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f . THE TRIBUNE. i r H $ ; . iNfjryOL. I.--NO. 51. BEAUFORT. S. NOVEMBER 10, 1875. $1.50 PER ANNUM. i'iiiUlh; ? Our Baby. i Our baby's a wonderful child, Tin sure; Do you know what she did to-day? j Why, when mother put her down on the floor, | Bhe crawled right out at the open door, X As if she was going away! 1 t Our baby?she's only eight months old? i But if I take great oare, c She's given me in my arms to hold ; f She has five teeth, and like skeins of gold t Axe her tiny locks of hair. Our baby is so vory dear to us, We pet her all day long, ' Till old nurse says, " Dear me what a fuss? ^ There'll be nothing left if you kiss her thus !" ^ But I am quite sure nurse is wrong. e Our baby?I know you would love her too, G She has such a winning way ; 1 For first she seems with her eyes of blue To be looking at you quite through and ^ through, j Anil f.lxon -1 ?* " .uuu uuu mil OU111U M1U Ul?y. a Our baby?I wonder much if bIio knows ii She id to us all so dear V v Now can she think, do yon suppose?? n See liow delighted she laughs and orows h When mother or nnrse is near. " s a A PRISON ON THE MOUNTAIN. A e The Mont Remarkable of all Pea a I Inntltn- ? 11 nitii ? A Novel Indaatry akd Ho Beaeflelal ? ROToetn?The Terrible Dark Cells?la- d Itennlty of the 1'rlaoaers. o! Among the mountains in the extreme M northwestern corner of the State of New 0 York is located Clinton prison, the smallest of the three penal institutions b under State control, but in some respects ? much the most interesting to the ob- u servant visitor. It is by no means easy ^ to get to Donnemara, the little town or b hamlet which has sprung up around the b prison gate. By divers ways of cars 61 and boats, through many delays, an- ? noynnces ana vexations, one gets to Piattabnrg. Thenoe one mnst dnve six- " teen miles to reach Donnemara. This el comparative inaccessibility is the real & reason why convicts dread Clinton prison tl more than either Auburn or Sing Sing. A They like to see their friends now and w then; to feel that they are within easy ? reach of their former homes, and not 11 that they are practically exiled. Hence the constant petitions from prisoners ftl hero to the inspectors for transfer to the 1 other prisons. But the discipline here n is not, as it has often been represented k by such petitioners, more severe than n. elsewhere. In some respects it is even more indulgent, necessarily so from the fl character of the industries in which the is men are employed, and though their m work may be harder, it is certainly better ai calculated for the development of what- ni ever manhood the men may possess than hi are such petty avocations as shoemaking d< and shirt ironing. /- ei Clinton prison is situated upon the tl side of a mountain. Before it lies a pretty oi little valley shut in on every side bv t* mountains, the rugged outlines of which ol are at this season softened by dense si ? ioiinge 01 varied lines. But in winter fr time this must be a very bleak and tl ohoerless prospect. Ten thousand acres m of land in the immediate vicinity are the property of the State. Twenty-five a acres are inclosed for prison purposes fr by a stockade of heavy planks twenty hi feet in height, and upon this wall, at ki ten points, are posted look-out stations, b< where guards sit all day long with^re- <x peating Winchester rifles in their hands, lc revolvers in their belts, and loaded mus- sj kets by their sides, to frustrate any bold T endeavors at escape. When the old log a st6ckade was standing, prisoners not in- ti frequently managed to shin up to the d< top, drop over on the outer side, and n< escape to the forest. But the smooth ti planks are much more difficult to climb, tc and few make the attempt. Besides, tl Capt. Herwerth, sergeant of the guard, tc has awakened a spirit of emulation in sc marksmanship among his men, and the si convicts naturally are shy of tempting ai toward themselves the demonstration of flj such skill as the guards frequently die- m play in. their target practioe. Even ai should a prisoner reach the woods his w chances for getting away are barely even, al But should he miss friendly aid, he will cf i. . i.\.i.i i -? *? * uo uaum iaj wuuuer auout in tne dense m forest until hunger drives him back to tl the prison, until somebody picks him up c? for the sake of the reward for his recap- tc turo, or until sheer aocident brings him en back to his point of departure. m It is related that upon one occasion, oi some months ago, a couple of oonviots, ai who secreted themselves in the big mine d< until after dark, managed to get over the ii wall and struck ont into the forest. They n; traveled hard all night, through close m thickets and over rocks, and in the gray e< light of morning found themselves just si beneath the prison wall, having strug- tl gled along in a circle on the mountain a| side through all these weary hours. In a sheer disgust they stumbled around to o< the gate and voluntarily gave themselves | upj ( } \} ' / d Tho distinctive peculiarity about this ai prison is tnat it is the only r ne in this b oountrj?-or, indeed, with a single ex- h oeption, in the world?wherein the n mining an 1 manufacturing of iron is m carried on. Within the prison walls are V now two mines, one belonging to Messrs. tl Watson k. Cq., of Plattsburg?to whom tl the State pars a royalty of one dollar tl per ton on all separated ore from it?the o< other belonging to tbe State exclusively, n The first of these has been worked with is varying.rogularity for fifteen years past, o In 1869, the owners having demanded an It increase 1f their royalty from seventy- S five cents to one. dollar per ton, which ix the prfton authorities refused to pay, si the mine was permitted to fall into dia- v use and fill up with water, so that when, s< in 1871, under a new regime, its rework- d ing was determined npon, three months' pra steady pumping were required to empty crii t sufficiently to permit of the resump- anc don of mining operations. So rapid litt ind constant is the infiltration of water, in \ lp to the present time, that an eight- q lorse power steam engine is kept at cij. vork, day and night, running the Gf lumps in this and new mines, y? t in >ne part of the old mine the flood is six wej eet in depth, and sometimes increases to [H , en. (laj To enter the old mine, one descends " p >j" a rugged and treacherous path into a pec ut some thirty feet iu depth, and not the ess than eighty feet iu diameter at the her op. In the side of this pit toward the ne\ aountain opens the mine. It seems an amy normons cavern. The sides are a hun- pad [red feet apart, the roof thirty feet in o'-n teight, and the length of this great ex- up< avation something more than fourteen emi inndred feet. Huge columns of ore and and ock are left to support the roof. The tari .ropping and plashing of water, the slow the romiloi* ?J- * .vg.uu U1 IUO 1UU? pump- UUI ng machinery, the hollow echoes of cell oiees afar in the depths, all have a tim lournful effect. The gloom of Me dis- occ ince is flecked by the little red lights of cert tie miners' lamps, flitting to and fro, fori ot seemingly larger than glowworms, pos nd as nnoertain in their illumination, the .t certain hours blasts are fired, and the nit] choes are like rapidly repeated thunder, kite r the successive discharges of a number by i f large cannon. The air is cold and not amp, bnt pure, having nothing of the and loseness pertaining to such mines as are iine rorked by shafts, drifts and galleries?a In t oal or a silver mine for instance. vict All the men working here are convicts, ut one cannot but be impressed, at *'10 ight of them and of their fellows in the tills, with the idea that such labor as oim jat in which they are here employed *rar as had a subtle effect in elevating them c"ai 1 the scale of manhood. It has hard- Pon ned their muscles, imbued them with a 8^aE Dnscionsness of masculinity, taught 80111 lent by their conflict with the snllen N lertia of nature's resistance to man's driv [Torts much more self-reliance and dev irnestuess Of honest, vigorous purpose gall lan all their previous lives had known, mos s yon -meet them, they look yon Hea luarely in the eyo, not furtively iron lancing at yon with the lurking, sneak- are )g, evil look which you will enoonnter plac k every step in the Sing^ Sing laundry quit nd among the idle villains at Aubnrn. met here can he no doubt that it improves ank ten's morals to beoome strong by honest be >il, even if that gain of strength be brei pon compulsion. littl The ore as taken from tbo mirmn in b.V 1 ret roasted in three hnge kilns, thence passed through an eighteen-stamp lill, separated by water from the rock, diai id when dry is melted in charcoal fur- ^11 ices, hammered into blooms beneath a 8^' age trip-hammer, and finally shaped as e ssired by the rolls. From sixty to coin ghty men are constantly employed in cell iese mills and reduction works in gangs hutr f that number, each of which works it reive hours and then gives place to juci ;hers. There is also a large machine that lop in another department, employing men om twenty to forty men, wherein all it. te machinery in use about the prison is g^OI ade or repaired as occasion demands. Btrei Out behind tho main mill building is jn(M huge pile of charcoal, hauled in here com om the twenty-eight kilns in which it or M is been burned in the forest. The but aepers say that on the night of Novem- Qf 0 ar 7, 1874, this enormous pile of char- him >al?or one equally large, in the same his cation?took fire accidentally from wjil larks emitted by the mill smoko stacks. fore he fire raged furiously, sweeping away flari very large portion of the stockade on ftn<j vo sides of the enclosure and burning jDg awn one of the guard posts, which was gcVe at deserted by its heroic occnpant un- por 1 it began to sink under his feet, and hnn. i hlR llfp }ia VlO/1 fn flnrinof nnfoiila _ eoaH le line. To save the prison from that p^yi >tal destruction which at one time emed imminent, one hundred and w{,i( xty convicts were let ont of their cells, ^q! id. called to assist in checking the mfty tines. The night was dark, the excite- feT6 ent great, the Keepers few in number, jftm id the barrier hitherto confining them as in groat part dostroyed, yet when 1 danger was past and the men were ^gct died to return to their cells not one was )inH issing, not one had availed himself of jjjH ie extraordinary opportunities for es- Hjc^( ipe. They were even heard conversing igother, while fighting the fire, and preH tying to each other: "Well, he'd be a jf jj( ean fellow who would take advantage [ a time like this to run away." Yet a ^ nong these oon\icts were some conumned for life?there are thirty such i the prison?and many incarcerated t^es pon long sentences. Some of the very ]OWf ten who resisted the temptations to ^ggj icape offered by that oocasion have jn? noe made desperate attempts to gain leir liberty, when all ohanoes seemed Tl rainst them, but when they had the ex- here itement of matching their cunning and fl.ve iurage against their keepers. size, The preservation of that hedious and eac^ epresaing silence which is so important <*pa a element of the discipline of the Al- Perfl any penitentiary is not even attempted <*>nc ere. To enforoe it would be almost, if twio ot quite, impossible, unless there were whoi i many keepers as there are oonvicts. The /hile the men on " tours " of labor in own, ie mill are waiting for the smelting of T1 ie ore, the serving of the hammer or are i ie rolls, or in the various mining pro- givii sesee wherein arduous toil is broken by men loments of necessary relaxation, there one i no restriction upon either conversation and r employment by the prisoners of their then tisure in small work for themselves, labo ome of the oonvicts are qnite skillful faet i the making of horse-hair jewelry and healt nail carvings, by the sale of which to here isitors they often manage to save np pita] ) me times considerable sums against the iron: ay of their discharge. As far as it is largi cticable the keepers seek to repress ninal or demoralizing reminisoenoes I communications, but comparatively le restraint can be directly exercised ;his wiv under existing conditions. ?he lightest punishment in use in nton prison is the " yoke "?a collar iron with three outwardly curved ugs reaching above tho head, and ghing some fourteen pounds?which rorn by the culprit as many hours or tj as necessity seems to demand. The addle " is sometimes omployed upon uliarly refractory fellows, and it is experience of the keepers and guards e that nltliough this punishment is er severe enough to do the prisoner serious injury, they never have to Idle the same man twice. The ? catline tails," formerly used, is still kept m exhibition, but is said to be never ployed. Of course the murderous I abominable dark cell, the " humanians' " diabolical choice of torture, is heaviest penalty for serious infracts of discipline. There are six dark <3 in fill a nrianti /vf w tutu J/* iwu, cnv ui 1TUIVJU, ttb tut? e of the writer's recent visit, were npied by men who had been inearlted there for nine days. These un;unatc wretches had been found in session of a skeleton key by which y would have been enabled, opportur occurring, to pass through the hen, and possibly thence to escape scaling the stockade. They would tell who had made the key for them, were consequently doomed to conment here until they would confess, rach coses it is the rule, when the ;im of the cell is once more able to k and work?he having succumbed to fearful pressure upon both mind and y, and been let out in time to save i from actual death in the oell?to amel him with a heavy ball and in, weighing twenty or twenty-five nds, which is thenceforth his conit companion by both day and night, etimes for many months, ot unfrequently this added infliction res prisoners to the most ingenious ices for freeing themselves from the ing burden and to attempting the it desperate measures for escape, ivy rivets fasten the strong bands of i about their ankles, but these they cunning enough to saw out and reie by others of lead, which may be :kly cut through at an opportune moit, and sometimes they even saw the lets so deeply that they may easily broken, the cut being filled up with id crumbs covered with rust. Not a e ingenuity is occasionally displayed he convicts in making for themselves, a their blankets, coarse suits of hing resembling those of the Canai woodchoppers in the neighborhood, such suspicious manifestations of I are, howevor, punished severelv. very intelligent officer in the prison aides in the opinion thnt the dark is, of all punishments, the most iniau and permanently injurious, while at the same time the one least con,ve to moral reformation. They say it ruins the physical and blights the tal condition of those subjected to A term in the dark cell, long or t, according to the individual ngth of the victim, inevitably re58 him to such a weak and abject lition that from sheer lack of strength ill to combat he finally succumbs, his submission has behind it nothing aoral oonviction. It has come upon like a disease, and when he regains normal vigor, if he ever does, he be at least as bad as he ever was l?eWhen a man is confined in the i cell he is allowed but a gill of water two ounces of bread per diem, nothelse. This is not in itself quite so re a punishment as it would seem, the first two days he will suffer with ger and thirst. Then his bowels e to act. He becomes almost torpid, sically, and is in a great degree nnicious of the process of starvation sh is going on. He may endure ly from thirst, for mental conditions supervene to bring on an intense r, but he is no longer hungry. The p, penetrating oold of his stone n chills the very marrow in his 3fl. His whole frame aches from conwith the unyielding stones, for he no other bed or seat than the floor, lungs are poisoned and his stomach ened by the foul air. Worst of all adure are the deathly silence and opsive darkness. To him it seems as | b were alone in a world immersed in | rmi nignr, ana oiten superstition or ) vivid imagination peoples thickly i phantom terrors the impenetrable m.* Again and again prisoners in e hideona dungeons, upon being al>d onoe more to come forth, liave 1 seen to fall on their knees, weepvrith joy at sight of the light. ao ordinary prison arrangements 1 i are all good enough. There are hundred and forty-eight cells of fair big enough to hold two men in t if necessary. There is a chapel ble of ac? mrtodating rx hnndred ons, where onoe a month a priest lucts Roman Catholic services, and e a month a Protestant chaplain, , Be name I have mislaid, holds forth, convicts have a fair choir of their j le kitchen is good and the prisoners veil fed. The prison is estimated as ig, directly and indirectly, employ- 1 t and maintenance to not less than ' thousand persons outside the walls, i it is very doubtfnl if one-tenth of 1 1 live half so well by their honest < r as the convicts do inside. One < indicative of the good fare and < thfnl surroundings of the oonvicts 1 is that the average number in hos- i 1 is only ten out of a population of | l 238 to 640, and of those ten, a ' s proportion are merely temporarily | disabled by accidents in the mines or mill. Summing up the results of our observations of this prison, it appears that the convict who honestly endeavors to oonform to the requirements of a very lenient discipline and is not too far cursed with inherient laziness to do manly work, may live here at least as well as at either Sing Sing or Auburn, and is likely to derive much greater benefit than at either of those places in permaTlAtlf. nlivniool on/1 ?~-v nun mviai iui|/&UTCUluilbf so far as that may be affected by his avocations. By comparison with the Albany penitentiary this is a oontiuval Christmas for the prisoner. The one grand defect remains, however, that its system affords almost unlimited facilities for the criminal education of the young by older and hardened convicts, who choose to avail themselves of the opportunities afforded to spread tkeir owu utter demoralization among those surrounding them. This evil seems inseparable from the unclassified congregate system, except where the merciless rigor of the Albany penitentiary discipline is in vogue, and nftords the most powerful argument in favor of the introduction here of the Croftou system. Should an experiment in this direction be deemed advisable, it is easy to see in what way our three great State prisons might readily be made available, with little other cliange than in their respective organizations of discipline, and until this, or something nearly akin to it, is done, it is useless to talk of or hope for the reformation of our congregate prisons from their present character, that of mere colleges of crime, or to dream of any beneficial effect, through their agency alone, in the reduction of our average of criminality.?New York Sun. A Story of Tom Corwln. It was well known of the wagoner's boy," as Tom Corwin was familiarly called, that he was, during his speeches, very obliging and willing to answer all questions propounded him during his speeches, provided they were asked at the proper time; but there were always rrinnr rii/lo mnn toUa nrom nannlKt * uuvy UAV/U nuv noio UOUIU1J pcncut when lie spoke who differed from him in their views, and they would often make it a point to be impudent. One of these fellows happened to be present with his friends on one occasion and during Mr. Corwin's address, when he was in the middle of the sentence, called out: "I say, Corwin, what do you think of your party, take it as a whole?" "Tom" made no reply? when the man repeated it. Mr. Corwin stopped in his speech, and we shall never forget the seriousness of that couutenance?peoplfc laughed before he had said a word?then drawing himself up to his full stature, he roared out: "Did any one hear an ?*? bray?" and then relaxing his sternness with a sort of a jerk, ho drew down his mouth and let go that smile of his, aud such a roar of laughter that followed from his auditors we have never since heard?but it did not stop hero, at least every ten mintues throughout the next two hours he would ask the same question: '' Did any one hear an ass bray i" pointing a moral each time with the expression or drawing a comparison in some way. The laugh and the attention of all turned upon the questioner, and before he was through with his address we saw the fellow and his friends nniflllv ?n?ab away, amid the jeers of the people. Too Severe Stiuly. It has been pretty accurately ascertained that girls are not as a role so able, constitutionally, to bear study as boys are, and that the efleets of severe study will in most instances be detrimental. This has been found to be the case in America more than in England. Not long ago there was brought beforo the commissioners of insanity in San Francisco a young girl whose mind was diseased to an extent that rendered her committal to the ayslnm inevitable. The reason assigned was the evil above alluded to. The girl had been devoted to her studies. She had endured the "cramming" process until her mind gave way, and although, according to the school reports, " highly distinguished in her classes," she is to-day a helpless lunatic from the effects of this unnatural and wretched method of subjecting youthfnl minds to a torture which must inevitably result in severe mental impairment. It is every year becoming mnrA ATulanf. fVi(if if tlia nl.l things is to be revolutionized, it will not answer to do so without taking great pains to find out what are the nature and Limits of the education whioh the mind of an average girl will bear without injury to mental and bodily health. The Freneh Vintage. It is needless to say, says a Paris correspondent, that the wine crop is the most important of all in France, its value largely exceeding that of all kinds of grain. In ordinary years it is estimated at considerably over two milliards of francs. For twenty years its exportation*, alone has had a mean value of tw6 hundred and fifty millions of francs, and in 1878 Franoe sold three hundred millions' worth of her wines. In addition to this there is sixty millions' worth of brandy. The vintage contributes three hundred and fifty odd millions to the budget of tho State, besides paying large snms in octroi taxes to the towns in which it is oonsumed. From these estimates one Ma readily comprehend the general interest taken in the annual vintage, for a superior wine crop means national prosperity. When the vintage is poor, the whole country is pinched ; when it is good the entire nation feels at ease. NOT ON THE BILLS. Paarhlag a Hat aid I la Dcladcd Owier-iA Jolly Old Oaallraiu'i Jollity Taraed to Aagrr. Who that has ever witnessed Herrmann's tricks will fail to imagine the effect of the following scene on a San Francisco audience: At a theater in San Francisco was enacted an inspiriting comedy whioh was not down on the programme, but whioh enlivened the audienoe in a most wonderful manner. Herrmann, the magician, appears, and performs his dexterous tricks for the edification of the audience. One of his most amusing ventures is the demolition of a "plug hat, borrowed from some good-natured spectator, and its subsequent wonderful restoration to its owner. There was a jolly-looking old man seated near the staxre with a new silk hat, which he very readily loaned to the professor. When Herrmann explored the inside of the hat and brought forth an egg, the jolly old fellow laughed quite heartily, and when the facetious magician again explored the prolific interior of the hat and brought forth in some mysterious manner two rabbits, the jolly old fellow grew quite hysterical, and his faoe became of a livid huo. Herrmann handed the hat to his female assistant, with instructions to brush it for the gentleman. The assistant retired with the borrowed hat, and exchanged it for an old one, with whiclf the trick was to be concluded. Iu the meanwhile Herrmann was engaged in performing some other impossible feat, after which he espied the hat on the little table. He directed his malo assistant to return the hat to the jolly old gentleman. The assistant, on his way to the gentleman's sent, stumbled, and, to the dismay of the professor, audienoe, and particularly the jolly old gentleman, who was perfectly aghast, fell on the hat and crushed it into a shapeless block lump. The unfortunate assistant sheepishly returned the disordered tile to his master and retired iu a most disconsolate manner. The professor apologised very humbly for the accident to the owner, . whose jollity had seriously departed, and who looked quite savage, and promised to do all in his power to restore the hat. To cheer the spectators he executed a trifling diversion with a handkerchief. He rolled it into a small ball and pretended to throw it to the owner iu the gallery, but it mysteriously disappeared. The magician assumed a look of surprise, and approaching the owner of the luckless hat, who had not abated his ferocity a jot, said: "You have that handkerchief, sir." The man surlily denied the charge, whereupon the professor applied his capacious hand to the man's nose and slowly unfolded to view the handkerchief. The spectators roared, but the man, whose forbearance'had been sufficiently tried, he thought, raised his cane and dealt the astonished Herrmann four or live heavy blows about the shoulders. The theater resounded with cries of " Pnt him out," "Bounce him," and "Biff him once for luck, Perfesa," and there was much excitement for a time. Herrmann took the matter very coolly, however, and regaining the stago took tne battered tile and saying: " I'll give you your hat, sir," began tearing it into strips. He rolled the pieces into a package, and approaching the man, remarked: "Here's your hat, sir; very much obliged, sir. ' The man indignantly refused the bundle, and Herrmnnn transferred it to the hands of an assistant, whom he directed to hold it ; above his head. He then discharged a ; pistol at it and a hat was perceived flying across the upper part of the theater. The bundle turned out to contain an apoplectic doll, and another shot discharged toward the dies brought down i the gentleman's hat unhurt and shining. ] The professor paused a moment before he returned the hat, and in a loud voice said: " If you stay hero for two minutes i after I give yon your hat, I'll put yon out, sir." The man received his hat, 1 but settled back in his seat with the evident design of remaining. The profes- , sor leaned over and clntched the portly man by the coat, and there was an am- > 1 j ?? ujuvcu nn nggic, niuvu wim Willi VUIIOtl ivy encouraging remarks from the " gods \ in the gallery, such as "Sock it to the i old duffer, Herrmann," " Give him one < for me," etc. A police officer connected j with the theater interfered, and led the < unfortunate man out. On his way out some person punched him in the neok, and immediately he was surrounded by a crowd of fifteen or twenty of the audi- j enee, who pummelled him in a most uu- | merciful manner. After a struggle, he ? succeeded in regaining the street, and ] the scenes were related and laughed over- \ by groups in front of the theater until a < late hour. An Old-Time Joke. t When about seventeen, the poet Campbell, together with a couple of i friends, played a joke upon a couple of t tradesmen in the Trongate of Glasgow. 3 A respectable apothecary named Fife r nau a placard in nis window, printed in large letters: " Ears pierced by A. Fife," meaning the operation to which 1 yonng ladies submit for the sake of c wearing earrings. Fife's next-door neighbor was a spirit dealer, named Drum, and these two shopkeepers were, 1 for some oause or other, on bad terms, t Tom and his friends strnck on an expedient for reconciling them. They procurred a long deal board, and painted on f it, in flaming capitals, this incription I fiom "Othello": " The spint-stirring ? Drum?the ear-piercing Fife." This i they nailed one night over the oontigu- 1 ous doors, to the great annoyance to Dram and Fife, ana the great amuse- i ment of every one else in Glasgow. * ? . .11 Items of Interest. A Braahenr editor offers a reward of $0 for the beat treatise on " How to Make Oat-door Life Attractive for the Mosquito." A popular writer, speaking of the ocean telegraph, wonders whether the news transmitted throngh the salt water will be fresh. A retired schoolmaster excuses his passion for angling by saving that, from constant habit, he never feels quite himself unless he's handling the rod. A new hotel elevator has been invented by a Boston man, which obviates the neoessity of steam and insures 'absolute safety. It is run by being wound up liko a clock. " My articles do not reoeive a very warm reception of late." " Our fair correspondent is mistaken," replied the editor ; " they meet with the warmest, reception possible. We burn them alL" " How are ye, Smith ?" says Jones. Smith pretended not to know him, and answered hesitatingly : " Sir, you have the advantage of me." "Yes, I suppose so. Everybody has that's got common sense." A faoctious boy asked one of his playmates why a hardware dealer was like a bootmaker t The latter, somewhat puzzled, gave it up. " Why," said the other, "because the one sold the^nails, and the other nailed the soles. A recent " cloud burst "in the Dale creek region of Arizona completely ruined a wagon road for a distance of mnea, so tnat it is scarcely passable even by parties ou* foot, owing to the deep gullies and enormous bowlders. Well, ma cheric, my eighty-six years have taught me this, that duty most be the rule and affection the sweetener of oar lives. There is a retributive justice in this world?we got what we give?if we make to suffer, we shall be made to suffer. The one who loves most is happiest. Mr. Hermann, the magician, has been assaulted in San Francisod for pretending to extract a cabbage from, .the end of an old gentleman's nose. The assaulter Wnn the old gentleman, who appears to have been provoked in the first place by Mr. Hermann's pretended dsmonshment of his hat. The latest smugglers' trick at San Francisco was the introduction of twenty-five boxes of limes, the interior filled with Havana dgera and fine playing cards. Among recent seizures were eighty-five boxes invoioed as oil, but containing #25,000 worth of opium, and a quantity of ale barrels containing #6,950 worth. Theodore Bodine, aged thirty, was assisting in thrashing m Janius, N. Y. He was stooping, in the act of cleaning the floor, when a coil of wire fell from ovMrneau. une ena 01 it oang&t about lii? neck and the other end in the machine, and he was drawn headlong into the jaws of the thrasher, mangling his head fearfully, and resulting in his instant death. " Why, Bill, what's the matter with you 1 von look down in the month." " Well, Pete, I guess if you'd been through what I have, you'd look bad too." " What's the matter f" ?? Well, yon know Sarah Snivels, don't you, Pete?" " Yee." " I discarded her last night." "You did 1 What for?" "Well, I'll tell you : she said she wouldn't marry me, and I'd discard any girl that wonld treat me in that way." To Oblige a Friend. Mr. Keyser dropped in at Statesbury's store the other day, and after some preliminary conversation he said: " Jim. are you fond of apples?" "Well, yes, if they are good," responded Stateebury. " Well, Jim, how are you on climbing s fenoe, a fence about eight feet high ? Bow are you on climbing it all of a sndlen ?" " I dunno. I might get over one if I sras excited about some thine." "Yes. And, Jim, yon ain't mnoh if raid of dogs, are yon ? Yon don't ikeer mnoh when yon see a dog kinder Doming at yon, savage like t How would it strike yon now if each a dog as that was to grab yon by the leg I" " Why, 1 wouldn't let it, of oonrse." "Well, Jim, I oome around to ask yon a favor, as a friend. Jim, I've just bought a new dog, a sorter bull-terrier, uid the man said that he'd fly at almost inybody, and hold on until he was dead. Now, I have an idea the feller was lying <o me, and I thought maybe if you'd some around and help me give that dog ?well, give him a kinder trial trip, I night find ont about him." " What do yon mean by a trial rip ?" "Why, I thought I'd see if you vuutuu t gu uibu iuj KMruon turn provcuu 0 steal apples, and I d sick this dog on ron, and then we'd see if that man miaepresented the facts to me." " Certainly I won't." " Oh, ooige on, now?just to try him! fan may have all the apples yon can arryoff with yon." "Why, you most be arssy." "Won't go? Not to oblige a friend? fot to asoertain the value of what may >e a splsndid fighting dog ?" "Orooursel won't." " Oh, Tery well, then, don't; but the 1 rat time I see yon anywhere near my >laoe I'll try him on yon, anyway. I lon't mind a man being disobliging, but rhen he's ornaiy mean the way yon are, is disgusts me. MrTkcyaer is still looking-for aperlon ttar his pet to expefinjtnt od.?Max 4 defer.