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tumorous Jcpartmrat. That Got Him.?A theatrical manager delighted in taking a rise out of conceited or vain members of his company. "I see you are getting on fairly well," he remarked. "Fairly? I am getting on very well," replied the hero of the play, proudly. "I played Hamlet for the first time last night. You can see by the paper's glowing criticisms how *well I aot on." "I have not read them'" replied the other quietly, "but I was there." "Oh, you were. Well, you noticed how swimmingly everything went off? Of course, I made a bungle of one part by falling Into Ophelia's grave, but I think the audience appreciated even that." "I know they did," said the manager with a slight smile; "but they were frightfully sorry when you climbed out of it again!"?Pittsburg Press. Handicapped.?"Sir, I wish to marry your daughter," faltered the young man. "You do, eh?" exclaimed the fond parent. "Well, I have been rather expecting this and to be thoroughly orthodox, I shall put a few questions to you. Do you drink?" "No, sir. I abhor liquor." "You do, eh?' Smoke?" "I never use tobacco in any form." "Well, I didn't suppose you ate it. Do you frequent the race course?" "I never saw a horse race in my sir." "Um-m-m. Play cards for money?" "Emphatically no, sir." "Well, young man, I must say you are heavily handicapped. My daughter is a thoroughly society girl, and I can't for the life of me see what she is going to do with you. However, it's her funeral, ana u sne wants n> undertake the Job she can risk It."? Ttt-Blts. - An Oppressive Ointment,?A Baptist minister of Kansas City tells this incident of services which he conducted in the court house of Stanley county, North Carolina, on the occasion of a visit several years ago. "Uncle Wash" Russell, whose piety and faithfulness no one ever questioned, was a deacon in the church and a leader in the movement to complete the partly finished church building and stop holding services in the county court room. The minister called on Uncle Wash to lead in prayer. What his prayer lacked in elegance is made up with fervency. In it, with the North Carolina pronounclatlon, were these words: "O thou exhaustible God! Ain't this here visitin' brother with the Isle of Patmos?"?Kansas City Times. The Political Millennium.?Two Kansas farmers, one of them a Republican and the other a Democrat, were quarreling over their political beliefs. The more they argued the further o T-?u ft thov drlffert S'lliallv thev Call ed in a neighbor to settle the dispute. This neighbor was a man who seldom said anything; who went about his business; was a good citizen and substantial in every way. "Well," he replied, after each had stated their sides, "my son and I have been hauling wheat nearly forty years now. There are two roads leading to the mill. One is the valley road and the other leads over the hill. But never yet has the miller asked me which road we came. He always asks; 'Is the wheat good?" ?Kansas City Journal. A Case for Sympathy.?Two matrons of a certain western city, whose respective matrimonial ventures did not in the first instance prove altogether satisfactory, met at a woman's club one day, when the first matron remarked: "Hattie, I met your 'ex,' dear old Tom, the day before yesterday. We talked much of you." "Is that so?" asked the other matron. "Did he seem sorry when you J told him of my second marriage?" "Indeed he did and said so most frankly." "Honest?" "Honest! He said he was extreme-I )y sorry, though, he added, he didn't know the man personally."?LJppincott's. Considerate.?Four old Scotchmen, the remnant of a club formed some fifty years ago, were seated around the table In the club room. It was 5 A. M. and Dougal looked across at Donald and said in a thick, sleepy voice: "Donald, d'ye notice what an awfu* peculiar expression there is on Jock's face?" "Aye," says Donald, "I notice that; he's deead! He's been deead these four hours." "What? Dead! Why did ye no tell me?" "Ah, no?no?no," said Donald. "A'm no that kind o' man to disturb a convivial evening."?Tit-Bits. Tit for Tat.?An Irishman was sitting in a depot smoking when a woman came and, sitting down beside him, remarked: "Sir, if you were a gentleman you would not smoke here." "Mum," he said: "If ye wuz a lady ye'd sit farther away." Pretty soon the woman burst out again: "If you were my husband I'd give you poison. "Well, mum," returned the Irishman, as he puffed away at his pipe, "if you wuz me wife I'd take it."? Kansas City Independent. A Wag's Answer.?A sentry while on duty was bitten by a valuable retriever. and drove his bayonet into the dog. Its owner sued him in the county court for its value, and the evidence showed that the soldier had not been badly bitten after all. ' Whydid you not knock the dog with the butt end of your rifle?" asked the judge. The court rocked with laughter when the sentry replied: "Why didn't he bite me with his tail?"? London Daily News. A Delicate Question.?A mother had been telling her little boy the story of Jacob. "In those days, Robbie," she said, "a man sometimes had more than one wife. Jacob worked seven years to get his first wife, Leah, and then after seven more years he married Rachel." "And did they all live together, mamma ?" gttiscrUancous grading. BiTS OF SENTENCES. Humor In the Sermon Text. In a recent address before the London Sunday School Union, Dean Farrar, speaking of ministers who take bits of sentences as texts, told how a distinguished ecclesiastic, lately deceased, had once preached a very famous sermon on the text, "Heat the church." Everybody knows that there is no such text; It Is merely a fragment of a verse. Archbishop Whately remarked: "He might Just as well have chosen 'Hang all the law and the prophets.' " But more curious things than this are on record In the matter of sermon texts. When ladles wore their "topknot" ridiculously high It occurred to Rowland Hill to admonish them from the pulpit, and he did it by men no nf the words. "TODknOt, COme down," which he evolved from Matthew xxlv, 17, "Let him which Is on the house-top not come down." Of course nothing but the exceeding qualntness of the preacher could have excused such a liberty with the sense and sound of the sacred text. It was almost as bad as Swift's uniquely brief discourse on the text, "He that hath pity upon the poor lendeth to the Lord." "My friends," said the dean, as be closed the book, 'If you approve of the security, down with the dust." As a matter of fact. It Is usually only the quaint preachers who do venture on such liberties. Even on the sombre subject of matrimony the clerical humorist has had his Joke In the way of texts. Sometimes, no doubt, the humor has been unconscious, as when the absentminded preacher, forgetting that his congregation were on the tiptoe of expectation in regard to a recent "capture" by one of their lady members, announced as his text, 'Behold! the bridegroom cometh.' But more often the humor, it may be suspected, has oeen lnienuoiuu. ou, ai tui v i aic, u>c young bride must have regarded It when, having extracted a promise of a wedding sermon from her vicar, she heard the text announced, "Yea, an abundance of peace so long as the moon endureth" ? honeymoon, of course! The New England Puritan fathers were espcially good at this kind of thing, partly, no doubt, because they shared to such an extent their domestic Joys and sorrows with the members of their congregation. Parson Turell?of whom Dr. Holmes has written, 'Over at Medford he used to dwell"?had for his first wife a handsome brunette, and the first sermon he preached after his wedding was from the text, "I am black but comely, O ye daughters of Jerusalem." When he married a second time, the bride very nke.iv had the choice of the text, for It was found to be, "He is altogether lovely; this is ray beloved, and this is my friend." Brides really were allowed to select the texts in those days of New England history. Thus, when a certain John Physlck and Mary Prescott were married In Portland In 1770, the lady gave the preacher the following text for the bridal Sunday, "Mary hath chosen that good part" Again, when Abby Smith, daughter of Parson Smith, married Squire John Adams? whom her father disliked so much that he declined having him home to dinner?she chose this text for her wedding sermon, "John came neither eating bread nor drinking water, and ye say he hath a devil." The high-spirited bride, It is interesting to note, had the honor of living to be the wife of one president of the United States and the mother of another. It is Indeed almost incredible what things were done by the New England divines in the way of making their texts suitable for occasions and events. Mrs. Earle tells of a cleric giving out one morning as his text, "Unto us a son is burn," thus notifying a surprised congregation .of an event which they had been awaiting for some weeks. Another preacher from the text, "My servant lieth at home sick," which was literally the case; while atlil another?a cynical bachelor, we may be sure? dared to announce this abbreviated I text, "A wonder was seen in Heaven? a woman." Dr. Mather Byles of Boston, being disappointed through the non-appearance of a minister named Prince, who had been expected to deliver the sermon, himself preached from the text, "Put not your trust in princes." But Dr. Byles was one who would al ways "court a grin when he should win a soul." Texts have often been chosen with the view of conveying a gentle admonition to some one of the preacher's hearers who might be supposed in special need of it. The best story in this connection is perhaps that of the very evangelical old canon who had a son of advanced ritualistic tendencies. In due course the younger cleric obtained a living, and was very anxious that his father should preach in his church. At last, after long delay and much persuasion, the canon consented, and the rector was delighted. His joy was, however, short-lived; for when the old man gave out his text, it ran, "Lord, have mercy upon my son, for he is a lunatic." One minister in a New England community once felt it necessar>- to reprove a money-making parishioner who had stored and was holding in reserve (with the hope of higher prices) a large quantity of corn which was sadly needed for consumption in the town. The parson preach ed from the very appropriate text in Proverbs, "He that withholdeth corn, the people shall curse him." As he grew warmer in his application of the text, he expected to see some signs of penitence in the corndealer; but that worthy only sat up stiff and defiant. At last the preacher could bear It no longer, and roared out, "Colonel IngTaham! Colonel IngTaham! you know I mean you; why don't you hang down your head?" The colonel should have belonged to the congregation of the colored preacher who deplored that he could not say a word to his people about stealing, because "it would throw such a coldness ober de meeting." There is at least one case on record of a man finding a libel in the words of a hymn given out by his minister; and, no doubt, if we had some of the old humorists in the pulpit in these days there would be instances of libel in the sermon-text, too. A clergyman in the west country had two curates, one a comnaratlvelv old man. the other very young. With the former he had not been able to work agreeably; and on being invited to another living, he accepted it, and took the young curate with him. Naturally there was a farewell sermon; and we can imagine the feelings of the curate who was to be left behind when he heard the text given out, "Abide ye here with the ass, and I and the lad will go yonder and worship." Sterne once declared In regard to the widely respected maxim, De mortuis nil nisi bonum, that there was nothing right about It but its Latin. This view was evidently shared by a certain Edinburgh minister, who being asked to preach the funeral sermon of a miserly brother cleric, chose as h'.s text the words, "And the beggar died." He may, however, have done It unwittingly, for many mal-apropos texts are on record. Mr. Spurgeon once warned his students to be very particular in this matter. One brother, he declared, had once preached on the loss of a ship with all hands on board from "So He bringeth them to their desired haven;" while another, returning from his honeymoon trip, took for his text, "The troubles of my heart are enlarged; oh! bring me out of my distresses." These instances of Mr. Spurgeon's can only be capped by the text of the country minister wno naa Deen appuuueu ^na.^laln to a Jail: "I go to prepare a place for you!" There is a story of another chaplain who addresses the prisoners on one occasion from the words, "It is good for us to be here;" but this case wants authentication. Texts can very often be made peculiarly appropriate to the passing circumstances of the time. A year or two ago a minister In the neighborhood of Glasgow, who had been an unsuccessful candidate at the parish council election, took his revenge on the Sunday morning by choosing for his text the words in Job, "No doubt but ye are the people, and wisdom will die with you. But I have understanding as well as you. I am as one mocked of his neighbors: the Just, upright man is laughed to scorn." Any congregation might well be excused for smiling when the fact was recalled that the preacher in his address to the electors asserted that only men of "upright character" should be chosen. The text was excellent, but not quite so pointed as that chosen by the Rev. H. Paul when he was leaving: a church In Ayr, "And they fell upon Paul's neck and kissed him.' When the old "repeating" tunes werb first Introduced they so scandalized many of the clergymen that the latter felt called upon to preach special sermons against the Innovation. One belligerent parson found his text in Amos, "The songs of the temple shall be turned into howling;" while another discovered what he wanted in Acts, "Those that have turned the world upside down are come hither also." There is a very good story told of a certain ancient clergyman who had undertaken a sea voyage for the first time. He was very sick for three days, but he was able to preach on the Sunday; and the worthy man could think of nothing better for a subject than the text from Revelation, "There shall be no more sea." He was thoroughly persuaded that the drying up <w>Mn wan a nnrt nf the heaven ly blessedness to come?for had he not been very sick on the Atlantic! Another clergyman, the Rev. Edward Massey, was persuaded that vaccination was an evil to be denounced from the pulpit. To find a text prohibiting It in Scripture would be a difficulty with most people; but Mr. Massey was like the injudicious cleric of whom It was said that "If there's an ill text In the Bible, that creature Is sure to get hold of it;" and he found his want supplied In these words, "So went Satan forth from the presence of the Lord, and smote Job with sore bolls, from the sole of his foot unto his crown." After this one would like to know what was Coleridge's text when he preached at Shrewdbury to seventeen persons on the hair-powder tax; more especially as the author of the "Ancient Mariner" had afterwards to confess to "a most censurable application of a text from Isaiah" (xvi, 11) in a certain tirade against fast-days. Some preachers of modern times have I oKnwn ko hnm o sormnn mfLV be preached without any text at all; and certainly it would seem as if very little could be made out of some texts which have been -ehe^bn at various times by various divines. Dr. Boyd of St. Andrews tells that he once heard a sermon from the text, "A colt, the foal of an ass;" and it is on record that somebody once discoursed from the words, "And there was much grass in the place." One divine who died some years ago at Wellingborough, had a fancy for texts in which ordinary people would generally fail to see even the elements of a sermon. Thus, one morning he preached from the text, "And he took from the lion's mouth two legs and the part of an ear;" while on another Sunday he discoursed from the words, "Nine-and-twenty knives." Very often, as we all know, the text has only the faintest connection with the sermon; but it is not easv to see how a preacher could "get away" from such texts as these. Now and again, no doubt, the text is everything, the sermon nothing. There is an anecdote of a London bishop who, having read that story of John Wesley cutting out every word of discourse that his servant-maid did not understand, determined to preach to a country congregation the simplest sermon he could write. He chose an elementary subject, and took as his text, "The fool hath said in his heart there is no God." On leaving the church he asked the parish clerk what he thought of the sermon. "Oh, my lord," said he, "it was very fine?very fine and grand. I've been talking it oyer with Mr. Beard, and we said how fine it was. But, after all, we can't help thinking that there is a God." It really does not do for a preacher to forget his audience, or to take much for granted. A young Scottish clergyman, fresh from the class room, was allowed on ono occasion to preach in a certain parish church. Giving out the text, "Who can find a virtuous woman?" he led off with the remark, "Lady Macbeth remains the eternal type of the ambitious female." Afterwards a parishioner inquired, "Who is yon Lady Macbeth?" He had sought her name in all his available works of reference, and not finding it, concluded "She'll be some grand London lady." The Antiquity of the Sausage.?The sausage dates back to the year 897, declares the London Globe. It has been asserted that the Greeks in the days of Homer manufactured sausages, but this prehistoric mixture had nothing in common with our modern product Tho nnripnt sn.rnllpH sniisnare was composed of the same materials which enter Into the make-up of the boudin of the French market and the blood pudding of th<i French-Canadian. The ancient sausage was enveloped In the stomachs of goats. Not until the tenth century did the sausage made of hashed pork become known. It was in or near the year 1500 that, thanks to the introduction into Germany of Cinnamon and saffron, the sausages of ; Frankfort and Strassburg acquired a universal reputation. BUILDING GOOD ROADS. How a New York Paper 8e?s the Interstate Good Roads' Movement. Four newspapers, In New York, Washington, Richmond and Atlanta, have for some months been screaming themselves black in the face over a goods roads' movement throughout the south, with special reference to a highway from New York to Atlanta for automobiles. They have been sending out devil wagons In all directions, and their columns have been largely surrendered to long and enthusiastic accounts of the more or less impracticable roadways and the alleged ecstasies of the natives over the prospect of an early betterment Everywhere the "special commissioners" or "staff correspondents," or whatever the newspapers please to call their respective Wandering Willies, have been received by country mayors, leading tradesmen, and so on. Farmers have "spelled" their teams and looked over fences and cheered on general principles. At last the readers of the newspapers in question know what the residents of the various sections in question have known all the time, that southern roads are not as a rule adapted to tourist automobiles from the north, and the hullabaloo is gradually simmering down. Meanwhile a vast froth and scum has been brought to the surface along the lines that have" been explored. "Leading citizens" are writing to the four newspapers to say that they are heart and soul-for good roads, and village' officials are slowly settling up lor the fried chicken and buttermilk that have been consumed in the excitement. Letters come from Huckleberry Bend, Hog Wallow, Squirrel Ford, etc., to say that the writers are tremendously worked up over good roads and ready to stand by and see them constructed at any cost to somebody else. With one voice they bid the road-builders godspeed, and then get back to their corn pone and yelIato lacrcraH nhtnlron with A qpn.4P Cit having acted very handsomely and liberally toward a projected Improvement in their neighborhood. Nothing could be more encouraging than the public sentiment that has been worked up over the feasts of watermelon and nearbeer that have blossomed along the routes pursued by those ardent pioneers. Everybody In the district is ready for good roads. Everybody Is waiting for the good work to begin. Now that the Junketing and the jubilation are over, however, who is going to build the roads? There has been a whole flood of talk and an air full of interchanging compliment and loving gesticulation, but what individual or what community in the south is going down into the pocket to inaugurate the much lauded enterprise? In nearly all southern neighborhoods the roads are very bad for automobiles, bad even for tde local traffic, not one-half as good as they ought to be, anyhow; but everywhere they are as the people desire or deserve. If the roads around Charlotte and Staunton or around Leesburg and Winchester are comparatively excellent It is because the tax payers of those vicinities will have them so and see their profit in it. If they are bad elsewhere it is because the property hold era ao nut aee ttJiy inuncy m uiaixius them better. Who expects them to rise up as one man all along the line from New York to Jacksonville, via Atlanta, agree upon a continuous scheme for a luxurious highway and pour out their dollars for its construction. If the thing is not done in this fashion, how is it to be done and who is going to do it? Because a corporal's guard of vagrant reporters go bustling about the south dilating on the advantages to somebody of a first-class highway to the far south, are the Joskinses of Virginia, the Carolinas, Georgia and Florida to turn out and pave the way for joy riders from unknown lands? It seems to us on the contrary, that the more these flying prophets talk about the automobiles , to come the more the Joskinses will keep their pockets buttoned and let the automobiles and their various occupants stay at home.?New York Sun. SOME DONT'S OF CRIME. Black Men Don't Pick Pockets; Yellow Don't Molest White. The collection of photographs? commonly called the Rogue's Gallery ?at police headquarters is remarkable for the number of races which are represented therein. It has been said that of all the cities of the world Paris is the only one which has a collection so comprehensive in the matter of nationalities. The London gallery Is not comparable with either the New York or the French, except in the matter of number of pictures and the variety of crimes chargeable against the men and women whose likenesses are on tile. About the only foreigners represented in the Scotland yard collection are European and Americans and of those many are strangers to the London police, who are indebted to the continental and American authorities for the photographs and records of criminals that never set foot upon English soil. Paris is the headquarters of all sorts of continental rogues and the police of that city have had unusual opportunities for getting together their photographs and thumb prints. In New York the criminal population is ever changing and it is not too much to say that there is no country of importance in all the world which is not represented in the cabinets wherein are arranged for "ready reference" likenesses of men from the four quarters, and the middles as well, of this wicked world. Every once in a while there will be arrested a man whose nationality is not known to any of the polyglot members of the local detective bureau and more than once a criminal has been sent "up" under a name palpably not his true one, for the reason that the culprit refused to disclose j his actual antecedents. This is a source of trouble to the keeper of the records, who are loth to fill in the de- ' scriptive blank with "Nationality? Unknown." But there are times when there is nothing else to do. Within the last few years the Italians have been the most highly civil- 1 ized nationality to contribute the outcast of their population to this procession of criminals recorded in New York. The offenses are, in many cases, of the most brutal kind associated with the primal passion. Certain offenses against the moral laws were rarely heard of here until the Sicilians began to come over in numbers. | Now, after experience of them, the po- j lice, on hearing of these particular , crimes, turn to the Sicilian with as much confidence as the French by their own proverb "look for the woman." Only a year or so ago New York was in an angry mood because of the frequence of offense against girls. That form of crime has been suppressed, for the time, but it is not to be believed that it will not break out when circumstances are favorable?that is to say, when the Italian detectives delay tneir vigilance. Ana to these members of the police force ?the Italian detectives?the people of New York owe more than they surmise. One of the difficulties with which the Italian detectives have had to contend was the incompleteness of the gallery so far as concerned likenesses of criminals, known as such or merely suspected, when a crime was committed. It happens now and again that a detective will "get a tip" from an Italian. The informant writes to the manager of the bureau telling of a countryman whose career at home was such that he was forced to get out of the way. The informant tells something of what he knows about the man whom he suspects. He cannot, or will not, give more than the vaguest description of him. Upon this clue the detective sets out to search among half a million men for one who may fit the meager description sent in by his anonymous correspondent. Days, weeks, months, may be wasted In this way. Perhaps the man is found. He goes to court upon a charge of purely technical kind. He is promptly acquitted. There is no photograph of him. The fellow is free as a bird. Suppose he is arrested soon afterward on suspicion. This being a second arrest he is "mugged." Now he does not feel so secure. He may get into trouble again?probably will do so. The records show that he was arrested and discharged once before. XJ.io In urvnr toilet tHo mfldiltrfllA it*R I all the people. "They have got nothing 'on' my client. They are bounding him and want to drive him out of the city, for no other reason than because he will not submit to imposition by the so-called guardians of the peace." Police riagistrates are proverbially tender-hearted. The man is set free again. What is worse for the community, his picture must now be taken from the gallery. But the suspect is at this stage known by sight to many of the detectives. He knows that he is watched. Sooner or later he will leave New York, or, taking a desperate chance, do something which will enable the police to get him right." Then he "gets what's coming to him." But see how much time has been lost and how many crimes he may have committed because there was no means of introducing him to the men of the bureau. While all this is true, particularly as to the Italians, it is equally, if in a minor degree, true of members of other foreign criminal classes whose headquarters are right here in New York. "Better that a thousand guilty men escape that no one innocent man suffer?" Not a working theory In a population such as this one, so the police believe. While there are "bad" men of every race, there are certain forms of crime which seem to be specialized, so to say. Take the Japanese. Most of them whose photographs adorn the gallery are or were dishonest servants. If Greeks and Armenians "go wrong, they "run to robbing hotels in which they are employed as bellboys and the like. The Slavs have a bad reputation among the police, and there are a good many of their pictures in the gallery. They are all-around "bad men." A recent popular protest was made in behalf of another section. The Turks, so far as the /jallery goes to show, take with a light hoart to burglary. They are a husky lot and are not balked by trifles. Against the negro the gallery shows many kinds of crime charged and proved. The women criminals cause a deal of trouble to white men who, feeling themselves far from home, undertake to lead disreputable lives while visiting the metropolis. There are a score or more of negresses who are known to every detective in town as "bad ones." They "bank" upon a victim's dread of publicity, and the records show that they "bank" well. Seldom In the court will a victim appear against one of these harpies. As for the negro men criminals, they do not pick pockets. That is about all that may be said in their favor. The Chinese as everybody knows, prey, upon their own race. It is a fair inference that when a white man or a negro and a Chinese get into trouble, the Oriental is not the aggressor. Opium smoking and the sequestration of white women who were procured for them, nine times in ten, by white men or women, are the "Chink's" chief offense against the law. When a Chinese commits murder the chances are that the victim, if white, gave such provocation as would have led to the same result had the quarrel been between whites. When a Chinese kills one of his own countrymen it is next to impossible to learn the reason which led to the commission of the crime. I?i f ho o-tillorv th?i*o ?rp nlftlll'PS (if Chinese whose benignity of countenance would suggest dorsal feathers. On the other hand, there are some "tough mugs" among them. Without the pictures there would be no holding in check of the criminally disposed. The more pictures there are the less difficulty in "finding a man." Criminals don't like to be found.? New York Evening Sun. Automatic Telephone Exchange.? According to the head of Austria's telegraphs, the automatic telephone exchange system can be made to compete seriously with the manual sys uqvj thft fhlno?n VflWJ Hh that In New York It takes on the average sixteen seconds from the time the subscriber removes his telephone receiver to the time the ringing signal Is set; whereas in the automatic system installed in Vienna for 100,000 subscribers this work is done in but ten seconds. Three seconds after the subscriber hangs up the receiver the line is clear. Owing to this saving in time a larger number of messages can 3e delivered through the automatic sxchange *han through the manual exXt'/' *if the shoe fits, wear it," is a time-worn saying, but with a woman f the shoe fits she takes it back bemuse it is too big. SHAKESPEARE'S LAW. Citation* to Show That Ha Was In th* Fashion of His Time. No ordinary reader of Shakespeare's works can fall to be struck by the copious ar.d ever recurring legal phraseology with which they are filled. Not only are law terms frequently employed with an almost professional correctness to give color and intensity to his sentences, but whole scenes are taken up with allusions to or discussions on purely legal matters, as In "The Merchant of Venice," ["Henry V." and the grave scene of "Hamlet," not to mention other plays. So profound indeed is the knowledge displayed all through that no less an authority than Lord Campbell has told us that "to Shakespeare's law, lavishly as he propounds It, there can neither be demurrer nor bill of exceptions nor writ of error." To this marked feature of the works more than to any other one might perhaps with Justice attribute the very origin of the whole Baconian theory. The nnln) la natnrnllv nf evtreme Imnnrt I""'" ?* ?J ? ? ance In the eyes of those whose only knowledge of the literature of the period is confined to Shakespeare's writings. But that importance shrinks rapidly to insignificance after a course of reading through the general dramatic literature of the time, In which, as a matter of fact, legal similes and allusions are found to occur with about the same frequency as In Shakespeare's works. So strong Indeed is the legal coloring of all stage writing ^at the time that one is forced to believe that law talk must have been more common among laymen In those days and especially among laymen of a playgolng disposition than it has ever been during any period since. There are Indications besides that ' some critics were getting tired of all this legal jargon, Dekker, for Instance. who writes: "There is another ordinary at which your London usurer, your stale bachelor and your thrifty attorney do resort?the price, three-pence; the rooms as full of company as a jail. If they chance to discourse It is of nothing but statutes, bonds, recognizances, fines, recoveries, audits, rents, subsidies, sureties, inclosures, liveries, Indictments, outlawries, feoffments, judgments, commissions, bankrupts, amercements and of such horrible matter."?Gull's Horn Book, 1609. Tourneur also: There are old men at the present That are so poison'd with th' affection Of law words, having had many suits canvass'd, X UcLL LIICJI CVlllIIIUlI lain. IB ii'/iiiiiiq wuw barb'rous Latin. They cannot so much as pray, ubt In law, that their sins may be remov'd with A writ of eror and their souls fetch'd up To heaven with a certiorari. ?Revenger's Tragedy. There is therefore no more difficulty in Shakespeare's case touching his knowledge of law than in the case of any other playwright of his age.? Nineteenth Century. XT You can't convince a man he is getting bald till every one else has known It at least three years. XT The man who makes the longest prayers is frequently short when the collection plate is passed. IT T'S A GOOD PLAN TO ;| visit all the salesrooms I available and not decide I which piano to buy until you have seen them all. We'll take our chance then on your buying a Ij UC11 The Best Piano to be had for as little money as a good Piano can be sold. Direct from maker to user, without agent's or j middleman's profit. Every cent of the price you pay is accounted for in the instrument itself. CHAS. M. STIEFF ' i Manufacturer of the ? Artistic Stieff, Shaw, and Stieff Self-player Pianos c SOUTHERN WAREROOM. J 5 W. Trade St. " (CHARLOTTE N. C. | " C. H. WILMOTH, I j Manager. I ^^Mentloi^hlsu?aper^^^^^| jj (hicora j j GREENVILLE, - - - S. C. i 71 THE j SOUTH 1 CAROLINA 5 PRESBYTERIAN COLLEGE | FOR WOMEN A Christian Home School. L A High Standard College. A. Tuition, Board, Room and d Fees $183.00. A B. All Included in proposl- ? tlon (A) and Tuition in Music, f Art or Expression $203 to $213. 2 S. C. BYRD, D. D., Pres. * / Fabrics an J by removing the ii M water and strong soap ? anything better and e J? rubbing is unnecessary. f licipiui l.lC<Ui3IUg JAJWUC1 f Lava I "It Softens (Lavadura makes it easy to i without shrinking and colored goc dishwater and vour hands won't ^ dishes will be cleaned sweet and bri Lavadura is fine, too, for bath shampoo. Destroys perspiration < and dandruff. Delightfully refresl LAVADURA CHEMIOt YWPR An invite owners of cylii Columbia We could argue tl Indestructible Cylind from now?but wha you could not prove it into our store and 86 We could print a wl day about the special bia processes of mam where at all if the Rc evidence. COLL INDESTRUCTIE REC< won't break, no matter h< they won't wear out, no 1 played. Moreover, their more brilliant than tha record made. Don't met twine insiac our store anc I CARROLL FURNITURE 1 A PHOTOGBAPHIC STUDIO. During the summer months and unit further notice, the office hours of rhe Lindsay Studio Willi be from 9 a. n. to 2 p. m. Studio will be open ev:ry day during these hours. Phone 132. CLOTHES CLEANING. 1AM prepared to clean gentlemen's clothes and ladles' skirts In a thor-w. 1.1., .oHahntnni manner at rAR. onable prices. Work may be sent dlect to my home or left at W. EL Ferguson's store. Mrs R. B. MeCLAIN. I TYPEWRI' I SUPPLI i ST^ ! RIBBONS, CARBO I FOLD PAPER, M ERS PAPER F; I Everything in 1 I We are carrying in stock C > SON'S (for different machines) ( WRITER PAPERS of various kin ) the same as desired, in different si I In any quantity, j We also handle TYPEWRI' , desired in NEW OR REBUILT M i L. M. GRIS ? es DeUcate^'^X d Delicate Hands \ ijurious influences of hard 1 s. Makes any water cleanse \ aster, so that wear-and-tear 1 The most harmless, most ^ ever known? 1% dura J ' the Water" rash woolen goods soft like new 1 >ds without fading. Use it in the I ret so red and rough?end all the I ght with half the work. 9 and . fm-Jtmt 4 xion j mrndDrmffittm. *1 L f mfWm M IrC* E ling. rnfkngtt I JLCO, " * OVE IT! ition to all ider machines? and others. ie quality cf Columbia % er Records until a year i. --U -*i. J* I &UUU WUU1U 11 uu u for yourself by coming eing and hearing it? f lole newspaper every and original Columufacture?and get noicords did not tear the \ FMBIA . ILC CYLINDER DRDS ow roughly they are used, natter how often they are tone is far purer, clearer, t of any other cylinder ely take our word for it? 1 listen.Cost 35 cents! CO., Yorkville, S. C. Br " AT THE BRATTOM FAK11 WE are offering thoroughtr-d Guernsey Heifers at troji 10 up and we have also a number of Berkshire Gilts with thoroughr.rud Mgs that we will sell. Will deliver pure, clean milk at 10 cents a quart Cream, butter and fresh ergs on orders. Pure Berkshire Pigs at from $3 to 35 each. Pure Buff Orpington eggs at 31 a setting of 16. J. MEEK BURNS. Manager. WT Woodmen of the World Monthly Receipt Books at The Enquirer Office. ... * rER ES AND LTIONERY ) "PER, MANI- I * ANUSCRIPT COV- I VSTENERS. ::::: f Reliable Goods. j OLUMBIA TYPEWRITER RIB' ^ AND CARBONS, and TYPE- j> ids and weights, and can furnish a zes, PRINTED OR UNPRINTED 5 i * TERS, and can furnish anything K ACHINES on short notice. a its sons. j .