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GOATS NEARLY RUINED HIM Farmer Complains of Bureau Litera ture to Roosevelt. Philadelphia Rec'rd. Washington. D. C.. June 20.-Presi dent Roosevelt at the Cabinent meet ing to-day entertained the member by reading a humorous letter he ha< reeeived from a New Hampshir, farmer, who had been experimentini with Angora goats. This is the letter Mr. President: I regret -to call you: attention to the Angora goat depart ment of the bureau of agriculture It has spread broadcast a documen commending Angoras to the farmer of the country. This contains thre specious landscapes. "Before Goating" shon s a dens jungle, suggesting the average Nev Hampshire pasture. "One Year Afte Goating" shows the same land pro ducinga valuable crop of bean poles "Two Years After Goating" shows : lawn suitable for golf links Th, onifniverous appetite of Angoras i described in a way that led me to hop, they might even effect a saving ii blasting powder, the chief source o expense in farming hereabouts. I procured a flock at considerabl cost. The result of the first inter view of my dog and the buck cause me to name the latter Togo. Hi views on the subject, I think, woul receive your approval. The does. of tihe other hand. neglect their kids s shamelessly that I fear they belon to a female goat club. I inclosed the flock with a fenc highly recommended to me by -th American Steel and Wire compan} I now suspect that this coinpa.,y ma; be a Trust, and should be investi gated. The goats began by thrustin their heads through the upper par of the fence, where they hung b their horns. When tired of this the went through, under and over th tence. T make no comvlaint that they at a valuable rose garden belonging to neighbor; but their conduct in m own vegatable garden entitled me t relief. When pursued their rapidit of movement might suggest ideas t the Pennsylvania Railroad compan in connection with its Chicago-Nei York service. If interested, you ca <obtain the flock on easy terms, nc necessitating a new bond issue. I leave the matter, Mr. Presiden to you, sure of justice. A consulat near good fishing ground -would b appreciated. * An Absent-Minded Man. A group of sailors on coastwise vea sels were gathered on an East Rivc pier recently and got to spinnin yarns as sailors usually do when the .are together long. "The absent-mindedesf man I evt hearn tell of used to live downi Maine," said one old tar. "He was so blamed absent-mninde -tihat he used to fergit his name. T11 pepul of the town was on to him a right and had lots of fun with him. "One day he went to the postoffic and asked if there was enny mail f< his'n folks. 'What's your name?' as] *S+@+e+O+e+e eI eI enae e Kithen * 0 sest+ ed the postmaster. Old Hall-his name was Hall---was stuck. Ile - scratched his ;head. but it was no use ndI started to go h-,ime. Just out si(ie the (iuor he met an old friend, who said: 'Good a'ternoon. Mr. Hall. - The old man rushed pellmeli into the - postoftice, singing out at the top of his voice, Hall! Hall! That's my I name! Got any mail fer the Halls?' "Old Hall and his wife were just starting out to take a drive one day, and they forgot tVhe hitching rope. Old Hall said he fetch it, so he went - to the barn. He had been gone a . deuce of a while, so his wife thought, t when he came around the corner of the house toting an old sawhorse. His wife got the rope. 'That old fellow did a kinds of queer things. He'd just as likely grab his wife's frying pan when he was go ing to milk the cow as the milk pail. - His wife hit the nail on the head when she said: 'I can never tell, when I send Jim for a needle that he won't a show up with a pickax.' - A Dear Little 'Boy. 1 Archbishop Ryan, at a dinner that f was given in his honor in Philadel phia, anent, a man who had bought a salted mine: - "The gentleman's disappointment I on the discovery of the salt must have s been great. It resembles a little, per I haps. the emotion of a certain Frank 1 fort man. " "This man had a small nephew of whom he was very fond. One night in evening dress, he called at the e youngster's house. and, taking hirr e on his knee, gave a demonstration oi an opera hat's mechanism. First he ' would crush his ta.l black hat intc - a pancake. Then, with a loud report he would spring it back into its porp t er shape again. Y "The little fellow was amused. H< Y took the that. He too, found h< e could crush it and open it again witl ease. He played with it for half ar e hour. He had a good time. The epi a sode made an impression on him. y "The uncle. called the next montl 0 on a Sunday afternoon. Tbis tim< y he wore a frock coat and a silk hat 0 He placed tihe silk hat on a table it y the hall, entered the parlor and be v gan to converse with his brother. n "An hour passed. Then the little t nephew entered with something blacl and shapeless in his hand. t, " 'Uncle,' 'he said, 'this hat is hard e er than your other one. I've had t< e sit on it, but I can't get it more'n hal shut." - Colors Birds Don't Like. Chicago Journal. r Red wvill annoy a turkey-cock a g much as a bull, but a sparrow will no y let it disturb its nmind. But if on, shakes a blue rag in front of a cage< :r sparrow's eyes he will go franti n with disgust. Sparrows and linnets too, will refuse food offered them o d a piece of blue paper and dislike th .e appearance of any one wearing 11 blue cress. Medium lig'ht blue affect them rmost, but blue serge the :e scarcely mind at all. Thrushes an ~r black birds object to yellow, but wi t- .use red or blue dried grass left abou Ice Creani While You When in ne and a lot of t] largest stock Tinware, Ene tensils in the their haunts to build the outer layers Sp "f their nests. Yellow gras=es they 1':l: 11' t US~C. 1o Found a Cure for Dyspepsia. Mrs. S. Lindsay. of Fort William, ap: Ontario. Canada. who has suffered lan, quite a number of years from dyspep- on sia and great pains in the stomach, Sn was advised by her druggist to take G. Chamberlain's Stomach and Liver Tablets. She did so and says, "I find that they have done me a great deal m< of good. I have never had any suf- thi fering since I began using them." It alh troubled with dyspepsia or indiges tion why not take these Tablets, get well and stay well? -For sale by Smith Drug Co., Pelham and Son, D W. G. Mayes, and Prosperity Drug c. Co. h The laxative *effect of Ch!mberlain's i Stomach and Liver Tablets is so ag agreeable ;d so natural that you do co not realize it is the effect of a medicine. For sale by Smith Drug mn Co., Pelham and Son, W. G. Mayes. to( and Prosperity Drug Co. C A pretty girl doesn't mind reflec- sa tions on herself when they come from gr a mirror. A young man may induce the girl's a father to toe the mark by posing as the mark. Mr. J. T. Barber of Irwinville, Ga., is always keeps a bottle of Chamber lain's Colic, Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy at hand ready for instant use. Attacks of coli cholera morbus H and diarrhoea come on so suddenly bii that there is no time to hunt a 'doctor an or go to .the store for medicine. Mr. an Barber says: "I have tried Cham- El berlain's Colic, Cholera and Diar rc rhoea Remedy which is one of the te best medicines I ever saw. I keep a in bottle of it in my room as I have had wi several attacks of colic and it has su proved to be the best medicine I ever gt used." Sold by Smith Drug Co., VI Pelham and Son, W. G. Mayes, and 50 Prosperity Drug Co. If you have written a letter, read it wN carefully before sending. If the words "Burn this" appear take your own advice at once. dt Cuban Diarrhoea. ca U. S. soldiers who served in Cuba C, during the Spanish war know what B: this disease is, and that rrdinary tr 'remedies have little more effect than is Sjso much water. Cuban diarrlhoea is et. almost as severe and dangerous as a w mild attack of cholera. There is' one *remedy, however, that can always be depended upon as will be seen by the le following certificate from Mrs; Min- at tnie Jacobs of Houstonr, Texas:- "I it Shereby certify that Chamberlain's Colic, Cholera and Diarrhoea Reme dy cured my husband of a severe at tack of Cuban diarrhoea, which he h< brought home from Cuba. We had tt e several doctors but they did him no es a good. One bottle of this remedy r< scured him, as our neighbors will tes- F Stify. I thank God for so valuable a a' medicine." For sale by Smith Drug f< t Co., Pelham and Son, W. G. Mayes, al and Prosperity Drug Co. st It Takes Only Three Minutes IE ed of anything [ings out of it, and assortme: tweiware, Coi County. We lead rained Ankle, Stiff Neck, Lam Shoulder. fhcse are three common ailment which Chamberlain's Pain Bair especially valuable. If prompti ilied it will save you time, mone I suffering when troubled with an e of these ailments. For sale b Lith Drug Co., Pelham and Son, X Mayes, and Prosperity Drug Cc Fainting is a great winrer in argu nts. If a woman can faint whe ngs don't suit her her husband wil vays see that she gets her way. Torture of a Preacher. [he story of the torture of Rev. C Moore, pastor of the Baptis .irch, of Harpersville. N. -., wil crest you. He says: "I suffere anies, because of a persisten igh, resulting from the grip. I ha sleep sitting up in bed. I trie ny remedies, without relief, until )k Dr. King's New Discovery fc nsumption Coughs and Cold: Li h entirely cured my cough, an ed me from consumption." tnd cure for diseased conditions c roat and Lungs. At W. E. Pelhar d Son druggist; price 5ocents an oo, guaranteed. Trial bottle fre( One strong point of many a woma at the end of a hatpin. Furious Fighting. "For stven years," writes Geo. V >ffman, of Harper, Wash.. "I had :ter battle, with chronic stomac d liver trouble, but at last I wo d cured my diseases, by the use ectric Bitters. I unhesitating Dmmend them to all, and don't it :d in the future to be without the the house. They are certainly )nderful medicine, to have cure c:h a bad case as mine." Sold, undh arantee to do the same for you, b E. Pelham and Son, druggist, cents a bottle. Try them today. By doing the hard things first y il be sure to find the rest easy. A Fearful Fate. It-hea fearful fate to Lave to e ire the terrible torture of Piles. n truthfully say," writes Har )lson, of Masonvilie, Ia., "that f lind, Bl'eeding, Itching and Pr uding Piles, Bucklen's Arnica Sah the best cure made." Also best f ts, burns and injuries. 25cents .E. Pelhama and Son, druggist. Don't open your mouth and swa w everything yeou hear-unless y<( e foolish and don't care who knox In Mad Chase. Millions rush in mad chase aft ~alth, from- one extreme of faddis another, wvhen, if they would on Lt good food, and keep their bow< gular with Dr. King's New Li ills, tiheir troubles would all pa vay. Prompt relief and quick ct >r liver and stomach trouble. 2 W. E. Peiham and.. Son's dr ore; guaranteed. YOU USE AI PEERLESS LAND FREEZER, in the HARE call on us, v nt of Hardwh mntry Hollo' the others try to I Potash iS necss:iry for cotton to produce high yields and good fibre. 6Write for our valuable books on fertilizatiun: they contain informa tion that means dollars to the farmers. Sent free on request. Write now wh;ie you think of it to the GERMAN KALI WORKS - New York- Atlanta, Ga. 93 Nau St..or = S Broad I stee. Brick! Brick!! For Sale by C. H. CANNON. d a h 7 I. i 'SUPERFINE SILVERWARE. Y In tea and coffee sets, both ster tt ling silver and plated ware. Te de and desirable with each passing year and our grandmothers' eyes would twinkle with zmazenent at the dis play to be seen here. DonieIs&WiIionisoi1 $5,00BANK DEPOSIT-= 1ORGANS eY want the BEST. We have . ly EXACTLY whatu want. Don't is wait to feel eatyready. We canA fe4MAKE you able. Ou rices are! LOW- -our terms are ESY. ssV Write us at once for catalogues,V re Aprices and terms. Address seMalsne's Music House, - ag Columbia, S. C. ...... +.+.. WARElne,0 oo . .le