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. i.ewis m. ?rist, proprietor. J ^it Initejiralient ^arnilo ftetospaper: Jfor % ^romatira trf t|e political, Social, Agricultural anir Commercial Interests of t|e j$ont{). jTERMS--$2.50 A TEAR, IN ADVANCE. VOL. 38. YOEKVTLLE, S. C., THURSDAY, JUNE 8, 1883. NO. 33. Selected factrg. THE KING OF THE PLOW. PAUL H. HAYNE. The sword is re-sheathed in its scabbard, Tne rive hangs safe on the wall; No longer we quail at the hungry Hot rush of the ravenous ball? The war cloud has hurled its last lightning, Its last awful thunders are still, While the Dernou of Conflict in Hades Ides fettered in force as in will: Above the broad fields that he ravaged, What monarch rules blissfully now ? Oh! crown him with bays that are bloodless, The King, the brave King of the Plow ! A King ! aj'e ! what Ruler more poteut Has ever swayed earth by his nod? A monarch ! aye, more than a monarch? A homely, but bountiful God ! He stands where in earth's sure protection The seed- grains are scattered and sown, To uprise in serene resurrection When Spring ber suit trumpet has blown. A monarch ! yea, more than a monarch, Tnough toil drops are thick on his brow; O! crown him with corn-leaf and wheat-leaf, The King, the strong King of the Plow ! Through the shadow ard shine of past ages, (While tyrants were blinded with blood) He reared the pure ensign of Ceres Bv meadow, and mountain, and flood? And the long, leafy gold of his harvests The earth sprites uudair sprites had spun Grew rhythmic when swept by the breezes, Grew royal when kissed by the sun ; Before the stern charm of his patience What rock-rooted forces must bow ! Come ! crown him with corn-leaf and wheat-leaf, The King, the bold King of the Plow! Through valleys of balm-dropping myrtles, By banks of Arcadian streauis. Where the wind-songs are set to the mystic Mild murmurof passionless dreams; On the storm-haunted uplands of Thule, On ice-girdled fiords and floes, Alike speeds the spell of his godhood, The bloom of his heritage glows ; A monarch ! yea, more than a monarch? All climes to his prowess must bow; Come! crown him with bays that are stainless? The King, the brave King of the Plow ! Far, far in earth's uttermost future, N As boundless of splendor as scope, I see the fair Angol?Fruition, Outspeed his high heralds ot Hope; The roses of joy rain around him, The lilies of sweetness and calm, For the sword has been changed to the plow-share, The lion lias down with the lamb! O angel majestic ! We know thee, Though raised and transfigured art thou? This lord of life's grand consummation IY<is once the swart King of the Plow ! the Jtorg idler. FLEEING FROM A FORTUNE. The sun rose propitiously on Grace Sylvester's wedding morn; the air was balmy, the sky blue, and all nature seemed in sympathy with the happy day. Presently a stir awoke in the household, that soon swelled into a murmur of consternation. The bride was missing. Some one had gone to her chamber to awaken her and found it empty. Immediately a search was instituted, which proved fruitless. The bridegroom was sent for, but could offer no explanation ; like the parents, he was distracted with anxiety. Grace Sylvester was a proud, impulsive girl, with a warm heart and impetuous temi>er. She was an only child, and somewhat spoiled, ..a woo notm~.il hut. nfit.hirxr that, could be im agined or adduced could account for this unheard-of freak ; she had not even fastened a .note on the toilet-cushion, as a key to the mystery, after the custom of heroines. For a week previous to this now unlucky day, the Sylvester mansion had continuously opened its hospitable portals to arriving guests. Friends and relations of Mr. Frank Howard, the expectant bridegroom, crowded to do honor to the occasion, which the Sylvester connection were not less eager to embellish with their presence. This singular occurrence, therefore, could not possibly be preserved a secret, and the chagrined and distracted host and hostess had all the added misery of knowing that their daughter's inexplicable flight was the subject of all [ sort3of surmises and discussions by those who in set phrase, endeavored to condole with them, and, at the same time, hint at insanity as the only solution of such an unprecedented freak. But a special gleam was soon destined to illumine the darkness. Grace had not been unmindful of her dear parents, and her devoted lover. A letter, addressed to the former, had been dropped by her, in the post office. It was brief, and evidently written under the pressure of excitement; but, even in its fragmentary haste, Mr. and Mrs. Sylvester could trace their daughter's tenderness ; and her lover, despite the undisputed mystery of its tone, took consolation from it. Its contents may be rendered thus : She had left of her own free will and unaccompanied, though she admitted that she would be met at her journey's end by a wor thy guardian, in wliose care she would remain, and who, at the expiration of a week, would bring her home again ; until then, she begged they would wait for her explanation, and, above all, forgive any pain or annoyance her hasty disappearance had caused. This epistle, though gratefully received, since it assured them of her safety, was not, of course, entirely satisfactory to her parents and lover. Despite her promise to return, they could not remain quiet until the expiration of the time named, but sought her in every conceivable place ; but, as was evident from the security of her retreat, Grace did not mean to be found till after the interval she had named. One by one, or in small parties, as they had come, the wedding guests departed. They carried to their own houses a charmingly inexhaustible theme for gossip and wonderment. Every one held a separate solution and theory, aiid the subject promised to be one of unusual variety and entertainment. But only one of them possessed any clue to the truth?and she, shy, insidious plotter that she was, had laid a train whose success promised even beyond her hopes. She watched its development in silence. It was not her cue to speak, but to await the fulfillment of her design, and so she lingered, professing the intensest sympathy for all, and at the same time contriving to bestow the most of it on Frank Howard, her distant cousin. This young lady, May Prescott, by name, ? had long been hopelessly in love with her cousin Frank. She knew that his heart was devoted to another, but had never had an oi>portunity of seeing her rival till the generous and unsuspecting Grace, wishing to give both her and Frank pleasure, had asked her, by letter, to be one of her bridesmaids. May's darling object was then gained. She had unlimited faith in her own |>ower of creating discord, and had secretly resolved to sei>arate the lovers and win Frank for herself, even at the eleventh hour. Her first interview with Grace convinced her that ardent and impulsive generosity was the strong point of her character. On this she acted. "How oddly the gifts of fate are distributed !" said she, with a sigh, as they were talking together the night before the wedding. "One would think it was enough to get a beautiful wife, without grasping at a great fortune, too ; but then Frank always had a keen eye for the main chance." Grace's face flushed a deep, indignant crimson ; her full, bright eyes flashed with sudden anger as she looked at May Prescott steadily. "Pray explain yourself, Miss Prescott," she said. "I do not understand you in the least." "What! have you never heard of the will of Frank's eccentric old Uncle Paul V But 1 am sorry; i>erhaps I have done wrong in mentioning it. No doubt he meant to deceive you? no, no! I don't mean that?1 mean, perhaps he did not wish you to know." She affected to be overcome with confusion at her own inadvertence, and pretended to regret having said so much. Grace quietly but firmly demanded to know all. "You have said too much to recede!" she exclaimed. "Tell me all there is to tell." This was just the opportunity May desired. j She arose to see that the door was closed ; then 1 satisfied that she and Grace were alone togethj er, she poured into her victim's ear the story whose result was Grace's flight from home. The week passed anxiously enough to the three people who were awaiting the wayward bride's return. The appointed day came, and early in the morning a carriage stopped before the Sylvester mansion, and Grace alighted from it, followed by an old nurse, of whom she had always been fond, and whose presence explained the fact that Grace had been staying in her home, not five miles away. Grace walked into the house with an air of miugled triumph and deprecation. After the strange greetings were over, Mr. Sylvester, with attempted sternness, demanded the promised explanation, and this was the story: "The night before my wedding day I learned from some one who thought I already knew it, that Frank was about to inherit S100,000 upon a strange condition. Tlis uncle had died and left that amount to him provided he married me within a year after the testator's death. "I had never seen this uncle, but, as I learned from my informant, he had met me by chance in one of the New York hospitals, and, after taking the trouble to inquire my name, and no doubt, satisfying himself of the suitability of the connection, he made up his eccentric mind that Frank should marry me or lose a large fortune in the event of disobeying his command. "Now, though I am deeply obliged for the distinguished honor meant me by the deceased, I positively decline to l)e bartered away to any one at a stated price. "It was sufficiently embarrassing to me to know that the old gentleman was attracted by a whim of mine, and mistook it for characteristic virtue. The fact is, during that winter? my first in New York?I was seized with a nr.Tr rAimd r?f > .10'l Q11 V\V fttl !lf lilliujr tu vai j iuj iv/uuu wi. V(, .... ? ternoon among the sick, to whom I carried the ever welcome gift of fruits, and it was while I was distributing these offerings that the matrimonial project occurred to Frank's uncle. "Do you not understand, and can you not sympathize with me ? Had I remained here, no explanation could have altered the case, and I should inevitably have become Frank's bride, under conditions alike painful to my love of truth and self-resect. I have always declared I would be loved for myself alone, not for qualities I did not possess, nor the money of a whimsical old gentleman.'" She drew a long breath as she finished her recital, and held out her hand with her own winning frankness. "The last week of the year expired yesterday," she said, with an unmistakable sparkle of triumph in her handsome eyes. "If you take me now, Frank, it must be all for love. There's no longer any money in the question." "With all my heart!" cried the indulgent lover. "Since you have come back to me of your own free will, and have no further objec| tions to make to our union, I consider myself one of the happiest and most fortunate of bridegrooms." He caught Grace's pretty, unreluctaut hand in his and pressed it rapturously to his lips, with a smile quite as triumphant as her own, and a glance, whose intense and mischievous meaning was not explained until after the ciuiet wedding, at which May Prescott was the only guest, for Sir. and Sirs. Sylvester's prudence and worldly wisdom still condemned their impulsive daughter's escapade, though their partial tenderness forgave it. "You have chosen poverty in preference to wealth," they said, "and so you must be content to do without the grand wedding Ave had contemplated." Grace submitted Avith the best humor possible ; she had tested Frank's love and gained her own end, and all aa'jis bright before her inexperienced eyes. After the wedding, Frank asked his bride : "Are you quite satislied with your choice of poverty, and glad that your marriage occurred to-day instead of a Aveek ago ?" "I am perfectly delighted," Grace answered. "Will you take a little Avedding gift from me, as I have not yet presented you Avith one V" Frank asked, meekly. "With pleasure," Grace ansAvered, as she extended her hand expecting to receive a jewel case. But, instead of that, a ponderous legal document was produced, at Avhich Grace gazed in blank surprise. Then Frank explained that, despite Miss Prescott's kind interest in their affairs, the fortune was not lost, as she had made a slight mistake in dates ; and his uncle's discernment in selecting so charming a Avife for him had made him the happiest of men. May Prescott's chagrin at the failure of her conspiracy, and the delight of Grace's parents at her good fortune can easily be imagined. Grace l>ore her partial defeat with charming equanimity, as she Avas quite convinced, by some mental process of her own, that she had her husband's loA*e. So she Avas reconciled to the possession of a fortune ! Canibalimi in Fiji.?It Avas only people who had been killed that were considered good for food. Those who died a natural deatn were never eaten?invariably buried. But it certainly is a wonder that the isles were not altogether depopulated, owing to the number who were killed. Thus, in Namena, in the year 1851, fifty bodies were cooked for one feast. And when the men of Bau were at war with Verata they carried of *200 bodies, seventeen of which were piled on a canoe and sent ! to Ttewa, where they were received with wild [ joy, dragged about the town and subjectj ed to every species of indignity ere they reached the ovens. Then, too, just think of the number of lives sacrificed in a country where infanticide was a recognized institution, and where widows were strangled as a matter of course! Why, on one occasion, when there had been a horrible massacre of Namena people at Viwa, and upwards of 100 fishermen had been murdered, and their bodies carried as bnkota to the ovens at Bau, no less than eighty women were strangled to do honor to the dead, and corpses lay in every direction about the mission station. It is just thirty years since the ltev. John Watsford, writing from here, described how twenty-eight victims had been seized in one day while fishing. They were brought here alive ami were only stunned when put into the oven. .Some of the miserable wretches attempted to escape from the scorching bed of red-hot stones, but only to be driven back and buried in that livimr tomb, whence they were taken out to feast their barbarous captors. He adds * that more human beings were eaten on this little isle of Bau than anywhere else in Fiji. It is very hard, indeed, to realize that the peaceful village on which I am now looking, has really been the scene of such horrors as these, and that many of the gentile, kindly i>eople around me have actually taken part in them. Influence of Newspapers.?A schoolteacher, who has been a long time engaged in j his profession and witnessed the influence of a newspaper on the minds of a family of chili dren, writes as follows : 1 have found it to be i a universal fact, without exception, that those j scholars, of both sexes and all ages, who have access to newspapers at home, when compared I with those who have not, are : First. Better readers, excellent in pronun| ciation ; have consequently read more, and i understanding^. Second. They are letter spellers, and define I words with ease and accuracy. Third. They obtain practical knowledge of geography in almost half the time it requires ! <?f niliPis. as the newspapers have made them j acquainted with the location of the important places of nature, their government, and doings : on the globe. Fourth. They are better grammarians, for, i having become so familiar with every style in I the newspapers, from the commonplace adverj tisements to the finished and classical oration i of the statesman, they more readily compre: hend the meaning of the text, and consequent1 ly analyze its construction with accuracy, i Fifth. They write better compositions, us! ing better language, correctly expressed. Sixth. Those young men who have for years been readers of newspapers, and are always j taking the lead in debating societies, exhibit a ' more extensive knowledge upon a greater variety of subjects, and express their views with ' greater fluency, clearness and correctness. fUadiug. I THE BOY as HE EXISTS IX STATE of XATVRE? Ills ORIGIN, HABITS AND PECULIARITIES. j [Essay read before the Ninty-Six Literary Club.] j It would seem that if Xature taxed her re-1 j sources in any one direction more than in I another, when she spake all things into exis- j | tence, it was in giving variety to the different; | objects of her creation. After every thing j had been made and the divine plaudit, "Be! liniH nil tinnrrs jiro vprv croud." had been pro nounced, in order that a grand creative climax might be readied, it was determined to gather up all the odds and ends, together with the various raspings and filings that lay scattered throughout the vast laboratory of Nature, and form them into one symmetrical whole. This creative effort was exhaustive and complete. The result was a Boy. It is a stupendous fact that all of the antagonistic principles found in Nature are blended in the character of the Boy, and in such a way that each principle retains its distinctive characteristics. Would you have an example to prove that the opposite principles do exist side by side in this last and most complicated of all the works of the Great Architect ? Just call on a Boy of twelve Summers and request him with his friend Fido to rid the premises of a few cats, and then send him to dig a few potatoes for dinner; and mark the difference in his movements. Or take one of sixteen and see with what complacency and satisfaction he cultivates the little fuzz which has begunto sprout upou his upper lip; and then see him again as he sits in one corner watching with jealous eye his rival who is having a good time generally with his girl in the opposite corner. Note the change in his countenance and general behavior. Again, if you would like to see a picture of extreme awkwardness, tenderness, and love, combined with fear and apprehension, just contemplate for a moment Biy Btibby nursing little baby sister. But as I propose further on in this essay to treat more at length of the habits and peculiarities of the Boy, I will revert again to his origin. THAT TIIE HOY WAS NOT MADE AMONG THE FIItST, nor even at the same time with any of the other creatures, but was entirely a subsequent consideration, we have the most convincing circumstantial evidence. It cannot be supposed, that he existed during the formative period of creation, while matter was yet plastic and before it had hardened into organic life. For if he had existed then, possessing so much innate thoughtlessness and carelessness as he does, would he not have overturned the whole establishment and left it in one mass of confusion ? Or, possessing such a great instinctive propensity to gratify his natural curiosity, would not his finger marks have been indelibly impressed upon every thing that came within his reach ? But some objector will ask, 'Mi mere was no oo^ men how will you explain the fact that rabbits have no tails ? Or, who plucked out the tail of the bunty hen ? or who knocked off the muly cow's horns?" Well, it must be confessed that these look wonderfully like the pranks of a Boy. But the proof of the contrary is so convincing that we are obliged to refer them to the apparent whims of Nature, which makes things to differ simply that they may be differeut. Would not the fraternal relations, which exist in Paradise soon have , ceased to t>e fraternal had the Boy been present ? Would he and Fido not have formed an , alliance, which would have made old Tabby "git up and git ?" And would not the robbiu and lark have had to hide out; while the ; lizzard as lie basked in the sunshine of oblivi- J ous contentment would have had to keep one eye on duty whilst the other slept ? And even j the old bull-frog perched upon his little tussock, as he warbled forth his notes of praise > and thanksgiving, would have had to have kept his ears well open to catch the stealthy footfall of the Boy, as (with stone in hand) lie crept softly up behind a neighboring log. And ; who can believe (if a stone could have been found) that old Jack would not have been moping about the grounds with but one eye? 1 The pig with his leg done up in splints would have been hobbling around 011 crutches. ; While the Boy would prove an expert in all the above particulars, it would be in the character of Itansy Sniffle (see Georgia Scenes) j that he would appear most at home. For him to originate a ditlieultybetween the patriarchs of the herd or of the dock would afford genuine pleasure; and from some some place of safety to witness them test the hardness of their heads would furnish him infinite delight. * - 1 1- T 1 But the crowning argument, ami tne iasi i shall oifer, that THE 150Y WAS THE LAST OF ALL THINGS CHEATED, is that the apple was left to ripen before it was pulled. Had there been a boy present, that apple would have disappeared before it fairly turned. Of course, the Boy would have assert- : ed his own innoceucy, and saddled it off on the monkey, who is second only to the Boy in his pranks. 80 we may safely conclude that the Boy was not in the garden. But [ after every thing else had been made and the entire machinery put in full operation, then the Boy made his apjiearance. From that time until Noah entered the Ark we have the most unmistakable evidence of his presence. That IIE WAS NOT ADMITTED INTO THE AUK, we feci assured ; for while the Ark was amply sufficient to hold all of the beasts both clean and unclean ; yet if the Boy had been crowded in, forty-eight hours would not have passed before such a stir would have been created among the animals, that while the Boy clinging in safety to a rafter above, enjoying the general confusion below, old Noah would have been seriously considering whether it would be better for him to be drowned outside or devoured alive inside. Then what became of the Boy V He was evidently not drowned nor devoured by the beasts of the ark ; for ;is soon as dry land appears, the Boy appears also. It would be hard to make a railroad conductor of the present day believe that if Noah had searched the nooks and corners outside the ark, he would not have discovered the Boy fixed up for a free ride. From the Hood through all of the succeeding generations, up to the present time, the Boy has given the ..e 1.: IUI1CSI eviuciiuea Ul ma pn-acutc. hc imir now concluded the history of the boy's origin. In treating of his habits and peculiarities, THE Sl'lSJECT NATURALLY DIVIDES ITSELF | INTO THREE DISTINCT PERIODS 1 which we will consider separately. The first! I period is the time which elapses between the I ages of twelve and sixteen years ; the second, I between sixteen and eighteen ; and the third j period is fro in eighteen until he developes into a man, which ordinarily takes place between the ages of twenty-one and twenty-live, depending entirely upon the amount of common j sense which he has at his command. "We will ! take the average boy as we come in contact i with him in our every day intercourse, leaving i enough of margin on the other hand for those | who are better, and on the other for those who i are worse. The first tiling we notice as characteristic of the Hoy in TIIE FIRST PERIOD | is his hat, which though not an old one, has j i the greater part of the crown torn out 'and j | with only a few detached pieces of the brim i j left. This dilapidated state of things was j I brought about by a recent effort on the part i j of the Boy to teach his friend Fido how to I futnli .nut rai'pv Tip nnlv tstmrlit him hnw to i I ItlVII V.IUIJ. W...J w...p - .. . I carry, however. But if there is any one thing ! j more characteristic of him in this stage of his j existence than another, it is his pants and the I ! manner in which lie wears them. Each leg is ; i rolled up just high enough not to hide the; | large patches of new cloth of different colors ' which adorn the knees. And as his pants are j entirely destitute of buttons, they are held j together at the top by a skewer manufactured | out of a six-penny nail, which is almost at-1 taclied to the front end of one of the suspen- j ders. The other suspender serves to hold the j tongue of his wagon in its place. Now let him face about a little and you will see that the other end of the former suspender is fas teneil to another skewer similar to the one mentioned above. We will also find two more patches, if anything, Larger than those in front. But without stopping to locate them, we will pass to the contents of his pockets, which as curiosities are only second to the Boy himself. Upon examination, the first thing discovered is a whirligig made of the bottom of an old blacking box. Then comes his strings attached to each end ; after that a hame-string which his father has been inquiring about for the last three days. This latter constitutes his whip thong, though he never uses it about the house, for reasons best known to himself. Then come whip-lashes and old shoe-strings without number, toward the bottom, an old knife-blade, and last, but not least in his estimation, are several nails, some sharp and others a little flattened at the end. With these he picks out his walnut and hickory-nut goodies. In the other pocket are a set of new traptriggers, his quill for blowing, and half a dozen old ribs from the carcass of a dead horse. These last he calls his bones and prizes them very highly. If we will prosecute our examination a little further we will be sure to find the nail stumped off of a toe of one foot and a stone bruise on the heel of the other. There is nothing which a lopy dislikes more than washing his face in the morning, unless it be washing his feet at night. If any one doubts the existence of A SPECIAL PROVIDENCE IN REIIALF OF THE BOY, we refer him to the many narrow escapes he makes in turning the sharp angles in the progress of events, with only a skinned nose, a blackened eye, or a patched head. Otherwise for these light afflictions would be substituted broken limbs, broken heads, and broken necks. During this stage of the Boy's existence he makes his first acquaintance with the world around mm ; ana as ne nas no experience 01 his own, lie takes hold of and appropriates to himself everything that is new and striking. Hence we find him imitating the vices rather than the virtues of those with whom he associates. After two years' experience, when he has reached the latter part of this first stage of boyish existence, another examination of pockets will reveal a wonderful change. The whirligigs, strings, and nails have all disappeared ; and in their stead will be found an old pijie, crumbs of tobacco, a few stumps of cigars, most likely a pack of cards, and an old pistol. Before starting for the cows in the afternoon he is sure to add a few matches. He is hardly out of sight before he lights up his old pipe, or the stump of a cigar. At this age he also learns to chew tobacco ; and when off to himself he tries to curse a little, which is quite awkward and startling to himself at first. These little accomplishments he thinks necessary to back up the soft and tender down which he has discovered breaking out upon his chin and upper lip. He now approaches THE SECOND PEKIOD mentioned above, into which he passes by such easy graduations that you would hardly suspect the fact, were it not for the smell of cologne with which he has saturated his bandanna and the amount of sweet smelling oils with which he has perfumed his hair. What wonderful results would be accomplished if a boy during this stage of his life would put even one half of the care and labor on the inside of his head which he bestows on the outside. If you were to examine his pockets again, you would find at least your double handful of kiss verses and pieces of poetry cut from newspapers, and, it may be an effort on his part at an acrostic on the name of his sweet-heart. You are sure to find a rosebu pinned to the lapel of his coat. And as he is a school boy at this age, if you will find and examine his text books, you will find the name of his sweetheart inscribed on every liage. The truth is, he is desperately in love ; and if he thought he had to wait until he was twenty-one before he and his dear could be united in the holy bands of wedlock, he would actually give up in despair. This is iiis first genuine matrimonial paroxysm, and while it lasts the Boy is decidedly in a precarious condition. All of this is new material growing out of the nature and circumstances attending the particular stage of the Boy's life which we are now considering. He also retains all of the most objectionable features of that stage through which he has already passed. Between the ages of sixteen and eighteen years, the one absorbing, controlling thought with the Boy is, how to look lovely. To have all of the girls in love with him is now the Alpha and Omega of his aspirations. If he could be auctioned off during this interesting period of his existence at his true value and then resold at his own estimate of himself, what a handsome fortune would be realized ! Fortunately this stage of the Boy's existence is of short duration. A Rattlesnake Romance.?A place called Cobham's Rocks, near Warren, Penn., is the home of thousands of rattlesnakes. Every year hnnters go out to kill them, and the slaughter is unbounded. A lire set among the leaves and brushes will drive the snakes out by the hundred, and a sight of them fleeing in terror from the flames is said to be something frightful. But the place is also the scene of a rattlesnake romance, and the following story is told of it : . A party of young people, returning from a basket picnic on the island, stopped on the hillside to gather wild flowers. Two young men and a woman sat down on a large rock to rest. In reaching out his hand to -a bed of moss, one of the young men touched something cold and clammy. Instinctively lie knew that he had placed his hand upon a rattlesnake. At the same instant the snake was discovered I by the other young man and the young woman. Both screamed and ran from the s}K>t. It was a critical moment, but the first young man proved equal to the emergency. Knowing that if he removed his hand the snake would sting him to death, he pressed his arm downward with all his strength, at the same time reaching into his jmcket for a knife. Before he could open the knife with his teeth the snake had wound itself about his arm. "Run and help him," screamed the young woman to the young man by her side. "Go kill the snake !" The young man, however, had really no desire to die, hut remained at a safe distance and shouted lustily for help. "I'll go myself !" exclaimed the young woman, springing forward. Her services were not needed. Pale to the lips with the pain caused by the tightening folds of the snake, the young man coolly cut off the snake's head with the knife which he had opened between his teeth. The snake was nearly six feet in length and was so strong that the young man's arm w;ts black and blue for a month afterward. The sequel need not be detailed. The young woman accepted the brave young man, and both have lived happily together ever since. Thesnake's skin, cured and stuffed, occupies a shelf in their parlor. The other young man, driven desperate by the young woman's choice, wandered away Westward. lie is now serving out a term in the Kansas legislature. Managing a Man.?Before the husbands are admitted to the charmed circle of "The Household," I have a few hints to the ladies that may be of some service. You know that these "lords of creation" have but very litt'e i patience, hardly a grain compared to what women have, so on very slight provocation sometimes will tly into a rage and say things that are not very easy to hear, and here is the time to get the advantage. Keep cool, lips closed, let not an unkind word escape. It may be an effort, but you can, for women hardly ever give up what they undertake, and take r?-.*r lirnwl f.tr if in ltruu t.li:in llillf mi lxilir fllMV I mj num wi ii, ... - will In; at your knees begging forgiveness. -Viid if, by any means you should let a few hasty words slip and the tables are turned, just get him up the nicest dinner you are capable of, and you will reach his hear'- and be sailing along as peaceably as ever. And if by any means dinner may be a little late, be sure and have the table set, and he will take the pa]>er and wait an hour, whereas, the table not l>eing spread, he can hardly wait ten minutes. If you have biscuit to bake get them out of sight about the time of his coming around, for he will be likely to exclaim, "What, bread to bake yet!" not knowing that a smart woman, with a hot oven, can have them ready to eat in fifteen minutes, and good ones, too. SOME SOUTHWESTERN PROVINCIALISMS. Rev. H. W. Pierson, in his book, "In the Brush," says: "In attending a conference, presbytery, association or other ecclesiastical meeting in the wilds of the country, as the old veteran and other preachers were pointed out to me by some friend, he would say : " 'That is Father A . He is an old Brush-Breaker''?and all the younger men would press forward to shake his hand and do him honor; or, 'That is brother B . He has broken a right smart chance of brush or, 'That is young brother C , wonderfully self-satisiied and conceited as you see. The sisters have ilattered him so much that he has 'big head' badly. He will be sent to Brush College to break brush a year or two, and he will come back humbled, and make a laborious and useful man.' This use of the ed, and Dot in the cradle calls yon grandpa, you are "the boy" so long as mother lives. You are the children of the old home. Nothing can crowd you out of your mother's heart. You may have failed in the battle of life, and your manhood may have been crushed out against the wall of circumstances ; you may have been prosperous, gained wealth and fame; but mother's love has followed you always. Many a "boy" has not been home for five or ten or twenty years. And all this time mother has been waiting. Ah, who does not know the agony expressed by that word V She may be even now saying, "I dreamed of my John last night. May be he will come to-day. He may drop in for dinner ;" and the poor, trembling hands prepare some favorite dish for him. Dinner comes and goes, but John comes not with it. Thus, day after day, month after month, year after year, passes, till at hist, "hope deferred maketh the heart sick," aye, sick unto death ; the feeble arras are stretched out no longer. The dim eyes are closed, the gray hairs smoothed for the last time, and the tired hands are folded for everlasting rest, and the mother waits no more on earth for one who comes not. God grant that she may not, in vain, wait for his coming in the heavenly home. Once more I say unto you, boys, go home if only for a day. Let your mother know you have not forgotten her. Next winter may cover her grave with snow. MAN ANIMNSECTS. The only nerves fworth mentioning) in the human body which are not under the control of the brain, are those of the heart and other internal organs ; and over these parts, as everybody knows, we have not any voluntary power. But all our limbs and muscles are moved in accordance with the impulses sent down from the brain, so that for instance, when I have made up my mind to send a tele-' gram to a friend, my legs take me duly to the telegraph office, my hand writes the proper message, and my tongue undertakes the necessary arrangements with the clerk. But in the insect's body there is no such regular subordination of the parts composing the nervous system to a single central organ or head office. The largest knot of nerve matter it is true, is generally to be found in the neighborhood of the sense organs, and it receives direct nerve bundles from the eyes, attenme, mouth and other chief adjacent parts ; but the wings and legs are moved by separate knots of nerve cells, connected by a sort of spinal cord with the head, but capable of acting quite independently on their own account. Thus, if we cut off a wasp's head and stick it on a needle in front of some sugar and water, the mouth will greedily begin to eat the sweet syrup, ap1.. nn/iAiio/iinna nf tlio fa of that. if has brush enters largely into the figures of speecli of the i>eople of the Southwest. "In returning from church, a young circuit-rider said tome: 'Didn't you think the bishop got badly brushed in the first part of the sermon V I sometimes get so brushed in my sermons that I think I will never try to preach again, it's a comfort to a beginner to know that an old preacher sometimes gets brushed.' "Figurative language of this kind abounded among the people of the Southwest, and was very expressive. These provincialisms had usually grown out of the peculiar life and habits of the people. Many of them seem to have orignated in the perils of early flat-boat navigation?when they were accustomed to float down-stream by day-light, and tie up to some stump or tree for the night! Hence, as I suppose, this provincialism. If I made inquiries in regard to the character of a man who been recommended to me for a Bible distributor, I was not told that he was a reliable or unreliable man, but 'He'll do to tie to,' or 'lie won't do to tie to;' and if the case was particularly bad, 'He won't do to tie to in a calm, let alone a storm.' As there were so many perils in this kind of navigation, those were regarded as extremely fortunate who reached their destination in safety, and could send back word that they made the trip; hence, 'to make the trip' was a universal synonym for success. And so, when a novice attempted to make a speech, preach a sermon, address a jury, or engage in any kind of business, the people predicted his success or failure by saying 'He'll make the trip' or 'lie won't make the trip.' They never said of a young man, or an old widower, that he was addressing or courting a lady, but 'He is setting to her,' a figure of speech derived from bird-hunting with setter-dogs, I suppose. When such a suit has been unsuccessful, they do not say the lady rejected or 'mitened' her suitor, but 'She kicked him.' ? When many persons were striving for the same object, or where there were rival aspirants for the heart and hand of the same lady, they said of the successful one, "The tallest pole takes the persimmon.' " A Humorist on the Taruiff.?During the recent debate 011 the tariff question, Congressman Cox, of New York edified the House with the following humorous remarks: Before I call attention to these taxes on the babies, I desire to say that if I had a child and he did not oppose theso high tariff bounties I would disown him. [Laughter.] The little girl cannot play with her doll, nor the boy whiz his top, nor the mother wash her offspring with soap, except at an expense of from one-third to one-half of their cost for the domestic privilege. [Laughter.] If the mother gives her child castor-oil she pours down 158 per cent, ad valorem, [Laughter;] if the child does not enjoy the dose, there is a '25 per cent, bowl as the recipient of the contents of its tender stomach. And though she "wash it with niter and take to it much soap, yet the iniquity is marked before me, s<*ith the Lord," for the soap is taxed 40 per cent.! God help the child! Mr. Townsend, of Illinois. How about candy ? Mr. Cox, of New York. I am coming to that in a moment, my honey. [Great laughter.] ' * ' -' au. II Sne wraps U1U iiiuc ueux m ^iaiu uiuibued cotton night-shirt, it has a nightmare of 5? cents per square yard specific, [laughter;] when the child awakes in the morning fretful, she combs its little head at 35 cents ad valorem, [laughter;] if she would amuse it she rolls it over a Brussels carpet at 90 cents per square yard, or gives it confectionery made of refined sugar at 4 cents a pound tax, and 25 per cent, ad valorem; if it tears its little panties, the gentleman from Pennsylvania [Mr. Kelley] sews them up with spool-thread taxed at threequarters of its value. [Laughter] Why, if she used a shingle to bring the little "toddling, wee thing" to its senses, as the honorable gentlemen can recall, the cost would be at the rate of 17 per cent, taxation. [Laughter.] If the youngster has a patriotic inclination on our Fourth of July, his fire-crackers are taxed as patriotic luxury at ?1 extra a box, and the bunting which furnishes the Dag, though but 23 cents a pound, costs 121 per cent, extra, while the band plays on instruments taxed at 30 cents. She takes him to the menagerie to study natural history. There is the zebra, symbolic of a mixed ad valorem and specific, [laughter,] and the stately giraffe, high protection, [laughter,J the royal tiger and unicorn of Holy Writ are 20 per cent. And the procession of elephants! Every one 20 per cent. True, Jumbo, for purposes not to be mentioned, is excluded on the affidavit of a consistent protectionist 1 but the log-chain th.at holds his huge legs binds the monster in protective chains ! [Laughter.] Business for Women.?There is no more doubt about the ability of women to do good work, and continuous work, than there is of that of men. The continuity of perseverance is altogether in favor of women, where it has been trained by exercise; the power of concentration upon a given point, or for a given length of time, is in favor of men. But the conditions of work are inexorable for both, and they can not be wished or sentimentalized, or scolded, or even voted away. Tliere are certain kinds of work that are less fitted for women than others ; and, as a rule, women very properly avoid them ; there are other kinds, however, for which women are extremely well fitted, some of which men at present perform, and these women who are wise will fit themselves for and try to secure. There is no reason why women should be chambermaids and employes, and men managers and also proprietors. In France men do most of the chamber work in hotels and public places, and women are the managers and superintendents, the sellers and Cashiers. The whole business of retail buying and selling might be in the hands of women, with very great advantage to the buyer and the seller. It is a most absurd thing that the whole retail provisioning of our great cities is in the hands of ignorant men and liquor sellers, while while women are starving in garrets, or making shirts at six cents apiece. These men often do not know the articles that they sell by their names, they do not know their uses ; buy in a blind way what is offered them ; they take "samples" from agents, and test the thing by their ability to sell it. Women know better what is needed ; they could accommodate their goods hotter to the needs of their customer's ; they arc moie willing to take trouble ; they have more faculty for detail. Hut in business or labor of any other kind, that enters into competition with the active world, there are no favors to be asked, no con* - J ~~11* .. Of siuerauon snown. xuu um?t ?eu a ucua mtide than another, you must do your work as well or better than another, and you must always be at your post. Nor must you be so foolish as to consider yourself necessary in your place?a gap made is easily filled?few are able to distinguish the difference ; and so the tide goes on, and rolls over us, unless we can keep abreast of its current. It is not easy; it is not flattering to our self love, but it is the law of competitive life. Boys, Go Home.?Ah, boys ! you who have gone out from the homesteads into the rush and bustle of life, do you ever think of the patient mothers who are stretching out to you arms that are powerless to draw you back to the old home nest V?arms that were strong to carry you once, pressed to hearts that love you now as then. No matter, though your hair is silver-streak UllVyUUOV^lVUO VI U1IV ??r ? lost its stomach, and that the food is quietly dropping out of the gullet at the other end as fast as it is swallowed. So, too, if we decapitate that queer Mediterranean insect, the praying mantis, the headless body will stand catching dies with its outstretched arms, and fumbling about for its mouth when it has caught one, evidently much surprised to find that its head is unaccountably missing. In fact, whatever may may be the case with man, the insect at least is really a conscious automaton. It sees or smells food, and is at once impelled by its nervous constitution to eat it. It receives a sense impression from the bright hue of a flower, and it is irresistibly attracted towards it, as the moth is to the candle. It has no powers of deliberation, no ability even to move its own limbs in unaccustomed manners. Its whole life is governed for it by its fixed nervous constitution, and by the stimulations it receives from outside. And so, though the world probably appears much the same to the beetle as to us, the nature of its life is very different. It acts like a piece of clockwork mechanism, wound up to perform a certain number of fixed movements, and incapable of ever going beyond the narrow circles for which it is designed.?Grant Allen, in Knowledge. Single Women.?A clever old maid once said that it was far better to be laughed at because you were not married, than not to be able to laugh because you were. There is sound logic in that. It is well for a woman to marry if she meets a good, true man, who loves her, and whom she loves ; but if she be not suited, better that sue remain single. j.ne majority of old maids are helpful, loveable and sweet tempered, and till their allotted niche as acceptably as do their married sisters. Are they not more to be honored than they would have been had they merely married for a home or position ? Our young ladies have erroneous ideas upon this subject. They feel almost disgraced if they have arrived at a mature age and are not yet able to write Mrs. before their names. Their whole ambition is to get a husband, by hook or crook ; but get him somehow they must. Consequently, they take the first man that offers himself, whether he really suits them or not. Now, girls, do not marry in haste. Get the best education possible, help about domestic affairs, and enter upon some trade or profession for which you have a taste, and master it. Skilled labor is always well paid. Don't spend your time in repining because you cannot see the coming man. If you never see him you can live useful, happy lives. You think if you had a husband you would have a strong arm on which to lean, a sharer of sorrow and trouble. Alas ! many a slender woman has not only had to stand alone, but serve also as a prop for children and husband ; and very few wives find in their husbands all the sympathy and companionship they desire. If you are good for anything you will not be hurt by remaining single, neither will you be elevated by becoming John's wife. Do your duty in life, and you will count for one in the world whether you are married or single. The Newspaper Man.?The reason why so few men, comparatively, succeed in jour 1 ? 1? ' ?*? ^A?? i f llin fmn_ nailSIU IS uecaust; su lew ua?c iui it mo I>erament and the constitution. More than a xuoiety of mankind is slow, lacking in alacrity, and devoid of a sense of proportion. The art of putting things rapidly into shape is not well understood by the public. This is the reason why we have long-winded sermons, lectures promotive of somnolency, and magazine work which presupposes that longevity vouchsafed to the long-abiding old gentlemen and ladies of the Old Testament. The public is not inconsiderate?it is only ignorant. The newspaper is a mystery of the manufacture of which it knows hardly anything. Those who give to it the enthusiasm of youth, the vigor of manhood and whatever of wisdom and experience old age may have brought with it, might have had an abiding fame in this department of literature or the other in the field of science, or the arena of public affairs. Taste or accident has betrayed them into a humble sphere of human exertion, nor do they quarrel with their fortune. lie who drifts into journalism rarely leaves it ; he still plods on the daily toil which for him has a rare fascination. Often there is no fame for liiin. The cleverest newspai>er man may be utterly unknown, and not forgotten only because he has never been remembered. His heart, however, is stout, at any rate ; and come competence, or the lack of it?come the highest or the humblest position?he still toils with irrepressible cheerfulness, and hopes, when all is over with him, that his associates who survive him will be reasonably sorry or solemn at his funeral. A Dun.?That debt is a small one, to be sure, and apparently not worth a serious thought. "Why not pay it then ? Why be compelled to suffer the mortification of a dun ? ' ? * - -i- Uiil.. ihA.M ^,,4- imnt* >V Iiy ilOC LHK6 mat ULwe wiwu uui ui juuj. finger at once V It will fester if allowed to remain, and cause ten times the trouble. Why not relieve the conscience of that little load V You will feel better by doing it. You contracted the debt knowingly and willingly. Did you not mean to pay it V Certainly you did. Then why don't you do it at once ? Every day's delay increases, morally, the amount of the obligation. Remember, too, that your little debt, and another man's little debt, and a thousand other mens' little debts, make a little fortune for your creditor ; or they enable him to pay his larger debt, or feed bis workmen and keep his machinery going in times like these. Don't you see how it is ? You do ? Well then, pay the amount at once, and to-night the ghost of that debt will not trouble your dreams. SHORTENED LIFE IN THE HUMAN RALE. The maturity of man, calculated by the completed condition of the skeleton, is twenty-one years. Twenty-one years multiplied by five? 105? years?is, therefore, the natural duration of the life of man on this estimate, and with a certain natural limited range, may be accepted as the true and full duration. But when the actual value of life is taken it is found to present, in this country, an average of forty-two years, so that there are grand agencies at work which are reducing the natural life to a very low value. If the enquirer enter further into the matter, he will observe that the grand agencies leading to this reduced value of life must be in some way removeable, because they are not always in action to reduce every form of life to the same level of duration. He will discover that the domestic animals which surround us, if we do not kill them outright by hard labor, privation or exposure to the vicissitudes of seasons, are so much longer lived than we are, that they exist practically, to their full term with as much exactitude as we exist to the first or second stage of AM f~\mm 4-/\ %?? 4* 4k/\ mnf f 11) OMAflmi* cAldlCllUC* V/I, tu puu liio luabbgi in uuuvnui. light, he will discover that if our lower domestic animals were to die, their duration of life, as it is now known, would be redyced to nearly half what it is. The dog would have an average term of eight years, and other animals a reduced term of life. Such observations as these will lead the sanitarian tofind uniform object in his labor. He will ask what is the reason why man, who holds all the knowledge and skill above the brute creation, should have so little control over his destiny that he cannot control it in respect to health and life as well as the inferior creature, which compared with himself, has neither reason nor skill. lie will wonder in vain so long as he looks simply at the general fact. He will not wonder at all when he proceeds to an analysis of all the details upon which that general fact depends. In the first place we will learn from an analysis of the data he may collect, that man is subject to many more diseases than inferior animals are; that he suffers from certain diseases of the mind incidental to his possession of a mental organization superior altogether to theirs, and from which diseases they are exempt ; that he suffers from some diseases connected with industrial pursuits from which they are exempt; that he suffers from indulgences of certain luxuries of a deadly kind from which they are exempt; that he suffers from various accidents from which they are exempt; that he suffers from hereditary taints of disease from which they are exempt.?yOur Homes. IIow tiie Thistle Became an Emulem.? It was at the time of an invasion when the destinies of Scotland hung upon the result of A tnuue soon lo come. JLiie liivaueia were upon the soil, and if they gained the victory in the first encounter they might not afterward be overcome. It matters not whether the invaders were Danes or Norwegians, or Normans, the simple origin of the emblem is the same. The invaders knew that the Scots were desperate, and if they would surely conquer them they must fall upon them suddenly and unawares. To this end they availed themselves of a dark, stormy night, and planned to fall upon the Scottish army on every side at the same moment. Had they been suffered to execute their plan undetected, they would certainly have succeeded in entirely destroying the Scots, but a simple accident betrayed them. When near the Scottish camp the foremost of the invaders removed the heavy shoes from their feet so that their steps might not be heard, and thus stealthily advancing, bare-footed, a heavy, quick-tempered soldier trod squarely upon a huge thistle, the sharp point of which gave such sudden and exquisite pain that he cried out with a bitter curse in agony. His cry aroused the outlying Scots, and apprised them of their danger. With wonderful alacrity they sprang to their arms, and meeting the foe widely divided for the purpose of encompassing the camp, they were enabled easily to overcome them, which they did with great slaughter. The unfortunate soldier v ho had so unwittingly given the alarm was captured alive ; and when he had told his story, and the Scots knew to what their deliverance was due, they resolved to adopt the thistle as the national insignia of their country. ? A Little Boy's Coolxess.?The suit of William O'Connor against the Boston & Lowell Railroad at Lawrence has resulted in a verdict for the plaintiff in $10,000, one-half the amount sued for. This suit grew out of an accident which occurred August 26, 1880. The plaintiff was the father of a child between 5 and 6 years old. He and his brother, three years older, were crossing a private way maintained by the railroad for the Essex Company, and the younger boy, while walking backward, stepped between the rail and the planking of the roadway inside and was unable to extricate his foot. At that moment the whistle of a train was heard within a few hundred feet and out of sight around a curve, and it appeared from the evidence that the older brother, finding himself unable to relieve his brother, ran down the track toward the train ; but finding he could not attract the attention of the trainmen to his brother's condition, and that he must be run over, ran back to biro, and telling him to lie down, pulled him outward and down and held him there until the train had passed. Both feet of the little fellow were cut off or mangled so that amputation was necessary. The theory of the defense was that the boy was not caught, but while running across the track, fell and was run over. But the testimony of the older' brother was unshaken in every particular. It would be difficult to match the nerve, thoughtfulness, and disregard of self displayed by this boy, who at that time was less than 9 yearn old.?Boston Herald. ? Oriental Indifference to Life.?It needs a very long time and much bitter experience to teach a European how lightly an Oriental stakes his life, how quietly he pays forfeit when he loses. Be it a savage for or a remorseless climate against which he plays, the low caste Hindoo will wager death and torment for a few copper coins. I had a bheestie in that war, who was invalid from frostbite, and probably lost both his feet, while all the time he was carrying in his knapsack the good English boots and long warm stockings I had given him. These he meant to sell, putting them on only when sure to see me: but he waited to secure a higher price. And he tramped barefoot, he slept in cotton clothes, when the thermometer fell below zero, until he sacrificed his limbs, perhaps his life. Playing the same stakes against a human enemy, the Hindoo is still more recniess. It is one of the most striking illustrations of the power of machinery that cotton can be brought from the far interior of India, on the backs of bullocks, to the sea, shipped around the Cape of Good Hope to England, manufactured, shipjied back by the same route, paying repeated commissions and profits, and undersell the native manufacturer 011 the spot where the raw product is grown, and where labor is considered well paid at fifteen cents a day.? Senator Bayard. ^/V^A ovn * ? nirnv 4" It AVAnrrli 1 Tf liQmw tgf) OUUIC lliCII mo IIOTC1 I/Iiwiuugiii; imin>j until they have made themselves supremely miserable. If no real cause for such misery exists, they will manage to invent one. They are morbidly sensitive, always on the look out for a slight, ready to construe any little occurrence into an intentional affront. The more you try to assure them of your good disposition toward them, the more they disturb you. The best policy is to let them alone, to give no heed to their whimsicalness. fgr The promise, "My grace is sufficient for thee," is a consoling one to every Christian, and at the same time the communicable, or Christian graces, "love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, meekness and temperance are food to his soul. The Christian graces have been compared to trees?the more they are shaken by storms the deeper root they take, and the more fruit they bear." J