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DETD TO POLITIE MORALITY UCATION AND T ENEAL INTT OF TH -D Fe BRADLEY &00.- . PICKENS. S. C., THURSDAY,_DECEMBER 8 D, 1881 TUriUM OF THE DAY. FRANon is to resume eating American pork. GuiTEAU's trial has boon properly termed a " circus." KArir-oon has tried lecturing in Oregon and made a total failure of it. Tin London brewer, Sir Dudley Ooutts Majoribanks, has been created a Lord. "THE Lord protects Guiteau," but still Guiteau feels safer when accom panied by mounted police. THM endowment fund of the Astor Library, given by the members of the Astor family, amounts to $1,125,130. LEAvinLE now has a population of 20,000 people, and last year that district yielded ore to the value of $15,000,000. HOWARD OARnOLL, staff correspondent of the New York Timnes, has been named as the probable Private Secretary of the President. A Missouni doctor has been convicted of vaccinating people with Now Or leans molasses. He was sweet ot 'em, wasn't he? GEonGE LAW, the millioliaire who died in New York a few days ago, was a typical American, having bogun life as a hod-carrier. TEm wife and daughter of Henry A. Smith, one of the princely thieves of the Tweed gang, now keep an apple stand for a living. ALL the bullets miss Guiteau, some how or other. Is there not one crack marksman in America, or must we im port the English rifle team ? GurrEAU expects to draw on the ros trum when his trial is over. He will, particularly if there is a trap door under him and the knot is properly tied. THE New York Alderman gets a sal. ary of $2,000 a year, and has a hard timo getting along, whereas the Chicago Al. derman gets no salary and leads the fash ions. A. j. TEm saddest wails from Ireland are the Nasby's letters. Nasby's sympath ies have been deeply stirred since he left the " X Roads, wichls in the Stato Uv Kaintuck." Tim idea of the National Temperance Society now is to havo the United States Constitution so amended as to prohibit a the manufacture, importation and sale of alcoholic beverages. Tim mnan who steals enough to employ expensive lawyers is a defaul ter, but he rhose stealings will not admit of this uxury, is a thief, and a very common one, at thats. That's the difference. THnJU million dollars is the amount A. Theodore Hauel, the defaulting tax clerk of Philadelphia, says has been stolen from that city by an organized gang of thieving clerks. Theodore confesses to $50,000 of it. W~'rvyjn the mierchante of Atlanta have expended in aid of the Inter national Cotton Exposition will be as bread cast upon the waters. 'It will re turn to them in future with a hundred fold added. GUrrEAU persistently insists that Arthur owes his present high position to his act, and demands recognition in re turn. " Only for me," says Guitean: boastingly, " Arthur would be a polit i cal oypjier." SHURLBur, Minister to Peru, and Kil patrick, Minister to Chili, are to be re oalled. It seems they have disgraced themselves somewhat by a personal quarrel respocting the claims of thiose countries. GrorrzAn says he never struck any body in his life. 'Twas well. But he should be afforded an opportunity now. SHow terrible would he feel were he penned up in a ring with a prize fightev. He is an awful coward. A NoTOaROUS Chicago burglar under arrest says that burglars never receive more than five per cent. of the capital invested and chp~nces taken. Poor fel lows ; they have a hard time of it, and are apt to get killed at any moment, too. ,A. Pmn- Gsrz, of Lancaster, Ohio, who had two bullete shot into his brain by Herman Peter, lived twenty-four honrs after the~ tragedy occurred. Both bul. 1ets entered the brain to some distance anid were only an inch apart. "Mvrou laughter,'' and "con tinued applause " are characteristic features of Guitean's trial in the Criminal Court at 'Washington. This sounds very much as though the bitter feeling toward the assassin was being ameliorated. PRESIDENT GARFIELD'S meootory is to be honored in London by the founding Nf a Home for Workiw Qirls, to be called " Garfield's Home." A lady has given $1,250 to a committee for the pur pose. LN NEw YoRK.all first-class butchor shops have branch shops in localities of the poor where meats that cannot bo sold to well-to-do families, or that, from long keeping, are not salable, are sold at an inferior price. TEN years ago the invention of the Keeley motor was heralded over the land as one of the wonders of the age, and it is n'ow one of the wonders of the public why its success is so long materializing. Meantime, Mr. Keeley is as confident as ever. HEssY HELFMANN, the Nihilist con spirator in the Czar's murder, who is in confinement at St. Petersburg, has been delivered of a daughter. Hessy has made a confession implicating sixty-two persons in the murder of the Czar, and will probably receive a free pardon. PRESIDENT ARTHUR has "made up his mind " that all officials now in ofliec shall serve their time unless they fail to perfori their duties properly. That is as kindly a recognition of General Gar field's administration as any. one conld ask. VnsNon predicted, long in adv mnce, that the nuthlle of November would be unnii1ually warm and that towards tihe Lat ter part of the month there would be a severo cold spell. He guessed pretty well that time, but the worAt of us will hit it occasionally. THEi': Maine farners have found a rei edy for " off," or non-bearing years of albplo trOs. It's caterpillars. Sinct, li hy devasted the orchards a few years since the trees have borno annually without discrimination. The crop this year is splendid in both quantity and quality. TriE " Regulators" and "Moderators" of Elliott County, Kentucky, fLive formed a treaty by which the " Regu lators" agree to disband their organiza tion. The "Moderators" were headed by the Sheriff of the County. The treaty "fills along-felt want." THE St. Louis rlobe-Democrat sug gests that the bank of England furnish the world. with a list of its denosits. Tf claims that many would escape being swindled by the prevalent practice of al leging that large sums are awaiting claimants and obtaining money from them to seure the alleged inheritances. DELEoATE CANNON does not hold U certiflcate of election from the Secretary ..f the State of Utah. What ho does hold is a certified copy of the election returns. His prospect of rep~resenting Utah is growing beautifully less, and the Mormons may just as well commence getting mad now. EM[oRANT labor is no longer in demand in New York, but emigranta keep com ing just the same. It would be a good idea for the South to put in her best licks to secmre this migrating popula tion during the winter months. This is the time of year. She can show off her climate to adlvanitage. THEBE seems to be plenty of testi mony going to show that Guiteau, all his life, has atcted1 the part of a erank, al though he has never been considered looking in intellect. But if being a erank is to he a murderer, than .the sooner the crank is turned heaven ward, the better.* THE Cincinnati Coemmenrcial p)ointedly remarks :"Guiiteau finids self-control impossible in the presence of the jury. But he was the very embodiment of coolness, calculation, and silence when he wans carrying around the pistol to kill the President. Hie even took the deep precaution to wrap the pistol up to pro tect it from the moisture of the body. Few assassius have been sane enough to keep their powder as dry as that." A OOor3ufonAnY says that were we to see the girls of Ashantee we would not blame the Kinkg for killing two hundred of them to get their blood to mix mortar with. Thus there seems to be a differ ence of opinion even respecting the justice of murdering young girls. .But if we knew where "his shanty " was~ and a crucifying expedition haprpued to be going that way, we should be tempted to join it. DEsrrrz the terrible force of the shoek of the electric eel-a ower equal to fif teen Leyden jars-it lpreyed upon by a little parasite fish, some two or three inches in length, which appears utterly oblivious of the shock. OF Two women, choose the one that will have you. LOST AT SEA. MV DOUR BAnTwIOK THOUra. I stood where the starlit heavens Spread away over sea and glen, Like the hands of loving angels Reaching down to the hearts of men. And the sea, with a smile, reflected The infinite lights above; The quivering, resplendent heaven All smiling with peaceful love. And the waves o'er the white sand crueping Brought ripples of joyous glee, As the lines of the purple heaven Bent over to kiss the sea. "Oh treacherous Pea I" I murmured, "nestore to my arms, I pray, The treasure I gave to your keeping * One golden autumn day." A ship with its preciouis burden Sailed out from my longing gaze, Away Irom tb peaceful harbor In the bright October haze. And a sweet face, looking backward, With a tear and a smile for me The dearest of all my treasures I gave to the treacherous sea. Lake Michigan, darkly hidden In thy tsecret bosom lien The face that I fotidly cherIshed, The beautiful :ovo-lit eyes. For the ship that left the harbor In the calm October haze Bore its precious froight f-rever Away from my longing gaze. THE PHENOMENA OF DEATH, It is our purpose to discuss, as briefly as possible, some of the most important aspects of dissolution. Addison said that there was nothing in history more imposing than, nothing so pleasing and affecting as, the accounts of the behavior of eminent persons in their dying hours; and Montaigne remarks, whi e speculat ing on death, that, of all the passages in the annals of mankind, those which attracted iand delighted him most were the words and gestures of dying men. " If I were a maker of books," ho con tinues, "I would compilo a register with comments of various deaths, for he who should teach men to die would teach them to live." There are three elements presented in this fear of death: First, the extinction of life's pleasures, inter ests and hopes, to which the mind looks forward with a degree of apprehension proportionate to the amount of happi ness they are capable of affording. With the young and vigorous the loss of these animal enjoyments is conteoplat ed with extreme misery ; hence tho cus tom among the early Greeks of bearing the lifeless body of youth to the funeral pyre at the break of morn "lest the sun should behold So sad a sight as the young dead." Second, the dread of the unknown future, also de pending upon the nervous temperament. And lastly comes a fear more powerful than either, which is the dread of pain, inherent in nature. From time imme. morial the actual moment of dissolution has been supposed to be accompanied by a throe of anguish, known as the " death agony." This is believed to occur at that moment when the spiritual and physical forces that have been so in timately blended for many years are torn asunder-the one to molder and decay, the other to take upon itself that new life beyond the ken of man. This last element properly belongs to the physiologist, and as such we propose to consider it. Sir Francis Bacon, in one of his essays, published for the first time in the year 1577, gave to the world the following profound thought: " It is as natural to die as to be born ; and to the little infant, perhaps, the one is as painful as the other." In profundity of thought and depth of research Bacon stepped in advance of his contempora ries, and lived in the future. Thus we find that, contrary to the generally re ceived opinion of even this latter day namure evidently designed that the end of man should be as painless as his be ganig. At birth the babe undergoes an or deal that, were he conscious, would be more trying than a most painful death. Yet he feels it not. Born in an uncon scious state, the brain incapable of re ceiving conscious impressions, his en trance into this hitherto unknown world is accomplished during a state of ob livion, known as nature's ansasthesia : Painless we come, whence we know not Painless wo go, whither we know not! From the earliest period of human history death has been considered as necessarily accompanied by pain : so generat is this belief that he terms "death agony," " last struggle," " pangs of des eh," etc., have been in almost universal use in every age and under all cor'ditions of society. Nothing could be more erroneous ; the truth is, pain and death seldom go together--we mean the last moments of life. Of course, death may be preceded by weeks and even months or extreme suffering, as occurs during certain in curable diseases. So exaggerated has been this notion that it has been considered an act of humanity to anticipate the "death struggle"' by violence ; for ages it 'waL customary among the lower classes ol Europe to hasten' death by suddenly jerking the pillow from beneath the head of the dying, thus throwing the head bankwar i, straining the pharyngeal and thoracic muscles, rendering the respira tion, already difficult, shortly impossi ble. A Venetian Ambassador, in the time of Queen Mary, asserted that it was a common custom among the coun try people to srhother the dying by means of a pillow placed over the face, upon which leaned or sat the nearesi relative. This was foun'led upon the pious belief that the short road was the best one. This custom was handed down from generation to generation, parents performting it for their childreti and vice versa. But perhaps the sad dest privilege ever allowed the friends ol a dying man occurred occasionally dur. ing the reign of Queen Elizabeth. wher through executive clemency--executions del by hangig-they were permitted to oC grasp the feet of the suspended criminal son and, by clenching to the extremities, tio: precipitate their additional weight on glo the body, thereby hastening strangula- obj tion. It is needless to say that these wit theories are false in both conception t and practice. Death is a physiological the process, and, like all other animal fune- Ion tions, should be painlesa. J When the flat of death went forth, na- wh ture kindly provided an ansethetic for fan the body. As the end of life draws near, gat the respiration becomes slow and shal- per low, interrupted now and then by a my deep, sighing inspiration, as though the ' lungs were vainly endeavoring to throw the o bthe palsy slowly creeping over them, the tin the intervals between the inspira- the tions grow longer the blood becomes . t saturated with carbonic-acid -the Lri same which is formed from burnig I charcoal, whose deadly fumes have so often aided the suicide painlessly to de stroy life.l8 While the power of breathing is grad- has ually failing, the heart, which is in close and sympathy .with the lungs, begins to fab contract with less force, propelling the nst blood only a short distance through its tiol arterial channels, thus causing the ex- ima tremities to grow cold, the . The blood sent to the brain is not only visi diminished in quantity, but it is laden mi with carbonic-acid gas, which, actin on U the nerve centers produces a gradual ind benumbing of fte cerebral gaonglia, pat thereby destroying both consmousnoss 0li1 and sensation. The patient gradually the sinks into a deep stupor, the lips become "M purple, the face cold and livid, cold per- wh spiration (death damp) collects on the ass forehead, a film creeps over the cornea, are and, with or without convulsions, the str< dying man sinks into his last sleep. As -f t the power of receivMg conscious impres- Ti sions is gone, the death struggle must be automatic. Even in those cases fcn where the senses are retained to the last, the mind is usually calm and collected, and the body free from pain. " If I had strength to hold a pen, I would write how easy and delightful it as is to die 1" were the last words of the fro celebrated surgeon, William Hunter; ro and Louis XIV. is recorded as saying rin with his last breath : "I thought dying r had been more difficult." " * That the ptinlessness of death is due to some benumbing influence actin on old the sensory nerves may be inferred from r the fact that untoward external sur- rel rounangs rarely trouble the ymng. wa On the day that Lord Collingwood C14 breathed his last the Mediterranean was cal tumultuous; those elements which had tar been the scene of his paat glories rose zol and fell in swelling undulations, and seemed as if rocking him asleep. Capt. sh Thomas ventured to ask if he was dis- th< turned ny tne tossing or the ship. "No, P' Thomas " he answered, "I am in a state F that noting can disturb me more-I am dying; and I am sure it must be con- Im solatory to you and all who love me to le see how comfortably I am coming to my ho end." In the Quarterly Review tljere is related an instance of a criminal who escaped death from hanging by them breaking of the rope. Henr IV, of m o France, sent his physician to examine w him, who reported that after a moment's lu" suffering the man saw an appearance t( like fire, across which appeared a beau- o tiful avenue of trees, Wen a pardon o was mentioned the prisoner coolly re plied that it was not worth asking for. Thoise who have been near death from em drowning,.and afterward restored to con- and sciousness, assert that the dying suffer to' but little pain. (Jap&, Marryatt states ledt that is sensations at one time, when nearly drowned, were rather pleasant a than otherwise. " The fi ut struggle and for life once over, the wter closing exc around me assumed the appearance of cro waving gr'een fields. * * * It is not Imj a feeling of pain, but seems like sinking co down, overpowered by sleep, in t~he of ] lon g, soft ,grass of the cool meadow.". utis N ow, this is precisely the condition y presented in death from disease. In- Ma sensibility soon comes on, the mind loses consciousness of external objects, and de(ath rap~idly and placidly ensues from asphyxia. lo In spite of the natural antagonism to death, a moment's reflection will show o that it is as rimch a physiological pro- a cess as life ; the two terms are correla- car tive, the dlegree of vital activity depend- car ihg on the extent of molecular death oc- ant curring at the same time. Strange as an the patradbox may seem, without death ( we cannot live; every thought emanat ing from the brain, every blow struck cul by the arm, is accompanied by destruc tion of nervous or mzusedular tissue. Th bl bioplasmnatic or living matter which en- c ters into the formation oi . every' animal ma tissue is constantly germinating into cells (tl.e origin of all life), and as con- pj stantly paising into decay, their places the being taken ny other protopiasts, thus keeping up the " active dance of life." g 'This disassimilation, or interstitial death, occurs to such an extent that na- th ture, in her wisdom, has provided excre men tory organs for the purpose of re -a moving from the system the effete mateorial thus produced. Every living A struicture, Wfer passing through ciertain up stages of developmnent, miatuty and, big finally, retr7gression, must come to an than end. This may be but the ephemeral eig Iexistence of some of the lower forms of ThI fungi which, born in the cool of the sen miorninig, die na the sun goes down ; or, ed like the famous dragon-tree of Teneriffe, cor> may outlast the pyramids that keep utta watch by the Nile. The last topic for consideration is the pseudopia of death, or visions of the thr< dying. This subject, coming under the of I realm of mental science, properly be- tael longs to metaphysics rather than phys- hea iology. Various theories have been wom advanced to explain these phenomena. sto< bmt they must remain as hypotheses at the I bet to heare- not susceptible of of nonstration. it is not an uncommon urrence for the dying, after livin ae hours in a semi-conscious condi. 2, to start up suddenly, and, witl wing face, point eagerly to somE eat invisible to the bystanders, and, h animated voice and gesture, state t they behold the glories of heaven oi familiar countenance of some frienc gsince dead. .e question naturally arises as tc Ather these conditions are merely the tasies of a disordered and fast-disor izing brain, or are the dying actually mitted a momentary view of those steries hitherto unknown. 'he traditions and superstitions of past have led to a popular belief in ratter theory. Shakspeare expressed sentiment of his day when he placed he mouth of the dying Queen Kath ke these words : law you not even now a blessed troop [nvite me to a banquet; those bright faces last thousand beams upon me lke the sun ? cience, with its iconoclastic hand, swept away these pleasing fancies in their places has constructed a ric founded on analogy. In the an hesia induced by chloroform a condi t is produced closely resembling that aediately preceding death (caused by carbonic-acid poisoning) in 'which ons are constantly presented to the id, the character of which depends in the natural temperament of the ividual. Thus it often occurs that a ient, when under the influence of roforia, has beatific visions similar to s( of the dying. It is my iortune to ,e at present a patient who invariably 3n under the influence of chloroform arts that she sees angels hovering und her bed. The impression is so mg that she becomes much annoyed be reality of these visions is disputed. 3 asphyxia produced by burning char his ofttimes accompanied by disturbed cies similar to those preceding death. Is Gernhany an Empire? n the first place, the Gerian ternm eich " does not designate an empird a form of government distinguished mi a kingdom, for instance, or a ublic. Strictly taken, it inems aalm," or even "commonwealth, ' ilo the technical term for empire is Liserreich." Thus the Roman Em a might be called a Reich, as was fi German Empire, because, for one son, the hereditary principle in botli i weak, or did not exist ; and in thli sent confederation, or Reich, the so. led imperial dignity, though heredi y in the Royal House of Prussia, iu hereditary in the House of H(Ahen lern aa such. If the Hoherzollkrm m1ld ever cease to be Kings of Prussiv y would cease ipso facto to be Em. ors of Germany. Bat the Napoleonic pire in France was always (.,lied iii rman the " Keiserrich, ")e eaue he perial principle, whatever that, maiy was visibly incorporated in the pub law of the State. The same obs. rva i hld true of the hea-l of the Stitt ~ermany. The press and the public other countries speak of him comn rily .as, the Emperor of Germany, chi is incorrect. There is no suc'h sonage. The Federal Constitut ion ply declares that the Presidency of Confederation is vested ini the King Prussiai, who all bear the title (oF 'man Emperor. Our usage of Ian go and our habits of political thought not, indeed, make any clear differ e between the title German Emperor the title Emperor of Germany ; but l'eutonic-nay, to Con tinen tal --dia-. icians the distinction is of vast im tance. The King of Prussia is thoui -ely President of the German reabur., there is nothing Imperial about hinm 'pt his title, There is no Imind~'i 'en.; no Imperial privy purse ; no >erial civil list; no Imperial suite, or r't or palace. He is simp~ly the King 3russia, mntrusted with certain exec e functions in the German federal em. --Prof. Hecrbert, in Harpe r's r"azine. Japan's National Flower : 'he cherry blossom iB the national rer of Japan, as the rose is of (land, the lily of France, the thistle Scotland, and the shamrock of Ire 1. On the Mikado's flags, pages and -iages, and on the soldiers caps and !orms, you will see the open chrys biemum. But the flower of the ieo.. and the nation is the flower of the isoming cherry tree. The Japanese tivate all over Japan tihe sakura tree, chi is valued only for the beauty of its usoms. From anl entire tree you la not get ripe cherries enough to to a pie; but the blossoms are massed sther on the bo'ughs like clouds, and blo( -ne are often as large as a rose. nics i Japan are called "going to see flowers." In June millions of people nut to sing and sport and laugh and1( y under the cherry trees, or to catch 1e snow showers that do not fall from skies." Some of the peop~le become enchanted with the lovely blossoms o even worship the famous old I s, MISERABIE shoemaker was brought before a Western court charged with amy. It transpired in the evidence t6 the knight of the last had malrried1 it wives, all of whom are hiving. 3 Judge, who is an esthete, b~esidu ding the man up for trial, ccaknenit severely upon the case, de<.laring the duct of the offender to be "too ally Utah l"-S'omerville Journ al. TIrEN old Mrs. Bunsby hand got mugh reading in the paper an account he last great fire she raised her spec es from her eyes to the top of her ci and remarked: "If the fireman uld wear tile genuine home -kuit ~kings, such as we make and wear iln country, they wouldn't be a-bustin' their hoes at every fir. " HUMORM OF THE DAY. IT is the clean table-cloth that catches the terly grease spot. A m1NEn is always a lucky man be cause he can always take his pick. REBECCA: Yes, blind men may be per fectly sane, although you do believe in the saying, " Out of sight out of mind." WE SHOULD think scarf pins would gt sea-sick. They are so often on the bosoms of such heavy swells.-edar Rapids Stylus. "I TAE my tox dis mornin'," said a colored preachier, " from dat po'tion ob de Scripture whar do Postol Paul pints his pistol to de Fesions." " GEOj'oE," she said, "hand me the maynoo." " The which, ma?" " The mnaynoo, dear." "The what?" "Oh you stupid, give me the bill of fare, and e quiet I" AN EXCHANGE states that a clerk in a government office at Washington was injured by au accidental discharge of hi- duties. It will not occur again. Peck's Sun. "Now, Sammy, have you read the story of Joseph ?" " Oh, yes, uncle." " Well, then, wh)at wrong did they do when they sold their brother ?" "They sold him too cheap." A SuORT metre wedding.-A young clergyman in Iowa recently married a couple in the following brief manner: " Do you want one another ?" Both re plied yes. "Well, then, have one an other." "HTENRYt CLAY OLEsON :" Your poem Cntitled, " An Olo to a Cucumber," is accepted. We will work it in on the pub lik in the form of newspaper wrappers, or soll it to lay undor carpets. -Laramie Boomerang. AN OLD proverb says: "If you throw a pound of bread to the poor the Lord will throw a pound of butter into your lap." This may be true. We shan't risk trying it, any way. It would be ex tremely disagreeable to have a pound of butter chucked into our lap.-Bo8ton Post. "I'LL arrest you if you don't keep quiet," said a policeman to a Little Rock man. " I'll bet you $100 you ,lcn't" Tho policeman nabbed him and took him to the lockup. " Always the way," he said, as the policeman locked the door ; "1 never won a bot in my life." Foan OF hABIT.-"Why are you aite ?" naked im Austin school teacher of a little girl,who liui)g her head and said: We have a little baby at our house." " Don't let it happen again," said the ttacher, fiercelv, and tho little girl said she would not, and took her deat.--Texaa Sifliinqs. "1 Do you observo that woman ?" said a gentleman to his companion, as a sharp-featured female swept hau litily by them. The friend nodded to indicate that lie had observed her. "1 Wbll, I'm illebted to her for the chief happiness of my life." "Indled; I can imagine theO gratitude you must feel toward her." "No, you can't ; only her pirosent hus hand can do that. Ten years ago I asked he~r hand in marriage and she refused me.' --Brookly n Eagle.. UNCLE JOE's REFLEoTION.-De stars i.s jes as bright as doy was befo' de war. Sonme folks would burrer a dung-hole ef dey could. D)ar's some1 thing dat will do 1o swop) orf ini the dark. A smart dlorg rudder take do back track oh a grown b'ar. A dorg wid a block on don 't drag on his sitiwation. Olds Satun loads his cannons wid big watermiillons. De debbul ain't got no portickler objection to Chrismus. Heap o' pentenchery hands kin sing hymns firs-rate. You may pr&y for rain, but you better try do hoe on the crab-grass. A punkin vine ain't gwine to ax your 'vice bout what road it trabble.--New Orleans Times. The Condensed Trowsers. An editor in Chicago had ordered a pair of new trowsers from the tailor. On trying them on they proved to be two or three inches too long. It being late on Saturday iighlt, the tailor's shop was closed, and the editor took the -trowsers to his wife and asked her to cut them off and hem them over. The good lady, whiose encumbers or melons had perhaps disagreed with her brusquely refused. The same result followed an application to his wife's sister and the eldest daugh ter. But before b~edtimne the wife relent inghtoo the pants and cutting off six inhsfrom the legs, hemmed them nic'ely and restored them to the closet. Half an hour later the daughter~ taken with compunction for her unfilial con duet, took the trowsers, and cutting off six ines from the legs, hemmed and replaced them. Finally the sister-in law felt the pangs of conscience, and shle, too, performed an additional surgi cal opearation on the garment. When the editor appeared at the breakfast Sunday, tile family thought a highlanA chieftain hal arrived, for the trowsers reached only to the middle of his thigh. hiumor and Happiness. All pure, sweet laughlter is a sign of happiness, and happy people are much miore ap1t to be virtuous than the unhap.. py. lBo good and you will be happy is harly a more valid saying than be hap py and you will be good. In the matter of thought and character, it has many times been observed by the most careful stude~lnts of the mind that the lack of hut mor involves a very serious intelleotu&J defect, a lack of nice discrimination. Tmi water of the Hudson river at Poughkeepsie has been pronounced un fit for drinking purposes, but the people pyno more attention to this fact than df it was announced that it was unht for firewood.