University of South Carolina Libraries
Humorous ?fp?ttownt. COMING TO WOOT^ Susan, you'll make a smart, capable woman, if you git the right kind of a husband," said Uncle Jotham Kingsley, chucking me under the chin. "I know where there is a splendid chance for you?a tplendid chance!" "Where ?" I asked, amused at Uncle Jotham's seriousness. "Ah ! up to Brasherville," answered Uncle Jotham, knowingly. "Just say you'll consider the matter soberly, an' I'll send him down." "Of course I'll consider the matter soberly," I answered, not having the faintest idea that Uncle Jotham would take me at my word. But he did; for, about a week after his departure, I received the following letter, which from its appearance generally, had most likely cost him a whole day's work : "My Dear Niece Susan.?I take my pen in vtorta ?A infnrm mil flint, i am waII An' hnan these fa lines will I&nd you epjoyin' the Same great blessin. On Account of your great resemBlance to my dear deceast wife, who you was named after I feel a grait Interest in your welfair, an' would like to see you settled down and Doin wel, and i think a good husband would be the best thing for you. "As You promised to consider the matter Soberly if i would send Down a likly, respecktable man, i am goin to do so. His naim is Calub Finch. Hes a widderer, an has 5 childurn. they are Smart, an You wouldn't have Any trouble with em. Hes got 80 akers of The best land in the whull of Brasherville, an 8 kows an severill horses. Hes goin to start a dary ef he gits married. nowTie don't have anybody to see to Things an his houskeepin is goin to rack An ruin. "ive told him all about You an I think yooll suit him, Only youre a most too young. Howsumever that cant Be helpt. He will come down the first of next week an there won't be nothin to Hender your makin a good bargin, if vouve only a mind to. he was very kind to the late Missus Finch, an' spared no ecspents when she was s:ck. her doctor-bill amounted to Over 25 dollars. He got her the handsomest gravestone thats ever been set up in the symetry. "Hopin that you'll conclude to act for your interest I, scribe my Self. Your atfeckshunate unkle, - "Jotham Kingslee." "To Mis Susan Spencer." Dear me! J never laughed in all my life before as I did over that letter, with its awful spelling, and its capitals scattered in promiscuously, for all the world, Bell declared, as if he had shaken them out of the sand-box, and they had stuck wherever they happened to fall. But the most laughable part of it was the idea that he had actually got a husband looked up for me, and was going to send him down to see me. "You're a lucky young lady," said Bell, with tears in her eyes, the moment she stopped laughing enough to utter a coherent word. "Only think how kind he was to the late deceased 'Missus Finch'! If you should die, you'll have the consoling thought to cheer your last hours that he'll get you a'handsome gravestone,' and that he will pay your doctor's bill cheerfully, even if it does amount to 'over twenty-five dollars.' You'll be attended to 'regardless of expense,' I haven't the least doubt." "And the five children !" I said, gasping with laughter. "But they're smart, and that's one consolation." "What a pity, that you're quite so young!" said Bell, making an effort to recover her dignity, and failing signally in the attempt. "It's too bad that you can't have your age changed by an act of the Legislature to accommodate your expected Mr. Finch! That sounds splendidly, doesn't it ? It'll look nice too, when he has you deposited by the late 'Missus Finch' in the 'symetry.' Dear, dear! who ever heard of anything quite so comical before ?" "But what's to be done ?" I asked, as the real state of the case' began to make itself apparent. "Here we are, left to keep house while mother is visiting. Next week Mr. Finch is coming?" "Coming to woo 1" sang Bell. "Mr. Finch coming to woo!" . "And I want to know what we are going to do with him ?" I demanded. "You're going to marry him, of course," answered Bell. "I advise you to fall to and 'begin to-consider the matter,' as Uncle Jothara requested. Think it over prayerfully and well, and let the argument of the late 'Missus Finch's gravestone' weigh in Mr. Finch's favor." "It's all well enough for you to laugh," said I, indignantly ; "but if you were in my place you'd think differently of it. How am I going to get rid of the wretch ? What under the sun possessed Uncle Jolham to send mm off down here ? I never was so provoked in all my life, never !" "I'll tell you what I'll do," said Bell, after a silence of a minute or two. "He doesn't know how you look, and if I were so pass myself off for you, he'd never know the mistake. I'll be Susan, if you'll be Bell, and I'll get rid of Mr. Finch for you." "If you only would," cried I. "I will," answered Bell, her eyes sparkling with?anticipated pleasure ; "I'm going to make Mr. Finch think I am deaf?deaf as a post. Oh! my, won't it be jolly, though ?" Bell leaned back in her chair, and laughed till her sides ached. Monday morning Mr. Finch came. We took a good look at him from the window as he came up the path. He was a little man, with red hair, and no eyes to speak of. The poor gentleman had evidently got on his best Sunday clothes, and looked ill-at-ease in consequence. Perhaps his mission helped to make him nervous. "From this time forth, as long as he stays, I'm deaf, remember," said Bell, warningly. - - * * * .1 1 l ^ "I shan't be able to near anyining snort ui ? respectable scream." I went to the door. "Is this Miss Susan Spencer ?" asked Mr. Finch, as he'entered. "Susan is in the sitting-room," I answered. "I'll introduce you. You are Mr. Finch, aren't you ?" "Yes'm; Caleb Finch," he responded, so solemnly that I wanted to giggle. I took him into the sitting-room where Bell was. "Susan," said I, in a loud voice, "this is Mr. Finch." "I don't hear what you say," said Susan, turning her ear toward me. "Speak a little louder, if you please." "This is Mr. Finch!" I screamed in her ear. I thought I must laugh to se>"s how horrified Mr. Finch looked. "I am glad to see you, Mr. Finch, said "Susan," with a beaming smile. "Take a chair?bring it close, if you please, because I am slightly affected with deafness. How are the children ?" "Pretty well," answered Mr. Finch, taking a seat beside her. "Louder, if you please," said "Susan," presenting her ear. "Pretty well," answered Mr. Finch, in a fair war-whoop. I managed to keep my face turned the other way, and had hard work to keep from screaming. "I was much touched at what Uncle Jotham wrote about your kindness to your late wife," said "Susan," with a fond glance in Mr. Finch's face. "What did she die of?" "Congestion of the brain," answered Mr. Finch, his voice about two octaves higher than its usual pitch. "I, didn't hear," said "Susan." "A trifle louder, Mr. Finch." Mr. Finch repeated his reply in so loud a tone that he got red in the face with the exertion its utterance caused him. "Ah !" "Susan" comprehended at last "Is she always so ?" he asked, turning to me, and wiping his face vigorously with a big red-and-yellow handkerchief. "She isn't quite as deaf all the time," I answered, demurely. Pretty soon Mr. Finch made another attempt at conversation. "You have a pretty place here," he shouted. "Yes; groceries are pretty dear," responded "Susan." "You're are right about that, Mr. Finch." "Pretty place," exclaimed Mr. Finch, getiingfdesperate. "Pretty place here!" and he waved bis hand toward the garden and grounds. "Yes, I know," answered "Susan," mournfully ; "but it couldn't.be helped, I suppose." Mr. Finch cast a despairing glance at me. I had to leave the room. I could stand it no longer. When I was safely outside the door I laughed till I could laugh no more. I could only chuckle in a kind of faint imitation of a laugh. I hadn't strength enough left for the genuine article. As I sat there I heard Mr. Finch shouting in his highest tones to "Susan," who always had to have everything repeated to her. It wasn't long before he began to get hoarse, for she kept him busy. A dozen times, while we were eating dinner, I thought I must laugh ; it was so comical to see "Susan," not a muscle of her face relaxing from its dignified look, holding out her ear for Mr. Finch to repeat his remarks in it. He couldn't have eaten his dinner, if he had had the best of appetites. All the afternoon "Susan" kept him sitting by her. I could see the poor man, half-tired out, cast furtive glances at the clock. At last he got up, and beckoned me into the hall. "T t.binlr T'll he fttrnin' back." he said, with a sigh that indicated how great his disappointment was. "I come down, on your uncle's recommend, to make some kind of a bargain with your sister Susanhe never told me a word about her bein' so deaf" "It's an unfortunate affliction," I said, feeling that he expected me to say something." "Yes, very," answered Mr. Finch, with another sigh. "I hain't said anything to her about my intention, 'cause 'twouldn't he prudent for me to marry any one as deaf as she is. Beats all I ever see or heerd of!" "I am sorry," I said, working hard to keep my gravity. "So am I," said Mr. Finch. "She seems willin' enough. She's got a real kind disper sition ; talked feelingly about the late Miss' Finch, an' appreciated my efforts toward doin' justice to her memory. But I don't feel's ef 1'^ orter say anythin' to her about what my intentions were. I don't s'poee you'd be willin' to come up an' keep house for me?" Mr. Finch gave me a very insinuating glance, and looked hopeful. "Oh! I couldn't think of such a thing," said I. "I'm too young, and, then, there's other reasons, you see." "Yes, I s'pose so." Mr. Finch heaved a disappointed sigh. "I don't s'pose there's any use or goin' in to tell her good-by; you can tell her that for me. I may as well be goin'," he added, taking his hat "Good-day." "Good-day," I answered, and Mr. Finch took his departure. A lUQot oftor mv qiHm wprn lniriA and XJh. I* VVA C*A irvi VUMV AUJ W<vtvw> ll v*v ? sore from the effect which Mr. Finch's visit had on them. I got a letter from uncle Jotham after Mr. Finch's return to Brasherville. "I never heerd nothin' about you bein' deaf," he wrote. "Seems to me it come on sudden. It's a pity, because Mr. Finch is a nice man." Bell and I often laugh about the poor man. I hope the efforts he made to make her hear didn't injure his lungs. I've been afraid he'd go into quick consumption. A KINDRED TIE. She was a lame woman. She limped and she carried a cane, and it was natural to iufer that she was lame. She entered the Norris- 1 town depot to wait for a train, and was closely ' followed by a lame man. He had a stiff knee, and he also carried a cane. Two lame per- ' sons are no great sight in this big city. Lame ! men and women limp their lame way up and 1 down every day, and few people ever remark 1 them. The lame woman took a seat, and after a little "wLilo-dlO WftP joinwl Ky +_Vio lamp mon He wore a bright smile, and, as he dropped down, he cheerfully remarked: I "Quite a coincidence." : She made no reply. She was ugly-looking, J 1---i ?1 on/1 mo/io im llor (JUL SIIU lUUIkCU lilLLL UYOij cuju iuauv u^/ mw? mind that she would go and hang herself if ' she looked as homely as he did. "I am lame and you are lame," continued the man. "Who are you talking to, sir ?" she demanded, giving him a contemptuous look. "Madam, there must be a kindred tie between us," he softly replied. "I am lame in the left leg?you are lame in the left leg." "Are you addressing me ?" she exclaimed, flushing very red. "I am, madam; I say there must be a kindred tie between us." "There's no such a thing, sir, and I don't want you to speak to me again," she said. "I am lame and you are lame," he went on. "Rheumatism got into my knee joint, and spoiled one of the best legs in the State. Was it rheumatism in the case of your leg, madam?" "You drunken loafer, you! How dare you talk to me?"she gasped. "I can furnish the best kind of references as to my character," he replied, "and I suppose you can. But doesn't it strike you as a curious coincidence that we are both lame ih the legs, both in the city at once, both waiting to go home, both so ugly looking that we can't get married ?" "You?you !" she choked. 1 "1 am fifty years old, and I dye my nair, he coolly continued, "and you are about the same age, and I observe that you dye yer ' hair; I wouldn't go a rod to see a circus pro- 1 cession, and I judge you wouldn't. I love onions, and I should say you did. I love?" "I will have you arrested!" she yelled. "I'll have you jailed in two minutes !" "As I was going to remark, madam, I love?" "G'way, g'way!" she shrieked, clutchiDg her cane. "Nevertheless I am convinced that there is a kindred tie, madam. Two persons lame in their left legs must?" She whacked him vigorously with the cane, and rushed off to another seat, while a gentleman came over to the lame man and told him he would get into trouble if he didn't look out. "I'm through," quietly replied the lame man. "I thought there was a kindred tie, but there isn't. I'll never kindred tie any living female who is so stuck up that she won't listen to philosophy. She can take her old lame leg and go home." And he sat down and read an almanac for 1876. Artless Girl.?Sweet, gushing, artless girl. She had just come home. She went away a year ago last September; went to England first; spent the winter in Italy; sauntered through Germany in the spring; i?i- i.- * : j Ciime UilCK. IU aujchui auu uiiicu anaj nit summer at Saratoga, LoDg Branch and the White Mountains. Previous to this trip she had been away to school five years, and when she jumped out of the car into her father's' arms, she said, impulsively, "0! paw-paw, deah paw, they's no place like home!" And "paw's" face was a study, as he replied, "Well, no; reckon not; must be quite a novelty to ye." _ More Bribery.?The other day, when a Detroit woman was splitting wood, she hit her knee with the axe-handle, and mashed a bone. Her husband agreed to give her five dollars to tell the doctor that she fell down stairs, but the surgeon was a wise man. He said that the knee had been injured by a kick, and the husband had to say that the axe-handle did it, and add: "We had lots of split wood on hand, but she was using the axe as a guard against consumption." Poor Peters.?Said his honor, "Mr. Peters, why don't you sit down, sir?" "I don't sit down any more, sir." "But you must." , "I can't, sir." "Why can't you?" Well, sir, she said we couldn't both sit in one chair, and I tried to demonstrate that we could, and she picked me up and settled me on top of a red-hot stove, and?I don't believe I care to sit down, if it pleases the court." The court agreed with the witness. Agricultural fcpartmcut. [Original.] UNITED EFFORT. The condition of our country is in many respects very peculiar. The farmers?at least a majority of the large farmers?are in embarrassed circumstances, and many of the small farmers are not in a very prosperous condition. Several reasons may be assigned for the present condition of the South. Since the war there has been a much smaller supply of food, both for man and beast, produced in the South, than was ever before. AH the pork and bacon have been bought, and nearly all the corn, flour, hay and fodder. This is one reason why farmers are so hard pressed. Another is, they have been extravagant in their dress and in their mode of living, generally. They have simply lived beyond their income. They made one dollar, and spent more than a dollar. These two reasons form the base of the present critical condition of our country. To these may be added exorbitant taxes, inefficient labor, and a host of other things springing out of the deplorable political condition of the whole country. Every man who desires to see the country restored to prosperity, must retrace his steps. First of all things, he must make an honest effort to produce his UTTU OU|/pilTOt A decided improvement, in this particular, has taken place within the last two years. More small grain was sown last fall, than has been sown in any one season in the last ten. It is to be hoped that more corn will be planted all over the Southern country this spring, than ever was before. If this is done, provisions will be plenty. If, in addition to this, an effort is made, some hogs can be raised?at j least half enough to supply the demand of the country. As a people, we have been extravagant. We must be more economical in the future. We must dispense with a multitude of useless j extravagances in dress, and luxuries in living. We must submit to some sacrifices if we , would save the country from bankruptcy. , Half the usual cotton crop, could it kll be applied to the paying of debts, would place the majority of our farmers in a safe condition. 1 Heretofore it has taken all the cotton crop to ' meet current expenses, and still there remained a fearful deficit. In this thing there must be united effort. 1 One man by himself can do very little. Man ' is a social being and society is ruled by the 1 majority. If the majority of farmers would j inaugurate such a reform as we have indica- , ted, the minority would not long be found lag ing behind. With proper forethought and rigid economy, there is no reason why next ' year may not be as prosperous as the present ' is gloomy. At present there is no encouragement to plant a large crop of ootton. The price is by no means very remunerative when we count the cost of producing it; and the probability is that the ruling price in the future will be below what it is at present. Supply and demand in the future must regulate the price of cotton. The present supply is more than equal to the demand. It is worth an effort to rescue a country like core from its embarrassed condition. The thing can be done if a properly directed effort is made. The effort must be made at once and made by all. m From the Southern Home. FRUIT I'REES. Mr. Editor : several years ago, while on a pastoral visit at the house of Alexander Gibion in Lemley'8 Township, I was asked to go nto the garden to see a "wonderful thing." The previous winter n part of the orchard lad been cut off by a fance, and enclosed in i pasture, in which were put sheep and geese ind calves. The wonderful thing was, that n the pasture the fruit was fine and very sound; while over the fence in the field it was ?ery faulty, very wormy. These facts recalled some reading in my boyhood. An editor had seen a row of plum trees on a millrace. The branches overhang- f ing the water had sound fruit; the others j ?ery wormy. Philosophizing upon the facts, be said that instinct taught whatever it was that pierced the young fruit not to deposit its 3gg where its young would perish, when the c fruit would fall into the water. r Many persons have noticed how sound ? peaches are about old house sites, turned out v and much frequented by all kinds of ranging itock. In such places it would be hard to find a wormy peach, or the borers in their roots. An Ohio lady lately wrote that she had a iozen plum trees .in her yard, utterly worthless, because the fruit was always wormy and 3hed before ripening. One year she placed her coops under one tree and fed her poultry there. That season that tree, and that alone, had sound fruit. These facts seem to support that editor's instinct theory. The matter is worth more observation and experiment than has hitherto been bestowed. Do the insects propagate only, or even principally, through fruit? If so, would it be possible to exterminate them through pasturage at the proper time? When would be that time ? Will fruit-growers please take notice, and communicate all facts bearing on these questions, that they may be able to collect ? Respectfully, A. Ranson. Huntersville, N. C. Road Dust and Poultry Dung.?Road J"-* ? rr\ no tfra zona f a a on a koni*k. UUOb AS WIUI/U Uiauj uuuoo Ibo c*o nu uvoui w ent. Those who keep poultry may secure, by I its use, a valuable fertilizer, nearly as strong " as guano, with none of its disagreeable odor. Place an inch or two of road dust in the bottom of a barrel; then, as the poultry house iB ! regularly cleaned, deposit a layer an inch ' thick of the cleanings, and so on alternately, layers of each till the barrel is full. The i I thinner each layer is, the more perfect will be ; ] the intermixture of the ingredients. If the 1, soil of which the road dust is made is clayey, j ( the layers may be of equal thickness; if sandy, j the dust should be at least twice as thick as !' the layer of droppings. Old barrels may be 1 used for this purpose; and if previously soaked < with crude petroleum or coated with gas tar, j they will last many years. If the contents are pounded on a floor into fine powder before applying, the fertilizer may be sown from a drill. Road dust is one of the most perfect deodorizers of vaults?converting their con* 1- _1 ? A- ? ? *?* ? * ? ? " Aft ft kftv teDlS ai8U 1UIU tt IltU luauuic. X iaw a uua ( or barrel of it in the closet, with a small dip- j per, and throw down a pint into the vault! each time it is occupied, and there will be no j offensive odor whatever. This is simpler, i cheaper and better than a water-closet, and never freezes or gets out of order. Mixing the road dust with an equal bulk of coal ashes is an improvement, making the fertilizer more friable.? Country Gentleman. A Good Whitewash.?For a good, durable whitewash that will stand exposure to the weather, take half a bushel of freshly burned lime, slake it with warm water; cover it during the process to keep in the steam. Strain i the liquid through a fine sieve, and add to it seven pounds of salt, previously well dissolved in warm water; three pounds of ground rice boiled to a thin paste and stirred in boiling hot; half pound of powdered Spanish whiting; one pound of clean glue, which has j i been previously dissolved by soaking it well, j ,and then hanging it over a slow fire in a small kettle, within a large one, filled with {< water. Add five gallons of hot water to the I mixture, stir it well and let it staud a few !' days covered. It must be put on quite hot. j For this purpose it can be kept in a kettle on a portable furnace. About a pint of this j' mixture will cover a square yard. I j fUaflituj for gabbxth CONDUCTED BY , , . REV. ROBERT LATHAN. I Original ] THE UNJUST STEWARD.? Lukexri: 1-8. In the parables of the New Testament, our Saviour speaks as never man spoke. In the wide range of literary compositions, there is nothing to be compared to these parables. They are intensely interesting and very instructive. In the parable of the unjust steward, the chief object of the Saviour is to show that men of the world manifest more wisdom in the management of their business, than Christians do in the management of their spiritual affairs. This is brought prominently to view in a way that no one but a divine being could have done it. A certain rich man is informed that his prime minister, or the individual who was honored with the general supervision and management of bis business, bad wasted bis goods. The Steward had in some way taken advantage of his position, and done, or suffered to be done, something that had tended to waste the property of his employer. Such cases were common in the time of our Saviour, and they are common yet, and will always be common. The rich man determined to call the Steward to an account and dismiss him from his high and honorable position. This fact was communicated to the Steward. Conscious of guilt, and feeling satis6ed that his expulsion from office was certain to take place, he began, like a shrewd calculator, to reflect upon the condition of things and his prospects for the future. He thus reasoned with himself: "I cannot work. I have led a life of ease and comfort. However willing I may be to earn a living by honest toil, such has been my education that I am physically unable to work. I cannot dig. I have acted as an overseer amongst my employer's tenants, and they i a , , , bave been accustomed ior years to treat me with great respect. By these tenants I have been regarded as second only to the rich man by whom, I am now, on account of ray folly, thrust out of office. I cannot wander about among these people and solicit a living. I cannot beg; I am ashamed to do this." Having thought over the whole condition af his present affairs and his prospect for the Future, he resolved npon a plan which would secure him the means of sustenance in the future. He called op his employer's tenants and began to reduce their bills. This would at once secure him the good will of those who were indebted to the rich man. They would feel that, by this act, they were placed under lasting obligation to the Steward. The rich man of course was swindled by this act; but :be debtors of the rich man were benefited and :he prospects of the unjust Steward were made nore bright for the future. The rich man commended the course of the Steward. He was not pleased that he was cheated and swindled out of what was honesty due him ; but he could not but admire the ihrewdness of the Steward in making provison for himself when he would be thrust out >f office. The act of the Steward was dishon sst; but it was a cunningly devised scheme, >oldIy executed. Although cheated, the rich nan could not but admire the forethought md energy of the unjust Steward. He had nade provision for himself, so that in future, ilthough no longer The froB man's prime minster, he would be. able to occupy a position in ociety above both a beggar and a manual la- ' >orer. It was this that the rich man com- j ended, and by this shrewd and cunning ( :ouree of the unjust Steward, the Saviour aught the multitude that "the children of his world are, in their generation, wiser than < he children of light" Both, the children of this world and the children of light, are making provision for the * ? - ?Ull/lBAn + V?ia nrnrl^ fnr O fpm mure f tuo uuuuicu ui omo ??wi<u ? )oral future, but the children of light for an iternal future. The children of this world I ire striving for a crown that fadeth ; but the children of light are striving for a crown of 1 ighteousness?an eternal unfading crown. , still, our Saviour says the children of this rorld are wiser in their generation than the ihildren of light. Iu other words, the men >f the world manage their business in a more susiness-like manner, than the church does he affairs which pertain to Christ's kingdom. The children of the world are ready to nake sacrifices. In order to amass wealth or ,o make themselves famous in the eyes of heir fellows, the men of the world will subect themselves to tropical suns and boreal winds. All the comforts of home and the aslociation of friends are despised, that the obect of their desires may be obtained. Hunger and thirst, cold and nakedness, are borne without a murmur by the men of the world, sacrifices are made, willingly, that they may )btain a crown that perishes. They spend what they have that they may gain more, rhe men of the world exhibit their shrewdness in that they strive with energy. They jat not the bread of idleness. They ri9e up >oon and retire late to bed. All the energies >f their bodies and minds are taxed. Night md day they move. They make and save, they plan and work, scheme and execute. Brain and muscle are incessantly busy. The children of the world are liberal. To effect their purposes, often requires millions; but contributions are made and gladly made. They cast their bread upon the waters that they may gather it with an increase of an hundred fold after many days. They build ships and employ seamen, that they may push their commerce to the distant ends of the globe. They are liberal in the prime of life, that they may be able to say to their souls in >M ape. "Soul, thou hast much goods laid up ? D'f ? 9 W in store." The wisdom of the children of this world is most manifest in their earnestness. Whatever may be the object of their pursuit, they pursue it with intense earnestness. They think about it and talk about it, more than they think and talk about all other things together. All other subjects are of minor importance. Their earnestness makes them ready to undergo deprivation and keep their appetites in subjection. All the Church needs to cause her to grow and flourish, is that the members of the church be as wise in the management of her affairs, as the children of the world are in the management of their various avocations of life. The King and head of the church would then bless his people, and peace and prosperity would be their common inheritance. It is a shame that those who are contending for a crown of righteousness should be less wise than those who are contending for a crown that perishes. Tacitly, we are informed by the Saviour in the parable of the rich man and the unjust Steward, that every one is a steward. God, in his providence, has given us charge of something. He has made it our business to watch over some part of his vast dominions. We may waste his goods, but we will do it at our own peril. God may bear with us long, but 6nally the hour will come when he will say to us, "Thou mayest be no longer Steward." \ Then we will find that no opportunity will be I given us either to dig or beg. I YORKVLLLE ENQUIRER. VOLUME 38.-1876. THE YORKVILLE ENQUIRER, which, on the lstof January, 1876, will enter upon the Twenty-second volume, is a large, twenty-eight oolumn Daner. handsomely Drinted on clear, legible type, and devoted to the Political, Social, AGricultural and commercial interests of the South. In announcing the new volume, we are enabled to promise increased attractions in all the different departments of the paper, conspicuous among them being the Serial Stories, written expressly for the Enquirer. As a non-partisan, independent family newspaper, the future editorial conduct of the Enquirer can be as well judged by the past as by any promise which we might now feel disposed to make. An experience of thirty-flve years in the newspaper business?of which time at least one-half has been unremittingly devoted to the management of the Enquirer?fully convinces the proprietor that the plan be adopted on assuming control of the paper, is the correct mode of journalism in the present day. The true mission of the newspaper is to place before the public facts as they may exist, unbiased by partisan feelings or sinister motives; and the propriety of this course is fully attested, not only by the success of the Enquirer, which can truthfully claim the largest circulation of any country newspaper in the 8outh, but also by many other of the most popular and widely circulated papers of the day. The course thus indicated we shall continue to pursue, aiming to publish a LITERARY AND FAMILY NEWSPAPER, which shall be a welcome visitor to the Home Circle, and acceptable alike to all classes of readers. Hence, the news department of the Enquirer, whether of matters at home or abroad?political or otherw ise?will be conducted with the utmost care, and only facta as they seem to exist, will be presented, free from sectional or party bias. LITERART DEPARTMENT. The original Serial Stories for the new volume will Dossess unusual interest?beine from the pens of the most popular serial writers. With the first number will be commenced a highly excitingand thrilling story of California and frontier life, by Mrs. Henry Deas, entitled PICCIOLA, Which, as a vivid portrayal of life on the Pacific coast, with adventure, crime, temptation and triumph, is oi^e of the most sensational, yet captivating and pleasing stories of Western life yet written. This story will be followed by others throughout the year, of which we can mention the following as now ready: "THE IRON CHEST," a story of domestic life, abounding in mystery and socresy; and a racy, spirited and romantic story entitled "LOST AND FOUND; Or, the White Fawn of the Forest." In addition to these, other stories of uiihsual interest will be published during the volume. HISTORICAL SKETCHES. The Historical Sketches of the Early History of South Carolina will constitute an important feature of the volume. These Sketches are written by Rev. Robert Lath an, and commencing with the earliest settlement of the State in colonial times, gradually trace its rise and pro gress. To toe writing ana compilation 01 tneae Sketches the author has devoted much thought and extensive research. Besides the colonial history, they will contain the stirring scenes and important events, the anecdotes and incidents?legendary and authentic?which have never before been fully published, connected with the Revolutionary history of the State. Much of the material of these Sketches being traditional?many of the events portrayed having never been in print? and written in Mr. Lathan's easy, femiliarstyle, they will be read with peculiar satisfaction, not only in our own State, but by every one having a just appreciation of the history of a noble ancestry in their struggle for liberty and independence. CHESTER CORRESPONDENCE. To meet the demands of our increasing circulation in Chester county, we have engaged the services of Brainerd McLure, Esq., who will contribute a letter of corrrespondence from Chester regularly each week. These letters are devoted entirely to Chester affairs?to the interests of the town and county?and written in the racy and graphic style peculiar to Mr. McLure, they cannot fail to be of interest to our readers in Cheater, as well as elsewhere in the State. lift uiircir ucrAiiimcnror J In addition to the above features, Rev. Mr. Lathan will continue his regular contributions to the "Sabbath Reading," and the "Children's Department," which, under his management for the past six years, have been an important attraction; and with the usual melange of Miscellaneous Reading adapted to all tastes; the Agricultural Department, containing practical and usefhl information for the farmer and house-wife; a column of Humorous Reading every week; "Scraps and Facts," embracing light current topics ;acompend of the News Abroad and at Home; Correspondence ; Commercial and Market Reports; Editorial Articles upon appropriate subjects, intended to promote the prosperity and welfare of our nfionle. we hoDe to make the Enquirer replete as an entertainfngand instructive Family Journal. Terms op Subscrption?Free op Postage.? Single copy oue year, $3.00. In clubs, each subscriber, per year, $2.60. Money may be forwarded at our risk by draft, post-offlce order or registered letter?otherwise we will assume no risk. Write names plainly, giving post-offlce, oounty and State. Address all letters to L. M. GRIST, Publisher, Yorkville, S. C. PREMIUMS FOR CLUBS. By a favorable arrangement with the different manufacturers, we are enabled to make the following liberal and unprecedented offers of Premiums for Clubs. These Premiums have been adopted by us with special reference to securing only articles of value, and which will prove serviceable to those procuring them. The regular retail price is given with each and they are just as good as so much cash to those who receive them. All the articles are pat down in oar schedule at manufacturers' regular retail prices,'and cannot be bought with cash any lower than the prices here given. Premiums Nos. 1,2 and 3 will be delivered through the mails, to persons entitled to receive them, free of cost. The other Premiums will be delivered at the expense for freight charges, of those receiving them. In cases where Premiums can be delivered at our publication office, arrangements may be perfected for reducing the freight charges on small articles to a nominal amount. The charges for freight on theSilver Ware Premiums will be from New York ; on Webster's Dictionaries from Philadelphia; on the Cooking Stovefrfrom Greensboro, N. C.; and on the Sewing Machines from Baltimore, Md. No. 1.?For a club of 4 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give atreble silver-plated BUTTER KNIFE, worth $1.00. No. 2.?For a club of 8 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one copy of the family edition (cloth binding) of SMITH'S ABRIDGED BIBLE DICTIONARY, the publisher's price of which is $3.50 per copy. Or for $4.50 we will give a copy of the Bible Dictionary and send the Enquirer one year. No. 3.?For a club of 10 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give a treble silver-plated CHILD'S GILT CUP, worth $3.00. No. 4.?For a club of 15 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one set?six of each?Hard Rubber, solid oval-handle TABLE KNIVES AND FORKS, the manufacturer's price of which is $5.00. No. 5.?For a club of 15 subscribers, at $2.60 each, we will give one copy of tue latest eaiuon of WEBSTER'S NATIONAL PICTORIAL DICTIONARY, containing 1,040 pages and 600 illustrations. Publisher's price $5.00. No. 6.?For a club of 17 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one dozen treble silver-plated TEA-SPOONS, worth $6.00. 1 No. 7.?For a club of 17 subscribers, at 12.50 each, we will give a treble silver-plated SYRUP CUP, worth $6.00. No. 8.?For a club of 20 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give a treble silver-plated BUTTER DISH, worth $8.00. No. 9.?For a club of 20 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one dozen solid cast steel ovalhandle TABLE KNIVES, valued at $8.00. No. 10.?For a club of 23 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give a treble silver-plated CASTOR AND FIVE BOTTLES, worth $9.00. No. 11.?For a club of 26 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one dozen treble silver-plated TA BLE SPOONS, worth $12.00. No. 12.?For a club of 26 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one dozen treble silver-plated TABLE FORKS, worth $12.00. No. 13.?For a club of 26 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one treble silver-plated CAKE BASKET, worth $12.00. No. 14.?For a olub of 30 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one copy of the latest edition of WEBSTER'S UNABRIDGED PICTORIAL DICTIONARY, oontaining 1,840 pages, with 3,000 illustrations, besides four pages of colored illustrations showing the Arms of the States and Teri-itnrtftn tho Arms of various Nations, the JTlags of various Nations, United States Naval Flags, i etc., the publisher's price of which is $12.00. No. 15.?For a club of 40 subscribers, at $2.50 I each, we will give one dozen extra superfine, full i oval ivory-handle TABLE KNIVES, with sil- I ver-plated blades, valued at $17.00. No. 16.?For a club of 55 subscribers, at 12.50 each, we will give one No. 8 TROPIC COOKING STOVE, including a full set of fixtures and oooking implements. Manufacturers' price $80.00 No. 17.?For a club of 60 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give one three-quart, treble ailverplated COMMUNION SERVICE, consisting ot SIX pieces, worth $40. No. 18.?for a club of 65 subscribers, at $2.50 each, we will give a treble silver-plated TEA SET, consisting of SIX pieces, via.: 1 Coffee Pot, 2 Tea Pots, 1 Creamer, 1 Sugar Bowl and 1 Slop Bowl, the maker's price of which is $50. No. 19.?For a club of 70 subscribers, at $2:50 each, we will give a WEED SEWING MACHINE, Walnut Plain Half-Case, wth two Drawer* and Drop Leaf, manufacturer's price, $75. I THE SObUHfcE PA - CAPITAL r < f ~ * , -?v< Ml li / ONE MILLIO > .it > ;T :: j 11 / A WE again offer to THE SOLUBLE 1 (IGOi which as a COTTON FERTILIZER, stands oqna would also call attention TO THE ACID made by this company, for ? WHICH WE CAN SAFELY'El In every respect. The aim of FURNISH THE BEST ARTIC -' (I A ">i* * As a substantial evid< ADVANCED THE GRADE A i, i r < Call on us for Circulars and pi T. M. DOBSOi^ YORK VII ! . - * ' * * J. M. IVY & WHITE, STEW A FORTJfrl WILSON & CO CHEST! vauuaij ao COTTON F - ' A FAlk E3 THE CELEBRACT WILCOX, GIBBS & OO.'S IS OFFERED ON THE FOLL On Credit to 1st November, 1878, with option of 17 cents for Middling, delivered at Planter's nearet ses on Goano to destination.)) { j { 'J The advantage to the Farmer in baying on these Guano, that 412 pounds Cotton, (Middling) wfil.'ps can make his calculations accordingly. The* qua been thoroughly established by the use of the ma on same terms. ... u Importers and Dealer* For sale by MASON A HOPE, Agents, Yorkvil February 8 GEORGE WOODS & PARLOR ORGANS r%.*? g|?'| j >Js S"2 ?*g 5^^" These remarkable iristruments possess capacities for musical effects and expression never before attained. Adapted for Amateur and Professional, and an ornament in any parlor, Beautiful New Styles now ready. GEO. WOODS & CO., Cambridgeport, Man. WAREROOMS: 608 Washington St, Boston ; 170 State St, Chicago ; 28 Ludgate Hill, London. THE VOX HUMANA. A leading Musical Journal of selected music and valuable reading matter. By mail for $1 per year, or ten cen{g^ji^mh<7 Fach number oopmusic. GEO. WOODS A CO., Publishers, Cambridgeport, Mass. January 20 3 tf RICHMOND ADVERTISEMENTS. TALBOTT & SONS. In eHfW'VOV HfiOHTNF. WOB?S. uju.wjb.vj - .. , RICHMOND, VAm MAFOTACTTJRERS OF STEAM ENGINES, BOILERS, AGRICULTURAL ENGINES, CIRCULAR SAW MILLS, GRI8T, BARK AMD PLASTER MILLS, SHAFTINGS, HANGER8 AND PULLEYS, IMPROVED TURBINE WATER WHEEL8. October 14 , 41 , If, wm. ettenger. h. p. edmond ETTENGER & EDMOND, Richmond, Va.f MANUFACTUBK^. jOP PORTABLE AN0 STATIONARY ENGINES, BOILER8 OF ALL KINDS, CIRCULAR SAW MILLS, GRIST MILLS, KILL GEARING, SHAFTING, PULLEYS, AO. AMERICAN TURBINE WATER WHEEL)?, CAMERON'S SPECIAL STEAM PUMP.' Send for Catalogue. October 14 41 ly vodit m A dr1 .P V A Tin. x vrxxam. iixaunuu THE undersigned respectfully announces that he is still conducting the above business in Yorkville, and is prepared to furnish anything in the MARBLE LINE from a plain slab .to a costly monument, executed in the best style oi the art, with the very best materials, and at as low prices as the same class of work can be furnished anywhere in the United States. Orders from a distance promptly filled, and the same attention given to wort ordered by mail as If the parties were present in person. From this date work will be delivered at any point on the Chester and Lenoir Narrow Gauge Railroad, between Yorkville and Chester, or at any place between Rock Hill and Winnsboro, on the Charlotte, Columbia and Augusta Railroad, free of charge for transportation. Thankful for the patronage heretofore bestowed upon my establishment, my determination is to merit a continuance of the same. F. HAPPERFIELD. SKY LIGHT, AND NO MORE CLIMBING DP-STAIRS ! "I TAKE pleasure to inform all in want of PHO-. JL TOGRAPHIC PICTURES, that I have just taken possession of my NEW GALLERY, built with fine sky and side-lights,near my residence? first house east of the jail, and only a few hundred yards from the Court House corner. An experience of 28 years and every convenience for ?j .?<ii onoWa mo now to do better work UU01I1090) nm ounw?v than ever before. Frames and Photo-Albums, Stereoscopes and Views always on band. I am also prepared to sell you a MASON A HAMLIN ORGAN, or an AMERICAN SEWING MACHINE, for cash or on time. J. R. SCHORB. July 8 27 : > tf ~ THE J AS. LEFFEL Doable Turbine Water Wheel, i Manufactured by POOLE & HUNT, Baltimore, lid. 7flOO NOW IX TT8EI Simple, Strong, Durable, always reliable and aatia* factory, Manufacturers, aleo, of Portable ft Stationary Lng Mac hinary.Gmxtag tor Cotton Milk Hoar! ?WM??ft?*S a ipeoiilty MachHe made GearlngTtBca. ate and or'very beat flnlah. Send tor Circular* October 7 40 6m BLANK BOOK MANUFACTORY I STATIONERY, AND BOOK BINDERY. THANKING the public for liberal pasi patronage, I now invite attention to my complete stock of STAPLE AND PANCT STATIONERY, consisting, in part, of Fiat Papers, Midium, Folio Post, Demy, Letter and Note. Blank Books, o eve ry variety; Envelopes, Slates, .Ink,, A$, Fancy Stationery, Gold Pens and Pencils, PenKnivee, Writing Desks, Ac. Also, BOOK BINDING BONN, in all its various branches. Sheet Music, Periodicals, Law Books, Ac., bound in any style desired. Old Books rebound and repaired. PUNTED BILL AND LBTTBB HEADS A SPECIALTY Orders promptly attended to, at lowest cash prices. . E. R. 8TOKE8, 155 Main Street Columbia, S. C. LCIFIC GUMOiCO, (PAID IN) -Ji <'?'u 11 ,i : .U?r. .')?! /a .'? ?; 1. "'114 :kJ iittf .UlJii'l .' / : >. -.ill .?!!/. >'<r> DOLLARS, m I : ' Vv i!n;K the farming public ' ' PACIFIC GUANO, _ , ' A :') Vl" i Vl * '.A 1 inmerittoany article aold in the eountry. We f i ViH ^ 1 ' . ,nH'-ll > PHOSPHAT'B > >f . < tii / . ii/. m ,,!i tn; i ( ampostlng with Cotton Seed, f / ,/iiw Na li i lillllUri <> ! of Df'Jilf ECOMMEND AS FIRST-CLASS, .. .t n&V. thia company has ever been, to ; fi:- 01 i'yff umi nl LE AT THE LOWEST PRMtE. ance of this, they have "I; r; If- > Jitrlt ND LOWERED THE PRICE. # ^ *0 Myr 4 . , ... i. 11: i ? ,<":m JI1.41H muM rices, before buying elsewhere. <] .... - . 1 - . i " r -& CO., .Agents, i-o? r>i. * , / :r / rvt 1 1 >f. 1 <1: jt lijE, s.c;; - ' ' ' uS^CO., Agents, -HI...j :k ['?!'-/' 7iU*OWJ'lIl iILL,' 5., Q. - j,-t . ? . i. it. RT& CO., Agents, :> !> 1, > ; : a. '1 >v "vv,tv*' i. ILL, S, C. - . -^^,7 , -I. I >> >:, 1. ? > >USAR, Agents, . / ? j?; 'i irfv.oyi -? .?! 3R, 8. C. '??: .- ' '! i|i'if'j w - T : 2 irt; ;r -*- . ! hit.s-jHI/i 'I -tt"': ;?tt? rrftg M">t?? ':ii r. * 1 OR GUA]> 0! I (CHANGE. . 1 ED FERTILIZER^ ! MANIPULATED GUANO, OWING LIBERAL TREjt&'s i> paying in Cotton on the basis of) PER TOlf, it depot, (Plater/paying expen- [ termsis^jBlainj as.j^.jymjtuow.?iieu jSSuSJSthe y forTt; no matter how low the price may be, and tlity of this GUT AN (j tt rtJl&feuIlfED, and has ny thousand tons we have sold. Our Ageflt* Rtfl . u ::?j , WILCOX, GIBBS ?fc OO.y I > in Guano, Charleston, S. C., and Savannah, Ga. lie, 8. C. : ItoY tf litfV' :V> 5 i ?*>-<j // ' U J .f ' 8m. 'S*: WM. L. BBAlXLBf'S STANDARD FE&TS^S/ PBESTUP, BRO. & POLLARD, POLL ARD & D0yi ' COTTOfr FACT0E8, GEHEEAt Afflfltel, AUGU8TA, GEORGIA. i 'ruftiWv.tri /. SJutf w' it '136": "TV'" ' SBAalffiSKO spa^^OW!'GU A ^ , " C. C. COE'8 ?UPEKPHO?PHitTE OP LIMB, in bags, 200 lbs. ..,.,! vn-.??vi t BRADLEY'S AMMONIATED DISSOLVED < BONES, in begs, 200 lbs. < , ,<* '! J pa- The aboveStandard Fertiliaersihaving been in use for the past seven years in the 8ontb, with uoequaled success, are again offered at prioea that cannot tail, to give satisfactions while the standard is guaranteed to be equal, if not superior to. any oversold, h $48 SEA-FOWL GUANO is well adapted io.red land, and it is said by practical formers that 176 pounds of tbis Guano is equal to fiGQ pounds of the,generality of other Guanoe. < Yon can pay for this Guano in cotton or money. The nrlosaKre as follows: Cash, April 1st, 1876, fto; Time, w pounds. Freight 97.60, td be paid when theGu#b.O is taken away. ' ' .GJutu if-40 dt i W. H. A J. P. HERFfDON, Agents. FMmmryr""-' " M , ?? ' .1 '-Ml J ?'*?II*! 11" n I I.I.JUH , 4f i ll hut. ?r. r;Ab<r / '/< I J IT 2 2 Ml J ::: S T^HHE COOKING STOVES manufactured at our I works in Greensboro, N. Cn givesmlvprsal ?wS? ier and thicker plate than any other Stovain the market, and consequently will the longer withstand beat and bard usage. They are of band some pattern and neat finish, and warranted equal In every other respect to any Cooking Stove sold in the United States, while It is confidently elalned that they are the CHEAPEST. All the usual pieces or ware and oooking utensils are furnished with each Stove. An Important consideration with purchasers is the fact that our patterns and sizes are newer changed. ? PhopME i tffece get accidentally broken at any time, we.can regdaqs ^at the mere cost of casting. .Not simply pegjjtyLscpt is a home production, hot op accountof ifii intrinsic merits as an article of household'eoQp<pnja,<lo we ask the patronage of home purchasers, More than ONE THOUSAND of these 8toyes are-now 0 in use, and among many otherstyyhjft |themwe respectfully refer to the following; R. E. Guthrie, D. M. Campbell, M. H. Currenoe, York scanty: Mrs. Elizabeth J. Wylie, Chester; D. . Gordon, Guthriesville; Jojip A. Brown*Book Hill; B. P. Boyd, Joseph Herndon, L. M. Grist, Yorkyille. You can save the freight from the northera^dties and the dealer's profit,. which is. no PflwT Item, by buying of us, and 'at tfie same time get a STOVE THAT IS MORE DURABLE thinibose of northern make. The followihgareooriirioea delivered at depot in Gtoetoibdh?: 1 Ns ? VP if "'r* fr "d?fcg* igiM T. M. DOBSON A CO., Agenta, YorkVmA SUE. ^ JOHN R. LONDON, Agent, Rock-Bill* ?. CT * i A. P. LINDSAY, Agent, LowrysvlMe,1 Chester county. 8. 0. : l.! iv J. L. CARROLL, Agent at Chester,8. 0. * COFFINS. ! .n JUST received and in my Shop, a large supply of WOOD COFFINS AND CASKlfTO) <<*11 % sizes and qn^ities, already trimmedspd finished hand, a fall assortmentof METALIO iCASBS and CASKETS. J. E. SMITH, Agent, October28 48 H tj4fn ivi- iTd#: ?fce f otMIe <Npiwir. Ohe oopy, six months,1 80 One copy, three months; ....JJ 1 00 Single copy.......?. t 10 Two copies, one year,' .'.'..V.V.' B 00 o0! more names, an extra oopy of the paper will be furnished one year, free of charge.