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: PAINLESS SIGHT. DR. TA1.MAGK DESCRIBES THE DEVELOPMFVT OF THE ART OF HKALI^G. Christ Aluara Sought the Oldest anil Most Hope lews CnsM on Which to Perform Hla Miracles. Text: 'The blind receive their sight, and the lame walk, the lepers are cleansed, and the deaf hear."?Matthew xi.. 5. "Doctor," I said to a distinguished surgeon, "do you not get worn out with constantly seeing so many wounds and. broken bones and distortions of the human body?" "Oh, do," he answered, "all that is over- I come by my joy in curing them." A sublimer or more merciful art never came down from haaven than the art of surgery. Catastrophe and disease entered the earth so early that <>ne of the first wants of the world was a doc- tor. Our cripplid and agonized human raca , ailed forsurgeon and family physician for many years before they came. The first surgeons who answered this call were ministers of religion, namely, the Egyptian priests. Ana wnai a grniiu iiuua u mi uin uim were also doctors, all IK D.'s were M. D.'s, for there are so many cases where body and soul need treatment at the same time, consolation and medicine, theology aud therapeutics. As the first surgeons of the world were also ministers of religion, may these two profes- I sions always be in full sympathy ! But uh- I der what disadvantages the early surgeons worked, from the fact that the dissection of the human body was forbidden, first by the pagans and then by the early Christians! Apes, being the brutes most like the human race, were dissected, but no human body j might be unfolded for physiological and anatomical exploration, and the surgeons had to guess what was inside the temple by looking at the outside <>f it. If they failed in any surgical operation they were persecuted and driven out of the city, as was Arehagathus because of his bold but unsuccessful attempt to save a patieut. But the world from the very beginning kept calling for surgeons, and their first skill is spoken of in Genesis, where they employed their art for the incisions of a sacred rite, God making surgery the predecessor of baptism; and we see it again in II Kings, where Ahaziah, the monarch, stepped 011 some cracked lattice work 111 the palace and it broke, and he fell from the upper to the lower floor, and he was so hurt that he sent to the village of Ekron for aid; and Esculapius, who wrought such wonders of surgery that be was deified, and temples were built for his worship at Pergamos: and Epidaurus and rodelirius introduced for the relief of the world phlebotomy; and Datnocedes cured the dislocated ank;o of King Darius and the cancer of his queen; and Hippocrates put successful hand on fractures and introduced amputation; and Praxagoras removed obstructions; and Herophilus began dissection; and Erasistratus removed tumors; and Celsus, the Roman sureeon. removed cataract from the eye and used the Spanish fly; and Heliodorusarrested disease of the throat: and Alexander, of Tralles, treated the eye; and Rhazas cauterized for the prevention of hydrophobia, and Percival Po.* came to combat diseases of the spine; and in our own century we have had aRouxanda Larray in France, au Astley Cooper and an Aberhethy in Great Britain, and a Valentine Mott and Willard Parker and Samuel D. Gross in America, and a galaxy of living surgeons as brilliant as their predecessors. What mighty progress iu the baffling of disease since the crippled and sick of ancient cities were laid along the streets, that people who had ever been hurt or disordered in the same way might suggest what had better be done for the patients; and the priests of olden time, who were constantly suffering from colds received in walking barefoot over the temple pavements, had to prescribe for themselves, and fractures were considered so far beyond all human cure that instead of calling in the surgeons the people only invoked the gods! But notwithstanding all the surgical and medical skill of the world, with what tenacity the old diseases hang on to the human race, and most of .them are thousands of years old. and in our Bibles we read ot ttiem: the carbuncles of Job and Hezekiah; the palpitation of the heart spoken of in Deuteronomy; the sunstroke ot a ctiilrt carried irom tn?neiosor Shunem, crying: "My head! my headT' KiDg Asa's disease of the feet, which was nothing but gout, defection of teeth, that called for dental surgery, the skill of which, quite equal to anything modern, is still seen in the filled molars of the unrolled Egyptian mummies; the ophthalmia caused by the iuice of the newly ripe fig, leaving the people blind at the roadside; epilepsy, as in the case of the young man often falling into the fire, and oft into the water; hypochondria, as of Nebuchadnezzar, who imagined himself an ox, aud going out to the fields to pasture; the withered hand, which in Bible times, as now, came from the destruction of the maiu artery, or from paralysis of the chief nerve; the wounds of the man whom the thieves left for dead 011 the road to Jericho, and whom the good Samaritan nursed, pouring in oil and wine?wine to clease the wound and oil to soothe it. Thank God for what surgery has done for the alleviation and cure of human suffering! But the world wanted a surgery without pain. Drs. Parre and Hickman and Simoson and Warner aud Jackson, with their amazing genius, camo on, and with their anaesthetics benumbed the patient with nar-. cotics and ethers as the ancients did with hasheesh and mandrake, and quieted him for t while, but at the return of consciousness distress returned. The world has never seen but one surgeon who could straighten the crooked limb, cure the blind eye or reconstruct the drum of a soundless ear or reduce a dropsy, without any pain at the time, or any pain after, and that- surgeon was Jesus Christ, the mightiest, grandest, gentlest and most sympathetic surgeon the world ever saw or ever will see; and He deservqs the confiv ilence and love and worship and nosanna of ^ all the-earth and hallelujahs of all heaven. "The blind receive their sight and the lame walk; the lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear." I notice this Surgeon had a fondness for chronic cases. Many a surgeon, when he has bad a patent brought to him, has said* "Why was not. this attended to five years ago? You bring him to me after all power of reoperation is gone. You have waited until there is a complete contraction of tho muscles, and false ligatures are forme**!, and ossification has taken place. It ought to have been attended to long ago." But Christ the Surgeon seemed to prefer inveterate cases. One was a hemorrhage of twelve years, and He stopped it. Another was a curvature of eighteen years, and He straightened it. Auotner was a cripple of thirty-eight years.and "he walked out well. The eighteen-year patient was a woman bent almost double. If you could call a convention of all the surgeons of all the centuries, their combined skill could not cure that body so drawn out of shape. Perhaps they might stop it from getting any worse, perhaps they might contrive braces by which she might bo made more comfortable, but it is, humanly speaking, incurable. Yet this divine Surgeon put both His hands on her. and Ironi that doubled uu posture she began to rise, and the empurpled face began to take on a healthier hue, and the muscles began to relax from their rigidity, and the spinal column began to adjust itself, and the cords of the neck began to be more supple, and the eves, that could see only the ground before, now looked into tiie face of Christ with gratitude, and up toward heaven in transport. Straight! Attereighteen weary and exhaustive years, straight! The poise, the gracefulness, the beauty of healthy womanhood reinstated. The thirty-eight years' case was a man who lay on a mattress near the mine; al baths at Jerusalem. There were five apartments where lame people were brought, so that they could get the advantage of these mineral baths. The stone basin of the bath is still visible, although the waters have disappeared. probably through some convulsion of nature, the bath, one hundred and twenty feet long, forty feet wide and eight/ feet deep. Ab, poor man, if you have been lame and helpless thirty-eight years, that mineral bam cannot restore you. Why.thiriy-eigtn> Year.-, is more than th? average of human life! Nothing but the grave will cure you. But Christ the Surceon w?]ks along these baths, and I have no doubt passes by sonv- patients who have been only six months disordered, or a year, ^ or five years, and comes to the mattress of the man who had been nearly four decades helpless, and to this thirty-eight years' invalid said: "Wilt thou* bo"made whole?" The question as!;-?d. nut because the Surgeon did not understand the protractcdness. tho desperateness, of the case, but to evoke tho man's pathetic narrative. "Wilt thou be made whole''" "Would you like to get well?" "Oh. yes." says the rhan, "that is what I came to these mineral baths for, I have tried everything. All the surgeons have failed, and all the prescriptions have proved val unci ess. and L have got worse and worse, and I can neither move hand or foot or head. Oh, if I could only he free from this pain of thirty-eight -ears?" Christ the Surgeon could not stand that. Bending over the man on the mattress, and iu a voice tender with all sympathy, but strong with all omnipotence, He says, "Rise!" And the invalid instantly scrambles to his knees, and then puts out his right foot, then his left foot, and then stood upright as though he had never been prostrated. While he stands looking at the Doctor with a joy too | much to hold, the Doctor says: "Shoulder this mattress! for you are not only well enough to walk, but well enough to work, | and start put from these mineral baths. Take , up thy bed and walk!" Oh, what a surgeon I for chronic cases then, and for chronic cases now! This is not applicable so much to those who are only a little hurt of sin and only for a short time, but to those prostrated of sin twelve vears. eighteen years, thirty-eight years. Here is a Surgeon able to give im| mortal health. "Oh," you say, "I am so ! completely overthrown &nd trampled down of sin that I cannot rise." Are you flatter down than this patient at the mineral baths? | No. Then rise. In the name of Jesus of Nazareth, the Surgeon who offers von His I . 1 1 -r u~l_ T KJO no u; rigci iiuliu ui urijj, x um nice i ioc. of acute sin, but of chronic sin?those who have not prayed fo" thirty-eight years, those who have not been to church for thirty-eight years, those who have been gamblers, or I bertines, or thieves, or outlaws, or blasphemers, or infidels, or atheists, or all these tigether, for thirty-eight years. A Christ for exigencies! A Christ for a dead lift! A Surgeon who never loses a case! In speaking of Christas a surgeon, I must consider Him as an oculist, or eye doctor,and an aurist.or ear doctor. Was there ever such another oculist? Tnat He was particularly -orry for the blind folks, I take from the fact | that the most of His works was with the diseased optic nerves. I have not time to count up the number of blind people mentioned I who got His cure. Two blind men in one I house, also one who was born blind; so that it was not removal of a visual obstruction, [ but the creation of the cornea, and ciliary muscle, and crystalline lens, and retina, and optic nerve, and tear gland; also the b'ind man of Bethsaida, cured by the saliva which the Surgeon took from the tip of His I own tongue and put upon the eyelids also two blind men who sat by the wayside. In oar civilized lands we have blindness enough, the ratio fearfully increasing, according to the statement of Boston and New York and Philadelphia oculists, because of the reading of morning and evening newspapers on the jolting cars by the multitudes who live out of the city and come in to business. But in the lands where this Divine Surgeon operated, the cases of blindness were multiplied beyond everything by the particles of san i Ueatimr in the air. and die night dews | Calling on the eyelids of those who slept on I the top of their houses: and in some of these j lands it is estimated that twenty out of a hundred people are totally blind. Amid all t.:at crowd of visionless people, what work for an oculist! And I do not believe that more than one out of a hundred of that Surgeon's cures were reported. He weut up and down among those people who were feeling slowly their way hy staff, or led by th9 hand of man or rope of dog, and introducing them to the faces of their own household^ "to the sunrise and the sunset, and the evening star. He just ran His handover th9 expressionless face, and the shutters of both windows were swuugopen, and the restored went home, crying "I see' I see! Thank God, I see!" That is the oculist we all need. Till He touches our eyes we are blind. Yea, we were oorn blind. By nature we see things wrong (f we see them at all. Our best eternal interests are put before us, and we cannot see them The glories of a loving and pardoning Christ are projected, and we do not behold them Or we have a defective sight which ! makes the things of this world larger than [ the things or the future, time bigger than ] sternify. Or we are color blind and cauno. ' see the difference between the blackness o iarknesi forever and the roseate morning o an everlasting day. But Christ the Surgeon comes in, and though we shrink back, afraid to have Him touch us, yet He puts His fingers on the closed eyelids of the soul, and midnight becomes mid-noon; and we understand something of the joy of theyoung man of the Bible, who, though he had never before been able to see his baud before his face, now, by the touch of Christ, had two headlights kindled under his brow, cried out in language that confounded the jeering crowd who were deriding the Christ thav I had effected the cure, and wanted to matte I Him out a bad man ''Whether He be a sinner j or no, I know not; ono thing I know, that | whereas I was blind, now I see." But this Surgeon was just as wonderful as ! an aurist. Very few people have two good | ears. Nine out of ten people are particular to get on this or that side of you when they sit or walk or ride with you, because they have one disabled ear. Many have both ears damaged, and what with the constant racket of our great cities, and the catarrhal troubles that sweep through the land, it is remarkable that there are any good ears at all. Most wonderful instrument is the human ear. It is harp and drum and telegraph and telephone and whispering gallery all in I on<\ So delicate and wondrous is its construction that the most difficult of all things to reconstruct is the auditory apparatus. The mightiest of scientists have put their skill to its retuning, and sometimes they stop "the progress of its decadence, or remove temporary obstructions, but not more than one really deaf ear out of a hundred thousand is ever cured. It took a God to make \ j the ear, and it takes a God to mend it. That makes me curious to see how Christ the Surgeon succeeds as an aurist. We are told of only two cases He operated on as an ear surgeon. His friend Peter, naturally high tempered, saw Christ insulted by a man by the name of Malcbus, and Peter let his sword fly, aiming at the man's head, but the sword slipped and hewed off the out- I side ear, and our Surgeon touched the laceration aud another ear bloomed in the place of the one that bad been slashed away. But it is not the outside ear that hears. That is only a funnel for gathering sound and pour Kulrlnn qnrl mnro olflhnrflte , IIJ? J y lUbV vuo uiuu^u uuu m.w.v ? ear. On the beach of Lake Galilee our Surgeon found a man deaf and dumb. The patient dwelt in perpetual silence, and was speechless. He could not hear a note of mu sic or a clap of thunder. He could not call father or mother or wife or children by name. What power can waken that dull tympanum or reach that chain of small bcnesor revive that auditory nerve or open the gate between the brain and the outside world ? The Surgeon put His fingers in the deaf ears and agitated them, and kept on agitating them until the vibration gave vital energy to all the dead parts, ana they responded, and when our Surgeon withdrew His fingers from the ears, the two funnels of sound were clear for all sweet voices of music and friendship. For the first time in his life he heard the dash of I the waves of Galilee. Through the desert of j | painful silence had been bu'lt a king's high- ! way of resonance and acclamation. But yet he was dumb. No word had ever leaped over his lip. Speech was chained under his tongue. Vocalization and accentuation were to him an impossibility. He could express neither j love nor indignation nor worship. Our Surgeon, having unbarred his ear, will now mell the shackle of his tongue. The Surgeon will use the same liniment or salve that He used on two occasions for the cure of blind peoplr-, namely, the moisture of His own mouth. The application is made. And lo, the rigidity of j the dumb tongue is relaxed, and between the | tongue and teeth were born a whole vocabu| lary, and words flew into expression. He not ! onlv heard but he talked. One gate of his j I body swung in to let sound enter, and the ] other gate swung out to let souuu tieparr. i Why is it that while other surgeons "used , knives and forceps and probes and spectro I scopes, this Surgeon used only the ointment, ot' His own lips? To show that all the curative power we ever feel comes straight from ! Christ. And if He touches us not. we shall be ! deaf as a rock and dumb as a tomb. Oh. ' thou greatest of all aurists, compel as to hear ! and help us to speak! But what were the Surgeon's fees for all these cures of eyes aud ears and tongues and withered hands and crooked backs? The skill j and the painlessness of the operations were worth hundreds and thousands of dollars. Do I not think that the cases He took were nil | moneyless. Did He not treat the nobleman's i son? Did He not doctor the ruler's daughter? Did He not effect a cure in the house of a centurion of great wealth, who had out of I his own pocket, built a synagogue? They I would have paid Iiiin large fees if Ho haddej mnnded them, and there were hundreds of 1 wealthy people in Jerusalem, and among the 1 merchant castle# along Lake Tiberias, who i would have given this Surgeon houses and ! lands and all they had for such cures as He ! could elect. For critical crscs in our time ! great surgeous have received a thousand dotTars, five thousand dollars, and. in one case I know of, fifty thousand dollars, but the Surgeon of whom I speak received not a shekel, not a penny, not a farthing. In His v, _.?lC earthly life, we know of His having had but 'sixty-tWo ahd a ha'f cents. When His taxes were due, by His omniscience He knew of a fish in the sea which had swallowed a piece of silver money, as fish are apt to swallow anything bright, and He sent Peter with a hook which brought up that fish, and from its mouth was extracted a Roman stater, or sixty-two and a half cents, the only money Ho ever had: and that He paid out for taxes. This great Surgeon of all the centuries gave all His services then, and offers all His services now, free of charge. "Without money and without price" you may spiritually have your blind eyes opened, and your deaf ears unbarred, and your dumb tongues loosened, and your wounds healed, and your soul saved. If Christian people get hurt of body, mind or soul, let them remember that surgery is apt to hurt, but it cures, and you can afford present pain tor future glory. Beside that, there are powerful anesthetics in the divine promises that soothe and alleviate. No ether or chloroform or cocaine ever made one so superior to distress as a few drops of that magnificent anodyne: "All things work together for good to thos# who love God;'' "Weepmg may endure for a niglit, but joy cometh in the morning." What a grand thing for our poor human race when this Surgeon shall have completed the treatment of all the world's wounds! The day will come when there will be no more hospitals, for there will be no more sick, and no more eye an I ear infirmaries, for there will be no more blind or deaf, and no more deserts, for th? round earth shall be brought under arboriculture, and no more blizzards or sunstrokes, for the atmosphere will be expurgated of scorch and chill, and no more war for the swords shall come out of the foundry bent into pruning hooks. While in the heavenly country we shall see those who were the victims of accident or malformation, or hereditary ills on earth, becomes the athletes in elysian fields. Who is that man with such brilliant eyes, close before the throne? W by. that is the man who, near Jericho, was blind, and our Surgeon cured his ophthalmia! Who is that erect and graceful and queenly woman before the throne? That was the can whom our Surgeon found bent almost double, and could in no wise lift up herself, and He made her straight. Who is that listening with such rapture to the music of heaven, solo melting into chorus, cymbal responding to trumpet, and then himself joining in the anthem? Why, that is the man whom our Surgeon fouud deaf and dumb on th9 beach of Galilee, and ' by two touches opened ear gate and mouth gate. Who is that around whom the crowds are gathering with admiriag look and thanksgiving, and cries of "Oh; what He did for me! Oh, what He did for my family! Oh, what He did for the world!" That is the Surgeon of all the centuries, the Oculist, the Aurist, the Emancipator, the Saviour. No pay He took on earth. Come, now, and let all heaven pay Him with worship that shall never end, and a love that shall never die. On His head be all the crowns! In His hands be all the scepters! and at His feet be all the nvnuat An Accident to a Bonnet. A few persons on Twenty-third street recently saw a peculiar and rather distressing accident happen to a new spring bonnet that was passing down :he street on the head of a tall, slender Monde. It was a very wonderful hat, with a lace top and lace bows and some little lacc ends that poised themselves on the crown like the wings of a butterfly. The owner was walking calmly along thinking, perhaps. how uncommonly well she was looking, when a gentleman who was passing her turned suddenly and gave one startled look at the head gear, then with one snatch tore the light thing from her head and trampled it underneath bis feet. A light smoke and a little blue flame curled up from it as it lay there and the gentleman pointed signilicantly to it as he said: "Your bonnet was on fire, Madam." Evidently it had been. "I was just passing at your side," explained the gentleman, "when I saw what appeared to be smoke coming from the top of your head. I looked again and saw a ted spark in the black lace, then I snatched it off." Now, there is nothing in the nature of a bit of black lacc to induce spontanend nnlrr nrtcciKlo CUIIS tUUJUUSUUU, mm. cuv VIIIJ |/voon/iv explanation of so peculiar an occurrence is that a chance spark from the cigar of a passerby had blown into the light stuff and ignited it. Since the lace bonnet is certain to be the favorite headgear for the summer, the suggestion may not be out of place that the enterprising milliner will be the one who will provide with each bonnet she sells this season some kind of insurance policy against destruction by fire. ?[New York Sun. Ballooning as a Sport. Ballooning should be encouraged as a rccication. As there is little ballooning done in this country, very few know anything of this charming experience; and nearly all have an exaggerated idea of its danger. In Europe, and especially in Paris, free balloon ascents arc quite often made, and as a natural result the Frenchinen make good balloons. Ballooning is not more expensive than yachting, and to my mind it is much more interesting. A good silk balloon with a capncity for two people?say one holding 24.000 cubic feet of gas?costs in Frcnee $500 or $600. Here it would cost rather more. The gas is cheaper there also, but if one has a mod balloon and does his own work, the r # / whole expense of ballooning here ought not to average over $100 for each ascent. With a little previous study and the practical experience of a few trips, one can manage his own balloon. Under ordinary circumstances two persons make the best number for an ascent. A balloon club, having a fleet of well-constructed balloons, could have" excursions and races on the same plan as that of yachting and canoeing. It i.. an art or recreation that has been neglected. At all events it has been left mostly to professionals, who indulge in its most risky features and give it. the name of being a very dangerous sport, which it need not. have. Mv ex periuuee has shown me that there is more fun to he had "up in a balloon, boys," than can be discovered "down in a coal mine, underneath the ground."?[Forest and Stream. His Wife Got Even. A local doctor had an experience collecting a hill which he will not soon forget. The account amounted to $18, and. after sending monthly statements for three years, the debtor, a merchant, by the way, sent a check which, on presentation at the bank, was found to be worthless. It happened about this time that thq physician's wife wished some ' articles for the house and visited the merchant's store. She was unknown to the proprietor, who was all suavity and politeness, and although prices were a little high, she purchased a hill of goods amounting to $21. When she gave her name and address and ordered the goods sent to the house the courteous proprietor nearly fainted. He had gone so far, however. that he was ashamed not to semi the goods, which were delivered in good time. Promptly he received his worthless check by mail. Then lie began sending bills for the balance of $3. When did lie get the balance? The calendar and his books will show that the $3 were remitted just three years after the ac count was contracted, and the doctor laughs in his sleeve whenever lie thinks about it.?[St. Paul Pioneer Prcsr. A SHOPLIFTER'S \E2p?:?RIENCE Three" IncidciialH Frdmj the Life of a Skillful Female- Thief. From a curious-source) two or three incidents in the life1 of a pr ofessional thief may be set dem-n here. Tlyiy might be termed confessions of a shoplifter. Stores in both Allegheny and Pittsburg have suffered by the de|?edntions of a remarkably skillful thief, who is a woman. She prides herself on her skill in shoplifting. and it is froin her mi-uth that the following narrative originally came. Once she visited a large store in Allegheny and asked to be shr/wn some expensive cloaks. The goods were brought out, and the stylish looking chopper took off the jacket she. wore and put on a cloak. She was uot entirely satisfied with it, she said, aQd the saleswoman who was waiting upon her went off to another part of the store to get some more cloaks. This was the chief's chance. She walked away, leaving her jacket as a token of her regard, (hi the stairs? the cloak department was on the second floor?she nict one,of the owners of the store. , .? n i,? "tltlVC you DCl'Il wuucu 1I|1UU. 11 l> asked politely. "Yes. thank voir, and I nm very well satisfied with this don's," she replied, and sailed od. She escaped. Another lime she visiied a shoe store in Fittsburg.' It was no easy matter to please her the affable young salesman found. The stock of fine ladies' shoes was ransacked to suit her taste. It was all in vain, for she departed without buying anything. Under her dresss were two more shoes than a ivomau can wear, however. When she looked at the stolen shoes after arriving home she found that they were not mates. She w.%? very much annoyed; in fact, the discovery took away her appetite for supper. The next afternoon foaind her in the shoe store again. "The. shoes you sold me the other day," she taid to the salesman wVin was nnt the one who had tried to suit her fastidious tnstc the day before, "are not mates, and will you kindly exchange them?" The store was crowded?shoplifters seldom voature into an empty store?and the young man hurried off at once without further inquiry. In another minute he returned with a pair of shoes properly mated and gave them to the supposed customer. She diif not stay to give thanks for the gift. Once only did her confidence, some would call it impudence, desert her. She visited a store one morning with the intention of appropriating some ostrich plumes. As usual, she was particular about the quality of the feathers; she would look at none costing less than $6 or $7 apiece. But, although the best feathers in tbi store were brought out; for her inspection, AAe found none tha: were long enough, heavy enough, or black enough to suit her. She apologized sweetly to the young woman behind the counter for the trouble she had given her, and promised :o call again when the aew consignment?which, of course, was coin ing next week?should arrive. As she was leaving the store sac became aware that she had dropped something, and she looked behind lur. A fine ostrich feather lay on the floor; it had slipped from under the cloak where the thief had concealed it, or, to be more precise, it had not gone into the deep pocket of the cloak specially designed for its reception. She hesitated for a second, loeth to leave her prey, ancl yet. afraid to stoop clown and take it. Her assurance was Dot great enough to carry her through the sccoud theft, and she left the store. The feather was not noticed till she had gone.?[Pittsburg Dispatch. He Vint Exact. ? - > 11 ii "JJriver, bam u purujr geuuemau us lie crawled iusidethe conveyeance, "can von drive me to the corner of lltli and J streets?" "Can I drive you there?" "That's what I said." "My dear sir, I wouldn't be guilty of such an attempt, even if I had any suspicion that it would meet with success. It will, however give me great pleasure to drive the horses to whatever point yon may select and stop the vehicle promptly upon its arrival." An Upright Man. An upright nan may be one either of sterling qualities of character, or one of an erect carriage and stiff hack hone. Dealing with the latter, it is something worth knowing how to preserve this physical uprightness, nr to bring it about as a relief to a backbone that has become flexed. In this condition u man is the most useless looking object that walks. But it is so easy a thing tc ' - " i -i- i?<!?.> wnnrlrr help ms neipiessut-w, mm .. is why any remain so for any length of time. Mr. Francis Miatrer, of Chicago 111., says that he suffered five month; with lame hack, and that he was con fined to bed and could not walk. Th< doctors could not help him, he says hut .St. Jacobs Oil cured him, and h< has had no pain for five years, up tc the time of his statement. The story of the discovery of a gold mine of astounding riches in China is supported by many specifications. The gold-bearing quartz is reported to he on a peninsula across the Corean bea from the peninsula of Corea and directly west. The mountains are very precipitous, and the outcroppings of rocks rich in gold have been triced for sixtY miles. Don't Cet Gaugirt This sprint?, ai vol may havo beet before, witli your blood full of Impurities, your digestion lm palrod, appotit-; ^jo.\ kidneys aud li>cr torpid, an I whole system liable to be prostrate I1>/ disease?but get yourself into good condition au.l le.vly for th: changing and warmer weather, by tnkin; H00IV Sarsaparilla. It stands lineinale 1 for purifying the blood, giving an appetite, and for a spring medicine Hood's Sarsaparilla "For five yaarj I was sick every spring, but las year began In February to take IIool's Sarsaparilla .- . , ??l uan n ail If dai I use i iivj oimei auu uiru uvi ? ? since,'"?". W. Sloav, MIIOo, Maw. "My son wc.s e.Tllctel with the worst type o scrofula, nn<l on tue recommendation of my (Iru; pist I fjnvc him I food's Snrcaparilla. To-:Iay bo I sound and wellj notwithstanding It was said ther was not enough modlclno lu Illinois to effect a care. ?J. Ciipistian, llliorli.i, III. Dizzy, Tired Feeling "For a iT-U-clan spria; medicine my wife and think very highly of Ilootl's Snrsaparilla. It cure : my wife of sick lieadaobo and relieved mo of dlszv, tire I fcellnr."?T. H, PEtncs, Supt. Oranlt lty. Co., Concord, N. If. Hood's Sarsaparilla . Sold by all dm (fist*. SI; six for S",. Preporod on ' by C. I. HOOD .t CO., Lowell. Mass. .100 poses .One Dollar. Cruel, but to the Point. Miss Bored?"Mr. Dolley, you seem to lead an inactive life; why i$ it that you never do anything ?" Mr. Dolley?"I'm wailing for an impulse." Miss Bored (looking at I ho clock)? "I wish you could have one now." Mr. Dolley (eagerly)?"Why?" Miss Bored?"Because peoplo are usually carried away with impulse."? Philadelphia Pre**. A Clear Statement of Truths That Should be Carefully Rend and Remembered. A few years ago it was very rare indeed to find any but old or middle aged people afflicted with Kidney or Bladder Difficulties,but to-day not only are theso troubles prevalent to an alarmtno extent among the matured, but even our children between 5 and 20 years of age, are attacked and die suddenly from that insidious destroyer of .human life, Brights Disease. It is but a step from the ordinary, common Kidney disorder, to the more advanced Briglit's Disease, and it is the slight and early symptom when neglected that leads to tho fatal end, honce extreme watchfulness is essential in order to see that the Kidneys are performing their function (work) in the right manner and to detect the first departure rrom neaitu. Therefore it is the manifest duty of all to investigate and know what course to pursue and what means to use. A noted Phw'ctanHTl'cs. I have prescribed the great specific "Dr. Kilmer's Swamp-Itoet Kidney. Liver and Bladder Cure," in a great many very, very bad cases (acute and chronic) and in every instance the result was highly satisfactory. I have found it to be a wonderful Invigorating Ionic in cases of broken down constitutions; in incipient stages of Bright'* Disease. diabetes and u> inari/ troiib.ee in general. In fact, in all my experience of twentu-flre yen * as an active physician in City and Country, I have never prescribed any preparation that can compare with it. If taken occasionally it will keep the Kidneys in a heathy condition and insure one against a sudden attack. H. c. mccormick, m. d., pit. g.. Jan. 2d, 1890. Pen Argyle, Pa. The above remedy has a hime, and world wide reputation for true merit. It is prescribed and recommended by the very best Physicians, and has the largest sale of any special kidney remedy that we know of. It is sold in two sizes, I 50c. and $1, being guaranteed to give satisfaction or money refunded. Agents wanted in every locality where the above remedy is net sold by druggists. With | a little effort you can insure for yourselves a j liberal profit and extend a helping hand to your sick friends and neighbors. We send free | six beautiful Cards, sheet of Music and "Guide , to Health," to any address. When writing for Agency me ntion this paper. Da. Kilmer & Co., Binghamton, N. Y. Even the humolcsi toi er in toe land can reeoivo lt> live nir n line |>U' J>u-f . The l.mly ?.\t Door. Mr?. W. envied the lady next deer because she always seemed ro well ami happy. "She enjoys lire and I don'l," said I he discontented woman. "How J would like to change places with her'" At las. she made the acquaintance of the objeel of her envy, and this is what the lady told her: "Happy? Of course I am. for I eujcy perfect health. My dear Mrs. W? your face tells me why (par arc not happy. You arc suffering front functional derangements. I was a martyr to fe.ualc weaknesses for j ears, h' t Dr. Pierce*.; Favorite Prcrcriplion cured me. as it will you if yen will try it. It is fcttitt?meet to give rnlisfcction in every ease or price if 1) returned. Dr. Pierce's Pellets, one a dose. Cure headache, constipation'?ntl iudiifcr-lion. "The d*nr o'.d times'1 - When a greenback wns worth nhout o-ty cent?. r 6to: tfdetU FVee, sent by Craeln & Co? Phtla., Pa., to any one In U. S. or Canada, postpaid, opon receipt of 35 Dobbins's Electrical Soap wrappers. See list of novels on circulars arouna each oar. This soap lor sale by all grocers. Sword swallower* ou.ht to try 6aws awhile. '1 hey wou d be more tootucome. HALL'S CATARRH CURE is a liquid and is taken tnteriialiy. und act* directiy upon the I lood and raucous surti,c.s of the eysti-fh. Send for testimoniHle, tree. So.d ly Druggist?, 75c. F. J. CHENEY & CO, Proprs.. Toledo. 0. A lobster can't I e styled "well red" until it has been boiled. f FITS jstopped free_ by D t. Kline's Great J?erve Restorer. No .Fits after nrst days use. Marvelous cures. Treatise and S2 trial bottle free.. Dr. Kline, 931 Arch St., Phila.. Pa. An eeriy sprinc?Jumping out of bed at 5 o'clock. A Pocket Cigar Case and five of "Tnnsill'd Punch," all for 2?r, Mystery lends a charm to a.most everything except ng mince pie. Both the method and results when Syrup of Figs ia taken; i t is pleasant and refreshing to the taste, and acta gently yet promptly on the Kidneys, Liver and Bowels, cleanses the sys; tem effectually, dispels colds, head> aches and fevers and cures habitual ; constipation. Syrup of Figs is the > only remedy of its Kind ever produced, pleasing to the taste and acceptable to the stomach, prompt in its action and truly beneficial in its 3 effects, prepared only from the most healthy and agreeable substances, ? its many excellent qualities com, mend it to all and have made it - the most popular remedy known. Syrup of Figs is for sale in 60o and $1 bottles by all leading druggists. Any reliable druggist who may not have it on hand will pro .1 rt 1 _ cure it promptly lor any one wno w^hes to try it Do not accept any substitute. CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP CO. I SAN FRANCISCO. CAL. [ LRVISVILLE, KY. NEW YORK. N T. ' How She Behaved, i The negro makes us laugh because [ he will say things which he should have left unsaid, and sav them without the least intention of giving offense. An admirable illustration of this sort ; of humor is given in the "Editor's ? Drawer" of Harper's. Briefly told, it ' is as follows: ' Samson, the colored janitor of an apartment hou-e in which Mr. and Mrs. Kobineon occupy a flat, is not . -i - T_._ir ?i. , j treated ov ineir irtsii i-uua ??nn wo deference which he thinks due to his r position. Odo morning when, at the going up f and down of the coal-scuttle, Samson had been worsted in a wordy encoun* ter, his wounded dignify could stand it ?, no longer. Stopping Mr. Robinson on the front stairs, he complained to him of his sharp-tonguod servant. "What Samson wished to say was 1 that the girl assumed as much author1 itv as if she were one of the ladies of ? the house. What ho did say w as this: "Mr. Robinson, that girl of yours hus ordered me round, an' yelled at mo down the elevator shaft, an' b'.owed ij me an' jawed me until you'd have thought it war Mra. Robinson herself " PAT'S DI Bhure, docthor, this pi Be Jabbers! I'm all I hopo you will thry 1 For bclave mc, I cni Well. Pat, I will try and relieve you, Tduced), (With a smile.which Pat's speech had jnAnd if you can't "lay" nor "set" either, Perhaps you had better just roost! For Liver Disease, Biliousness, Indigestion, Scrofula or any blood-taint or disorder, the "Golden Medical Discovery" is the only remedy possessed of such superior curative properties as to warrant its manufacturers in selling it, through druggists, under a positive guarantee that it will either benefit or cure in every case, or money paid for it will be- refunded. It's * legitimate medicine, not a beverage ; contains no alcohol to inebriate, no syrup or sugar to derange digestion. As wonderful in itc curative results as in its pcculipr composition. It stands alone,-incomparable! Therefore, don't be fooled into accepting something instead, said to be "just as good," because the substitute pays the dealer a better profit. The equal of the " Golden Medical Discov cry has not been invented ; it it ever is. it won't be sold for a less price than what the "Discovery" costs, viz: $1.00, or six bottles for $5.00. It's a concentrated vegetable ex ? \SSOO ? flflrr I ^ the v w symptoms of catarki Br / falling into throat, sometime Cy f V " tenacious, mucous, purulent, if \ VS deafness, difficulty of clcarin rv-jarrix . breath offensive; smell and 1 VifTPV.few of these symptoms lllcel result in consumption, and c: By its mild, soothing1, antiseptic, cleansing cures the worst eases. Onlv 50 rents. Soh "Oh, So Tired!" is the cry of thousands every Spring. For that Tired Feeling take Ayer's Sarsaparilla and recover Health and Vigor. It Makes the weaK strong. Prepared by Dr. J. C. Ayer & Co., Lowell, Mass. They hare been tried fct over fifty yeire, and are to-day the meet popalar in ute. Yonx fathers and mothers used them. They are the Safest, Pnroct, and Best Remedy for,Liver and Stomach Diseases ever compcnnded. Tor 8ale by all Dnigjri.K Prtce 2-S eta. p?r box; 8 boxes for CI cl..; or ?^nt by mall, po.tago free, on r.*o. t I. A Knn. Phll.1V IT YOU WI8H A . good HETOLVER 1 ) purchase one of the celebrated 8*flTH * WE83ON armSL The fineet Krnall arms ff lV\7 nS&\ rrer manufactured and the IV J/ )) IDjBlJ Srat choloo of all expert*. Befit [anu/actured In calibre* 32,3sand 44-1C0. Sin- [DW gteordouble action, Safety Hunmerleca and \253f Target modeu. i;ons;n:cie<i caumjui ocu <? nitty wrought eteel, carefully inspected for wortmanshlp and atock, they are unrivaled for flntaht durability npd nccuracy. Do not be deceivedor cheap mallenble cast-iron Imitations which are often sold for the genuine article and are not gnlv unreliable, but dangerona. The SMITH ft WESSON Revolvers are all atamped upon the barrela withflT~"'*-oame, addreea ami datej of cabota and an gUM.nnrerd perfeot in every dataU. Inaiet upon baring the genuine article, and If your dealer cannot supply you an order eent to addreae below will receive prompt and careful attention. BeocrptivecrttAloirio and nricea fnrolehel upon apSMITH & WESSON, WHeuUonthissaoec. ttDrlngtleld. Unsa. e \ /J0NES\ / TON SCALES \ / OF \ $60 6INGHAMT0N V Beam Box Tare Bean J N. Y. \j Vr""1// ' \v * Jy D ETE CT I VES Wasted ia crery Couotv 3Lrewd men to act under Instruction! 1* our Secret Service. (Experience uot necessary. Particulars free. Graanan Detective Bureau Co. 44 Aresiv.CiEciisaii.C. B-Dr rai 6VtTE?lJi. (HUH agp Wrj COLD in HEAD^ / snuffles CATARRH.HIAY-FEVER A pa'licle is nppliel inlo oicJi n JStril and is agras ?hli>. I'nc? H' els. nt druggist-; ny na i, registered, > ) els. KLV UKOTUKKS. ji Warren Sc.. .Seer Vori. To core Biliousness. Sick Headache. Constipation, Malaria. Liver Complaints, take the aafo and certain remedy. SMITH'S BILE BEANS Use the SMALL SIZE (40 little beans to the bottle). They are the most convenient; suit all age*. Price of either site. 23 cents per bottle. |?|C&BMOnt7> 17- 70: Photo-gramm l\IOOI3t! Vs panel site of thla picture for 4 conu (coppers or atamp6). J. F. SMITH 4 CO.. Maker*of "Bile Beans." St. Loot*, Mot I LEMMA. ; ain ie jist awful 1 of a sweat! :o rolave it, a't lay nor set! But, Pat, for the pain you complain of. Simply roosting alone might not do, I think I would try Dr. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery, too. ' A. z&ci tract. Dose small and pleasant to the taste. Equally pood for adults or children. To invigorate the liver, sharpen the appetite, improve digestion, and build up both strength and flesh, when reduced below the standard of health, it ranks pre-eminent Has the largest sale of any medicine inthe world, without a single exception / * ?. For all itching, scaly, festering, burning, ^ tormenting Skm and Scalp diseases, it Is especially efficacious. Salt-rheum, Tetter, Psoriasis", Erysipelas, Eczema, and all humors. from a common pimple or eruption to the worst Scrofula, vanish under the use of fhi'5 wrvrlrl fnmpfl rpmpHv if continued for a reasonable length of time. Scrofulous .- ? Sores and Swellings are cured, and the ? : ^ most tainted systems are. by its somewhat persistent use, cleansed from the most virulent blood-uoisons and completely renovated '>< and built up anew. World's Dispensary Medical Association, Proprietors, Buffalo, N. Y. . r* PPERED for an incurable case of Catarro in the Head by roprietors of DR. SAGE'S CATARRH REMEDY. I.?rfeadache, obstruction of nose, discbarges a profuse, watery, and acrid, at others, thick, . bloody and putrid: eyes weak, ringing in ears, g throat, expectoration of offensive matter; asto impaired, and general debility. Only a 7 to be present at once. Thousands of cases nd in the grave. . and healing properties. Dr. Sage's Remedy i hy druggists everywhere. (QCUAt AN D S2 SHOE 90 OnUCi for GENTLEMEN And lither Advertised Specialties Aretha 1 Bern iii the World. None genuine unless name and price are stamped on bottom. SOLD EVERYWHERE. If your dealer will not supply you, send postal for Instructions bow to buy direct from factory without extra charge. W. I.. DOUGFiAS, Itruckion. .llaas. AFTER ALL OTHERS FAIL - : CONSULT ]>1C. I.Ottn, 349 North Fifteenth Street, Philadelphia. Twenty years' experience lu special diseases; cures the worst cases of Karroos Complaints, Blood Tolsonlcg, Blotches, Eruption* Piles, Catarrh, Ulcers, Sores, Impa'red Memory, Despondency, Dimness of Vision, Lung, Lira* Stomach. Kidney i.Brlghl's Disease); confldonUaL larcall or write for question Ust aud book. ?? .<< " 18 B Plso'fl Remedy for Catarrh Is the fl| Best, Easiest to Use, and Cheapest, ISold by druggists or sent by moll. ? 50c. K. T. Hazeltluc, Warren. Pa. 03%SB BBQ ?*?' WHISKEY HAB- ' a RAgg ITS cared at home wlth9 H H EhH p,,t l'B,n- Look of nnru tal&srEDM >iculara rent FREE urn jijlh u u- M-w OOLLKV, 4L U' ATLANTA. GaT Ofllce ?x Whitehall 8t iFRAZEBg^l BEST IN THE WORLD UlltHvfc Pf Get the Genuine. Sold Everywhere PATENTS-PEHSIOHSTiX^^S digest of Pension and bounty laws. Send for Ini ventors' Guide or How to Get n Patent. Patrick j U'Parrklu Attorney at Low, Wasnlncrton, D. O. finiKIA JIA It IT. Only Ortaia aai Hrialffl rosrCHUEIn ib? World. d3 UriUifl J. j? STEPHENS, LaUnoa.^ Money in Chickens ' If yon know bow to property own 'M rnrihnm t'nr>2.t rmli In nUmit t'Cf A yon can procure a 100-1'AGE BOOK /.'/ / \ giving the experience of ? practl/ \ r*l 1?< ultry Kaiser?not an imx / >f S tenr. but a m*n working for dot* Stars and cent?during * period of , -J* years. It teaches you how tf Detect and Cure Diseases: to F?w | 1 I * for Eggs and also foe F ttenlng; I I which Fowls to Save for Breeding I \ Pnrpos-e: and everything, nrteed, ' ron should know on th;s subject to make It profit* abl*. Sent postpaid fo 'l.jc. HOOK PliB. HOUSE. 134 Loouitrd Street. N. Y, Cltf^'MOTHERS M.felEHD" hi i rro'crtbe and fu'ly endorse ntg (J as tb' omly /CJSsfce" Or. rein swa specific forthccertai cure /ggTl ?0 5 OATH.sSa of this disease. ag?antL-tnU^l not ion G.U.INCItAHAM.M. Dmc" Amsterdam, N. Y. P* k?,-? cfliH n fn? ? many year*, and "it baa r?anE?c'iven lhe h9st ?* \jK\ OlcoinnctlJEHSta f , 'tlon. $*2^ Ohia. D. R. OYC'HEACO.. w yy ? rbicaco, in. it.... .-il S ! .00. Sold by Druggists. ChiCnc^'.i. y c- MOLiSH mmmmi pills a REC CROSS DIAMOND BRANO. J .tL> oE bafts *aJ alwayn reliable. Lmd(en. A IV t. (,) ! < P:nj::?: fj.- Diam^nU Urand. to ff\ fltt? /-r rci!. mi'iailie !?*. ?. with bine ??V\ 9H> " p.. _rlHbvn. Take n? other. All pllli Xyy M y- . K-C la paetebnael boie., pult wrappera. are Y3y QHH I / ? (If dangerooa coitnterfelta. Send 4c. ? SiP^B l^. Jg I'taiurel Tor particular*, leiitmoolali and . B# 2> " llcll't for UJItA" in liiii.*. Iij rtirea \ tj mull. Xii-nr Paper. f^W > r~r Ihletrciler lhem'1 to.. Had'toa BOnPhUa^Pli