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luimovoHS Department. Bringing Him to Taw.?Two men we restanding at the gate of a country farm yard whittling sticks and giviug each other dots about managing women. "Talk sassy to 'em," the man on the outside of the fence said, "and ye'll see how they'll be fetched down." Just then the cabin door opened, and a red-headed, long-necked woman yelled: "Say, Zeke, ther Hour's out!" "Out whar?" he yelled back. "Outen the bar'l," she answered. "Wall, put it back an' cover it up tight," he replied, while the outside man grinned. "Don't you see how she's hacked a' ready ?" he laughed, when the fiery top-knot disappeared. "I does," spoke the elated victor. Presently the same shrill voice cried : "Zeke, I's guine over to mar's, an' ef ye think ther measles air ketchin', I'll leave tber baby byar." "Dunno whether they's ketchen' er not," replied the husband. "I've never seed 'era ketch enything." Again the head was drawn back, amid applause from the outside. The next time the door opened the muzzle of a shot gun was poked out, and a bead drawn ou the saucy man. "Zeke," came the solemn voice. "Melindy," he gasped, looking in vain for some place to dodge. "Zeke," she continued, "thei hour's out." "All rite; I'm off ter the mill at once," he answered shiveringly. "Zeke, I'm guine over to mar's fer a spell; d'ye think the measles is ketchiu"?" "No, Melindy; seed pap ter day, an' he sed the cbillun wuz well." "Kerrect," she said, lowering the gun, "I'm off. Ye can sorter clean up the place till I git back ; be shore ter stay inside while I'm gone." >"A11 rite," he answered meekly, moving aside to.let her pass. Upheld His Reputation.?We generally find that a person who brags is usually a coward, but in this case the old mau upheld his reputation. An old cobbler in Amity street, who was largely patronized by the young bloods, once j boasted that nothing was capable of frightening him. Two young men once deter-1 Tnined to put his courage to the test. One of j them pretended to be dead, while the other) went to the cobbler and asked him to sit up all night with the corpse. The old mau, who had some pressing work in hand which had to be delivered next morning, took his leather and his tools with him, sat down near the supposed dead body, and set about his task. At midnight they brought him a cup of cafenoir to keep him awake, which he gratefully j partook of, and then immediately resumed his work. The coffee, however, put him into such a happy frame of mind that, entirely forgetting the presence of the corpse, he struck up a lively song, beating time all the while with his hammer on the lapstone. Suddenly the imaginary corpse raised itself into a sitting posture, and exclaimed, in a hollow voice "People ought not to sing when keeping watch over a deathbed." The cobbler shook his head, gave the young man a smart rap, and said : "People shouldn't talk when they are dead." This was the last time anybody tried to frighten the old cobbler. He Wouldn't Stand Any More Kissing of Maria.?A good many male friends of Bill Chinks attended his wedding, which took place in a room of the bride's parents' Residence in the couutry a few evenings ago. After the minister had finished the ceremony, Bill, without moving from his position, said : "Now, Mr. Preacher, what is your charge fur spliciu' us?" "Oh, well, just what you feel like giving." "Wall, I feel like givin' a good deal, for it war a good job. But here's a quarter, which is all I've got." "Very well, sir, I can't take more than is given me." And then Bill, tuking hold of his bride's right hand with his left turned to the crowd and said : "Now, gentlemen, I don't know but what all of you fellers may hev had a whack at kissin' Mariar afore she wus married, but now this 'ere gal's my property. I've paid fur her and she's mine; and the first fellow I ketch or hear of kissin' her again, I'll whale. Them's my terms. Now let the fiddler tune up his vierlin." BST" A Scotch paper tells of a farmer's wife who had a great deal of trouble with her servants. The other day one of them came to her to say, "Madam, I fear I shall not be able to work much longer. I think I am going blind." "Why, how is that? You seem to get along pretty well with your work." "Yes; but I can no longer see any meat on my plate at dinner." The farmer's wife understood, and the next day the servants were served with very large and very thin pieces of meat. "How nice!" the girl exclaimed ; "my sight has come back. I can see better than ever." "How is that, Bella?" asked the mistress. "Why, at this moment," replied Bella, "I can see the plate through the meat." Said the wise man, "A soft answer turneth away wrath." A lady who believed in this precept said to her four-year-old Nellie, who is somewhat quick-tempered, "If one of your playmates speaks rudely to you, return a soft answer." "Soft?" "Yes. Now run along and play ; mamma is busy." The child went out on the lawn, where a neighbor's boy was mending a kite. She accidentally broke the kite still more, whereby the boy was made angry. "I don't like you; you're a horrid thing!" he said. Little Nellie's eyes flashed, and she was about to reply with a very unkind remark, when, suddenly recalling her mother's advice about a soft answer, she looked the boy right in the eye, and said, meekly and slowly, "iMusn." One Flesh.?Doctor?Have you got better of the ague yet? Patient?No, sor; me and my wife is as bad as iver, sor. Doctor?Did you get t he whisky and quinine I prescribed? Patient?Yes, sor; but it did no good at all, at all. Doctor?That is strange. You took it according to directions, I suppose? Patient?Yis, sor; you know a man and his wife are one. Doctor?What has that to do with it ? Patient?Well, ye see, sor, bein' as we are one flesh, I tuk the whisky and gave Biddy the quinine. It Was All Bioht.?(Jrooin?What are you doing, my love? Pride?Making out a list of flower seed which I want you to order for our little garden. "Oh, yes; so I see: but, my love, you want the flowers to bloom this summer, don't you ?" "Why, of course." "Well, those you have put down do not bloom until the second season." "Oh ! that is all right." "All right?" "Yes; I am getting the list from a last year's catalogue." A New York Sunday school teacher told her pupils that when they put their pennies into the contribution box she wanted each one to repeat a Pible verse suitable for the occasion. The first dropped in his cent, saying : "The Lord loveth a cheerful giver." The next boy dropped his penny intoj the box, saying: "He that giveth to the poor lendeth to the Lord." The third and youngest boy dropped in his penny, saying: "A fool and his money are soon parted." flS?" Tom Ochiltree is fond of telling stories about his ocean trips. "I was coming across, and a very good sort of a Britisher used to sit with me in the smoking-room. I tried all my best jokes on him, and he never cracked a smile. At last I got angry, and I said, 'I don't think an Englishman could see a joke if you fired it at him out of a gun.' And then that blessed Englishman stood up on his hind legs, and said, 'How can you fire a joke out of a gun?'" m- Mrs. Y oungwife?A friend has sent me a basket of quinces, and I don't know how to use them. Mrs. Old wife?Nothing is simpler. Pare and core them, make preserves of the best pieces, marmalade of the others, and jelly of the cores and peelings. "Well, I declare. And what shall I make of the basket they came in?" ! ItoBSitlc Gatherings. " - r r; ..... :. . I B&F A Gatling-gun fires five thousand shots a minute. Bar When a habit does you no harm it is i not a sin. Wheels go best when they are thor- \ oughly tired. ! < BST If poverty is a crime, wealth must be ? ! a capital offense. < ; ftST" To be idle and to be poor have always j ! been reproaches. fgST The price of parrots in South America . is only ten cents each. #5TThe golden-crested wren is the small- j j est bird in the world. , &3P The Mohammedan year is eleven days shorter than the Christian. 86T While one is studying he should not 1 forget to do some thinking. 1 fiGood manners and good morals are s sworn friends and fast allies. ; V8T An inch of rain means one hundred 1 tons of water on every acre. 8*aT Fewer suicides occur in Ireland than \ in any other country in Europe. j 66?" Time never fails to bring every exalt- , ed reputation to a strict scrutiny. ( SOT Postal cards use up 721 tons of cardboard every year in this country. ?. \ Va.i. Vai*L" Alt If 142 All'n. HK.V VIie-Ciyin.il U1 1 um V1VJ 10 VMU ed by 117 individuals and estates, flgy Every year the population of the Uni- ' ted States is increased by 1,000,000. * I 8gy The Egyptian is taxed 50 cents on the i palm trees that grow iu his garden. I 8gy Farms for the propagation of frogs are J common in the Chesapeake regiou. j 8gy A Pittsburg small boy once described 1 a screw as "a nail with ruffles on it." Bgy Christmas and the Fourth of July are | alike legal in all the States and territories. ( 8gy The engines of a first-class man-of-war j cost nearly seven hundred thousand dollars, ?ay The United States has 46,000 oil wells, which produce 130,000 barrels of oil a day. j 8?" What question is that to which you 1 must answer yes? What does Y-E-S spell? ( 80T Confidence is a good thing to have, but 1 it is best not to share it with too many persons. t If the mind makes the body rich, we ] know now why some men are so infernally | poor. 8gy More people are poor on account of ( bad management than on account of extravagance. i ' Bgy Figures show that ninety-one out of ' every hundred farmers in Utah own their ' homes. I 8gy The man who works his way through : college Is the man who makes his way in the < world. , ?aT" The fruit crop of this country, mostly j devoured at home, is valued at $210,000,000 ] a year. 8?" I)o not wait till tomorrow, but begin . today to discharge every known duty, great and small. i BQyThe people of the United States are ! the greatest wearers of gloves of any nation i in the world. SSy Think all you can of the good qualities of others; forget and keep silent concerning . their bad qualities. 8?y The largest creamery in the world is said to be at St. Albans, Yt. Capacity, 22,- ! 000 pounds daily. ' figy The total value of the war material of ' the Freuch army amounts to nearly live ! huudred million dollars. ' 8gy There are over 60,000 cocoanut trees i in Florida, and their fruit is nearly all sent i to the New York market. , 8Sy Moss grows thickest on the north side ( of hills, and a sun-exposed tree has its larg- , pst. limbs on the south side. S?y Professor Vambery estimates that the English language is spoken by 110 less than one hundred and thirty millions. Tomorrow is the day on which all the drunkards mean to reform, the idlers go to work and the sinners to repent. The most indestructible wood is the jarrah wood of Western Australia, which ] defies all known forms of decay. Sgy Every man must be governed by his , own conscience, but has 110 right to make his conscience a tyrant to control others. B3F A modern philosopher says: "Experience would be a splendid commodity if it 1 could only be sold out for what it cost." ' Full weather forecasts are now re- 1 ceived at 1622 stations in the United States, 1 while over 5,000 places receive them gratui- , tously. ( 6?? Nearly 10 per cent, of the yield from , this year's cotton crop in the South is from cottonseed oil, once thrown aside as useless refuse. The annual value of the clothing made in the United States and Europe is estimated at two billion two hundred and five million < dollars. I B3P" Radicalism hates everything that is j old ; fogvism hates everything that is new ; ( conservatism looks at the intrinsic qualities of things. fifciy Sincerity is speaking as we think, believing as we pretend, acting as we profess, 1 performing as we promise, and being as we ' appear to be. fSSr An enterprising daily paper recently I announced that a well-known actress had < "married her uncle." What the editor wrote , was "sprained her ankle." ?Say The farther north, the more, injurious to the human system is*the use of coffee, (ireenlanders have found it necessary to ' prohibit its use by the young. ftsT" First Roy?"My father has a felon on ! his finger as large as a walnut." Second Roy?"IIuli ! that's nothin'. My father's been a felon himself for the last five years." fifcaT A whale, recently captured in Arctic , waters, was found to have imbedded in its side a harpoon that belonged to a whaling vessel that had been out of service nearly half a century. Sidy "Kind sir, pray give me a shilling for my six hungry children." "Awfully sorry, hut I'm not buying hungry children just now ; fact is, I've got nine of my own at home already." 8?r The Hawaiian race has been steadily I dwindling in numbers during the present j century, and the latest census gives it a pop I illation ot Dill -10,000, or a decrease ui one-1 half within half a century, j ?eir Take time; is 110 use to fume or fret or j (to as the angry housekeeper who has got j hold of the wrong key and pushes, shakes j and rattles it about the lock until both are i broken and the door is still unopened. The khedivc of Egypt has presented : I the National Museum in Washington with seven mummies, all covered with the queer! i inscriptions such as the ancient Egyptians! were wont to use to convey their ideas. , Europe appears to be experiencing the , I most severe winter weather that has been j known there in many years. The cold isi j almost unprecedented in its intensity and in 1 the enormous area over which it prevails. &3T "Why are you so naughty, Johnny ? It j I seems to me that, with mamma worn out and . papa with a broken arm, you might try to | j be good." '"Oh," said Johnny, "that's just! 1 the time to be bad. No one can lick me." BaT" It is recalled that the late General | lieauregard built the first cable railroad in ! this country. The road was constructed just ! after the war, and extended from the city of; . New Orleans to the suburb of Carrollton. , Bfcgr Edward Ever ett Hale once said to a] , friend, "Never bear more than one kind of j trouble at a time," and added : "Some poo- j ! pie bear three kinds?all they have had, all 1 j they have now, and all they expect to have."! fUdf A schoolteacher, who had been telling the story of David, ended with, "And all this happened over three thousand years! I ago.'' A little cherub, its blue eyes open ing wide with wonder, said, after a moment's , , thought, "Oh, dear, what a memory you ; have got!" fra?" Pennsylvania produces nearly 2,000,000 tons of iron in the anthracite furnaces, i , nearly 3.000,000in bituminous furnaces, and ! 17,000 tons of charcoal iron. Over 02S,000,000 tons of anthracite coal have been mined in the State, and one oil field has yielded | 100,000,000 barrels. 6kiT There is a justice of the peace in Smith | county, Kansas, who has a marriage service ; all his own. He concludes in this wise:; "What this court has put together let no. ! .... ?^..f ..Min.ln. , 01, II'.I,. l>)l!l(lrill) t(l ! Ill il II |mt UdUllVIVl . OUUVi MVUV ?W , come unto you. so help you God." S8T t Jrog, a mixture of spirits and water, was so called from Admiral Vernon, a distin-' I guished British sailor. He always wore a1; grogram coat, and was called "Old Grog" !< by liis sailors. He introduced the ration of | spirits into the navy bill of fare, and the , j mixture at once received his nickname. She .farm and fireside. C'OXm'CTKD BV KOAVIiAXl) IILACK. [Original.] THE NECESSITY FOR IMPROVED METHODS. Within the past few decades, wonderful changes have been wrought in every brand: jf industry. It lias been an outgrowth o: conditions that have worked a radical change mil advancement in every line of business Chief of the factors has been the invention ind introduction of labor-saving machinery ind tools, as well as all kinds of devices foi lessening the manual labor to be performed. The factories, with their steam and electric power, have revolutionized the centres ol industry, and have not only increased the productive power of labor, but have, at the same time, increased the number of laborers ind drawn them into these centers, or towns. From the country. The consequent great growth of the cities md towns, at the expense of the country, is a distinguishing feature of the times, and zach succeeding census shows that the flow 3? the tide from the rural districts to these manufacturing centers, are growing in volume and velocity. If it had not been for the use of improved methods aud labor-saving machinery in the ijreat food producing sections of the West ind Northwest, the laborers remaining on the farms could never have fed themselves ind this great army of people congregated iu the towns. The New England States have been driven by this competition of the Northwest and West, into dairy, truck and fruit fanning, to supply the numerous large towns that have grown up under this change n that section. In the meantime, what tiave we of the South, standing off, isolated is it were, and taking no part in this great ndustrial revolution that has been going m north, cast and west of us, accomplished ? If any of our forefathers, who died a quar;cr of a century ago, could arise from his ong sleep and look about him, he could detect no advancement in our methods and tint few improved implements, lie would Ind us all engbged in growing the same jrops with the same clumsy and primitive iools, and marketing them in the same haphazard way. It needs no argument to show that, as a class, we farmers are not progressive. We arc not keeping up with the profession, either with the farmers of othei sections of the country, or of those engaged In other pursuits. We arc not only badly behind in the use of improved implements, doing everything by the main strength and Negro awkwardness, but we are extravagant beyond reason. As some one has well said, we buy more than we produce. There is too much bacon and flour shipped here. We let our timber rot or burn it in heaps xnd buy our wagons, plowstoeks, singletrees ixe bundles, hoc handles, and even oui fencing. We throw away onrushes and soaf grease, and buy soap and axle-grease. Wi give away our beel" hides and buy our shoes liarness and hame strings, and even oui shoe strings. We let our manure go tc waste and buy guano. We buy garden seed in the spring and cabbage and potatoes in the winter. We let our land grow up ii sedge and buy our brooms. We let the was 3ut of our pine and gum trees go to waste and buy chewing gum for our children. Wc send a fifteen cents boy out with a $20 gun and a $10 dog to kill birds. We raise dogs and buy woolen goods. After doing all these things every day of our life, and real izing that we are behind and unprosperous we do not seem to understand the cause of it But the demagogue who has been a failure himself and is hungry for an office, come.' along and takes us to his bosom and tells in that the cause of all our trouble is to b( found in the policy of our government; thai the financial system is all wrong; that the other fellows arc all corrupt and ringsters o the worst type ; that if you will elect him tc office lie will straighten thiugsupand everybody will be happy and prosperous ; and wc are prone to believe them and put them ir office, and sit down and wait for prosperity and lo ! it does not come. And so it always will be until we change our methods. Under the new conditions old methods will 110 longer avail, and old tools must give way to improved implements. The low prices of all farm products and the sharp competi tiou is forcing every branch of farming, as ii is in every other pursuit, into the most rigid economy*, combined with the most intelligent enterprise and painstaking care. The man who succeeds today in the busi aess of farming, must avail himself of the best that is known in everything that pertains to his pursuit. To be successful ii farming, as we have many times before observed in this column, a man must read and think, and do everything in the best possible manner, with a due regard to economy and with the greatest care and attention to every detail. The day is past when we can send a Negri to the field to use his own judgment, oi ? 1- i* * rauier iuck ui juugnu-iu, nuuu ?>e n town to discuss politics and while away our time, and expect to become prosperous bj any change that our lawmakers, State 01 national, may make in our laws. Thk Food Vai.I'H of an Ecu.? Six largt eggs will weigh about a pound. As a llcsl producer, one pound of is equal to out pound of beef. About one-third of tin weight of an egg is solid nutriment, wliicl is more than can he said of meat. Then are no hones and tough pieces that have tc he laid aside. Practically, an egg is anima food ; and yet there is none of the disagree able work of the butcher necessary to oh tain it. Eggs at average prices are anion; the cheapest and most nutritious articles o diet. Like milk, an egg is complete food ii itself, containing everything that is neees sary for the development of a perfect animal It is also easily digested, if not damaged ii cooking. Indeed, there is no more eoncen trated or nourishing food than eggs. Tin albumen, oil and saline matter, are as ii: milk, in the right proportion for sustaiuin; animal life. The valuable or important salts are contained in the yolk, and lionet this portion of the egg is most useful ii some forms of disease. A weakly person ii whom nerve force is deficient and the bloot impoverished, may take the yolk of an eg< with advantage. The iron and the plios phoric compounds are in a condition to la easily assimilated, and, although honiu'o pathic in quantity, nevertheless exert i marked inlluenceon the system. The yolk; of eggs, containing, as they do, less albu men, are not so injuriously affected by heat as the whites; and a hard-boiled yoke may hi usually eaten by invalids without inconvc nience.?Health. - ?sif "I've had some experience with cattle,' said a sportsman, "and several times 1 liavi been chased by ugly hulls, hut I have no feai of them now. I find that when a hull dis putes your path, or begins to paw and get his mad up, you can always drive him awaj by getting the biggest stone you can handle and letting liitn have it in the ribs or on tlu head : only he prompt about it and don'i wait for him to charge." IYmtkix I'ii:.?rare tin- pumpkin and cook in but little water, so that when (lorn it can be sifted quite dry. Add sugar t( taste, one egg for each pie, and milk cnougl: to make of required stillness. A tablespoon ful or two of cream to each pie is an im provement. Flavor with nutmeg, cinnamon and a little ginger. Have ready a nice crust made light with a little baking powder Bake well in deep perforated tin plates. Tiik Bauy's Bath.?A trained nurse makes the suggestion that it is wise, in bathing very young babies, to wrap them in 11 thin llannel towel at the moment of immersion, slipping it oil' when the baby has become accustomed to the water. This will prevent what is always a slight shock tc young infants?the first contact with the bath. .1 <Htr ?torit (Tdlrt. i - _ j EVADING THE REVENUE. WOMEN AND THK CUSTOM OFFICK. I The reading public is no doubt aware that i tbc United States customs department emf ploys women at several ports of entry, but ' probably the particular duties and experi ences of these female officials arc known to i but few. It is a peculiar position for a wo' man, requiring, as it does, the shrewdness of ' a detective, the legal knowledge of a lawyer, the courage and nerve of a naval captain, ; while the manners of a lady must be retained, f While it is a feminine office, its incumbent ' must not be effeminate. In true womanli' ness the ladies of America are unsurpassed > by their sex throughout the whole world, i and yet the country allot-as lew women competent for the revenue service. Thousands > possess a part of the requisite qualifications, but very few possess them all. There are, however, several women in the force who are , especially adapted to the station?keen, cool, learned, and ladylike. ! The principle involved in the appointment of women in this department is that of the old saying, "Set a thief to catch a thief." 1 Set a woman to catch a woman. If custom j officers were all men, and importers all women, the revenues of the government would not pay for collecting; which I design as a compliment to the sex, and not a re' proach to the officers. One of the chief objections to crime and cheatery consists in the suspicions to which : all persons are on that account subjected, and the vast number of searchings, arrests, and investigations to which the innocent must 1 submit. It is impossible to overstate the 1 measure of embarrassment and chagrin felt by both the traveler and officer in connection . with the custom business, all of which springs , directly from the fact that a few criminals, . seeking to evade the law, mix with the many honorablo persons whose pleasure it is to comply with the law. This it is that leads to all our trouble aud sharp practice. If all were honest none would suffer, i "Why must I endure all this shameful . overhauling?" exclaimed one of the most I upright ladies that ever crossed the sea, while a female official was examining her personal belongings. ! "Because," replied the official, "some w.o! men are smugglers, and we cannot tell the good from the bad without searching." This is embarrassing to men, but ten times more to the other sex, to have one's elaborate toilet, made on shipboard for the meeting on the pier with old and new acquaintances, niillffl to nieces and turned inside out! is in -- I , I tensely trying and provoking. Female smug' glers have concealed contraband goods in t every article of apparel from top to toe, so I that the inspector, if faithful to his duty, has to "go through" the passenger, as the phrase is, however unpleasant the task may I be to all concerned. There is no evasion ! without malfeasance in office. Of course, thorough assurance of the integrity of a pas( senger enables the oflicer to accept his declaration or manifesto without search ; but with [ how many of the thousands of travelers can we have such an acquaintance? Numberless ' times every year we are bitterly blamed for ! not remembering and sparing ladies whose , baggage we inspect; and yet no human mem ory could retain so many. And, furthermore, , every little while some one of these very peoII pie proves to be a smuggler. I Only a few months ago a distinguished11 looking madam, accompanied by two grown 1 j daughters and a prim servant girl, stepped : from a steamer with an air that seemed to ; say, "We are too exalted in the social scale , for the inspectors to disturb us." Their hair was arranged with braids and twists in elaborate style. When the female inspector in5 formed them that she must examine such I coiffures for conceuled valuables, they stormed and raved, and finally resisted with such force that a couple of armed men had to be called into the office to enforce the law. | And then over three thousand dollars' worth of diamonds, not five weeks from South Af5 rica, and most of them still in the rough, ' were found on these ladies' heads. } A few years since a beautiful young lady t became furiously angry, almost to the degree ? of insanity, because the female official did P not recognize her a? the daughter of an exgovernor in a neighboring State, and persist) ed in searching her until hundreds of dollars' worth of costly laces were found as linings ; of her underclothing, layer after layer havi ing been carefully stitched in and concealed by cloth of common texture. When at last ' she was offered the alternative of paying the duty on these laces or surrendering them entirely, she chose the latter, as she had not 3 money to cancel the dues, and was unwilling ; j to let her father know of her criminality. ;! Scores of elaborate hats have been found . j to be the receptacles for costly goods, and t j not a few of them were necessarily so demori alized in the effort to remove the contraband j stuff as to be no longer fit to wear, and were : left behind. In one such case the lady went I home bareheaded, and made such complaint . that next day her brother appeared, accom; j panicd by officers bearing search warrants and warrants of arrest for the whole force, and threatened us with awful penalties on ' the charges of assault and robbery. How j ever, when told the full history of the case, 1 he was glad to withdraw the charges and . j pay his own costs. I Almost countless instances have occurred, taking all our ports of entry into account, of I dress patterns used as linings and worn home from abroad by ladies seeking to avoid > payment of dues. p! One woman went to Europe as tlihi and , gaunt as a consumptive, but upon returning, . two months later, was so apparently plump and ample in form as to instantly suggest her secret to one of our men. r "Walk l.ghtinto Mrs. Blank'sofiiee,"said lie, leading the way to the female inspector. "She will help you oil' with those extra ? things, and tell you how much is to pay on i them." ? The woman was a dressmaker, ami to ; evade duties, had actually cut, hasted togethi er, and put on nearly a dozen dresses of most > costly material. Mrs. Blank assessed her, > and after payment, helped her to make up 1: her goods into a snug hut immense bundle . which required a porter to carry. Numbers of young ladies have gone to r Baris with a well-lilled purse to invest its f contents in a wedding trousseau, and have it i made up abroad. Such a case is a trying or. deal for custom ollieers, for it touches a vul. nerahle spot in the armor of our integrity, i These lovely and blushing smugglers always . get through without detection, though not ; one of us would confess our secret knowledge i of the facts in such instances. r One such girl had been told on shipboard 11 by a more experienced fellow-passenger that ;! she would he taken into the female iaspect i! or's presence, and all her numerous concealed i wrappings of enchanting bridal fineries I stripped oil", and assessed enormously. The r sweet young thing had no more spare money . for such charges, and the object of her esca> pade to Baris had been kept secret from her . betrothed and other friends; hence she exi pected to lose everything. I'pon entering i Mrs. Blank's oflice she hurst into tears, and . began to confess her duplicity. But instant; ly Mrs. Blank comprehended the ease, and ? going to the street door beckoned a hack, . saying to the girl: "If you are sick, this is no place for you to tell of it. I'm no doctor. Here, get into , this carriage and go directly home." , Amazed, the girl obeyed. Mrs. Blank r helped carry out her valises, paid the hackman, and sent her oil'. A month later sev^ eral of us were invited guests at a wedding, , and greatly admired certain Parisian things, , | hut asked no questions for conscience' sake. Our female inspectors have discovered j great values of Mechlin, Venetian, and other costly laces packed away in the shape of paddings for "the human form divine," and ! the concealment, having been effected by the ' most skilful hands, almost defied detection. Eat persons cannot, however, engage quite as ' I safely or extensively in this method of conII cculuicnt as the lean. The more of a skele' i ton one is I he greater quantity of contraband ' j goods can he packed on in place of lacking > j llesh. ' Brohahly lady agents for importing houses ' have excelled all others, as some of them have made a study of smuggling for years. One of them went and came across the sea many times with the same umbrella, until by mere chance it was broken in our office, and i several hundred dollars' worth of Ea*t Indian pearls rolled out of the hollow handle. Another lady agent was detected in carryI ing a small chamois hag containing loose dia? inonds under her arm, a thin hand passing i over her shoulder and holding it in the arin| pit. There was good reason to believe that ! by this device she had defrauded thegovernI ment out of a large sum of legal duties, j Among our collection of relics and curioslilies is a delicate pair of lady's hoots, the! I high heels of which had been hollowed out, ! and contained each a diamond worth a large J amount. The woman had made a dozen i voyages wearing these or similar hoots, and , doubtless had enriched herself by their aid.; But she wore them once too often, when the! argus eyes of the female inspector focusscd them. The smuggler not only lost her con-! traband goods, but her boots, also, and left! the office in her stocking-feet. Still another went and came frequently, bearing a violoncello on which, by consent of flin ctonmiir's pntitniii she i laved appnmnnni ment to her singing, making excellent music,; and receiving handsome acknowledgement! in the way of cash contributions from passengers. She had a pitiful story of orphanage and poverty. But one day our inspector took three thousand yards of old Valenciennes laces from the 'cello, and now the girl has "quit the sea." Perhaps the most venturesome female smuggler we have ever known was agent for an importer of unquestionable integrity. But while working on a salary she cheated him as well as the government. She pretended to he a victim of seasickness, for which a lemon proved to he the best remedy. But at length the enormous size of the lemon which she always carried in her hand and frequently sucked, attracted attention? scarcely three in a cargo would equal it. Next it was discovered, by a coachman whom we had secured to help us in the case, that immediately upon entering his vehicle, she flung the shell of the lemon into the street. This shell he brought to us, and we found that it was hollow and dry within, and had evidently held a package of some sort. When she returned from her next trip, and entered Mrs. Blank's presence, that-official deftly snatched away her lemon, and searching it, brought forth a four thousand dollar diamond. That lemon made the whole force sick when we reflected how smartly this woman had beaten us by aid of it. A lemon may be quite valuable at sea. It was to her. cQm! \Pa/tingr+ _ , Powa Absolutely A cream of tartar baking powder. Highest of all in leavening strength.?Latest United Stales Government Food Report. Royal Baking Powder Co., 106 Wall Street, N. Y. A C K N W < >L KI)G KM K XT. A ROUT two years ago, our agency received an application for $1,000 from Mr. W. II. Powell, of Lenoir, in the Mutual Reserve. The policy was issued. Sometime ago Mr. Powell died of typhoid fever. The following acknowledgement from his widow gives the sequel. Read and relied. GRIST RROS. A RRICfi. Lknoih, N. C\, Deecinher 7,180.'!. Messrs. Grist Ruos. A- Brick, tSen'I Agents of the Mutual Reserve Fund Lifo Association, Yorkville,S. ('. (Scntlemen : I heg toaeknowledgc the receipt a of cheek for $1,000 from the Mutual Reserve Fund Life Association, of New York, 011 the National Park Rank, in full payment of policy No. 11N.H47 carried in that company by my late husband, W. Horace Powell, and to express my appreciation of the honorable manner in which it has fulfilled its contract without waiting for the expiration of the time allowed by law for the settlement of a death claim. From first to last my husband paid not more than ?f>0, in nearly two years, and now his widow and children have received in their hour of need $1,000; this fact alone will show the value of an insurance policy in an honorable, reliable and nrosperous insurance company like the Mutual Reserve Fund Life Association has proven itself to be. Ma Ay L. Powki.r,. P. S. If Mr. Powell had taken an ordinary life policy, in an Old System company, and paid the same amount in premiums as he jtaid the Mutual Reserve, his heirs would only have received $410 instead of $1,000. Gain by insuringin the Mutual Reserve, $AS4. CAUTION.?If a dealev offer* W. L, Douglas Shoe* at a reduced price, or say* ho has them without name stamped on bottom, put him down a* a fraud. W JL. Douglas CO QUAE BEST IN 90 UllUC THE WORLD. XV. L. DOUGLAS Shoes are stylish, easy fit. ting, and give better satisfaction nt the prices advcrtiscd than any other make. Try one pair and he convinced. The stamping of w. L. Douglas' name and price on the bottom, which guarantees their value, saves thousands of dollars annually to those who wear them. Dealers who push the sale of W. L. Douglas Shoes gain customers, which helps to increase the sales on their full line of goods. They can afford to sell at a less profit, and wo believe you can save money hv buying all your footwear of the dealer advertised below. Catalogue free upon application. Address, W. L. DOUGLAS* Brockton, filaaa. Sold by J. ?T. SMITH, Clover, S. C. January 10 2 21t THIS EXQUISITE YOUTH j Imported an Ancestor! j WHY AND WHEN LI [7 Pi I H IT I I HOW AND WHERE ML UI U II I j will he explained in _ Dan De Quille's _ j JTascinating Novelette Soon to appear in this paper. KEEP YOUR EYE ON ...? i Ul'K I'lLllU.V tUUUJU\3 I PHOTOGRAPH GALLERY. Thoroughly ntted up with new backgrounds, accessories, Ac., and witji a line i J sky-light, I am prepared Intake a picture in any ! ! style of the art, sis well executed sis can lie done j i elsewhere. |CHILDREN'S PICTURES A SPECIALTY.! By the dry plate process I can tsike them instantly; makes no ditl'erence about lair or cloudy ' | weather. I do sill my own printing and finishing, and j j there is veiy little delay in delivery. ENLARGED WORK. Pictures copied and enlarged and finished in j the highest style to lie hsid, and prices reasonable, j Give me si csdl and see specimens of work, sit i my Gallery on West Liberty street, near the jail, j J. R. SCHORR. January 21 t If I THE lORklTLLE ENQUIRER For 1894. Handsomely Printed on Strom f lite Paper, THE LOCAL NEWS A SPECIALTY. NOW IS THE TIME TO SUBSCRIBE! A $100 Wilcox & White Organ to he Awarded to the Club-Maker who Secures the Largest Nuin her of NEW SUBSCRIBERS by 4 o'clock |>. in. on Thursday March 15,1894. A too IH'liliV, A *7f> (101,1) WATCH AND A COKBIX DISK HAKKOW FOK THE THREE LAKIiEST CUBS. Premiums for other Clubs Kangiu); in Size rrum SIXTY Down to FIVE Subscribers. L1 It Kit A L COM I'KXSA 1'1 OX I'O It A L L 1IO 11 liKltS KOlt Til K KXQI'l It Kit. THE YORK VILLI? ENQUIRER entered on the FORTIETH YEAH of its publication on the THIRD DAY OF JANUARY, 1KM. In making our annual announcement we avail ourselves of the opportunity to return thanks to our friends and patrons for the generous supKirt that has been extended to THE KNQUIER for the past year, and to say that during 18f>4, we do not intend to take any steps backward ; but will endeavor to make the paper more and more entitled to the support of the people ot York county. THE ENQUIRER having intelligent, trustworthy and wide awake special correspondents in York and adjoining counties, but little transpires in which the people generally are interested, that is not promptly made known through its columns. Resides this, it shall continue to be our aim to watch carefully alter everything that is calculated to make known to the outside world the business advantages and natural resources possessed by York county?agricultural, mineral and climatic?and when we say York county, we do not mean any particular section of it, or any particular class of people; but THE WHOLEC<>UNTY ANI> ALI, TIIE FEl>I'LE. While the local and general news departments of the paper will be carefully looked after, all the features which have given THE ENQUIRER a distinctive original character from the ursi (lay 01 us piunieauon win lie iiiaiiuuiiicii. From tinio to time it will contain short storiesand serial stories from the best writers; every week a column of fun and humor; carefully selected and seasonable articles intended for tin benefit of the farmer and housewife. To recapitulate: It is our aim to print a hightoned, clean,.newsy family paper; one that i> RELIARLE, and one whose weekly visits will always be looked forward to with pleasure by its patrons. Terms of Subscription---Postage Free. Single Cppy, one year, ?2 IN Two Copies, one year...... 51 One Copy, two years, :i of One Copy, six months 1 in One Copy, three months, of Ten Copies, one year, 17 .r>< And one copy, one year, to the person making s club of TEN at ?1.75 for each subscriber. Payment required to be made in advance. PREMIUMS TO CLUB-MAKERS. For the three largest clubs of yearly subscrib ors, at $1.75 for each subscriber, we oiler the threi articles mentioned below, the aggregate value o the three being OMO HTNRKEDANR NINE TY-FIVK DOLLARS, as follows: For the largest club, a $!M) OPEN RTOOY' Particulars in regard to this pretniuiu will la found elsewhere. For the second largest club, one ?75.00 Watch The movement fortius Watch is manufacture! by the Columbus Watch Co., of Columbus, Ohio and is called the "Railway King." It has 11 jewels, in gold settings, extra center hole jewel patent regulator, adjusted to heat and cold gold finish. It is one of the finest movement) made in the Tinted States, and is used cxelu sivcly on a number of the great railroad system: by reason of its reliability as a time keeper. Tin movement will be fitted to a Ross tilled gob ease. Those cases are made of 14 karat gold am are warranted to wear 20 years. The price o the movement is $40 and that of the case ?.'35 making the value of the watch ?75. For the third largest club, a No. 7 12-disI latest improved Corbin Disk Harrow, worth ?10 To EVERY person who may obtain a club o sixty or more names, but who may fail to seeuri one of the three premiums already mentioned we will give as compensation, one Chicago Sim ger Sewing machine; or if the person entitled tr the machine docs not want it, we will give oik Fifty Tooth Evans Steel Frame Smoothing Harrow; or if the Harrow is not wanted, we will give one 11 jewel Elgin watch in a Fahy's dusl proof open face silver ease. The retail price o: the watch is?24.00. Either the Sewing Machine Harrow or Watch will be delivered free of expense for transportation. To EVERY person who may obtain a club of FORTY and less than sixty, but who fails to win one of the three leading "premiums, we will give one 7 jewel Elgin Watch in a Fahy's dust proof open face case, This watch usually retails at about ?1.'3. To every person who may obtain a club of THIRTY and less than forty subscribers, but who may fail to win the Buggy, the?75 Watch or the Disk Harrow, we will give as compensation for securing the subscribers, one 7 jewel, open faced American Standard Watch in a Fahy's dusl proof case. This Watch would be considered a bargain at ?10. For a club of FIVE and less than ten subscribers, we will give as compensation for securing the names, one 30-noui Nickle Alarm Clock, the retail price of which is ?1.75. To persons who make up clubs of TEN and less than twenty names, we will send THE ENQTIHFR one year free of charge; and tc those who may secure a club of TWENTY' and less than thirty names, we will forward THE ENQUIR ER one year free of charge, and a copy, one year, of any weekly newspaper or monthly magazine, published in the Tinted States, the publication to-be selected by the person entitled to receive it. The time fixed for completing clubs under the above oilers is limited to 4 o'clock p. in., on THTRSDAY, the 15th day of MARCH, IS!R. NEW SUBSCRIBERS. By NEW subscribers we mean persons whose names are not now on our subscription list and have not been within THREE MONTHS o! this date?November 1. A change of address FROM ONE MEMBER OF A FAMILY Til A NOT 11ER MEM BER OF Til E SAM E FAMILY, WILL NOT RECONSIDERED AS A NEW Sl'BSCRIBER. Every new subscribe! must be genuine. For the Largest Club of New Subscribers. To the person who may obtain and pay for the largest club of NEW SUBSCRIBERS between the tirst of November and THURSDAY, the loth March, 1S04, at a o'clock p. in., we will give ft* compensation one WILCOX A WHITE ORIS AN, valued at $11X1. [For full description ol the < >rgan see advertisement printed elsewhere.] The Organ is oH'ered independent of all othei premiums, andthe person who receives it will lie entitled to have his names counted in competition for either of the other premiums offered, For example: If the person who secures Hit organ shall have returned and paid for the largest list of names by Thursday, the 15th daj March, 1*!M, including those which entitled him to the Organ, he will be entitled to the$!Hl Buggy; if the second largest, including those wldeli entitled him to tlie Organ, he will be entitled to the $75.00 (told Watch ; if the third largest, including those which entitled him to the Organ, he will lie awarded the Corbin'Disk Harrow, If it is found that the person who secured thr organ has asullicient number of names on the fifteenth day of March, ls?H, including those which entitled him to the < M'gan, to entitle him to a premium oll'ered for sixty, forty, thirty, twenty, ten or live names, and has failed to secure one of the three lirst premiums, he will be awarded either premium he may select to which the number of names returned entitles him. RENEWALS count just the same as new subscribers in competition for all premiums except the (>rgan. CONDITIONS. No name will be counted in competition for a premium, and no premium delivered, until thr subscription price has been paid. It is not necessary that the names of a chili should all be at the same postotlice. Name? may be taken at any number of places. One name for two years will be equivalent to twe names for one year each. t'lub makers are requested to send in name? us rapidly as they secure them. All subscriptions must be forwarded to us at the expense of those sending them. We will lie responsible for the safe transmission of money only when sent by draft, registered letter or money order drawn on the S'flrkville postotlice. In sending names, write plainly, give i>ostollice, county and State. All subscriptions will be discontinued at the expiration of the time paid for. A separate list will be kept for each clubmaker, who will be credited with each name sent, so that the number sent by any one person may be ascertained at a moment's notice. In case of a tie for either premium, two weeks will be allowed in which to "untie." Persons who commence making clubs, will not be permitted, after the names have been entered on our books, to transfer the names to another club-maker's list. .yTCr The time in which additions may be made to cluhs under our propositions win c.\pirvon TIICRSDAY, Til 10 loth DAY OF MAlU'H, 1S! H, at 4 o'clock, i>. m., there fori', persons who desire the benefit of elub rates, must subscribe and pay for the paper before that day, as alter the expiration of that time, it will not*be furnished for less than 82.IMI unless new clubs are formed. All letters should be addressed to L. M. GRIST, Yorkvilie, S. V. MONTVAI.K STOCK FA KM, lllitcksbut-g, S. C. RKiilSTKKKI) JKRSKYS, WKLCII AND SIIKTLAXD POXIKS. (Imported stock.) KSSKX AND KKtilKTKKKD ClIKHIIIKK PIUS. Itred and Ibrsale. ol'li JKRSKYS are all of the celebrated Victor and Stoke Regis strains, which have attracted so much attention throughout the North. HI LL CALVKS FOR SALK AT FARMKRS' PRICKS. If you arc thinking of starting a dairy herd don't overlook the Jerseys. Tliev are the best dairy cows known to the world. We guarantee our ponies to be perfectly safe for ladies and children to drive. CAN SKLL S1IKTLAND PON IKS AS CI IKA P AS ANY HRKKDKRS IN TI1K SOl TII. Write for what you want. Address, Dr. J. O. HLACK, Blaeksburg, S. C. I ^ for Infants ^and Children. " Castor I a U so well adapted to children that 0 Castoria cures Colic, Constipation, T O n,. tiPiMtorlntl ?*? I SAiirfttrtmrt/'li nJurrlimil 7'nictfttion. known to nc." II. A. Archer, M. I>., Kills Worms, gives Bleep, and promotes <IiIII So. Oxford St., Brooklyn, N. Y. gestioti, "Without injurious medication. "Tho use nt 'C'astoria is m universal and "For several years I have recommended i:s merits so well known that it seems a work your ' C'astoria,' and shall always continue to i f sujiercrogation to endorse it. Few nre the do so as it has invariably produced beneficial intelligent families who do not keep C'astoria results." within easy reach." Edwin F. Pardee, M. D., Cakiajs Maiitvx, I). I),, 125th Street and 7th Ave., New York City. New York C'ity. The Centaur Company, 77 Murray Street, New York City, TO BE GIVEN AWAY! $100 WILCOX a WHITE ORGAN |To be Awarded to the Club-maker who ReI ? ?5 ^ ? 4- E-fc. - ?. W ?. -MT%T" m mm.m "? -ff I urn* mid '?(y* iuf iiit* iiuiiiuci vi NEW SUBSCRIBERS j Between November 1st, 189*}, and ill arch 13th, 1894, at 4 o'clock j>. nt. fio to Work RIGHT NOW and KEEP AT IT J 1 LAST year wo awardeit A ONE HUNDRED DOLLAR WILCOX & WHITE ORGAN as a premium to the club-maker who returned and paid for the largest number of NEW SUBSCRIBERS within a specified time, and as the oiler was received with such great favor by . the club makers, we propose to repeat it this year, and by a special arrangement effected with the manufacturers, through their general agent for this section, Mr. GEORGE T. SCIIORB, of i Yorkville, we arc enabled to offer an instrument that IS THE EQUAL OF ANY $100 ORGAN MANUFACTURED 1 In the United States, and far superior to most of them. The above picture will give a fair idea of | the appearance of the organ, and the following description shows that it is an iinstrument which will please the most exacting artist: The ease will be either Black Walnut or Quartered Oak,.as 1 may bo preferred. It is <> feet high, 4 feet in length, 21 inches in depth, and the ease is finely . finished and hand rubbed. Same quality of tone and workmanship as is found in their higher [ priced styles It is ornamented with two French plate beveled edge mirrors and has a closed ' convenient musical receptacle. It has eleven stops, none of which are "dummies." | THE WILCOX X WHITE ORGAN COMPANY , Stands at the very head of the list of manufacturers of line, RELIABLE AND DESIRABLE I INSTRl'M ENTS, ami has received more medals and diplomas on regular catalogue styles than. any other American manufacturer of organs. Its organs are handled by leading dealers through, the world, and is enthusiastically endorsed by musicians. A great many of them are in use in ! York and adjoining countiesaml are giving universal satisfaction. The organ will be awarded to the club-maker who returns and pays for the largest number of NEW yearly subscribers to THE ENQUIRER at ?d.7"> each, between NOVEMBER 1, 189.'!, ami THURSDAY, MARCH 15, 1894, AT 4 O'CLOCK P. M. With the organ will go, without extra expense, one Plush Top Stool worth $5 ; and a copy ot f Dr. J. G. Harnett's Electric Organ Teacher, worth $2.50, and by the use of which a person may i! become a skillful performer; not needing any other teacher. ; THE <>I*<;AIV IS (ilTxYHAISTEEI) " By the WILUOX A* WHITE ORGAN COMPANY for six years, and by Mr. SCIIORB for no less than twenty. He proposes to keep it in thorough order free of expense to the person who ' wins it. 1 -- ?'V..r IWII MM.., ..,111 Iw, ?,...,^,1?,1 fr, tli.. Now we want id use some \ iviu r..c ,.... ..v. ............ . person who may secure and PAY for the largest numberof NEW YEARLY SUBSCRIBERS at j?1.7;?eaeh, between November 1, IN!).'!, and March 1">, IMS, at 4 o'clock p.'m.,and we EARNEST. LY REQUEST EVERY ONE WHO EXPECTS TO ENTER THE RACE, to READ our 11 prospectus'and learn all the conditions, and especially as to what is meant by a NEW subscribers, . and then go to work without delay and KEEP AT IT. The largest club of New subscribers, whether it be 10 or loo, or more, takes the organ. LEWIS 31. GRIST, Yorkville, S. C. FINE $90.00 OPEN BUGGY i TO BE GIVEN AWAY To tlie Person Who Secures the Largest Club of Subscribers to TUP PXQTIKPK?Old | and New C ounting fust the Same. mmOi AIU*?i<iV nmilc 1?v tin1 CAHOLINA Itl'tltl Y COM PANY.of Yorkvillc, isa thing of beauty, and is its durable ais it is possible to make a vehicle with the same amount of wood and steel, and for this reason TIIK KN'tH'IKKH lias been using the CAROLINA HI (JOX C(),'S .? ; vehicles for several years as a PRKMIl MS Tot 'LI 15 MAKKRS;aud as we have never used a a inorb acceptable preiniuni, have decided to continue its use FOR THE FALL AND WINTER CONTEST OF 1893- 94. The buggy we have arranged to oiler is a jj51M).00 OI'KX III (i(i\ with either end or side-bar i soriinrs. and as stated above, is as line a vehicle as is on the market at the price, and we think it i equal to a great many that sell for more money. It is our purpose to award this buggy to tlm C'Ll R-MAKhR \\ 11 < > MAY RKTl'RN AND PAY KOK the largest number of Y'KARLY SI HSl'RlllKRS?both old and new?between INOVKMRKR 1, 1SJI.I. and TIlt'RSDA V. MARCH loth, 1S!?4, at 4 o'clock p. in., whether, the number be TEX, FIFTY, (>NK III NbltFI) OR MilltK, at Sl.,.? eaeb. i The reputation of the carolina lJl'UtCY company's Work is something of whieli the people of South Carolina should feel proud, as notwithstanding the fact that our country is now passing through the greatest financial stringency of the past twenty years, the company lias been operating its plant to its full capacity and has been unable to keep up with the orders* No ! stronger testimonial could be offered as to the high standing of its work with those who know what I pood work is. SOMEBODY IS GOING TO WIN THIS BUGGY, And wo have No l'KKFKKKNCK AS TO WHO TIIK WIXXKRSHALL UK. What we ! propose to do is to award it to the person who returns and pays for the largest number of sub' scriliers, both OLD and MOW, between the dates mentioned above. The otl'er is open to the j world. (Jo to work today. LKW IS M OHIST, Yorkville, S. ('. i GARXiY II*OIV ROOFING COMPANY, Manufactures all kinds of ^Jit 'HON ORK PAIN'T i chimi'KD ani) rouuroatkosii>ino, l.V-TO IAS M KRWIX ST., Iron Tile or Shingle, <Tfv??lnn<I, <>. i KIRK I'ltOOK IIOORS, Slll'TTKHS, ,tC., i - r? eai? T-'t xmiii lor Circular and Price List No. 75. THE LARGEST MANUFACTURERS OF IRON ROOFING IN THE WORLD. JfSST Orders received l>y L. M. GKIST.