The Camden journal. [volume] (Camden, S.C.) 1866-1891, July 11, 1872, Image 1
THE CAMDEN JOHMAL.
AN
NDEBENDENT FAMILY PAPER,
PUBLISHED BY
JOHN KERSHAW, j
SUBSCRIPTION KATES.
One year, in advance $2 50
Six months . - 1 50
Three months - 75
Transient Advertisements must be paid
Ter in advance.
(From the Washington Capital.)
Our Rural Artist.
WHAT HE SAW AND DID ON HIS FIRST VISIT
tO THE CAPITAL CITY.
<1 * ?
After finding a boardingbouse, I immedi-,
onntfnl hiiildincr. not Olilv to
f'
.. .. .. . '
VOL. XXXI. CAMDEN, S. C., THURSDAY, JULY 11, lSTS. NO. 45
? ?
?W/I J ?4DIWU VUV VHVIVWI w ^
see the largest building in which I own
any interest, (this, you know, belongs to the
people,) but to meeft the senators and members
trom my own State. I met Senator
Hopity-Go-Three, whom I had helped to
select, and who told me at the time how very
glad he was to get my help. He now looked
blandly on me, failed to remember my
hame, and when told who I was, took me
tenderly by the hand, and, on account of
pressing business, asked to be excused. I 1
excused.him, and turned on my heel a wiser
and a sadder man, and with strango rcflec- 1
tions left the door of the Senate and passed
through a long hall under the dome, and
through another long hall beyond the dome, 1
to the Houso of Representatives. Here at ]
the door I met a man dressed up in brass 1
buttons, who asked what I wanted I told \
him I wished to see Colonel Jackson 0?. J
He kindly asked me to wait until he saw if {
the Colonel was iu the House. He soon re- '
turned, said he was, wild told mc that?since 1
this was Saturday, the day in which no
business is done, the day in which the mem- '
' bers read long speeches to which nobody 1
listens and eret loudly applauded when no J
one hears?I could go in, and in I went. I '
saw the several congressmen from my State, '
who met me kwidly, and when told 1 was to
6t2w<eome weeks, askted me to call often, 1
end by every mark of kindness aud consideration
made me feel uuder many obligations. '
I nex? followed Ben Butlor down in the '
cellar: of the Capitol building to a large eat- '
ing-house. I was not hungry?I never 1
drink?so I stood and looked at Ben until I 1
found jt qeccssary to move ou to keep from (
smiling audibly, at that comical-looking
countenance which he carries with him. 1
I now went round into another part of (
the cellar where is a statue of Tccumsch, c
the Indian chief, as natural as life and *
twice as large. I looked at this about five
minutes, aud passed round to the statue of '
the kind-hearted philanthropist and states- 1
man, Abraham Lincoln. T looked on this
with strange emotions of love for the man, 1
but not with the same delight as on his '
statue up stairs, which was made by that J
versatile, irresistible little artist, Yinnie ?
Beam. *
I now went out on the portion in the J
center of the building where are several y
wore picture's and statues, one of which I 1
t.nnk to ho Victoria C Tilton. who with one ?
eye not quite as wide open as'the other is 1
looking a string , athletic man, who holds a '
play ball in his right Land, lovingly in the J
face, inspiring him to throw the ball over '
into a woods pasture to George Washington, *
who with uplifted hand sits ready to catch
it on the fly. 1
I now went down the steps, across the 1
road, through a gate and into the field ^
where George is kept. I found him porch- '
ed up on a wall about six feet high, uiadc
of nice speckled stone hewed smooth with a '
pick. I now had the pleasure of seeing <
the'serene countenance of the Father of his !
Country. I should have enjoyed it much 5
better had not a man with a smooth plug 1
hat and new store clothos, who seemed to .'
kaocv, said it was not a good statue. lie '
f urther told me it cost $40,000; aud that it
broke a ship all to pieces in bringing it 1
over from Rome.
While standing in front of the statue I saw '
that George had lost the first joint of the '
great toe on his left-hand foot. This, the '
man who wore the store clothes told mo, \
was shot off while acting as aid to General ]
Braddock in the war between the English *
assisted by the American colonies, against (
the French aided-by the Indians, aud which 1
war happened some time before the Revolu- 1
tioa.
I now passed round to the north side of '
* - x {
tne statue, wnere a man is ariving a mum ui
spirited horses hitched to a. cart. The man 1
is standing up on the cart and holding the 1
reins in his left hand and a black-snake
whip (painted white) in his right. lie
has just given one of the horses a sharp
stroke with the whip and has raised the whip
fco strike the other horse. The horses see
their danger and have reared on their hind 1
feet for a run, and have the appearance of '
making it lively for the driver unless he sits 1
down and behaves himself. 1
I noxt went on the south side of the statue 1
where are < two children, obe lying on its 1
face, evidently to keep the sun off while it 1
takes a nap; the other, half reclining on its 1
back and holding a largo worm in its right 1
hand while another worm is wound around 1
its left arm, getting badly hurt by being
pressed between the arm and the stone". I 1
make no doubt this child is intent on going
a-fishing, and is holding these worms for
bait to be used as soon as the sleepy one will
wake up and go with him.
But there was one thing that sorely perplexed
me, and concerning which I could
arrive at no satisfactory conclusion; and
like a wise man who always confides in the
better judgment of hh wife, I hastened home
and found her. I asked her to go with me
to the field; I led her around o.n the south
side of the statue and showed her the children
and asked her to inform me with regard
to the sex. I think she at first failed to get
my mean ing, when in my most winning
tones I asked,
"Are they boys or girls ?"
Her eye now twinkled; her lips wreathed
in pleasant smiles, and she answered without
a moments hesitation that "she thought
they were." The sex of the children beiug
definitely settled, my wifo, 'with an entire
change of countenance and great concern,
felt my 'head, asked if I had fever, and
wanted to know why I wished to know anything
definitely about the children. I then
I then told her I proposed to write an
article for Donn Piatt's paper, or write a
lecture, and like George Francis Walker or
Dr. Mary Train, deliver it at fifty cents ad
mittance, (children half price.) My wife
now said I was tired, and told me to think
no more on the subject until had a good
sleep.
Yours truly,
Rural Artist.
Riot. Assault and Attempt to Kill.
SICK CHAMBER OF A DYING WOMAN DISREGARDED.
On Sunday, 23d June, one James Maloncy,
who is reputed to be Assistant United
States Marshal, accompanied by Peter Simmons,
(ablack nigger,) Oscar Cannon, cop.
por-colored, (a penitentiary bird,) and Willis
Johnson, ("yaller nigger,") went to my
store at Cross Roads, and ordered a lad,
Master Wells who slept in the store with my
- * *?- krtv infn fhrt store.
HUH, a IUUHCL'11 J cai \ti\x W";i ,
stating that he should shut himself in, and if
lie came out. that the guard that he (Malo- (
ucy) was going to place around the store
would shoot him. Mr. Smith, who was paying
a visit to Mr. Wells, was then rudely as- .
vaulted, and ordered to march to my dwell- (
rag house, about half a mile from the store, (
;ach of the cowardly fellows single-filing' ,
behind him as close as they could walk, lock ,
step. Smith's life was threatened and lie 1
was assured that if he made any noise what- (
jver, he would be shot. About half way be- ,
twecn the store and dwelling, my son, going
from supper to the store (where lie and master
Wells slept,) was pounced upon by two.,
big niggers, his arms hold behind himwhilst <
Maloney stood in front of him with a pistol
presented at his breast, swearing that he ]
would*shoot him through. After lie had kept ]
the boy in this position till after the coward- .
I}', tormenting, evil spirit was satisfied, they |
turned him loose, telling him to keep in the ,
path to the store, and if he turned to the ]
right or left lie would be shot by men statiou- ,
;d in the woods for that purpose. <
The file being re-arranged as before, with <
Smith being forced to lead, the night being ]
lark, and the foliage of the oaks being very .
lense, they came into my yard near the piaz:a.
where Tr. Solin J. Jlarre, Mr. D. M. ,
iVard, Mr. T. T. Perry and myself were sit- \
:inpc?(my wife was in her room at the point ,
>f death, having been quite ill fyr some time) j
?and they shouted, to our surprise: ''Shoot {
:vcry d d rascal that comes out of the
louse: Shoot! Shoot!" I did not know
vhat it meant, Piobbers, Lowcry's gang, |
iverything flitted across 103* brain. The t
ihouting, shooting, all. all; what does it mean? j
[ advanced to meet them at the steps: Perry (
vas with me; Parrc and Ward jumped into j
lie yard, liarre received a severe wound; j
several attempts ftcre made to shoot Ward, <
jut failed. The alarm to 1113' wife was so 1
sudden, and when Parrc said ;'I am shot," ,
>he thought it was tho voice of our eldest 1
ion, and became so frightened that her re- <
;overy is now hopeless. '
As soon as I could, I ascertained what ]
vas tho matter. Maloncy said he had a <
varrant for. the arrest of Ward whom lie had <
hiled to arrest. What Ward was charged ]
ivith he did not make known. Said he had ]
lad a warrant for Perry. Perry said "if you ]
lave, I aui ready to go with you." Put he
^Maloney,) apologized to Jiarre; said "I
lm very sorry that you got shot, but 1 have
i warrant for you, although it is ol'little importance;
sonic negro lias a charge against
you; you can stay hero with Mr. Blcase, i
mil if you get well, report to inc at your conreniet.co."
I told my sou to go quickly for i
i physician, that Barrc would bleed to death. 1
A.s be started off, a nigger drew down on 1
him with a pistol, saying; "If you lcabc de 1
house, I will shoot you." None of us were 1
irmed, but were enjoying the quietness of 1
he holy Sabbath evening, and awaiting anx- j
lously pn her who appeared almost done with 1
;he things of this world, when we were poun- <
;ed upon by these fiends, who pretended to 1
epresent the officers of America. I kn.ow
lothing of tho officials of tho county, never '<
iiaving taken any part, whatever in politics; 1
liaving all my life pursued my peaceful avo- '
;ation of farmer, artisan and merchant; hut, '<
if these he their representatives, "(Jod gave
the country." i
Tiios. AV. Blease. i
How tho Deacon Got Caught. '
We have no hesitancy in stating that i
anioug the able-bodied male adults of this
city the very common beverage known as '
soda water, and which is dealt'out so unsparingly
at every corner during the heated
term, is considered, to use their own language,
i "thin drink." Uut as this ingenious mixture
of wind and water is termed "thin,"
strong liquors, such as whiskies, are altogether
too "thick" for a steady warm weather drink,
bo the imbiber who must "moisten his llucs"
with sonic liquid refreshment, scoks a pleasant
combination of the two classes of drink,
which forms a happy combination that cxhilcratcs,
yet is not intoxicating. It is customary
among these bibulous go-betweens to
enter a drug store, call for soda water, name
their syrup, at the same time giving a wink
to the dispenser of "slush," who takes the
goblet, in which he places the syrup, then
slnnns down bonnnfh t.lin pniintm* nr rr>firo?
to a back room, where, b_, some mysterious
chemical change, the contents are' colored
darkly, and the soda is then let in upon the
mixture, which is handed to the customer
with a wink from the clerk. Ho much lbr
the process; now for the sequel.
Saturday, a venerable gentleman from the
country, who is a respectable church deacon,
a Justice of the Peace, a member of the
"Baud of ll??pe," and a flood Templar in his
native village, came to this city
to trade a little in dry goods and purchase
such agricultural implements as lie needed
to plant and cultivate his spring crops. The
deacon is strictly temperate, and never looks
upon the wine when it is red any more than
he does when it is any other color. Unfortunately,
our old friend suffered from opthalmia
in his early "days, which left him with
an optical peculiarity which caused his upper
eye-lid to drop every few seconds,*and to
those not familiar with his inlirmity, gave
him the appearance of intentionally winking
The "deac" is passionately fond of sodn
water and such light beverages. He loves
to feel the gaseous compound coursing down
his throat, aud creating internal commotions
and typhoons, that, however eudurable by
older persons, throw babies into agony, and
require prompt doses of peppermint; so on
Saturday afternoon, after he had bought a
few shovels, plows, aud a Dolly Vardon for
his wife, lie thought ho would fill up with
soda water and drive on toward home, lie
entered a drug store, inquired the prico of
the desired refreshment, then deposited his
scrip and awaited his mixture.
"What syrup do you want 1" said the urbane
clerk, as ho mopped off tho marble
counter with the sama towel ho used a moment
before to remove the honest sweat from
his brow.
"Oh ! give me sasaparilly; that's about as
healthy as anything, I guess." (Here the
deacon's eye-lid went back on him and dropped
quickly.)
// 4 n - ?l.i. )> 1:_j r.
"AJI ri^ui/, rupncu luu iuuuuuu li-huui,
as ho disappeared below the counter and
came up a moment later with the
drinking glass containing about three fingers
of "sasaparilly," to which ho added the other
ingredients, and handed it to the deacon.
The latter drained the contents to the very
dregs' then brushed the froth from his mouth,
smacked his lips, and said : "That syrup is a
leetle stronger than they generally make it,
but my blood is out of ordor, and I guess I'll
take anothor glass;" at the same time his
eye-lid fluttered meaningly as before.
The dose was repeated, .and the soda-water
bibber left the shop. About half an hour
later ho entered another establishment whero
i sight announced "Soda and Mineral Water
on Draught." It was noticed that the
deacon walked as if he had the string.halt as
lie entered the door, and his spectacles were
upside down on his nose, lie called for
'Congress water" at that place, saying he
'did not feel quito right, and was afraid he
bad used too much syrup in his soda-water
it the other store, or else he was bilious."
His optical weakness exhibited itself as he
spoke, and returning the wink, the clerk retired
to a dark closet, then returning, filled
ip the glass with plain "Congress," and gave
X to our now "tightually slight" friend, who
swallowed it without a murmur.
How many "sodas" the deacon stored
iway before lie left the city, wo arc unable
env liiif lin tvnc fniiTwl lntrt in d.-iv
" -?ji ? ? ?j i
asleep in bis wagon, with a plow point for a
pillow and several yards of Dolly Varden
:alico gracefully draped about his person
'or a covering. lie revived sufficiently to
nform a stranger that lie had been "drugged,"
and a subsequent visit to tho localities
where he had taken soda water developed
the fact that his unfortunate habit of
ivinking?a defect over which he had no
rontrol?was the cause of all his trouble,
fiic soda water dispensers supposed liiui to
bo "one of the boy*," and every tiuio his
;yc-lid dropped, took the hint. The dcaoon
jscapcd tho ''jim^auis," but say's hereafter
be will wear a blinder over that eye when
be purchases summer drinks, or else write
bis order 011 a slate.? Clcvcluml Leader.
Poking Fun at a Eailroad.
Mr. Derrick Dcdd writes as follows to the
Washington Capital about the brgneh railroad
between Baltimore and the Capital:
But about this railroad. Of course I want
it abolished, as every one does. The reckless
velocity with which the trains arc run
between here and Baltimore is absolutely
frightful. I was delighted years ago when
this road was established because 1 thought
ive had got rid of the old rickety and dan'
n . . 1 l.i xl. . J1
^erousiy last, stage coacnes, dui. uie speeu
they arc beginning to run the trains at now
on this road is worse yet. Now, every one
knows that Baltimore is forty miles from
Washington if it is an inch, and three days and
:? half is plenty quick enough for the. trip,
but the managers have already reduced the
schedule time to three days and four hours,
and what with making the engine fires too
hot, and racing with cows along the road,
and all that, the conductors are even cutting
that time down.
Why, * it was only the other day on the
down trip we. happened to spy Sims' old
mule about two miles out of town. What
should the reckless wretch of an engineer do
but clap on full steam and race every foot
of the way into the district? We didn't exactly
pass the mule, but caught with him
twice, and came into the depot neck and
neck?and which was puffing the most, the
mule or the engine, you couldn't have told
to save your life. Now, it was all very exciting.
and all that, I know, but I hadn't
purchased au .accident ticket, and I don't
believe the other four passengers had either.
This is all wrong, Mr. Editor, all wrong.
And then on another occasion, I remember,
we camo within a hair's breadth of having
a very serious accident. The engineer
had gotten off to snowball a chipmunk, and
and the conductor was minding a young widow's
baby for her?the result was that the
train happened to got on a down grade and
wo started off at a terrific rate, every bit of
four miles an hour, I should think. "We
were just half a mile above Annapolis junction,
aud the first thing we knew there being
110 one to whistle and and wake up the
switch-tender, we were turned off into the
Annapolis road and went down the wrong
t.mpk nt. full mined. Imairine our constcrna
tion when just at this moment we heard the
whistle, not a half mile ahead of us, of the
Annapolis up train. We were paralyzed
with terror. Here were two trains approaching
each other on the same track at the
dizzy speed above mentioned. Evidently
our time had come! In a few short hoursthe
engines would meet, and then?destruction
! With great presence of mind a minister
on board organized a prayer-meeting.?
Pale but calm, the doomed band of 'passengers
sat, and though with the very shadow
of death upon them, raised their voices in a
parting hymn.
"Send for the baggage-master," said a
young man with a sad smile.
"Why ?" was asked,
i "Because wo aro all about to pass in our
i chocks."
i Everybody wept. From the rear platform
i wo could see the miserable engineer strain
ing every nerve to catch uf>, but ho had
tight boots on and didn't gum anything to
speak of.
At this moment a ray of hope dawned
upon us. I had just finished writing my
will on the back of a vfsiting card when I
observed a young lady in the act of dotach'
ing her, bustle. Placing the article?which
was coipposed of 800 Capitals and a hair mattress?jphdor
her arm, t[ic heroine marched
through the car. We followed her anxiousb
She climbed upon the tender and then
over tl'^e engine. It was very interesting
and thrilling to see her climbing over the
wheels and br.iss things on the way to the
cowcatcher. It reminded me of a country
girl getting over a wire fence. But never
mind about that now. Let me see where I
was. Oh ! yes?on the cow-catcher. Holding
on by the cross-bars with one hand, the
noble maiden tied the bustle on the sharp
prow with the other.
You can guess the result. In the course
of the afternoon the collision came on. Protectpd
thus the engine received a gentle
buuip and we were saved !
I took up a collection for the woman on
tho spot. I always take up collections on
such occasions. And what's more, I uever
forget to give the object interested something
nioe out of it, never. There is nothing
mean abjut me. I suppose you have noticed
my clothes ?
The Hair-pins and Garters, etc-, that
are Picked up after the Audlende
Leaves.
[From the New York World.]
I don't know which is the,more curious
study, the little world before or the little
world behind the scenes. Perhaps you think
there is nothing interesting in the conduct
of an audience; and yet the man in tho boxoffice
of a theatre will tell you, if you got
hold of him sometime when he has a dull
night, a very curious story about the pleasure-seekers.
I was in the little chubbyhouse
at Wallack's not long ago, with my
friend Livingstone, and Mr. Mo?s pointed
out to us the the box-office museum. It was
a collection of articles picked up in the
theatre after the audience left it. Now, you
will immediately guess what some of these
articles Xiair-pios and garters and
pennies, you know, abound wherever men
and women congregate, and handkerchiefs
arc always picked up in churches and theatres.
Put tho collection included night
keys, gold rings, faro chocks, playing cards,
false curls, reticules, card cases and toothpicks.
We can even understand How these
things may be dropped occasionly. But how
arc we to understand tho absenoe of mind
which covers the loss of fa sc teeth, and indispensable
underclothing? There is a fine
pair of low patent-leather shoes, taken off
during the performance, because they hurt
tho owner's feet, evidently. But it is incomprehensible
that lie- should forget to put
them on.again and walk out in his stocking
feet. There is a beautiful set of fake teeth
on a gold plate. Can it be that they fell to
the Hoor unobserved during the open mouthed
wonderment and abstraction of the spec
tutor, or were they too, taken out for comfort's
sake, and slipped into the folds of a
dross iustead of a pocket, and then lefy behind
when then owner got up ? A dog-collar,
too, by all that's odd with "Fido" on its brass
plate, and a bottle of "cold cream" and a paper
of brass.headud tacks. But even this
should not astonish us, when wo ascertain
that the lap-dog themselves are sometimes,
left behind, and Mr. Moss has to send out
for milk and other delicacies, and, and turn
the box-officc into a nursery until a waitingmaid
comes, as she inevitably does the next
day, with a warm blanket, over her artn, and
reclaims the darling with tears in ner eyes.
Then wc have a safe-key. Ha! what a tale
of carelessness and reprimand and suspicion
that tolls; and a bank-book, and a Colt's revolver
with all the barrels loaded except one,
nn.l flint, nnrt sninlrv and hermined. It is
fanciful to suppose that soino cunning miscreant,
whose victim was duly reported among
the killed, came with the crowd to the theatre
to escape detection, and left his instrument
behind him. Why there's a bunch of skeleton
keys ! How do we knew that they were
not loft by the same person ?
A Mine op Soap.?The Pueblo (New
Mexico) Chief has the following:
The other day one of our prominent citizens
rode out up the mountain three or four
mile on a prospecting tour, and at a certain
point near the banks of the stream noticed
some rocks of peculiar formation. Instigated
by that curiosity so fatal on a certain
momentous occasion to old mother Eve, he
broke off a piece, and taking it to the creek,
plunged it into the water for the purpose of
ascertaining its consistency and grain. Upon
taking it out of his hands, what was his
, surpriso to see a lather formed, and with a
vigorous rubbing the stone proved to have
saponacuons qualities, in faot, possessing all
the cleansing virtues of the most excellent
soap. Greatly surprised, not a little mystjuea,
with the profound conviction withal, that he
had found a big thing, our discoverer hastily
gathered up a few specimens and brought
them to the drug store of Dr. P. It. Thumbs,
where it is now on exhibition and can be
inspected and tested by tho curious. The
stone is of a dun color, about the hardness of
chalk, and forms a perfect lather, while it
effectually removes all stains and groaso spots
from clothing. Wo have tried the poup pcr1
sonally, and must pronounce it a success.?
' After bathing it loaves the skin as .soft and
smooth as that of a new born babe, while the
odor is quito pleasant. It is certainly a re?
' markable discovery, and the only query now
is, ''what next ?" A country that can proL
duce mouutains of gold and silver, narrow
gauge mules, tarantulas, flea-bitten dogs, and
1 mines of soap to wash the whole with, must
bo capable of producing almost any wonder.
A Watch in a Man's Body.
A few days since, we published an extract
from one of the Northern papers in which
it waa stated that a man was shot during the
war, ami that a portion of a Bilver pencil
case and a gold pencil were driven into his
body. A portion of the latter has just worked
out through his neck. The case appears
singular, and may be doubted by some, but
there is o* the ^records of surgery a more singular
caso, and one in which the reoovory of
the patient may be deemed miraculous. It
was that of a gold watch being entirely shattered
and driven into & man's body through
the ribs and lungs, and of the pieces being
afterwards extracted or ejected, and the recovery
of the patient. The gentleman who
survived this terrible injury is our townsman,
R. Q. Drummond, Esqr.,and he is now alive, 1
and except the disqualification from physical
labor, he is apparently well. On tho 5th of
January, 1841, he accidentally shot himself in
the left side with a gun loaded with shot, the
o>>!lriniT ? onlrl in his
WUUie uuai^c Obiiaiug t* ? ??<*>_
pocket.'and driving it iato his body, through
the lungs, breaking i u its passage several of
his ribs. The watch was of course torn to
pieces, and the fragments scattered through
the body, fortunately missing tho heart. In
two weeks from the accident some of the pie.
ces were taken out, and at intervals from that
time, for fifteen years afterwards, when the
last piece was ejected from tho mouth, after .
having, caused one hundred hemorrhages by
the violent fits of coughing. In this manner
several pieces had previously been' removed,
and with the last Mr. Drummond's
health began to improve, and he is now, as
we have stated, apparently quite well. The (
Wound in his side has never healed entirely 1
up, and there still remains an orifice of about
half an inoh, through which the breath can ,
be inhaled or expelled. A number of the (
fragments of the broken watch have been
shown us by a friend, and are still mute witnesses
of this terrible accident.?Norfolk
Virginian, 1
The Dead Soa,
i
A NEW PICTURE?NOT SO DEAD AND DESO- 1
LATE AS IT DAS BtJEN PAINTED.
We descended the steep hills to tho wild,
sandy plain that stretches to the Dead Sea,
and are soon cantering across the burning
sand. Suddenly our guard motions us .to
stop. They profess to see robbers lurking
behind some bushes near the shore, though
we can see nothing, and believe it only a ruse
on their part to get from us somo backshish..
While they go forward to reconnoitre, we
move on slowly. Learning t?hat the coast is
clear, we gallop on and dismount on the 1
shores of a lake whose waters look as clear 1
and ripple as beautifully as do the Waters of
any other lake we have yet seen, all tcstimo- i
ny to the contrary notwithstanding. 1
Guide books speak extravagantly of death <
everywhere abounding in the waters and
along the shores. "Not a flower, not a green , j
willow nor a shrub anywhere to ho seen , its
waters are raroly ruffled by a breeze. All is ]
silence, gloom, and death." The Dead Sea,
as seen by jis bore quite a different aspect.
For miles along the shore, we rode through '
a thicket of shrubbery and willows as green '
as we ever found anywhere, and among the 1
prettiest flowers which we carry with us are
some which we plucked on the shores of the <
Dead Sea. That the waters are heavy and ,
bitter, is true, for we tested them in bathing, |
but that they are rarely ruffled, we can not
believe, as at the time of our visit there wa^
but little breeze, yet the waves splashed on (
the pebbly beach, and in the distance their j
white crests looked liko so many white
swans?Boston Traveller.
TnE "Widow's Wiles.?They tell about
a blooming young widow who used to live
next door to Mr. Smith, who was a widower
?' ? m?n urlmQA trnlrl ovps hcanied
U1JU a tlUUU UlUUj n uuuv
blandly through his speotacles. The widow 1
had a kindness for Smith, and he reciproca- ]
ted it; although he had barely sufficient cour- '
age to carry on the campaign. So at last
the widow pretcndefoo be tofriblv afraid of
thunder and lightning and whenever she
saw a gust coming up she used to smooth
her hair and rush into Smith's house.
Then, when she heard a peal of thunder,
she would scream, rush up and throw her
arms around the mild eyed Smith's neck J
and imploro hiiji to protect her. Mr. Smith
always looked embarrascd and anxious and
said he woujd. Thon she would faint, and 1
Smith would feel half glad and half sorry.? ;
About six thunder storms settled'tho busi- <
noss: and now she is Mrs. Smith. lie is i
only sorry that her.apprehensions of thun- 1
dor and lierhtninsr were not realized. lie
says that if ever there was a woman \Vho de- ,
served to bo torn to piecos by electricity, it f
is that widow. She has thunderstorms eve- 1
ry day now in Smith's house, aud it is live- ,
ly and vigorous for Smith around there (
since the widow took possession.
The Accurate Boy.?There was a young
man once in the office of a "Western railway
superintendent. He was occupying a position
that four hundred boys in the city <
would have wished to get. It was honorable
and it "paid well," besides bemg iq a
line of promotion. How didhc got it ? Not
by having a rich father, for ho was the son
or a laborer. The secret was his beautiful :
accuracy. He began as an errand boy and
did his work accurately. His leisure time ,
he used in perfecting his writing and arithmetic,
After a while he learned to telegraph.
A*. pfinli sten his employer commonded his
accuracy, and relied upon what he did, be-*
cause he was just right. And it is thus
with every occupation. The accurate boy is
the favored one, Those who employ men do
not wish to bo on the look-out, as though '
they were rogues or fools. If a carpenter
must stand at his journeyman's elbow, to be
sure that his work is done right, or if a cashier
must run over his book keeper's columns
he might as well do the work himself as to
employ another to do it that way; and it is
very certain that the employer will get rid
of such an inaccurate workman just as soou
as he cau.
!>
ADVERTISING RATES.
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Space. 1M. 2 M. 3 M. G M. 1 Y.
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2 squares 6 00 9 00 12 00 18 00 2G 00
3 squares 9 00 13 00 1G 00 24 00 35 (M
4 squares ' 12 00 16 00 20 00 80 00 43 0?
I column 15 00 19 00 24 00 34 00 50 OC
4 column 20 00 30 00 40 00 55 00 80 00
1 column 30 00 60 00 GO 00 90 00 150 06
All Transient Advertisements will be charged
One Do'lt.ae per Square for the first and Seven}
ty-pive Cents per Square for each flubsequeiiinscrtion.
ii^
JOTTINGS.
Englandjias 32,623 breweries.
Of the seventy-four United States Senators,
fifty arc lawyers.
Old Maids are fond of pairs, but cannot
bear any .reference to dates.
A North Carolina woman was buried in a
Pun?lin? K/i.1 onnnwlinnf fn lior rlmirA
IWUlU^i UVVVAUUIQ W ?V4 MVW?*W*
Out West they call a bride a "pecuniary
compliment." and say no more about it.
An Illinois newspaper has suffered from
three libel suits to the amount of 35 cents.
The sleeveless-jackets take precedence of
all other styles of out-door garments this season.
"Playing Texas on 'em" is the Alabama
vernacular for the final dispos ition of horso
thieves.
When should a dairy-man use the letter o
in place of u? AY hen he wants to make butter
better.
A popular doctor in Owego gives prescriptions
with directions to "take one teaspoon-'
ful every three years.
A rural New York father has named one
haploss child Ajax Tolamon, and another
Agamemnon Achilles.
A shrewd old lady compares her husband
to a tallow candle , he always sputters and
3mokes when he's put out.
An undertaker in Mount Yernon advertiges:
Coffins made and repaired on short notice.
*
In Manilla 25,000 women and girls work
at cicrar makincr at avoraere wastes of seven
cents per day.
Why ia a new born-babe like the relief of
Lucknow? Because it's the long expected
mcker. ^
Conceit ia said to bo a better capital to
start with in life than money. Ik it? Give
us capital.
Get your sweetheart a new set of teeth as a
Christmas present," ia the invitation of an
advertising dentist.
Chicago is not likely to have its gift library
':froni modern British authors," and no ono
will be sorry for it.
Lecturing is at a very low ebb in England, . _
Only noblemen or very distinguished parties
can draw an audieuco.
It is surmised that Dickens, as a reporter,
did his reporting on 'Change?he has {Unshed
so many stock quotations.
Some of the iron columns of the Boston*
new post-office, buildiuer are thirtv-three feet
high, and weigh over twelve thousand pounds
each.
A paper, in puffing a certain soap, says it
is the "best ever made for a dirty man's face.
Wo have tried it, and thcrcforo wo ought to
know.'
A policeman asked a drunken aothiop
whom he could scarcely see in the dim light
)f a cell, "Are you oolorod?" "Colored,
ao; dis yer chile born so."
"Is civilization a failure?" asks the chief
jrgan of the Democracy in Montano. Will
contemporaries be kind enough to answe?
tho momcnteous question ?
A Western editor, in writing tho obituary
)f a respectable citizen, says "that ho has
;onc to that undiscovered burn."
Mary had a little lamb,
She had it in the garden, '
And every time it wagged its tail,
It spoilt her Dolly Varden.
An epitaph on a North Carolina mule is
is follows:
Here lies a mule, blind as a bat,
Hie more corn you'd give lum, tho loss he'd
grow rat;
He belonged to tho bummers of old Bill
Sherman,
And mulesjikc this wc all say, durn 'em.
An exchange has found out when Adam
tvas married. Of course it was on his wcdJingEve;
most every body knew it berore.
Several people who have answered an adrertisemcnt
promising a ''correct likeness of.
yourself, and your fortnno told,, for fifty
ients, have received a three-cent mirror, and
informed that they can tell thoir own fortunes
by counting their money.
The State Superintendent of Maine eent
out this question: "Can you suggest any
amendments to the school law of theStato?" _
The School Committee of Mariavillo answercd:
."We recommend the establishment of
a reform school for meddlesome parents."
"Ilello, Ben!"
"Ilello. back a?ain ! What d'yo wan't?"
"IIow's ycr folks this morning?"
"Party well. Mother's smart as usual?
Jim and Tom well?an' father died- last
night."
"Your father died 1" "Yes: he kicked
the bucket 'bout 12 o'clock, and I've got
his watch! Say, just going up to prison to
see cousin Joe hung, will ye go?"
There is a Methodist church which stands
on the boundary line between Ohio and
Pennsylvania, in such a way that the pnlpit
is in the former State and the pews in tho
latter. A Pennsylvania paper thereupon
takes occasion to state that whilo the hearers
are in one State their preacher is in another
State discoursing 011 the future State.
A Detroit black bear got looso the other
day, and cautiously approaching a man leaning
against a hitching post, rose up andgavo
him a hug. Thinking it to be a man, ho
cried out: "What arc you doing there?
Get off my back, or I'll knock you into tho
middle of nest week!', lie was greatly
"moved" when he found out who the man
was. ami stood not upon the ordor of his going.
1