University of South Carolina Libraries
^ft||)tt |ntel%mccr. ?" * _____ 'twas bitterly discontented that ?"morn? ing', arrd there is no denying it?discon? tented with my home, my husband, even with my baby. 1 remember the morning ?well?it was gray and cloudy, with" a low dragging* mist, that chiilcd' one to the bone, and- hung the trees with recking m< isture: Tho black mud, about the ?door of out'western home, was thick and . deep; and the bare floor of our one room was badly stained and soiled by the care? less feet of the rough shod working men. . I had beea cleaning up all the morning, - but the-.more I ? leaned the worse matters seemed to grow; soap and sand only v served to render black foot-marks more ?^visible ; and when a certain puff of wind './whirled the smoke and ashes down the pips of my' cooking-stove, covering the books and tables I had just taken so much ^.pains in dusting off, 1 threw myself in '"'the'"rocking-chair, and burst into a passion of- despairing tears. - We -brought the rocking-chair with us, Ned and I, when we left our cottage, on the outskirts of the city* and journeyed 3 westward. ^It was a pretty, cottage; My eye's.-fill with, tears even 'now at tho ; thought of it, with its low, breezy win? dows,, through which the odor of roses ?.'/fieated.the livelong summer; and its ".-/clean, wrell:ordercd.rooms, adorned with l all- those charming, useless little toys, /. that go so" far toward making a home g pleasant and attractive. It was my first i; home-after my marriage?and a woman V always loves that "home better than any -./other, We were very happy, Ned and J.; as cozy: and. comfortable as two robins " rn the heart of a summer apple-tree. Ned '. was a-clerkj-'bat with a salary, and some ? jUttle additions flowing in now and then from-otheaj^resources. And when bur .:' baby cam of "LittlePearl," as we called : her, our happrness was complete. : 5. But after a while this new rapture bo ; gan to cool; and as Little Pearl's eyes ;. deepened and expanded, Ned began to v.cast" about him in a sago and fatherly ?~: manner. "We: must" do "the best we can for Lit /?tle Pearl's sake, "Boll." " . That was the opening remark?a dis ' "closure- of. his plans followed, lie had i caught the western fever. ""Westward ':^e stj\r of empire makes its way," Ned" '-"<_aoted, with telling, emphasis, adding, / "we must foliow, Bell,"- and build up a ^wame-and a home for-Little Pearl!" ' I assented; as I'always did, to Ned's plans'; though, in my secret soul, I felt ; thattbe movement was a bad ono. We sold our pretty cottage and furniture at .a considerable^ sacrifice; Ned left his ^clerkship, and the November 'after Lit /tle Pearl's,birth "found us in our western homo. ? ' ?'. . Ned had urged "me to bring out our ."-servants; but,"in a fit of high-strung he 'roism, -I determined to be raaid-of-ttll ? work myself. Ned. would have to- sacri wfice-rbis case aDd comfort?I would not % 'be.:-behind "him. It was, comparatively light in the beginning,' when only Ned - and mj'self.were to providejfor; but after awh'ilc the. hired men came; and baby -/required more attention every day. The fall rains set in, converting the spongy r^spiL-into black, adhering riiud. I worked - late and early, but found it impossible to /take.care of my babe, and keep our rude . home iifanythiog like order. I bore up ? /as long as I could; but at last my strengt!? -utterly failed, and sitting down in the - rockiug-chair? I sobbed like a silly child. -.'/Libought of refold home, with its prct ' ty, well-ordered apartmeuts; of the hours , of'pl.easant leisure and .social enjoyment ' to which I had. been accustomed.; and . then,.-with a fresh gush of tears, I looked ? orit at the low, (railing mist, and around . the small, untidy room'in which I was imprisoned. It was wrong in Nod to .-bring me to such a place, and against my will, too. I thought bitterly. At that moment I heard tho voico of :lbe.sjck, hired man calling for water, and catching up the pitcher, 1 brushed away j ray tears, and ran up to the rude loft . where he lay. As I reached the bed, I saw by the sun.that it was almost noon, . and dinner was l;o cook"for Ned aud the lured men. Giving the invalid his water, -1 paused a-'moment-to mix a draught of medicine, my thoughts full of the smoking . stove, and dfstastoful'dutics that awaited ? me below; find just then, shrill and clear, ' came Littfo Pearl's cry. I threw down the dose I was mixing, exclaiming,almost ".- angrily : >It is no use. I can't get along/no mat? ter how hard I strive. "What shall I do i)ow? Oh, dear! 1 do wish I had no baby!" My very finger-tips thrilled with terror - ? tho instant the unwomanly wish had - -passed my Hps; and clearing the steps at two or three bounds, I rashed to the cor? ner where her crib stood, eager to clasp _ hor to my bosom, and pour out my re . morse in tears and kisses. 1 snatched away the curtain. The crib was there, so was the snowy pillow bearing the damp impress cf her head; but Little Pearl was gone. For a moment I stood dumb and almost senseless, then a swift thought came to my relief. c;iS'ed has stolen her to frighten me," I cried, and rushing out, I searched every? where to find him, but in vain. The mist was thickening into rain. I knew well enough that ho was too care? ful of hor to expose her in such a man? ner; yet I clung to the belief that he had ? stolen her. as I clung to my life. There -was fresh footprints in the black mud about tho door leading out toward tho wood lot, where Ned utid tho men were at work. I followed them, my head un? covered, unmindful of the chill and wind an'd.dTiving rain, plunging ankle- deep in? to the yielding soil at every step. About half way I saw something in the path be? fore me. It was a little crimson stocking! Myvheart leaped for )oy. Ned had stolon her, and she had kicked it from her foot on the 'way; it was cruel in him to fright? en me so. - I wondered if ho had heard that silly wish of mine!. Half a mile from the house I met him and the men coming homo to dinner. He started forward the moment he caught sight of me. "Oh. Bell! what's the matter.? Is Lit? tle Pearl sick ?" ^^Qa^ glance at his white, startled face, convinced' mo that my hope was vain ; [yet 1 cried oat angrily, "Yoii've got the child, Ned, you know you have?don't torture me any longer." "Bell, what do you mean?'' "She's gone?Little Pearl. You stole her, Ned, to frighten me?" "No; on my soul, Bell!" "Then she's gone; God has granted nie my wish. Oh ! my baby! my baby !" I was rushing past him, bnG he caught and held me fast, commanding me to tell him all?and I did. And then his after words thrilled my soul with horror. ?'The Indians! the Indians, boys!" ho cried, "they passed us. you know! They must have stolen her. Come I" They followed him without a word? and so did I. Over the spongy prairie mud, the chill wind ana driving rain beat? ing in our faces, through dense, dripping woods, down to the shore of the river. But we were too late. The last canoe was moored on the opposite shore. God had granted me my wish. I had no baby! Littlo. Pearl could not be found, al? though our efforts were ceaseless. Ilcr crib remained in its corner, with the im? press of her head on its pillow; but the littlo, laughing face, that had looked up at us from the depths of the coverlids, was gone forever. I had ample time to perform all my household labor then. No ? little, quivering cry to detain me when I was busy; no clinging hands hold? ing mine, and keeping them idle. My wish was granted me; I had no baby! "The desolate, inconsolable sorrow of the days that followed, no tongue can portray; the tender longing, the sharp, stinging remorse. But we lived and worked, for life and labor must go on, no matter how sore and weary our beams may be. At the end of five years, Ned looked round him on the ripe fruition of his most sanguine hopes. He had built him up not only a home, but a name, ?n this now country. We had pleasant homes, and luxurious furniture, and birds and flowers, and all the little attributes that ^0 to make np a happy homo. All did I say ? Not all?we were childless. Little Pearl had never come back, and God had given us no other child to fill her place ; but we desired no other, our grief for her loss being doarer and more sacred than any new lovo could everhavo been. Poor Ned, that unforgotten sorrow, to? gether with his arduous duties, made him an old man before his time; tLi silver}' threads were-thick on his temples, and the furrows on his head deeply cut; when we went back on a visit to our old home, the friends of his j'outh did not recognize him. His life had lost its impelling aim ?ind motive. One night, in the great city, wo were returning from the opera, when a voice startled U6. - "Please, sir," it said, "a penny to buy a loaf!" It wa3 mid-winter; the pavements wero glazed with ice; and the countless stars overhead glittered in the cold, blue sky like so many points of steel. I was dreaming of 1113: home in the far West, and longing for the hour of my return to come. A strange feeling of tenderness bound me to the spot where I lost my Little Pearl. I could not bear to be away from it, because of a foolish fear that she might come back again, and I not be there fo welcome her. . The slender, pleading voice broke in upon my. reverie; and gianeing out at the carriage window, I saw a small, child? ish figure, and a tiny hand, blue and stiff with cold. "Stop tlie carriage Ned; I shan't close my c}-es to-night, if we pass that child." My husband started up from his half doze and obeyed me. "A penny, please, sir, to buy a loaf for granny?she's sick." . Ned took a silver piece from his pocket, but I. caught his arm before he dropped it into the little, waiting hand. Some? thing in the soft blue eyes, looking up 60 pleadingly in the winter starlight, thrilled my heart to its inmost core. I 3-earncd to clasp the little, shivering form to my breast, to stroke back the tangled, golden hair from the pallid, want-pinched lace. "Take her up, Ned," I entreated ; she'll freeze if we leave her hire. Wo can put her out wherever she lives." " And good-natured Ned, who never de? nied me a thing in his life, complied. Down dark and unfrequented streets into one of th? lowest haunts of vice and pov? erty; then she guided us up a long flight of stairs into a careless attic. An old woman lay upon a heap of straw, her face wearing that cold, grayish hue which is the unmistakable precursor of death. "Have you como," she questioned, ca gerh*, as we entered ; "give me the loaf!" The child ran to hdr side, and bogan to stroke back her gray hair. "A good lady and gentleman's come," she lisped, softly. "I'm glad yer come," she said, address? ing Ned. "I'm goin', you sec; and some one oughter look arter :ier," pointing to the child. "Sho's a good little thing; I've had her wi' me six years next winter. She ain't mine, though. I got her from a. squad o' Ingins, when my ole man run a flat-boat down the Mississippi. They'd stole her from sonic one and brnng her by our cabin, and she was such a purty little thing that the ole man an' mo struck a trade for her. I allers kept her clothes, the ones she had on, in case her friends might know her, if they ever turned up, but they didn't; an' now I'm goin', and she'll be left to herself. You might look arter her, madam, couldn't yo?". "Whore are the clothes she had on ?" asked Ned and I, eagerly, and in the same breath. She looked into my faco inquiringly, and then pointed to an old trunk. Ned bro^e it open. There they wore in a faded heap; the dainty embroidered slip, the tiny pinafore, and one crimson stock? ing. Its fellow lay in the bottom of my drawer in my far wostcrn homo. "Oh, Ned?" I cried, "she is Little Pearl." And so she was. We had found hor at j last, our baby, our darling. ? A lady, who was very modest ami > submissive before marriage, was observed ; by her friend to use her tongue pretty j freely after. "There was a time when I I almost imagined she had none." "Yes," saidghcr husband, with a sigh, "but its very long since!" From the Southern Cultivator. A Letter from Gemes Munro. Mississippi, Feb. 1SG7. Mr. Editur:?Thar ain't no use to deny it, ibc its jest as the poit said, some twen? ty hundred yores afore this here present writer, when lie said, "limes aint as they aster was." No sir, when 1 kast my op? tical luminaries askant, and xperience the floatin' events what ar happenin ever and anon, kontinually, I'm Icon strained to mako u.?,c of the aforesaid poit's language, with felins kin tor mclankoly. Every? thing is changing, and I leant keep up with 'cm. "We go from bad to bad er, and I'm alercd there is a worser still away fernent the present. 1SG6 has disceasod ?gone glimmering?been wound up and slid silently back into the vast lumber room, whar time draps as it wares out? taint even a "skool boy's tail." Kould I step back inter that thar aforesaid "room" I'd pick up the yere '6C and wipe out a heap er things recorded agin Gomes Mun? ro. Yes sir; dont know but I'd tear the hole kontrapsion. from Krismus lor Kris mus, and let (35 run smooth into G7?skip pin 4th July, even. "How, 0 ! how ar the might}* a fallin !" But its all been did now, and its too late to cry after yer b??s ar tore. Wisdom says mend um quick, ter kivcr yer nakidness?be more kerefid and tare cm no more. I wound up at the end or the ycre with 31 bales er ketten?havin spent 25 bales ter make the 31. Now I have the 31 to run me throu this yere. The niggci-s made but little, and I made but little? ?but bavin adopted the britches parable, proverb, cr whatever it tis, I am tryin it agin, and don't low to give up yit?how? ever, everything is a runnin kontrarywisc. Tho't I'd ship ten bales or kotlon to Mo? bile tother day, and bawled it ter the De? po?a feller kum up an said he had ter way the kotton afore it kould go?that he war government agent and somcthin bout rivcrnue. 1 told him it want government kotton, but belonged to mc and the nig? gers what made it. All the same, ho said, and wayed the hole of it afore I kould x plain a thing about hit; then said that I must fix up the taxes afore it kould git on the kars. You kno I told yer I wa3 tryin to quit fight in and kussin, so I sot right down thar all day, ter see if he done everybody the same way, but ho did, and I had to give that thar chap nigh on to ore hun? dred S tor git the kotton released from konfiskasion, and get it on the kars. Do they do your Georgy folks in this way Mr Editur? Has the North busted up. and art: we cany in on the Goverment by taxin cotton ? ?Somcthin isrong?thing's ortcr be more equil on "the best Gover? ment on the ycath." What sorter pcr ducc have the}* got, they .tax like kotton ? May be wo aint back in the Goverment yit- but then yer kant make a feller pay the preacher afore he jincs the church.? I'm so fur behind, I kant understand their changes. I'm lookin fur a tax on korn and pertaters, next thing. When they do that, blievc I'll quit the hole kontrap? sion, go out an jine the inj uns, whar thar aint no laws, taxes, Goverment agents, nor mithin else, and every feller skufilcs for hissclf. Ter tax one set er folks and not the tother, aint that konfishasion ? Whar's the use cr callin it taxes. When me and my folks lived on Little River, Georgy, I uster to go to town?run my ban in my pocket, pull out a few ihrips and bits, pay my taxes, get a recipe, and heard no more of taxes that yere; but now, out here, you kan't sneeze thout pay in for it, and its that way all thro the yere. Then, when krismus komes, they jest mako a clean sweep, and take nigh onto all yer produce. Yer kant write a '?One day after date." thout by in a per? mission and stick;n it on. Has Missis? sippi moved ter England? Do white folks git auy thing out er the "Civil Rights Bill?" If so, what civiltics, and whar ar yorrighis? Ar "all men born free and equil," as they uster was? If so, whar's your freedom and yer equil ? Yer see I'm so fur behind the times, I kant locate my? self?believe I'm lost. They say the nig? ger's free?if so, I know white lolks ar sold, and we aint found out who we be? long ter?-just a slosh in round loose?stray dogs thout anybody ter give us a bone. : Jerushalem! Wish a ycth quake would koine?make a big land slid? of Missis? sippi, and land her away out yandor in the Ocean, sorter Hand like. Somebody woud want us then, I rclcon, thout 3 cents on kotton. Then, if Alabammy and Geor? gy begun ter crack all round and slide slowly, wouldn't somebody wantto throw 1 on tho grapplin' irons, and may be offer a premium of 3 cents on kotton. Whoop o? wouldn't ther be a shakin cr the dry bones in Ivongress, and a bcllowin and tarrin up cr dirt by the Bulls on Wall Street. Yer 5-20's would drop down to 1-nohtins, and grcenbacksberkomc thum papers fur kollored children. This may never Iconic to pass?that is ter say, the land-slide; but that other things?i.e., "shakin of dry bones," and thum papers? ?is as certain as Krismus, if things keeps cr goin on as they ar now. Aint the goose most died whar laid the golden nig? Aint Kongriss sittin on a litter of foreign aigH, and a hachin out things never heard of afore? Don't the hole elements (pcrlitically spcekinj stink er rotten aigs? In short, (speelcin of free? dom) aint the hole kontrapsion a dad-rat ted skunk stensh in ther nostcrls of the Ivoustilusion as it uster was? The Scriptnr tells of aonruly boy what cut up tremendusly and seceded from his daddies government. This boy arter tryin ter live solus bolus, sorter busted up and cum nigh onto starvin, and wont back home. Tho old man seed him a komin afar off, down the lane, and run out arid met and hugged him; put a bran new coat of many kollcrs on him; had the fattest yea Hin on the place killed and bar bakucd, and all the nabors cum over, and they had a big dinner, and the old man wai happy, for his sou war found. I x pect they had chicken fixens, and a heap cr other good things. Well, away back yandor in 01, we down South, got ter cut tin up, and busted loose from the old house at Washington, and made right sharp history for 4 yores?wo did ! But then we wore out all our clothes; eat up all our sugar and mcrlassis; got ter drin kin tatcr IcofFeo, sorgum whisky and sing iu "hard ap," and the boh; land got lcivcr ed all over (xcopt whar thar was to ho a [ fight) with detailed under-strappcrs, rum-1 atised Iiominissary's and \ Masters?in? somuch that the land wouldn't support tho "Stay-at-homes" cvon. Thcso, tcr gctlicr with a hold mixture of other cir kuinstances, too unpleasant to mention now, made us all start hack to the old home. Well, we have been a walkin down the lane, for nigh onto 2 ycrcs. Has aii3-body givo you an}- new clothes. Mr. Editur ? Have }'ou ever heard of a yenr lin hein kill'd and barbakucd. Ain't we all standin at the gate, tryin tor sing Hail Kollombia, and a hollowin hell?lo ! fur the folks tor kome out? Ain't the yard full er barkin, snarlin curs, ready to tar oft'even our old clothes. Says I, "Watch? man, what er the night?" Says he, "I leant see the Millennium yet!" I am yourn, kompletcly lost, Cremes munro. - How he Lost Iiis Tail. "Gentlemen,' said a tall Kentuckian, hauling up, and leisurely taking his seat in a vacant chair, "don't make fun of that dog, if you please," aid with a face of pro? found melancholy and touching pathos he added, "unless you want to hurt his lecl ings." "Of course not, sir, if you dislike it. But pray, how did he become curtailed ot his fair proportions ?" "Well, gentlemen," I'll tell you," said the Kentuckian replenishing the spacious hollow of his cheek with a quid of to? bacco. "That thar dog was the greatest bear hunter ol Kaintuck. A few years ago 1 used to take my rifle and old Riptearer, ol an afternoon, and think nothing of killing ten bears. One cold day in the middle of winter, hein' troubled a good deal with an old lie bear that used to carry off our pigs by the dozen, I started with Riptear? er determined to kill the old rascal, or die in the r.ttcmpt. Well, arter we had gone about two miles in the woods, wc all of a sudden came right smack on the old bear with his wife and three cubs. I knowed I could'nt shoot 'em all at once, and I knowed if I killed either of the old'uns, t'other would make at me, for I could see they were mortal hungry. So says I, 'Rip what'll we do?" Rip knowed what I was saying, and without waiting to hold any confab about it, he guv a growl and pitched right in among them. With that I let fly at the she bear, cos I knowed she was the worst of the two when the cubs was about. "Over she rolled as dead as a mackerel. Rip he hitched on the bear, and they had a mighty tussel for about live minutes, when the bear began to roar enough like blue murder. I ran up and knocked his brains out with the but end of my rifle. The cubs were so skcered and cold that I killed 'em all in two minutes with my knife. But Rip took on terrible about my knocking the bar on the head. At fust 1 thought he was going to tackle on me, and says I, 'Rip, that's down right un? grateful.' With that he sneaked off in a huff, but I could easily sec that he was terrible mad yet. Well, I left all the bears on the ground, concluding to call back with the neighbors for 'em as soon as 1 could let them know. On the way home, Rip kept' ahead of me. Every time he thought how I killed the old bear, his tail would stand right straight up on end?he was so powerful mad. It was gettin' on to night and began to grow freezin' cold. About half a mile from the house, Rip he eame to a halt, thinking he'd have anoth? er look back in the direction of the bears. The scent of 'em raised his dander was than ever. His tail stood right square up. as still'as a hoe handle. Just then it comes on colder than ever, and Uip's tail friz ex? actly as it stood. 1 was in a bad'fix ? 1 had no fire to thaw it. While I was think in' what I'd do to get it down agahi, a buck deer sprung up and darted right over a fence about fifty yards ahead. Hip did not. wait to be told what- to go, but pitch? ed evil bent arter the deer. 1 cracked away with my rifle and just raised the fuzz between his horns. As soon as Rip got to the fence, he thought heM make a short cut, so he dashed right through, but his tail was so brittle that it broke oft be? tween the rails. Poor old Rip was done fur good. He never had a tail to show after that?it broke his feelings as well as his tail, and that's how he came to lose it, And now, gentlemen, I'm gettin' a little dry, ami if vou'vc no objections, we'll lake a horn." The Yankkk.?Ad ::irnl Sennits, of the Memphis Jiulldin\ draws the following lively picture of the Yankee race: "The individual energy, industry and enterprise of this remarkable race is equal? ly astonishing. They construct the Jong? est railroads, dig the deepest canals, and build the finest ships ot any people in the world. When wc were afloat in the Ala? bama, endeavoring to prevent these icono? clasts from pulling down the idol of gov? ernment which they had SO recently sei up. if we were in doubt as to the nationality of any ship wc were pursuing, we had onlv to take a good look at her, at whatever distance she might be, through our teles? cope, to determine at once whether she was Yankee or not. It she excelled the ships of all other nations in the symmetry of her hull, the length, the grace, and the taper of her spars; if her canvass was whiter, her sails larger, more beautifully set, and 'sheeted home,' and hoisted in a more seamanlike manner ; if, in short, like a beautiful woman, she ravished flic be? holder as well by the swelling and grace? ful outlines of her ligure, as by the witch? ery of her drapery, we were alwavs sure she was Yankee. What is it that the Yankee cannot do 'i And whether he can do it or not, what is it that he will not at? tempt? He has recently invaded the Holy Land, intent upon uprooting the Turk anil get ling possession of the holy sepulchre. The Sultan had belter look out for himself. If lie permits the cockatrice's egg to hatch he is gone. The Yankee will steal his very yatagan and turban, aud swear that they are his own." --o? ? ? There arc two of the impulses in man's nature?industry and idleness?to one ot which lie is bound lo yield, either going the way leading to happiness or i hat lead? ing to utter worthlessness. They are so distinct, the effects they produce are so entirely different, and we have illustra? tions of travellers in the path of glory so beautifully line, that it should be an in? centive to put forth all our energies to walk in that path, which, though rugged and rough it may be, still contains at its end the'goal of higher honor. _-__ _A secret warranted to keep in any cli? mate?a woman's age. The Franchise Law in Tennessee. The unanimous decision of the Supreme Court of Ten iicssce, is that the Acts of the Legislature of June 5, 1SG5, and May 3, ] 806j determining the qualifications of vo? ters, and limiting the elective franchise, are constitutional. The opinion of the court, delivered by Justice Shackelford, discusses at length the formation of the present State Government, and conclusive? ly shows that the people of the State, in their sovereign capacity; had conferred up? on the Legislature full and ample power to determine these matters, and that in exercising this power it had not exceeded the limits of constitutional provision.? The court held that the elective franchise is not an inalienable right of privilege, but a political right, conferred, limited or withheld at the pleasure of the sovereign people or their representatives; that once granted, it may be taken away by the ex? ercise of sovereign power, and if so taken away, as by an alteration in the Constitu tion of the State, no vested right is viola? ted or bill of attainder passed, or act of pains and penalties, in the sense of the United States. It was further held, 1 hat the effect of the pardon of the President of the United States was to restore the citizen to the rights and privileges of a citizen of the United States, but did not restore to him the political rights, as a citizen of the State, which the people, ac? ting in their sovereign capacity,' denied to him. Fortune Teixtxg.?One of our ex? changes is responsible for the following story relative to this popular and perni? cious voice: Not many evenings since it is recorded that a sinner who has escaped hanging for lo! these many years, was in company with several ladies. The object of fortune telling was introduced. Several of the "angels"' pleaded guilty to the solt im? peachment of having written toM'lle. This and Madam That to furnish them leaves in their future history. Instances were men? tioned or some very remarkable develop? ments in a certain case hereabout. Elder K-was asked for his opin? ion. He replied : "So far as I am person? ally concerned, 1 know more about myself than I wish to. I don't think any good comes of those things. I had a friend who dressed himself in a lady's clothes and called upon a celebrated prophetess. He did not believe that she would discov? er the disguise, but he heard what made him exceedingly unhappy." Here the old reprobate ceased. A lady much interest? ed asked, "What did she tell him?"?"She told him he was to marry soon, and be? come the mother of ten children !" A Doctor as is a Doctor.?A self-surf ficent humbug, who took up the position of a physician, and pretended to have a knowledge of the art, was once called to visit a man with the apoplexy. Dolus gazed long and hard, felt his pulse, and finally gave vent lo the following sublime opinion : "I think he's a gone feller." "No, no, do not say that," exclaimed the sorrowful wife. "Yes," resumed Beins, lifting up his hat and eyes heavenward at the same time, "yes, 1 do say so; there ain"t no hope, not the least mite. He's got an attack of nihil tit in his lost front is?" ??Where?" cried the startled wife. "In his lost frontis; and can't be cured without some trouble and a great deal of pain*. You see the whole planetary sys? tem is deranged. Fiistly, his voxpopuli is pressing on his advalornm; secondly, his eutacnrpial cutaneous has swelled conside? rably, if not mere; thirdly, and lastly, his ribs arc in a concussed state, ami he hain't got any money : consequently, he isbound to ilie." latiire is the same all over the world,'cept n New England, and thar it is, 'cording to Pkoverhs ok Josn Billings.?"Human na* in sarcumstances.' "I?um is good in it- pince, and hell is the place for it.'' "If 1 had a boy who didn't lie quite well enuff'to suit me, I would set him tu tend? ing a retale dry goods store." "lie who kan ware a shurt a week and keep i! klean, ain't n'l for ennything else." "I never knu a fool who hadn't a good voice." "Thieves hunt in couples, but a Her has no accomplice." "There is multitudes of folks who mean well enutF, but how like the devil thev act." J "Give tho devil his due, may read well en tiff in a proverb, but mi friend, what will be cum uv me und you if this arrangement \z carried out ?" ? An attorney who wished to show his smartness by quizzing an old farmer at an elect ion dinner, began asking him if there was many girls in the neighborhood.? "Yes, there's a dreadful sight of em,'' re? plied the old man; "so many that there ain't half enough respectable husbands for em all, and some of cm are begin ing to take up with lawyers!" The attorney didu't follow up the sub? ject. -: If a Laddie Meets a Lassie.?If a lad? die meets a lassie walking in the street ; if the lassie wears a "tiltor"?shows ar ankle neat; if the wind is rudely blowing, lifts her skirts too high, and the laddies sees that ankle need the lassie cry? Even lassie wears a "liltcr" and a -'hiiiderpest," I and a metal "palpitator*' on her snowy breast, If when married to the lassie these false charms he spy; if he says, I'm sold, by jingo!" need a lassie cry ? _-?-* _fjc wlio can lind nobody that will credit a word he says, may fairly boast that he has no creditors. SHIVER & BECKHAM, wholesale and retail dealers ix DEY GOODS, Plain .Street, 2U door from Main, COLUZVIliSIA., SO: CA.. It. C. SIllVKR, ye, >|. BECKHAM. UAVJP 4?xe3. S6i 2m PLANTER'S HOTEL, Avar sta. a a., NEWLY Furnished anil refitted, unsurpassed by any lintel South, was rc-opened lo the public Oc? tober S. )8U?, by T. S. NICKKR80N, Proprietor, late of the Mills House, Charleston, and pro-pric (ov of Niekersou's Hotel, Columbia, S. C. Nov 30, 186? 6mi ^ Miscellaneous Advertisements THE YOMVILLE ENQUIRER, Literary and Family Newspaper. Enlarged and Improved for 1867. NSW TYPE AND NEW ATTEACTIONS! FOUR ORIGINAL STORIES, AND THREE VALUABLE PREMIUMS !! ! THE ENQUIRER Trill appear on Thursday, the 3rd day of Jnnury, 1S07, increased in size, and printed on entirely new material, with the latest improvements in the art, presenting a more attrac? tive appearance, and containing at least five addi? tional columns of reading matter?the largest newspaper in the State outside of Charleston, The Editorial department will be conducted by Mr. James E. Wilson, assisted by Major James F. Hart. Mr. James Wood Davidson will continue his versatile "Contributorials" from Columbia. Four original Novcletts, written expressly for the Enquirer, will be published during the year The following are the titles: ??The Spectre of the Fireside"?by J. Wither spoon Erwin. "The Shadow on the Wall"?by John Este? Cookc. ?The Wealth of Home"?by Mrs. M. A. Ewart. 'Elinor Westervell, the Tory's Niece"?by Car? oline F. Preston. TERMS?IX AD VAXCE. spkice cunn Bscs' One copy one year, ? 2 50 $ 3 50 Two copies one year, 4 00 6 00 Five copies one year, 8 75 12 50 Ten copies one year, 17 50 25 00 One copy six months, 1 25 2 00 To the person sending us the largest club of subscribers, at ?1 75 in specie, or S2 50 in cur? rency, we will award a Patent. Cotton Planter, which will cost in Charleston fifty dollars. To the person sending us the next largest club, on the same terms, we will award a Patent Corn Planter, which will cost in Charleston thirty dol? lars I To I he person sending us the third largest list, on the same terms we will award one of Ames' Double Corn Shelle.-s, cost in Charleston, twenty dollars! The premiums wiil be awarded to the successful competitors on the 'irst Monday in March next, at '?) o'clock. The names should be sent in, however, as I hey are obtained : additions b$?ng mode to the list up to the day of tue u.vfuid. No names will be counted unless paid for. &si>-" To persons who may make up clubs of ten or more names, but who may fail to obtain a prize, we will send the Enquirer one year free of charge, and a copy of either "The Land we Love," "Scott's Monthly .Magazine,'' or "Godev"s Lady's P>ook." L. M. GRIST, Yorkville. THE TRI-WEEXLY PECEKTX, vcblishei) at COLUMBIA.. SO. CA, CONTAINS the latest, roost interesting and im? portant News from every section. Neatly printed on good paper. terms?ix adva5ce: Tri-Weekly one year, ?2 50 Weekly one y?ar. 1 50 Advertisements inserted on reasonable terms. Address JULIAN A. SELBV, Columbia, S. C. . DAILY SOUTH CAROLIHIAHT, F. G. DbFONTAINE; Editor and Proprietor, COLUMBIA. S. C. TERMS: Daily, twelvemonths, 5fi 00 Daily, six months. t .100 Daily, three months, 1 50 Single Copies, . 05 To News Dealers. (Strictly in advance.) Advertisements inserted on reasonable terms. Address as above. Greenville & Cojainbia Rail Koa!. General Srrr.itixt'rxdent's Office, ?Limbio. Sept. 12, lKtfU. On and after Monday. 17ih inr>t.. the Passenger Trains will be run daily, (Sunday's excepted) un? til further notice, as follows : Leave Columbia at - - 7 15 a. m. " Alls-ton. - - 9 05 " Newberry. - - 10 05 a. m. Arrive at Abbeville, - - 3 13 p. m. " m Anderson. - - 5 10 *? " " Greenville, - - 5 40 " Leave Greenville at - - ? 00 a.m. " Anderson, - -. '- -? 30 '* " Abbeville, - - 8 35 a. m. " Newberry, - 1-0 p. m. Arrive at Alston. - - 2 45 " - ?? " Columbia, - 4 40 44 - The bridge at Alston being now completed, pas? sengers and freights will be transported without delay. The expense ol freights, bj t lie discontin? uance of tho wagons and boats, will be largely reduced. J. B. L.vSALLE, Gcn'l Supt. Sept 20. 18GG 14 Schedule over S. C. Railroad. GENERAL SLT'TS OFFICE, Cuaki.kstox, S. C, Nov. 3, 18G& ON and after Wednesday, November 7, 1806, the Passenger Trains of this road will ruu the following schedule : augusta train*. Leave Charleston", S.OO n. m. : Arrive at Columbia, 5.^0 p. m. Arrive at Augusta, 5.00 p. m Leave Augusta. 7.00 a. m. Leave Columbia. 6.50 a. m. Arrive at Charleston, -L00 p. m. tiikol'cii xait. train'. Leave Augusta, &6Q p. m. Arrive at Kingsvillc, 1.05 a.m. Arrive at Columbia, 3.00 a. hi. Leave Columbia. 2.0? p. m. Arrive at Cingsville, ?L40 p. m. Arrive at Augusta. 12.00 night. IL T. PEAEEj Gcn'ISup't. Novl'i. 1SCC 22 Schedule over Hie Blue Ridge Railroad. ON and after Monday the 17ih inst., the Trains on the IWue Ridge Railroad will leave Anderson for Pendleton and Walhalla, on Wednesdays and Saturdays, after the arrival of the Greenville & Columbia Railroad Trains. Will leave Walhalla on Mondays at 3J o'clock, a. in., connecting with the down Train of Green? ville ix Columbia Railroad. Will leave Walhalla on Wednesdays at 10 o'clock, a. m. W. IT. D. GAILLAED, Superintendent 15. R. R. R. Sept 20, 1SG6 15 m HOESEY, SUCCESSOR OF mm???* pirp & ss* ptfs, Caps anb Strato (Boobs, Ho. 25 HAYNE STREET, CHARLESTON, S, C, Dec 0,18(55 25 LIVERY AND SALE STABLES? 350 BROAD STREET, AUGUSTA, GEORGIA.. Dec 5, 180? v 3Qi