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' "'" :" ' " " ~ " """ ' --' -' --'? ' 1 J-'l-J._ _ . . J _" . } ""J ?'. Ji'.,_ jil*. J.J. _ , . . 1 1 1 _! .", -'J!..'. - ?1 .._.! -'-1 _1_1J 1 .-^_. '. '.i.'... .'. ' '. ' 11 . ] _ * ' " - - ' ' * 1 " ' ' 11 44 To thine own M'll bo trite, ttud It iimtit follow, as (lie night the dny, tlion cnuNt imt tlroi* l;c fsi Ixc to uny mini." BY ROB'T. A. THOMPSON. ' COURT HOUSE, S. C. SATURDAY, JUNE 27, 1857. VOL. VIII. NO. 50. * . 1 I mi I wmmmmmwmm??imm???? 11 i ?.?. .t. , - ^icteOTir.'r) IPOIETOV, Troddon Flowers. Mliftrc tiro soijrto hearts iliftt. like llm loving vine, CMing t?> unkindly rock- nnd ruinud towers, Spirits that suiVer and do not repine? Valient and sweet as lowly trodden flowers, That from beneiilh the paper's heel arise And (jive back odorous bicath instead of sighs. I hit thero are cthor hearts thut will not feel Tlie loWTy love thnt haunts tlieir eyes Jinil ears ; That would fond faith with nngot* worse than slccl And out of pit v'a spring draw idle tears. ?) Nature ! shall it over bo thy will Jin umi^s wmi yoou (U mingle, gooil will) 111 f "Why plionld the ticftvy font of borrow firaw The willing heart of nnromplnining hive? ,\Icek charity tlmt sh> ink.-* not from divtrcon, (JciitU'iH'ss, loth her tyrant* to reprovu? Though viirtue weep loreverund lament, "Willi one hard heart turn to her and relent. AVhv should therq^d'bo broken that will bond, And they that cry thu teArs in others' eyys F?ol their own anut)Uh welling without end, 'I'heir onimnel* darkened with thu >hvike ofvchb} SureI-ove, to 80inu fair Eden of his own "\Vill (leu ut livst, and leave us horealono. TiOve wecpeth nlways-r-weepolh for tho )>; sk, ]''t>r \*6e? that n(o, for v>ew that may betide; Why should not hard ambitio;; w-uep at last, 3>nvy and hatred, avarice and ptndo ? .Viite. whisper* Borrow, borrow i* your lot, They would be rebuilt?lovo rebelled* not. ?OMMOWHOATSONS. iFtiB TIIB'Kk'OWW; COC It IK II. Mr. Editor : I ask a plabo in your columns, from the faut tlmt I sco you were present at a "Tic Niu" on Tunnel Hill, through your paper of May S0tl?. Ttio Wallialla Jiimncr of Juno 6tli in ils editorial says " Wo were not present." Of tlio orators spoken of at tbat time, one i? out in tlio Banner a.& ''.Book-keeper, of T.nn ?el Hill." The other in llie JCedivec Courier 3ili Juno, as Yespncei." It'you liiul have j^ivo iho words of llie song delivered by ' Vespucci" (which I sincerely hopo you will yet do) then the picture Would have l?von complete, and ;\lf persons'could have judged as lo which portion of tbo picture Jf tlioy adioiicd iitoA'. I admire your edi loir vial very nuioli, and I have uo iluvibt that every young lady that is a render of your paper will say the samo, A few maro 'Tic IiS :ci.s" and editorials oi mo snmo Kiuq, and you will win fronj of Carol") i'.^s fairest daughters a chaplet that a Prince might well bo proud lo wear. Senator Sumner, of Mius., claimed unrestricted privileges in lehati', in reply to oral or written spueches. j think all parlies c^nccdo as much when they arc governed by a strict regard for truth and morals. I am like hi in. in an , > ' i, oilier point. 1 am an old man and tioucombatant. Tlioolhcr side of Mr. Sl*mnbht^ picture t% is tlio rook on which wo split." I would prefer to tako Abraham of old as my model with his thrco hundred and eighteen servants, born in his own household. I think ho hnd more of Ood in hi^ heart and loss of the Devil t han Senatbr St'M.vKit. In the ,* few remarks I shall make to uthe Hook keeper of Tunnel Hill" and "Vespueei," I will try and not pervert faoU it) my criticism. 1 exceedingly regret the position of the man who claims tlie Keystone State ns the p?au<j of his birth. The nltho'st undivided response of the different Southern States to thy olaiujfe of J asIks Duciianan, for tho i? i.J... i I voKIVJIll*V? Diiuwn l II.II HI^JT ?IU nuuvvauu* lional and party feeling; And passing strange this man from tho Kftyslohe Statu (I shal! cjUu!o his own language) says I do Ji'Ot Vijoii l>; uuAet wi IS i/i* 10711 !!)?!!. I -! 1 nl'icr lolling you of iho great stories I have heard at homo of Southern Chivalry to bo found in tho J'almettq .Staid, lot me say I have not yet seen within its limits a Palmetto tree. I Am told -thyro 1* ona growing in Charleston." This oan bo illustrated by an aaecdoto of two littlo boys. One qi them was invited to dine, and when tho soup.was handed avound he wept?why so, Baid tho other?tho Tesponso wa?.-4fcl rnn't catoxccpt with my oVvn spoon." This mau lun'l be fed on Southern Chi vol ry unless .} fie has his Pennsylvania spooft with hiln. fa it ptfsejUlo th;tt tho .Ijittory of- tWfoilw ???tto li-ecjiuent. nnd tbe<r figh*. nt Chyru Iwsco.ha* novor readied tiio UayrieoiioStato? I i\ ^v||i<j|i U r<jsjilv?ico of ti'ie I'resident ro ?.:onlly. electod to proudc over this Republic. l This lurtn Hays hn ha? ?ever t>con a 1'idniet1 <0 tfae. I am no chemist, I ha'-o heard fofkjQe*tod by ?oi?nU8o men tilthere in ft vary- U?'go a rebuilt of ?kutri? fhiid fit Hie ' 2 co?>sHt\?}t{t trae> I believe tl,o JJrilisb thought, so during the Kevrtiution??i r -v;)r, as ft swivel mounted <3n a few P?df.uqlto logs on SulKvan'a Inland demolished u fleet In the Charleston llafb0?V '? \ holjoya tjjo peopjtt of JJoston had ?omo tt::;;; ,: ,:^XJZX , ' nails- ir> .'eilllio ptitHjijjIo of oko of '**& W 110 pp hi H* (jffoot th%t eorflo of ilU most dist'iigundiod nod.woiiltliy g^ntjorftert of Oljarleat^i kin?l< ly ^rfUUd T^ OJ) boftrd *, vessel; and lie wrfei r'UHOvfyl Uy il\*Wftter l>reo?e on U\a Us % V^Ay lid.W, T'tiijt mart from Keystone tWe, m tfr. Hu.riirAxVx i? JVMdwt, hud V? bettor go' U> CliAflwKtott ftir^trtnjiho (tlfl) (fyo ami .?!">> i to soim f nlilloso yr JtefWof riiilndyilohiH. IMiLy jgfrfpro M & ' IA > " | lift will pans through tho District of KdgoI Held, the home of the lamented 13r66k9. | Kr'om tlio fact Unit lio caned SuVinisii lie had more gold headed banes than any man livjiig. l\-rhapa as this man Ih from Mr. Buchanan's Stale, Bkooks' friends might give him oho of these canon. To "Yespuo ci," T hope yots may ever have at your tongWs end, if the emergency requires, a song equally as appropriate as the otto sung at" the Tunnel Ilill Pic Nic." > CaUolina. Anecdotes of tho Pftlmfettocs. Last week the city council of Columbia, (S. C.) entertained the remnant of tho I'hI niello regiment of the Mexican war with a handsome supper. Several eminent gentlomen were present, and narrated some very interesting incidents of tho war. lion. Mr. Keitt, M. delivered aspe*J) from n report of which we extract the following : Mr. Keitt snid it was out of his lino to make n set fcpqech, but, with the permission of I ho cojnpany, he would rnmhle alor.g. and give an incident or two which he had derived fiom Gen. Quilman and others in relation to the Palmetto regiment?n few of which we report. (Jen. Quitman told him that when* n portion of his brigade v-an oidered into battle, Col. Butler was refused to be allowed to go, because the I'almettocs were actually hrokfen down by fatigue and privation, and he was too fi'ehta for ilnfv. I In il... New YoiU U<-gimenl and another, n?id ordered them forward. Col. Pierce Butler demanded "<i place in the picture." " N<>. sJir, your pfneeia in I he hospital.'1 "Sir!" {rttid he, t-levaltag his nohle figure, with the fire Hashing front hip eagle .eye, "never, sir, while the enemy is in sight, and our fiag moving onwiud !" lie could nol renst hint; his demand was acceded to, nnd th? rejximi?nt tool; Its " nl.ti'i* in tin* hi.-!"'" " i-.il ? - ----- i r, i".'- ? " Hunt light on the canvass. 0<*.n. Quitman told Mm, loo, i hat live ling of the Painty I to regimotit whs 'he first that waved over the city of Mex co. ' Sir, 1 was with that regiment at the galea of the city, and when 1 coiled for a Hag, to plant upon that goto, the Palmetto tl-tg was the only one thore, and that was the ling thai first spread its folds in triumph over the Capitol of Mexico. Mr. Keitt mentioned this glorious to&limony to the brave Palmetto boys, because an ?fFoi t had been undo to sumdani. them and falsify tliia liutlifn! history. Another incident he could nut omit, in his desultory ramble. While others had spoken of gallant commanders, who had fallen in tin post of honor, there were others and many subordinates nnd privates, to whom he could award a passing tribute did timo allow, but he would only allude to one ?who had been there, but had fallen in nhothur field buttling for the Palmetto State, llo alluded to lire nubia Brooks?his poor friend Brooks?his colleague?his champion?his room mate. He spoke of his nobleness, his gentleness, his magnanimity, nnd related many beautiful incidents in illustration of his character. When another regiment had fled, and nil the horrors and scourges of war were pouring down on the gallant Palmettoes, bathed in tho blood of llwir n<inn-iiil?u Shields *niil "who will follow me?" and Duller said "wo wiM"?Brocks, yefl, the stripling Brooks, ciied out, "yep, nil will follow you to the death"?-and he did.? The same hall which pierced his body shivered his musket?and a shivered tntitikel Was to adorn the signet, with the motto ta-* tin mcruisse. When this brother left, home, Brooks told Mm, his father said to his old body servant, "go with him and take care of him-^-I confide my son to you.'* llow did the good old negro act wheu the baptism of blood was going on?-when perils woro-lingering nround?whet: liot ignition of 6trnlagem wH?m*?:-y^*hcrs" - vriih none *.? watch the wounded boy but this old servant, he was at his labor of love, taking care of his charge. Crushed bones worked out ' CkAM I lift ? l*o rtftl ItAVit/l Hxiivi ?%*v .* %?! pivs'.'i ved them. Thu noble spirit passed oiH, and the corpse alone was left. What ttid the old.r.nd faithful slave? The regiment gave him n mule and cart?the soldiers helped lo make a rude coffin. With his own hands he placed the earthly remains of bit) beloved young in this liairaeh&o.onvcyed it to Mwxico'?lio carried it lo Vera C'ru&?-be bor4 it on shipboard and by railroad, to jus old mpsierV h onto/and delivered ihe body and bones of her child to hi) widowed and bereaved mother, ai the linlcl of bis birlb-plnce. Thia is literally true. Inolassio stclry?in legendary annwlti -tii? uncieiH or mtxiern ume-^-wnere t? me equal of If\i?.touching story ? The Chp.leBlQn Mercury adds to the ro* porUof,the meeting ft singularly interesting harraiivo follows : Aiuoog tbe nr.ny. vary interesting inoidentx of the I'almello Regiment,which were related on tho evoning of the entertainment, (hero was one which was not told, and to U& it whh ono of ;tho most interesting, the mo4t thrilling scenes, among tho many 1 which occurred ofi the fatal field of Oluiru\fkntak o* ?V' VVJu'ii llio Palmetto Kigiitoenl was loft jilone on tbe Moody lield, surrounded on nil *iile? by overwhelming uumbar? of merci1 less anil tron^limipMjj Tix/ii tvno were powi Mtf volley iilW vol|?y Jo rnpjd succegsion > UWDUtfh their fanka, ?n?J? pf wbjeh told with I fvaiCvil effect, lh<TVpfo<}"ti* the* noblci Dirtier couki bo beftrri hyU'nuovP lli? hvi'ud din *f battffa, urtd ertcpur?({?pg hw boy# u> d<?odjrof vnlor. South Cairo > 1'uw, my bdy*/' was his watchword. Sc r ' .<V lpmr us that voice whs heard, hi* boys moved slowly but steadily on. Suddenly that voice ceased, and was heard no more; but there camo a cry, which swept down the 9 lines quick ns lightning, "Butler is killed I c Butler is killed !" The regiment w,is par- j c alyzed ; their arms unnerved ; all hope of j victory had lied--for llteir head, their gal- ^ 1 wit chief, their lov? d father, had been taken , t from them at a time when he was most i needed, and they felt that they were or? | phans indeed. i t The gallant Shields bow, at a glanoe, the j ^ effect the fall of Col. Butler had produced on the Palmetto*8; and, putting spurs to j i no iiuuiv r uii ii v ) i vjuc up iHV lilK'O vny- ( | ing out, "Pnluu'tloes, you have lost your j Colonel! Now nvengo his death !" In- , stnntly the regiment recovered, and, with 1 ^ clinched teeth, grasping their nuns {irmly, j there came n shout, followed with n cry, j j "Go ot>, General, we'll follow." "Charge j s bayonets 1" commanded Gen. Shields, nnd r in a moment the serried ranks of the foe | wer?? pierced by the bayonets of the Pal mottoes, nnd soon they were Hying in all ' , directions, as a gallant comrade onro said, j "like clouds b?foro an angry wind." j This oh? ge en?U?d the long and bloody t battle of Clan ubusco, for as soon as it was c | known that tho 1'olque Gu?nd?, the dandy i I regiment of the city of Mexico, were routed, *j ! ilie forces at the ictcpunt, the convent nnd | I < 1 t I.J I I .1- rt . I in*: uiiujjr, luivcrcu meir li.tgs ami victory, t for the lii'th lime that day, perched upon \ (ho Ameiican flag. -+ I A Poisoning Case. A man named Roan, residing in ihe town | ^ of Mtindana, Onondaga county, \va6 blight' ly ill on Wednesday, the Olh-of May ; that J he wiffcnuite ill on Thursday 7ih, and thwt ' ho died on the Tuesday following, which | was the 12th. Suspicions that something | was wrong were, it appears felt hy the at- I i i:_^ ?.i o i - i piij mi'inii na trmiy us oh<uiumj uyc- | j ning, which were not allayed bv ensuing j j observations of ihe case. But nolhihg was , done towards solving the matter until the ; early pai l of last week, when, Ht the request ^ of several reputablo citizens of the vicinity, ( Coroner Kneeland proceeded to the spot for , the purpose of examining the case. This examination whs begun on Thursday | morning. The collin was disinterred, taken to a barn closc by the burying ground, removed from th? coffin, and a po?t mortem examination made by medical gentlemen , understood to bo competent for the work. ,.r 11.? ..< .1 \ - ui vnu uumcuia kji iiiu diuiiiiicii urn* removed, nnd submitted to (ho test of a chemical analysis by Dr. Fuller of this city, aided by Dr. Benedict of Skanev.tles. For the purpose of occupying comfortable quaf- i lers, the jury then adjourned lo the house ( of Mr. Van Ingwegin, at Mandumi. The examination of the witnesses was begun early in tho afternoon", nnd did not terminate until Fiiday evening about 11 o'clock. On Saturday morning a veidict ot guilty of murder was found against the wife. Much interest was manifested during the examination of the accused. She was on the stand from three to five hours, and, under tb?i circumstances, pasted the ordeal | very we!!, blie was, however, contradicted in some poling, by other witnesses. The testimony sho.vs thai slic gent to Auburn for arsenic, and afterwards borrowed some mor^ fr om Mrs. Norlhrup. under somewhat suspicious circumstances; but there is no positive evidence to show that she adminis1 tered any of the poison to her husband.? Tltis the jury had to infer from other oircumutnnces. There appears to be yet lacking a suflioicnt motive for the commission ot minder. . A number of tho friends of the accused w?re present after tho rendition of the verdict nod wlion she was 11 nested ; among ihi'hn hcV father, |i?r liUlo bey, nnd hersistei*. The scene was heart-rending. Slie protested her innocence of tho crime, ntul called on God us her witness; but her relatives appeared grief stricken and inconsolable. On tho way. toSkaneHteles she inquired if s)>o could have tho use of any books in thv jail, and being nnswered in the nfYii malive, said she wanted nothing but the Bible. Tlrtf accused woman is u daughter of Na? thaniol Lofitvre. an old resident of the phce ana o mm) ol largo properly, i lie tvosa family nUo resulo in the neighborhood, antf are reputable people, and in good circumstances. The case naturally excites a deep interest in thai quiet and respectable neighborhood.? Syracuse Standard. Cincinnati, Juno 13.?Thi* morning ns four United States Uepmy Marshals were artesting ? fugitive slave and bis wife, tbo slave stabbed Mr. J. C. Elliott, one of tbo Depuths, with a long aword huife ; Upon which another Deputy Marshal shot iho slave in the abdomen four time*. The negroes wefe - then taken in custody. The Marshal's wound is of a dangerous oharaotor. Thg }i<jgfo'ir U tliouglit to bo moi tal. iiiOHUrny oocnrrca in a room on Vino street', neA?v the Post-office, where the no groes were .secreted. ? ' ' Colvmmjb, June JG.?W. II. Gibson, the State'!>*??"Hifor, has resigned. A deficit of oyer-half a trillion haViQa boelO discove;od in the Ircastijy. Mr. Gibson snys the deficit existed when he took tfio office," and , that it wan cHbsed bv the defalcation (if , John. Q, Jifeslto, tba former Suto Tnhsur?j?, Tbe Governs* has appointed a coio. ^mtteo to fiWt'Mf i.^ito ill.' a Hair. N'otwillifcUoding ttjfc defalcation tbd it)ttro9t op flfo , State debt, in July, wfil be pnid. A Capital Jeu D'Esprit. h report of a kisiiy convention. ?; All the marine monsters, big fish nnd riVnll fry of the guat deep lately met in ni onveniion, to take into consideration the c' otiducl of the Ocean, and also of mankind 11 n general. The Whale whs denied Presiient.and from his grtattu'ss might be termed he Piince of Whales, lie opened the convention by staling that (,j le did not wish to rryike a speech ; lie would *' ake up as little loom, and be no longer than )ossible. (Cheers.) The Shark whispered to the Swordfi<h K bat it was not possible for the Whale to be ?' i- f..? ?.- : i.?- " ' - 1 > ivjv.il ivii^u' , I'm iic w tut iri^inv irri* nuw ; n his opinion, he only wanted a chance to ? pout, and he considered him as a regular j1 >ld blower. The Whale contended that, not withstand- a nghisgieut size, he was not exempt from uttering, lie lmd been grossly insulted by nan?ho would say /'/rwpooned, not that ,fl ie would pun upon the use made of his fat, c' :s he did ::ot wish to tnski light of such a natter, lie had been harpooned at least. 11 dan had been sarcastic towmos him, and 0 lis snuffs weie sharp and jwinud. Some [' .< r ii > i iii . . li ii ins k'iiuw wlimes iimi neen very much , " ut up and exceedingly tried He had laic- j 5,1 j learned thai a substitute for oil had been j *' nvohted, which might lessen the persecu- j ion of whales. but he learned it was al I tas. Tl;e whale alluded to n harpoon which ^ lad lately hit hirn?it made a great impresnoli upon him, and he feared hud affected j' iinn deeply, (Oreat sensation.) Hero his Velings overpowered him, and lit! sntdown j " on the shark) amid a general blubber. The Shaik rose with some difficulty, and j M lemarked thai the tail of the whale had j 1 noved him ; in fact, it was very striking.? j ? !!isown situation was far from pleasant. lJe j b was, by profession a lawyer, and he fluttered ? limsc lf one* of the deep kind. (Cheers and " nughter.) 13nt business was bad, and he rod been obliged to take in a few pupils, lie bad already represented h fa,; opening ' o a young nri in wbo fell overboard, but was x loon obliged to reject bis suit as indigesti- ' Me. Unless he bad more cases ho should f e^tve the law, and op<_n as a dentist, as be 11 was acquainted with the art of setting teeth. 1 lie held up on'.* lin as a signal thai lie had i 8 inished I 8 The Sea Serpent did not wish to intrude j ' jpon tbo convention, a* bo did not kmiw | v wheiher ho properly belonged lo the fi*h 11 tribe, nnd did not wani lo appear officious. All lie a-kod was lo be classed will) ihe Kel, ^ whom he regarded as a slippery character. v (Ileio the eel was Observed lo wrigj/le.)? 1 Lately be was passing a certain species of lho eel when lie happened io touch him, he t had been so shocked ihul be baldly recov- : v 2 red. Tlio Eel arose and said ihnt be was elccm trijied at ibese remarks ; it was evident that " l!io serpent was more, ihan bah seas over, ( rind if he was not careful lie would get himself into a rerndar coil. As for ln>inrr m I 1 o 0 (tlippery charncter, he thanked Nepiunc he did no! belong to such <; scaly set as the 's serpent. The NYhnle called the Eel to or- I tier, and the Bel culled tho Whale a .con- 1 founded old swell head, and was then sum- v mnrily put out of the convention. Tho Turtle was suffering from a slight indisposition. lie was walking ashore, a slorl time since, when he mot a party of young sailors. The result was, that ho was laid fiat on his back, arid was unable to move for some lime, and since be had not felt as usual. There was one thing to which he would call the attention of tlte convention. He piidod himself upon the purity of his political principles; be was the aldei mans best friend. Tho shark had insulted him by calling him a regular old hard shell.? [Here ihc Shark interrupted him bv asking j if was nol the case?) The Turtle replied v that he should say nothing more At present, ( but should Imve something to lay before the , next mooting. The Shark (contemptuous , ly yes, n few eggs, probably. ( The Porpoise did not exactly understand , the purpose of the convention, nor whether , all the members were present. The So ere- | tary called the roll. The whale called him j to order, and was *orry to see him reeling about in that disgraceful condition. His ; motion was quite ou'.pf order, and lie ?p- , penred to bo attempting to j^ei up a revula } lion. The1 Porpoise assured the convention | that his in&vcmentts proceeded entirely from , mti motion of the waves, but still ho should | waive his mo'ion. lie then took a back seat amid crieq of " you're a hloioerI The President remarked that lie should i be happy to near from sime of the small I frv-'-lhe oyster, lobster. and others?-who. < if not tl?e ' bono and ftinew" of ihe tribe, ; < were at h*H8Hhe nxuscUs. The Oyster pro- | cceded to open his conn, which was n hard < one. He \vii8 continually in trouble*, and I always in sora\>. stew or broil, lie had fam- I ily troubles also; Ids half hi oilier, the Cliim, l was iv disgrace lo I ho family J always fa ; liquor, and generally considered a squirt. > Sonio of bis family were very lazy, and < spent rnoit of tiieir time in bedi. There ' had also been some rakes amnng ihem.ciB- ; ating a yreat disturbance.. He was most ru- i pectHbW' iiimsc-ii; his irtiiior was quite <fn- .< tlnguishod, hih] his mntoriii)! ancestor was i Mother of Ptarl. He weni in for'Ills o\yn i right*. ?intl did not euro whe'.hcr il?? rest i got theirs o) not. * The Johftdi remarked, dnt wua my i fink, ' ^ , The Oyster continued: Th?r? one 1 of hit neighbor*?he would not oil ?iny nftnje?--TVuo was surly nnd cratitctl, that i o wiis a one tided individual, nnd no ono pproved of his mo'ions. 'i'he Crab protested against tl.is abuse, nd said the rest look advantage of him beiuko he whs "soft." Ho respectfully ren d backwurds. , 11 or ? the Codfish entered and apologized >r his lateness, ?r he had been visiting a 'hoot.- (In thought the whalo was badly It", since men took his oil to make lir/htx of. lis own case was the reverse of this: they ' >ok his liyfits?and liver, too, for that mat r?to make oil of. This might be very nod for Consumption, but i'. was confound [J had Tor huh. The most alarming kind e h?d ever heard of was ihe consumption f colfish. Ji might be very good fun for jen to cut him open and salt him, but lo ang him up afterwards was rather too bad j"ko. The Honing said thoie bad been a dispolion manifested lo play tricks of this kind i his school ; and that lately some of his umpantons hud been badly smoked. The Shad, too, in bis spring migrations p the rivers, hud been greatly persecuted, specially by the members of the legislate, Men had greatly nettled him, and ad nearly driven him in sane, lie was a uperstiiious fish, unci a most unlucky day t him was fry-day. However, he thought 1 is enemies had suffered somewhat in the rarfare, and found his tail a regular buny art. The Flatfish was not particulaily flatter'ifi !n reply to the shad. for h?? id not heeve there was a shad ow of truth in his unlinks. The Salmon, also, had his troubles, lie j ras an aristocrat?(here there was a general inning up of nose, and some titteiing, not f the codfish kind cither)?and did not asoeiate with the small fry. IIo spent most I I \ I c I mm in I i'n uullim# on/1 n\ >ent up lo the inland livers, and look his imily lo the sj/rinys and the fulls, lie hud itely been much afflicted and grossly rn.drealed at the South. Passing up the Siiannah liver, his family had been su? :oundd by a party of infamous kidnappers, and ome of his children hooked. It was his itenlion lo inform Uncle Sam and Tom of his outrage, and the Union wood be dis olved immediately, llcio there was a eneral row among the small fry. The 'rout called ihe Salmon a " Northern ii.?b, k ill* Northern principles, who had no huM-* less poking his nose up Southern rivers." Ie considered the story of tho Salmon all [amnion, and got up for political eft'eot. He kas h small fi.-h, but any insult to his nuive streams ho would not brook. The Flying fish Jlcw into a tremendous tassion, and appealed to the Jinck rial) : vho mode&tly thanked Neptune that though lis back was black his bi lly was white.? ust then there was n great disturbance, ilso, among the small fry ; who hud evi11*ally been diinking. There was a loi of suckers who were nuch inebriated, nnd one small fi:<h sung at he *'>p of his iritis llml he was a " iollv oid olc," and the cuttvpntion, like runny of our )olitieal meetings, broke op in a genera) ow ; therefore it is presumed everything villgo <m us if nothing had happened. From (he Philadelphia Dollar Newspaper.' Hoops vs. Moustaches. 1JV MADD MAUV. It is really too had that v?e ladies cannot itart a new fashion, hut all the rowdies must idicule us. 1 say roieclies, and I mean owdies, for were they gentlemen they would lot make a tyidv's costume the subject of heir jeat. It does not matter what outandish fashion the gentlemen may adopt, it s nil right, hut lot the ladu-a put on some hing how, whether for comfort or conveni noe, tho gentlemen like so m?ny swallows lying round ? cut, each one tries to see which can give the hardest hit ; nnd be :ause poor l'uss lies quiet for ft while, they hink she cannot hit back. It is a queer :otnparist>n Mr. Kditor, but il is ns good a ?ne as I choose !o give. It not at all fallant for the sterner sex to ridicule us so, ind we ladies Ijnve borne it in silence quite ong enough, hut can't do il much longer, odeed' we ean't. Pray lell me if those horrid raonstneheb mperials, &e., are of any use to the gentle lien? . If they are, I shall not say one word gainst, them for I approve of adopting anything, however ugly it may be, if it ?s con venient, economical, or jse^ul.or pertains to ihe com loft of .he person who uses it. Come, pow, sinou your ?ex ore so opposed 10 "hoops," Itl us reason together, and we ilmll see, if justice were dony.whiph would be the best suhjt c* for ridicule, moti-faehes it hoops, and Vlieti we will discuss the hoop juest ion. First, then, *??? moustaches convenient? Of course not ; because, in the lir^l place .hey need a good deal of care. You must iiave them just exactly so, or those stiff litlie bristles will be poking themselves into poor month when yotf arc enting. Bnh I mything but a hair in one's mouth ; the rery idea is enouph to disgust a gentleman. I'hen they are n <o tickle one's nas?) (if.fan, judging frbin the effort the possessor ire continually mitking to smooth them iown. 1 should not think it a very pl>' ?s:>iH KPnsaiion. Is it ? Well then, fhat m ft settled point, is it not, that moustnehef) nrj> *nl convenient %. ' Neither me thev economical. f do won tier how rmtch lliey would cost, if you hud l!>?* courrtgc to conrtt I li e nUnib?'f" of iirilf iJimcs, tlimMH, <)nirter8 of doHnrs, Ao., tlml )on (?rtvo l.? the bfti her for trimming llu*m, find have for cologne, rmwk, oils, A'c. Oh ! that is not much. No, nol much, perhaps u isn't, but you might do somo good with just tlmt lit tie. I warrnnt you would think it considetable were you to give it to some unfortunate being who asked alms of you ; but it is nothing to upend on your j moustache* Will, for my part, I think there is no economy in spending money for " r! such inconvenient appendages. Now, since they are inconvenient and 4 expensive, are they useful ? Oh no, they are not worn for use, but "give such a foreign air." That is true, for all monkeys ate foreign ; and do you think they contribute ! to the beauty of a gentleman's feature?? | If you call a monkey handsome then they | certainly do, for those that wear them in I connection with n goatee and imperial, bear ' a strong resemblance to that animal. f'eibaps they nrc* worn to attract the attention of the ladies. If so, they have attained their purpose, for a lady's eye never fails to rest upon tbe busby crop encircling a gentleman's mouth, and their little heart beats with pity to think that those who .shoitId be tbe noblest of our earth, arc tryi ing their bust to resemble the hairy-faced j animals I have mentioned before. When a farmer, in looking over his pns' sessions of growing wheat, (inds any moro ' beardy than the rest he regrets it excecd' ingly, for he is sure it will turn out poor, for [ be knows that the bead contains but litilu j substance, Or it would not nil run to tho ! beard ; and our sex reason from the samo ! principle, knowing that when the crop ! around the mouth arid chin are so flourish| ing, there can be but litllo in the "upper story," and I find my conclusion is generally right, for now a days, tbe most of our | gentlemen seem to think but little uf uny I iliing but kissing us Indies; and their conj versation consists of bul little else than trying to Halter us, by telling us of our benuty, grace, ifec., let us be as ugly and awkward I as we may. They can certainly have litlU; I sense, or ibey would not even suppose we I look their word for it when wc have seen in ( mirroio of our own, nnd 1 know the ladies I are quite as good judges of benuty hs tho j gentlemen. 80 they may lMugh ai us if they 1 please, we can laugh too. 1 am sorry indeed that there is such a scarcity of gentlemen of good solid sense, and such a profu\ siou of moustaches. j fcio you me tired of talking aboul iho moustaches. Will, it is the tiuth, they ate oisagreeauKi mings io talk about, lot alone lo look at, and if you really wish it we will change the subject to hoops. Wo have said that moustaches were neither convenient to a person or useful ; nor do they pertain to ft ptraon's comfort ; but, dear sir, hoops are just exactly what nious- . laches are not. In the first place, hoops are healthy.? You need not laugh, for let it appear as it may, it is nevertheless true, Had the gentlemen of the present age cultivated their brain, instead of their moustaches, they would not fail to remember, what every physician asserts, that the number of heavy skirts which the ladies have been in tho | habit of wearing that they may not present : a dowdy appearance, which would exceed inj?ly inovtify their fathers, besides brothers and uncles, are decidedly injurious, and ofIt'i) result in serious consequences. Wo have long been aware of (he fact, but the ladies in general would rather have j sacrificed their health,ease and comfort than hurt the feelings of their ma'e fiiends, until they found the gentlemen had consideration, which was proved when wo donned tl>e Bloomer costume, so we detei mined to dress its best suited our feelings ; we doffed tho Oriental fashion and once more donned iho , long shirts, and though dressed warn) enough, we u-e the light, hoops in place of I n siinnrftiiitv nf nnitia j - a .1MB ' -? abundant evidence that the hoops are healihy. Hoops are economical, for the cost of ihein is hm n tiifli?, in companion to that of the superfluous garment heretofore \vo?n. The)' nre convenient, too, for I bey do not hinder the wiim'h of ovtr dross i.i the win* j tur, and io summer we do not have to snc rijSce our own comfort for the tlio sake of ! appearances. Now we hllVt* I lull brir.t?o nm MC? . - I I"" ",w ful by hhofcittg that they inc healthy, convenient and economical. but they are useful in another way, loo. You know the gentlemen are very fond of kisiing ua ladies. "Now ii is always bad enough to ho kissed by h gen tie man. minus a moustache, hul it is woiso to bi' kissed by I hem now ihat'!ieii nmuth ifc.entirely auriounded by | bristle.*. When it i* r.ecessniy to use a flesh } j" brush on our fucoS we. prefer to boy one cf ? the light kind, and not lake the greasy hair j. I appendages of a Kit er day genilemaus up- : I per lip and chin. Hut we are the weaker ! ?,.v Mr o..,l tlw 1 ? I JAIUVI, mill IIIU ^rillK'fliril nic ttlF ; head strong, lluit all our reMstflhco would ' he like chnflf scattered to the, wind, and we I musl needs submit to hiive o?r faces well | greased, eould wo not.invent something to keep the gentlemen at a proper dilnnce. So hero comes tlib hoops to onr assistance and they have proved themselves really useful. So, any what *<*? will, wo intend i to wuar them until wo find something to suit j us hetier. * ? ? -? V M AN*KIK1> AS'O TURIN IH^HftVEKH.? M.;i>kijul |?rtv bent?1. Thoao Vho destroy tlioin, Iutoos and warriors, 2. Tlioso who olieat tliem, stnU'tnnn, j>ri?M? nnd quack*. ft. Tlioffo wb'o annuo t hem, as 8ing<;rs, actors, ilanccr?,novel writers. Hut Icfist of all, thrtVt* who sponk mUl?, mid instruct them,