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ititmorous department He Landed a Job.?"What can I do for you?" asked a weary man who ? called at the office of the Globe Museum of a gaunt young man who entered. "I want an engagement as a freak in the curio hall." "Who are you?" "I am Enoch, the egg king." "What is your specialty?" "I can eat three dozen hen eggs, two dozen duck eggs and one dozen goose eggs at a sitting." "Hum. We give four shows a day." "1 understand that." "Do you think you can do it?" 1 OUIC Ulll. "And on ho/idays we give a performance every hour." The young man hesitated. "In that case," he said, "I must have one thing: understood before I sign a contract." "What's that?" asked the managrer. "No matter how rushing business is at the museum," the egg king replied, "you gotta gimme time enough to eat my regular meals at the hotel." Her Compensation,?The cook for a well known Seattle family left, and no other could be obtained, so the lady of the house did the cooking herself, with such satisfactory results that, after a month, her husband gave her a beautiful set of sables as a token of his appreciation of the good dinners he had enjoyed.- This moved one of the neighbors to act accordingly when her cook quit suddenly. Addressing her husband, she said: "Well, the cook has gone and I'm not going to bother to get another. I'm going to do the cooking myself, deary. You heard what Mr. So-and-So gave his wife when she did the cooki.ig?" And, putting her arm around his neck, she cooed: "What shall I get for my cooking?" "Woman," said her husband, pushing her away, "you will get a long black veil." The Joke Wee On Ted.?T. A. Dorgan, Tad the cartoonist, was dining alone in a restaurant in Fulton street the other night. A stranger dropped into the seat opposite and fell to discussing cartoons. "Now, take my old friend Tad," said the stranger. "I like him personally. In fact, we are the best of friends, but as an artist he is punk." "You know Tad, then?" Tad asked. "Know him! I should say I do." "I'll bet you $5 you don't know him," said Tad, reaching for his wallet. The $10 was deposited on the table. "Now," said the cartoonist, "how are you going to prove that you would know Tad if you saw him?" "That's a cinch," chuckled the stranger, as he gathered in the money. "You are Tad."?Cartoon's Magazine. Heaven Devoid of Males.?"Speaking of marriages," remarked a woman at a social alTair recently, "I could never quite understand one of the Biblical references to it." "To which one do you particularly refer, Mrs. Jones?" asked another of the guests. "About marrying in heaven," answered Mrs. Jones, thoughtfully. "Why do you suppose there is no marrying nor giving in marriage in heaven?" "That's an easy one!" promptly -u matrAn *4T Hnn't t'llippru III a oaiWiouv ?uu.v. V/... - ?.v.. . suppose there is a man in the place." -Tit-Bits. She Found a Way.?She had tried in vain to get the telephone, but the other parties were using the line. The last time she heard one woman say: "I have just put on a pan of beans for dinner." She tried later, but the women were still talking. Exasperated, she broke in crisply: "Madam. I smell your beans burning." A horried stream greeted this remark and then she was able to put in her call. Tale Told Too Lato.?"Now, Thomas." said the teacher severely, "how many times must I tell you not to snap your fingers? Put your hand down and presently I'll hear from you." Five minutes later she said: "Now, then, Thomas, what was it yau wanted to say?" "There was a man in the entry awhile ago," said Thomas serenely, "and he went out with your new silk umbrella." Hi? Answer.?The stupid person sometimes says a witty thing without knowing it. A professor in a medical college had one exasperating student. "You see, Mr. Smith," said the professor to this young man one day, "the subject of this diagram limps, because one of his legs is a trifle short er than the other. Now. what should you do in such a case?" "I should limp, too, I think, sir," replied the student, with an expression of perfect innocense on his face. He Saved Himself.?The doctor told her that what she needed was a Rood hearty meal at niRht and then to stop thinkinR about her indigestion. "But, doctor, only two months ago you told me to avoid dinner at night, and to take a light supper instead." "Oh, did I?" replied her medical adviser, reflectively. "Well, that shows what marvelous strides medical science is making." Difference of Opinion.?Lecturer?I have single-handed killed five lions at once and that were trying to attack me?" Voice in the Gallery?Turn over? you're lying on your back. Boy with thhe peanuts?Seems to me he's lying on his feet.?Jacksonville Times-Union. Naturally Late.?A customer, after waiting several minutes for an oxtail soup, called the waiter to him and asked the reason it was behind. The waiter, who was Irish, gently answered: "Oxtails are always behind, sir." ?Kansas City Star. Not Compulsory.?"You know, dear, Cholly says if women get the ballot it will only increase the ignorant vote." "Don't let him mislead you, dear. You won't have to vote unless you want to."?Buffalo Express. When Greek Met Greek.?Doctor? How much are you going to charge me for winning that law suit. I-awyer?How much are you going to charge me for removing my appendix.?I.ife. pisfcllanfous grading. APRIL Interesting Facts Pertaining to the Fourth Month of th? Year. Written for the Yorkville Enquirer. April, the fourth month in our calendar, which contains thirty days, was the second month in the old Roman calendar. April comes from a Latin word, aperire, which means to* open, because the buds open themselves at this period. Before the time of Julius Caesar, the month of April contained only twenty-nine days. He added the thirtieth. In the time of the Emperor Nero, who resigned shortly after the resurrection of Christ, April was called Nein honor of Nero. On all antique monuments and statues the month of April is represented as a dancing youth with a rattle in his hand. There are many ancient ceremonies and customs pertaining to the month of April?one of the best known of which is April fool's day, which always occurs on April 1. This custom of sending people on empty errands and laughing at them on April 1, is common in every country in Europe and wherever the English language is spoken. There are two accounts of its origin. Oriental scholars say that it is derived from the "hull" feast among the Hindus, where a similar custom prevails, while others say that it comes from a celebration of Christ being sent to and fro between Herod, Pilate and Caiphas. April is the anniversary month of a number of famous naval battles in the world's history. Among them being the battle of Gibraltar Bay, in which the Dutch defeated the Spanish, April 25th, 1607, and the Battle of Santa Cruz, in which the Spanish fleet was destroyed by# the English, April 20, 1697. The two greatest wars in the history of the United States began in April? the Revolutionary war beginning with the battle or Liexingron, lougm uctween American citizens and British soldiers, April 19, 1775, and the war between the sections, which may be said to have opened with the capture of Fort Sumter, near Charleston, by South Carolina volunteers, April 13, 1861. Four years later, in April, the Confederate troops under General Lee, surrendered at Appomattox?April 8, 1865. It was in April, 1607, that the first English settlers of the American continent (Jamestown, May 13, 1607) left England for their new homes in an unknown land. Four presidents of the United States ?Thomas Jefferson, James Monroe, James Buchanan and Ulysses S. Grant, were born in April, and it was April 14, 1865, that President Lincoln was assassinated in a Washington theatre, by John Wilkes Booth, an actor. George Washington was Inaugurated the first president of the United States, April 30, 1789. William Shakespeare, the greatest dramatic poet the world has ever known, was born at Stratford-onAvon, England, April 23. It was on last Thursday that the birthday of Germany's strong man. Prince von Bismack, was celebrated, he having been born April 1, 1816? one hundred years ago. The battle of Monck's Corner, S. C., in which the Americans were defeated by English troops, was fought April 14, 1780, the Americans having 26 men killed and 73 wounded. THE GAME OF POLITICS Men of Right Motives and Sincere Convictions Only Sure Winners. Philadelphia Public Ledger. This is the time of the year when a "young man's fancy lightly turns" to politics. He is one of two things: Either that he is a Logical Candidate, for whom the people have been subconsciously clamoring since the founding of the town, or he is told that his name will help a cause, and if he is a susceptible young man, to whom the blandishments of place and power are pleasant, he succumbs to the tempter and gets into politics, whereupon he is upon the road to failure or success. He is either "doomed for a certain time to walk the night" as an unlaid ghost seeking in the highways and byways suffrages of the people, begging men for their votes until the wedding guest beats his breast and wishes that the young man was forty fathoms under the sea with a rock around him; or else the young man goes blithly into the business of making his private sentiment public sentiment, and his choice between the fruits of politics will mark his sucess or failure. There is nothing but ultimate failure for the man who goes into politics thinking that office is the chief end of politics. He may hold office one year, two years ,ten years, twenty years, a generation, but when he is defeated for office the defeat comes as a bitterness and shatters his faith in the wisdom of the populace. If he goes into politics for power either for himself or for his friends, if he plays politics as a game, sooner or later ho will find the cards running against him. and sooner or later he will quit politics disappointed and embittered. Hut if he goes into politics as a sower goeth forth to sow, realizing that it is not for this election or that candidate that he is working; if he is willing to accept defeat after defeat and realize that the things he stands for often are elected when his candidate and his Hag go down; if he can read local history wisely and see that the minority in most cases impresses itself upon the administration of the majority even deeper than the preelection platform and promises of the majority itself; if a man in politics is willing to spend his tim<\ his money, his energy and his good name entirely for a cause without any reference to the immediate temporary success of the candidates or parties who represent his cause, nothing can defeat that man and nothing can embitter him at the close of his career. Men who have been successful in politics are men who are willing to wait, men who are not fundamentally interested in winning this campaign or carrying that election. And in city politics particularly, where personalities often seem to win or lose, campaigns where mud-slinging is easy because candidates arc Intimately known to their neighbors, and copiously lied about, it takes a quality of courage and character to get into politics and is of a higher order than the courage and character of those who enter the larger arena. Yet the rewards of the city politician who goes in not for the spoils, not to win electi ns. but to carry out certain well thought out theories of municipal government, are surer than are the rewards of those who enter the larger field. Given a group of fifty or a hundred men In any city, who are willing to smile at slander, hoot at libel, grin at all "the flings and arrows of the outrageous" bunch in the city hall, and that crowd of thoroughbreds, even though it should lose campaign after campaign, will find its ideals accepted by the victors and its theories growing into city government. No crooked majority in a city is so crooked and so arrogant that it can afford, after its victory, to ignore the intelligent minority if defeated. It may hold torchlight processions over the political bodies of defeated candidates, it may roll the minority platforms in the dust and sneer and Jeer at the highbrow, goody-goody demands. But little by little every majority finds itself during the years of its administration taking up, some- j times in a modified form, but taking up, nevertheless, the very demands 1 and programme which it affected so ( brutally to scorn. T* '** omaaaoo r\t a man whn is 11 19 IIIC OUtWVOO V4 U ?* f...w - ? willing- to accept shame as his victory. , who is willing to accept contumely and ridicule as his triumph, who really > wins in politics. The man who gets the office, who heads the torchlight procession, who rides in the hand , wagon, is as sure to fail as day is to follow night. Politics is no place for the scrub who needs to win campaign and carry elections to justify his faith. But there is plenty of room in politics for the thoroughbred who can play his hand like a gentleman, lose like a prince and realize that ; temporary defeat of his cause is really his "triumph's evidence."?A. W White. MOST DEADLY MACHINE GUN ' I The Belgian "Rattlesnake" is the Invention of an American. , That gun?the "Belgian rattlesnake" as it came to be called on the firing line, because of its deadly rattle in action?is an American gun, says , Leslie's Weekly. It is the Invention of a retired United States army officer. , It is the most ferocious small death machine ever known, and yet one man can carry and operate it. Two years ago. Col. Isaac Newton Lewis, U. S. A., retired, late of the United States coast artillery, offered his invention on an automatic aircooled machine gun to the United States government, and It was tried out by United States aerial war craft in an official test at College Park, Maryland. Rear Admiral Frank F. Fletcher, U. S. N., then chief of naval ordinance, made the observation that 2.000 of these air craft could be purchased and equipped with the new machine gun for the price of a single battleship. And this was the verdict of Brig. Gen. James Allen, chief of the signal corps: "The effect on military warfare will be surprising." Precisely this is what the present European war has disclosed, with the Lewis machine gun being used by the Belgians first, and now, from the latest reports from the front, by both British and Russian troops, against the kaiser's men. Nevertheless, this gun was rejected by our government. Col. Lewis was told that he might dispose of his military "mowing machine" elsewhere, and the very first place he went was Germany. After several trials of his gun in the field and in airships by the German army corps, Col. Lewis was asked to sell the sole rights to the use and manufacture of his machine gun to Germany. This he refused to do, and he next tried England. The British government consented to his selling the guns to her allies, but at the time would not guarantee to take all that Col. I^ewis could manufacture. Col. Lewis then went over to Belgium, and there he sold his guns without any restrictions and, luckily for the Belgians, up to the time the war broke out he had been able to make only enough guns for their use. The result was that they were the only soldiers in the world possessing this most certain modern instrument of death when the Germans stormed Liege. To this gun is due In a considerable degree the terrible slaughter of the Germans in the invasion of Belgium. This gun is a new departure in ordinance. It is the only machine gun capable of rapid continuous fire under severe conditions without change of barrels, and without the use of water cooling. It is simple in construction and operation and on the firing line requires no tools or special equipment of any kind. The gun can be assembled or dismounted in thirty seconds with no other tool than the point of a bullet, and it can be fired singly or In bursts of any number of shots up to the fulll extent of the magazine, which can be placed in position in two seconds, and which can be adapted for any existing service ammunition. The normal rate of firing is 500 rounds per minute, but this may be increased or decreased by a simple adjustment. THE TOLL OF BLOOD. Killed and Wounded Total At Lcaat 6,000,000 Men. These figures stagger one, says a New York dispatch, but a moment's reflection will show that they are by no means exaggerated. The total losses so far in this war have been at least 6,000,000 killed, wounded or put out of action on both sides. The Prussian lists alone show losses ir. ovr.ocu nf i rtflft 000 men. and it is admitted that this is not half of the German losses. A very conservative estimate to date is that Germany has lost 2,500,000 men. and that Austria has lost nearly if not quite 1,000,000. Of the allies Russia has lost most heavily and although no accurate figures are available, her casualties total at least 1,500,000. The French have lost well over 1,000,000. Nobody knows what the Servian losses are, but they have been estimated at 225,000. Great Britain has lost at least 150,000, counting the casualties in her Indian forces. Belgium has had nearly 100,000 put hors de combat. This gives roughly a total loss of 3,000,000 for the allies and about 3,500,000 for their enemies. A million men is therefore not an exaggerated number to sacrifice in order to be able to break through the German lines. The fuct that preparations have been made on this basis shows that the elfort cannot now be long delayed. When will it take place? Quite recently Mr. Asquith, answering a question in the house of commons in reference to the operations in the Dardanelles, declared that some of the advantages that it was expected to derive from the forcing of the straits were so obvivious that it was unnecessary to state them, and that the other advantages were not so obvious, but It was undesirable to state them. The obvious advantages of the forcing of the Dardanelles is that the allied fleets will be able to take Constantinople and eliminate Turkey as a factor In the war. Also the outlet thus created frftm Odessa will release vast stores of Russian grain, and enable the passage of great supplies of ammunition and war equipment of which Russia undoubtedly stands in need. Vast numbers of men are available whose equipment is out of date, and although supplies are being rushed day and night over the TransSiberian railroad, the opening of a road to Russia from the Mediterranean will be a most potent factor in the great conflict now being waged on the Eastern front Less obvious but really Important are the political consequences of the forcing of the Dardanelles. With Turkey virtually beaten, the Balkan states will be i-resistibly drawn into the conflict on the side of the allies. Rumania is mobilized and ready to strike. Greece also is prepared, and Bulgaria could not afford to stay out l* tvntViop two nations entorsd the war, because only those who fight on the side of the victors can hope to divide the spoils. Italy May Shorten War. It is the same consideration that is drawing Italy into the struggle. With Turkey beaten, and the Balkan states aiding Servla in the invasion of Hungary, with all the Russian forces sweeping over the Carpathians now that Przemsyl has fallen, the fate of Austria is not really in doubt. Italy has everything to gain and risks nothing in entering the conflict on the side of the allies. But her entry may and probably will shorten the duration of the war, for her 3,000,000 soldiers are brave and well equipped with modern artillery and ammunition. Now in modern warfare there is no such thing as the element of surprise, the foundation of that brilliant strategy which won Napoleon's campaigns. Aeroplane scouting, the vast masses of men employed, and the fixed lines of railroads over which all great movements of troops must take place, have reduced warfare to a matter of brute force in which the number of guns and weight of projectiles, the number of men available and of lives to be sacrificed are the controlling factors. This element of brute* force is so important that it is certain that the great movement against Germany will be made only when the attack can be delivered from all sides at once. This means that unless the Turkish resistance is unduly prolonged the "great advance" will not take place till the Dardanelles have fallen and Italy and the Balkan states have come into the war. But whether this pre-1 diction is realized or not, tnere win be no greut effort made in France and Belgium till Kitchener's army is entirely landed on the continent, and till all the new big guns and ammunition that Kitchener has ordered are delivered and ready for service. Sending 15,000 Men Daily. That strikes and labor trouble In England have to some extent delayed and hampered the army preparations is not to be doubted. They appear to have been overcome, but basing calculations on the published statement that Great Britian is landing 15,000 men a day in France and has been doing so for a month, it may well be another thirty days before the new armies are in the field. This will be near the end of April, by which time the ground in France and Belgium will probably be dry enough to permit the rapid transportation of heavy artillery, which is another factor of supreme importance In the effort to break through the German lines. For political as well as for sentimental reasons it is certain that France will claim the honor of driving the Germans from her soil, without aid from her allies. So the task of redeeming Belgium will fall to the British army. It may therefore be assumed that two great simultaneous attacks will be made on the German lines, one by the British and Belgians on the left of the long battle line, one by the French at some point on the center or right. It is not likely that these efforts will be made before the end of April or the beginning of May, and if Itay and the Balkan states shall have entered the war they will also launch their attacks at the same moment in unison with great Russian movement in East Prussia, Poland and Hungary. Whatever the tactics in the eastern theatre of war, those along the western front, where the Germans are litterally dug into the earth in one long line of highly fortified trenches stretching from Switzerland to the sea, may be accurately forecasted by what happened the other day at N'euw Chapele, when the British maae me auvoutr buwv battle of the Maroe. Possible Plan of Attack. An enormous mass of heavy artillery will be concentrated us rapidly as possible on the point chosen for the attack. It may be that as many as 2,000 cannon will be used, and in a few hours of sustained bombardment every living thing will be swept from a path several miles in width right through the German lines. Through the opening thus made army after army must be thrown, positions on the flanks must be taken by frontal attack; at all costs the German line must be broken so as to force a strategic retrent. It is the belief of high French and British officers that once the Germans begin to move they will go a long way before they can stop and dig themselves In, but it is known that behind the trenches they now occupy line iff II u u rt MVp after line of secondary trenches have been prepared and the task of breaking through will have to be repeated more than once before the invaders as driven back to the Rhine. Nearly everything depends upon the number of guns and the amount of ammunition that Germany will be able to oppose to the new artillery of the allies. If a commander is willing way is cleared by artillery, there is no to sacrifice enough men and if their position that cannot be taken by infantry charges. IN FAR-AWAY SOLOMON I8LAND Recently Seized From Germany by Australia. Giving a picture of the islands of the Solomon group, which belonged to Germany before the war, but which were captured by the Australians some months ago, a writer for the National Geographic society says: "When a man has learned to live without ambition and to turn his back on hope without regret, then the islands of the South Pacific are ready to receive him as their own. Yet to them turned Germany when its appetite for empire led it forth upon its tedious quest of unclaimed places on the earth. "It therefore happened that at the outbreak of the present war Germany had sovereignty over those two insignificant dots of land upon the endless expanse of the South Pacific, known as Buka and Bourgainville, of the Solomon group. These islands were small, but, nevertheless, were an asset to a nation interested in the far east. "The generation of Germans that followed the empire-builders of 1871 soon felt the need of colonial expansion, hut, when they looked around it seemed that every foot of the earth's worth-while surface had been taken as a colony or a 'sphere of interest.' However, about 1884, the German New Guinea company was formed, and German warships began a careless browsing in the Pacific. "The gunboat Adler took possession of the Solomons on October 30, 1886. A German-English convention in 189? left Germany in possession only of the two most northerly islands in the group. Of these, Bourgainville, the larger, is 126 miles long and between 25 and 50 miles wide. Buka Is about 33 miles long, and between five and ten miles wide. Together their area is about 4,000 square miles. "Both Islands have good harbors, and both are rich in forests and in excellent agricultural soils. In Buka, however, there is a lack of a water supply, while the larger island is crossed by innumerable streams, with their head waters in the interior mountains. The Germans built a government station here in 1907, and since then have made considerable progress in the task of civilizing the natives, who were employed to do all of the improvement work. Up to a few years ago, the male portion of the native population scorned all clothing, while the women considered themselves dressed for every occasion when wearing tiny little aprons, attached to a slender cord around their waist, with possibly, the addition of some stray tattoo marks and a great sunshade made of palm leaves. These natives, also, have adhered with great consistency to cannibalistic traditions. "There was a mere handful of Germans resident in the tiny capital, which was guarded by fifty native police. The islands are but a stone's throw from British possessions in the same group, and but a short sail from Australia. "The climate of the group is that of the tropics, but the water wastes on every hand and the mountainous regions near the coast made these German colonies very habitable for the whites. Mangrove thmickets, sago and cocoanut palms, and valuable woods abound. The natives cultivate yams, taro, unusually delicious bananas, and an atrocius tobacco, the last so bad that not even a European accustomed to his home-grown product can enjoy the Solomon Island smoke. "Every effort was made by the imperial government to encourage the development of plantations here. The soils and climate are admirably adapted to the growing of rubber, cocoa beans and cocoanuts, and much of the German energy was expended in the production of these products. Much was expected by the Germans from n proper development of tropical farming upon these islands, and, small though they were, they were looked upon as important future assets." <XV Sometimes a man longs for tomorrow because he is ashamed of what he didn't do today. Unless you have more dollars than sense do not trouble others to consider your trouble interesting. TRAVE ARE BEING EAGERLY SA SURROUNDING COUNTRY TRAVEL FOR EVERY DOL THE THOMSON COl dry goods, millinery, SHIEDER DRUG STC drugs, medicines, cand1 S. L. STEELEgroceries, fruits, whi' YORKVILLE HARDV shelf and heavy hare LYRIC THEATREmoving pictures?as g< hiiitmii mm ?i mmmmmm m si GENERAL NEWS NOTES. Items of Interest Gathered From All Around the World. Three thousand house painters and decorators of Chicago are on a strike. is to be prosecuted in the Federal court on charges of fraudulent use ol the mails. Three persons were killed and six Injured by the explosion of a benzine tank In a paint factory at Lewiston, Pa.. Thursday. Lima, Peru, was badly damaged by fire Friday. A large portion of the central part of the city was destroyed with a loss of $600,000. The United States government has failed in its recent efforts to gain concessions from Germany in the matter of the embargo on potash. The pontennlnl nllnlverMrV of the birth of Prince von Bismarck, Prussia's famous statesman, was celebrated throughout Germany, Thursday. Governor Hatfield of West Virginia, paroled fifteen prisoners from the state penitentiary, Friday. The criminals ranged from murder downward. Dr. William H. Handle, one of the world's greatest experts in the diagnosis and treatment of yellow fever, is in a critical condition in a Philadelphia hospital. Washington political gossip is tc the elTect that Secretary Bryan will be a candidate for the United States senate from Nebraska, in opposition to Senator Hitchcock. Michael Konopka, a city constable of Oil City, Pa., was murdered in hie bed Friday night, being struck on the head with a blunt instrument while he slept. When 12,000,000 of city school bonds were offered in Philadelphia on April 1st, the issue was quickly taker at $102.59. The issue was overscribed more than seven times. Because of inability to secure dyestuffs from Germany, more than 400,000 workers in the hosiery mills ol the country are facing an early shutdown of the plants in which they art employed. Shipments of parcel post packages containing food, from Chicago tc Germany and Austria, have increased from an average of 116 per day tc 1,200 per day, according to Chlcagc postofflce authorities. A dispatch from Tabriz, Persia, says that in a battle at Atkutur, northwestern Persia, March 25, the Russians defeated the Turks, the lattei losing 12,000 in killed, wounded anc prisoners and many machine guna Robert Smith of Cleveland, whils in Jail as a vagrant at Saginaw, Mich, met Mrs. Grace Steinhauser. He was to have married her Thursday, bu killed her instead. Within 24 hours after the killing, he had begun serv ing a life sentence for his crime. Although the Bethlehem Stee Works at Bethlehem, Pa,, is turninf out 6,000 shrapnel shells a day for th< British eovernment. Lord Kitchenei is urging more speed. The steel com pany has a contract to supply 6,000, 000 shells. The queen of England will presen to her daughter, Princess Mary, 01 her birthday, April 29, a gold brace let, suitably engraved and decorate< In precious stones with the flags o England, France, Russia, Belgium am the United States. Miss Rae Tanzer, the New Yorl girl who entered suit against Jamei W. Osborne, a lawyer, for breach o promise, setting the damage at $60, 000, has withdrawn the suit Shi Is to be prosecuted in the Federa court on charges of fraudulent use o the mails. Chas. A. Teufel, aged 58, died a Milton, Pa., Friday, from the effect of a headuche remedy containini acetanilide. He was addicted t< drugs, and after the Harrison lav became effective, was unable to ge his "dope." He secured a handful o the tablets, gulped them down am died in agony within an hour. Director Porter, head of the Phila delphia police department, has issue< an order to arrest all boys and girl on the streets of the city at night b; themselves after 11 o'clock p. m Director Porter cites figures to shov that three out of every four crimei committed in the larger cities are b: young people under 21 years of age. The stiles of fertilizer tags in Geor gia this year is from 50 to 51 per cen below sales up to April 1st of las year, says an Atlanta dispatch. Th< sales of fertilizer in Mississippi an 30 per cent less than in 1914. Soutl Carolina's tag sales up to April Is totaled $110,031.43, as compared wltl $233,233.74 for the same period oi last year. L SLIPS VED IN YORKVILLK AND YOU GET A MILE IN LAR YOU SPEND WITH UD A VTV TAX /Ail X ? NOTION'S. CLOTHING, SHOES. )RE? 1ES. MAGAZINES, PAINTS, OILS, TK HOUSE COFFEE, TEAS, ETC. ^ARE CO.? IWAHE, KITCHEN WARE, ETC. )OD AS CAN BE SEEN?COME. )in1 ItfB BEgBflaMi in 1 Shine Brines the Smile of Satisfactic . In the "Easy-Opening" Box. . F. DAI.LEY CO., Ltd., BUFFALO, N. Y to Llth, IT CAN BE A SUCCESS OR A FAILURE. WHICH WILL IT BE WITH YOU? ? ? ?????? Look at the men who are successful In the eyes of the world. Ninety-nine out of every hundred started a Bank Account when they were young?and stuck to it. i And now. look at the failures. Very , few of them have a Bank account now. Not speaking of when they were young. Perhaps you think you have not enough money to start an account. Haven't you a dollar? That's all It takes i at THIS BANK. Just try It for a year or six months. If you do not wish to continue it you have lost nothing by the trial. Which Will It Bo?Success or Failure? IT'8 UP TO YOU. I Bank of Hickory Grove 1 HICKORY GROVE. 8. C. i Rebuilt Typewriters?As Good As Evsr?At Enquirer Office. S IT'S NOT WHAT WE I j Our FRIENDS S > Mrs. W. F. JAMES, No. 32 I I that she has been using LUZIANN J in her home. Likes it ABOVE AI FLAVOR, and the SAVING IN M jf goes as far as TWO Pounds of or ! y Cup Quality. ' ? SAVE YOUR LU2 I ? IF YOU want the nice PRESENT > J REILY-TAYLOR CO., at New Or ) ft LOGUE. . | LUZIANNE Is In s I* ? I Rebuilt Tyi ] STANDARD TYPEWR the uniform price of $100.00 E 1 sometimes they can be bought * had it a week it is "second hai * price you paid if you wanted enced Typewriter salesman ca about the little devices that h machine has?point out its coi 1 bon, back spacer, tabulating de 1 that his machine is the only 011 ] ?that is exactly what he is f reasons why you pay $100 for 1 asked to pay this price in orde keting the machine?and of co c imate and part of the business 3 Aside from the pride you mi f model" typewriter with all th< any more REAL TYPEWR] B have had you bought a REBl Machine will not write any h f any easier or anv plainer than to doughnuts that it won't I This being TRUE do you thi New machine at $100.00, whe 3 built Typewriter of exactly tl j saving of from $35.00 to $50.0 t are flush with the coin of the f generous to the Typewriter S 1 Builders and pay them the $10 is perfectly all right and furth ness. But if you are buying a 1 let us urge you to investigate 3 before you buy. Tell us wha 7 to make you a price and then ^ Look these prices over?Thej 3 saving you will make in buyir ' PRICES ARE VERY LOWRemington No. 6, Blind Wi ' Remington No. 10, Visible \ Smith Premier No. 2, Blind j Smith Premier No. 10, Visit j Oliver No. 2, Visible Writer i UIiveriMO. 5, visidic wnwr t Royal Standards No. 5, Visil ? Monarch No. 2, Visible Wri f Underwood No. 4, Visible V Underwood No. 5, Visible V L. C. Smith No. 2, Visible V . L. C. Smith No. 5, Visible V A TYPEWRITER IN YOUI Will prove its value in 1 learn to use it and the knowlei years?your wife can use it fr< ; age?A Smith Premier No. 2, advantages to the beginner, b use of a "shift key" for Capital is a single keyboard, blind wri visible writer?all of these ma reach (see prices above) and The price of Rebuilt Machines Builders' Number?the higher 1 the price?Express Charges, us THINK THE MATTER OV See if you do not think a Ty worth the price?and then see l L. M. GRIST'S S Yorkvilh >dI Quick, Brilliant, ., HAMILTON, CAN. suits From Your Kodak * at Us Oo Your Finishing?Exit Workmanship, Bsst Materials Ordsrs Filled 8am? Day. ENLARGE THE BE8T ONE IN CH ROLL FREE OF CHARGE. ^ Prices are No Higher than you r for the Ordinary Kind. RT NOVELTY CO. 51, COLUMBIA, 8. C. POSITIVELY ONLY FIVE 8UIT8 PER MONTH ALLOWED TO MEMBER8 OF MY PRE88ING CLUB. EXTRA PIECK8 > WILL MEAN EXTRA CHARGE8. 1 nave IIIUVCU 1ujr ncgwumui. aiiu Pressing Club to the Williams A Barnet t Building opposite the Shied er Drug Co., and am better preparsd than ever to serve good meals and lunches. I have secured the services of lir. D. M. Hawkins, an expert presser and cleaner and will guarantee satisfaction in the work of my pressing club. fl^Club members, Again?Only fi/e suits per month allowed members. It. D. DORSETT, Proprietor. IMione 149. Mr* All kinds of Typewriter Ribbons, Carbon Paper, Typewriter Paper, at The Enquirer Office. <ir>sxi?>s<cM>sor>s<ar)M?l ^ SAY THAT COUNTS j| 'peak FOR US. j ^ larris St., Anderson, 8. 0., states A E COFFEE for nearly Five Tears a Aj OTHER8 because of its FINE >. ONEY. A Pound of LUZIANNE X dinary coffee, and gives Perfect f IANNE COUPONS 5 S they entitle you to. Write the J leans, for a PREMIUM CATA- j i Class By ITSELF. | ITERS practically all sell at ach?That's the "list price"? 9 for less?and when you have id" and you could not get the to sell. Of course the experin come along and tell you all >is machine has that no other nveniences?its two color ribvice, etc., and make you think ie to buy. That's his business paid to do?that's one of the a new Typewriter?You are r to help pay the cost of marurse that is all perfectly legit. But where do you come in? ly have in the "very newest j "newest kinks," you haven't ITER value than you would JILT MACHINE. The New arder, any faster, any better, a REBUILT, and it's dollars ok any better to your eye. ink it good business to buy a n you can buy a Factory Re- A ie same make and model at a ? 0 or more? Of course, if you : realm, and want to be real Salesman and the Typewriter 0 anyway, why of course that Jj ermore it is none of our busi- Jm 1 Typewriter for business use, I ! the FACTORY REBUILT \ t you want?We will be glad \ 1 you can decide for yourself. r will give you an idea of the 1 g a REBUILT MACHINE: I iter $19 to $ai I Vriter $43 to $55 I writer 910 w <mu >le Writer $37 to $43 $23 tO $35 $37 to $38 ble Writer $43 to $45 ter $33 to $46 t Writer $38 to $57.50 Writer $41 to $65 Vriter $33 to $45 Writer $48 to $55 ^ J HOME? nany ways?the children can dge will be of value in later equently and to good advantwith double keyboard, has its ecause it doesn't require the letters?the Remington No. 6 ter and the Oliver No. 2, is a chines are easily within your will give entire satisfaction, is governed by the Serial or the Serial Number the higher sually about $1.50?are extra. i?t> % pewriter in your home will be us. ONS, Printers, s, S. C. ftilMlll