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Humorous Department. . AFRAID TO GIVE THEM THE CHANCE. New Orleans to the North-bred man is a curious city with its strongly contrasted population, and not the least interesting place there is the Health Office, where is kept an accurate record of births and deaths. From t there also all marriage licenses are issued, and the men behind the long counter come face to face constantly with the sorrows and r joys of the great population. A marriage ^ license is a necessity, but the the absence of ^ it had not deterred an old African from joining in holy bonds at different times fully y 100 of his color and kind. Finally, from j some source or another, the old man learned ^ that his marriages were not legal without the record and its accompanying license, ( and he became troubled in his mind. He j appeared at length at the Health Office. g "Mawnin'," said he as he ambled in. "Be dis de place whar you obscure de li- -< censes to marry?" "Yes, sir." Then with much evident mental peturbation he proceeded to state his case, and to t o- express his desire and design to right the ^ wrong. g "Have you no record of the marriages you have made?" f "No, boss, I have none. Nebber thought i but what I was intendin' to de Lo'd's busi- , ness. But they's legal, ain't they ?" he con- g tinued anxiously. J "No. I am afraid not; and the only thing ^ lor you to do will be to marry them all over again." g The old man smiled and wagged his pate at this advice and said: "Yah! No, sah! You 'spose I's gwine let dem niggahs know they'se not married? f No, sah. Why some of dem young bucks is done tired now, and if I tell 'em they'se not married they'll be droppin' out jes' like tarrypins jumpin' off a log."?Cincinnati En quirer. ^ Wanted Him.?The general superintendent was sitting in his office when a 6 well dressed man entered. 1 "This is the superintendent ?" 1 "Yes." 1 "Glad to see you, sir. My name is Balkers and I want a job." ? "In what department?" "Want a position as conductor on a pas- 1 senger train." c "Do you understand your business?" 1 "Try me once?" } "I suppose you'd turn in every cent that ? belonged to the company ?" * "No, sir; but I'd whack up." ? "About how much would you take per ' ' day?" ] "Owing to business." "You'd always make it a point to bring J in some little money, wouldn't you ?" 1 "Well, I'd help myself first, and then?" "My friend," said the superintendent, "I * want you. You have told me the first 1 truth that I have heard for years."?Arkan- 1 saw Traveler. 1 An Unpleasant Reminder.?It was ( at a K street residence and the young ] man had been going often and staying late i until the girl felt the monotony. One night 1 s about 11 o'clock the conversation dragged 1 and for a minute or two he sat in a cogita- s tive mood with his hand to his forehead. 1 "I had something pleasant to tell you," i he said finally. i >"Yes," she responded inquiringly, "what 1 was it?" s "Um?um?let me see," rubbing his head, t "I can't just think what it was." i "May be it was 'good night'," she sug- \ gested. 1 "He looked at her for a minute but she 1 never flinched; and then he went away \ and up to date he has not been back.? 1 Washington Critic. c A Dnnr tr HPrT W A OV^T PpIVTVIl ? A I A IVLr.'j 1 iu.li f! i. A ? patent medicine manufacturer, having sent to the wile of a prominent Newport, Ky., pnan a bottle of his medicine for trial, after a suitable length of time had passed wrote him as to wit: Dear Sir?Please write over you own signature what effect the medicine had on your wife. The reply was to wit: "She only took one dose of it, and it nearly killed her. Another would have had the desired effect, but I couldn't get her to take any more;" and though he signed his name in full to his reply, for some reason or other it .was never printed in any paper by the patent medicine man.?Kentucky State Journal. A Bit of Kentucky Humor.?When Dr. Bowling, a pioneer medical man in the South, began practice he settled in the wilds of Kentucky, where he sat in front of his cabin for six months without a call. At last he heard the clatter of a horse's hoofs and a lank barefooted Kentuckian appeared. "Are you a doctor?" he asked. "Yes, and a good one," said Bowling. "What is the matter with that 'ar foot?" the man inquired, placing his heel on the fence. The doctor examined it closely and replied: "That, sir, is erysipilas." Erynothin'," said the man, "a bee stung me." The doctor moved to Nashville. A Very Successful Case.?First Lawyer?"Ah, Dobkins how did you come out in that case you were just beginning when I went out"? Second Lawyer?"Gloriously. It was a perfect success; created a great sensation; papers full it: got lots of advertising out of it. I think it was the making of my future." "Good! Glad to hear it, old fellow. I knew you had the stuff in you; and, by the way, what did they do with^oiip-cH3ni,T" "Oh, theyhan^d4Hfir:r'?Chicago News. ^?xSxt'eler to Waiter.?"Is this my i room!" "Yes, sah." ; "There are two beds in it. I don't wan't c two beds. What's the other one for ?" ] "De next man, sah." g "What man? I thought I paid for the f right of being exclusive here." rj "So you can, sah; so you can." t "How am I going to manage that?" "Doan speak ter him." a I?*"Here Mary, come to the window. 0 Who is that man up in our walnut tree?" "Oh, that's poor Mr. Jinks, our ash- ^ man." * "Well, what's the matter with him, has 1 he got a fit?" "Oh no. He said he felt a chill coming 1 on, so I sent him up the tree. Just see, he ^ has shaken every one of them off and sav- e ed us so much trouble."?Rambler. ^ ? ? i Plainly Put.?A doctor is called to a s man suffering from asthma. His visit is over, he is stopped in the entry by the sick i man's wife. s "Well doctor, what do you think of my \ poor husband ?" x: "Reassure yourself, asthma is a patent of f longevity." j "But you will cure him of it, won't you ?" f It rather disgusted a Vermont man ^ who went to a neighbor's farm to steal a s cow to find when he got the animal home that it was his own cow which his neigh- j s bor had stolen earlier in the night. ! ^ Young Mother.?"What! give whisky ' rJ to the baby! Why, you must be crazy !" j $ Young Husband?"I find it very effica-1 cious when I have trouble with my teeth." 1 - . ?be Jfoig Seller. PINKIE'S REVENGE. BY HELEN HUNT JACKSON. "What a perfect shame that she got here ;o-day!" "Sh?Sh?, she might year you!" "Nonsense! She is down in the reception oom. I don't suppose, if she is from the mckwoods, she has got ears that can hear hrough doors." "Girls, I am ashamed of you. How can ve have her at the dinner table to-night? [ shall die of mortification to have to inroduce her to Mr. Morris as our cousin." "Perhaps she will be too tired to come lown to dinner after such a long ride. It s a little awkward to add another to a let dinner party." "Oh ! mamma, bless you for the thought. fou can tell her that she is too tired. You ?n arrange it, I know!" "Well, I'll try!" These were the sentences which fell on he ears ;of Priscilla Bent, as she sat alone, vaiting to see the aunt and cousins whom ihe had come all the way from Kansas to Sew York to visit, of whose welcome she elt as sure as if she had known them all ler life. It was by a blunder of the servant that she had been shown directly up itairs into the drawing room, which comnunicated by folding doors with the room vhere were sitting mother and daughters. "Pinkie! What a name!" continued the ipeaker. "Who ever heard of such a name ixcept for a dog?" "Her name isPricilla," replied the mother; but'Pinkie'was given to her by her ather, when she was a little girl, on account >f her pink cheeks." "Well, I shall call her Priscilla." "And I, too." "Your father will not like it," said Mrs. 3ent. "But we must go down." A swift rush of three women down the itaircase, three loud exclamations of disnay at the sight of the empty reception 'oorns, looks of wonder and smothered vhispers of vexation. "How stupid of Ben ! Do you suppose ihe heard ?" These were the next scenes in the swift ittle drama which here began so inauspi:iously under Mr. Silas Bent's roof this norning. And next to these followed one vhich seemed almost a justification ol ill that the Misses Bent had said in regard o their cousin. Slowly rising to her feet, jrasping her umbrella firmly in her left land, rose a tall, exceedingly tall young voman, who exclaimed in a nasal voice: 'Well, I v/a3 jest a-comin' to look ye up. [ didn't know as that fine, black gentlenan o' yourn had condescended to let fou know I was here. I'm most tired o death, I tell you; four days and four lights in the cars is enough to kill an ox, >ut I'll be all right soon's I get my coffee. [ reckon breakfast's all cleared away by this ;ime, but I don't want much, only a cup o! :offee, if the cook haint thrown it out. ['m real glad to see you. I s'pose uncle got n\r lofrfrpr didn't. hp?" And DflUSinQ' in ler breathless speech, pretty Priseilla Bent ooked sheepishly into the faces of her ihame-iaced relatives. If they had not )een too guiltily disturbed in their own ninds of fears of having been overheard n their inhospitable comments, they might rave detected a strange look on their Kan(as cousin's face, a strange mixture ot winkle and terror. But they saw, heard jothing except what corroborated their vorst fears. Even Mrs. Bent herself, whc rad resolved beforehand to be thoroughly rind to the child of her husband's brother, ,vas thrown off her balance, and, in spite ol rerself, the welcome she gave was curt and ;ool. But nothing appeared to daunt the terri)le Pinkie. Radiant good humor shone in ler face; her tongue ran like a clapper, and vhen the dinner party was mentioned Pinke cried: "Not much! I ain't too tired. I'll just )unk down, and by six o'clock I'll be fresh is a rooster! We don't often get a chance oa regular dinner party out in Emporia, ind I don't mean to miss one this winter. >ay?shall I wear my very best ? I've read ibout the kind of clothes you New Yorkers vear to dinners. But I've got some A No. . gowns, I tell you. Now, you just show me ny room, and I'll go straight to bed and itay there till dinner time. You let your )laek man bring me up a tumbler of milk, vill ye, along about 1 o'clock, and a doughlut or hard-tack. I'm used to eatin' hearti.. :_ .114Ua 11 y in me iiuuuie u uic uaj. When the door was finally shut upon ?inkie, her aunt and cousins exchanged ooks. "Horrible!" cried the youngest daughter, Carrie. "It's worse than I ever conceived, low could papa send for her ?" "He has not seen her since she was ten rears old," said Mrs. Bent, dismally. "Of ourse he could not dream that she would >e like this. He has always said her moth;r was a charming woman, and they lived n Europe for several years when she was ittle. It is horrible, girls!" "Bunk down!" ejaculated the eldest laughter, Sophia. "Fresh as a rooster!" echoed Carrie. 'Mamma, I shall go to bed myself, and be oo ill to appear to-night. I never can live hrough it?never! I don't believe Mr. dorris will ever cross our threshold again." "Then he is welcome to stay away." drs. Bent hotly. White this distressed conversation was joing on between Mrs. Bentand her daugher, Pinkie, safe locked In her room, was lolding one with herself. Tears sparkled n her eyes, but her face was full of mirth. "I will!" she muttered. "I will do it. It vill be good enough for them. I know I an. It will teach them a good lesson. 3ut I shall have to work like a Trojan to ret the dress done. Let me see what I lave got that will do. Ha! I have it! rhat old tableau dress will be just the hing." "How lucky I brought it!" she chuckled is she shook out the folds of a white muslin >f the most antiquated country fashion. 'Now I can go to sleep and rest easy for an lour, 'awkward and dowdy.' That is what will be," and in five minutes mischievous >inkic Bent was sound asleep. Anxiety and vexation had made Carrie 11, and it was with a most unbecoming lush on ner narrasseu mee umi sue npyu?id in the drawing room a few moments lefore the dinner hour. There sat the cousn from Kansas. Was ever such a figure een in a New York drawing room before ?" A plain white muslin made in the sheplerdess style, very full and very short, carlet stockings, a broad scarlet sash, and vorst of all, on her head a turban of white nuslin, with a scarlet poppy daunting in ront. This is what the malicious Pinkie iad done with herself, whose trunks were ull of exquisite French gowns, such as her ousins had never owned, and not often een. She knew at least that opals on soft vhite would command a certain sort of repect even from her inhospitable relatives. "Thank heaven she wore them. That vill show people she at least has money, rhat necklace couldn't have cost less than 1,000." "Yes," replied Pinkie, nonchalantly, "ma ikes 'em best of all she's got. They're ma's. I like flowers better. I'm great on <2 artificial flowers; always wear 'em every / day." The guests were already arriving, Mr. Bent himself among them, he having, according to the fashion of New York business men, : arrived home only in time to dress for dinner. His heart was so full of affectionate welcome for his niece, whom he remembered as a beautiful child of ten, only half a * dozen years ago, that he did not at first note . anything but the lovely uplifted eyes and r the?affectionate voice. As the dinner progressed even unobserv- t. ant Mr. Bent became aware that his niece's ^ attire was not what it should be, and that c her voice was too loud. "But the women j folks," he said to himself, "can soon straighten that all out, and the child's as pretty as _ a picture." i So also thought the Hon. Mr. Morris, c who to Carrie's vexation, on being told by her that the young lady in white was a j cousin, who had arrived most inopportunely ^ from Kansas, had exclaimed : r "From Kansas! How delighted lam! j mat is tne state 01 an owiers j. am must interested in seeing. If all the Kansas ladies have so wonderful a complexion as yourYousin, that is another reason for visiting the region. Pray present me to her, will you? I should like to ask her many questions. Perhaps, eh?" he stammered, with the curious mixture of diffidence and audacity one so often sees in Englishmen? "perhaps your mother will be so good as to let me have the pleasure of sitting by her i side at dinner?that is if it will not disarrange your plans." "I am quite sure mamma will not relinquish the pleasure of having you chiefly to herself at dinner," responded Carrie, her , heart full of anger and mortification. Nevertheless, several times in the course of dinner Mr. Morris heard the shrill voice and thought to himself: "What a pity the American voice is so high-pitched !" When the gentlemen joined the ladies in the drawing room Mr. Morris looked eagerly for the Kansas cousin. Not seeing her, he accosted Mrs. Bent with true English bluffness: "I don't see your niece from Kansas. I hope she is not gone. I was counting on talking with her the rest of the evening." With mingled resentment and confusion i Mrs. Bent replied: "My niece went up stairs immediately after dinner." In truth, Mrs. Bent was in a state of nervous bewilderment. Without for a mo> ment suspecting the real cause of Pinkie's ' withdrawal, she had perceived that the girl was greatly moved as she came swiftly to her when they were entering the drawing room. ' "Aunt, I must ask you to excuse me. I am going up stairs to change my dress; I was not dressed as I should have been." ' "Never mind, child, never mind." Pinkie was gone. [ It did not take long for her to finish her transformation touches. The dainty white surah silk with billowy reach of white lace ' from belt to helm, the soft, clinging gloves 1 to the shoulders, the opal bracelets, the ; white ostrich feather fan, the white satin slippers?all were in readiness. But at last ; Pinkie's heart failed her. 1 "It was a shameful trick to play on them. ! I shall cry; I know I shall, and I'd rather ; die than cry before that Englishman." At last she stole down slowly, hesitatingly. Black Ben caught sight of her first, and reeled back with excitement. It was an unerring instinct which led Pinkie, on entering the drawing room, to glide swiftly to her uncle's side, and putting i both hands into his, say: "Dear Uncle Silas, won't you make my peace with aunt, and ask your friends here to forgive me for masquerading at dinner?" Before she had half finished speaking the company had gathered close around her. "I must say?" began Mrs. Bent, in angry tone. But Pinkie went on resolutely: "I could not resist the temptation to live 1 up to the New Yorker's idea of a Kansas girl, just for an hour or two. You know that I was exactly the sort of a person you all expected to see from the West." She gathered courage as she saw smiles. "Yes, you all know it," embracing the group in her appealing glance, "and we out West all I Irnnn. ?f Tlion fnrrri xra mp Vnn fhPin 1 rwxv/w iv? jl iivii jivigt tv u*v* * to forgiye me, dear Uncle Silas won't you ?" 1 But Uncle Silas was laughing too heartily. ( He bent over and kissed her forehead. "I ask them all to forgive me for kiss- ' ing you," he said. "A capital joke, Pink- 1 ie!" : "The best piece of acting I ever saw," ^ cried the Hon. Mr. Morris; "quite clever, 1 very neat. Upon my word, though, I do j not think now, really Miss Bent, I should not have seen through it. I don't think s you could have deceived me." 1 "I should not have tried," replied Pinkie, ( . very simply. Yet there was a certain un- 1 definable something in her tone that made ^ the Hon. Mr. Morris change color. [ There are no words ?. which to describe J the embarrassment of Mrs. Bent and her y daughters. . "Had Pinkie overheard what they said . about her?" ; They sounded her as far as they dared, but they never found out. e To only one person did Pinkie ever tell | the whole. That was to the Hon. Mr. Mor- , ris, after she was his wife some weeks. "! tk'J'Jght ii was unjust in them, Frank," she said, "so cruel, I'd just give them a les- s son and let them see that manners may be ' only skin deep?easily put on or off. But I'd never have done it, Frank, if I'd seen you first; I wanted to run out ot the room ^ as soon as I saw you look at me. "You needn't have done so," replied lion. ? Mr. Morris, "for I thought as soon as my eyes fell on you that I had never seen so lovely a face before. s "Hid you really?" asked Pinkie. "Really," answered the Hon. Mr. Morris. * The Noise of the Fingers.?When a you poke the end of your finger in your t ear, the roaring noise you hear is the sound v of the circulation in your finger, which is s the fact, as any one can demonstrate for \ himself by first putting his fingers in his t ears, and then stopping them up with other substance. Try it and think what a won- v der of a machine your body is, that even the c points of your fingers are such busy work- r shops that they roar like a small Niagara, v The roaring is probably more than the cir- ^ culation of the blood. It is the voice of s all the vital processes together?the tearing g down and building up processes that areall; ways going forward in the living body, i ! from conception down to death. c There always comes some smooth a * - - A- '-I - ^ ^ nil * r? rlnnn I ti running to every skciu uuiwc an is nunc. ? You mustn't try to see through the whole h skein or to straighten it all out into a sin- s j gle thread before you begin to wind; that t makes a snarl always. There is always an n end, and it is what you have got to take t hold of.?A. J). T. Whitney. BSrlt is sometimes a hard matter to be v certain whether you have received ill usage a or not; for men's actions oftentimes look h worse than they are ; and one must be thor- t oughly informed of a great many things s before he can rightly judge. k \ leading fur the #abkth. CONDUCTED BY UEV. ROBERT LATHAN. [Original.] WATER MADE WINE. "A miracle is an effect or event contrary o the established constitution or course of hings, or a sensible suspension or control if, or deviation from, the known laws of iature."?Horne. Both in the Old Testament and in the *ew Testament there is a record of a great nany events or effects, which, by Christians if every name, are regarded as miracles. n tne i\ew Testament aione mere is a rec?rd of between forty and fifty. These were ill performed by Christ, or his disciples. >Ve have no reliable testimony of any mira:les having been performed after the close >f the first century. The first miracle perormed by our Saviour was the turning of vater into wine. About this there are nany things which are interesting. The >lace, we are told, was in Cana. of Galilee. Previous to the time of our Saviour, the and ot Palestine was divided into three mrts?Judea, on the South ; Samaria, in the :entre, and Galilee, in the North. After he captivity, Galilee was settled by Jews, Vrabs, Greeks, Phoenicians and Syrians. >uch being the character of the population heir language became Galilean and "bevayed" Peter. Galilee was less than thirty niles square, but it was very fertile and favorably situated for commerce, and soon >ecame very populous. It is said to have ontained two hundred towns, each with a >opulation of fifteen thousand inhabitants. .n the southern part of Galilee about seveny miles, nearly north from Jerusalem and ibout fifteen miles southwest from Caperrnum, Cana was situated. About seven niles from Cana, a little west of south, was Nazareth, where our Saviour spent the greater part of his life. The time of the miracle of turning water nto wine is introduced by John, by whom t is recorded, thus: "And the third day here was a marriage in Cana of Galilee." fhis probably means the third day after Philip brought Nathaniel to the Saviour. .t was in the first year of our Saviour's pubic ministration. We are further told that the miracle was lerformed at a marriage feast. The mar intrp fpast.q nf the .Tews general 1 v. if not al "*n w ? * ? a / i ? ? vays, lasted seven days. To this feast we ire told both Jesus and his disciples were nvited. It is very probable that between he family of Mary, the mother of Jesus, ind either the bride or the bridegroom there ,vas some connection. Such being the case, Fesus was invited because he was the son of Mary, and his disciples were invited be:ause of the relationship which they susained to him. So far as we know, Jesus, at his time, had butsix disciples, Andrew and lis brother Peter, James and his brother Fohn, Philip and Nathaniel, who, we are ;old elsewhere (John 21:2) was of Cana. It was, Mark tells us, on the Sea of Galilee ,hat Andrew, Peter, John and James were found by our Lord. Cana was distant, due west of the Sea of Galilee, about ten miles. Some place in the country between the Sea if Galilee and Cana, Philip was found by Jesus. It was probably at Cana that Philip found Nathaniel, and brought him to Jesus, ind that Jesus and his disciples were taken iy Nathaniel to his house and entertained. Such being the case Jesus and his disciples were invited, about the beginning, or only \ short time before the beginning of the feast. It is possible that the persons entering into the relationship of husband and wife had been betrothed before Jesus went Jown from Nazareth to Bethabara, to be 11 -1 1 x.j _ x_ .m 1 t. l puDiiciy inuucieu mio umee uy juiuj, ms forerunner, and that he returned, that he might attend the marriage feast. Mary, the mother of Jesus, who seems to have been very familiar with every thing lbout the house in which the feast was celebrated, came to Jesusand said to him "they lave no wine." She had, by some means, earned the fact that the wine was all consumed, and on account of some connection which she had with the family, she came :o her son, in a state of anxiety, and made <nown this fact. It is very probable that the family was poor, and that the supply of wine at the beginning was very small and that it was -vine of an interior quality. This last fact, we may safely infer, from what the master )f the feast said to the bridegroom. Our Saviour replied to his mother, "What rnve I to do with thee, woman," or rather, is the Greek is, "What is that to me and to ,'ou, woman," which simply means if the .vine is out, or if they have no wine, that is lothing to us. It is not our business to furbish wine for the feast. It seems, however, hat Mary, mother-like, was anxious for her ion to make some display of his divine bower, and whatever may have been her lesires they were not wise, for our Saviour leclared that his hour was not yet come, vhich appears to mean that the hour for loing what she desired had not yet arrived. Mary certainly knew that Jesus, her son, vas the Messiah. This was declared to her by the angel Gabriel, and she kept the sayngs of Jesus, when twelve years old, in her leart, but it is very likely that she, like the nass of the Jews, had very vague and carml notions of the official work of the Mesiiah. For some reason Mary was persuaded that resus would, in some way or other, maniest his glory at this feast. It may be that is a loving and dutiful son, Jesus had intinated as much to his mother in private, )utshe had given a wrong interpretation to he words of her son, and was perhaps only arnally affected by them. It seems clear hat Mary expected Jesus to do something ixtraordinary, but what, she did not know, fence she said to the servants "Whatsoever le saith unto you, do it." That the individuals furnishing the feast might be saved he mortification of having it known to heir guests, and published abroad throughiut the whole village that they had given a ktAMMin/?A n r>/l lUnl flio lxrinn liorl foi 1 orl IlilllHlgC iuiiai, ami null mv. itiiii. ikiu umv.u :t the very beginning of the feast, Jesus old the servants to fill six stone water pots cith water. These water pots were set in ome convenient place and designed to hold cater with which the guests might wash hemselves. As the Jews washed frequently, we may cell suppose that the water pots were capaious, but there is no certainty as to how nuch they' held. These water pots or jars cere filled hy the servants to the brim. Vhen this was done, our,Saviour said to the ervants, "Draw out now, and bear to the ;overnor of the feast." The governor or ruler of the feast was an ndividual chosen to manage everything onnected with the entertainment. His lusiness, as the word literally means, was to rrange the guests on the couches, or as we could say, at the table. It was a part of lis official business to taste the wine. So oon as the governor of the feast had tasted he water that was made wine, he prolounced it good wine?better than what had ieen previously served. The fact that the wine had failed was not mown to the governor of the feast, neither cas it known to the bridegroom, and probbly only to the intimate friends of the ridegroom. It is probable that according o the custom of the times, a period was oon to arrive when the fact would become mown to all the guests. This would have : shocked the sensibilities of the guests, and grievously mortified the person or persons ; furnishing the feast. At this critical junci ture of affairs our Saviour interposed, i It is manifest that this was a real miracle, i Pure water was turned into wine. There is | no chemical process by which this can be done. It is evident that the water in the water pots was not mixed with wine. Had this been done the governor of the feast would not have pronounced it good wine. The object for which this miracle was performed seems to have been two-fold. The first was to show mercy to the poor. The second was that Jesus might manifest his glory so that his disciples might believe in him as the Son of God. It is a remarkable fact that the first miracle of our Saviour was performed at a marriage feast, thus giving his approbation publicly to the marriage relation. As such occasions as marriage feasts were joyful occasions, we see our Saviour countenancing, with his presence, innocent mirth. We are nr?fr. tr? nnnplnrlp that, nnr Xnvimir PtlPOlir aged drunkenness because he made wine. Whether the wine made by our Saviour contained alcohol or not, no one can say knowingly. It was such wine as was in common use at that time, in that country, among the Jews. It was used by them very much as we use coffee and tea. To conclude that our Saviour favored drunkenness because he turned water into.wine, would be as foolish and wicked as to conclude that God encourages gluttony because he gives us rain from heaven and fruitful seasons. Nothing can be clearer than that drunkenness is plainly declared in the Bible to be a heinous sin. Neither does the fact that our Saviour turned water into wine warrant any man in converting corn into whisky. Drunkards and distillers cannot hide behind the expression "When men have well drunk." This does not mean when men have become intoxicated. Did it mean this it would favor the notion that at these marriage feasts it was common for men to become intoxicated. Even if this was the case, it is the language of the governor of the feast and not of Jesus. One thing is absolutely true, Jesus Christ never encouraged drunkenness. It is also true that he manifested his own glory by turning water into wine. What Must I Do to Be?Lost?"? "Neglect so great salvation." It is not necessary to do anything. We are lost already. The Lord Jesus offers to save us; but if wo reject his offers we remain as we were. "How shall we escape if we neglect so great salvation ?" Escape is impossible if we neglect the only means of safety. If a deadly serpent bites you, and you refuse the only remedy, you die. If you are 'i ? **? " *'i -?iir,a_KiiAtT uruwiiiiJg ?uu vrin uui aci^c uic inu-wuvj thrown to you, you sink. Neglect is ruin. Christ alone can save the soul. "Neither is. there salvation in any other." 0, sinner! your damnation is sure if you neglect him. If he that despised Moses' law died without mercy, of how much sorer punishment shall he be thought worthy who hath trodden under foot the Son of God? Dost thou think God will not execute his threatenings, that thou canst escape his piercing eye, or that the rocks will cover thee ? Vain hopes! There is no escape but to come to Christ.?Exchange. Christian Earnestness.?What are your exertions? Are they not few and languid? An occasional retirement, a hasty performance of private devotion, a formal service at the family altar, a forgetful hearing of the word, without laboring for the meat thatendureth to everlasting life, without striving to enter in at the straight gate, without fighting the good fight of faith and taking the kingdom of heaven by force. O, this vile moderation ! this guilty relaxation ! instead of going forward, and deeming nothing done while anything remains to do! "Be faithfnl unto death, and I will give thee a crown of life." AST But is there any word for a poor creature that is in bondage through fear of death ? What shall I do in the swelling of Jordan? I tremble to meet with tbe king of terrors. To such he says "I will ransom them from the power of the grave, I will redeem them from death ! 0 death, I will be thy plagues! Ograve, I will be thy destruction ! Death shall be swallowed up in victory." Plead then, that he would do as he said. fiQ^But what says God to a poor destitute creature, who has nothing; no good, no grace, no light, no life, no strength ? He says "The needy shall not always be forgotten, and the expectations of the poor shall not perish forever." There is bread enough in your Father's house and to spare. Hath he said so ? Oh ! then put him to his word, saying, "Lord! do as thou hast said."?R. Erskine. fiST O, sirs, search the Scriptures, and study the word of God; consult and consider what he hath said ; let there be no mouldy Bibles among you; let not the dust of your Bibles witness against you. Your eternal salvation depends upon your believing what he hath said; therefore, study the faith of what he has said. SSf Life being hung on little things, its preservation is a daily miracle; and that any of us should arrive at mature age, is owing to the fact that there is an Eye upon which never sleeps, the eye of a Heavenly Father, whose loving kindness is overall his works; whose "mercies are new every morning and fresh every evenhig." JI@F There is no true rest of soul and heart in time of trial, until we have come to look beyond second causes and human instruments. and have seen the hand of God and Father appointing all, in his infinite wis-1 dom and love. ?he forhvilk #ttquirct. TKHMH OF SUBSCRIPTION: Single copy for one year, $ 2 00 For six months, 125 For three months, 75 Two copies one year 4 00 I Ten conies one vear 20 00 And an extra copy for a club of ten. How to Order the Enquirer.?Write the j name of the subscriber very plainly, give post- ; oflice, county and State, in full, and send the I amount of the subscription by draft or post- j oflice money order, or enclose'the money in a j registered letter. Postage.?The Enquirer is delivered free of postage to all subscribers residing in York county, who receive the paper at post-oflices within the county; and to all other subscribers the postage is paid by the publisher. Our subscribers, no matter where they receive the paper, are not liable for postage, it being prepaid at the post-otlice here, without additional charge to the subscriber. Watch the Figures.?The date on the "address-label" shows the time to which the sub- j scription is paid. If subscribers do not wish j their papers discontinued, the date must be kept in advance. Cash.?It must be distinctlv understood that 1 our terms for subscriptions, advertising and jobwork are cash in advance. ADVERTISING RATES. ONE DOLLAR per square for the first inser- j tion, and FIFTY CENTS per square, for each subsequent insertion. A square consists of the space occupied by seven lines of this size type. jjtSr Contracts will be made at reduced rates for advertising space to be used for three, six, or twelve months. All contract advertisements will be confined to the regular business for which the space is engaged. Rejected manuscripts will not be returned i to the writers. Persons who send manuscript to this oflice for publication and desire a copy oftho ! same, should make a duolicate. pif Tributes of Respect and Obituary notices charged for at the rate of ten cents a line. Usually there are about seven words in a line. 1886. WEST LIBERTY STREET. 1886. | Yorkville Livery and Feed Stables ARE still on a boom, and the year 188(5 finds me with some of the finest'Vehicles ever shown in the Livery business in Yorkville, and surnasssed by none. Everything will be kept in the best style. Give me a trial and be con- ; vinced. Cincinnati and Columbus Buggies Of every description will be kept. Spring Wagons, Phaetons, <fcc., of the best make, always on hand. FOR FUNERALS I have a fine Queen City Hearse and a Clarence Coach, which will be sent to any part ef the county at short notice. Terms reasonable. A Big Bargain. I have a Jumpseat Phteton and some Buggies on hand that I will give a big bargain in, if sold soon to make room for my new stock. HAVE YOUR HORSES FED At the Yorkville Livery and Feed Stables, where thev will receive the best attention. F. E. SMITH. FOraDRY AND IVXacliine Shop. 11IIE undersigned would respectfully inform the public that he now has in operation, on his lot on King's Mountain Street, a FOUNDRY ^ND MACHINE SHOP, in which he is prepared to do all manner of work in light iron and brass castings, and general machine work. REPAIRITO Of all kinds, promptly done on short notice. Steam Engines, ana agricultural machinery of any kind overhauled and repaired. Besides, any class of work that may be wanted in his shop, he will attend any call for repairing stationary engines, doing the work on the premises, thus obviating the necessity bf moving the engine. Prices reasonable. Terms, cash on completion ofthowork. EDWARD THOMAS. ^? ~CAKWNA^ST0VE~TRADEr I RESPECTFULLY inform Stove Buyers all over the Stale that I carry in stock, for Fall and Winter trade, 550 Cooking and Heating Stoves & Ranges. By actual count, requiring Store and Warehouse room, 25 by 2(50 feet to contain the stock, ana can nil oraers prompuy. COOKING STOVES FROM $8.00 UP, Warranted to give satisfaction. Best Box Heating Stoves from $2.50 Up. The goods are bought from parties who sell' large jobbing trade only, and challenge a com-, parison of quality and prices of .Stoves with any market North, South, East or West. Write for circulars giving prices and a full description of Goods, and SAVE MONEY. I am very anxious to get a sample Stove sold in every neighborhood in the State. TERMS CASH ON DELIVERY. J. I). RATTERREE, Chester, S. C. October 15 31 12m The Howe Machine Company's LIGHT RUNNING. HIGH ARM, 14 New Howe " WHICH IS THE BEST SEWING MACHINE EVER MADE. 1CALL special attention to the following features : The NEW HOWE is a new machine throughout, differing in every point from the machines heretofore manufactured by the company. The needle is self-setting. It has the most room under the arm; the perfect Howe stitch: no holes to thread, except the needle; the easiest shuttle to thread ; the most perfect take up ; the loose balance-wheel; the largest bobbin ; absolutely no vibration; the most perfect tension. It is the lightest running; noiseless, and the most pleasing in appearance. Prices within the reach of all. Call and get a descriptive circular, and see the machine, which is always on exhibition at my Photographic Gallery. PHOTOGRAPHY. I would inform the public that I am yet making PHOTOGRAPHS in all the various styles. Also, Ferrotypes and other cheaper styles of pictures. Pictures by the photographic process enlarged, and all work done in the best style of the art at reasonable prices. Gallery on "West Liberty street, near the jail. J. R. SCHORR. THE COTTON PLANT. The Only Agricultural Journal in South Carolina. AN EIGHT-PAGE, FORTY-COLUMN AGRICULTURAL JOURNAL ! ' ? Strictly and Intensely Agricultural, Fighting for and Aiding the Farmers. The attention of the Farmers' Clubs organizing now in our State is called to THE COTTON PLANT, As the only Agricultural Magazine in our State. Only GO Cents a Year. . SEND FOR SAMPLE COPIES. Address THE COTTON PLANT, Marion, S. ('. WOCH&SON'S Celebrated Fashion Catalone OCUT CDCC For Spring and Sumotrl I rtlCC mer. 1S83, ready March 10th. to any address. Illustrates and lists Re very thing for Ladles', uents', cnuurena- I and Infants' wear and Housekeeping Goods, at prices lower than those of any bouse in tne United States. Complete satisfaction Guaranteed. or money re. funded. II. C. F. KOCH <& SON, 6th Ave. & 20th St., N. V. City. March 18 10 2m HILLS AM) MILL HACIILYERY. THE undersigned respectfully informs the public that he is now fully prepared to contract for the building or repairing of FLOURING AND CORN MILLS, and to furnish upon the best terms all kinds MILL MACHINERY. He is also Agent for one of the best WATER WHEELS made in the United States, which he will sell on the most accommodating terms. Estimates furnished either in person or by mail. Address W. S. WELLS, (trover, Cleveland Co., X. C. April 1 13 4t* GARRY IRON RO< Manufacturers of all kinds of WV . IRON ROOFING iaSBBj CRIMPED AM) I'ORRl'GATED SIDING, PfiPJH Iron Tile or ftliingle, <.?' /J7 ^ FIRE PROOF DOORS, SHUTTERS 4C., THE LARGEST MANUFACTURERS 01 May 10 RELIEF ! For Forty Years A Sufferer from Catarrh. WONDERFUL TO RELATE. ^TTlOR forty years I have been a victim to G'A_|7 TARRH-three-fourths of the time a sufferer from excruciating pains across my forehead and my nostrils. The discharges were so offensive that I hesitate to mention it, except for the good it may do some other sufferer. I have spent a young fortune from my earnings during * my forty years of suffering to obtain relief from the doctors. I have tried patent medicines?every one I could learn of?from the four corners of the earth, with no relief. And AT LAST (57 years of age) have met with a remedy that has cured me entirely?made me a new man. I weighed 128 pounils and now weigh 148. I used thirteen bottles of the medicine, and the only regret I have is that being in the humble walks of life I may not have influence to prevail on all catarrh sufferers to use what has cured me, Guinn's Pioneer Blood Renewer. HENRY CHEVES. "No. 267 Second St., Macon, Ga." llXf- yT/s?nf Hm ahnvo i?ir. I1UI1IJ VUCVCO, 1/liU Hllbd v* v?av ?wv . v formerly of Crawford county, now of Macon, Georgia, merits the confidence of all interested in catarrh. W. A. HUFF, Ex-Mayor of Macon." A superb Flesh Producer and Tonic. Guinn's Pioneer Blood ftenewer Cures all Blood and Skin Diseases, Rheumatism, Scrofula, Old Sores. A perfect Spring Medicine. If not in your market it will be forwarded on receipt of price. Small bottles 81.00; large bottles m 81.75. Essay on Blood and Skin Diseases mailed free. MACON MEDICINE COMPANY, Macon, Georgia. For sale by DOWRY & STARR, Yorkville. April 8 11 ly ~c7& ~L. NARROW GAUGE RAILROADSCHEDULE of Mail and Passenger Trains from Lenoir, N. C., to Chester, S. C., taking effect at 12 o'clock, Noon, Sunday, February 7th, 1880. GOING SOUTH. Leave Lenoir t 6.00 A. M. / Arrive at Hudsonville,* 6.24 A. M. Arrive at Lovelady,* , 6.40 A. M. Arrive at Hickory, 7.10 A. M. Leave Newton 8.05 A. M. Arrive at Maiden,* 8.33 A. M. Arrive at Lincolnton, 9.10 A. M. Arrive at Hardin's* 9.43 A. M. Arrive at Dallas, 10.07 A. M. Arrive at Gastonia, 10.23 A. M. Leave Gastonia 10.40 A. M. Arrive at Crowder's Creek,* 11.07 A. M. Arrive at Clover, 11.30 A. M. Arrive at Yorkville, 12.05 P. M. Leave Yorkville, 12.25 P. M. Arrive at Guthriesville,* 12.53 P. M. Arrive at Lowrysville,* 1.30 P. M. Arrive at Chester, 2.00 P. M. GOING NORTH. J Leave Chester, 4.25 P. M. Arrive at Lowrysville, 4.65 P. M. Arrive at Guthriesville, 6.30 P. M. Arrive at Yorkville, 5.55 P. M. ? Leave Yorkville 6.10 P. M. a Arrive at Clover, 6.45 P. M. " Arrive at Crowder's Creek 7.10 P. M. Arrive at Gastonia, 7.40 P. M. Leave Gastonia, 7.55 P. M. Arrive at Dallas, 8.11 P. M. Arrive at Hardin's, 8.35 P. M. Arrive at Lincolnton, 9.00 P. M. Arrive at Maiden, 9.40 P. M. . . ? in ns p \r ^vrn v o hi ^ u? tun, - ? Leave Hickory, 10.50 P. M. Arrive at Lovelady 11.20 P. M. Arrive at Hudsonville, 11.37 P. M. Arrive at Lenoir, 12.01 A. M. * Flag Station. G. R. TALCOTT, Superintendent. February 18 7 tf JOB PRI VTIIVG. ~~ OWING to our superior facilities with the best machine presses, an abundance of type and first-class appointments throughout our office, wo are prepared to execute all manner of JOB PRINTING in superior style, and at prices that will compare with New York or Philadelphia charges for the same quality of work and materials. Wo have recently made a reduction in prices for the following classes of work, to which we invite the attention of business men: HILL HEADS. For 500 For 100k Half-sheet Bill Heads, 83.50 80.00 Fourth-sheet Bill Heads, 2.25 3.50 Sixth-sheet Bill Heads, 2.00 3.00 Monthly statementsat same price of sixth-sheet J Dill heads. We will till an order for bill heads, giving any desired number of either size of sheet at proportionate prices. LETTER. HEADS. For 500 For 1000 ^ Commercial Note, $2.15 83,2.5 Packet Note, .....2.25 3.50 Letter (large size) 3.00 5.00 For the above work we use a superior quality of paper, and guarantee entire satisfaction in every instance. We also give special attention to the printing of Briefs, Arguments and Points and Authorities, which we furnish strictly according to the requirements of the Justices of the Supreme Court, and in proof reading exercise the utmost care to ensure accuracy. We are prepared to furnish all other kinds of printing, from a visiting card to a large volume, and will be pleased to furnish estimates for any style of work desired. Address, L. M. GRIST, Yorkville, S. C, TIIE STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA, COUNTY OF YORK - COURT OF COMMON PLEAS. > William E. Erwin and George J. Steele, Administrators of George Steele, deceased, Plaintiffs, against Samuel E. Bratton, Robert E. Bratton, William E. Bratton, Jerome B. Bratton, Rebecca I. B. Ashcraft, John A. Bratton, John S. Bratton, J. Rufus Bratton, Napoleon B. Bratton, Martha E. Lowry, Mary C. Lowry, Sophia C. O'Bannon, Elizabeth De Loach, Jane E. Williams, Agnes B. Harris, Camilla A. Erwin, and Harriet J. Dixon, Defendants.? Su,7nmons for ReliefComplaint not Served. To the Defendants above-named, the first six being non-residents: \r0U are hereby summoned and required to answer the Complaint in this action, which is herewith this day tiled in the office of the Clerk of the Court of Common Pleas, for said County, and to serve a copy of your answer to the said Complaint on the subscriber, at his office in Yorkvillo, South Carolina, within twenty days , after the service hereof, exclusive of the day of ^ such service; and if you fail to answer the Complaint within the time aforesaid, the Plaintiff in this action will apply to the Court for the relief demanded in the Complaint. [Summons and Complaint filed March 15,1880. Jos. F. Wallace, C. C. Pis.] Dated Yorkville, S. C., March 15, A. D. 1880. C. E. SPENCER, Plaintiffs' Attorney. March 18 11 Gt THE STATE OF~S?lTH CAROLINA, COUNTY OF YORK?COURT OF COMMON PLEAS. Anderson Earwood, individually, and as Administrator of Charlotte Gaston, deceased, Plaintiff, against Betsie Carroll, Mary A. Settles, Meliah Trantham, Thomas Earwood, Riley Earwood, Oma Enloe, Andrew Gladden, John Ramsey and Holly Ann Ramsey, Defendants.?Summons for Relief?Complaint not served. To the Defendants above-named, all being nonresidents : YOU are hereby summoned and required to answer the Complaint in this action, which is this day herewith tiled in the office of the Clerk of the Court of Common Pleas for the said county, and to serve a copy of your Answer to the said Complaint on the subscriber, at hisoflicein Yorkville, South Carolina, within twenty days after the service hereof, exclusive of the "day of such service; and if you fail to answer the Complaint within the time aforesaid, the Plaintiff in this action will apply to the Court for the re- J lief demanded in the Complaint. ^ Dated Yorkville, S. C'., March 15, A D., 1880. C, E. SPENCER, Plaintiffs Attorney. March 25 12 6t NOTICE TO CREDITORS. ^ ALL and singular the creditors of MARY AL- r DERSON, deceased, are notified that they are required to establish their claims before me, under the orderof the Court of Common Pleas for York county, S. C., in the cause of "Lueretia Giles vs. John Alderson et on or before the tenth day of May next, at my office in York C. II., 8. C., at 12 M., or be debarred. Yorkville, 8. C., April G, 18SG. JOS. F. WALLACE, C. C. Pis., Special Referee. Hart & Wilborn, P. Attorneys. April G 14 5t HOW TO SAVE ONE DOLLAR. A NY person who desires to subscribe for the ^ Enquirer, and will send us his name, together with the name of a friend or neighbor, accompanied by $4.00, we will send to their addresses, the Enquirer for one year from the (late of receipt. CHATTEL MORTGAGES, MORTGAGES of Real Estate, and Titles to Real Estate. For sale at the ENQUIRER OFFICE. March 25 12 tf OFING COMPANY, .J IRON ORE PAINT And. Cement. 152 TO 158 MERWIN STREET Cleveland., O. ^ W fin- Send for Circular and Price ' List No. 75. .. 1 IRON ROOFING IN THE WORLD. y iy A