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Humorous fJcpartmrnt. A PRACTICAL JOKER. Of existing practical jokers, perhaps the most remarkable is a French musician. If he has not arrived at the proud pinnacle only attaiued by a Hook, it may be because opportunity is wanting, or such things are hardly regarded in the same innocent light now as they were thirty or forty years ago, and are punishable offenses. By profession a French horn player, whether his jokes are used as a method of reclame or not, we do not care to determine about. As an artist he stands without a rival. On his instrument he possesses an ampleur, a pureness of sound, a degree of feeling, a power of executing, which are unsurpassed. He has even accomplished the impossible feat on this difficult instrument, of playiuga distinct first and secoud or au accompaniment, all at the same time. But even the wonderful musical attainments he possesses are subservient to his practical jokes. Playing every known instrument with wonderful skill, a true Bohemian, he has been known to delight a public fair, followed by an attendaut in a cart, in which was a piano and a stock of instruments and to play on each ; one in turn, only that iustead of receiviug money from the crowd he would distribute it after the performance. Of course this brought, such a throng that all the booths were desert ed, and the business of the fair had to be discontinued until the gratuitous musician was removed. Going to London some years ago, he became such a nuisance that the guardians of the peace were only glad when his musical engagements were over and he left for France. A favorite amusement of his was to leave his lodgings with a dressing-case in his hand, and going to a cab station to select a certain vehicle. Getting inside, he would direct cabby to drive to some public square, selecting one of the most thronged in Londou. Having arrived there he would order a halt, and request cabman to block the wheels. Inside the cab our practical joker would take oft' his coat, put on a robe de chambre, and then proceed to unpack his dressing case. A small mirror would then be hung to the carriage windows, and on the seats would be arranged all the articles necessary for a most luxurious shave. Calmly unconscious of the first two or three little boys, who were watching the operation, somewhat amazed at seeing a man's face covered with lather, gazing at them in the most undisturbed manner, this tiny nucleus would very soon form the centre of a large crowd. ( Certainly from the deliberate movements of the gentlemau in the cab nothing but the most perfect shave would satisfy him. The assemblage would split their sides at the comical way with which he approached the neighborhood of his nose, when shavin? his unDer lin. " J ~ * O II I ' I or shriek with horror, fearful that they would witness a suicide, as he would draw his razor across his throat. At last the street would become impassable, and a policeman would enter upon the scene, edging his way with J difficulty through the crowd, and the matter would end by the arrest of the practical joker as a disturber of the public peace. Before the magistrate, when condemned to pay a fine, the musician would allege "that London was so dark, so foggy, that he never could sec to shave himself, except in the street, and not liking to sit on the curbstone, or on a house step, he had thought that a cab transformed into a dressing-room was not only the most ingeuious, but a very intelligent way of getting rid of his superfluous beard." Never at rest, traveliug from one part of the continent to another, his chief object in life seemed to be to worry custom-house officials. Arriving at some particular country, where the ideas of free trade were of the most eulightened character, provided with a quantity of baggage, an inimitable actor, he would pretend to conceal two of them, a huge trunk and a smaller one, from the eyes of the officials, only the more to excite their curiosity. At last the large trunk would be opened. It would be found to contain thousands of second-hand pantaloon straps, au appendix to trousers now perfectly obsolete. In vain the Custom-house people would cudgel their brains to solve the mystery. They had to be all bundled out to the very last one, but to their amazement no two straps were found to be alike. They had evidently been packed by hvdralic pressure, for the most frantic efforts on the part of the employees would not put them back again into the trunk. In the meantime, hundreds of passengers were storming at the detention, while the practical joker calmly looked on at the bother he was causing. But the second and smaller trunk was now to be examined, and the Custom-house people hoped there to hud him in default. They ask for the key. The practical joker draws bunches of ponderous keys from every one of his pockets; none will fit, until at last their patience exhausted, the Custom-house officer threatens to burst the truuk open. Then the possessor of this particular trunk, calmly askstheangry officer if he is married. "What is thatyour business ?" is his surly reply. "Only this, that before you open that truuk I would advise you to go home, shake hands with your wife, kiss your little children, write your will, and call at an undertaker's as you come back, there are rattlesnakes in that trunk. I never travel without them." Of course the man leaves the trunk instantly, and a messenger has to be sent to the head director, who is shrewd enough to be aware that he has to do with some practical joker. Presently the official returns, and asks pompously: "How | many snakes have you, sir" "Only six," is the reply ; "Look for yourself." "Oh! only six. The head of the department says six snakes can pass, but that seven would have had to pay duty. I am also directed to state to you, that if you do not leave this office?pantaloou straps, snakes, and all?in five minutes, you will be forcibly ejected." "And who is to repack my precious straps, a collection unequaled in the world ? The law entitles me to all my goods. You took them out, put them back again. The best period of my life is being devoted to finding pairs for those straps. | But I am in the cruel grasp of the law, aud j have no one defend my rights, save this, my j champion ana here the practical joKer uncovers his head, surmounted by a peculiar high hat, from whence appears a snow-white diminutive Bantam cock. The chicken raises ! himself up from the joker's head, claps his J wings, crows three times, the hat is put on i again, the chicken goes to roost on his head, j and, having in about fifteen minutes driven ! the Custom-house people to madness, besides | annoying a host of anxious travelers, the j practical joker disappears. A gentleman, whose morning dram had been a little too much for him, in saddling i his horse got the wrong end foremost. Just! as he was about to mouut, a German friend J came up and called his attention to the mis- j take. The horseman gazed for a moment at | the intruder as if in deep thought, and then ; said : "You let that saddle alone. How do i you know which way I am going ?" And the gentleman from Germany passed on. Unseen Happiness.?A Louisville girl : came blushing iuto the parlor the other night, j and told her father, when he noticed her bloom, that she had been enjoying unseen happiness. The old gentleman thought she had been | praying and was glad, as he is a pious man ; but instead the wicked lass had been kissed by her lover in the unlighted hall. As a fashionable young lady, fresh from boarding school, came to her honest old father's breakfast-table, instead of speaking English, and saying, "Good morning," she spoke French, and said, "Bou jour." "Of course the bone's yours, if you say so," reponded the practical old gentleman, as he handed her the ossified portion of a beefsteak. ? There was a certain darkey who owned a pig, and one day he gave him a bucket of mush. Said the darkey: He eats the whole bucketful of mush, and den I put de darn little cuss in the bucket, and he didn't fill it up half full. The question for philosophers to settle is, what became of the mush. JUjtintltuyal department. THE HABIT OF OBSERVATION. The labor of certain minds is often attribu. ted to genius, when it is the result only of systematic and close observation. A German workman in a gypsum stone i quarry was in the habit of traveling across ' a field in going to and returning from his work ; a clergyman of the name of Meyer, located in the neighborhood, soon observed a ' much greater luxuriauce in the grass on | each side of this path thau elsewhere in the : field. This result he traced to the gypsum or 1 plaster dust shaken from the workman's i olnthes on his wav over the field. This sim ! pie observation laid the foundation for the i extensive use of plaster as a fertilizer, since the middle of the last century. | Agriculture presents an immense field for | observation, and it has the largest corps of observers, 2,600,000 proprietors of farms, who might by a proper system of observation, in a few years, settle most of the vexed questions that now distract this occupation ; but the great mass of them travel the same road, year after year, like the German workman in the quarry, without noticing anything on either side, leaving the practical instruction to be drawn by outside observers. Look at the immense progress made in some departments of agriculture, when under the eye and hand of a skillful observer. Instance the breeding of Short-horns by Bates Colling, of Long-horns, cart horses and sheep by Bakewell. The sole foundation for their success beyond all breeders before them, was acting upon the hints suggested by close observation. Rarey masters the wildest passions of the horse that no other hand could curb or guide by putting in practice the simplest observations. Thomas Jefferson, in a short tour through France and Germany, occasionally observed the shape of the mold boards of their plough, and soon mastered the mathematecal principles upon which it must be constructed, and from his mechanical description, written at that time, have come all the modern improvements. The habit of observation, developed in the general farmer, is the one thing most needful now in the progress of agriculture. Every farmpp lias it. in his nmvnr tn add something to the general stock of definite knowledge of his occupation. The reader of agricultural jour uals often finds experiments given which would be of great value if all the circumstances were noted, so that he might determine whether it would apply to his case. But the writer has, perhaps omrnittcd to state the most important point, and for the want of information, the experiment has no value. Soils are almost infinite in variety of texture and situation, and au experiment with a given crop, to be of any value to the distant reader, | must not only give an intelligent discription of the soil, but the latitude or temperature, the point of inclination or aspect, the prevailing wind, etc. What creates such utter confusion aud contradiction of experiments, is the want of proper observation of all the circumstances that must affect the result. The farmer needs to be induced to observe, and there is probably nothing that will contribute more to this, than the formation of clubs for discussion. Here he finds other minds who take note of his statements and point out their defects. He learns to think differently aud accurately, aud the parent of thought is observation. If he proposes to make any statement about the yield of butter from his cows, he sees the necessity of noting the amount of milk required to make the butter, that it may be seen whether a large yield is due to a large quantity of milk or to its extra quality. Let every farmer observe the exact yield of each cow for one year, and how many of his herd will be for sale; take note of the product of field, and the management of many will be changed the second year, accurately note the time of planting or sowing each field nf (renin hthI tlip state nf the weather. and lie will soon know more about the proper time to plant and sow; let him in short, observe accurately everything relating to the management of his farm and stock, and he will soon admit that the time used in making these observations has paid him better than his hardest labor.?Live Stock, Farm and Fireside Journal. PREPARING BONES FOR FERTILIZERS. Of all agents that can be employed for decomposing aud dissolving bones, the best and most practicable are wood-ashes. They are gcucrally plentiful in country places, they prevent any uupleasant odor from being given off, and, above all, cause a rapid and complete decomposition. The bones are converted into a fine powder, which, mixed with the ashes, furnishes an excellent fertilizer, very rich in potash aud phosphoric acid. The method, of using them is as follows : A trench three or four feet deep aud of any desired length, is dug in the earth filled with alternate layers of ashes and whole bones, each layer being about six inches thick. The lowest as well as the top layers are of ashes, and each layer of ashes is thoroughly saturated with water. At distances of three feet, poles are rammed down to the bottom of the ditch, and every eight or ten days they are taken out and enough water poured in the holes to saturate the ashes. At the end of two mouths the whole heap is thoroughly stirred up with a fork, so as to mix the ashes and softened bones, which are then left to ferment again, water being added as often as necessary. In about three months ? *k<-. Vtnnrv koinr. u-nrL-oil nndp f\vir>p nr til tCi y UUUg ? Vi UUM V? V* V .. *vv W | three times more, the decomposition of the | bones will be so complete that only a few of i the largest remain, aud these are taken out j and put into another heap. Where wood ashes are scarce, recourse mu9t j be had to horse-manure. The boues are soaked i a few days in water and then placed in rectangular pits with alternate layers of horsemauure, each layer being drenched with the water in which the bones were soaked. The strata of bones are three inches thick, and! those of manure a foot thick. The pit is covered with earth, so as to be tightly closed.! The decomposition of the bones will require, in this case, about ten months, when the mixture is ready for use as a fertilizer.?Journal of Applied Chemistry. We have never seen the experiment of disintegrating bones with ashes, tried exactly as; described above, but are inclined to think the ; lime given rather too short, unless the bones i are fresh, and therefore disposed to ferment i and decay.?Ed. Southern Cultivator. Lame Mare.?I have an eight year old \ mare that was taken lame about one year ago, J with stifle. Sometimes you would hardly no-1 tice that she was lame, aud the next day she j will hardly touch her foot to the grouud.?M.! E. M., Berlin, Wi3. The stifle of your mare is not out, nor like- j ly to be. There may be some injury there,' causing the lameness. My opinion is, your , mare is troubled with a rheumatic fever, chief- j ly located in the joint you speak of. Should ' the stifle become dislocated, your marc would be entirely worthless. Remedy.?Procure one pound of oak bark, hr>il five minutes iu six niuts of water. When cool, add two piuts strong acetic acid. Bathe ' the affected parts as often as convenient, the oftener the better. Internally give 1 oz. acetate colchicum every morning for about a week. Then give, in as little water as the I mare will take it, 20 grains iodide potassa, for ten days or more. Give 1 oz. pulverized charcoal three or four times a week. Let it be I from sound wood and quite clcau. + Treatment of Broken Legs.?They have a new way of treating the broken legs ofhorses, which ought to be generally known. A valuable horse iu Hartford, Conn., had his leg broken a short time since. The leg was carefully set by an experienced surgeon, and wascovered thickly with plaster Paris. When the plaster "set" or hardened, it kept the limb as immovable as if it had been made of iron. Thus treated, a broken leg, it is as; serted, will knit together in a brief time, and j I become as good as ever. (SMta's Department. [Original.] COMMON SENSE, j Knowledge and wisdom do not mean the ; same thing. A man of knowledge is a man who has accumulated a vast multitude of facts in his mind; a wise man is one who j makes a proper use of what he knows. A } man may know a great deal and yet be little, if any better than a fool. He may know a great many things, and still make no use, or ! an unwise use of them. On the other hand, an individual may not be possessed of exten' sive knowledge, but still be a wise man, bei cause his knowledge is properly applied. Learning and knowledge mean uearly the I same thing. It is possible for a man to be 1 very learned and at the same time ludicrously j ignorant. This may seem to be a contradiction ; but whatever appearances may indicate the fact is incontrovertible. This is not the only seeming contradiction which we meet with in life. There are multitudes of persons in this world who have great mental powers, and yet they have very little sense. It would : not be a difficult thing to find men who could ; talk metaphysics all day ; discourse most flu; ently on the stars; reason logically on theol j ogy, who are as ignorant as babes about the ! common affairs of life. We once heard of a man who had the reputation of a learned theologian, who had no ! idea of the weight of a log of wood, and who, : ou one occasion, attempted to carry a log : which would have been a sufficient load, if it had been placed on a wagon, for two horses. Another reputed learned man, went to a j provision store to lay in a year's provision for I himself and wife. His purchases consisted of ! a tierce of rice, a pound of coffee, and half a j a pound of sugar. On arriving at his residence, he congratulated his wife that they were safe for one year. Another learned man, on one occasion, walkj ed into the garden and saw the beans which j his wife had planted, had come up with the . old bean attached to the stem. He at once j concluded that his wife's beans had made a I grand mistake in coming up wroug end fore1 most, and he at once determined to pull them up and reverse the euds. This he did to the great annoyance of his wife. It would be easy to multiply to any extent, ! instances of learned men doing senseless things. In some respects these men were great, and it may be, wise men ; but in many j others, they were great fools. They had ! much of what is called book learning, but ! knew nothing of what is called the common j affairs of life. Ignorance of the common afi fairs of life, often subjects us to much incon| venience, and affords others many a good ! laugh at our expense. j Once a young preacher, just from the semij nary, was sent out on a missionary tour. It I was before the days of railroads, and he was j obliged to ride. Strange as it may seem, it was to him a subject of much anxiety to know ! on what he would feed his horse. He seems ; to have known that the horse must live by eating; but what he would eat, he seems not to have known. Late in the evening of his first day's travel, he fell in company with a couutry boy and made known his troubles. I The boy was what is usually called a wag, j who had more fondness for a good joke than j he had respect for the clergy. On being ! asked what horses were fed upon, he replied, | "Irish potatoes." Night came on and the ! young clergyman stopped at the house of a j farmer and bought half a bushel of Irish po| tatoes and poured them into the horse trough | for his horses' supper. When morning came I he bought another half bushel; but on going j to the stable he fouud that the horse had not touched the potatoes given him on the previous evening. The wag had gone to the house j with the young clergyman to enjoy the fun. j A little common sense would have saved this ' young man from being thus imposed upon, and | certainly would have done him no harm, so far as converting sinners and consoling saints | was concerned. Book learning is a good thing; but a little j book learning and a little common sense, is far better than extensive book learning and i no common sense. Sometimes men think it I makes them appear great in the eyes of othi ers not to know anything about little things. This may be so ; but it will be a long time ! before plain people will regard the man who " ? ?a U..4. does not know wneai iroiu oais nu^uung uut i a bom fool. Sometimes young people affect ! ignorance of the common affairs of life, supj posing that-by tbis means they will make the j impression upon the minds of others that they i are very rich, and have beeu raaised in great 'luxury and ease. "We once heard of a young girl who feigned that she did not know a cow from a sheep. We say feigned she did not know a cow from a sheep, for surely no mortal, not an idiot, could be so ignorant. If she did not know the difference between these two domestic animals, it was a shame to her, and if she feigned not to know, she was very silly. In either case she was an object of pity, and should have been sent to the cow-pen and sheep-fold to learn a little sense. No practical young man would like to marry such a girl. Run fok tiie Lilly-Pads.?"How many of you boys ever went fishing?" asked the minister. Instantly fifty boys'eyes sparkled, and fifty boys' hands were raised. "How many of you ever fished for pickerel ?" continued the minister. Up came most of the hands again?little hands that, as the minister knew, had been nearly every one of them guilty of taking what was not theirs; for they belonged to boys who were in a reform school, and most of them for stealing, some little and some much. "Did you ever have any trouble in getting the pickerel to bite?" asked the minister. "Yes, sir!" cried the boys. "So have I," he replied. I have fished for pickerel a great many times; often in a certain pond behind my father's house, which was very clear and smooth, and covered with water lilies. These lilies were beautiful, lying with their pure white petals and goldeu centres on their floating leaves; but I did not rt 1171 T like to sec them, lor inis reason: mien xi trailed iny line with a fat little frog or a nice i little minnow on it, if I saw a pickerel swim round and rouud, looking at it, and working j his mouth and gills, I knew that pretty soon j he would jump up and snap at the tempting bait, and then I had him. If he once began . to look I was sure of him; but if, instead, he turned and swam off under the lily-pad, as : many a fish did, I knew I had lost him, and ; there was no use skimmiug and dancing my line to that fish any longer. I "Now, boys, I want to tell you, when you see something you wish for, which is not yours, j or when you feel like saying a bad word, or j ; going where you know you ought not to go, do not stop to look at it or think about it, but : just run for the lily-pads."?Apples of Gold. SST Cultivate an humble, willing and docile 1 mind, or desire to be instructed in the ways of j j God; for persuasion enters like a sunbeam, I gently and without violence; and open but the window and draw the curtain, and the Sun of Righteousness will enlighten your darkness.?Jeremy Taylor. ficadtttfl fat the JWrtoitlt. ! CONDUCTED BY j REV. ROBERT LATHAN. [Original.] THIS WORLD'S GOODS. It i3 uo easy matter to use this world so as | not to abuse it. Man's relationship to this world is such that he mu9t be diligent in business, or expose himself to the disapprobation ! of God. On the other hand, if he goes too : far, he makes a god of this world and becomes ; an idolater. There is nothing criminal in j being rich, neither is there anything merito| rious in being poor. The rich man is not ! necessarily a great sinner, nor does it follow j as a matter of course that the poor man is a ' devoutly pious man. It seein9 that God, in | his providence, bestows upon certain individuals, an abundance of the good things of this world, that they may do good to others. From other individuals, God, for wise and holy purposes, withholds the good things of this world, or bestows them with a sparing hand, in everything God does, he has a purpose. He made nothing in vain, and as a God of providence, he does nothing in vain. When God grants us a talent lie expects us to use it for his glory, our own good, aud the good of all with whom we may come in contact. It is inconceivable that God would bestow upon any of his creatures facilities for doing evil. Hence, we may conclude that when this world's goods are so used as to be injurious ; to the good of any of God's creatures, they | are abused. If wealth is procured for the purpose of being useful, it is right and proper; but if it is amassed for the purpose of gratifying our sinful lusts, it is subverted from its original design, and is sinful. On the other hand, if we are idle or prodigal in our habits, and neglect to make any provisions for those whom God has made dependant upon us, we sin and make ourselves liable to be visited with poverty, infamy and shame. + * [Original.] EXTREMES. 1 Ancient mycologists tell us of two fearful raousters, Scylla aud Charybdis, situated on opposite sides of some imaginary strait. The mariner found it, according to the mythological accouut, very difficult to pass these raouI i._ 9ters. in avoiding ocyim, ne was unuic iu go too near Charybdis and be devoured. The reverse was also true. These monsters, Scylla and Charybdis, had no existence only in the brain of the poet Homer ; but the journey of every man through this world has something connected with it which may serve as a base for the poetic fiction. Life, when we contemplate it in its realities, is very much like a voyage in a narrow sea with dangerous whirlpools on opposite sides. The path of rectitude aud virtue is narrow, and it is with the greatest difficulty that dangerous extremes are avoided. The current, with great power, draws us to one side or the other. The farther we get from the middle course, the stronger the drifting strength of the waves. In a moment when we yield to right hand temptations or left hand defections, we find ourselves drawn toward the vortex of destruction. The path of virtue, morality and true religion runs on a ridge, and these extremes are at a fearful distance below it; but it is wonderful with what rapidity the descent is made. There is a constant tendency iu the human family to run into these extremes. Men are inclined to be either too rigid or too slack ; to be righteous above what is written, or to be extremely wicked. The Athenians were too religious, and the Sodomites were abominably wicked. The former worshipped the gods of every nation, and had an altar dedicated to the unknown * 1 -- 3 L.a god; the lorraer worsnippea no goo, dui plunged recklessly into all manner of crime. So it is yet. Sometimes we try to do more than is required of us; and again at other times we perversely neglect to perform every thing that is required, and do everything that is forbidden. Nothing will save us from the utter destruction which awaits us but the preserving grace of God. But for the restraining hand of God we would rush headlong into a vortex of ruin. AN ILLUSTRATION. A striking illustration of the mutual love that exists between Christ and a true disciple, as drawn by a masterly hand. Xenophon, the historian, tells us, in the Cyclopaedia, that when Cyrus the Great, on his march of conquest, approached the borders of Armenia, Tygranes fled with all of his family, determined not to be exposed to the tyranny of such a monster as he had heard Cyrus to be. The conqueror was too sharp for him ; he intercepted his flight across the mountains, captured the king and all his retinue. To show his magnanimity, Cyrus offered' to allow Tygranes to pass sentence on each one of his own officers as they were brought before the court. He could not induce him to open his lips until the queen was presented. Then , Tygranes leaping to his feet, said, "Oh! king, ' I would die rather than she should be enslaved." Cyrus admiring his conjugal fidelity, dismissed them, telling Tygranes that he might enjoy all of his royal prerogatives, if he would become and remain his faithful ally. When they had withdrawn from the presence of Cyrus, each of the courtiers had some word of praise to bestow upon the Persian conqueror. One admired tho majesty of his person ; another the magnanimity of his soul until they had all exhausted their encomiums when Tygranes noticing that the Queen had not even expressed any gratitude for their restoration to their dominions, said to her : "Aud what dost thou thiuk, Oh! Armenian Queen, of Cyrus ?" She replied, "I did not see him." "Whom, then,didst thou see?" "I saw only him, who said, 'I would rather die, than that she should be enslaved !'" Is it not a forcible illustration of Jesus' love for his people; Not ouly was Christ willing to die, but actually did shed his blood on Calvary, that his people might not be enslaved by sin. And as soon as the sinner can appreciate this love and realize its fullness, freeness, unselfishness, he cannot see any other object. No created being, no imaginary gratification, nothing whatever can attract him from the Cross and from his zeal, love, adoration and desire to please that Saviour, who first loved him aud gave himself for him. All Have a Work to Do.?There is room in the Church, and need for all manner of workers. The poorest aud least recognized are as much needed as any. Open your watch, vour eve falls on jewels there. But the sparkling jewels cannot say to the modest coil of steel beside them, "We have no need of thee," for that is the mainspring. And the mainspring cannot say to the tiniest cogwheel, "We have no need of thee," for without it the works stand still. It is just so iu the church of Christ. One little worker can mar the whole by failing to fulfil its office. There is a place for each. BST The judicious Hooker used to say, "If I had no other reason and motive for being religious, I would earnestly strive to be so for the sake of my mother?that I might requite her care for me, and cause her widow's heart to sing for joy." _ ?; j 5?" Profanity never did any man the least good. No man is richer, or happier, or wiser for it. It commends no one to society, it is disgusting to the refined, and abominable to I the good. ihc ?0i'hviUc inquirer, i TEIIM8?IIV ADVANCE : One Copy, oneyear, f 3 00 One Copy, Six months, 1 50 i OneCopy, Threemontlis, 1 00 j Single Copy, 10 | Two Copios, ono year, 5 00 ! Ten Copies, " 44 25 00 : persons who make up clubs often or j more names, an extra copy of the paper will be ! furnished oneyear, free of charge. ADVERTISEMENTS Will be inserted at One Dollar and Fifty Cents ! per square for the first, and Seventy-live Cents j per square for each subsequent insertion-less than three months. A square consists of the space occupied by ten lines of this size type, or one inch. No advertisement considered less than a square. Semi-Monthly, Monthly, or Quarterly Advertisements, will bocharged Two Dollars per square for eacli insertion. Quarterly, Semi-Annual or Yearly contracts will bo made on liberal terms?the contract, however, must in all cases bo confined to the immediate business of the lirm or individual contracting. Obituary Notices and Tributes* of Kospeot, rated as advertisements. Announcements of Marriages and Deaths,and notices ofa religiouscharacter,inserted gratis, and solicited. 330- Personal Communications, when admissable; Communications of limited or individual interest, or recommendations of Candidates for offices of honor, profit or trust, will be charged for as advertisements. THE YORKVILLE ENQUIRER FOR 1874. IN issuing our prospectus of the TWENTIETH volume of the ENQUIRER, we are gratified to announce for the approaching year greater Literary attractions than we have ever heretofore ottered?having secured the services of POPULAR WRITERS Of distinction, as contributors to our columns. Among those as writers of Fiction, whom wo are now at liberty to mention, are Mrs. NELLIE MARSHALL McAFEE, of Kontuckv, and Mrs. HENRY DEAS, of California. Already is Mrs. Deas favorably known to our readers, as a brilliant and ontertaining writer ; and we can safely promise that the next story we shall publish from her pen isonc of greater power and more fascinating style than any sho has over yet written. Mrs. McAfee, though but recently engaged sis a contributor to the ENQUIRER, is well known in the world of letters, having commenced her literary career by writing for periodicals in 1863, and having been remarkably successful in every effort. J. Wood Dsividson, in his "Living Writers of the South," published in 1869, says : "She is just past twenty, and scorns full of youthful aspiration, and hopes, aud life. Sho puts her impulses, feelings and thoughts into literary forms with wonderful facility." Her second publication, entitled "As by Fire," a novel of passion-life, earnest, intense and full of pathos, appeared in 1S69, and was well received by the public. The New York Found Table spoke of tho volumo as being all "perpetual splendor," and that tho writer in her special delineations of character, displays abundant capacity to excel. The first number of the new volume will contain the opening chapters of a thrilling and highly exciting story by Mrs, McAfee, being her latest literary effort, entitled "DESTINY; OR HOUNDED DOWN." This Storv will run through several numbers of the ENQUIRER, and will be followed by ? HULLING WOOD HOUSE," a charming Story, written in Mrs. Deas' most entertaining and captivating style. These will be followed by other ORIGINAL STORIES, from the pens of the most popular writers, which, with Mr. LATHAN'S regular contributions to the "Sabbath Reading" and "Children's Departments;" Miscellaneous Reading, adapted toall tastes; the Agricultural Department, containing practical and useful information for the farmer and housewife ; a column of Humorous Reading every week ; "Scraps and Facts," embracing light current topics; together with a compeuuof tho News of the Day ; Correspondence from abroad, in which the sparkling letters of our REGULAR TRAVELING CORRESPONDENT, "Nemo," will boa prominent feature; Commercial and Market Reports, and Editorial Articles on appropriate subjects, will, we feel assured, render the ENQUIRER an acceptable visitor to all its readers. It is the aim of the proprietor to make the ENQUIRER A LITERARY AND FAMILY NEWSPAPER, acceptable alike to all classes of readers and a welcome visitor to the Home Circle, unwarped by party, creed or section; and tho foatures which have so greatly contributed to its popularity?securing for it a circulation attained by 110 other secular weekly in tho State?will remain unchanged. PREMIUMS FOR CLUBS. Wo offer three Premiums for the three largest Clubs of Subscribers, for the year 1874, amounting in the aggregate to SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLARS in cash. The first premium will represent the value of THIRTY-FIVE DOLLARS; the second, the value of TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS; and tho third, the value of FIFTEEN DOLLARS. Instead of designating certain articles as premiums, we have adopted the above plan, in order that persons who secure the premiums may select any articlethat may bo preferred of the value to which each may lie entitled, or receive the amount in cash, as may be optional. The person getting up the largest Club, at $2.50 for each subscriber, will bo entitled to the first of the above premiums ; the person getting up the second largest, to the second premium, and the person getting up the third largest, to the third premium. Competitors may liegin to procure subscribers at once?the time of subscription to commence whenever the name is handed in, or on the first of.January, 1874, as may ue preierrea. The money l'or each subscriber is expected to be paid whenever the name is entered 011 our books, and no name will bo entered in competition until it is paid for. To persons who make up Clubs of ten or more names, but who may fail to obtain a premium, we will send the ENQUIRER onoycar free of charge; and to those who sond a Club of twenty or more names, but Who may fail to get a premium, wo will forward a copy of the ENQUIRER one year free of charge, and a copy of either of the following publications: Southern Cultivator, Rural Carolinian, Rural New Yorker, Scientific American, Oodey's Lady's Book, Harper's Magazine, Harper's'Weekly, Harper's Bazar, Scribner's Monthly, Leslie's Illustrated Newspaper, Leslie's Magazine. The premiums will be awarded to the successful competitors at one o'clock, p. in., on tfie FIRST MONDAY IN MARCH, 1874. TERMS : Single copy one year, $ 3 00 In clubs, each subscriber, per year, 2 50 How to Rkmit.?Money may bo forwarded at our risk by draft, post-office order, or in registered letters?otherwise wo will assume no risk. Write names plainly, giving post-office, county and State. Specimen copies of the ENQUIRER will be sent to any address on application. Address all letters to U. M. GRIST, Proprietor, Yorkville, S. C. ^ f IJmLJeA.HrrrJrmv>mJ.firofor lfnn/i?ibrtr \ U j DB (H ' r* I SUteimdMb-iUMvdlesJIoorendJJnh \ if Sn ^ TttinjrjWhibPme,WaInatSxiyZaa5fff \ * I i H 0 UlniietMderjRuWbodiSLC^ \ V \% f , AU-WarKWaimtai, \ L : fa J LOWEST PRICES. ( r IS j SwLfirTri&Ll&h J ~ LH. HALL& CO,! fl tfmnfttiurtTt HDrtlarh J jja * %A- 0i BMKarJiet Stre&, ? ffil 223.225,2?dStEiy)' IS 3 CHARLESTON, S. 0. f| Tills (.'ui entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1873, by J. 11. Hall it Co., lu tlieolliee of the Librarian of Congies*, at Washington. July 3 27 ly Iron in the Blood #TIIE PEETTTIAN 8YISUP Vitalizes and Enriches tho Blood, Tones up tho System.Buildsuntho Broken-down, Cures Femalo Complaints, Dropsy, Debility,Humors, Dyspepsia, AcThousands havo been changed by tho uso of this remedy from weak, sickly, suffering creatures, to strong, healthy, and happy men and women; and invalids cannot reasonably hesitate to giro it a trial, Caution.?Bo sure you get tho right article. 8co that 14Peruvian Syrup" is blown in tho glass. Pamphlets free. Sendforono. 8ETH W. FOWLE & SONS, Proprietors, Boston, Mass. For sale by ! druggists generally. October 2 . 40 ly COFFEE. A LOT of first-rate Oofi'oe on hand and for sale i at the Grocery of T. M. POHSON A CO. J. H. ADAMS. FALL AND WINTER GOODS ! In announcing tlio receipt of my purchases for the j FALL TRADE, j it affords nie pleasure to inform my customers and the public generally that in point of elegance, my stock is QUITE COMPLETE. I am enabled to offer unprecedented attractions both in quality of Goods and prices. The Ladies will find full and complete linos of DRESS GOODS AND TRIMMINGS, including all the Novelties of the season. GENT'S CLOTHING AND FURNISHING. GOODS, of the best grades and MOST FASHIONABLE STYLES. ITATS, CAPS, ROOTS AND SHOES, with the usual assortment and variety kept IN A FIRST-CLASS HOUSE. Thankful for past patronage, and being determined to merit a continuance of the same, I respectfully sol feit AN EXAMINATION OF GOODS AND PRICES. JOHN H. ADAMS. Woofl's HoiseliI Magazine W b an original, flrst-claw, Dollar Monthly. It I* H O fresh and ?prtxlitly, ami will Interest tlio entire household, Including lovers nnil maidens, bus- w O bands and wives, parent* ami children. Itsug- p gests the importance of securing a union of p n hearts and purposes In life, before there .hall JE> ? lie* union of hands. It believe* that, while It A S I* woman'* privilege to purify ami comfort and | H adorn, it should be man's pleasure to provide *1 for, cherish, and protect. It would have chil- O Odren treated as feeling, thinking and growing creature*?perfectly created,but not full grown. T II Yet in advocating thro doctrine*, the Mitga- U ? zlne doc* not employ doctrinal sermons?long JJ 0 and dreary disquisition* which do not Interest O Eand therefore do not profit the reader. On (lie n contrary. It would rather preach as though It ?. Lf preached not?an interesting story,for Instance, F O** being made to serve the purpose of a long dls- jT course by giving the reader something real, In- OL Ltcresting and profitable to think about. J The worst a* well as the best feature of the n D Magazine Is Its price. The Idea or getting a V really first-class Magazine at one dollur a year, V M scctns absurd to most people. Yet it employs A A some of the best contributors In the country? H including Gail Hamilton, Its leading editor, Cwho receives a salary of three thousand dol- 3f Alars. equivalent to about ten dollars per day. P Eacn number contains nearly eight hundred p wm dollars' worth of matter, which costs the sub- ~ Mm scrlber about eight cents. ct I Ilopc and Joy?two beautifully tinted crayon portraits worth Four Dollars?will bo mailed *1 M fn flvprv subscriber to the Magazine at SI SO Specimens "free. Agents wnnled'. Address 8. E 8. WOOD St CO., Ncwburgh, N. y. Y floje ed Joy-Eoie an! Jov U United Voice of the Preii.?Wood's Ul I? magazine Is one of tho monuments of business " O enterprise which mark tho age.?Stethall-t llmnr. Q PJounuil, 1'hlla., i'a As its title promises, It Is devoted to the Instruction and entertainment U E of the family circle,and, In order to place It withe, In tho means of readers in moderate clrcum- ~f tt stances,lt U furnWied at a remarkably low rate K J In proportion to the Interest of Its contents.? If. 2 Oy.7V.4un/. ..It Isesscntlally a home magazine, n and Is just the thing that one would most desire Y to place In the hands of his wife and little ones, w m or that a man of business would himself take II rl up for tho employment of a leisure hour.?Pod ft Wilmington, N. C Were we out of our 5 n chair editorial, as a "private citizen," cut off * r from our cxchango list and all that,. ,ie of the E> ET first magazines to which we should subscribe U ? would be Wood's Household.?RrgiMer, Hart- "J Ot ford, Ct It Is an Intellectual and moral ft | educator, highly prized by all who become nc- , *JL quahlted with It?Christian Advocate. ....If L O popular writers are, therefore, good writers, n Yand if high prices prove tho merit of literary " wares, then Mr. wood's magazine is a good M H one.?The Initrjirnilrnt, New York Its arti- V Ocles brentlic a spirit of economy, morality and A virtue which is highly refreshing in this age of f\ P fashionable fully and extravngance.? Sentinel, V* EEdlna, Mo It Is undoubtedly one of tho A freshest, liveliest journals wo have examined. 5 A ?RernnU Springfield, Tenn The articles ?, J arc short, piquant, and of such unquestioned excellence, that this periodical ought to be both _ J ft familiar and welcome In vciy many house- |>| w holds. Wood's is a marvel or cheapness and T first-class quality combined.?.V?c i'uik Timet. b food's HonsoMd lapie CONNER, HOBBS & DOBSON. THE YORKVILLE COACH FACTORY. THE undersigned respectfully inform the public that they are still manufacturing CARRIAGES, BUGGIPjS and all otuer styles 01 nguk vcmu? at the shop formerly occupied by B. T. WHEELER, near the depot. Strict attention is given to the quality of materials employed in the construction of our work, which is warranted to bo as DURABLE as any in the market. OUR PRICES are as low as it is possible to afford work of the character which we turn out. ROCKAWAYS, BUGGIES and other pleasure CARRIAGES, always on hand, or finished at a few hours' notice. An inspection of our stock is respectfully solicited. REPAIRING promptly done at short notice. We sell only for cash, and all repairing and job work must be paid for on delivery. CONNER, HOBBS & DOBSON. GEO. S. HACKER, DOOR, SASH AND BUND FACTORY, CHARLESTON, S. C. TIIIS is as large and complete a Factory as there is in the South. All work manufactured at the Factory in this city. The only house owned and managed by a Carolinian in this line in Charleston. Send for price list. Address, GEO. S. HACKER, Post-Office box 170, Charleston, S. C. Factory and Warerooms on King street, opposite Cannon street, on line of City Railway. December5 49 " ly "BOOT AND SHOE MAKING.THE undersigned respectfully announces to his friends and the public in general, that he is prepared with A FINE STOCK OF MATERIAL, in his line, suitable to the wants of every customer, who may give him a call. They may not only obtain an article of good quality AT A REASONABLE PRICE, but are also certain to secure what is equally as desirable, a good fit and fashionable style. These iU U UUVilllU^un niiu ii ouvutu tivw wv ? ? Special attention is called to tho celebrated cloth top Congress Gaiter and the Congress Shoe FOR SPRING AND SUMMER WEAR. Also, on hand, a good stock of light and heavy BROGANS and OXFORD TIES, which are warranted to give entire satisfaction for the price paid. Special and prompt attention is given to repairing. F. CHRISTMAN, Agent. March 28 13 tf ANNUALRETURNS ADMINISTRATORS, Executors, Guardians and Trustees, are hereby notified to make their ANNUAL RETURNS, without further delay. Unless returns are made promptly, I will be under the necessity of issuing rules for default. , JOSEPH A. MdLEAN, Judge of Probate. | July 24 30 tf __ RAGS WANTEDTa OfkA POUNDS of clean cotton and lin0,1 KilKS Wftntcili for which 2conta por pound will be paid, at tho "ENQUIRER" OFFICE. 1 NOTICE. APPLICATION will be made at the next session of the Legislature for an amendment to the Charter of tho town of Yorkville. August 14 33 3m < THE YORKVILLE BRANCH ok th e mrs him stun ? Banking Oflice Opposite theStore of J. H. Adams. Deposits of $1 and Upwards Received. Interest allowed at the rate of 7 per cent, per annum on Certificates of Deposit, and 0 per cent, componnded every six months on accounts. PRINCIPAL OFFICE - COLUMBIA, S. C. WM. MARTIN, President. JOHN B. PALMER, Vice-President. A. G. BRENIZER Cashier. J. H. SAWYER, Ass't Cashier in general charge. JOHN C. B. SMITH, Local Assistant Cashier. Directors.?Wade Hampton, William Martin A p 1-Iatib-all V W \fn\faati*r E T-T TTpinituh John B. Palmer, Thos. E. Gregg, Columbia. J. Eli Gregg, Marion. G. T. Scott, W. G. Mayes, Newberry. B. If. Rutledge, D. Ravenel, Jr., Henry Buist, Charleston, Gen. Samuel MeGowan, Abbeville. BRANCHES IN SOUTH CAROLINA : Location. Local Ass't Cashiers. Charleston, D. RAVENEL, Jr. Orangeburg, J. H. FOWLES. Sumter, J. W. DARGAN. Spartanburg, GEORGE COFIELD. Newberry, T. S. DUNCAN. Laurens, Dr. JOHN* W. SIMPSON. Greenville, J. J. BLACKWOOD. Abbeville, Hon. D. L. WARDLAW. Camden, W. D. McDOWELL. Unionville, E. R. WALLACE Yorkville, W. B. METTS. FINANCE COMMITTEE AT YORKVILLE. B. T. WHEELER, J. H. ADAMS, L. M. GRIST. SIGHT DRAFTS drawn on all the Branches or the Bank in this State, and also on all the prominent places in the United States and Europe. pQr Stocks, Bonds, Gold and Silver bought and sold. Mutilated Currency purchased at a small discount. W. B. METTS, Assistant Cashier at Yorkville. Januarv 30 5 ly PIEDMONT AIE-inTE RAILWAY. T1ICHMOND AND ^DANVILLE, Richmond JX and Danville R. W., N. C. Division, and North-Western N. C. Railway. CONDENSED TIME-TABLE, In effect on and after Sunday, June 15th, 1873. GOING NORTH. STATIONS^ piATT. I ACCOMMODATION. Leave Charlotte i 2-jO 1'. M. " SalUbury 5.02 ? " Greensboro I 8.15 " | " Danville, 111.17 " ' 6.15 A.M. " Burkvlllc 3.34 A. M.j 11.40 ? Arrive nt Richmond....! 6.35 " | 2.55 P.M. GOING SOUTH' STATIONS. j MAIL, j ACCOMMODATION. Lenve Richmond ' 1.05 P. M.' 9.45 A.M. " Burkevllle 14.10 " ! 1.20 P.M. " Danville j 8.45 " Arrive 6.10 ' " Greeu?boro 11.38 " j " Snll*bury, 1 2.03 A. M.j Arrive at Charlotte ! 4.05 " j EAST AND WEST j~GOlNG EAST. | GOING WEST. 8TATION8. j MAILT i MAIL! Leave Greensboro I g 8.20 P. M. I Arrive 10.48 P. M. " Company Shops., i & 10.00 " ? 9.30 " " Hlllsboro 'a. 11.10 " = 7.47 " " Raleljrh | 1.40 A.M. j "S 5.26 " Arrive at Goldsboro , ? 4.30 " | ~ Leave 2.30 P. M. N O RT H - WEST E RN N. C. RAILKOAD. (salem branch.) Leave Greensboro 3.40 P. M. Arrive at Kernersvllle, 5.10 P. M. Lenve Kerncrsvllle 9.00 A. M. Arrive at Greensboro 10.30 A. M. Mail trains daily both ways over entire length of roads. Accommodation daily between Danville and Richmond. (Sundays excepted.) On Sundays Lynchburg Accommodation leaves Richmond at 8.25 A. M.; arrives at Burkevllle 11.28 A. M.; leaves Burkevllle 1.10 P. M.; arrives at Richmond 4.17 P. M. Pullman Palace Cars on all night trains between Charlotte and Richmond, (without change.) For further information, address S. E. ALLEN, General Ticket Acent, T. M. R. TALCOTT. Greensboro, N. C. Engr. and Gen. Supt. THE SHORT LINE SCHEDULE. CHARLOTTE, COL. & AUGUSTA R. R. CO.,) Columbia, S. C., October24,1873. j THE following Passenger Schedule will be run over this road on and after SUNDAY, 26th instant: going north. Train No. 2. Train No. 4. Leave Augusta 6.30 A. M. 4.15 P. M. " Graniteville ?7.33 A. M. 5.11 P. M. 44 Batesville,..: 9.43 A. M. f7.22 P. M. 44 Columbia 11.58 A. M. 9.37 P. M. " Chester, +4.28 P. M. 2.28 A. M. Arrive at Charlotte. ..{7.08 P. M. *5.15 A. M. No. 2 Train makes close connection, via Richmond, to all points North, arriving at Now York at 6.40 A. M.; also, via Raleigh ana Old Bay Line, arriving at New York at 4.25 P. M. No. 4 Train makes close connection, via Richmond, to all points North, arriving at New York at 4.25 P. M. going south. Train No. 1. Train No. 3. Leave Charlotte, *7.00 A. M. 8.30 P. M. 44 Chester, 9.54 A. M. 10.58 P. M. 44 Columbia. {2.48 P. M. 3.40 A. M. 44 Batesville 4.57 P. M. 5.43 A. M. 44 Graniteville,...f7.15 P. M. *7.48 A. M. Arrive at Augusta, 8.05 P. M. 8.45 A. M. Breakfast. {Dinner. {Supper. South bound Trains connect at Augusta for all points South and West. Through tickets sold and baggage checked to all principal points. Sleeping cars on all Night Trains. JAMES ANDERSON, General Sup't. E. R. Dorsey, Gen. Passenger and Ticket Agent. CHERAW AND DARLINGTON E. ROAD. # ^ PRESIDENT'S OFFICE, ] UHKKAW Ot J^AKLilJ>UTUr? IVAILHUAU r Society C., October 10,1873. J CHANGE OF SCHEDULE. OX and after MONDAY, 13tb of October, the passenger train will run as follows: Down Train. Up Train. Lenvn Clioraw 8.00, A. M. Leave Florence....3.00, P. M. Leave C'anli's 8.30, A. M. Leave Palmetto,. ...3.30, P. M. Leave Society Hill.8.45, A. M. Leave Darlington. ..3.40, P. M. Leave Dove'a 9.15, A. M. Leave Dove's 4.15, P.M. Leave Darlington. .9.50, A. M. Leave Society Hill.4.45, P. M. Leave Palmetto...10.10,A. M. Leave Cash's 5.10, P.M. Arrive at Florence. 10.30, A. M. Arrive at Cheraw..5.30, P. M. The Freight Train will continue for the present to run as heretofore, except to adapt its running and stoppages to the changed schedule of the passenger train. B. D. TOWNSEND, President. KING'S MOUNTAIN^TROAD. CHANGE OF SCHEDULE. HEREAFTER the trains over the KING'S MOUNTAIN RAIL ROAD will run daily, (Sundays excepted) as follows, making close connection with trains on the Charlotte, Columbia and Augusta Railroad: Leave Yorkville, promptly,at 7o'clock, A.M. Arrive at Chester at 9 o'clock, A. M. Leave Chester at4i o'clock, P. M. Arrive at Yorkvilleat GJ o'clock, P. M. All Freights must be delivered at the Depot by 4 o'clock, P. M., on the evenings previous to the departure of the train. GEORGE W. MELTON, President. Cooking' and Heating Stoves at Retail. Pic.... /til fll 11 1/U.l VfA AVA* AMJk* descriptions, as well as prices and lists of* furniture for Cook Stoves, will be promptly sent on apj>lication? WILLIAM SHEPHERD & CO., Charleston, S. C. September 4 36 6m A SENSIBLE MAN'S LOGIC. HE who provides not for his own family, is worse than a heathen. Necessaries and conveniences should first be provided. A good SEWING MACHINE has become a necessary in every family. The "AMERICAN" IS TlfE BEST AND CHEAPEST; containing within itself all the latest improvements. Therefore I will goat once and buy one of J. R. SCHORB <ft SON, Agents for York County. UNION-HERALD. I AM agent for this sprightly daily, published at the Capital of the State. It contains the latest telegrams, market reports and general news, and reaches Yorkville on the day of publication. Subscriptions received for twelve, three and six months. Terms: Oneyear, $7; six months, $3.50; three months, $1.75. W. L. GRIST, News Agent. \ rrputa lliaY learn something greatly to their advantage and obtain specimens and full particulars free, by addressing WOOD'S LITERARY AND ART* AGENCY, Newburgh, N. Y. LOOKING GLASSES^ "T7 JUST roceived another lot of Looking Glasses at all prices. T. M. DOBSON A CO.