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THE HERALD IS PCVBLISHEFD EVERY WEDNESDAY MORNNG, n At Newberry, S. 0. BY THOS, P. GRENEKER, Editor andjroprieTor. Terns, $s.00 per nnfU A Family Companion, Devoted to Literature, Miscellany, News, Ag Invariably.in Advance. c- the paper is stopped atthe expirstID 0 jume 'or which it is paid. The4 mark denotes expiration of .01'W c t Wagdew Clocks, Jewef"od IVITHIES AND JEW.ELMIT A t the New Store on Hotel Lot. I have now on hand a large and elega: ,IRAortmenIt of WATCHES, CLOCS, -JEWELRY Silver and Plated Ware, YWI*N-AN0 "EAR STRINGS, GPECTACLES AND O#ECTACLE CAES. WEDDING AND BIRTHDAY PRESENTS. -; I.MSS ARTT. All orders boy aiil prouiptly atenled to. Watchmaking and Repairing Ioue Cheapnly Idd 6ith. Dispid-. CAItaa e.aine y stock and prices. ,No,. c.11, 47-tf M?7iscelIaneous. A Watore COLDEN NA fDr. LIGHT on !he 5AW N OREAT FUTURE in this life, through t1u. dar valley, and in the life eter nal, as seen i the bist.thought. of l-,eading authors aid scholars rmon whom axe Bishops Simpson, Foster, War ren. Iurst anid Foss.,Joseph Cook, Deecher. .Talmage, Dr. Carrie, Dr, .larch. Dr. Me Cosh, Dr. Crosby. Dr. Ctlyler. Geo. D. Pren tice, Dean Stanley, Whittier. Longfellow and others. The subjects -treated are Death, Immortality, Millenins and. Second Ad vea,.3he Resurrectiont, Judgment, the Pun ishment of tbe Wicked, and the Reward of the Rigihteois. A rich feast awaits the reader of this book. It contains the grand. eat thoughts of the world's greatest a4t)ors on subjects of the most profound interest t every one. Not gloomy but brilliant. Ther Is.not a dull page in the bool.- It, j. abso Intely without arival. Everybodywill read 3$t Sehool Teachers, Students, You Men and Ladies, acting as agents for -th, book are-nakiag over $100 a month. Sells fast. One agent sold 71 first 1.5 days, another 46 in S days, another 11 In one day, another R. and 5 Zibles in 5 days, a lady sold !) in i; hours. Secure territory quick. Also agentr wanted for the best Illustrated Reviaea New Testament, and for the finest Family Bible. er sold by agents. Send for circulars. P. W. ZEIGLER & CO., 915 ArchSt., Philadelphia, Pa. 80 X Adams St., Chicago, nl. Aug.17, 33-4m S 9,000 REWARD For any case Blind, Bleeding, Itching,-Ul cerated. or Protruding PILES that DEBtsols Pile Eemedy fails to cure. Prepared by J. P. Miller, M. D., 915 Arch Street. Phila., Pa. None genuine without his signature. Send for circular. All druggists or general storep have it or will get it tor you. $1. Sold in Newberry by Dr. S. F. FANT. Druggist. Aug. 17, 33-2m. WESTERN MANUFACTURE, A SUPERIOR LOT OF BUGGIE, PIIIXET0Ng -AND CARRIAGES, Always on hand at J. TAYLOR'S REPOSITORY, Below M. Foot & Son's, on opposite side. Call and look at them. For stle by TAYLOR & CLINE. Mar. 9, 10-ly. PATENTS. F. A. Lehrnan. Solicitor of American and [ Foreign Patents, Washington, 1). C. All business connected with Patents. whether bebore the Patent Office or the courts, promptly attended to. No charge made un le-ss a patent is secured. Send for circular. Sep. 21, 35-tf-w.l. OTrI'' aiddress EDsoN BRos. IN Attorneys - at Law a.nd Patent Solicitors. s.l7 S,eventh Street, Washington. D. C., for instructions. Rea-1 sonaable terums. Eeferences and advice sent FnLEE. We attend exclusively to Patent business. Reissues, Interferences. andl cases rejected in other han's a specialty. Caveats solicited. Upon receipt of model or siketch and description we give our opinion as toi patentability, FREE OF CHARO'. We refer to the Commnissioner ot Patents, also to Ex .Comimissioners. Eistablished ls'G. Sep.21,.:M-tt.w.l. Patents for Inventions. .. W. W. ANDERSON. .. C. sMI1Tht ANDERSON & SMITH, ATTORNEYs-AT-LA W, 3o. 700 Seventh Street, Washington, D. C. No fee for preliminary examination. No fee unless patent is allowed. Fees less than any other responsible agency. Books ei information sent free of charge. Rteferences .furnished upon requiest. Sep). 21.,:S-tf.w. . PAVILION HOTEL,: CHARLESTON, S. C. This popalar and centrally located House has been entirely renovated during the past summer and was REOPENED to the travel ing public on August 16, 1890. Terms, $2 and $2.50 per Day, T.E. GAITT.TARD, Nov. 17, 47-tf. PROPRIETO)R. THE PENNINGTON HOUSE, (Formerly the Mansion House,) NEWBERRY, S. C. JOHN M. PENNINGTON, Proprietor. This popular and conveniently located house has been opened by tie present P'ro prietor, who will spare no pains to make his guests comfortable. With rooms large, airy. clean and well firnishied, a table sup. plied with the best that can bie la polite -and ready attention on the part of hisi ser vants, he feels assured of giving satisfa tion. Terms, $1 per Day; $12.50) per Month. June22,25-t. Yourselves by making money 3~I5when a golden chance is offere. --E Ithereby always keeping poverty' 8111trom your door. Tliose who al ways -take advantage of the good chance-I for making money that are olTered, gene rall becomel wealthy, while those w ho doc not improve such chances remain in pover. ty. We want many men, women. boys and -girls to work for us right in their own lo calities. The business will pymore than ten times ordinary wages. Wefurnish an Iexpensive outfit and all that you need free. No one who engages fails to make . money very rapidy. You can devote yonrei whole time to he work, or only your spare mnoments. Full information aall that ila needed sent free. AddresS Stinson & Co..; Fortland, Maino. Oct. 13. 42-1)v. A1iseeUqueous. TUTT'S PILLS. INDORSED BY PRYSICIANS, CLER-OYMEN, AND THE AFFLICTED VERYWHERE, THE GREATEST MEDICAL TRIUMPH OF THE AGE. SYMPTOMS OFA TORPID LIVER. Losof a tite- ausea,bowels costive, ai te wi~hTduolsensationin iEe-back R,.ainunder the ioiuler BERKis~uess after e t ilh~a~isin on to exertion of body or mind Zfy~oL?emprLoLw - -n Los memor, a re ofhvin n eted some duty, ines?&izinese. rIng ofthe Heart, ots7befbre yes, Y w sk- eadche, Rest ess eesae tnigh" hi colored:Urine. a? TEM WARNOS-AB t14 mED, SERIOUS DISEASES WiLL SOON BE DEVELOPED. ITU? SPUMLaree dsocatlyadaptedto, uch cases,one dose e fects ehuefang of feeling as to astonish the suferr. They Kqcep~ tho"APPeMUeo and cause the -Dto TAke on Fle*h. thus the system is rbnobshed.andbytlheirTonleAetiononi the 01 e.tfeOra Fieguuiarxioein are pro-z cucv Price 25 cent& Zi A.-w XLr7 t, W.Y. TUTT'S HAIR 0YE, GRAY HAIR or wuislm-1 ct"ged &-GPoskY BLAcx by a single a Ppleatiolg o imparts -a-natu co or, acts Tn.iaman Sold byDrnggists, or sent by expres on receipt of $1. o1fce, 35 Murray St., New York. i (rDr.&TMMR' XLNCIAL of Valuab,le Information ad .i Reipts .ill be mUed FREE on ap STOMACH EITTE rhou;h Shaien in Every Joint And fiber with fever anti igqc. or bilious re. nittent. the system may vet be free from ;he malignant virus witfh Ilostetter's Stomach Bitters. Protect the system against it with 'his beneficcnt antispasmodic, which is urthermnore a sipreme remedy for liver com ai nt, constipation, dyspepsi. debility. rheu natism, kidney troubles and other aimcnts. For sale by all Prfggists and Dealers generais E IN MUSIC! Prof. RICE'S ternatlonal System of Rapid Musi cal Instruction ! Magical SELF TEACIllNG OF MUSIC! hie Only SHORT CUT in the World to MUSICAL KNOWLEDGE! All may now learn muwsic Who'never learned before, And all who havce learned, May flow learn the.more. As this system is so thmoroumghly generic m. applies t, all music precisely as writ n, itse principles can never be forgotten. How delight.ful! how simple! are the pontaeous expressionls from those who le tiEis system a THOROC'GH examinatiOfl. It is published in three grades, and a ?parate grade for Guitar. The price is fix d SO LOW that everybody may nd should possess this woNDERVGJ.LY SCIEN [FtC labior and timue-savimg System. We guarantee to every person who will dy and practice only 15 minUtes a day, >larn. more of the science of mnusic in iree months with PROF. RICE'S SYSTEM 'F OBJECT LESSONS than by any other imany years. As the public have not been accustomed aso much cond'used musical knowledge, tis may sound 4l.eptical. We can assure on this is no hocus-pocus arrangement, Ut soUND SCIENTIFIC FACTs, Which we are radv to demonstrate to ANY CNE FREE OF HRGE. Fail not to investigate and rocure this System, for it is one of the ret bonu to anind.NYM h o en for the ENTIRE THREE GRADEs, includ 'g the Guitar Grade ! The above offer will hold good for a hort time only. More than Five Dollars' orth of scientific musical knowledge can hus be obtained for this paltry sum. This ytmiofequal advantage to the ad nced stude .t as to those who know no hig about muiC. g- Agents and Teachers of this Sy4tem anted ini every town in the State. To~ onest workers a handsome income is guar-~ ueed. Send for pamitlet aidls ou Music.l nd our extraordtinary induce-. tents to A gents. g- FREE MUSIC TO ALL. 3 irs. Ws H. CLARK, Gen'1 Agt. W. H. CLARK, iTATE SUPERINTENDENT OF GNIS NEWBERRY, S. C. Aug. 24, 34-tf. W. H. WALLACE,I .ttorney -at-Law, NEWBERRY, S. C. COMFORT. If the nigbt is deary, It leads-to the day; If the hear: is weary It learns to pray. If, standing lonely. The tears'fslI fast, We know it is only Till life is passed. 'Ti. all In measure Of each day's share The pain and pleasure, The joy and despair. We. lqe on the morrow The ache of to-day; The sweet and the bitter Must both pass away. DISENCHANTED. -0 Pretty little Mrs. Norton sit tiig behind the urn was as fair and lovely a two year matron as ever smiled. over a table at her! lord and master. Ie was a fine looking fellow. too, that busband of hers, and iv Was very evident 'that there war no lacle of warm affectiW btWpep themi, for all the' subject of con versation was one of very decided opinion, at least upon Mrs. Nor. t6n's part. Just now she sugared and Icoreamed 9r. Norton's second cup of coffee, and handed it towards him with a little indignant re mark: 'But it's too bad, Frank, and I believe you think so too.' And she looked suspiciously as if there were tears in her pretty eyes. 'Indeed, I think it's just as tad as it can be-bad enough for us, but a thonsand times worse for Uncle Tom.' [t[ in too ridiculous! The idea of him falling in love at this time of life, but more than ridiculous in falling in love with such a creature as Aura Vane.' Frank laughed at Lottie's em phatic remarks. 'We mustn't forget that of course the gentleman has a per. fect right to do as he pleases with his own, dear. His being sixty years old does not preclude him from even marrying Miss Vane if he chooses to.' Lottie looked very earnest in. deed as she answered : 'I know all that, but why can't UJncle Tom see her as she is, as everybody else sees her ? She is forty if she's a day,' said Lottie. IIe interrup)ted her with a little tormentingT laugh. 'A very suitable age you must admit for him, Lottie.' 'Frank Norton I How can you, when you know just as well as I :1o that its only Uncle Tom's money she is after ? And to think he promised to leave it all to baby if we'd name him after him, and I wanted the little darling called Rtoland so badly, instead of Tiommziiy. 0 Frank ?you never will know what a sacrifice.1 made. And I'll change baby's name yes,.1 will-it Uncle Tom marries that horrid old thing, who never had a beau, nor an offer before in er life. How ever she contt iied to entrap him I'd like to know.' T wo bright little red spots were faming in ber cheeks, and despite the passionate bitterness of her protest Mr. Norton realized there was a great deal of righteous truth in it, and he was looking grave and thoughtful just as the front door was opened, and in a minute or two Uncle Tom him self came in. 'I am sorry to have been so late for dinner, my dear,' he said briskly, with a smile toward Lot tie, 'but I have been driving in the park with Miss Vane, and really it. was dusk before I knew it.' 'Are you personally acquainted with Miss Vane, my dear ?' be1 continued presently, after dilating upon the beauty of the park in its Slate autumn dress. And then Lottie purposely' ~avoided her lord's eyes, where she knew, full well would be a cautionary signal. S'Not at all intimiately, Uncle ~Tom. When I was a little girl she was a grown up woman, ado course, I never bad occasion to ae sociate with her. As a child never fancied her, however.' He laid bis knife down in thi act of slicing off a delicious piec< of brown meat. L 'You mean to insinuate tha Aura is as old as-all that?' Then Frank took up the eudge in his quiet, unimpassioned way 'I don't tlin4 my wife woul< lin8inuate' uuything, Uticle Tom IShe simply knows it to be a fact as I do, and any one else wh< cares to think at all about it, tba Miss Vane is past forty years old .,But then,. of course, no one eve: troubles one's self about it. Corn iplexion and hair can both bi bought nowadays.' 1 am perfectly aware of tha fact. But I assore you I have sat istied myself that Aura is one o: those rarely prescried womej who at thirty-for I have it fron her own lips that her last birth day was her thirtieth-are mori ebarming and mature, and overj Nway suitable to a discerning man'i Laste than when young and girl ilsh. Ard he looked straightly, de fiantly, in Lottie's eyes. 'Oh ! well,' she retorted stub bornly, 'you'll find out some day. 'Yes,' he answered, 'I expect tc ifind out that the woman who wil honor me by being my wife is jusl what I have s4id she is in all re spects. Frank, don't you want tickets for the opera to-nigbt., I've a couple to spare if you want to take Lottie to hear Patti. Mise Vane and I are going.' Qf course, Frank accepted the tickets, and after dinner, when Lottie went up to the nursery with him for their usual half hour of baby-worship, she declared she never wouid call him by his odionE name again. 'He shall be mamma's darling little Roland now,' she said, hold ing him in her arms and shower ing, kisses on his sweet, latighing face. Frank laughed. 'You had better wait a little longer, Lottie. Perhaps the old Inan's. disenchantment will come even yet.' 'It's disgusting,' she said. And then she said good-nighi to her year-old boy, with dozen of kisses and bugs, and gave hirr back to his nurse. 'I want you to go on an errand please, Frank,' she said suddenly ai they went into their owi room, 'up to Blandford's for ar invisible net and hair-pins. Will you, Frank 1' 'An invisible net? What or earth is that ? Can't you see iti I[ow shall 1 know when I've gol it ? i'll enquire.' She gave him a little push to ward the door. 'Never mind, Mr. Impudence You simply ask for what I tel you, pay what they char-ge, and bring it home to me.' So good natured Frank put or his hat and started off to Bland frd's, the famous hairdresser's where be was to buy the invisibl< net, to meet Unbcle. Tom on th< doorstep, impatiently waiting foi the carriage that was to take hirr to his beloved. 'There is plenty of time,' Frani said as he stopped a minute. 'Ge1 our cane, Uncle Tom, and walls up to Blandford's with me.' Uncle Tom looked at his watch 'Well. I will. I shouldn't lik< to keep Aura waiting, though.' 'There is no Deed to,' Franl answered. And they started off, every bi of Frank's determination and tac kept continuously on the alert t< to prevent the old gentlewai from discussing Miss Vane. Hlowever, by violent effort h< succeeded till they reached Bland ford's, where an obliging shop man gave them seats, and begge tbem to wait oniy one mnoment as they were so very busy jus then. And Frank and Uncle Tom sa down and waited, close by ther being a tall Venetian sereer which neither particularly notice' until, in a low, yet clearly dii inct voice, they beard a sentene or so that startled them. 'How will that do, Miss Vane T have applied nar-ly an entiz - bottle of the enamel ; but, pardon' [ me, the hollows and wrinkles areg so deep that it is almost impossi ble to obliterote them.' 3. 'it will have to do, I suppose. Fortunately all my new costumes have longer oleeves than the old ones. Now, it you will make I baste with my bair, I will wear the 'perfection' to-nigbt,.I think. I And, oh ! please remember the touch of pencil on my eyebrows.1 They are getting so horribly thin4 and pale!' Beyond doubt of mortal com-1 prehension it was Aura Vane'sl voice, and Frank actually pitiodl the look that was on the old gen-1 tleman's face. And then-no one in all the. world ever knew bow much an .,unbeard of, awkward catastrophe happened except Uncle Tom, 1whose foot reached out and touch. ,,ed the door-the door in the - screen flew open, and revealed to "both gentlemen the startling siaht - of a woman with a head almost as ;'bare of hair as a pumpkin-only .the merest wisp of gray hair, twirled in a little pig-tail on the! *crown-and on the dressing-table;: beside her a heap of soft, rippling tresses, and a bottle of belladonna,. and of enamel, and various sponges and brushes, and other parapher nalia. There was a shriek o1 horror frorp the bald-foreheaded lady, a series of 'Ob-o-o-h's ' and then it all seemed in less than a min ute-the attendant threw a shawl over Miss Vane's pate. Uncle Tom gave a groan of utter hor ror as he got up and took Frank's arm. 'I am going home,' he said ter. sely. 'I've seen enough. What an escape! To think-to think I was so near iarrying-that' I think th6 story is told. Niss Aui a Vane did not secure her rich husband. And the baby's name was not exactly charged, but Lot. tie inserted 'Roland' for his mid. dIe name, and as once in a while they call him, in jest, of course, 'T. Roland,' I shouldn't wonder if, after all, the little fellow had his pretty name and the fortne too. fsullaneos. WILL THE WORLD COMIE TO AN END THIS YEAR. From the Burlington Hawkeye, Well, yes, anxious, troubled questioner, it will. We hope you will feel satisfied to have the mat. ter definitely settled. And we can tell you positively that it will. We know as much about it as Prof. Proctor, as Prof. Swift, as gte Smithsonian Institute, and the -'National Observatory, and - more than the U. S. Signal Ser vice. You have been tormented Mand tortured, no doubt,, by Mo Ether Shipton, and by the comet, Mand the Canadian farmer who built him an ark and had it all gready to launch for the 19th of MJne-be can go into the ferry $business with it now, or sell it to the Mississippi Barge and Trans - portation Company-and by the Millerites, and one fool thing and another until your mind is dis gtracted and you can't sleep, and Edon't think it worth while to pay your debts. All the same, you Rwill have to pay or go out of the business. And if the world should come to an end at ten o'clock to morrow morn iug, up to 9:4% A. M9 money w. u!d be eight per cent., on gilt edge paper, and none too asy to get then. SSo you see the fact that the world acoming to an end won't make ny difference in your business af 'airs. It won't make any change in the shallowness of straw berry box es this season; t be good berries will b~l e on the top the same as last 'ear. With eternity staring them ~n the face mankind will go right on swindling and lying, and pray. ong and singing, and swearing and dealing honestly, and dIoing ricky things, loving and hating, aughing an.d weeping, until the' nd comes and the lips that cursedl or prayed are hushed alike in the quiet of death. aFor the world is coming to an ? end. And the comets can't hasten e and a million -omets can't r itard its eoming. There i, no bell -for it. If it scares you. we cau'i belp it. We must tell the trut about this thing, since you have lasked us what we know about it lAnd, indeed, we know more tbar Iwe have told. The end of al Ithings terrestrial is coming to morrow, and you can't stop it by climbing a tree or crawling, intc a cave. Every day and every lbour the end of the world comnes to some unsuspecting mortal wh is only thinking up his plans for next summer, or studying over a 1boss trade' he has in his mind for Lnext week. Every time your 'eart beats the end of the world comes for some one, and just as sure as you have, or more surely if you have not, paid your news paper subscription, it is coming to you. And, good iiubscriber, fear ful and troubled about comets and many things, when it does come. if it catches you off your feet with your business raveling out at the edges, your bil!s unsettled, your notes protested, your subscription not paid, your pew rent overdue and your pastor running into debt for his living, with your conscience burdened with wrongs and your life bristling with uncorrected and unrepenant faults, you won't need any comet nor any long pro cession or peribelia to scare you. You won't think of the planets then, good man. You will think about the horse with a spavin you sold to poor Greenwig ; you will think about the four dollar over. coat you sold poor Hayseed for $14.75; you will remember the seven cent- prints you sold to old Mrs. Thistlepod for fourteen cents ; you will think about the firkin of axle grease you painted with butter and sold for thirty. seven cents for table use ; you will think of the mortgage you fore closed on poor Ragweed's farm af ter he had paid you thirteen per cent. Lr the money for ten years; vou will think of the loads of three feet cord-wood you hauled to town and sold at full market price; you will think of the sand you sifted in the brown sugar ; you will remember how you sold 1,700 pounds of coal for a ton ; you will think of the paper you took for a year and a half and never paid for; you will recall a thousand little meannesses and weaknesses of whibic you have been guilty ; you will think bow you made your money, and how pre. :ious little good it is going to do yuin the country whither you aegig; and, poor man, if you have fastened your faith and trust to nothing better than Mother Shipton, or 'Vennor, or General Hazen, or some celestial tramp of a comet, the sound of the trumpet, the voices of the beasts, the seven thunders, the hail and fire mingled with blood, the darkened su, the vials of wrath and the voice of the eagle oould not add to your fears. When the end of the world comes for you, that will be the only end you will take any interest in. It will be awful enough for you, if it comes before you are re.ady for it, and unless you know you have a dead sure thing on eighty-nine years or more-and you know whether you have or not-you keep one eye open all the time for the end of the world. So don't you worry about twc comets, or conjunctions, or per. ihelia, or eclipses or spots on the sun. They have nothing to dc with your case at all. You may not live to see the world burned up, and you pass away in the final dissolution of all things terrestrial, but you are going to live to your end of the world, and don't you forget it. That's all you have te dJo with it. You go home now and quit worrying about prophe cies. Admire the comet withoul a fear. Study astronomy for its wonders and beauties, and not foi fanciful and ignorant and1 super stitious terrors. You go hom< and sell clean goods by full meas ures and honest weights;. teaci your clerks that a thirty-five inch stick doesn't measure a yard o: dress goods ; don't weigh yoursel on the bay, and the wagon by it self; make your ton of coal weigl twenty hundred; and cut youl wood "four feet long; be hones 1amt square in your dealings; naa "our pew rent every week, and your newspaper subscription ii. advance ; read the revised Testa ment oftener, and go to churct regularly; be manly and pay youl debts as last as you can, and livt so th:ft you can look every mar. in the eyes when you meet hian give up swearing, and try fami13 prayers as a substitute, don't bt afraid of any man that ever wore a bat, always stand by your own honest convictions, and then, i1 some night a comet with a tail like a torchligbt procession, and the perihelion, Pf Jupiter, and an eclipse of the sun, and old Mo thei Shipton. should fileinto your Front yard and kick and thump at the door: 'We want you olc. man !' you would hop cheerfully out of bed, and shout back : -Ali right . wait till I get on m, trousers!' and go out to join the procebsion without a tremor. Bless your timid soul, non.-pay ing subscriber, the other end of the world is nothing, if you only shape this end as near right at you know how. SCIENCE IN COURT. 'Do you plead guilty, or not guilty ?' asked the Judge, address ing Simms. 'I doesn't plead at all. I isn't no lawyer. Yer can't ketch me wid yer pints.' 'Look out, you impudent ra, casl. Are you guilty or not guil. ty?' 'Now yer'8 getting at de facks. [ has de honor ter state dat I is not gulty.' 'Yis be is, Jedge,' exclaimed Cobb. 'He bit me in de moof wid his fist.' 'I neber tech de man.' .Didn't you bit him in . the month ?' asked the Judge. 'No, 8ar ; I didn't put my ban' on him. In fack, neber tecb bim.' 'Jedge, I swar on de bigges' Bible dat he bit me.' 'Now, look a beah,' said Simms, 'de courts of dis Ian' ain't techni cum enuf. When yer jerks a man up on a charge yer's got to stan tiate de charge. Ef dar wuz moab eddycation 'mong de niggers an' white folks dar wouldn't be half de trouble in de courts. Is my an' techin' dis table, Jedge' And he placed lA b'nd on the desk. 'Yes, sir.' 'Dar's whar yer's off.- Case wby ? 'Cordin' ter flosophy what ['ve been studyin' you can't tech nothin'. Dat is air 'tween my han' an' do table. Ef' my han tech do table hit would stick dar. Now, look aheah, Ant'ny,' and the prisoner turned to Cobb, 'is yer' gwine to put yerself in such a igner'en t lighbt ? Yer's been a stu gent too long not to knowr better den dis. Is yer gwine to add yer weight to bolin' the cullud people of Little Rock to tbe groun'? Now, ez a stugent, an a man what understan's fiosofy, did I tech yer ?' 'Come to think ob hit,' answered Cobb, 'I don't believe yer did. 'Now, Ant'ny, ez a stugent, an' a man ob scient-eO, didn't yer run agin a post an' knock dem teef out?' 'Viewiug this subjeck in a scien. fic light, I believe I did.' 'An' now, Ant'ny, as a stugent an' a larned man. won't yer with draw dis case pen din' agin me, in which yersel is de scientific plain tor, an' in what 1 is do scientific 'fendent ?' 'Yes, I will. Jedge, dis man neber hit me, an' I hereby wid draws de mistake.' 'Dat was 'zackly right,' says Simms, as the two men went down together. 'Ef all the men of science would hang tergedder dis way, dar wouldn't be half de trouble an' oneasiness in de worl'.' [ Little Rock Gazette. If you would never have an evil dfeed spoken of in connection with you don't do one. Let the slanderer take comfort; it is only at fruit trees that thieves throw stones. The duty of religion flows from a snirit of religion. INTERMINABLE MANV. SCRIPft-t he editor; -willbeese-rw receive '.hose heavy rolls of -maWript -inly destined for bis waste bAekt? Alas,,that so ma!uires of fools :ap 6bould be wastedin th Aor >f so many to rush into,V t1 rbere niay be many rpetieMil aos inU the world. Ad PAsiblYa yet an .n k nowa.Scott.or..Dickns, )r a hidden Junius, but in ,vaicire iearch throagb. the.ink-spted pages rushed in the editorial.'ac Lums., for -iglimmeringA ol,hese urpinaries. It..isa t1oagem s thing to. reprsA 'the eort.Lof these would-be authqrs,;nt what is to be . done-? Bepa , tey plead that tey thoghtr1Fe ,might want somethipg4 41lup ur .paper,! are we -perforceab liged to astonish the Muse.1fth :heir jargon, and cause.the.".opg Jeceased literary men to. fafiy rise in their sepulchres.in.earpest protest against thi..waste -of;tn 4nd paper? Must the editorpal fraternity be turned into unay over a tale without a plot. 0of a poim fertile in ;rhymes buto lately devoid of sense .or metre ? Eow can the excruciating..tr tore of poring over long pagps,al most without end, of bad grasm mar, and worse chirograpp3be endured ? The soul of wit-gev ity-has never entered into those comppsitions, but the marrpwless ghost of meaningless phrases is t4eir sole embodiment. We. -propose that -a hospit(.be established for the :u"e.o $he malady of interminable and in ucssant scribbling. There is g@at .ieed of such an institution. Pro per diet and regimen may prove ierviceable to. some of them wri ers. Thy must be ton e down, (ooled off, repressed. Skill and patience will be required. . When their treatment shall hav. Au0 ceeded in learning them that two great things are requisiteo give them an author's just reputation -first, to understand-fully What they are writing abou,t, andse ond, to express themselves in the fewest possible words, consistent with sense and clearness-then they may be turned.loose. Then o longer their rolls of manusorpt will appear, but modest and sen ile communications instead. R. R. REG ULA TIONS.-The Aaso [uiated lines of the Carolinas have issued an . order to the following ecffect. No conductor shall smoke ,>jr che w tobacco while ;on .daty, or drick any .spirits ; or indulge in conversation with any passen ger except on business. If be.ac cepts a cigar from a passenger he must forfeit twenty-five cents to thbe com2pany.. Lastly . e, shall wear.. a uniform without-pocket., and shall carry a satchel suspend ed from the shoulder, in wl4ch to place all tickets or moneys colb lected. Under the operation of this law the efficient conductor will be able to rival the circus as a 'great moral exhibition. [Winnsboro' .Nees. Give not thy tongue 1too great a liberty lest it take thee prisoner. A word unspoken is like a sword in a scabbard-thine ;if vented, thy sword is in another's hand. If thou desire to be held wise, be so wise as to hold thy tongue. The -1s -oMi"f%iiM ito reap more than you sow. Sow an at, and you reap a habit, sow a habit and you reap acharacter ; sow a character, and you reap a destiny. Spare the feelings of your friends. Don't flatter yourself that friendship authorizes you to say disagreeable things to your intimates. Money and fame are the two tbings that men work hardest- 4or, and after death, one is wed~ to them just about as much as ithe o)ther. Without the virtue offaiwity one can neither be.honest 'n roT erty .nor contented in abuindance. The height of meanness is to exnIt in its sucWes