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HtHtwrous H'rpartmcnt. A CLERICAL JOKE. Many years ago there was in the eastern part of Massachusetts a worthy old D. D., and though he was an eminently benevolent man and a good Christian, yet it must be confessed he loved a joke much better than the majority even of inveterate jokers. It was before church organs were much in use, and it so happened that the choir of his church had recently purchased a double bass viol. Not far from the church was a large town pasture, and in it a huge town bull. One hot Sabbath in summer the bull got out of the field, and came bellowing up the street. About the church there was a plenty of untrodden grass, green and good, and Mr. Bull stopped to try its quality? perchance to ascertain if its location had at all improved its flavor?at any rate while the Dr. was in the midst of his sermon, boo-woowoolweiit the HaJX ^TEe clergyman paused, looked up at the'smiging seats with a "grave lac^e, and said, "I would thank the musicians not to tune their instruments during service time, as it annoys me very moch." The people stared, and the minister went on. Boo-woo-woo-woo went the bull as he pas^gd to another^ green spot. .The parson paused again and addressed the choir: "I do really, wish the singers would not tune their instruments while lam preaching, for, as I have already remarked, it annoys me very much." The people tittered, for they knew by the merry : twiukling of his eye that he knew as well as anybody what the real state of the case was?he went on with his discourse. Boo-wbo-woo said the bull. The parson stopped, and again said to the choir, "I have twice already requested the musicians in the gallery not to tune their instruments during sermon time. I do particularly request Lefavor, that you will not tune your 'double base viol' While I am preaching." Lefavor got up, much agitated at the idea of "speaking out in church," and stammered out: "It's not me, Parson B , it's th?th?th?that darn'd town bull." "Oh !" said the parson, "then the sexton will please drive away the bull." The people laughed ; but with a gratified look at the success of his joke he went on with his sermon. OSf A party of soldiers were sitting together talking of their adventures during the war, and, as is generally the case, some pretty hard yarns were told. The conversation finally turned on promotions, when a tall Teutonic broke forth with: "I'll tell you something about that, boys. When I joined the. cavalry I hadn't been long in this country, and didn't understand much English. We were sent up in the Valley, and at the battle of Winchester we were ordered to charge a battery. Well, the captain gave the order to charge, and away'we went in fine-style. The Johnnies operted 6n its with grape and canister. Many a horse tumbled over, and plenty of saddles were emptied. That didn't make any difference ; we went straight ahead. Suddenjy the captain gave the order to retreat. The whole company turned and went back except me. You see I didn't understand the order, so I kept on and charged right in among them ; and, by Joe, I captured the whole battery and brought it iu myself. Now, I'll tell you how it turned out. The next day the captain was made a major, (he first lieutenant was made captain, and?"Well, what did they do with you ?" enquired a listener. "Why, they put me in the guard house because I wouldn't tell a lie." ^ The Hen-Pecked Man.?The hen-pecked man iz most generally married, but there are instances on record of single men being harrassed by the pullets. Yu can alwus tell one of these kind uv men, espesbily if they are in the company uv their wives. They look as resigned to their fate as a hen turkey on a wet day. There aint nothing that will take the starch out of a man like being pecked by a woman. It is wus than seven months of the fever and agyfhe wives of henpecked husbands most alwus outlive thair yictiras, and I have known them to get married agaiu and git hold ov a man that time, (thank the Lord 1) who understood all the henpeek dodges. One of these kind of husbands is an honor to his sex. The henpecked husband, when he gits out amung men, puts on airs uv bravery and defiance, and once in a while will git a leetle drunk anil then go home with a firm resolve *1 _ A. 1 _ * 1 1 I- _ A._ * - P t_ * 1 1 A. mat lie win ue captain 01 nis nousenoia; out the old woman soon takes the glory out of him, just as she would a half drowned chicken that had fell into a swill barrel and had to be jerked out awful quick.?Josh. Billings. A. Good Joke.?A good'joke is told of a little four-year-old fellow, who, having disobeyed his father, was about to incur the penalty of a switching. The father deliberately prepared a rod, while his son stood a sad and silent spectator. As the parent approached to the unpleasant duty, the boy started at a brisk run toward a neighboring hill. The father pursued, and for a time the youngster increased the distance between them, but gradually his strength begau to fail, and when he reached the hill and began to ascend he soon lost his advantage. .Nearer and nearer the irate father approached, and as he came within arm's length of the little fugitive, who was ready to fall from exhaustion, the boy quickly faced about, dropped upon the ground, and with an indescribable cast of countenance, exclaimed,? "Papa, that?makes a fellow?blow?don't it?" ^ ^ This "changing the subject" was so extremely ludricrons that the father laughed heartily over the strategy which his hopeful son exhibited, and the rod was not used. Be-aT The late Robert Hall, the celebrated Baptist preacher of London, who continued bis pulpit services long after disease had made him a great sufferer, was particularly sensitive to any want of attention on the part of his audience. On one occasion there was a great commotion in the choir, at the opposite end of the church, which at last he could bear no longer, and cried out: "What is the matter there ? I should thiuk the devil was among you." "No, sir; it's not the devil, but a lady wot's fainted, sir^and she's a very fat un, sir, and i ? . 1*1 1 i . _ i _ >i _ . 1 v sues not naeiy to come to, soon, sam one yi the choir. "Oh! in that case," returned Mr. Hall, in his most courteous manner, "in that case, I beg the lady's pardon, and?the devil's too." The Ark.?The Hartford horse-cars in the winter present such a ridiculous appearance, with their canvas covers, that once were white, but now are of an indefinable color, that the following dialogue seems very natural : Passenger who wants to get aboard? "Noah, stop your ark." Noah probably felt a little indignant, and did not stop. Again he hailed?"Noah, stop your ark." Finally Noah held up, with the answer, "Come, hurry up?the animals are all in except the jackass." Sold.?A verdant-looking Vermouter appeared at the office of a chemist with a large bundle in a yellow bandanna, and opening it, exclaimed : "There, doctor, look at that." "Well," said the doctor, "I see it." "What do you call that, doctor?" "I call it iron pyrites." "What, isn't that gold ?" "No," said the doctor, and putting some over the fire, it evaporated. "Well," said the poor fellow, with a woe-begone look, "there s a widder woman up in our town who has a whole hill of that, and I've been and married her!" tejy.Jedediah Burchard, once preaching a revival sermon, was interrupted by the entrance of Aaron Burr. "Here comes one," says the revivalist, "against whom even I will testify in the day of judgment." "Yes, sir," said Burr, "in fifty years of criminal practice I have always found the greatest rascals turn State's evidence." ffKscdtottcouis |tcadiii0. WHO BURNEI) COLUMBIA? Atchison, Kansas, June 2nd, 1873. To the Editor of the Chicago Tribune: As it ' appears every wrong answer has been given to , the conundrum, "Who fired Columbia?" unless it be the one, "Because it couldn't climb I a tree," I propose to give you a true one. The ! answer is contained in a half dozen words; but, as a quite lengthy explanation wpuld have ! to follow, I'll make the explanation first, and lead up to the answer?keeping, like novelists, ' the interest intensified till the last moment, i An intensely bitter feeling was manifested by our troops from the moment they stepped on | South Carolina soilt In no other seceded I State, (and we had soldiered in all save Texas,) ! was there any particular ill feeling shown toI ward the inhabitants. But, from one end of j the first-named Skate to'the other, it might be I truly said that qur march was marked by "a j cloud of smoke by day and a pillar of fire by I night." | I My recollection is, that outside of the town, not a house was left standing, unless occupied by negroes; and, fron?..the dense clouds of smoke a few miles each to our left and right, plainly defining the march of the columns advancing in parallel lines,-it seemed that the same destruction .was following in the wake of those columns. One instance?I could give twenty?will illustrate and show the animus of the troops: One evening, just at dusk, I had halted within three miles of camp, at a very fine mansion,, where a strong guard bad been posted by our advance. I had command of the rearguard, and, up to this place, had picked up all the sick and all the stragglers. Fearing this house might meet the fate of all others, I sent everything ahead, and relieved the house guard myself,-and kegt with it till we arrived inside our picket line. About midnight, my attention was called to a fire in the direction of that house; and, upon an investigation next morning, there was nothing left to mark the situation of that mansion, save a heap of smouldering ashes. Although the men had marched twenty-seven miles that day, some of them added six more, in order to apply the torch to that house. Their dreams would have been troubled had that building remained as a monument of their oversight or neglect. This remark would often be heard : "Here is where treason began, and, by G?d ! here is where it shall end!" This feeling was intensified as we approached Columbia. My brigade, (Third Brigade, First Division, Fifteenth Array Corps,) composed of the Fourth, Ninth, Twenty-fifth, Thirtieth and Thirty-first A i ', __J _1_: a iowa negiraeoia, nan oiarcneu unu bkuiuisiicu almost incessantly for the two days preceding the capture of that eity. The night we reached the Saluda and Broad Rivers, we pushed over silently in canvas-bottom pontoon boats, two miles above the city, laid on our arms till dawn, and then attacked, carrying everything before us. The Mayor met us near the. city, and made a formal "unconditional surrender." I had refused any other; but, upon his accepting, at once promised protection for all private property. As we entered one of the principal streets, the side-walks were lined with negroes of every age, sex and condition, holding in their arms vessels of every conceivable size and shape, filled with almost every conceivable kind of liquor. Here was an old white-wooled man, who, with a "Lord bress you, massa, try some dis," offered brandy from a gourd that had been filled from the bucket held in his hand. Others were offering wines, champagne, etc., from original packages, tin cups, crocks, &c. Officers were at once reminded that their men, considering their fatigue of the past few days, their sharp fight of the morning, their loss of sleep and food for the past twenty-four hours, were in no condition to drink much liquor. The temptation offered was too great to withstand by all; and, in spite of strenuous efforts of officers, within thirty minutes a no inconsiderable number of ray command were intoxicated. This occurred during ray absence to plant our national colors on the State House, and I returned in great haste, as General Hampton's cavalry had attacked my advance guard, and threatened a charge on the brigade. Harsh measures had to be adopted at once, and those drunk were put under guard, and, so soon as the enemy had been compelled to retire, I at once had the entire brigade distributed through the city. Un to this time, no fires had occurred in any part of the city save those of public buildings and quartermaster's stores, fired by the enemy the day before we entered, I think, but which fire had not extended, and did not extend to any other part of the city. The streets in some places had contained bales of cotton, which had been cut open, and these caught fire twice or three times during the day; but these fires had been promptly put out by some of the firemen of the city, aided by a detail under charge of an officer. By this time, I realized how much too small my command of 2,200 men was to properly guard a city of 40,000 inhabitants, rich almost beyond conception in such stores as we coveted. In addition to their own?more thaii ordinarily found anywhere?Richmond and Charleston had sent for safe keeping all their surplus. I represented to Gen. Woods, commanding the division, how inadequate my command was to the task, particularly as this was the capital of South Carolina. And, while he expressed himself as of ray opinion, he could do nothing further than to refer me to General Logan, commanding the corps. Logan expressed himself even more strongly than Woods had done, that ray command was too small for the provost duty of Columbia, but said that Howard's orders were, one brigade must guard the city, and he could not change them. I now had intimation that the Union officers released by us from the city prisous had formed a society, to which had been added many members from our soldiers and the negroes, and the object of which society was to burn Columbia. Colonel J. D. Palmer, commanding my regiment, the Seventy-fifth Iowa, and to whom I had entrusted the charge of the most dan gerou9 part of the city, viz.: that on the river and in "Cotton Town," confirmed my opinion that there was a plot to burn the city, by telling me that several fires had started in his district; that he had succeeded iu putting them out so far, but could not hold out much longer ; and that iu his opinion, the next one would fire the city. The wind after sunset had increased in violence, and about 9 o'clock, was blowing almost a hurricane from Colonel Palmer's district right toward the heart of the city. All at once, fifteen or twenty Haines, from as many different places along the river, shot up, and in ten minutes the fate of Columbia was settled. Most of the officers, and many of the men, worked like heroes all night in saviug property. Gen. Sherman set the example, and often during the night I uoticed him as j hard at work as any private soldier or firc! man. By the next morning, it was discover: ed the guard had been to small; and though 1 a square mile of the heart of the city had been ; eaten out, and the men's appetite for revenge satiated, yet it was then considered that a division of troops was necessary for provost duty. My command was relieved to go into j camp to rest and recruit, as the entire com| raand was entirely exhausted and worn out. On our march from Columbia, one of the released Union officers, noted above, called on me, and stated, as he had heard rumors that I had fired the city, he wanted me to take his i name and address, and, if necessary, use him, as his testimony would entirely exonerate me from such charges. I Prisoners were always treated well by their captors. "Johnny" and "Yank" vied in sharing with each other his last piece of corn dodger or ration of coffee. It was only when our men got into the hands of home guards that they were maltreated. While it is true that a few noble Southern women visited the I prisons in Columbia, and clandestinely gave 1 our sick soldiers such little delicacies as a cup i of tea, toast, etc., yet it is not loss true that some of the prisoners suffered more than one can write. ! One soldier told me that when in one of the prisons of that city, he had asked a woman for something to eat, as he was starving. For an answer she spat'in his face. ! And now, to return -to the "American In| diau," the true answer to the conundrum is: ' Columbia was fired by an organization^ of Union officers released from the prisons the day of the capture of that city, Union soldiers and negroes. As mpny of my old command will read this, I hope they may drop me a line to say whether I have giveu an impartial statement or not, and to point out any errors I may have matje. GEO. A. STONE, ' Ex Brevet lirii/ailicr General U.S. Vols. Jeff Davis' Fikst Swektheakt.?There is living in Detroit, says and exchange, a ven-! i erable and respected lady, who, to those who { know her, is the heroine of a strange story. , She may be seen almost-any day on the streets, hurrying from her tour of shopping back to her pleasant little home, where, over her needle and thread, her faucies have full play, ' and memory is supreme." She is ft'Svbftian of rare intellect and great cultivation,'a charming conversationalist and au exemplary Chrisj tian. She has beeu twice married, and twice ?-m ?i* i ? *:? j-? <l wiuuw, IIIHI IIU?, oa tunc 10 uiamug uio silver traciug through her hair, she moves ; alone. The loved ones of the past are gone. ; Her interests and affections draw her toward | the world of spirits. She was, in her young I days, the betrothed of Jefferson Davis. Why they never married is not known. She treasures too dearly the casket of the past to open it to other eyes. It may be that to her near and dear ones she tells the story. I am not among them, and do not know it. It is certain, however, whatever may have prevented the consummation of their early plans, she and the Confederate have never lost-their regard for each other. They still exchange letters and watch over each other's welfare. Two "feuch Ifaes running in such jlifferent channels, and" yjt paving the sympathy of heart and interest, must have much to attract each, other. Ilis has been a life of splendid achievements And' ignoble failures?full of excitementand thrilling episodes. Hers, having its own vicissitudes, borne like a woman, has been quiet and unobtrusive, but, perhaps, as wonderful as his. When I pass her on the street, or see her in church, I feel like running to her and asking for her story. I know it .would be interesting. The Sweetheart of Jefferson Davis! uri i j .... i:i.? i?i. yy nu wuuiu jjul jmc tu gu unutv. ui j;iuiuuga for power, and his. struggle in behalf of the Lost Cause, and learn something more of his boyhood, and how he acted when in love? + . Catching a Wife.?The most curious ceremony known to the Esquimaux, says Dr. Hays,.in his lecture, is perhaps, that pf marriage. It is done thus : When a boy kills a polar bear, it isconsiderecLsufficient proof of his ability to maintain a family ; he is, therefore, told to go and catch a wife. Watching his opportunity at times, he pounces upon a victim, and attempts to carry her off; she, however, struggles and shrieks, until she has collected around her a group of sympathizers. She then turns upon her captor, and bites and scratches until he is compelled to release her; she then darts into the crowd, and attempts to escape; he follows but not unmolested. All the old women take scourges of dried seal skin and flagellate him unmercifully as he passes, making at the same time every effort to arrest him in his course. If, despite these little experiments in matrimonial bliss, he should catch his victim, the biting and scratching scene is renewed, and in all probability he is compelled to release her, and the chase, with its attending comforts, is resumed. Should he overcome all obstacles the third capture usually proves effectual,-and the vie? tim, ceasing her struggles, is led away amid the acclamations and rejoicing of the assembled multitude. With us the mother-in-law comes to time with her flagellating apparatus after the intereresting ceremony, whilst the wife reserves her scratching propensities for some occasion when her John Henry comes rollicking home. A Lost Husband.?Under the heading "Strayed or Stolen," Mrs. S. Susan Hundley, of "Sheffey's Farm," Wythe county, advertises her husband, Andrew Jackson Hundley. She says he left her about two months ago, in company with one Manda Wyrick, who, she believes, "conjured or bewildered" him, by L'ivimr him "a cun of coffee to drink, upon the top of which he saw a blue gloss swimming." They were accompanied by her son Bos, who left a wife and three child ren. The deserted matron says: "I want A. J. arrested and handcuffed, if necessary, and brought back to me," dead or alive, as he owes a good many debts that he must pay, arid he ofwes me a support in my old age. He is supposed to have gone to Tennessee or Iowa, or out west. He is a long, iean, lank fellow, about six feet high, broad shoulders, thin beard, light hair and complexion, blue eyes, and about fortyfive years of age, (being about twenty years younger than myself.) She offers to pay anybody a fair-price who will, return him to her "dead or alive," and requests all pnpers in the United States to copy the advertisement one time and forward their bills to her. We give her this one gratis?in fact, feel like paying her for the enjoyment of the fun. 4- 4 A Max who Advertised.?There is a mighty clever man living in Danville, Va., by the name of Ike II. Raines. . All men have their notions about making a fortune, and Ike had his. He set up with a few boxes of candy and opened in a little coop of a shop on Maiu 3treet. There was a big, fine candy and toy shop in the place at the same time, and the people laughed and said?"What does Ike Raines expect to do with that little shop?" Ike never said anything. And about the only men he was ever seen to talk with were some printers in the place. A year-or two passed around, and the big confectionery man put his first advertisement in the paper that he had ever written, and that was to sell out and move away. And Ike had gone into a big store! He's in it now.. He's called the Santa Glaus of Virginia, and all the people of I that region and border Carolina buy their "good things" of him. We asked him?"Ike, ; how did you raakeyoor n&oney ?" "Pshaw!" he said with a laugh, "you know it was with ; printer's ink." Mr. Iiaines is a liberal ad; vertiser, and has reaped the benefits of raak; ing his name and business known.?Milton J (xY. C.) Chronicle. : Consumers of sugars will be pleased j with the prospect of low prices for the coming ! season. The New York Grocer says sugars j will be abundant and cheap. The crops in i all producing countries are large, and as the 1 beet root crop of Europe this year will yield an estimated amount of 1,100,000 tons, an in; crease of 200,000 tons over last year, this will | fully meet the wants of Europe, and by so : much lessen the demaud for cane sugars. The j result will be that a larger amount of raw sugar than usual will seek a market in this country, and consequently keep prices down. ? ? 4 4 | A smooth sea never made a skillful mariner, neither do uninterrupted prosperity and success qualify for usefnlness and-happiness. The storms of adversity, like those of the ; , ocean, rouse the faculties, and excite the in-! vention, prudence, skill and- fortitude of the j voyager. The martyrs of the ancient times, | in bracing their minds to outward calamities, j acquired a loftiness of purpose and moral heroism worth a lifetime of softness and seen- ! ! rit^ And now we have same gtfcd news for the balk-headed. We recently promulgated j the doctrine of a Washington physician that; bald-headed men were short lived. It gives ! us pleasure to state in refutation of that I gloomy theory, that a learned New York M. D. says that bald-headed men are rarely J or never drunkards, and that, moreover, a' bald-headed tnan is seldom found in a lunatic | asylum. fUatlittg fat the JMrfaitJt. CONDUCTED BY REV. ROBERT LATHAN. [Original.] "COME TO ME." Men often organize themselves into societies, and devise signs and adopt words and phrases, by which they recognize each other. Military organizations have their watchwords and countersigns. Amongst Christians, the same thing, in kind, exists. The watchword is "Come." This is the word of invitation, and the word of final approbation. To the sinner, burdened with iniquity, the Saviour says : "Come to me, and I will give you rest." The' teat nf a new heart is COinine' to Jesus. During the whole of our earthly pilgrimage, Jesus says: "Come to me." To the sinner, lost and ruined, he says: "Come to me, and I will pardon your iniquities." To the justified believer he says: "Come tome, and I will, by my word and spirit, sanctify you in soul and body, and prepare you for that everlasting rest which remains for the redeemed in heaven." To his trembling disciples, Jesus says: "Come to me, with all your doubts and fears; I will eulighten your minds and dispel all your fears." To the Christian, during the whole of life's journey, the word of invitation and encouragement is?"Come with me;" and when the last day's march is ended, and the boundary which separates time and eternity reached, Jesus says to the believer : "Come with me, fear no ill; my rod and my staff they will couafbrt you." Life's jodrney'ended, and the affairs of this world settled, and the sleeping millions aroused from the slumbers of the grave, and the whole of Adam's race assembled before the' Judge, seated upon a great white throne, the word of invitation and encouragement becomes a word of approbation. Before an assembled universe, and in the presence of His Father and the Holy Spirit, he will say, to those who have obeyed the invitation, "Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the.foundation of the world." The word of gracious invitation and of glorious approbation is the same. The gracious iuvitation of the sinner into the kingdom of heaven on earth, and the welcome of the saint into the kingdom of heaven on high, is in the same, or nearly the same words. From the beginning of grace to its termination in glory, the watch-word is: "Come with me." [Original.] FAMILY TRAINING. Every age has something about it which characterizes it Some periods of the world's history are marked by contrary and opposing types. This is the case with respect to the nineteenth century, the period in which we live. In no period of the world's history has, so much beeu done to disseminate the gospel of Jesns Christ, as is doing at present. The ordinary means of grace are more generally enjoyed now than ever heretofore. The gospel is preached in almost every neighborhood; in almost every community there is a Sabbath school, and the country is flooded with religious literature in the form of books, periodicals, newspapers and tracts. All this is well enough. We rejoice that such is the case; but the bee has its sting, and the rose its thorn, and the blessings of the present age have their counterpart. One of the most noticeable opposite features of the nineteenth century, is the almost utter neglect, on the part of parents, to train their children for the Lord. This duty and privilege, which, by the ordinance of heaven, is committed to the father and mother, is, in accordance with the defection of the times, transferred to the church. The result is, that the work is either not done at all, or at best but poorly done. Parents, almost universally, have concluded that they are, by the organization of the Sabbath schools, released from the duty of instructing their offspring at home. We have nothing to say against the Sabbath school. It is doing a good work ; but it cannot do the ? i ^ ? i : A . ?Tkn worK mac Lrou nas uaaigueu iu pnicuuj. xuo most important part of our education is received luider the parental roof. The lessons which we there learn are the most important, and which we most easily reduce to practice. Destroy the natural relations be-, tween parent and child, and none of the means of grace will avail anything. The Sabbath school, the college, the theological seminary, and even the preaching of the gospel, will be used in vain for the convicting and converting of sinners, and for the instructing of saints. The base of the social and religious fabric is the relation which naturally exists between parent and child. If the foundation is destroyed, how can the superstructure be reared ? Parents should remember that they are bound to train their children for the Lord. For the eternal destiny of their offspring they are accountable to God. By no process can they shift this responsibility on the church, or the Sabbath school,, or any one or any thine else. Early impressions are the most permanent. To parents is given the privilege of making the earliest of all impressions. God blesses family training as he does nothing else. The rnle is, that properly trained children do well, both for this world and the next. A badly trained or spoiled child generally makes a bad man. The infamy and disgrace which children often bring upon themselves, and the sorrow and shame which they often bring to their parents, are traceable to the neglect of proper training. Of this the world affords many striking illustrations. Parents should remember that more j depends upon them than upon any other class j of individuals. It is the parent, and not the i learned professof, that determines the type of the world's civilization. + ? All For God.?No one claims property in the ocean to the exclusion of others. It is for all nations and people to use for their interests ; nor is there any fear of exhausting its resources, were the whole world of humanity to make draughts upon it. It. rolls its waves against every shore, and sends its tides into every land, as if to invite the inhabitants to her riches and facilities, and as if to show she was the property of all. So with the living God. No man can claim Him to the shutting out of others. He is the God of all; for their knowledge, their love, their obedience, their felicity; and should every intelligent being on the earth draw from his treasury of good to the endless satisfaction of j nature, there would still be an infinite plenitude left. Aud to convince all that he is j their God, he'gives to all life, breath, and all things. He fans them with his influence; draws them by his love; sends hosts of holy | agents to bring them to himself. By ten thousand attractions of love and mercy, he invites the world to plunge in his fullness and be satisfied. - JSfFix the truth in the minds of men by familiar illustration. Hills, fields, flowers, birds, sowers, fisherman, continue to echo the words of Christ. Palestine, as Renan says, is 1 a "fifth gospel, torn, indeed, but still legible." i So, when the multitudes passed to their homes, beyond the sound of the Lord's words, they saw his sermon in acts aud scenes which before seemed meaningless. Mtoflt'is gepattttttnt.[OrlglnaJ.] MATTER. Every child, ten years old, has either used or heard the word "matter" used, aud also has an idea of its meaning. Notwithstanding the fact that the word is so frequently used and so generally understood, it is not very easy to give a definition of matier that is free from all objections. This is often the case. There are some words that everybody understands what they mean; and yet no one can rlpfinp tlipm wifhnnt nstncr a crrpaf. manv words I which, strictly speaking, do not define, but. only describe them. If any one- doubts this, | let him, without a dictionary, attempt to give 1 a good and satisfactory definition of the cop- j ulative conjunction and. Matter may be i defined to be that of which the sensible universe is composed. Anything which is discernible by any one of the five senses, is mat-1 ter. If we can see, bear, taste, smell or feel | anything, it is matter. We know nothing of matter only by its properties. What it is in itself, aside from its properties, we cannot know. We have no means of analyzing the essence of anything. It makes no difference what we undertake to examine, we invariably arrive at a point where our investigation has to stop. Water is matter. It is composed of two invisible gases?oxygen and hydrogen. If asked what water is, we might reply that it is oxygen and hydrogen combined in accordance with a natural law; but if asked what oxygen or hydrogen is, we are obliged to confess that all we know about either is from their properties. Of the essence of either, we know and can know nothing. ' f - The properties of matter are many. ;, "Some of these properties belong alike to all matter. Thus, jt is a property of all matter thatdt occupies space. It is also a property of all matter that it i? impenetrable. That is, no two bodies can occupy the same space at the same time. If you drop a stone into a glass filled with any liquid, a sufficient quantity of the liquid will be displaced to give room for the stone. Whenever a property belongs alike to all matter, this property is called a general property. There are other properties roViinV. Kalnnr* T\?rtis>ll1nr KndipS nf m.lttfir. Sorae bodies are very hard, and others arq very soft. Sorae bodies differ from each othfer in their color. Gold is yellow, and silver is white. The one is called1 the yellow metal, and the other the white metal. Wheneveir-a property belongs to a particular body and not to all bodies, this property is called a specific property. * The properties of matter in general are many. The most important properties are magnitude, shape, divisibility, impenetrability and indestructability. All matter possesses some one or all of these properties. The property of occupying space belongs alike to all matter; hence, we say that all matter has magnitude. All matter may be divided. A grain of musk can be divided into ten thousand invisible portions. In theory there is no limit to the division of matter. We can couceive of a grain >f wheat being divided into ten thousand particles. We can also conceive of each one of these ten thousand particles being divided into ten thousand smaller particles. We can conceive of this process of division being continued indefinitely. It is impqssible to put into practice what we are able to conceive to be possible. This property of being divided is called divisibility. All matter is indestructible. By this is meant, that by no process with which we are acquainted, can matter, or any portion of it, be blotted out of existence. Matter may be changed, and in reality, is constantly undergoing changes; but change is not destruction. There is not a particle more, nor a particle less of matter now, than there was when God finished the work of creation, nearly six t l j tnousana years-ago. The changes which matter undergoes are of two kinds. The one is called a physical change, and the other is called a chemical change. Both of these are constantly taking place in every portion of creation. When a piece of iron ore is taken out of the ground and fashioned into a plow, or a hoe, or any useful instrument, the ore has undergone a physical change. Notwithstanding this change, the peculiar properties of the original ore remain the same. When a bar of iron is fashioned by the mechanic into a gun barrel, or into a scythe blade, or into a watch spring, a physical change has been effected. A chemical change is different from a physical change, in that, while it does not anihilate the matter of which any substance is* composed, it destroys its original properties. The chemical changes produced on matter are sometimes very wonderful. Innocent and inoffensive simples are often so changed as to become deadly poisons; and poisonous or inoffensive simples are so changed, as to form both a luxury and an esssential of life. The oxygen and nitrogen of the air, which we constantly breathe, may be so changed as to form nitric acid. Chlorine is an offensive poison, but when chemically combined with the metal sodium, it forms common salt. We might notice this peculiarity in the nature of things. When we desire to describe matter, we always use an adjective; but when we desire to describe mind, we use a participle. Thus we say of matter, it is hard or soft, light or heavy. When we describe the operations or properties of the mind, we do not say that it is hard or soft, light or heavy; but we say it is a thinking, feeling and willing substance. The properties of matter are discernible by the senses, but the properties of the mind are not. A HINDOO^ STORY. A tiger, prowling in the forest, was attracted by a beautiful calf. It proved to be a bait, and the tiger found himself trapped in a spring cage. There he lay two days, when a Brahmin happened to pass that way. "0, Brahmin!" piteously cried the beast, "have mercy on me ; let me out of this cage." "Ah 1 but you will eat me." "Eat you! devour my benefactor ? Never could I be guilty of such a deed," responded the tiger. The Brahmin being benevolently inclined, was moved by these entreaties and opened the door of the cage. -The tiger walked up to him, wagged his tail, and said, "Brahmin, prepare to die; X^shall now eat you." "0, how ungrateful! how wicked ! am I not your saviour? protested the trembling priest.! "True, said the tiger, "very true ; but it is the custom of my race to eat a man when we get a chance, and I cannot afford to let you ; go. "Let us submit the case to an arbitrator," j said the Brahmin. "Here comes a fox. The ; fox is wise; let us abide by his decision." \ "Very well," replied the tiger. The fox, assuming a judicial aspect, sat on j his haunches with all the dignity he could muster, and looking at the disputants he said: j "Good friends, I am somewhat confused at the different accounts which you give of this ; matter; my mind is not clear enough to render equitable judgment. But if you will be kiud enough to act the whole transaction before my eyes, I shall attain unto a more definite conception of the case. fD6cyou, Mr.! Tiger, show me how you approached" and entered the cage, and then Mr. Brahmin will show me how he liberated you, and I shall be able to render a proper decision." They assented, for the fox was solemn and oracular. The tiger walked into the caj^e, and the spring door fell and shut him in. He was a prisoner. The judicial expression faded from the fox's countenance, and turning to the Brahmin, he said: "I advise you to go home as fast as you can, and abstain, in the future, from doing favors to rascally tigers. Good moaning, Brahmin ; good morning, tiger." Ibe iJatkiUr (?uquim. TEIIM8?IN ADVANCE x One Copy, oneyear, 3 00 One Copy, Six months, y 1 50 One Copy, Three months, 1 00 Single Copy, 10 Two Copies, one year 5 00 TenCopies, " ' i'. 25 00 ^ay-To persons who make up clubs of ten or more names, an extra copy oftiie paper will be furnished oneyear, free of charge. A D VERTISEMENqpS > Will be inserted at One Dollar and Fifty Cents per square for the first, and Seventy-live Cents per square for each subsequent insertion-less than three months. A square consists of the space occupied by ten lines of this size type, or one inch. No advertisement considered less than a square. Soini-Monthlv, Monthly, or Quarterly Advertisements, will boeharged'fwo Dollars per square for each insertion. Quarterly, Semi-Annual or Yearly contracts will be tna'do on liberal terms?the contract, however, must inall cases be conlinedto the immediate business of the firm or individual contracting. Obitnary Notices and Tributes of Respect, rated as advertisements. Announcements of Marriages and Deaths,and noticesofa religiouscharacter,inserted gratis, and solicited. Personal Communications, when admissable; Communications of limited or individual interest, or recommendations of Candidates for offices of honor, profit or trust, will be charged for as advertisements. Foot's QoosoMt Man )A/ Is an original, first-class, Dollar Monthly. It b H O fresh sml uprightly, and will Interest the entire household, Including lover* and maidens, husO bands and wives, parents and children. It sug- p gests the Importance of securing a union of ^ H hearts and purposes In life, before there shall t " bo a nnlon of bands. It believes lliat, while It A 8 Is woman's privilege to purify and coinfort and | H adorn, It should be man's, pleasure to provide ?l for, cherish, and protect. It would have chll- O Odren treated as feeling, thinking and growing 5J creatures?perfectly created,but not full grown. T II Yet In advocating these doctrines, the Msga- |J If zlne does not employ doctrinal sermons?long 8 and dreary disquisitions which do not Interest Q Earn! therefore do not profit the reader. On the n contrary, it would rather preach as though It LJ preached not?an Interesting Btory ,t'or Instance, ? " being made to serve the purpose of a long citeO course by giving the reader something real, In- <X Ltercstlng and profitable to think about. J The worst as well as the best feature of the A ' n Magazine is its price. The Idea of getting a U ~fm really first-class Magazine atone dollar a year, V M seems absurd to most people. Yet It employs A A some of the best contributors In the country? M Jnnlurilno H sir Hmn rfiM. (fa Ipnrllmr pdlfnr 1 {% who receives a salsry of three thousand dol- Jr A** lars, equivalent to about den dollars per day. P Each number contains nearly eight hundred p wm dollars' worth of matter, which costs tho sub- ? A scriber about eight cents. I Hope and Joy?two beautifully tinted crayon , portraits worth Four Dollars?will be mailed d N fireo to every subscriber to tho Magazine at $1?0 Q IT Specimens free. Agents wanted. Addreas 8. SJ E 8. WOOD K CO., Newburgh, N. V. T Hw flUff-mi ui Jor H United Tolee of the Fre?a.-Wood'a U/ magazine la one of the monuments of business " O enterprise which mark the age.?JfrfAocttrf Uoute Q n Journal, Phlla., Fa As Its title promises. It m E? Is devoted to the Instruction and entertainment \J of the family circle,and,hi order to place Itwltb- n m. In the means of readers In moderate clrcum- *F (X stances,ltU furnished ata remarkably low rate S J In proportion to the Interest of Its contents.?if. ?. a r.JYibunt. ,. It Is essentially a home magazine, fl %J and Is Jast the thing that one would most desire Y to place In the hands of his wife and little onea, w H or That a man ofbosinesa would himself take M M up for the employment of a leisure hour.?Pt** 2 O Wilmington. ?. C Were we out of our Q X chair editorial, as a "private citizen," cut off mm P from our exchange list and all that, one of the B E first magazines to which we should subscribe U would be Wood's Household.?ay**"". Hart. " At ford, Ct ....It Is an Intellectual and moral Q a . educator, highly prized by all who become ac- . *L quainlcd with It.?Christian Adroealt. ....If 0 popular writers are, therefore, good writers Y and If h'K11 prlcds prove the merit of literary ?_ 1 wares, then Mr. wood's magazine is a good M H one.?The Jiuiepaulent, New York Its artl- m* X cles breathe a spirit of economy, morality and A U virtue which Is highly refreshing In this age of m P fashionable folly and extravagance.?Sentinel, L Edlna, Mo It Is undoubtedly one of the A B freshest, liveliest Journals we have examined. Z5 Jb ?JUcofd, Springfield, Teun. ....The articles A T" arc short, piquant, and of such unquestioned J excellence, that this periodical ought to he both O familiar and welcome in verv many households. Wood's Is a marvel or cheapness and Y first-lass quality combined.?New York Tima. B Mi ftaMilam DOORS, SASH AND BLINDS, i MOULDINGS, Brackets, stair Fix- I tures, builders'Furnishing Hard- j ware, Drain Pipe, Floor Tiles, Wire Guards, Terra Ootta Ware, Marble and j j Slate Mantle Pieces, j WINDOW GLASS A SPECIALTY, j i Circulars and Price Lists sent free on application, P. P. TOALE, i 20 Hayne and 33 Pinckney streets, j Charleston, S. C. 1 Orders received by my Agents, ! Messrs. JEFFERYS?fe METTS.atthe 1 Citizen's Savings Bank,Yorkville.S.C. | , $?* White Pine Lumber for Sale. Octobers 40 ly ROSE'S HOTEL, (FORMERLY HUNT'S HOTEL.) COLUMBIA, S. C. THIS HOUSE is in the centre of the city, convenient to all the Public Offices and Business Houses, located on the south-west corner of the State House Square, has been recently re-opened and renovated, and will now compare favorably with any Hotel at the South. ROSE'S OMNIBUS will convey passengers to and from every train, free of charge. Also, a first-class Carriage for the accommoda4.1? ~e \?Ai null ui lauicni TRANSIENT BOARD $2.50 per day. W. E. ROSE, Proprietor. Septembers 37 tf CHABLOTTE, COL. AND AUGUSTA B. E. SUPERINTENDENT'S OFFICE, 1 Columbia, S. C., Juno 13,1873. j THE following Passenger Schedule will be run over this road on ana after MONDAY, 16th instant: aOINQ south. Train No. 1. Train No. 2. Leave Charlotte, 4.20 A. M. Arrive at Columbia,...9.30 A. M. Leave Columbia 9.45 A. M. 3.15 A. M. Arrive at Augusta,.....2.00 P. M. 8.20 A. M. qoino nortn. Leave Augusta.... 3.52 A. M. 5.50 P. M. Arrive at Columbia,...8.27 A. M. - 10.47 P. M. Leave Columbia 8.42 A. M. Arrive at Charlotte.... 2.00 P. M Standard time ten minutes slower than Washington ; six minutes ahead of Columbia. No. 1 Train daily. No. 2 Train daily, Sundays oxcepted. Both trains make close connection to all points North, South and West. Through tickets sold and baggage checked to all principal points. JAMES ANDERSON, General Sup't. E. B. Dousey, Gen. Freight and Ticket Agent. June 19 25 tf Miff iMun iirm MEMl'HIH, TENN. Branch Oilice, - Baltimore, Maryland. ASSETS, $1,100,000. Hon. JEFFERSON DAVIS, President. Gen. WADE HAMPTON, Pros. Baltimore Board. J. D. KENNEDY, State Agent. W. B. SADLER, Yorkville, Special Agent June 27 . 26 ly A cronfa may loam something greatly to their advantage and obtain spocimens and full particulars free, byaddroasing WOOD'S LITERARY AND ART AGENCY5, Newburgh, N. Y. WRAPPING PAPERT A LOT of TIDDY'S large-sized WRAPPING PAPER on hand and for sale, by ' W. L. GRIST, Agent. ' June 12 'zi 2t STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA, COUNTY OF 0HE8TER?COUNT OF OOMKON PLEAS, J. C. H. Clausen and Win. Ufferhardt as Executors of the last Will and Testament of John Campsen, deceased, Plaintiffs, against Win. R. Robertson, Theodore D. Kline and James Doig, Defendants.?Sttmnwiui for Relief. To the Defendants, Wm. R. Robertson, Theodore D. Kline and James Dolg: TOU are hereby summoned and required to answer the complaint in this action, which is flled in the office of the Clerk of the Court of Common Pleas for the said coutlty, and to serve a copy of your answer to the said complaint on the subscribers at their office, in the town of Chester, S. Carolina, within twenty days after the service hereof, exclusiye of the dgy of service ; And if you fail'to answer the complaint wi'thin the time aforesaid, the plaintiffs in this action will apply to the Court for the relief demanded in the complaint. Dated June 13th, 1873. McLURE A McLURE, Plaintiffs' Attorneys. TO THE DEFENDANTS?Wiiliam R. Robertson, Theodore D. Kline and James Doig: You will take notice that a summons in this action, of which the foregoing is a truecopy, was hied in the office of the Clerk of Baid county, at Chester Court House, in the county and Stgte aforesaid, on the 13th day of June, A. D. 1873, and that ifyou fail to answer, as required In the said summons, the Plaintiffs will apply to the Court for the relief demanded in the complaint. McLURE A McLURE, Plaintiffs' Attorneys. June 19 25 6t ' Dr. Crook's. Wine of Tar. % 10 YEARS JIB: ?OF A? t PUBLIC TEST Dr. Crook's WINE To Iihv? more merit tliaii any similar prcparation ever ottered the public. Tt in rich in the medicinal qualities of Tar. anihineqiialeil for diseases of the Throat and Lungs, i?rformip.K the most remarkable aires. Conglis, Colds. Chonic Coughs. It effectually aires them all. Asthma and Bronchtis. ' Hns cwreO *o "ninny crows it has been: pronounced n specific for these complnintR. For pains in Breast, Side or Back, Gravel or Jiidiiey Disease, Diseases of the Urinary Organs, Jaundice or any Liv<?r Complaint, \Jt has no equal. It is also a superior Topic, Restores the Appetite, Strengthens the System, Restores the Weak and Debilitated, Causes the Food to Digest, Removes Dyspepsia Indigestion^ Prevents Malarious Fevers, " N hes tone to your System. Try Dr.Crook's Wine of Tar A/ifrvhfl* <1 J/) ? ,.lV THE HOME SHUTTLE SEWING MACHINE. THE best Cheap Machine in the Market. Ifthe number sold is a criterion of merit, it is the BEST MACHINE in use, as there have been more HOME SHUTTLE M ACHINESsold in the State during the last twelve months than all other Sewing Machines combined. You can buy a HOME SHUTTLE MACHINE for about half the money you will have to pay for a first-class Machine, "so-called." W. L. GRIST, Agent. GEO. S. HACKERr DOOR.SMSBSwtory, CHARLESTON, S. C. fTlHISisaslargeand complete a factory as there X is in the South. All work manufactured at the Factory in this city. Tko only house owned and managed by a Carolinian in this line in Charleston. Send for price< list. Address, GEO. S, HACKER, Post-Office box 170, Charleston, S. C. Factory and Ware rooms on King street, opposite Cannon street, on lino of City'Rail way. December 5 49 ly THE MORNING STAR. tiAILY EDITION: j THOUGH oniy five years old, has the largest Dally Circulation of any newspaper in the State< and a circulation in Wilmington fifty per cent, larger than that of any other paper. WREKLY EDITION: Now combined with the CAROLINA FARMER, making one of the best Family Newspapers in the South. Circulation very large and rapidly increasing. SUBSCRIPTION PRICE: Daily Star, 1 year, ...97 00 M " 6 months,.....'. 3 50 44 44 3 months, 2 00 Weekly Star, 1 year, 2 00 44 r 44 6 months, a 1 00 44 4* 3 months, 50 It may be-safely asserted that no newspaper ever established in North Carolina has made such rapid progress as THE MORNING STAR. $31* Sena for Specimen copies. Address,. . WM. H. BERNARD, KING'S MOUNTAIN R. ROAD. DAILY TRAIN. HEREAFTER the trains over the KING'S MOUNTAIN RAIL ROAD will run daily, (Sundays excepted) as follows, making close connection with trains on the Charlotte, Columbia and Augusta Railroad: Leave Yorkville, promptly, at 4 o'clock, A. M. Arrive at Chester at 0 o'clock, A. M. Leave Chester at 2 o'clock, P. M. Arrive at Yorkville at 4 o'clock, P. M. All* Freights must be delivered at the Depot by 4 o'clock, P. M., on the evenings previous to the departure of the train. GEORGE W. MELTON, President. \ ^ TflLPAKKEKGUN. PARKER BRtfS WEST MERIDEN.CT. tfi r Tr| <#(5>r| PER day! Agents wanted ! tp P 1 fp^CVj All classes of working people of either sex, young or old, make more money at work for us in their spare moments, or all the time, than at anything else. Particulars free. Address G. Stinson <? Co., Portland, Maine. October 3 40 ly OUEPARTHERSHIP WITH "OLD SOI" STILL continues, and wo are prepared, better than ever, to execute PHOTOGRAPHIC PICTURES of every stylo, at our gallery in the "Adickes' Building." A lot of nice ALBUMS always on lmud. Also Stereoscopes and Views. J. R. SCHORB A SON.