Cheraw chronicle. (Cheraw, S.C.) 1896-2005, May 15, 1913, Page Page Seven, Image 7
APRIL FOOL JOKE, ALL RIGHT
Grocer, His Wife, and Unknown
M8ucker" All Mixed Up in Peculiar
Little Comedy.
"Oh, no, there won't be any divorce,"
aid the grocer. "Wife and I won't I
speak to each other for the next three
months, and then we'll begin to get '
friendly again. You see, I had changed
small bills for a fifty, and when I '
went home that night wife wanted a
new dress. I told her I couldn't afford
it, as I had had a bad fifty passed on
me, and when she doubted I showed
" 11 - t,n wnrH ft\T
ner ine om. sue iuuk m/ > >?.? --- .
it and said she'd wait."
"That was good for her," said the
listener.
"So it was, but you wait a minute. 1
I shoved the bill into my vest pocket
and thought no more of it 'till next *
morning?April Fool morning. The 1
bill was gone and I humped for the 1
house like a cyclone. Had she seen 1
It? She had. She had found it on 1
the bedroom floor. Thank heaven." 1
'That was lucky." .
"And then she told me that being
It was a counterfeit, and being as it 1
was April Fool's day, she had taken
it out to the sidewalk and then
watched a man picking it up. She j
was laughing at his feelings when he
hound himself stung."
"And you told her she had flung '
away fifty gold dollars?"
"Yes, and that her mother must
go, and the hired girl must go, and
we'd have to make a pound a butter
tio us for a ^eek, and a hundred other
things. I jumped up and down. I
awore. I smashed things."
"And then?"
"Oh, she just called me a fool and
let it go at that, and I guess she's
right"?Exchange.
Chester Education Board Meets.
The Chester county board of education
at its meeting granted the petition
of the citizens of Blackstock for I
a separate school district. Blackstock
will be the centre of this die
It win rnvor a rarrltnrv nf fnnr !
and one-half square miles in Chester
county and a similar area in Fairfield
county. The hoard will meet next
week ta redlstrict the territory re
maining in the present Biackstoch
fl]rtrirfi Vfflfr T T r" ma a-^elnt?
- ed by the board a trustee of Pleasant
Grove prhool district. No. 20.
Hookworm Campaign in Union.
Union. ? Dr. Wickllffe Rose, In
oharge of the Rockefeller fund for
scientific medical investigation, and
Dr. LaBruce Ward of the state board
of health, were here in the interest
cf the campaign being waged against
the hookworm in this county. In company
with Dr. L. A. Riser, in charge
of the work here, they visited the
Cross Keys section of the county and
left for Easlev. The work in this
county has progressed. The examinations
show Infection in about 25 per
cent of those examined.
A>y' lij I
?1J_L_LL F=
JUULOhI
IJ L ?
jHfJL
LARGE REWARD FOR HONESTY
Entire Fortune of Eccentric Man Left
to Young Girl Who Withstood
Temptation.
A wealthy man died in Brussels,
leaving nearly the whole of his fortune
to a young woman who was entirely
unacquainted with him.
He was a very eccentric man, and
set out, like Diogenes, in search of an
honest man. His "tub" was an omnibus,
and his lantern a small coin.
In the omnibus he took his seat near
the conductor, and always showed
himself very obliging, passing up the
money of passengers and returning
the change, but to the latter he always
managed to add a franc, or a
half-franc. Then he would watch
those to whom it came. They would
count it carefully; notice the extra
coin, and invariably slip it into their
pockets. No one thought of the poor
conductor, whose meager salary of
three francs a day could ill spare
Buch a loss.
But at last a young woman passed
hers back with: "Conductor, you have
given me half a franc too much."
"Diogenes," delighted, followed her
home, made inquiries, and as the answers
were satisfactory, made his
will In her favor, though he never gave
her warning that her half-franc waa
going to bring her a million.
SEEMS A POOR OCCUPATION
Demand for Female "Kennel-Malde"
Said to Be the Latest In the
Old Country.
Ladies have been advised to take
up the profession of "kennel-maid,"
but the latest development of this occupation
appears to be that of "canine
nurse." Reports from the old
country tell that* there are actually
institutions for training ladles to become
nurses for dogs. They are
taught to study the different ailments
of the canine pets, and have to serve
an apprenticeship for at least twelve
months before they are qualified. A
good nurse can command a good salary.
Only recently a lady i:'v Dublin
engaged one of these canine nurses at
$16 a week, besides paying traveling
expenses. At most dog shows in Engtumes
attending the valuaible animals
that are on exhibition. An advertise-"
ment appeared in a London journal
only a few weeks ago offering $300
npp vpnr and all found for a qualified
kennel maid.
Parole Granted By Governor.
Columbia. ? Louis Bunion, alia?
George Brunson, who was convicted ir
the Richland county court in 1905 on
the charge of carbreaking and larceny
on two counts and sentenced to eight
and seven years' imprisonment, re
spectively, in the state penitentiary
was paroled by the governor. Sine
assuming office the governor has extended
clemency in 609 cases.
.iiM-t-m
TTTI III FR-ffl
How Are You
? This !
If you w;
service use
d0A New*
fink 0llc
0jm Always re
||||g No coal, s
!&s93| Food cooke
jEgrePa body happi
|g|ggj Made with
|P& STANDARD
Norfolk, V*. gj^]
~ Kicknoai, Y*.
HAD NO DELUSIONS AT ALL
Sweet Angelina Did Not Give the
Sweet Response Henry So Ar>
dently Expected.
Love's young dream is indeed a
beautiful thing. Sweet Angelina and
Henry thought it hardly possible such
bliss could be theirs as they sat on
the river bank in the cool of an August
evening.
They met only at week-ends, for
he was a toiler In the city, and he
found it cheaper to lodge near his
work.
And now the blessed week-end
spent at home was here, and he could
see nothing but uninterrupted happiness
till Monday morning. He slipped
* * * %_?? ? xoi'n tirftlaf
18 arm rouna dih sweeiueai<. d no?h i
"Dearest!" he) said.
Her gaze was fixed on the water.
"Darling!" he murmured again,
drawing her towards him. "Can you
guess why 1 come home every Saturday?"
"Yes," was the scarcely whispered
answer.
"What Is.lt, dearest?" he asked,
anxiously waiting for the sweet reply
that he felt sure must he hovering
on those pretty lips.
"It's?It's for your clean clothes,
isn't it?" she queried softly.
To Town Under False Pretenses,
"I was born In the dark of the moon
and foredoomed to ride two loads in
the rear of the antepenultimate!"
mordaciously explained Pip Maudlin,
the popular clubman of Skeedee, as
he stood humped up and hopeless at
Tenth street and Grand avenue. "I
| read in the 'Speaking the Public Mind*
I department in The Star where a helpful
gent announced that the wind was
giving a grand free exhibition at this
corner by floating the hats of the men
as high as the tops of the buildings
and starting the Mnger-ee of the ladies
In the same direction. Having business
in Kay See this week, anyhow, I
set my date two days ahead and came
right along. And now, by jimplecute, !
as soon as I get here the wind dies '
down flat, till if I had the onlx match ,
within a hundred miles I could light
my cigar with perfect safety. And
it -?i ,1.., ?_ T 1
1 llllll mat iu iuj uaouc iu 50W u?io m. I
forgot to bring the list of things I I
wanted to buy. Ar-r-r-r-r!"?Kansas
TAp.Star? ~
English State Horses.
A curious interest attaches to the j
creau>culored horses which draw the ;
state coach of the sovereign on ceremonial
occasions. These "ponies," as
tbey are called, represent the white 1
horse which was the standard of the
ancient Saxons, and 1b still preserved
in the royal shield of the House of
Hanover, by which it was reintroduced
into England. The famous white i
horse carved on the slope of Ufflngton 1
hill in Berkshire is a proof that it was 1
known to our Saxon ancestors, who
thus recorded their great victory over
the Danes. Who has not heard of "The
Scouring of the White Horse?"?London
Chronicle.
[|
Going To Cook
Summer? J7
ant cool, quick
a
IbBSdioR
UMifciinrrat-gn
ook-stev? KL
:ady for use. Is V
moke or ashes,
;d better, every- |ajj|jip
OIL COMPANY V
ew Jcrtejr) Charlotte, N. C. ^
LT1M0RE
Chariest oa, S. &
Considering
A great deal of our new busir
or indirect, influence of our <
evidence that our treatment
factory.
Now, if you are conside
know any of our depositors,
talk with them, and learn fn
expect from us.
Your account, whether la
careful attention.
Merchants & 1
CHERAl
W. P. STEVENSON
President
T. G. MATHESON D. S. M.A
Cashier Vice
At an Owner Should Be.
Whilst it 16 each man's Interest that
not only ease and convenience of living,
but also wealth or surplus products
should exist somewhere, it need
not be in his hands. Often it is very
undesirable to him. Goethe said well:
"Nobody should be rich bu? those who
understand It." Some men are born
to own. and can animate all their
possessions. Others cannot; their
owning is not graceful?seems to be
a compromise of their character;
they seem to steal their own dividends..
They should own who can administer,
not they who hoard and conceal;
not they who, the great proprietors
they are, are only the greater
beggars, but they whose work
carves out work for more, opens a
path for all. For he is the rich man
In whom the people are rich; and he
Is the poor man in whom the people
are poor.?Emerson.
Legal Opinion.
"A cat .sits on my back fence every, __
night and he yowls and yowls and "
yowls. Now, I don't want to have
any trouble with neighbor Jones, but
this thing has gone far enough, and
I want you to tell me what to do."
The young lawyer looked as solemn
as an old sick owl, ^nd said not a
word.
"I have a right to shoot the cat,
haven't I?"
"I would hardly say that,'' replied
young Coke Blackstone. "The cat
does not belong to you, as I understand
it."
"No, but the feDr:e does."
"Then," concluded the light of law.
"I think It safe to say you have a perfect
right to tear down the fence."?
New York Preaa.
I
\
I
1 I. Ik's
- ry " "*
i
A Change?
leas comes to us as the direct
;ustoraers, which is sufficient
of them is perfectly satisring
a banking change, and
make it a point to have a
om them just what you may
rge or small, will receive our
Farmers Bank
N, S. C.
H. M. DUVALL
Vlce-Pre?
LTHESON J. H. WANNAMAKER
Pres Hss't. uasDier
ft headache, biliousness, in- ft
I digestion, rheumatism, M
m pimples, blotches, yellow ft
complexion, etc., are all ft
ft signs of poisons in your '
I blood. These poisons M
m should be driven out, or ft
ft serious illness may result ft:
M To get rid of them, use I
I Thedford's" I
[Black-Dniiighti
I the old, reliable, purely ft
I vegetable, liver med-'cine. ft; ;
I Mrs. J. H. Easier, of ft
m Spartanburg, S. C., says:
ft years. I felt bad most of Ml
the time, I tried Thed- Mi
M ford's Black-Draught and ft>
I now I feel better than ft
H Vaii. Hninrm'cf c?ll? If In
I VUI UlUg^lOt UV?W u> _
25 cent packages M
I Insist on Thedford's I
STETENSON & PRINCE
Attorneys at Law
Merchants & Farmers Bank Building
CHE RAW, S. C?
Fresh Beef and Pork
and Pork Sausage
at
H. A. Burch's Market
PHONE 80
. Covington Hotel Building
Second Street
Cheraw, S. C.
A O. CHAPMAN
Phone 2b. Cheraw, 8. C.
First class Jlvery. Reasonable
prices. For quick trips I use first
I)It. J. E. FUKDEBBl'BK,
i>ental Surgeon,
Phones: Ofiice 138; Residence 174
Office over Merchants & Farmers Bank
DB. L. BUIST. KEBBISOX
DENTIST
Opposite the Evans Co.
rurniw fi r.
Phones: Office 222. Residence 72.
Signs Missing.
"Why do ycu want your money
back?" asked the man at the box office.
"You're operating under false
pretenses here. This isn't a real
vaudeville show. I noticed that three
of the performers sang songs in which
there was no mention of love in connection
with the stars above."