutters up to my
house again."
Telegraph Manager?"What did he
do?"
Mr. Fijjit?"Nothing; but I gave him
a twenty-five-cent piece, and he hung
around all afternoon trying to say >
'thanks.' "?Ohio State Journal.
To Correspond.
"I wonder why," said the girl in
the pale green shirt waist, "the vertical
system of penmanship is becoming unfashionable
nowadays."
"Have you forgotten," replied the i
girl in the Gainsborough hat, "that in !
the best circles we have discarded the j
vertical system of walking and adopted
a modified slant?"?Chicago Tri- 1
bune.
His Observation.
"It is strange how often the nnde- J
serving seem to prosper," remarked
the thoughtful man.
"Yes," answered Senator Sorghum.
"I have noted such a tendency in affairs
with growing apprehension.
Every once in a while some one without
any money or influence worth
mentioning gets an office."?Washington
Star.
Prudence.
"What made you jump into the
midst of the fight?" inquired the
friend. "You had nothing to do with
the feud these men were trying to set
ne. ;
"That's perfectly true," answered
Colonel Stilwell. "But I had to take ,
sides one way or the other. I couldn't
take chances on being an innocent by- !
stander."
An Ardess Dodger.
Citizen?"I want a perfectly noiseless
lawn mower."
Dealer?"You are a very considerate
person." I
Citizen?"Yes. 1 have to be; if I
can't get up early and cut grass without
the neighbors hearing me I'll have
to lend that lawn mower seven times
before I get to use it again myself."?
C hi ca go It ecord -11 era Id.
A l'os?ible Motive.
Detectives in Richmond, Yn., according
to a newspaper, recently found two
gold watches, which had been stolen,
under a hen engaged apparently in the
ambition of hatching spring chickens.
It is believed that the thieves put the
watches there to set them.?New York
Commercial Advertiser.
A hundred years ago the largest fortune
in the United States was $2.">0,-000.
Now there are several fortunes
of more than $200,000,000. j
TRAFFIC IN WASHED CLOTHES.
Men Who Buy UncallecMor Parcels at
Chinese Laundries.
"Speaking of laundries and Chinamen,"
remarked one of the hearers of i
the story of the laundry marks, "do !
you know that a number of men here
in New Orleans make a good living by ;
buying^ up the unclaimed packages of
laundries? In New Orleans there are
205 Chinese laundries, and in each of
them many packages of laundry are
never called for. The Chinese proprietor
keeps these packages thirty days
and if the owners do not claim them
in that time they arc sold u>r the laundry
charges to anyone who cares to purchase.
Look into a Chinese laundry
and you will see several upper shelves
crowded with dusty-looking packages.
These arc uncalled-for packages, and
the Chinaman is keeping them should
the owners call for their linen, buj
the chances are that when the parcels
are put upon these upper shelves thev j
will not be cailcd for. The men who
have their laundry done by Chinese
washermen arc not infrequently birds
of passage, who, from one cause or another,
lose their laundry. The cause
may be carelessness, forget fulness, leaving
town or going broke.
"You will be surprised at the amount
of clothing lost in this way by owners
and accumulated in the laundries, i
When a week goes by and the owner
does not call with his wash ticket the
laundry keeper no longer expects him,
for the Chinese laundry patron is generally
a prompt customer with a small
wardrobe. Then, after a week, the bundle
goes up on the shelf, and it remains
there until the purchaser comes along.
He is sometimes a man in reduced circumstances
and needy, who wants to
outfit himself with another man's clothes
at a trifling cost, but generally he is a
'peculator. The Chinaman is glad to
let the clothes go for the amount of
the wash dues against them, and the
speculator strikes any number of bargains,
for generally linen worth a Chinaman's
work is worth a few cents asked
for the charges against it. These speculators
go around from laundry to laundry,
and wagonloads of goods are
bought up by him for almost nothing.
It is pretty much of a lottery, for the
wily Chinaman will not permit the speculator
to examine the contents of the
bundles before buying. He is like a
man buying a pig in a poke, and the
only guide he has is what the Chinaman
tells him is in the bundle. Men's garments
bought by speculators are sold
to second-hand stores, sailors and
negroes. Women's clothes are not often
left uncalled-for, and very seldom are
any of them left on the upper shelves
of laundries. A bundle of laundry on
which the dealer in them pays fifty cents
for the washing will net him generally
three times his outlay when he has peddled
the contents of the package. At
least a dozen men in New Orleans arc
getting rich buying up unclaimed laundry
bundles.?New Orleans TimesDcvsocrat.
TO BE EXPECTED.
Professor Dc Science?"Statistics
show that men arc growing shorter and
women are growing taller."
T ''Wt T ctnn'l- Irnnu: r>f
anything that has such a stretchy effect
as hanging on to street-car straps."?
New York Weekly.
A tsalloon Ascenslonist Killed.
A balloon aecentionit-t was recently killed
while making one of liis daring trips. Life is
too valuable to trifle with in fool-har ly adventuros.
It is better to employ ourselves in
peaceful pursuits where we may be secure.
Then if we take care of our health,we can live
to a good old age. Th* best means of promoting
health is Ho^tatter's Stoma-h Bitters.
This mfdicun cures dyspepsia, indigestion,
constipation, flatulency and insomnia. Ee
sure to try it.
Dried banana meal finds a ready sale in
Europe because of its great nutritive qualities.
Putxam Fadeless Dyes are fast to sunlight,
washing and rubbing. Sold by all druggists.
In a certain Western State there are
two families, one named Day and the
other Sunday. They are neighbors. Mr.
Day is the father of seven girls, while Mr.
Sunday has an equal number of boys.
Four of the sons have married Sundays,
another is engaged, so it now appears that
"every Day will be Sunday by and by."
.
_ Ladies Can Wear Shoes
One sire smaller after using Allen's FootEase,
a powder for the feet. It makes tight
or new shoes easy. Cures swollen, hot, sweating,
aching feet, ingrowing nails, corns and
bunions. At all druggists and shoe stores,
25c. Trial package Fit EE by mail. Address
Allen S. Olmsted, Le Eoy, N. Y.
The trouble with the budding genius is
- - ' -J j.1__ U..J
that he is trequentiy mppea m mc uuu.
Best For the Bowels.
No matter what ails von, headache to a
cancer, yon will never get well until your
bowels are pnt right. Cascakets help nature,
cure you without a gripe or paiu, produce
easy natural movements, cost you just 10
cents to start getting your health baok. Cascarets
Candy Cathartic, the genuine, put up
in metal boxes, every tablet has C.C.C.
stamped on it. Beware of imitations.
American wheat has been found to be
excellent for the manufacture of Italian
macaroni.
A LUXUF
Watch our next advei
Just try a package <
the reason of its pop
CONVINCING "HIS CHUM.
Johnny (in the garden)?Father! fa- |
titer! look out of the window.
Father (putting out his head)?What j
a nuisance you children are. What do
you want now?
Johnny (with a triumphant glance at
his playfellow) ? Tommy Brooks
wouldn't believe you'd got no hair on
the top of your head.?Tit-Bits.
A CAUSE OF CONTENTMENT. | J
"I trust, sir, that you have experienced ;
that marriage conduces to your comfort, j
happiness and peace of mind," said the '
stately and pompous old friend of the i
family.
"Very much so. indeed, sir," replied ,
the benedict. "I don't have to look for- j
ward to it."?AVic York Commercial |
WEATHER PERMITTING.
"I understand you had quite a sale for
your game of parlor-golf?" remarked the
inventor's friend.
"Yes; but it's played out now," replied
the inventor.
"Why, how's that?"
"It's played out, now."?Catholic
Standard and Times.
Caret Eczema, Itching' Humor*.
B. B. B. (Botanic Blood Balm') cures all skin
eruptions, itching humors, eczema, watery
blisters, scabs, scales, festering sores, boils,
carbuncles; heals every soro by giving a !
healthy blood supply to the skin. ?ld, |
deep-seated canes after all else :ans. ^ruggists,
$1. Describe symptoms and treatment
sent free and prepaid by writing Dr. Gillam,
12 Mitchell street. Atlanta, Ga.
Germany's share in the traffic of the
Suez Canal has increased greatly at the
expense of England.
FITS permanently cured. No fits or nervonsi
nees after first day's use of Dr. Kline's Great
Nerve Restorer. $2 trial bottle and tre^tiaa free
Dr.R.H.Kline, Ltd., PS1 Arch St., Phila. Pa
! An exposition of British products is
; planned lor next winter in St. Petersburg.
i Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup for children
j teething, so'teivthe gums, reduces inflammaj
tion,allays pain, cures wiud colio. 25c a botth
Western Siberia affords a good market
for American manufacturers of milk cans.
Pieo's Cure for Consumption is an infallible
medicine for coughs and colds.?N.W.Sasiuel,
i Ocean Grove, N. J., Feb. 17, 1900.
i
There are in the world twenty-four
presidents and only twenty kings.
W. H. Griffin, Jackson, Michigan, writes:
"Suffered with Catarrh for fifteen years.
Hall's Catarrh Cure cured me." Sold by
Druggists, 75c.
Married women are usually advocates
of home rule.
Are Your Eyes Sore?
If your eyes aro weak or sore Jno. R. Dickey's
Old Reliable Kyo-waier will cure tbem at
once. Don't burn or hurt. :&ets. Dickey Drug
Co., Bristol, Tenn.
There is a demand in Germany for
smoke consuming furnaces.
Sea advt. or smithdeaxs uusijjess lyomsun
A man may be as strong as a bull, and
still be cowed.
Hair Falls
I "I tried Ayer's Hair Vigor to
I stop my hair from falling. OneI
half a bottle cured me." i
| J. C. Baxter, Braidwood, 111. |
8 Ayer's Hair Vigor is j
8 certainly the most ecoI
nomical preparation of its
kind on the market. A j
little of it goes a long way. \
{ It doesn't take much of S
I it to stop falling of the i
hair, make the hair grow, g
and restore color to gray I
hair. $1.00 a bottle. All drngrfsts. 1
If your druggist cannot supply you, 1
send us one dollar and wo will express X
you a bottle. Be sure and give tho name jg
of your nearest express office. Addresfe.- 2
J. C. AYJER CO., Lowell, Mass; 8
w . a a
Liver Fins
That's what you need; someching
to cure your biliousness
and give you a good
digestion. Ayer's Pills are
liver pills. They cure constipation
and biliousness.
Gently laxative. All druggists. J
Want your moustache or beard a beautiful
brown or rich black ? Theu use
BUCKINGHAM'S DYE Whiskers I
80 cts. or Dsuoaisrs, on r. p. hall & Co.. nasmca, w. h.
UseCERTAINSCIIBE.il
"The Sauce that made West Point ram#n?.B |
MclLHENNY'S TABASCO. |
fY WITHIN THE REACH
11 Whit Hi
IIIUI VI
/ i\ The net is
/ jlyJj But what
*> l3l guesse
As at the
The haul
?. Excitemenl
i? What wil
B ) I 1 nct? w
pi I Jl I L Like our
^ Has prizes
"*v Conjecture
For childre
Septembe
Remember
To groce
That upon
LION C
If he's witl
A two-cei
You'll get
The LIC
rtisement.
Of LION COFFEE an
ularity.
J , I I
DO YOU SHOOT^7^
If you do yon ftOuH send your name and address on a postal card for a
WINCHESTER
GUN CATALOGUE. IT'S FREE.
It illustrates and describes all the different Winchester Rifles, Shotguns and
. Ammunition, and contains much valuable information. Send at once to the
Winchester Repeating Armo Co.. New Haven, Conn.
*
\ " " 1 m
ttw
rrevcm
Baldness
Croln nf r.inicfc
/"Villi Vl^ailOW lliv UVUip vr* VI
Scales, and Dandruff by
Shampoos with ?!
f&ticjjra
& D A f' |
- -.Li a rimciIPAi nurest of
Ana ngni UI wauigo TT*ui WW . ^ r
emollients and greatest of skin cures, litis if
treatment at once stops falling hair, removes
crusts, scales, and dandruff, soothes irritated,
itching surfaces, stimulates the hair follicles,
supplies the roots with energy and nourishment, ? ~s;
and makes the hair grow upon a sweet, wholesome,
healthy scalp when all else fails.
Millions of Women
USE CUTICURA SOAP, assisted by Cuticura Ointment, die
great skin cure, for preserving, purifying, and beautifying
the skin, for cleansing the scalp of crusts, scales and dandruff,
and the stopping of falling hair, for softening, whitening,
and soothing red, rough, and sore hands, for baby rashes, itching*,
and chafings, in the form of baths for annoying irritations and
inflammations, or too free or offensive perspiration, in the form of
washes for ulcerative weaknesses, ana many sanative, antiseptic
purposes which readily suggest themselves to women and mothers,
and for all the purposes of the toilet, bath, and nursery* No
amount of persuasion can induce those who have once used
these great skin purifiers andbeautifiers to use any others* CUTICURA
SOAP combines in ONE SOAP at ONE PRICE, the
BEST skin and complexion soap, the BEST toilet and baby soap
in the world. < ?
Complete External and Internal Treatment for Every Humour,
0*4 j Consisting of Cuticuxa Soap, to cleanse the skin of crusts and
nllflfllll'Q scales ana soften the thickened cuticle, CtrncunA Onrmsrz. to
111 alii III Km Instantly allay Itching, Inflammation, and irritation, and soothe
* and heal, and Cuticura JUsoltxnt, to cool and cleanse the
? ? blood. A Single 8rr is often sufficient to core the most tortnr.
? " ?? ? umi timuinn . -v:
THE SET log, disfiguring, and nominating mid, amp, uu wvw ?_
with loss ot hair, when all else faue SokI throngbont the world. British Depot: F? New. %$?
BERT A Sons, 87-28, Charterhouse Sq., London. Porcxa Dhuo jjid Crnoc. Cobp., Soli ^
Props.. Boston, U. 8. A.
TkC^CfpaDy,^?
World Renowned CHICAGO COTTAGE ORGANS.
Over 250,0C0 sold. Write as for catalogue and prices. We make easy payments to suit you.
America's Greatest Piano House, fW8 Whitehall St, Atlanta, fia.
WESLEYAN FEMALE COLLEGE, Macon, fia.
A Diploma From it is High Honor. Its Graduates are Everywhere.
One of the few high grade Institutions of the South. A quarter of a million dollars
invested in buildings. All modern conveniences. Ideal climate. Proverbially healthful. "
All Literary Courses of a high order, and Conservatory advantages in Music, Art and
' - 1? C.OAJ-. AA r,o, Pwll
Elocution. Literary Tuition and board, including launary, omj pvi
Term begins September 18, IDOL For catalogue and full information, address
J. W. ROBERTS, A. M., D. D., President. %
NO MORE SPOILED FRUIT.^? .
IV hy using my Standard Parent Self-Melting, Self- \f f S Jy? A
Sealing Wax Strlmrs. Very conrenlent and eoon- //rf/fyT //f/f
omlcal. Inquire of y<?ir dealer or send me his name | / * ' is is is m
and 45 cents In stamps for l0Ostrin? by mail.Mention |
this paper. C.C. rOl'Ts, MMdletown, Ohio. Is the oldest and only business college in Va. nra
Lng its building?a grind new one. No vacations.
Mention ihic Ponor In writing to advertisers Ladies & gentlemen. Bookkeeping,Shorthand,
WeDllOU inib raper ANU-Thirty-1901. Typewriting, Penmanship, Telegraphy. &c
' Leading business college south of the Potomac
hlfltaiw?^ rirer."?Phila. Stenographer. Address,
G. M. Smithdeal. President. Richmond. Va.
I h id/ f jA 2
OP ALL! - I 2 Jhj %
I (\-J$FP J
i Thg Nets Contain ?" I ---r-r-? ??_ ?|
? I $15 to $3O?T0 AGENTS #|
??. the n?i5 fined, I PER WEEK ( SELLING
sdo7',b , 5?M j CRAM'S POPULAR ATLAS
! ropes they strain. OF U. S. AND WORLD,
is yet uncounted, and* I New maps?New Census; New Statistics?
U I Most popular and valuable work. ever offered. . 7
' < (Julrkest seller Issued In 10 years. Exclusive
: reigns on every hand? territory. Low orlce. Liberal terms
11 the capture mean? I HUDGINS PUBLISHING CO., Atlanta. Ga.
ith contents yet concealed? I V ^ I | TT
new Premium List, Bj I I M V
that are unrevealed, 9 f P 1
I || uA ^poon
| xli baking powder
t first will bare. I jg THE BEST. TRY IT.
fl J.D. dk B.& CHRISTIAN CO. RICHMOND. YA.
r^peS.'0*0 I HEDICAL DEPARTMENT |
you ht should bestow | Tolaoe University of Lonisiana.
OFFEE's newest List. _ ~ ~ ~ _ ?
? ... Founded in 1834, and now ha* 3,841 Graduate*.
them, write to us. Iu for inrtractionf ^ mpto . % ^
it Stamp inclose; laboratory and abundant hospital materia Is a re nne>
:* w5thout further fus?? quailed. Free recess isRivpn to I he (treat Charity Hoalt
without turtner iu?? pital with 9U0 beds and w,000 patient* annualljr. Special
lN promptness shows. instruction is giyen dai y at the bedsida of tha sickThe
next session begins October 31st, 1901. For cata*
loaue and information address Prof. 8. E- CHAILLX.
M. D-. Dean. P. O. Drawer 2(1, New Orleans. Lil
__
?????? nDODQY NEW DISCOVERY; firm
UIV VI W I quick relief and cures worst rases.
Book of tettimonials and 10 daya> treatment
d you will understand
WOOLSON SPICE CO.. TOLEDO. OHIO.