The Camden chronicle. (Camden, S.C.) 1888-1981, March 20, 1914, Image 2
PATIENT Wtw I iu iHt bAOK
v
Cook Had Her Orders, and Dieobedl
anca. Evidently Waa Not a Fall
ing In Har Makaup.
Several of our departed handmaid
en# Ktand out in our memory, aur
rounded by a veritable halo of umllea
and laughter In *plte of their faulta
and ahortcomlnga
Ohm fa i Huediuli cook who Hubst!'
tilted for llto parlor maid on tlia I a t
tar'a . day "out" received explicit In
atructlona to admit no pattonta com
ing to Heo the doctor through tho
private entrance; they should ho
nttkod t ?> go to the doctor's en
trance. iniiUiad of heiiiR led through
the family'* private room a at? had fre
quently occurred Iri tho pant.
Mathilda HoJcmnly notVlod liar com*
preti< n^ion and j>roee?dod to carry
out Instructions in the following mas
terly fashion:
A gentleman hurried up to tlx? fam
ily's dour, and Mathilda ponderously
advanced to unawer IiIh ring.
Gentleman la tho doctor in?
Mathilda ? IUeaan go 'round to od
der door.
Gentleman N'evcr mind that; la
the doctor in?
Matlldy (firmly) ? Hleaso go 'round
to odd"r door.
Gentleman (very inad, loudly and
dltftlnctly) In tlio-doetor-a t-home?
Mathilda (eadly )-? IJleaHo go 'round
to odder door,
Tho gentleman, anorting hit* dlaguat,
stamped down tho steps, went around
to the physician's entrance and rang
hopefully,
Mathilda looking at him aa if aho
had never aeon him before, aoon
opened tho door crack
Gentleman ? Well? I* the doctor
in?
Matliilda ? No, lie Ihh ond!? Kx
change. 1 '
THERE WITH AN EXPLANATION
One Suspects That Bald-Headed Bar
bor Had Been in That Tight
Situation Before.
A weHtern Henutor complirhented an
actor on his flno head of hair and
H.'iid ho would like' to ki ow the ac
tor'4" fo^rot..
Smoothing Ills kIohh.v, lockn, tho ac
tor replied:
"The secret of n good ii^ad of heat
In unknown. Tho number of bald
headed barbers one seen 1b proof o
thin, because a bald head In a Koriou
<b jiwback to a barber's trade, llov
in'fin v bald barbers, offering hnl
prnv <tv to customers are asked wir
thev don't use tho tonic f heiiisol ves."
I.ain.'hing, til:; actor 'continued;
"I k? ow a bald barber in Nov
York, though, who lias a ready, if no
altov.oi nor convincing', answer fo
<1 h i i of that sort.
"A fj lend of mine, on being o'vfrc
a bottle of initio one- day at Th1- fe"
low'-* '''.op, exclaimed:
" 'What, a nerve you ' ' So bal
ye'ir.'lf. yet recoiiim' ! ?: a hai
tonic '
" ' M ." the burlier replied, i' is o*
i"v :'4i a M whose fine head of ha'
you si' ? (hat we use, the hair tonic. 1
or I'v oilier hand, am experini' n'lc
yith a new dcpM:: 'orv creauj. .hi1"
look id mi \ sl;nl! ? umifih as .a hi.
1 laid iuiii" '
Had to Be Fashionable.
lo'tie was black, and "kinder pet
t'< d" as fo age. Talking was her fort*
r 'id no hints sufficed to silence liei
T";< ciently. however, slie niado r?
nurks worth hearing? so tho faniJI
b'>r" her loner stories patiently, on tie
wlipie and usually were rewarded.
I o" " had one brilliant too'h, whicl
I*'-'* t'-i i d when she smiled, and whet
r1' ? ,'ived h? r lirst month's wage1
?-r*rr* . rk< d : "Nmv I.??? pwliu: 'or b
i:i:T s .?. !! ' I'll KU dat denji:
?? ? to kiver lip tooUi will.
i-oM'"
\\ a- n In r n"s'n'.^ ub>erv?-d tha'
h< i* i- ? h s"e:::i-d tiaa-uaHy f ouv.d '
1 ???'thy leni ?? ? ! *>*: i ? ? m ir.r.ed : I
s.
l>!? ense (P y c; . bti' ><>' ?, o f a '
yt ' ! V:i s ? ? ? ? x ? ? * ? !'! to fa.-h !? ? r : a !
nn., V
Why He Was Fnvortd.
it ? A .?<'?!)? ' ?) <; ii'lii Js
>\i"i ;i.;y ? Me h*1 mou'.cJ m>t
1. : ?' * * ? ? : u. L v.V.; i> -?? . r
l*i i ??? ?:. . ,] . . . ? ? i r ' ie
v. i i? "i i ; 1 .t \ : r;
or u *i;?- n i w
\ > 'vk c: m ? \r . : i . \
v !>.? ;? 'I In t o:' ?? ? ? '! ' n U? <1
I - ! ; ? ? * | ! :? 1 '!.> !?
? ? ?! v . ? ? >i v, tvt i ?'.>?
? I 1 i>v. ' i 11 I: ;t V 1" ? !1 J-ro 1
j- ? ? vh-. o:. !.-?
r
' i v "? " " hi1) of \ i ' . r **? !i
{.ru'Ji . : ' A .:r.'r !.t y w ? : ? t
l..i ? . ; .. ? . t.iui'h i : ? :f
!;<.? ',) it ' "
' u ?t rev i
i k Va ,k' ! ? :
lit ? ! ?
t! r pr- r ..
wotiry ?>?' sv? ;?
11:. i
VV.ui- .?>*' .i'"
Ot .?
ti.
<\ T
<l!v
V ' '
p.-:,
: i * i ?
i* ? ? * Of
They Wouldn't Drown.
Home time ago un Irishman present
ed himself before a Liverpool magis
trate to ?e?*k advice.
"Horr," he Haiti, "1 kapes liens In
mo cellar, hut th' waither pipes is
hurst, an' me hens is all drowned."
"Horry I can't do anything for you,"
said the magistrate; "you had better
apply to the water company."
A few days later ? Pat again ap
peared.
"Well, what now? What did the
wutor company tell you?" queried the
magistrate.
"They tould me, yer honor." was
the reply, "to kape ducks."
Hot Day Discipline.
"Well, you can have the job. Hut
mind you, I want a man that's live, a
hustler ? one who works Just for the
pleasure of working."
"I see. I'm the man. You'll never
catch me watching the clock, sir."..
"Ah, I'm glad- you reminded me.
And I don't want to catch you hop
ping up every half hour or so to take
a look at the thermometer."
Artistic Instinct.
' "Why did 'hat pretty little artist
break her engagement?"
"Because she did not liko the color
combination of the' match."
"What do you mean by that?"
"She did not see how ?he could
make her rosy future harmonize witl.
ills purple past."
Useful at the Races.
"Why did you pick Alpha to wh
that race? 1 never thought he wouh
win."
"Alpha is the first l??tt?>r of the (iron1
?'.Iphabet. 1 figured that Alpha slioul.
naturally lead."
"See what it is to have an educa
t ion ! "
a rrirxsecuTZD man.
"Curse this fatal gift of beamy of
mine! Here I got to take to do woodsj
La git away from do goil.s!"
I diosy ncracy.
' Ti s sfnntjf !;?> a .til ih?> family
Will ll^ht In uiiitr (.(?? Ilti*
And y t t ? > t'-'i'l ;!.<? furnace
No one ha.H ro.
Protest.
"Hello. old ft Tionv!" baiJ Lai.liim to
f'u-serton. "1 just dropped in to kill a
little IMJIO."
"Fcr the love of Mike!" exclaimed
iiusnrton, as he pauM'd in the midet
(? t hts labors, "kill il out in ih<' hall. !
L).".(.:cL to my <?(!:???? being used for that
unit of abattoir."
When Short of Funds.
"A man mav he a good lis;?nt r and
" ill net be a listener who is good "
' Quite true. And while >ou are quib
bling. permit me to ol*-vrve ih.it a
man ma;. bo a ready t". ; ? t nder and s':il
iu >i bo a hpi'i !er who i.-. r? ad>
burn Thing.
I'aei ! Vou ui iv talking to
t :.rr in h : c ?'! 1 . u -lent yon?
1'i.l-f!-! ? X r-. ; In > a 't'-M.'t ::>i'.e:';
fuivl 1: ?? v. a.-- 1 1 1 ; ; to,- 1 1 ? ec.iti.
Th\;t 3 \v h < i;. f< ?*. writ" it""
E .v y T .1 a x .
"Maude i ? i ? ?! ?! ?! .. let nf
:?? i ! :t; i rr rs ii.ti) l>e".? \ .1, . . h*. t . i r ? i foi
I lo?? ii Mi M: ? >:;? :t ?"
!l. that's ' nsv h . .??!?> g-il
v ? : iv. ., i.c : t : w a> .
; it L . : ;ia.
:xJ.OW ;. ;j i,;H
? ra : ? \ "
tha'. ! ;nv wo I
. .i . > 4 i i i," !. ?; in i i>
feu be botk Judge and Jury
Lot the Trial last Thirty Days ?
Buy a pair of "Headlight" overalls at
our gtorc today.
If tSr^rSy days of the hardest wear does L. _
not convince you that these are the best overalls you "*
ever bought, bring them back and get your money.
There will i>e no argument. You are the Supreme Court in this
case. Your decision will be -favorable? or we will stand the costs.
CAMDEN, SOUTH CAROLINA
Don't Throw ft Away
Bring Your Broken
! arts to
W. 0. HAY'S GARAGE
at Singleton s Old Bakery
stand and have them weld
ed ? made stronger than
new by the Oxy-Acety
lene Welding Process.
This process saves the cost of
automobile parts, to say nothing
of the annoyance of delays 4in or
dering new.
NOTHING HARMFUL IN
. BABY COUGli SYRUP
You must bo particular-- -cxact
. lug. whoa choosing n remedy for
Baby's' cough.
"1 hero ate so many remedies
containing habit - forming drugs
? that baby's health will ho great
ly impaired unless >cu know ah
. s.duicly just what the remedy
col, rail s ami the action of each
ingred ent , so you can be sure it
\ is harmless.
NYAL'S
| P.AItY < Oldll SYIlI'l*
j .s s"l?l by us on a posili.e guar
? ; 1 1 ' y wo know the contents and
?hi> action and know that it will
j do as ri'prespnf ed. Ii breaks up
> <? >ugh in short order. pro;?cts
t lu> ii.t'ii lii'iiiK f o.f t ho throat a
^:t:ns: irritation nnd infection,
i ils h'.? throat of all injurious
di-posi's, and prevents furthor ao
i u 'it 'i 1 1 1 iot:s.
( 'i iMt .i i us iu> habit - forming
? Itngv, and can h?? gi\cn
v\i<h perfect sale. > ? bab>
wi.:i like it , t ? >?>.
j T\\ rut \ - ivo (oats the l?otth\
\\'!i ;; good drut;
j ? miv li ? :o haw and mail) things
? ' h ; ? o'h. . ?!ru ; stores don't keep
j \<i': 1 ftiid !t? re. Come to ih
: ; i ti-1 vnr, 1! >;<?* w !..u jcaj
CAMDEN DRUG COMPANY j
T?? i!i?- I'iiIiIk.
! iv ? ) -? t ; 1 :>:u
? ? 'a : ? r t !'? c r'ii :w!;i : il ():! Co..
( i. y- Mipp'.y your nociis in
o s, k s. '.n<\ o'c., as I r.ow r pro
- -v. r * 4 ?* CI 1 1 r 1! ? f ;n >:i? Co.
J. H. Zonip.
TAX NOTICE.
Office of Treasurer Kershaw Co., j
Camden, S. C., Sept. .;u, 1'JIJ.' i
Notice is hereby given that the |
booUb will be open tor culleoling of,
S a.e, County ami School '1 axes iron
October loth, lylis, to March 1st, I
I y 1 4 . A penalty of 1 per ceut will}
oe added to all taxes unpaid Jao- j
uary Is., iyi4, 2 per ctiil Kebru- j
?try 1st, 11)14, and 7 per cent March
1 st, 1014.
The rale per centum for Kershaw
county is as follows:
Mills.
S ate taxes /4 I
County Taxes 4 >4
Special taxes 2 %
ltv^ad taxes 2 Vii
School taxes 3
Special school taxes 1
Total 1 8 %
The following school districts have
special levies:
Special school tax, Dist.
Special. school tax, Dist.
SpeeiaJ,. Bchool tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax. Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school lax, Dist.
Special school tax. Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Special school tax, Dist.
Spoclal school tax, Dist.
Special school tax. Dist.
The poll tax is $1.
All able bodied male persons from
the ago of twenty-one (21) to six
ty <60) years, both inclusive, except
r 8idents of the incorporated towns
of the county, shall pay two dollar.;
($2) as a road tax, except ministers
oi the gospel actually In charge of
?i congregation, teachers employed
in pubt.c schools, school trustees
and persons permanently disabled in
the military servjee of this state
and persons who served in the
la e war between the States, and
all per. ons actually employed in
the quniantine service of this state,
a<>d all students who may be at
tending school or college at the
time when the said road tax shall
become due. Persons claiming dis
abilities must present certificates
from two reputable physicians of
th s county.
NO. 1, 4 %
No. 2, 1 V*
No. 4, 3
No. 6, 4
No. 7, 2
No. 8, 2 r
No, y, 2
No. 10, 5
No. 11, 5
No. 12, 4
No. 13, 4
No. 15, 3
No. 17, 3
No. 18, 3
No. iy, 4
No. 21, 2
No. 2 2, 4
No. 24, 3
No. 2o, 3
No. 2 7, 6
No. 28, 2
No. 2y, 4
No. 30, 2
No. 4 0, 11.
No. 4G, 8
No. 4 7, 4
bo
Paint.
Paint is \:so.| on houses, park f-ftoos,
fentoa and far. ?. It cumoit in ooiors.
Red pair,* is used on towns by yownp
co'.lrjj 1 iv.' ri .iinl old deaeons. Freidi
paint ir- ?:v 1 ry rli'Mn n v\l;on t he>
have th< v.- el'ih.s on. Paint ii
also used <<n hi?:n hoards which arc
put up cvor\ wIkto to Improve th^
scenery No American ROftiery L
complete without them. ? Life.
FOR.
ROOTS
A K ?'
S ! OZ
W>> L.L3
SUP?R(On[
T0 I
WOOD I
'"THE best looking and best
wearing roof on tue market.
Cannot warp, crack or blow oil*.
Laid in single pieces like wood
shingles.
Has thick butt end and blind
nailing. Nothing else like it in
the world. Will last a lifetime.
"jWTADE in two handsome colore,
red or slate. Requires no
painting. Improves the appear
ance of the building.
Especially adapted for Resi
dences, Bungalows, Club Build
ings and wherever color effects
are desired.
DAVIDSON LIMBER COMPANY, Agents
M>l)(ii: IMItECTOKY
Hisln^ Slur Chapter No. 4, It. A.
M.t meets third Tuesday in each |
month. It. "i. Goodale, E. H. P.; j
C. li. Griffin, lv.; 1-.. T. Mills,
Scr be, C. I*. i.uLk,se, Secretary.
Kershaw Lodge No. A. F. Al., i
meets first Tuesday In each
moil h. N. It. Goodale, W. M.; j
W. GeUenhe u or, '1 reas. ; N. C.
Arne.t, Secretary.
?Jr. O. U. A. M., meets fourth Fri
day niKhi in each month. ('. W.
Birchmore, C.; J. P. Bat;-i:v:n.
It. S.
Live Oak Camp No. 41), W. ?o. \V..
meets first Thursday nigl.t iu j
each month. C. \V. Birchmore.
C. C.f W. E: Jonnson. '.'lerU.
DeKalb Lod?t? 4 1, K . of 1 . j '
nie<; t p sec nod- and fourth Mon
day nights in ??ach month. \V '
O. Wilswt). ('. t'.; M II. Hcjman,
K. of It. ^ S
Poplar Camp No. 3C.9, W. O. W..
meets Monday ntght on or hefor?
the full moon in each month. T.
J. Munr.erlyn, C. C.; B. E. Spar
row, Clerk.
Antioeh Lc.d?e. No. A. F. M.. ?
meets Thursday night on or be
fore full moon In each month. D.
\V. Joy. W M.; W. II. Davis. S.
W ; L. II Whit o. .1 W
Ulchard Klrkland Council, No. ISO,
Jr. O. U A M.. (Antlorhi meets
First Thursday nlirht nftor full
moon in each month. B. C. Cook
C. W. Shiver, It. S.
Lafayette Council No 2. ft. & S. M.,
meets second Tuesday In each
month. C. II. OrHfln. T. I M.;
]\ T Goodale. It 1 n M: J C
Rownn. 1 1\ C. \\\: A. W. Bur
nett, Becorder.
Needn't Watch Bargain.
^ hen a native o* r'p*;^c!
?!:>nkv! <? i ? i
a J
? .jua .
COLUMBIA-LUMBER fr
MANUFACTURING CO.
MILL WORK
SASH, DOORS, BLINDS
AND LUMBER
PLAIN & HUGER STS. Phone 71
COLUMBIA, S. C.
Dr. I. H. Alexander Dr. R. E. SI?hmm
Alexander & Stevfcnson
DENTISTS
Office Southeast Corner Broad and DeKalb St*.
Dr. E. H. KERRISON
DKNTI8T
SucoeflBor to Dr. L. W. Alston
OffJco In the
Mmm Itiiiidhig plume"1
.MONEY TO M)AN
on RKAL ESTATE ? EASY
TEKMS
K. O. \onTrwckow.
MOXIOY TO I X>A V. ^ _
On Improved farms. Ea<\y term*
*Pl>ly to h. H. Clarke. Cajnden, ?