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Often fr:pu>ed hy Newspapers, They Cuti h old ' Constant lituder" Again and Again. "Notwithstanding the fact that we are generally credited with being a uewspaper reading nation, I am often , tempted to believe that there must he many millions of intelligent persons in the United States who never so much as glance at the headlines of a newspaper," remarked an officer of the postoffioo department. "At any rate, if these millions to whom I refer ever actually do read the newspapers, their gullibility must he so profound as to bo unfathomable. Thc postollicc department is constantly issuing fraud orders against individuals and alleged firms engaged in getting rich in the operation of schemes that it would seem any shrewd child of 10 ought to bc able to eeo through without the least bother. "The other day, for example, the department got after a chap out in Cincinnati who for home mouths had been conducting what he called a 'turf bureau', lie alleged in his really ad mirably written circulars that he bad private and absolutely certain meth ods of obtaining informa?ion as to thc horses that were slated to win races on tracks allover thc United States, and he guaranteed returns in tremen dous proportious. Well, wheu we looked this fellow up, he promptly skipped, and his incoming mail was seized. It sccniB incredible, but every day's mail brought io thousands of dollars, in amounts ranging from $5 actually up to $500, and thc letters in closing cash and checks were nearly all of them apparently written by per sons of education. The book in which the man kept his simple account of cash received showed that since ho put his scheme into operation ho had taken in no less a sum than $105,000, almost out of the question as it may appear. He has got away, but, even If he is captured, I very much doubt if any very heavy punishment can be visited upon him. These (dippery chaps who work their dodges by means of the maila have thc money to employ first rate lawyers, and those lawyers can generally successfully construe their clients' circulars as not having really promised anything to the gulls after all. "The cudless chains 6chernes that thc dcpaitment runs down year after year aro all of them money makers for their operators. It would actually seem as if all a 'busted' individual had to do to get rich is to get a lot of circu lars printed and send them out, bor rowin the money for postage, and thcro will alwayB bo enough gulls to start him on his way. The cherry tree soheme worked by a gang of Southern men, ono of them a clergy man, was a colossal success for its promoters, and yet not a man in tho crowd had a coin to bless himself with when they started tho endless chain scheme in motion. Tho more recent fountain pen fraud, worked by a couple of Pennsylvanians, yielded returns that went into tho thousands every day, and I haven't a doubt in life that any number of similar end less chain schemes aro being worked Proverbs ' When the butter won't come put a penny in the churn," is an old time dairy proverb. It often seems to work though no one has ever told why. When mothers are worried because the children do not gain strength and flesh we cay give them Scott's Emul sion. It is like the penny in the milk because it works and because there is something astonishing about it. Scott's Emulsion is simply a milk of pure cod liver oil with some hypophosphites especia1 ly prepared for delicate stomachs. Children take to it naturally j because they like the taste and the remedy takes just as naturally to the children be cause it is so perfectly adapted to their wants. For all weak and pale and thin children Scott's Emulsion is the most satisfactory treat ment. We will send you the penny, /. e., a sample free. He sure that thts plctore tn the form ot a label is on the wrapper of every boula o? Emulsion you buy. SCOTT & BOWNE, Chemists, 409 Pearl St., N. Y. Soc. and f i.eo ; all druggist*. t'iis ver) day thai wv. .-hill have lu to :.t I vv later on. " i lt?? people who bite ".i these cud . less chain schemed all obviously want a whole lot for nothing, or little or nothing, and this, combined with their strange simplicity, is at thc bottom of the success of the fellows who attempt to make their fortuuc through the use of the uHls. "Voa would naturally suppose that persons sufficiently intelligent to pos sess au interest in stock speculation would bc able to steer clear of 'invest ment agents' whom they only know of through circulars, would you not? And yet the department is constantly in receipt of tales of woe from indivi duals who have invested sizable sums of money with New York and Chicago swindlers claiming to conduct specula tive businesses, who operate entirely through the mails. These outfits are broken up by the United States post office authorities as soon as their fraudulent character is clearly estab lished, but it seems impossible to drive these fellows who run these al leged investment agencies wholly out of business. "Tho game's so easy for them, and they are fully aware of thc great diffi culty found convicting them. As soon as one 'brokerage' firm that car ries on its business entirely by ?nail is smashed, thc men who hav.c been suc cessfully conducting it simply move down to another block and open up another firm name. Thc shift onlv involves their getting out another batch of literature. The thousand? and thousands of dollars which these sharpers take in year io and year oui from people whose way of expressing themselves on paper makes it paten! that they are educated mon and wo men, is a perpetual source of astonish ment to me. "Thc smaller fry of the mail swind lers are the fellows who advertise that they will t-end solid gold watches, anc all that sort of things upon receipt o' one dollar. Now, doesn't it seem rea sonable to imagine that any man o woman sane enough KO run loose in i civilized community ought to knov perfectly well that a solid gold watch or whatever other article* it may bi perhaps a'genuine diamond ring,' can not be bought for the sum of oue dol lar? And yet there arc responses ti these ads. reaching literally into th' .millions and the promoters of thea dodges nearly always get rich. Las year wc routed out a fellow in Iiostoi who advertised in a very ?labor?t and splurgy fashion throughout th country that ho had got hold of a lo of lucky stones, on his travels througl India, which he was willing to purvc. by mail upon tho receipt of a dolla per stone. The money that chap go was something fabulous. Thc dollar were just raining in when the inspec tors swooped down on his office an cleaned him out. Ho didn't caro the whether he was cleaned out or not Ile had got tho money. "Something over a yoar ago the di partment nailed a clover woman wh was operating her little dodge down i Florida-a woman of tremondou shrewdness this one was, sure enougt She advertised and sont out oirculai to tho effect that shu was a natura born healer of any old disease tht was ever included in a medicino bool mental or physical, and set forth th fact that, if anything, she was som better as an 'absent healer' than ali was as a contact healer. All the pe sou afflicted with any sort of discasi had to do was to hike a five-dollar not along to her and she would spend th minutes at a certain hour of the da or night thinking of the perron nutting the money. Thus the afili?te one would be made whole. If I r member oorrcctly, this little wotha pulled in something like#200,000 wit her Boheme, and if she had really d voted five minutes of thought eac day to each of her subscribers the du would have had to be about tv months long. Tho beauty of the sin at ion in her case was that absolute! nothing could be dono in the way < punishment to her. She clung to when nailed that she really was an al Si'nt healer all right-although tho was a merry twinkle in her eye as si said it-and tho government hadn any way of proving that she wasn what she claimed to bc, even had tl government been disposed to esta lish any such contention. "Not in recent years have any these mail swindlers been so bold ; that humorist who, advertising that! would send a certain way of gettii rich on receipt of a dollar, sent o little slips containing the word 'Work like the devil and nove?* spei a cent,' but manipulators of the mai almost as brazen are constantly r quiring suppression. When one sto to roflect upon how many yoara th sort of mail swindling has been gob on, and then considers how many te of millions of newspapers containii accounts of such swindlers aro co stantly being thrown off of Americ presses, one is tempted to tako sto in that old aphorism of Hungry Joe that 'there's a sucker born cvory mi ute and they never dio.' "-Washit ion Evening Star. - A widow ?aas nothing but woi of prai.-c for her lato husband but ii different with a sleepy wife. HIS MEMORY WAS GOOD. He Knew When and How Columbus Cams Ashore at Nac3au. Down in Nassau, Now Providence, that quaint town which favored Am?ricain) visit in thc winter months, there stands a statue of Co lumbus. It isn't much of a statue, being after the swashbuckler order of architecture, but anyway it serves to remind visitors to the Bahamas that ita original first landed on an island in that chain. Being tho only statue of account in thc island, it is known of all men and is of special importance in tho eyes of the ne groes, who point to it with pride and date occurrences relatively re cent from the time of its erection. The knowledge of historical events displayed by the "mun and brother" is pretty accurately indicated in the tale they tell in Nassau respecting the occasion, a few yours ugo, that Columbus appeared in court. The lawyer for the defense, attempting tn impeach the veracity of plaintiff's witness, an old colored man o? doubtful antecedents, asked: "So you say you've lived ] ore niunv wars?'' "Vis, boss, I hos." "Then I suppose you rem?mbor clearly when Columbus landed here?" "Oh, vis, boss, I does 'member dat 's thickly." "Oh, you do?" "Vis, sub; Buttcnly, boss." "That will do, your honor. This witness' memory is evidently defec tive, and I claim a verdict for my client." The judge seemed inclined that way, too, when the plaintiff's law yer interposed: "Wait a moment, gentlemen. Perhaps my witness is not so far wrong after all. Now, Cuffie, tell us when was it you saw Columbus land and how did no come ashore ?" "Well, boss, I fink 'twas *bout twenty vear ago, an' C'lumbus ho come asho' in do big boxes !"-New York Times. Kill or Cure. In a Cornish fishing village a miserly old fellow's wife fell ill, and bc called in a doctor. "I nm willing," ho said, "to pay you liberally for your sorvices. Do what you can for my poor wife. Here is ?5 ready for you, kill or cure." The woman died, and the doctor asked for his money. "Doctor," said the bereaved one, "did you kill :ny wife?" "Croat Scott! No. I did all I could to save her." "Did you cure her?" demanded the husband. "No; she died in spite of all ray skill." "Then," said thc miser, "I don't see what you arc bothering me about. Our contract was ?5, kill or cure, and on your own admission you have done neither."-London Standard._ The Coonskin Coat. Ontario is being depopulated by the annual procession of gontlemen from the west in coonskin coats. Every old friend is ablo to make a near guess at tho cash value of tho clothes which the western pioneer carried away from the Ontario vil lage which he still calls home. The public spectacle of tho coon skin coat and tho public recollection of the cast off clothing in which the returned prodigal started away from Ontario combino in an eloquent tes timonial to the prosperity giving qualities of life in tho we9t. The coonskin coat is tho ormamb of tho western movement. The vis itor from the west in his garb of prosperity stirs tho soul of Ontario's nome staying youth with a wild am bition to go west and grow up into thc grandeur of similar garments. Toronto Telegram. To Stand an Eg- on End. Wo believe that others cracked eggs before Columbus, as they have sinco, and stood them on ond, too, but as there is another way of bal ancing an egg without resorting to such unfair means we submit this explanation as probably tho true one of Columbus' feat. If a freshly laid hen's egg be violently shaken so as to thoroughly mix tho yolk and white and also to fracture the air sack and allow thc contained air to rise, it is simply a question of manual dexterity, within the reach of all, to balance an egg with out c rucking it on a perfectly smooth surface. Information. "There is something in this pa per," said Mrs. Chugwater, "about a 'real estate pool' and a 'railway I pool.' What docs that mean ? What are they ?" "They are merely organizations of business men," replied Mr. Chug- j water. "Then why do they call them pools?" "That's on account of *he water in their stocks, I suppose. Women can't understand these things. Don't bother me."-Chicago Tribune. - Tho Government coined during tho last fiscal year 79,611,143 pennies and 20/130,213 ninkcl five-cents piceos. Of tho pennies Pennsylvania got 4, 000,000, New York, 10,000,000, Massa chusetts, 5,000,000. So many pennies aro lost that it is necessary to make from 60,000,000 te 00,000,000 of them every year. ^ - The greatest trouble with tho av erage reformer is that ho begins work too far away from home. HIa Manner Cured One Man'c Taste For a Seafaring Life. One day. perceiving a man-of-war i in port, and a fine looking officer on the quarter deck walking to and fro ! under an awning, I ventured on I j board und accosted him with all due I 1 respect, ns 1 thought then and as I ? j still believe. I have quite forgotten j I whut I was starting to say, but I re- j j member well thc curt command j that cut me short-"Take off your j hut when you address a gentleman !" j uttered without discontinuing his walk or turning his face, which he I carried ptraight before him. If he had '?urled a binnacle at mc or a bow anchor or anything else nnvni und characteristic, I couldn't have been more astounded. As he | wore Iiis own cap (handsomely gold j laced, as I seo him in'my mind's eye ; still) and we were in the open air ! but for tho awning, I couldn't possi ? bly see how I lind merited so brutal , a rebuff. I stared nt him a ino i ment, stilling with astonishment and ; j humiliation and indignant enough j I to hurl back at him anything in his 1 ! own line, a capstan or a-forecastle, j ' I was too angry to make a discrim i inating choice. Fortunately I had \ sense enough left to reflect that ho i MUS in his own little kingdom and ? that if I wasn't pleased with the 1 ; manners and customs of thc country | ? thc sooner I took myself out of it the better. I turned my back on lum abruptly and left the ship, choking down my wrath, but think ing intently-too late, as was my habit-of the killingly sarcastic re tort I might have made. Thus was- quenched in me the last flickering ember of inclination for a seafaring life,-J. T. Trowbridge in Atlantic. _ Knew the Man. An assistant at thc New York Lnw library Meat to the librarian ono time in a state of great agita tion. "There's a stout old man sitting ia an alcove almost out of sight, und ho acts as if he owned the whole library, and he wants me to bring him about half the books there are in the building, and ? think he;s crazy." Thc librarian thought a moment and thou asked: "Big, fat man?" "Yes." "Bald?" "Yet." "Coat bunched up in the back an trousers bagged at the knees?" "Yc-e-cs." "Drawls?" "Yup." "Well, you'just get. a hustle on yoi?, young man, and bring him ev ery book ho wants if ho asks for the whole library. That man's Tom Heed."_ A Delicate Point In Golf. A golf fiend writes to our query editor us follows: "I was playing golf against a friend thc other day and after a magnificent drive was astounded to see a cow swallow my ball. However, I succeeded in driv ing the cow on to the gre'en and with many whacks made her disgorge my ball close to the hole. I then holed out with the next stroke and claim ed the hole, as I had done it in two ?trokes, a drive and a putt? *No/ said my friend; 'you took fifteen.' 'How do you make that out?* -I asked. 'Why/ said he, *you hit the cow with your cleek thirteen times, which, with your drive and putt, makes fifteen. " I have been won dering if any one has had experi ences somewhat similar to above. New York Press. Awkwardly Expressed. She was a large woman and not what you would call handsome, but then she was an heiress. Still the designing }'outh might have been more diplomatic. "Miss Tubbs," ho said when he thought it was about time to bring matters to a head-"Sarah, for months past my thoughts and as pirations have boen centered on one great object" She smiled encouragingly. "Miss Tubbs-Sarah, need I say it? You are that great object I" "Sir!" And n few moments later tho would be suitor crept dejectedly from the house. - -\ wr?(jinfi j- H*> vnuiin nt* ml.er Brimin think *h>- b??ks The Great Spi After the rigor? of winter are felt tonio, laxative and BLOOD Pl YOU WANT THE BEST i RHEUM This medicine ia scientifically com herbs and barks, combined with cen products. A sure cure for Rheumatic: Kidney Troubles, and all diseases arish Aalt your druggist* Star RH RU M A Hewar? of Substitute* All Druggists, ot Bobbitt Chemical Co., FOR SALE BY EV J liiCatoWII Exposition. The Jamestown Expositiou will have historic interest unequalled by any previous affair of (ho kind in this country. Jamestown was the first per manent English settlement in the New World. Ilad it failed, like many others that were attempted, we might have been set back a century. From the small beginning we have grown in the space of three centuries to be the foremost Government on earth. Twen ty million people live within ? night's ride of the spot. The Company char tered to prepare for the celebration has bought land at Sewell's Point, where took place the first offensive I operation against the Confederates in the civil war. A masked battery of three rifled oann.:o, supported by 2, 000 Confederates, held the point on the morning of May 21, 1861, when the Freeborn, Capt. Wood, opened her guns. It was soon silenced and tho Confederates driven away.-New York Press. Willing to Divide. A Hartford lawyer tells of a client in one of the adjourning towns who had a farm to sell. He had recently sunk a well on it, and thc job costa pun), consequently when he talked of disposing of his property tho well caused him considerable anxiety. "How much do you ask for the farm?" thc lawyer asked. "Waal, I'll tell yer," drawled the farmer. "I'll sell the place for $700 with the well, and I'll let it go for $600 without the well." - Most men take slight applause for an encore. - The darker tho room the more furniture a man's shin can discover in it. - When a man gets out to buy grat itude by lending money he acquires an assessable interest in a worthless liability. - Tho meanest trick tho weather can olav on a wnmnn iu to g?t ?p a sudden wind storm wheu &ho isn't dressed for it. - A woman can Bpend more limo getting tho c-mbroidory around tho cor uer of a doyley than a mancaD on pro moting a railway. - A fool sometimes profits by his own experience, but the wise guy al ways profits by the dearly bought ex perience of others. - It is the man who leaves his wife every morning in a wrapper and curl papers that can't believe his eyes when hu meets her in the street. - Many a man works over time in trying to convince himself that he is honest. - Give advice to others if you will, but take an occasional dose of it your self. - The editor of a weekly newspa per in Australia offers himself as a prize to the woman who writes the best essay on the duties of a wife. - It is not the loudest churoh bell that brings the most money to the collection box. - In tho last 16 months the rail ways of Great Britain, although the most crowded in the world, have not caused a singlo death. In that time more than 1,200 persons have been killed by the railways of the United States as shown by the accident bul letins of the interstate commerce com mission. - Recently a negro killed a white man in Indiana, Pa., and escaped. The DLb.oefl wero ordered to leave and failing to comply with the request the white residents yesterday attaoked the negroes shtoks and pulled them down. The negroes then departed. - Many a man's financial embarrass ment may be attributed to the fact that he spent a lot of money in trying to get something for nothing. - A caterpillar cannot see more than a centimeter ahead; that is to say, less thau two-fifths of an inoh. The hair ou tho body is said to be of aa muoh use ?is its eyes in letting it know what is goiug on and around. - You have doubtless observed that the average mau puts in so muoh time preaching he hat) but little time for practice. A -mg Remedy. you are liable to feel the need of a. JR.IFIER. OF COURSE; THAT 18 ACIDE? pounded from the extracta of roots, tain other purifying and alterative m, Indigestion, Constipation, Boil?. lg from imputier* in the blood. .OIOS and Insist on gaiting st* of Uombtfnl ?olmo. express prepaid. . Baltimore, lld., U. S. A. Mt? PHARMACY. I W nen the cold VY ave fl ag is up Jr Winter ? is here ia earnest, and with it all the miserable symptoms ol Catarrh ! return-blinding headaches and neuralgia, thick mucous discharges j from the nose ss? throat, a hacking- cough and pain in Ute chest, bac* taste iu the mouth, fetid breath, nausea and all that makes Catarrh the most sickening and disgusting of all cemplaints. It causes a feeling of pet. eon al defilement and mortification that keeps one nervous and anxious whHe in the company of othtaa. " . " . _ In spit?of Ll effort, to prevent it *?~iZS^?^\ the filthy secretions and mucous mat- tlu?ttwoompwtl?.di^J?^J^ ter find their way into the Stomach mao un drop pis a* in th* throat ac??' and are distributed by the blood to atant destrato hawk and a^it,f*?iW every nook and corner of the system; of dzynooo ia the throat, oonah OM the Stomach and Kidneys, in fact apittin? upon riain* la tb? tooran, > every organ and part of the body, be- formina-in the noa?, whioh? come infected with the catarrhs! quired much efiort tc blow out, son?, noison Thia disease is rarelv if ever time? causing tho noa? to bleed ami poison, i nis aisease is rarely, ? ever, iaftvlnff ^ a ?lok haadac?M eveninitsearliest stages, a purely local had thnu lnffwed f??flv6 JJJ* I disease or simple inflammation of the j oommenced to talcs 8. 8. a aas nose and throat, and this is w/iy sprays, after I had takcm thrso largo bo^uf washes, powders and the various in- I noticed a chane? for the batu/, haling mixtures fail to cure. Heredity Thus encouraged,! continued to taV is sometimes back of it-parents have ** a?4 ,n a short -while woe entirely' it and so do their children. 0tt*e4- ?H?SOJf ^ELLA*. In the treatment of Catarrh, anti- Main and Vine Sts.,aiohmond, vj septic and soothing washes are good for cleansing purposes or clearing tin' head and throat, but this is the extent of their usefulness. To cure Catarrh! permanently, the blood must be purified and the system relieved of its load' of foul secretions, and the remedy to accomplish this is S. S. 8. which has S_ ^?mm^^ no equal as a blood purifier. It restores nf*V-n7l| ?itW Illili tho blood to a natural, healthy state and S, ^^7*^ \ *Kna.7^ catarrh al poison and efiete matter ^?^^V ure carried out of tho system through tte' lbw jMl law jl proper channels. 8. S. 8. restorestot?& %^^aV K^^y blood all ita good qualities, and when ^^???^ rich, pure blood reaches tho inflamed membrane and is carried through the circulation to all the Catarrh infected portions of the body, they soon heal, the mucous discharges cease and the patient is relieved of the most offensive and humiliating' of all complaints.; . S. S. S. is a vegetable remedy and contains nothing that could injure the most delicate constitution. It eurea Catarrh in its most aggravated forms, and cases apparently incurable and hopeless. Write us if you have Catarrh, and our physicians will advise you without charge. THE SWIFT SPEOIFiO QO,9 ATLANTA, QA. OM BM M U\ Ttii* Establishment has been Soiling: -f U _tCJM X'X' U J?-E IN ANDERSON for more than forty years. Dar'iDg all that time competitors have come and gone, but wo have remained right here. Wo have always sold Cheaper than auy others, and during those long years we have not had one dis satisfied customer. Mistakes will sometimes occur, and if at any time we found that a customer wa j dissatisfied we did not rest until we had made bim satisfied. This policy, rigidly adhered to, has made us friends, true and last ing, aud we can say with pride, but without boasting, that we have the confi dence of the people nf this section. Wc have a larger Stock of Goods this season than We have rver had, and we pledge you our word that we have never sold Furniture at us close a margin of profit as wo are doing now. This ii proven by tho fact that wo are selling Furniture not only all over Anderson County but in every Town in the Piedmont section. Come aud see us. You parents saved money by buying from us, and you? and your children can save money by buying here, too. We carry EVERYTHING in tho Furniture line, C. F. TOLLY & SOW, Depot Straet. The Old Reliable Furuiture Dealeril NO BETTER PIANOS Made iu tho world, and no lowei prices. Absolutely the highest grade that can be found, and the surprises how can such high ' grade Pianos be had Eo reasonable ? Well, it'? this way : Pianos are being sold at too great H profit. I save you from 25 to 40 per ctnt in the cost. I am my own book-keeper, salesman and collector -the whole ''Show." fee! No worked-over, second-hand repofsssed stock. I do not sell that kind, if yoi are alright your credit ia good withma Tlu* best Reed Organ 5rJ Ute world is the "Carpenter." f Will movtf u?-Expresa office December 1st. ML. WILLIS. A. c. STRICKLAND! DEWTI8T. OFFICE-Front Rooms over Fan] era aud Merchants Bank. The opposite cat Illustrates Conj tinuouB Gam .Teeth. Tbo Idea Plato-moro cleanly than the natal ral teetb. No bad tante or bre*S from Pla*-s of tbl* kind* - THE - are the most fatal of all dis eases. KIDNEY CURE to i Guarantssd Remedy or money refunded. Contains remedies recognized by emi nent physicians as the best for Kidney and Bladder troubles. PRICK 50c and SM?. FOP. PALE RY EVANS' PHARMACY BANK OF ANDERSON. J. A. BROOK, .President. JOS. N. BROWN, Vice Pr?sident.j B. P. MATJLDIN. Cashier li AT HORSE SHOEING We can serve you proroptlv end ic A workmanlike manner. Repairs on Carriages, Buggier and Wagons al ways secure rio** attention. Tho Wag ons wa build have nothing but high grn.de Wheel?. _ PAUL E. STEPHENS. Er A N WER 9?\ LVq tn? most heallno oaivo In ebsworth? PARKER'S HAIR BALSAM fl HM- IM ?wt? tiff JmSt. THE largest, strongest Bank in County. Interest Paid on Deposits By special agreement. With v?nsurpa?m?d facilities and rosos cea we ai sat all times prepared to? en m morl ato our 'Uxtomers. Jan 10,1000_ 29 NOTICE.) MR A. T. ?KELTON haa b? ..gaged hy the Anderson Mutudil lMUir*nce Co to inspect the buik insured iu thw Company, and ? commence work on the first of Jul Policy-holders are requested to hi their Policies at hand, so there ? be no unnecessary delay in the i epection. ANDERSON MUTUAL PIRK I BUR ANGE CO. ttffiLJS AND SfwboL?5 E. 6. MCADAMS, ATTO?JVISY AT X>A^" ANDERSON, 8. C par- Office in Second Story of the J dnrson Building, over tbs Clothing $ of C. A. R**-??. next door to F?rtt? and Merchants'B^n lr. Jan xi, 19US 30